A Social Statement on Human Sexuality: Gift and Trust
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Habits for Relationship Success Dr. Sara Schwarzbaum
Habits for Relationship Success Dr. Sara Schwarzbaum © 2019 by Dr. Sara Schwarzbaum 1 Habits for Relationship Success Dr. Sara Schwarzbaum TABLE OF CONTENTS INTRODUCTION ..................................................................4 BONUS CHAPTER: WHAT IS LOVE .................................................5 HABIT 1: PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR RELATIONSHIP ..............................7 EXERCISE 1: CREATE A RELATIONSHIP VISION ...................................9 HABIT 2: SHOW YOU CARE .......................................................12 EXERCISE 2: CREATE A LIST OF CARING ACTIVITIES .............................14 HABIT 3: DISTINGUISH BETWEEN SEX AND TOUCH ..............................17 EXERCISE 3: GET BACK IN THE SANDBOX ........................................20 HABIT 4: RECOGNIZE DIFFERENT TYPES OF INTIMACY .........................23 EXERCISE 4: RECOGNIZE AND RESPOND TO “BIDS FOR CONNECTION” ..........25 HABIT 5: LET’S TALK ABOUT SEX .................................................27 EXERCISE 5: TALK ABOUT SEX. PLAN FOR SEX. PREPARE FOR SEX. ................29 HABIT 6: BEFORE THE FIGHT - HOW AND WHEN TO INTERACT ..................30 EXERCISE 6: PREPARE FOR A DIFFICULT CONVERSATION ........................32 HABIT 7: AFTER THE FIGHT - REPAIR AND TALK ................................35 EXERCISE 7: PREPARE TO REPAIR AND TALK AFTER THE FIGHT ..................36 CONCLUSION ...................................................................37 © 2019 by Dr. Sara Schwarzbaum 2 Habits for Relationship Success Dr. Sara Schwarzbaum -
Incest Avoidance and Prohibition: Psychobiological and Cultural Factors
Psicologia USP http://dx.doi.org/10.1590/0103-656420160050 287 Evitação e proibição do incesto: fatores psicobiológicos e culturais Francisco Wilson Nogueira Holanda Júnior* Universidade Federal do Rio Grande do Norte, Programa de Pós-Graduação em Psicologia. Natal, RN, Brasil Resumo: Embora historicamente a regulação proibitiva do incesto seja considerada um fenômeno cultural quase universal que não é influenciado por fatores psicobiológicos relativos à história evolutiva da espécie humana, evidências recentes têm questionado essa visão tradicional e defendido que a evitação e a proibição do incesto são influenciadas biológica e cognitivamente com a cultura. Este artigo objetiva desenvolver uma discussão teórica acerca da inibição e proibição do incesto, enfatizando os mecanismos evolutivos subjacentes a esses fenômenos. Argumenta-se a existência de mecanismos endógenos que evoluíram porque inibem a atividade sexual entre parentes próximos e que formam a base para regular socialmente a proibição do incesto (mecanismo exógeno). Destaca-se o efeito Westermarck, no qual a proximidade de pessoas que vivem juntas desde a infância provoca uma aversão ao intercurso sexual entre elas. A ausência de propensão ao incesto e sua proibição institucional constituem uma complexa integração entre fatores psicobiológicos e culturais. Palavras-chave: incesto, evitação, proibição, evolução. Introdução por ≥50% dos casamentos consanguíneos nessas popula- ções (Zlotogora, Hujerat, Barges, Shalev, & Chakravarti, O incesto é definido como a prática de relação 2007). Os casamentos consanguíneos de segundo e ter- sexual entre pessoas com graus próximos de parentesco, o ceiro graus oferecem vantagens, como fortalecimento dos qual pode ser de curto ou longo prazo, com ou sem geração laços e relações familiares, garantia de saber da história de de filhos (Lumsden & Wilson, 1980; Read, 2014; Tidefors, vida do cônjuge antes do casamento, facilidade de acertar Arvidsson, Ingevaldson, & Larsson, 2010). -
Consensual Non-Monogamy and the New Sexual Ethos
University of Pennsylvania ScholarlyCommons Publicly Accessible Penn Dissertations 2012 The Casualization of Intimacy: Consensual Non-Monogamy and the New Sexual Ethos Brittany Griebling University of Pennsylvania, [email protected] Follow this and additional works at: https://repository.upenn.edu/edissertations Part of the Communication Commons, and the Feminist, Gender, and Sexuality Studies Commons Recommended Citation Griebling, Brittany, "The Casualization of Intimacy: Consensual Non-Monogamy and the New Sexual Ethos" (2012). Publicly Accessible Penn Dissertations. 638. https://repository.upenn.edu/edissertations/638 This paper is posted at ScholarlyCommons. https://repository.upenn.edu/edissertations/638 For more information, please contact [email protected]. The Casualization of Intimacy: Consensual Non-Monogamy and the New Sexual Ethos Abstract This dissertation explores the discursive construction of consensually non-monogamous (CNM) relationships. The focus is limited to non-monogamists involved in primary, committed dyadic relationships who also pursue secondary, more casual partners. Using the framework of "casualization," the dissertation carries out a discourse analysis of 25 in-depth interviews with straight and LGBT individuals and couples involved in CNM relationships. The term casualization of intimacy makes an analogy between the evolving norms of private life and the casualization of labor. For scholars of work in a global economy, the casualization of labor refers to decreasing job security for workers, coupled with increasing productivity and the demand for new skills. The casualization of intimacy means that our personal lives, like our work lives, are characterized by precarity, the need for flexibility, the feminization of communication, and the valorization of individual "hard work." Analysis of interviews with non- monogamists demonstrates a construction of CNM in line with casualization. -
Erotica Menu: Ideas for Alternatives to Traditional
OHSU Program in Vulvar Health Erotica Menu Suggestions for Exploring Intimacy Without Pain Vulvar and vulvovaginal pain affect each woman and her sexuality differently. Some of you have not been able to feel or behave sexually for some time, and you may fear that you have lost your ability to do so. Part of your recovery from your pain is to (re)build your sexual and relationship confidence. We therefore encourage you to consider the kinds of relationship activities and ideas below as part of your treatment for your vulvar symptoms. Vaginal and penetrative intercourse is only one way of being sexual. And, although it is the behavior that most of us consider to be “having sex,” it is often not the most sexually gratifying activity for women. When you have vulvar pain, intercourse can become impossible. Although facing this can be difficult, it can also be an excellent opportunity for women and couples to find out what else they might like to do together that can help them to restore and/or maintain sexual and physical intimacy in their relationship. And for those of you not in relationships, it can be a time to learn a lot about what your own body enjoys and desires. In the spirit of exploration and pleasure enhancement for you and your partner (if you have one), we offer the following “menu.” Some of these activities are genitally/sexually focused, others are not. Please use them as guides and experiments. The list is not exhaustive and we encourage you to use the books, websites and other resources contained in these suggestions in order to further your own sexual research. -
Swinging High Or Low? Measuring Self-Esteem in Swingers
G Model SOCSCI-1537; No. of Pages 8 ARTICLE IN PRESS The Social Science Journal xxx (2018) xxx–xxx Contents lists available at ScienceDirect The Social Science Journal journal homepage: www.elsevier.com/locate/soscij Swinging high or low? Measuring self-esteem in swingers ∗ Amanda S. Ruzansky, Marissa A. Harrison Psychology Program, Penn State Harrisburg, PA, USA a r t i c l e i n f o a b s t r a c t Article history: This study sought to examine the self-esteem of individuals involved in a consensually Received 30 May 2017 non-monogamous relationship, the swinging lifestyle. Utilizing the Rosenberg Self-Esteem Received in revised form 17 October 2018 Scale, the self-esteem of swingers was quantified and compared to a general sample. The Accepted 19 October 2018 results reveal that swingers have higher self-esteem. However, gender differences emerged Available online xxx in post hoc analyses whereby men who engage in swinging have higher self-esteem, but women who engage in swinging have self-esteem comparable to others. Results are dis- Keywords: cussed in terms of evolutionary and clinical importance. Limitations and future directions Swinging are also discussed. The lifestyle Self-esteem © 2018 Published by Elsevier Inc. on behalf of Western Social Science Association. Sex differences CNM Evolutionary 1. Introduction In fact, there is evidence to suggest that those in CNMs may have increased positive traits. Kimberly and Hans Frequently in our social world when people hear of (2017) interviewed 16 married heterosexual couples who individuals or couples who engage in consensual non- engaged in swinging. -
Chapter 1: Introduction to Human Sexuality
CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION TO HUMAN SEXUALITY Sexuality is an essential and integral part of all stages of human life, yet the topic is still taboo in almost every country. Talking openly about sexuality is crucial for understanding sexual behavior, the growth and development of our bodies, how we experience our gender roles, what constitutes a healthy relationship, how to have children when and if we want to, how to communicate with our intimate partners, and how to prevent health problems and unwanted pregnancies. Opening lessons should provide young people with both the words and the com- fort to talk about sexuality so they will participate more actively in class and, more important, so they will begin to develop skills for lifelong communication with parents, partners, health care providers, and, eventually, their own children. Opening lessons should also address val- ues, though discussion of values will be relevant in many other topics. Although values are subjective and cannot be taught, sexuality educators can guide students to examine and clarify their own values and recognize how they powerfully influence behavior. Teaching Tips • Make sure you are comfortable talking about sexuality. This is especially important in your first interactions with participants, as these sessions set the tone for the rest of the course. • Spend time on introductory activities, warm-ups, and games if your participants are very shy. Consider discussing directly what gets in the way of talking openly and which topics are especially difficult. • Have participants agree on a small set of classroom rules, such as listening and respect for others. These rules can be referenced if violations occur. -
Sex in Its Daily Relational Context
RUNNING HEAD: SEX AND DIARY 1 Sex in its daily relational context RUNNING HEAD: SEX AND DIARY 2 Introduction. The present study measured the daily correlates of sexual behavior in an ecologically valid context by relying on a daily diary approach. Aim. Examining the dyadic and multicomponent nature of sexual behavior is essential to create valid models of sexual responding that are better aligned with the day-to-day context of having sex in a relationship. Method and Main Outcome Measures. During three weeks, heterosexual couples completed, two times a day, an electronic diary to report on mood, own and perceived partner behavior, relational feelings (in the evening), sexual activity, physical intimacy, and masturbation (in the morning). This design allowed testing bidirectional temporal associations between daily context and different types of sexual behavior. Results. Positive mood, displays of positive partner behavior, perceived positive partner behavior, and positive relational feelings predicted more sexual activity and intimacy in men, which then further increased their positive mood, perceived positive partner behavior, and positive feelings about the relationship on the following day. Women showed a similar pattern of predictors regarding sexual activity as men, though the effect of sexual behavior on next-day feelings and behavior was more relationship-oriented rather than affecting personal mood. Intimacy was related to almost all daily variables in women, but related only to own and perceived positive partner behavior and positive relational feelings the next day. Several partner effects also reached significance and these were more influential in predicting male than female intimacy. Solitary sexual activity showed a different pattern of results than dyadic sexual activity, with men experiencing masturbation as negatively in the context of their relationship. -
1 Introducing LGBTQ Psychology
1 Introducing LGBTQ psychology Overview * What is LGBTQ psychology and why study it? * The scientific study of sexuality and ‘gender ambiguity’ * The historical emergence of ‘gay affirmative’ psychology * Struggling for professional recognition and challenging heteronormativity in psychology What is LGBTQ psychology and why study it? For many people it is not immediately obvious what lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans and queer (LGBTQ) psychology is (see the glossary for defini- tions of words in bold type). Is it a grouping for LGBTQ people working in psychology? Is it a branch of psychology about LGBTQ people? Although LGBTQ psychology is often assumed to be a support group for LGBTQ people working in psychology, it is in fact the latter: a branch of psychology concerned with the lives and experiences of LGBTQ people. Sometimes it is suggested that this area of psychology would be more accurately named the ‘psychology of sexuality’. Although LGBTQ psychology is concerned with sexuality, it has a much broader focus, examining many different aspects of the lives of LGBTQ people including prejudice and discrimination, parenting and families, and com- ing out and identity development. One question we’re often asked is ‘why do we need a separate branch of psychology for LGBTQ people?’ There are two main reasons for this: first, as we discuss in more detail below, until relatively recently most psychologists (and professionals in related disciplines such as psychiatry) supported the view that homosexuality was a mental illness. ‘Gay affirmative’ psychology, as this area was first known in the 1970s, developed to challenge this perspective and show that homosexuals are psychologically healthy, ‘normal’ individuals. -
Running Head: COMMUNICATION in POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIPS 1
Running head: COMMUNICATION IN POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIPS 1 How Communication is Used in Polyamorous Relationships Meghan Wallace A thesis submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Master of Counselling City University of Seattle 2019 APPROVED BY Colin James Sanders, MA, RCC, PhD, Advisor, Counselling Psychology Faculty Christopher Kinman, MA, RCC, PhD (Candidate), Faculty Reader, Counselling Psychology Faculty Division of Arts and Sciences COMMUNICATION IN POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIPS 2 A Phenomenological Study of the Use of Communication to Maintain a Polyamorous Relationship Meghan Wallace City University of Seattle COMMUNICATION IN POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIPS 3 Table of Contents Table of Contents ................................................................................................................. 3 Abstract................................................................................................................................ 4 Acknowledgements ............................................................................................................... 5 Chapter One: Introduction .................................................................................................. 6 Nature of the Study .......................................................................................................................7 Scholarly Context .........................................................................................................................8 Definitions ................................................................................................................................. -
Sexuality Across the Lifespan Childhood and Adolescence Introduction
Topics in Human Sexuality: Sexuality Across the Lifespan Childhood and Adolescence Introduction Take a moment to think about your first sexual experience. Perhaps it was “playing doctor” or “show me yours and I’ll show you mine.” Many of us do not think of childhood as a time of emerging sexuality, although we likely think of adolescence in just that way. Human sexual development is a process that occurs throughout the lifespan. There are important biological and psychological aspects of sexuality that differ in children and adolescents, and later in adults and the elderly. This course will review the development of sexuality using a lifespan perspective. It will focus on sexuality in infancy, childhood and adolescence. It will discuss biological and psychological milestones as well as theories of attachment and psychosexual development. Educational Objectives 1. Describe Freud’s theory of psychosexual development 2. Discuss sexuality in children from birth to age two 3. Describe the development of attachment bonds and its relationship to sexuality 4. Describe early childhood experiences of sexual behavior and how the child’s natural sense of curiosity leads to sexual development 5. Discuss common types of sexual play in early childhood, including what is normative 6. Discuss why it is now thought that the idea of a latency period of sexual development is inaccurate 7. Discuss differences in masturbation during adolescence for males and females 8. List and define the stages of Troiden’s model for development of gay identity 9. Discuss issues related to the first sexual experience 10. Discuss teen pregnancy Freud’s Contributions to Our Understanding of Sexual Development Prior to 1890, it was widely thought that sexuality began at puberty. -
Growing Husband and Wife Physical Intimacy
Physical Intimacy Homework Growing Husband and Wife Physical Intimacy Suggested Guidelines - Move through each stage of Physical Touch in order, over a week to two week period as your schedule allows. Make appointments with each other if necessary to ensure follow through. - After completing all five stages, jointly make a life time commitment to continually work on growing your physical intimacy through physical touch. - Healthy Physical Intimacy means both spouses can say “no” or “stop” for any reason and they trust their partner will honor their request. - If health issues are a concern or limiting, practice the stages that work for your life stage. - Please consider seeking professional counseling or visit with your personal physician if you find it difficult to successfully complete these exercises. 1. Innocent Touch - Go for a long walk holding hands or arm in arm. No electronic devices. - Or sit on the couch cuddling for 30-40 minutes. All electronics off except music if desired. - Or find a corner spot in your favorite diner and sit as close as you can, appropriate for public but as if you are the only two present. All electronics off. - Or in bed, night attire on, cuddle in a spooning position for 30 – 40 minutes. All electronics off except for music if desired. - Or, do all four as time allows! 5 Things Verbal Exercise options while enjoying Innocent Touch (Take turns) - 5 things you are grateful for in your life - 5 things you love about your partner - 5 things you would love to do with your partner in your lifetime or this year or you pick the time frame. -
Compulsory Monogamy and Polyamorous Existence Elizabeth Emens
University of Chicago Law School Chicago Unbound Public Law and Legal Theory Working Papers Working Papers 2004 Monogamy's Law: Compulsory Monogamy and Polyamorous Existence Elizabeth Emens Follow this and additional works at: https://chicagounbound.uchicago.edu/ public_law_and_legal_theory Part of the Law Commons Chicago Unbound includes both works in progress and final versions of articles. Please be aware that a more recent version of this article may be available on Chicago Unbound, SSRN or elsewhere. Recommended Citation Elizabeth Emens, "Monogamy's Law: Compulsory Monogamy and Polyamorous Existence" (University of Chicago Public Law & Legal Theory Working Paper No. 58, 2004). This Working Paper is brought to you for free and open access by the Working Papers at Chicago Unbound. It has been accepted for inclusion in Public Law and Legal Theory Working Papers by an authorized administrator of Chicago Unbound. For more information, please contact [email protected]. CHICAGO PUBLIC LAW AND LEGAL THEORY WORKING PAPER NO. 58 MONOGAMY’S LAW: COMPULSORY MONOGAMY AND POLYAMOROUS EXISTENCE Elizabeth F. Emens THE LAW SCHOOL THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO February 2003 This paper can be downloaded without charge at http://www.law.uchicago.edu/academics/publiclaw/index.html and at The Social Science Research Network Electronic Paper Collection: http://ssrn.com/abstract_id=506242 1 MONOGAMY’S LAW: COMPULSORY MONOGAMY AND POLYAMOROUS EXISTENCE 29 N.Y.U. REVIEW OF LAW & SOCIAL CHANGE (forthcoming 2004) Elizabeth F. Emens† Work-in-progress: Please do not cite or quote without the author’s permission. I. INTRODUCTION II. COMPULSORY MONOGAMY A. MONOGAMY’S MANDATE 1. THE WESTERN ROMANCE TRADITION 2.