The Wind in the Willows

DRAMATIZED BY

JOSEPH BALDWIN

THE DRAMAT'IC PUBLISHING COMPAl\TY

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"Produced by special arrangement with THE DRAMATIC PUBUSHING COMPANY of Woodstock, Illinois"

. ~MCMLXVI by THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY

Printed in the United States of America -AU Rights Reserved (THE WIND IN THE WILLOWS)

ISBN 0-87129-160-6

A Play in Two Acts

For Seventeen Characters

CHARACTERS

MR. MOLE a small friendly animal MR. RAT a water-rat, resident of the river bank MR. BADGER.... .venerable and respected resident of the Wild Wood MR. TOAD English country gentleman, owner of Toad Hall JACK WEASEL a disreputable fellow JEN WEASEL his wife TOM WEASEL a young weasel TILLY WEASEL his, wife MRS. OTTER a widow residing on the river bank PORTLY OTTER very young son of Mrs. otter CHAUFFEUR driver for His Lordship and Her Ladyship POLICEMAN...... a rural constable JAILER keeper of the dungeon PENELOPE the jailer's pretty daughter BILL a locomotive fireman ALF the engine -driver WEASEL COOK employee of the weasels

EXTRAS: Offstage voices, such as those ofthe Prisoners in the dungeon and the Weasels carousing at their banquet. 3

PLACE: The English countryside,. in and about Toad Hall, the Wild Wood, and the Castle (dungeon).

Before the curtain rises there is flute mu sic, as if Pan himself were playing, and as the curtain rises, bird calls are heard. The scene is the neighborhood of Toad Hall. If convenient, there may be a weeping wil low tree painted on the backdrop (remem bering thaton the stage it is outline rather than detail that counts). On the side wings, portions of willows and/or shadows of wil lows may be painted. If desired there may be a small, real or artificial willow tree. Toad Hall may be merely some impressive chimney-tops above the willow tree painted on flats or a backdrop, or an actual stage setting. A small sign reading: TOAD HALL PRIVATE PROPERTY KEEP OFF TIllS MEANS YOU! should be appropriately located. A point er should indicate the direction to Wild Wood. A few pieces of lawn furniture are desirable, including a bench. MOLE and RAT enter R, having presum ably just landed at Toad's dock.

MOLE What a wonderful day for a trip on the river! I'm deeply grateful to you, Mr. Rat. 5

MOLE Thanks-- Ratty. (Anxiously) You're sure Mr.. ·-Toad won't mind your bringing me along? RAT Toad mind? He's always glad to show off Toad Hall and there it is, in all its glory. (Gestures largely)

MOLE (Leaning his head back) But I can only see the chimney-tops. And how many there are! It's a palace! Mr. Toad must be very rich! RAT Rich--and foolish. Always some new fad! Now he's throwing away his money on cars! MOLE (Worried) Do you mean he might even lose this beautiful home?

RAT That~ s exactly what I mean. (Pulls folded newspaper from his pocket and gives it to MOLE) This was in last week's paper.. (As MOLE takes it) Go ahead. Read it.

MOLE (Reading)

"Toad in hospital--car a total loss! ff Oh, my!

RAT Read on.

MOLE "Toad demolishes bakery van. Police charges Toad with being an incompetent driver! Magistrate fines Toad!"

RAT (Extending his hand for the paper) That's enough. That tells the story.

MOLE But shouldn't somebody do something?

RAT Of course. That's why we're here. We're meeting Badger.

MOLE (Impressed) Mr .. Badger of Wild Wood?

RAT The same. He knew Toad's father and he's worried, too! And, if I'm not mistaken, there he comes.

MOLE There's someone with him. Following along behind--

RAT (Peering) By George, there is someone! MOLE A very small person.

RAT Old Badger doesn't know he's there. Now we'll have some fun! (Moves forward and greets Badger) Isn't this a long walk for you--all the way from the Wild Wood?

(BADGER enters, carrying a thorny walk ing-stick. Trailing BADGER is PORTLY, the young otter, whom BADGER has not seen)

BADGER Well you may ask, my young friend. I'm pretty well winded. (Flops into a chair, breathing hard. PORT LY moves over behind Badger's chair)

RAT Who's this fine, strapping young fellow you have with you? (Indicates PORTLY, who backs away. BADGER turns, then rises with an excla mation)

BADGER Portly Otter! And I gave you a penny to go home! (PORTLY scuffs his foot and hangs his head. BADGER turns to the others) Always tagging along where he isn't wanted! (To PORTLY) Off with you, my lad. (Turns PORTLY R) Off. Off. Go home! (PORTLY doesn't budge) RAT Try him with another penny, Badger.

© The Dramatic Publishing Company, Woodstock, Illinois Act I The Wind in the Willows Page 9 BADGER That's encouraging him! (A struggle within himself) Well--yes. Here, you little rascal! Now be off! (Gives the penny to PORTLY, who pockets it, backs away and then lingers unnoticed)

MOLE He didn't even say thank you. (Makes a tsk-tsk sound of disapproval) BADGER (Returning to his chair) Oh, he's completely spoiled. No discipline. LetMrs. Otter turn her back and off he goes! (PORTLY crosses to RAT and touches his sleeve)

PORTLY Go with you?

RAT (Sharply) Kid, you're a complete nuisance. Now clear out!

(MRS. OTTER enters R)

MRS. OTTER (Approaching others) Have you seen--- (Sees PORTLY) Oh, there you are! Mama was worried! (Takes his hand and turns to the others) It's good of you to take Portly about with you so much. RAT Well--actually---

MOLE (Speaking almost at the same time) The fact is----

MRS. OTTER (Puzzled) What are you talking about?

RAT We sometimes wonder why the kid doesn't stay home and play with his friends.

MRSo OTTER But Portly hasn't any friends. There aren't any children his age around.

MOLE Doesn't he have chores to do around home?

MRS. OTTER (Stiffly) I'll see he doesn't bother you in the future. Come along, Portly. Good day, gentlemen.

MOLE We didn't exactly mean--- (MRS. OTTER and PORTLY eXit) Oh, dear!

RAT But we do exactly mean. The kid's a nuisance.

MOLE He's cute, too--sort of. BADGER At least, we don't have to drag him along with us

RAT (To BADGER) Are you sure he's home?

BADGER He said he'd be, when he invited us. (Striking the ground with his stick) I consider it reasonable to expect him there. (Offstage R we hear the sound of an auto horn: "Poop-poop! tt)

MOLE What sound is that? (The horn sounds again, and we hear the car. The animals leap upon the bench to get a view of the road. RAT is up first)

RAT It's roaring down the road!

MOLE There's a cloud of dust!

RAT It's a red car! Coming full speed!

BADGER Look at the cows gallop!

MOLE The driver's waving his cap! Yeah! (Waves his own cap)

BADGER (Peering)

Could it be---- Oh, no! (Covers his eyes)

RAT It's Toad! BADGER Too fast! Reckless! (The poop-poop of the horn is heard. All turn their heads from R to L as the car seemingly dashes past) MOLE My, it's a grand car! RAT (Excited) He's not slowing for the turn! BADGER He's looking back and waving----

RAT (Shouting) Toad! Look ahead, you idiot!

BADGER Too late! (A loud crash off L) MOLE (Covering his eyes) I can't look.

BADGER Ah!

RAT The car's flipping over---

MOLE (Who has uncovered his eyes) Look at him sail!

RAT Into the haystack!

BADGER Fool's luck! (Starts for the gate) Come, let's help the poor lad.

RAT The carts smashed.

MOLE (Mournfully) It was so beautiful.

(BADGER and RAT exit. We hear them calling to TOAD. After a moment's hes itation, MOLE also rushes out. In just a moment, the group returns, MOLE and RAT supporting the somewhatbreathless MR. TOAD, BADGER hobbling alongbe hind, anxious about his friend's condition. TOAD is dressed in cap, goggles, motor ing coat, etc., and still grasps the steer ing wheel in his hand. A bit of the steer ing column remains, to which is attached a horn with a bulb) TOAD (Somewhat dazed, but elated) Stopped her at last! Hooray!

RAT (Ruefully, looking off)

That's the last of that car. Itts a wonder you lived.

TOAD The trick is to leap at the right moment. Did you see me leap?

RAT I did.

TOAD The next car I buy, I shall learn, first off, how to stop her. BADGER The next car? (Muttering) This is what I feared!

TOAD Ratty, Badger, my best friends--- (Pauses, as he sees MOLE clearly)

RAT (Quick to make introductions) Mr. Mole--Mr. Toad.

TOAD (Pumping Mole's hand) Welcome to Toad Hall!

MOLE (Much impressed) Mr. Toad.

TOAD (To the group) How about a cool drink? Such luck you all happened

RAT Don't you remember you invited us to come?

TOAD (Laughing) Oh, yes--so I did, so I did!

BADGER He's dazed.

RAT (Taking Toad's arm and leading him to a chair) Sit quiet a bit, Toady. TOAD Yes, I wanted you all here. For I've discovered the true purpose of life! Cars! (MOLE helps RAT seat TOAD)

BADGER (staring gloomily toward the road) You'll never drive this one again. And the money lost! (Throws up his hands in despair)

TOAD Pooh! What's money? I shall simply ring up for another car. (Tugs Rat's sleeve) Ah, Ratty, this is really living! (Presses the horn-bulb: "poop-poop! ft) The open road, the dusty highway, fields and parks, towns and cities! Here today, gone tomorrow! Travel, change, excitement!