Infatuation —843 recovery. During these interactions, infants learn Malatesta, C. Z., Culver, C., Tesman, J. R., & Shepard, communicative tools and important information B. (1989). The development of emotion expression about others’ emotional states. Both infants and during the first two years of life. Monographs of the caregivers are active agents in these interactions, Society for Research in Child Development, 54, mutually acting to shape the emotions and behav- 1–104. ior of the other. These face-to-face interactions Thompson, R. A. (2006). The development of the wane as infants become more mobile and require person: Social understanding, relationships, communication across larger spaces regarding more conscience, self. In E. Eisenberg, W. Damon, & R. M. complex situations. Infants use pointing to create Lerner (Eds.), Handbook of child psychology: Vol. 3. joint attention, and they combine pointing and Social, emotional and personality development (pp. 24–98). Hoboken, NJ: Wiley. other gestures to create shared intentionality with Tomasello, M. (1999). The cultural origins of human others around interesting and desired objects and cognition. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press. events. In addition, infants use others’ emotional Tomasello, M., Carpenter, M., & Liszkowski, U. (2007). expressions to guide their behavior in ambiguous A new look at infant pointing. Child Development, situations, evidencing an understanding that others 78, 705–722. have important information to convey in their Tronick, E. Z. (1989). Emotions and emotional assessments of such a complex world. During the communication in infants. American Psychologist, 44, second year of life, infants develop a more sophis- 112–119. ticated understanding of others’ goals and inten- tions, allowing for action-based communication around the intentions of others. These provide the avenue for more complex imitation and helping In f a t u a t i o n behavior, shared pretense, and the development of language. Infatuation is a state characterized by intense Infants are thus capable of much more than we ­feelings of passion toward a specific individual. once thought in their ability to understand the The term infatuation typically refers to the early emotions and information provided by their care- stages of romantic love, before the infatuated indi- givers through both direct and indirect communi- vidual has had a chance to get to know or develop cative acts. These communications provide the an intimate relationship with the love object. foundation for psychological growth as infants Colloquially, infatuation is frequently associated approach the development of linguistic communi- with youth and suggests an irrational, capricious cation and develop an even more complex under- approach to love. Although some consider infatu- standing of others. ation to be a special, perhaps early or intense form of passionate love, researchers often use the term Ross A. Thompson and Emily K. Newton infatuation interchangeably with passion, pas- See also Mother–Child Relationships in Early Childhood; sionate love, limerence, or being in love. Therefore, Parent–Child Relationships; Parenting this entry reviews research and theory on infatua- tion and these associated terms.

Further Readings Adamson, L. B. (1995). Communication development Features of Infatuation during infancy. Madison: Brown & Benchmark. Fogel, A. (1993). Developing through relationships: When individuals are infatuated with a potential Origins of communication, self, and culture. Chicago: or current romantic partner, they frequently University of Chicago Press. exhibit any or all of an assortment of features. For Gopnik, A., Meltzoff, A., & Kuhl, P. (1999). The one, infatuation is often characterized by persis- scientist in the crib. New York: Morrow. tent, intrusive thoughts about the love object. Legerstee, M. (2005). Infants’ sense of people: Precursors These thoughts may take on a fantasy-like quality, to a theory of mind. Cambridge, UK: Cambridge or, alternatively, they can be anxious ruminations University Press. that are distracting and distressing to the ­infatuated 844 Infatuation individual. Frequently, the character of these over time in most romantic relationships. There intrusive thoughts will ebb and flow, focusing at are several reasons for this decline. For one, rela- one moment on the possibility that one’s feelings tionships are initially exciting because people’s are reciprocated and the next moment on the pos- self-concepts expand to incorporate their romantic sibility that they are not. This volatility contrib- partners, but this excitement fades once the self- utes to the emotional turbulence experienced by expansion process runs to completion. In addition, infatuated individuals, who tend toward euphoria it takes a certain measure of anxiety and uncer- when the love object demonstrates romantic inter- tainty to maintain the infatuated state, and as time est in them and toward despair when the love passes, people typically accrue enough evidence to object is insufficiently responsive. Infatuated indi- confirm or refute the possibility that a love object viduals also commonly idealize the love object, desires the self in return. Tumultuous, off-again/ worshipping his or her positive qualities while on-again relationships that perpetuate confusion only indifferently acknowledging his or her nega- about romantic partners’ feelings and intentions tive qualities. Finally, infatuated individuals direct probably have the best likelihood of sustaining their passions toward only one potential partner. infatuation. (Of course, such relationships proba- Only rarely do individuals experience strong bly do a poor job of sustaining interpersonal trust infatuation toward multiple individuals, and, con- and security!) sequently, they yearn for their love object to ­reciprocate this exclusive desire. Although not all Conceptual Frameworks of these features are necessarily present in every infatuation, the more acute the infatuation, the Many social-psychological theories have explored more likely it is that these features will be present infatuation and related constructs. One relevant and pronounced. and well-known theory of love is Sternberg’s tri- Another important component of infatuation is angular theory. Sternberg proposes that love has sexual desire. In most cases, individuals become three components: passion, intimacy, and deci- infatuated with potential romantic partners who sion/commitment. The passion component refers are of the sex that they prefer romantically, and to the experience of arousal and sexual desire; the sexual fantasies are often present in infatuated intimacy component refers to feelings that pro- individuals’ persistent thoughts about their love mote closeness, bonding, and connectedness; and object. (Exceptions to these rules are also impor- the decision/commitment component refers to the tant in understanding the nature of infatuation and decision to love a particular individual and the are reviewed later.) In one study, participants commitment to maintain that love. Different types named people with whom they were currently “in of love emerge from different mixtures of any or love” and reported that, in 87 percent of the cases, all of these components, and each component may they also experienced sexual desire for these same be present in varying degrees. Sternberg suggests individuals. However, sexual contact is rarely the that infatuation is a kind of love that exists when central stated goal of an infatuation. Instead, only the passion component is present. That is, infatuated individuals long for moments of emo- individuals are infatuated when they experience tional union with the love object; sexual encoun- sexual desire and arousal for a particular roman- ters do not necessarily lead to emotional unions, tic interest, but they do not feel bonded to and and emotional connections can frequently be have not yet committed to the romantic interest. achieved through nonsexual means. Also, given That infatuation is derived mainly from passion is that people can feel sexual desire (but not infatua- consistent with the characterization of infatuation tion) for a number of different individuals at the as an immature kind of love that emerges early same time, sexual desire alone is insufficient to in a relationship, before any real intimacy or generate or sustain an infatuation. ­commitment has been achieved. Infatuation is more likely to emerge during the In contrast to Sternberg’s model, other theoreti- early stages of a romantic or potentially romantic cal perspectives suggest that the complete experi- relationship. But infatuation is unlikely to last for- ence of infatuation or passion does not emerge if ever: Such intense passion has a tendency to fade sexual desire is the only active motivation. Infatuation —845

Attachment theorists posit that the typical experi- Empirical and theoretical work that has explored ence of passionate love results from the activation the association between passion and intimacy also of both the sexual system and the attachment sys- sheds light on the nature of infatuation. Some theo- tem. Although sexual desire frequently accompa- rists have suggested that as romantic partners nies infatuation, as noted earlier, passion can ­accumulate knowledge about one another, passion emerge without sexual desire. For example, prepu- emerges as a result of such increases in intimacy. (In bescent children experience infatuations that evi- mathematical terms, passion is the first derivative of dence all of the adult features of passionate love, intimacy over time.) A wide array of research find- minus the sexual component. Attachment theorists ings lends support to this hypothesis. For example, propose that many features that are characteristic studies conducted by Arthur Aron and his col- of infatuation, such as the desire for emotional leagues have demonstrated that romantic partners closeness and concerns about reciprocation, stem experience an exhilarating expansion of the self as from the activation of the attachment system. Just they become more intimate, and this self-expansion as infants wish to be physically and emotionally process generates greater feelings of romantic close to an attachment figure, infatuated romantic ­passion. As a second example, one study required partners want to be physically and emotionally opposite-sex strangers to stare into each other’s close to each other. Some recent empirical findings eyes for 2 minutes—an intimacy-promoting activ- have suggested that the attachment system is an ity. After the staring task, these strangers reported integral part of the passionate experience; manipu- greater affection and passionate love for each lations designed to activate the attachment system another than did control participants who stared at (by triggering the experience of attachment anxiety) each other’s hands. Finally, research on individual with respect to a particular romantic interest have differences has found that extraverts tend to dis- the effect of boosting participants’ passionate love close more (compared with introverts) about them- for that romantic interest. Given the centrality of selves and therefore quickly develop intimacy with pair bonding as a mating strategy among humans, potential romantic partners. Not surprisingly, then, it makes evolutionary sense that initial romantic extraverts also report greater passionate feelings on attraction would emerge at the intersection of the average. All of these findings support the idea that sexual system, which governs the reproductive act, passion may emerge as intimacy increases. and the attachment system, which bonds reproduc- Taken together, the theoretical perspectives tive partners together for childrearing purposes. reviewed earlier paint a coherent picture of the Although attachment theory and the triangular time course of infatuation. First, infatuation is theory have somewhat conflicting perspectives, most likely to emerge early in a romantic relation- there are explanations for the existence of infatua- ship, as intimacy is just beginning to increase. Soon tion that draw from both theories. In the early thereafter, attachment theory predicts that infatu- stages of romantic relationships, infatuation is ated individuals will start to desire more intimacy pronounced, and romantic partners typically have and want to feel bonded to the love object. In cases not yet developed the intimacy and closeness that where both partners experience these feelings for they later achieve as the relationship matures. At each other, this will likely lead to a continued the same time, the desire to achieve a state of increase in intimacy, which in turn generates bondedness and intimacy may emerge early in a greater passion. As intimacy starts to reach an relationship. It is this desire for a bond with a par- upper limit (once romantic partners have gotten ticular partner that indicates the activation of the to know one another extremely well), then passion attachment system and is central to the experience is likely to decline. of infatuation. If the sexual system (i.e., the pas- sion component of the triangular theory) is acti- vated without this desire for an emotional bond Role of Arousal (i.e., desire for the intimacy component of the tri- angular theory), this will probably emerge as raw Some of the best empirical work on the experience sexual attraction, not infatuation or passionate of infatuation has demonstrated the importance of love per se. physiological arousal in stimulating passion. 846 Information Seeking

Berscheid and Walster’s two-factor theory of Further Readings romantic love predicts that passion is generated or Aron, A., Paris, M., & Aron, E. N. (1995). Falling in love: intensified when people (1) are aroused physiolog- Prospective studies of self-concept change. Journal of ically, and (2) believe that another person is the Personality and Social Psychology, 69, 1102–1112. cause of this arousal. The classic “love on a Baumeister, R. F., & Bratslavsky, E. (1999). Passion, bridge” study is the most vivid demonstration of intimacy, and time: Passionate love as a function of this point. In this study, male participants crossed change in intimacy. Personality and Social Psychology either a frightening, narrow bridge or a wide, Review, 3, 49–67. stable bridge and were greeted by an attractive Berscheid, E., & Walster, E. H. (1978). Interpersonal female experimenter on the other side. Men who attraction (2nd ed.). Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley. had just crossed the scary bridge (compared with Diamond, L. M. (2003). What does sexual orientation men who had crossed the stable bridge) were orient? A biobehavioral model distinguishing more likely to call the experimenter in the ensuing romantic love and sexual desire. Psychological days. In other words, as predicted by the Excitation Review, 110, 173–192. Transfer Theory, the men misattributed the source Dutton, D. G., & Aron, A. P. (1974). Some evidence for of their physiological arousal: They believed it heightened sexual attraction under conditions of high was the attractive female experimenter who caused anxiety. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, them to feel excited, and they experienced greater 30, 510–517. attraction to her as a result. Eastwick, P. W., & Finkel, E. J. (2008). The attachment Other experimental research has revealed simi- system in fledgling relationships: An activating role lar results. For example, participants who were for attachment anxiety. Journal of Personality and anticipating a shock or who just finished exercis- Social Psychology, 95, 628–647. ing reported greater attraction to an attractive Sternberg, R. J. (1986) A triangular theory of love. Psychological Review, 93, 119–135. romantic target than did control participants. In Tennov, D. (1979). Love and limerence. New York: fact, the valence of the arousal seems to matter Stein and Day. little because both positively (e.g., comedy) and negatively (e.g., horror) arousing material can increase passion for an attractive other. In the course of everyday life, the arousal that one n f o r m a t i o n e e k i n g believes to be caused by a potential romantic part- I S ner typically really is caused by that partner, and thus the romantic attraction that follows is the Researchers generally agree that individuals have result of an appropriate attribution. Nevertheless, a large appetite for information. Not surprisingly, these experimental misattribution studies were that appetite is often fed by information about essential to demonstrate the causal role that others with whom they have close relationships. arousal plays in the passionate experience. This entry begins with a summary of the breadth In summary, infatuation is a common experience of relational contexts in which information is in the opening stages of potential romantic relation- sought, discusses predictors of the information- ships, one that frequently proves both exciting and seeking process in close relationships, addresses terrifying. Infatuation has an important role in the biases that guide the search for information, dis- psychological study of attraction as its features, cusses consequences of the decision to seek infor- time course, and theoretical underpinnings reveal mation, and ends with a technological development much about the nature of human mating. that is changing the landscape of information seeking in close relationships. Paul W. Eastwick and Eli J. Finkel

See also Arousal and Attraction; Attachment Theory; Contexts of Information Seeking Attraction, Sexual; Excitation Transfer Theory; Falling in in Close Relationships Love; Initiation of Relationships; Interpersonal Attraction; Intimacy; Love, Companionate and Passionate; Gaining knowledge about someone is a necessary Misattribution of Arousal; Self-Expansion Model component of initiating a relationship with him or