The Michigan Review Page December 6, 2005 the Michigan Review the Campus Affairs Journal at the University of Michigan Volume XXIV, Number 6 December 6, 2005 MR
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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW Page December 6, 2005 THE MICHIGAN REVIEW The Campus Affairs Journal at the University of Michigan Volume XXIV, Number 6 December 6, 2005 MR DPS: What have you done for me lately? Cover Story.......................Page 3 Ludacris Losses................Page 5 Ailing Auto Industry.......Page 11 Editorials..........................Page 4 Columns...........................Page 6 Lassiter Interview...........Page 12 www.michiganreview.com THE MICHIGAN REVIEW Page 2 Serpent’s Tooth December 6, 2005 ■ The Serpent’s Tooth THE MICHIGAN REVIEW way mESSAgE OF the week: lion reward to the next person who kid- The Campus Affairs Journal of A“Ford Field looks like my fraternity naps a young, white female. Fox News Jewish groups demanded an apology the University of Michigan house after a party: It reeks of booze and Anchor greta Van Sustren has indicated from Michael Jackson last month after vomit, and everybody’s pissed because we she will take matters into her own hands he allegedly referred to Jews as “leech- James David Dickson didn’t score.” if needed. es” on an answering machine message. Editor in Chief Michael, sleeping with little boys is one The montreal gazette reports that Andre Last month’s election results yielded vic- thing, but when you start making fun of Paul Teske Boisclair, a gay Quebec politician, recent- tories by 18-year-olds in Michigan and the Jews… ly saw his approval rating among voters Iowa, an inmate in a California jail elected Publisher jump 11 points after he admitted using to a school board, and Kwame Kilpatrick. A member of Canada’s Parliament wants cocaine while serving in the provincial Democracy quickly surrendered. France to introduce legislation to prevent rapper Sekou Benson parliament. In other news, george W. did too. 50 Cent from touring north of the border. Managing Editor Bush has hastily scheduled visits to Co- Mr. Cent and his entourage responded by lombia and San Francisco next week. Asked for her sentiments regarding the outgunning the entire Canadian military Nick Cheolas recent Ludacris concert, one LSA Senior and occupying part of Ontario. Content Editor Blockbuster posted a $491 million loss told the michigan Daily, “You would in 2005. Executives were rumored to be usually think that Ludacris would be in A Canadian hockey coach has been fined considering dropping the policy by which Detroit or something. It showed the di- by Ontario Hockey Association for mak- Michael O’Brien customers don’t have to return the shit versity of the student government.” Uni- ing his players ride stationary bikes naked Campus Affairs Editor they borrow to the store. versity administrators proptly awarded while being paddled on the ass by hockey the student a full scholarship for the most sticks. Lloyd Carr called the strategy “tre- ASSISTANT EDITORS: The Michigan Daily reported the MSA awkward use of the word “diversity” in mendous,” and plans to implement it as Chris Stieber, Tomiyo Turner President Jesse Levine was disappointed a sentence that makes no sense whatso- soon as he finds a substitute for hockey that Ludacris failed to talk about social ever. sticks and a solution to avoid seeing gar- STAFF: justice after his concert. According to rett Rivas’s ass. Brian Biglin, Karen Boore, Rebecca inside sources, Ludacris told Levine to The fact that the Ludacris concert lost Christy, Tom Church, Jane Coaston, F*ck off unless Levine could find him a $20,000 was an “unqualified success” ac- Russian news outlets recently reported Stephen Crabtree, Jay Dickinson, Blake 734 hoe. cording to mSA President Jesse Levine. that a male lion set a record by engaging Emerson, Aaron Kaplan, Kole Kurti, In other news, Levine announced he has in sexual intercourse 86 times in 24 hours. Jeremy Linden, Frank Manley, Brian The Stranger, a Seattle newspaper, re- been hired as the new CEO of Enron, Alpha Epsilon Phi vowed to regain their McNally, David Millikan, Amanda vealed that Tulane University students, re- stating that the corporation made him a title. Nichols, Adam Paul, Danielle Putnam, located in Washington, are spending their slightly better offer than Worldcom. Yevgeny Shrago FEMA money on pot, bongs, and beer. In response to student group allegations Traditional fiscally conservative Libertar- Dave Marshall, Deputy Minister of that numerous hate crimes on campus go Editor Emeritus: Michael J. Phillips ians nationwide have ironically supported Canada’s Department of Public Works, unreported, University Vice President for this FEMA program, and called for its has issued a ban on the hiring of Cau- Student Affairs E. Royster Harper has The Michigan Review is the independent, student- expansion. casians for five months – a legal policy announced the University will launch a run journal of conservative and libertarian opinion under Canda’s “Charter of Rights and website and hotline designed to facilitate at the University of Michigan. We neither solicit nor accept monetary donations from the University. Con- Following the safe returns of a missing Freedoms,” which permits discrimination the reporting of these crimes. Some of tributions to The Michigan Review are tax-deductible 17-year-old exchange student from Or- to promote “disadvantaged” groups. In the early responses include “I saw a black under section 501 (c)(3) of the Internal Revenue Ser- egon and a 14-year-old Pennsylvania girl other news, the University of Michigan is guy eating a cracker” and “my Cheeto vice Code. The Michigan Review is not affiliated with last month, furious news organizations currently studying the feasability of mov- looked like a swastika.” any political party or any university political group. around the nation have offered a $10 mil- ing its entire campus to Toronto. Unsigned editorials represent the opinion of the editorial board. Ergo, they are unequivocally correct ■ Letter to the Editor and just. Signed articles, letters, and cartoons rep- resent the opinions of the author, and not necessar- IR: IN (A DISCOURSE on Intelligent Design, 10/25), you ceptance of the paradigm of natural selection among all but ily those of The Review. The Serpent’s Tooth shall Sfundamentally misunderstand the criticism of both (1) the a tiny minority. It is a fact that the proportion of the world’s represent the opinion of individual, anonymous push for acceptance within the scientific community, and (2) the scientists who take the ID hypothesis as a plausible critique of contributors to The Review, and should not neces- sarily be taken as representative of The Review’s push to have it taught in school. evolutionary biology is arbitrarily small. editorial stance. The opinions expressed in this What I see as the main criticism of (1), is that the fun- Your misunderstanding can probably be traced to publication do not necessarily those of the advertis- damental hypothesis is a departure from a core scientific princi- your assertion that “how someone interprets scientific data is ers, or of the University of Michigan. We welcome ple, to seek a naturalistic explanation for observed phenomena. a choice.” Indeed that is a choice for a professional data inter- letters, articles, and comments about the journal. It is unequivocal that the ID hypothesis posits a SUPER-natu- preter but it is a choice which must CONVINCE HER FEL- Please address all advertising, subscription inquiries, ralistic explanation. This is not to say that a fundamental im- LOW SCIENTISTS. Students should NOT be denied an inter- and donations to “Publisher,” c/o The Michigan Review: plicit hypothesis of any ‘scientific’ study is atheism, but wher- pretation of data that has been crafted, critiqued, and refined by ever one departs from the search for a naturalistic explanation hundreds of thousands of scientists. The high school science Editorial and Business Offices: The Michigan Review of observed phenomena -- one departs from scientific inquiry. classroom is simply not the place for ID until that idea has sewn 911 N. University Avenue, Suite One But there are certainly more ways of knowing than the scientific substantial and genuine debate among professional scientists. Ann Arbor, MI 48109-1265 method. The second reason that goes back to the critique of mrev @ umich.edu www.michiganreview.com As for (2), there are two reasons to exclude an agnostic (1) is since ID is not science, it does belong in the science class- approach in a classroom. room. If it belonged in high school at all, it might belong in a Copyright © 2005, The Michigan Review, Inc. All First, not only do we, in education, seek to understand social studies, religious studies, or science-in-society class. rights reserved. The Michigan Review is a member the world better (which would mitigate for allowing controversy of the Collegiate Network. and creative interpretations of data), but we also seek to dis- Respectfully Yours, seminate knowledge discovered by professional academic re- searchers to the public. When you say that to disallow ID from Michael Aylward high school classrooms is to “censor the public discourse for Doctoral pre-Candidate in Economics [email protected] ‘acceptable’ ideas to be taught,” you VASTLY undersell the ac- Reader in Complex Systems THE MICHIGAN REVIEW Page 3 Campus Affairs December 6, 2005 Popped-Collar Crime Where do DPS’s priorities lie? BY ADAM PAUL, ‘08 Data from DPS and the AAPD revenues between the state, the city and than true prevention. While DPS does do HIS SEmESTER HAS seen a num- both indicate an increase in crime but itself. It would seem that even though the some direct information offerings such Tber of high profile crimes on and provide divergent results concerning po- city has more money to earn from giving as a new video shown to parents and stu- around campus. Incidents have ranged lice control over partying. DPS publishes simple citations it has chosen to put its dents at all this summer’s orientation ses- from a non-fatal shooting at an off- material annually about crime on campus resources toward different purposes.