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Razorcake Issue #09 PO Box 42129, Los Angeles, CA 90042 www.razorcake.com #9 know I’m supposed to be jaded. I’ve been hanging around girl found out that the show we’d booked in her town was in a punk rock for so long. I’ve seen so many shows. I’ve bar and she and her friends couldn’t get in, she set up a IIwatched so many bands and fads and zines and people second, all-ages show for us in her town. In fact, everywhere come and go. I’m now at that point in my life where a lot of I went, people were taking matters into their own hands. They kids at all-ages shows really are half my age. By all rights, were setting up independent bookstores and info shops and art it’s time for me to start acting like a grumpy old man, declare galleries and zine libraries and makeshift venues. Every town punk rock dead, and start whining about how bands today are I went to inspired me a little more. just second-rate knock-offs of the bands that I grew up loving. hen, I thought about all these books about punk rock Hell, I should be writing stories about “back in the day” for that have been coming out lately, and about all the jaded Spin by now. But, somehow, the requisite feelings of being TTold guys talking about how things were more vital back jaded are eluding me. In fact, I’m downright optimistic. in the day. But I remember a lot of those days and that “How can this be?” you ask. overwhelming feeling that there was no future, nothing left to ell, after we mailed out the last issue of Razorcake, I do but get fucked up and dance on the ruins of society. When went on a spoken word tour to support my new I compare that to now, where people are actually working WW book. While I was on that tour, I saw some towards the future and struggling in their own ways to make incredible things. I saw a handful of high school kids in rural the world a better place, I feel like the DIY culture is more Pennsylvania who wanted a place to skate, so they put on a vital now than it’s ever been. huge punk show, drawing a couple hundred kids and raising a got home from that tour inspired by all these kids and all bunch of money for their town to build a skate park. I hung the things they were doing themselves. I couldn’t wait to out with a kid who turned his mom’s East Texas blues bar into IIteam up with Todd and the rest of the Razorcakers and a cool punk rock venue. I saw a twenty-two year old become work, in our own way, towards producing something cool. a de facto patron of the arts by turning the courtyard in front So, in that vein, here’s the latest issue of Razorcake, our little of his apartment into a space where local artists and attempt to make the world – or at least your bathroom – a performers could do their thing. After an eighteen year-old better place. --Sean AD DEADLINE FOR ISSUE #10 • We will not accept electronic ad files. August 1st, 2002 Hard copy only. EMAIL OR MAIL US • Send good laser prints for the ads. Use FOR THE RATES solely black ink on all art. Do not output your ad on a bubble jet printer even if it AD SIZES looks black and white. It will reproduce • Full page, 7.5” wide, 10” tall. like complete shit when it goes to an offset • Half page, 7.5” wide, 5” tall. printer. • Quarter page, 3.75” wide, 5” tall. • Only for full-page ads, we'll accept • Sixth page, 2.5” wide, 5” tall. film. Positive stats, RRED (right-reading, emulsion side down) only. • Please make all checks out to Razorcake. • All photos must be halftoned using a 85 LPI (85 line screen). ADVERTISING STIPULATIONS • If you feel the need for us to invoice • All ads are black and white. you, understand that your ad won't run • Make ads the right size and orientation. If until we have the cash on hand, so make ads are the wrong size, they won't run or those arrangements before the ad we'll chop 'em up with scissors to fit. deadline. • We don’t reserve ad space. • If any of this is fuzzy, don't hesitate to contact us. We'll explain it. • Sean <[email protected]> • Todd <[email protected]> • • Rich Mackin <[email protected]> • Nardwuar <[email protected]> • • Designated Dale <[email protected]> • • Rhythm Chicken <[email protected]> • Everyone else can be reached c/o Razorcake. Razorcake is made by: Sean Carswell, Todd Taylor, ktspin, and Skinny Dan. This issue is dedicated to the memory of Dick Drazan. Beer in fancy goblets? Julia Smut Thank you list: Intergalactic thanks to Kat Jetson for taking this issue’s cover and Pete Hucklebuck got hitched. shot of Strike Anywhere, plus the ones in the interview; Knuckle-poppin’ thanks, as always, to Julia Smut and Printworks for holding my candy-assed hand through the printing of the cover; fine line thanks to Art Fuentes for the Dee Dee Ramone picture and head-dipping thanks to Matt Braun of Dick Army for the eulogy; Formula 44 D thanks to Chris Zeigler for Fleshies interview and trimmed beard thanks to Andy Harris for the pics.; Liz O. for plumbing the darkness of tribute bands; Randy from Mint for the help with the gosh Damned screen grabs; Shawn Granton for the pen-perfect illustration in Sean’s column; Donofthedead for the dread-rattlin’ Strike Anywhere shot; Boston Not LA thanks to Al Quint for the Out Cold live photos; record reviews trenches thanks to Cuss Baxter, Roger Moser Jr., Matt Average, Dan Yemin, and Namella J. Kim; pool-cleaning thanks to Bradley Williams for his zine reviews; the slave labor insert crew; and Sean wants to send out a special thanks to all the people who fed, housed, or drank with him while on tour. And to Univision, for allowing us to watch the World Cup without having to pay for cable. Issue #9, Aug./Sept. 2002 Cutting. Tasty. www.razorcake.com and PO Box 42129, Los Angeles, CA 90042 Table of Contents ***** Jimmy Alvarado and ReTodd ................... Emo Death Match ................pg. 4 Art ............................. Lil’ Beez and the Misfinks ............................... pg. 7 Sean Carswell ...................... A Monkey to Ride the Dog ........................ pg. 8 Ayn Imperato ........................................ 94103 .................................... pg. 10 Ben Weasel. ............................. That Iron String .................... pg. 12 Money ......................................... Pog Mo Thon .......................................... pg. 14 Rich Mackin ....................... The Twisted Balloon ......................... pg. 20 Nardwuar The Human Serviette ............. Who Are You? ..................... pg. 22 Gary Hornberger .......................... Squeeze My Horn ....................... pg. 28 Designated Dale ...................... I’m Against It ..........................pg. 30 The Rhythm Chicken .................... The Dinghole Reports ................... pg. 32 ***** Ben Hamper .................... Interview by Maddy Tight Pants ...................... pg. 34 Out Cold ................................. Interview by ReTodd ................................ pg. 38 The Briefs ................................. Interview by Money ...................... pg. 44 Fleshies ................................ Interview by Chris Zeigler ..................... pg. 48 Tribute Bands ............................. Article by Liz O. ................................... pg. 52 Strike Anywhere ..................... Interview by ReTodd .................. pg. 58 ***** Alas Poor DeeDee .......................... He Sniffed Some Glue ..................... pg. 69 Dan Monick .................. Nameless, Faceless Photo Page ................... pg. 71 Record Reviews ....... Fucking Fucker, This Fucking Shit’s Fucked .................. pg. 72 Zine Reviews ................... Saggy Boobs and Sexuality Issues ............... pg. 92 Book Reviews ................. Review is a Six Lettered Word ..................... pg. 96 Razorcake is bi-monthly. Issues are $3.00 ppd. in the U.S. Yearly subscriptions (six issues) are $15.00. Plus you get some free shit. These prices are only valid for people who live in the US and are not in prison. Issues and subs are more for everyone else (because we have to pay more in postage). Write us and we’ll give you a price. and Complete, Utter ReTodd ReToddnation Not even a line of crank two-hundred feet long and the necessary lung power to snif f it all in one humongous huf f could keep me awake long enough through this disc to care. TOO BAD YOU DIDN’T SAVE I couldn’t do it alone, so I bamboozled an the shelves in one foul swoop? ENOUGH ROOM intrepid (and highly susceptible to praise) “Well, when I called Dale and told him of IN YOUR BACKPACK FOR TALENT cohort, Jimmy Alvarado. For the past seven my idea, he said he was unfortunately unable to years, both he and I have reviewed – quite liter- participate as he had a pressing appointment to Wallowing in the Nobody Loves Me Pile ally – a few thousand records. I figured it was have his “Beat on the Brat” promotional base- of the Razorcake Record Rack time we did it together. So, with a cardigan ball bat’s display case bulletproofed. When I pulled closely, box of tissue at the ready, white asked Sean, he mumbled something I couldn’t Or belt cinched tight, I gave Mr. Alvarado a little quite make out, holed up in his room, and told hair gel so he could Romulan-up his bangs while me to keep him out of it unless we were going to Tag Teaming E-Vile: In Which Todd and he made sure my backpack was secure. We were sell the CDs back. Maddy said something about Jimmy Feed Their Masochistic Cravings by ready to go into the weenie-fied emo trenches. a court order, stemming from a wild criminal Reviewing a Bunch of Emo CDs in One We knew the goings would be rough, mano-a- escapade involving Honey Bunches of Oats, Marathon Sitting mano, old fashioned knife fight style.
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