The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, May 21, 2021 — Page 1 We Put the Vol. CCLXV, No. 18 The New Hampshire Gazette May 21, 2021 The Nation’s Oldest Newspaper™ • Editor: Steven Fowle • Founded 1756 by Daniel Fowle Free! PO Box 756, Portsmouth, NH 03802 • [email protected] • www.nhgazette.com in Free Press
The Fortnightly Rant The Storm’s Not Coming—It’s Here ew Englanders are familiar lished that a person’s right to in- with the scene: video shows fluence elections should increase in Nrain falling sideways and random proportion to their net worth. objects flying through the air. Crash- Shelby County v. Holder, in 2013, ing waves beat furiously against the ruled that, since the Republican Par- shore. Finally the land crumbles. A ty had not been found guilty recent- house falls, beaten to smithereens, ly of criminally intimidating poor, and ceases to exist. non-white voters, the law that had Traditionally it’s been a hurricane been preventing them from doing so or a bad nor’easter, and the process could now be discarded. takes a few hours. Lately, it’s politics. Now that they have achieved such The end hasn’t come for America’s dominance, one might think that democracy yet, but things don’t look Republicans could relax a bit. Cer- particularly good. tainly life in these allegedly United Nobody builds on the edge of a States has been relatively and re- cliff, of course.* Things just creep up freshingly placid since Jack Dorsey on you: the Atlantic Ocean, the Re- threw a certain someone off Twit- publican Party…. ter and Sleepy Joe moved into the Say what you want about Repub- White House. It no longer seems licans,† they have a plan, and they like the daily news has been scripted stick to it. by Chuck Barris of “Gong Show” “In some cases, we actually draft They passed a bill in the House— effect. As we become more and For at least forty years they’ve fame. [the bills] for them,” she said, “or we H.R. 1, the For the People Act— more disorganized and discombob- been obsessed with packing the Such thinking, though, is not for have a sentinel on our behalf give which would defend and expand ulated, the likelihood increases that Supreme Court with their kind of Republicans. Eugene V. Debs said, them the model legislation so it has voting rights, tighten campaign fi- Grenada or Panama—or a coalition judge. They have their own official “While there is a lower class, I am in that grassroots, from-the-bottom- nance laws, limit partisan gerryman- made up of every country south of cabal, just for that purpose. Tens it, while there is a criminal element, up type of vibe.” dering, and create new ethics rules the border that we’ve ever invad- of millions of dollars pour into the I am of it, and while there is a soul Do you want artisanal feudalism? for federal officeholders. ed—will be tempted to try and take Federalist Society every year—in in prison, I am not free.” Republi- Because this is how you get artisanal Sounds good, right? It is good. It’s revenge. tax-free donations, no less, diverted cans are similarly determined, but feudalism. More than 360 Republi- so good that 68 percent of Ameri- Considering the state we’re in, from the U.S. Treasury. Its apologists with the opposite intent. As long as can-backed voter suppression bills cans want to see it passed. Partisan they might get it, too. Given how will point to its other programs, but a poor, non-white person insists on have been filed in 47 state legisla- hacks working for the Koch political our deranged government has been its core mission is to control who sits voting for Democrats, that needs to tures. As one might expect, many machine were caught on tape admit- blocking action on climate change, on the Supreme Court. be made a felony. of these bills are quite outrageous: ting as much. maybe they should, in self defense. With six out of the nine sitting Last month Jessica Anderson, “You gave a drink of water to a per- Before it can become law, though, Perhaps somehow we’ll get Justices being present or former executive director of Heritage Ac- son who stood in line for hours in its counterpart, S. 1, must pass in the through this. Stranger things have members, the Federalist Society has tion—yet another tax-free cabal the hot sun to vote? OK, felon.” Senate. There it faces an obstacle happened. Earlier this month nearly swept the table. for free-spending oligarchs—was To a citizen’s way of thinking, that demonstrates its importance. It Shakuntala Gaikwad, a 76-year What sort of Court have those caught on tape speaking to a group most of these laws are probably un- only takes 41 Senators—who repre- old woman from Baramati, India, rich white folks bought? Surprise! It of the usual suspects: people with an constitutional as well as outrageous. sent, as Ari Berman points out, just who was thought to have died from favors rich white men. odd million or two to spare, which That’s why only Federalist Society 21 percent of the the country—to Covid, was moments away from be- Citizens United, in 2010, estab- they would hate to see frittered away alumni get to make that determi- block this bill or any other with a ing cremated but was taken back to on infrastructure, or education, or nation. filibuster. This is the same crew, re- the hospital instead, after she began * Nobody normal, anyway. We have heard health care, or veterans. Anderson Nobody is all bad, of course. We member, that turns a blind eye to the to cry. some strange tales about people with more money than sense building monuments to described how Heritage is working can credit Republicans with per- January 6th coup attempt. It would be wrong to say we know their egos on oceanfront property in fash- hard to ensure that they will contin- forming at least one important pub- We’re beginning to think that how she felt, but surely we can em- ionable locations. ue to have the upper hand: by writ- lic service: their attack on democracy this process of bananafication our pathize. † No, on second thought, don’t: this is a ing voter suppression laws around has been so aggressive that it got the government has been going through With a lot of luck, perhaps we, family paper…. the country. Democrats’ attention. could eventually have a boomerang too, might be spared.
The Alleged News® Who Actually Owns the Formerly-Award-Winning Local Daily? rom time to time a farmer the sobriquet, often acronymized as Having created this morass of Murdoch—infamous for, among In 2017, Ken Doctor at the Nie- feels compelled to waste half a AWLD, both out of habit and be- confusion, we resolved to clarify the other things, having introduced man Journalism Lab explained [Fday wrestling a rock out of a location cause it seemed to have become part matter; let us hope that, in doing so, photos of nude girls on page three where GateHouse got the money: where its continued presence is a con- of the local vernacular. we do not make it worse. of The Sun, his London tabloid— “Institutional and mutual fund stant aggravation which can no longer A few years ago an astute mem- The Herald lost its claim to local began eyeing their asset. Prolonged shareholders…own at least 70 per- be borne. Such is the nature of the fol- ber of our team pointed out that the ownership in the late 1960s, when negotiations were consummated in cent of the company. They find its lowing patch of text. Readers need not term “local,” as we had been using the heirs of Justin Downing Hart- 2007; Murdoch induced the Ban- dividend—just increased to 35 cents apologize for skipping over it; we apol- it, was misleading. Though we had ford [1898 – 1963] sold the paper. crofts to overcome their disdain for per quarter—attractive. There’s rich ogize for its length. Once we got this initially intended it to refer to the The purchaser was Roy Thomson, a crude Australians through the clev- irony here: The retirement funds of rock rolling…. In our defense, it could paper’s purported news coverage, in Canadian barber’s son whose success er tactic of offering yet more money. those in the news industry, among have been even longer. – The Ed.] this context “local” seemed to sug- in the newspaper racket was so spec- The Dow Jones papers—including many others, helps fund these New Elsewhere in this issue we cite a gest that the seat of its controlling tacular that it earned him a British the forlorn Herald—became part of Media takeovers, which in turn re- statement which was recently pub- powers lay somewhere within this title: 1st Baron Thomson of Fleet. Murdoch’s News Corp. sult in more job cutbacks and the lished in the Portsmouth Herald—a Zip Code. Such, of course, was not At some point Thomson sold to Five years later News Corpse— thinning of journalism in commu- newspaper which we used to call the case, nor had it been for many Ottaway, which was then absorbed please pardon the accuracy—sold nities from coast to coast. Those “The Award-Winning Local Daily.” years. by Dow Jones. In plain English, the Dow papers to GateHouse nice dividend checks mean fewer The moniker had been earned by the Somehow, the alleged editor “Dow Jones” is a legal fiction—a Media for $87 million. Perhaps to journalist paychecks.” frequency with which that newspa- decided that the solution was to corporation whose function is to di- better align its financial and moral Should we then call what’s per published alleged news stories henceforth refer to the Herald as the vert attention from humans. In this conditions, GateHouse promptly left of the Herald the Former- about its latest slew of awards. “Hedge-Fund Owned Local Daily.” case, they are the Bancrofts whom declared bankruptcy. Because it is a ly-Award-Winning, Mysteri- Those stories no longer appear Once again, the cornucopia of nep- Wikipedia calls “a family of public- corporate person, rather than a low- ously-Owned Local Daily, or with such frequency. This might be otism had yielded its rotten fruits. ly reclusive Boston socialites” who ly human, GateHouse’s bankruptcy FAWMOLD? Seems ungainly…. due to increasing modesty, or per- What was the reader to think—that while away their leisure time breed- was no obstacle to an epic spending haps to declining quality; it is not the hedge fund was local? (It was ing show horses and sailing yachts. spree which would have caused Roy The Alleged News® for us to say. We continued using not.) Alas for the Bancrofts, Rupert Thomson to turn green with envy. to page two Page 2 — The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, May 21, 2021
The Alleged News® Japanese subs off Ore.” from page one On Thursday—May 19th—we received a comment and an email Golden Boy Found Under Golden Dome contesting the accuracy of that item. The excitement at GQP HQ—and We are always, of course, grateful at Politico—is palpable: for any assistance in improving the Dateline, May 17 : “Republicans accuracy of that feature. Some such have launched an all-out effort to corrections take the fun out of an woo Gov. Chris Sununu into a chal- item. This one had the opposite ef- lenge to Democratic Sen. Maggie fect. Hassan next fall.” … Commenter Mana Nui steered “‘He’d be a great candidate,’ said us to a YouTube video titled “Oregon Minority Leader Mitch McCo- Coast Project,” dated July 21, 2014: nnell, who has personally lobbied Narrator: “In the spring of 1943, Sununu to take on Hassan. ‘We’re Robert Wood was a 19 year old sail- hoping he’d make the race.’” … or assigned as a signalmen aboard “Sununu has the potential to be his sub chaser the SC 536, and al- the most important Republican re- though Robert will be 96 years old cruit of the cycle. He’s an incumbent this Christmas Day, he can still recall three-term governor …. And he’s the details of the events that began political royalty in the Granite State, on May 19th, 1943….” the son of a former governor and Robert Wood: On May the 18th White House chief of staff as well of 1943 the PC 815 was enroute to as the brother of a former senator.” San Diego, California, and of course And here we thought monarchy they had their sound gear going and had fallen out of favor. they picked up a ping from a sub- –=≈=– marine…. ing with a full crew that had been Narrator: “As the addition- hours of May twentieth the blimps Maybe L. Ron Hubbard DID Sink a Sub Narrator: “The soundman alerted trained for action. After identifying al ships arrived in the area, attack used signal flares to indicate the lo- Three years ago on May 19th, our the commanding officer of thePC the presence of one submarine that patterns were set up and additional cation of the enemy submarine that Tidal Guide began featuring a 815, Lieutenant Ron Hubbard, and was deemed unfriendly the sound depth charges were deployed. At one had been detected. Charges were particular item; here is the most again confirmed for the lieutenant men on duty and the sound tech- point, the sounds of blowing tanks set to the appropriate depth and recent version: “1943—U.S. subma- what he identified as the sound of nician responsible for the operation could be heard below the surface; deployed by the SC 536. Crewmen rine-chaser PC-815, L. Ron Hub- screws from a submarine. It was of the magnetic recorder soon iden- and several crewmen observed large aboard the blimps reported a direct bard, Cmdr., battles non-existent wartime so the PC 815 was sail- tified the sound of a second set of amounts of orange oil, boiling to the hit on the target, something Robert screws in the water. ocean surface. The engagement con- Wood clearly recalls.” “The PC 815 reported the targets tinued. Wood: “I communicated with the and prepared to engage the sub- “The morning of May twenti- blimp quite a bit…. One time they merged enemy. Once in position eth, 1943 began with coordinated sent a message that we, our depth the range was determined and the attacks on the submarines between charges had made a direct hit on the first depth charges were dropped in the surface vessels and the two U.S. submarine, and that we had sunk the an attempt to damage the subma- Navy blimps. Magnetic sound con- sub. So we didn’t forget that message rine and force it to the surface. The tact was confirmed and provided by and were very proud of it.” lieutenant [Hubbard] contacted the sound technicians aboard the ships Narrator: “On the morning of naval authorities in Astoria and re- before additional depth charges were May 21st the surface ships’ crewmen quested reinforcements—additional dropped. Sound information from continue to investigate the area that ships and charges to be dispatched one of the blimps indicated that one the ships attacked the night before. to the location.” of the submarines had turned and The soundmen and sound techni- Among them was Wood’s ship, seemed to be headed for shallower cian on the PC 815 again reported the SC 536. water. Surface vessels again pursued the sounds of air tanks being blown Wood: “So we started dropping and attacked.” below the surface and just off their The Party Band—the pride of Lowell, Massachusetts, or so we would dropping charges. We were also op- Wood said that May 19th and port bow. They waited for a subma- imagine—visited Portsmouth on Sunday. The band has been together at erating with two PCs and another 20th were the busiest days of the en- rine to surface. least since 2014, we learn from snooping around at partybandlowell. sub chaser and ourselves, and then gagement. The PC 815 dropped 67 “Suddenly the man on deck spot- bandcamp.com. Anyone with ears, though, could easily tell: they’ve been another ship [Coast Guard Cutter charges. On the second day, Woods’ ted a periscope that had risen up playing together for a good long while. The crowd clearly loved the show. Bonham] and two blimps. This was 536 ran out of charges; more were through a boil of orange oil. The Albums are available on their bandcamp page, along with merch includ- a new experience. We had never op- sent down from Astoria. barrel of the periscope was clearly ing a cloth patch bearing this succinct message: “Mass. Brass Punk Funk.” erated with blimps before.” Narrator: “In the early evening identifiable. Gunners immediately
Sometimes Old is Good “Happy The Fechheimer Building, one of the fin- to The arts are vital to our vibrant Seacoast community. est examples of a cast-iron facade in Port- Support Please consider supporting your many local arts and land, Oregon, was built in 1885. Listed in Progressive culture organizations in this time of crisis. the National Register of Historic Places, it was restored in 1981 by Russell Fellows Journalism Gathering together to experience the arts is the heart Properties, the principals of which enjoy a subscription to this newspaper. and and soul of what we do here at The Music Hall. The We are ever grateful for the unwavering support of our community, and look forward to seeing you when our New Hampshire doors reopen. Gazette” – Joe Keefe �/MUSICHALL �@MUSICHALL �/MUSICHALLNH 603.436.2400 • THEMUSICHALL.ORG B2W BOX OFFICE AT THE HISTORIC THEATER • 28 CHESTNUT ST • PORTSMOUTH NH The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, May 21, 2021 — Page 3 swung the deck gun into position ports were dismissed. The highest and opened fire. As a hail of bullets ranking officials—those who had were fired toward the periscope it allowed the U.S. Navy vessels to en- disappeared back under the surface gage possible enemy submarines of of the waves. Since the PC 815 was the Oregon coast—now displayed stationary in the water at that time skepticism.” additional charges were dropped Officially, there were no subs. by the SC 536. Sound operators The Oregon Coast Project be- reported that the enemy target was lieved Robert Wood, and spent distancing itself from the location some years searching the sea floor of the 815 but was believed to be for wreckage, locating a promising damaged because it departed at a anomaly. After Wood died in 2016 very slow rate. According to declas- it issued this statement: “While our sified reports the engagement with hope was that we would be able to the submarines lasted for 68 hours. prove his story before we lost him, Depth charges were dropped for 55 we intend to continue the work to hours. prove the events for all of the vet- “Formal reports to naval authori- erans families who know what hap- ties in Astoria were submitted by the pened.” commanding officer of theSC 536, We’ve asked them to keep us Ed Kroepke, and from Lieutenant posted—for Wood’s sake, of course, Hubbard of the PC 815. Those re- not Hubbard’s.
We Return to Newsprint on June 4th Digital publication is fine for a svelte, one- Last year, on Friday, March 13th, what it is. It’s nice to be able to reach ounce packet when our Origami Gang dispersed readers all over the world—even, of unfettered, and our Downtown Distribution we presume, on the International non-fiction team turned in their bags and slips, Space Station, though we have yet news—so, we’re we could only guess what the future to receive any suggestion that that’s not waiting any more. might hold. ever happened. Besides, before the We will see you again, in our old, We might have been expected to pandemic, we were already mailing familiar form, in a fortnight. have had some inkling, having sur- to readers in Europe and the rest of At least, so we assume at the mo- Work has begun on a Super Flood Basin for Dry Dock No. 1 at the Ports- vived the Flu Pandemic of 1918. the world was in reach, thanks to In- ment. We try to always be honest: mouth Naval Shipyard—which, so far as this newspaper is concerned, is Staff turnover during the interven- ternational Forever Stamps. we have some trepidation. As we in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. We don’t mean to be cranky about it, but ing century, however, had wiped out We are online because we must might say to anyone else who was New Hampshire v. Maine, 532 U.S. 742 (2001) be damned. In prepa- any institutional memory of that be. Cyberspace, however—the rab- attempting this, we’ll believe it when ration for that work, a nine-month program of underwater blasting will tragic event. As for any in-house re- bit hole as big as the universe—is we see it. begin next month. Enthusiasts hoping for a repeat of the 1905 Hender- cords detailing how Fernando Wood paradoxically confined inside an ar- We know there will be challenges. son’s Point blast will, however, be disappointed. According to the Former- Hartford, our publisher at that time, ray of gizmos. Our position is that Some of those we can plan for, be- ly-Award-Winning, Mysteriously-Owned Local Daily (see the Alleged surmounted that challenge, well… no amount of digitized grandios- cause we know what they are. What News) Naval Facilities and Engineering Command Structural Engineer when one takes over a newspaper ity could ever compare with being changes, though, have been wrought Linn Lebel has said that the “visible result topside will be a minor distur- with a $40 check to the Secretary of physically present, however modest- on our environment by the past 31 bance in the localized water surface area with slight ground vibrations…. State, such luxuries are not included. ly, in the allegedly real world. fortnights? It will not be a dramatic gush of water and discharge of rock and sand…. Through sheer good fortune, We have used this space on a We have not been this uncertain most of our community neighbors will not even be aware of the operations.” when the plague struck, our web- number of occasions to proclaim since May 1, 1999 when we resumed Before this work got under way, the Navy had to apply for an “inciden- site had just been rebuilt from the our eagerness to return to three di- regularly-scheduled publication tal harassment authorization.” It requires that the area around the site ground up by the fine folks at the mensions; we just could not wait to here in our home town, under our be monitored for the presence of marine mammals, that the site itself be Secret Agency. Being online-only resume our proper existence—pro- proper name, after being subsumed cordoned off with an underwater “bubble curtain,” and that blasting be in our previous form for 15 months viding every fortnight “the freshest for four decades into what was then delayed if marine mammals are in the area. would have been disheartening. advices, foreign and domestick” in the Award-Winning Local Daily.
Murph’s Fortnightly Quote
“Remember always, that all of us, and “The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are you and I especially, are descended from always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.” immigrants and revolutionists.” – Bertrand Russell “Terrorism is what we call the violence of the weak, and we condemn it; – Franklin Delano Roosevelt [email protected] war is what we call the violence of the strong, and we glorify it.”
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As soon as it’s safe for them to do so, our volunteer distributors will resume bringing this newspaper to following locations: Concord: The State House Visitor’s Center, Gibson’s Book Store, 45 S. Main St. A Constantly-Changing Selection of Concord COOP Grocery Store, 24 S. Main St. Concord Public Library, 45 Green St. New & Used Books in both Franklin Pierce Law School, 2 White St. Hard Cover & Paperback Hanover: Your Coffee, Ice Cream, Children Give the Gift of History – Come Shop with Us! Hanover Public Library, 13 South St. & Pets Are All Welcome Keene: Store Hours Keene Public Library, 60 Winter St. Mon - Sat: 9 a.m. - 7 p.m. Sun: 10 a.m. - 7 p.m. Lebanon: Lebanon Public Library, 9 E. Park St. Page 4 — The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, May 21, 2021
Harassment In Spain Of The Lawyer tions have filed a complaint against the For Catalan Pro-Independence Politicians judge, the prosecutor and a magistrate To the Editor: for allegedly covering up a murder and Gonzalo Boye is the lawyer for the prevarication. Boye has challenged the President of Catalonia, Carles Puig- judge and asked the Constitutional demont, and members of his govern- Court not to allow anyone to access ment, who, in 2017, accompanied him his phone as it contains confidential lation that would help solve America’s to Belgium after holding a referendum information about his work as a de- pressing problems. This is a laudable on Catalan independence. They went fence lawyer. In an interview with the aspiration and necessary to overcome into exile in Belgium because they saw newspaper Vilaweb [https://www. the dreary legislative deadlock that future Republican domination. Any that the Spanish justice system would vilaweb.cat/noticies/boye-tinc-compli- has hamstrung public policy. Bipar- doubt that blind loyalty to Trump is Biden’s aspiration for bipartisan poli- condemn them even though organis- cat/], Boye explains that he believes tisan solutions, however, require two the prime requisite for good standing cies are under threat from uncompro- ing referendums is not a crime in the that his pro-independence clients will parties that share a vision of the com- in the Republican Party should have mising Republicans and Democrats. Spanish penal code. end up winning before Spain, but that mon good and participate in reasoned been erased by the recent removal of Unbending conformity to ideology This is exactly how it turned out, be- his own defence, as a lawyer, will be analysis to achieve compromise solu- Liz Cheney from her leadership po- or narrow self-interest cannot gener- cause the Spanish justice system sen- more difficult. He is convinced that tions. It is questionable whether these sition by House Republicans for the ate the solutions that provide repaired tenced the members of Puigdemont’s his persecution is the work of pow- elements exist in the political discourse heinous crime of telling the truth infrastructure, cyber security, effective government who stayed in Catalonia erful groups, operating from within of the Trump era. about the 2020 election. health care, increased income equality to between nine and 13 years in prison. the Spanish state, who want to make The greatest impediment to bipar- It is hard to conceive that a par- and a fairer educational system. Thanks to the work of lawyer Gonza- him pay for his defence of the Catalan tisanship is the Trump-dominated ty fully engaged in the promotion of Robert D. Russell, Ph.D. lo Boye and the international team of pro-independence supporters. Republican Party. It has degenerated lies and crackpot conspiracy theories Harrisburg, Pa. lawyers with whom he collaborates, Maria M. Garayoa into tribal loyalty to Trump and has to further their own narrow self-in- Robert: Puigdemont and the other Catalan Barcelona, Catalonia become solely focused on the preser- terests is capable of engaging in an Thanks for writing. We envy your exiles remain at liberty, despite the ef- For more information: vation of its power. It seems incapa- honest process of reasoned discourse ability to maintain equanimity while forts of the Spanish justice system to https://english.vilaweb.cat/noticies/ ble of developing a shared concept of to achieve compromise with the Pres- discussing the behavior of reactionaries. extradite and imprison them. Since he international-lawyers-express-con- the common good or engaging in an ident’s initiatives. We differ on police funding, though. took over the defence of the Catalan cern-over-gonzalo-boyes-prosecution/ honest dialogue with Democrats to Although the Republican Party Our guess is that half of police budgets pro-independence supporters, Gon- https://english.vilaweb.cat/noticies/ achieve one. Rather than recognizing is the largest impediment to biparti- goes to paying armed people to do work zalo Boye’s bank accounts have been the-spanish-justice-system-against-de- Biden’s valid election, most Repub- san solutions, the radical wing of the for which they are not trained, and in closed, he has had four tax inspections fence-lawyer-gonzalo-boye/ lican legislators and 70 percent of Democratic Party also provides road- which firearms do more harm than good. and three labour inspections, his office https://www.elnacional.cat/en/ their base voters persist in supporting blocks to compromise. The focus of We ought to pay other people to do that has been broken into twice at night politics/complaint-boye-lawyers- Trump’s Big Lie that the election was radical Progressives on identity poli- work in different ways. somehow without the security camer- spanish-judge-covering-up-mur- lost due to massive voter fraud. tics has too often generated ideology Plenty of Americans are racists, but as recording anything, and a criminal der_599399_102.html In their attempt to defend the Big rather than enlightenment. “Woke” that’s mostly their problem. Our society is case has been opened against him for https://english.vilaweb.cat/noticies/ Lie, Republicans have cast off from Progressives have too frequently de- structurally racist—that’s a problem for alleged crimes of money laundering international-lawyers-express-con- any mooring to truth or rationality. manded an uncompromising loyalty all of us. and falsification of documents. cern-over-gonzalo-boyes-prosecution/ Arizona Republicans have initiated to dogma rather than participating in Just because the Republicans have gone The criminal case against Gonzalo https://openkat.eu/gonza- a crackpot “audit” of the state’s presi- a search for truth. Demands to “de- way ’round the bend, does not mean, in Boye is based on two former clients’ lo-boye-the-lawyer-who-defends-puig- dential election long after it had been fund” or even to eliminate the police our semi-humble opinion, that the left- voluntary statements, both of whom demont-prosecuted-for-drug-traffick- certified. The audit is being managed are examples. The conservative back- most end the the Democratic Party is tak- are in prison. Boye claims that the two ing-laundering/ by the ludicrously-named firm “Cyber lash against the 1619 Project illustrates ing things too far. men are lying and that he has evidence. https://english.vilaweb.cat/noticies/ Ninjas.” The firm is owned and man- how a worthy effort to trace the his- Democratic moderates are complicit in One of the men, Puentes Saavedra, the-spanish-justice-system-against-de- aged by an avid Trump supporter. At tory and consequences of slavery can most of the horrendous damage done by is convicted of drug trafficking, and fence-lawyer-gonzalo-boye/ last report, the ninjas were scouring degenerate into political warfare when GOP lunatics over the past forty years. there is also strong evidence that he Maria: ballots for any trace of bamboo based both sides retreat into ideological con- The Editor committed a murder in Colombia. We thank you for this: another lucid on a theory that thousands of bogus formity. The damages of slavery have –=≈=– Despite the seriousness of the crimes, report on the campaign being waged ballots had been sent to Arizona from been consequential and long-standing Mother’s Day Puentes Saavedra was released after against the people of Catalonia. We look the far east. Other Republican legis- but to make unsupported claims that Dear Editor: testifying against his former lawyer. forward to the day when we can publish lators are using the Big Lie as justi- white Americans are inherently racist Mother’s Day. I read a lot of science Two months after the drug traffick- a report from you in which justice—true fication to pursue voter suppression and the country’s history can only be fiction. It has come a long way from er and alleged murderer’s statement, justice—triumphs. legislation in several red states. The told through a racist lens (as some pro- space monsters to political commen- police searched the lawyer’s office and The Editor legislation is designed to limit voting ponents of the Project do) is to ignore tary. confiscated his mobile phone to make –=≈=– by Democratic voters and to consol- the complexities of American history. Human beings are diverse. We have a copy of its contents. A Little Civil Debate idate Republican control over future The demand for blind loyalty to a an odd sex life, compared to other spe- Despite the harassment to which To the Editor: elections. These Banana Republicans failed autocrat or deluded conformi- cies of mammals. We can get pregnant he is subjected, Boye has not given up. President Biden has consistently have no qualms in destroying im- ty to dogma cannot sustain respect- any month in the three decades we are He and four Catalan lawyers’ associa- promoted bipartisan support for legis- partial election processes to ensure ful and reasoned discourse. President fecund. It used to be shameful for a
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phineas test The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, May 21, 2021 — Page 5
Bayonet Etiquette
“You can get a lot done with a bayonet, Women are not “lesser” than men. but sitting on one is uncomfortable” They are fellow human-beings. When – from Secondhand Time, Svetlana Alexievich will we recognize all humans as the removed, back when it was the only people they are? I. Things you can do with a bayonet woman to not be pregnant after her treatment for a blood clot, by calling Diane M. Starkey first menses. his refusal suicide, which would deny Rochester, N.H. Kill people. That may seem like ancient histo- him heaven. His personal choice to Diane: ry, but the nagging from would-be ignore it, which is now a right to deny It’s good to hear from you again. It’s Persuade people to do things they don’t want to do grandparents shows it is not. medical care, was not an option for a funny—although we can easily imagine by threatening to kill them. When I was raised, and schooled, in good, practicing Catholic. a priest or a pope arguing with you, we Control unruly crowds the Catholic faith, I remember Pope I feel that a woman’s choice to not can’t imagine you in an argument with John XXIII, who was in office when I become a parent, for any reason, is her Jesus. by threatening to kill them. had First Holy Communion. right. Her faith is her own business, The Editor Control peaceful crowds In the Army, I met Seventh Day between her and her God. Govern- –=≈=– by threatening to kill them. Adventists, and some other faiths. The ment has no right to tell her to take Free Palestine priests I had were military, but I did that risk to her life, her sanity—as she Dear Editor, Control your wife not see the point in some Catholic will be concerned for her child—or There is no safe place in Palestine. It by threatening to kill her. rules. her child’s welfare is greater than her has no army and is occupied by Israel, a In the news, a child facing own, and her willingness to become a country with one of the largest militar- Rob a bank or convenience store life-threatening surgery was advocat- parent. ies in the world with tanks, jets, drones, by threatening to kill the clerk. ed for baptism by her father, a “lapsed” If the gain to the population is guided missiles, assorted weaponry, Wave it in the air on your front porch or in your backyard Catholic. The priest in his parish re- worth the possibilities of a child that and over 200 nuclear bombs, plus an fused, as he was “not likely to raise her is severely handicapped, will die no extensive surveillance system. to demonstrate your manliness. in the faith.” To me, this was a form matter what is done, or is simply dis- Israel’s military might is largely Eat peas with it (this one’s challenging). of blackmail, and a threat to her soul’s abled, then the government should be funded by the U.S.A. As a result of our Kill snakes (which I did one morning in Vietnam in 1967 fate, her chance at heaven. I could not willing to pay for the mother’s medical largesse, Gaza—all 12 by 7.5 miles of see Jesus saying such things. care and the child’s, for life. The gov- it—is an open-air prison, housing over for no good reason I can think of). Most faiths, not just Christian, hold ernments of other countries do so. Yet, two million souls. It is one of the dens- Bash open your C-ration cans that theirs is the only way to heaven. I they have abortion available to wom- est places on the planet. Is it any won- cannot see that, either. I rather agree en. It remains the choice of the woman der they have a very active Resistance if your John Wayne can opener is broken with Will Rogers famous quote, “If and her doctor. These, to me, are true movement? Isn’t it time to send in UN or otherwise unavailable. dogs don’t go to heaven, I want to go democratic societies. Women are held troops to provide security and keep the where they go when I die.” as responsible for themselves as men peace? Isn’t it time to free Palestine? II. Things you should not do with a bayonet In a logical argument, if God is the are, and respected as such. Genevieve Fraser Sit on it. all-knowing, eternal Being claimed, The Catholic Church, as many Orange, Mass. He/She/It, being a Great Spirit, would Christian faiths, not all, is still in the Genevieve: – W. D. Ehrhart is a life member of Vietnam Veterans Against the War understand my mind. If there is no feudal age. Women and children If you ask us, it’s past time to free Pal- and a founding member of Veterans for Peace. God, then I cease to exist; my matter, are not property of the husband, the estine. or body, would simply return to the Church, or government. We abolished The Editor earth. My spiritual essence, fueled by slavery for African Americans, yet –=≈=– chemical-electrical energy, would dis- they still face persecution, as other for- “People used to think that learning to read tain automatic qualities of memory and possess enough knowledge to reflect and sipate. mer nationalities in our country, and evidenced human progress; they still cel- observation). But to talk about critical discern, they believe—or disbelieve—in I agree with donating body organs. in other parts of the world, because of ebrate the decline of illiteracy as a great faculties and discernment is to talk about toto what they read. And as such people, I have lived long enough to see the this attitude. Women are still killed victory; they condemn countries with a something far above primary education moreover, will select the easiest, not the compassion and humanity of it. I nev- by their lovers because—they—do large proportion of illiterates; they think and to consider a very small minori- hardest, reading matter, they are precise- er believed God would deny heaven to not want to become parents. Many of that reading is a road to freedom. All this ty. The vast majority of people, perhaps ly on the level at which the printed word those whose body was not complete. the female homicides throughout the is debatable, for the important thing is ninety percent, know how to read, but do can seize and convince them without That belief is as old as Ancient Egypt. world, not just in the U.S.A., are also not to be able to read, but to understand not exercise their intelligence beyond this. opposition. They are perfectly adapted to My grandfather’s leg had to be em- caused by this—as the “it’s just rape,” what one reads, to reflect on and judge They attribute authority and eminent propaganda.” balmed and held for his own grave. dismissal of the continuing terroriza- what one reads. Outside of that, reading value to the printed word, or, conversely, – Jaques Ellul, Propaganda: The For- His priest talked him into having it tion of women. has no meaning (and even destroys cer- reject it altogether. As these people do not mation of Men’s Attitudes (1962)
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Youth Protest Bank of America Funding Fossil Fuels Bedford, N.H.—On Saturday eve- 2020, Bank of America lent $3.16 step up, and stop investing money ning a group of high school activists billion dollars to Enbridge, the com- in the fossil fuel industry, funding from the 350NH Youth Team and pany building the pipeline. They lent dangerous projects such as the Line members of Extinction Rebellion $350 Million to the Dakota Access 3 Pipeline, currently being built on met at the Bank of America in Bed- Pipeline, which still operates today! indigenous land. “We are calling ford to protest the bank’s involve- Without money from big banks, from all corners of the globe that it ment in funding the fossil fuel in- fossil fuel companies wouldn’t is time to Defund Line 3. This is just dustry. Speakers urged for the end to have enough money to support the a start, but it is not the end of our the money pipeline from banks and building of more pipelines. Bank of efforts. We will continue to fight un- other firms that keeps the fossil fuel America could stop this, if they stop til we strip the monetary foundation industry afloat even as our society lending these companies billions of of the fossil fuel industry away and has increasingly recognized the en- dollars.” put out the fire that threatens all of vironmental costs of fossil fuels. The This action, organized by high us, once and for all” says Anna Rose event was both virtual with a Zoom school-aged activists across New Marion, a senior in high school and call run by youth team members and Hampshire, sends a message to the organizer of the event. in-person where participants drew CEOs of Bank of America and oth- Grassroots resistance to the pipe- New Hampshire student activists gather in Bedford to demand that Bank in chalk along the sidewalk near the er big banks that it is unacceptable line is growing across the country, of America stop funding the fossil fuel industry. - Courtesy photo. bank. to profit off of the destruction of day by day. Actions in opposition Nikhil Chavda, sophomore at the climate. Individuals in positions will continue to be organized, and are. This action was one of many, banks to Defund Line 3 pipeline. Coe Brown Academy and organizer of power have failed to protect the the corporations funding such de- and we will continue to fight until Learn more about the national coa- of the event says: “Bank of America climate and it is now up to ordinary struction of the planet will be target- big banks stop funding the fossil fuel lition here: https://actionnetwork.org/ lends money to fossil fuel companies people to make the changes nec- ed. Bank of America is not innocent, industry, and the building of Line 3 event_campaigns/defundline3-glob- that build pipelines such as Line 3 essary in the time we have left. We and the youth of New Hampshire in Minnesota. This action is a part al-day-of-action. in Minnesota. Between 2016 and demand that the people in power will not stand to pretend that they of a global day of action to call on –=≈=–
to power outages and contributes to use during the period 1977-2017, Clean energy technologies can benefit us - but we need a strategy! cleaner air. an amount that is 30 times the en- The physics behind combustion ergy generated by renewable energy erry Seinfeld once said: “No one already has the technologies it needs Four hundred thousand Massachu- remains the same regardless of fuel sources. Small efficiency technolo- likes change except a wet baby.” to begin. Below we explore benefi- setts homes will get their electricity efficiency. For every gallon of gas gies are available today. MostJ of us would just as soon avoid cial existing technologies available from an offshore wind project ap- burned, about 20 pounds of CO2 Cold beverages, hot showers, and change but, like it or not, the fossil now—provided we have supportive proved just this month. is released into the air. In addition reliable transportation must and will fuels to which we’re accustomed state strategies. Roof top, community, or utility to reducing vehicle miles traveled, still be there in 2030. But supportive are a dying breed. Science says we Heating and cooling accounts for scale solar energy is being deployed or trading in for a more efficient state strategies are essential to meet- must cut emissions pollution in half of all residential energy con- and demand is growing (prices have vehicle, driving an electric car (e.g a ing efficiency, renewable, and emis- half by 2030. Fortunately, we are in sumption. Less than a generation fallen 45 percent over the past five new F150-Lightning truck!) is how sions targets. Are you interested in the midst of dramatic technologi- ago electric heat pumps were a poor years). Trade in your oil-fired hot individuals can make the biggest cleaner air, new transportation solu- cal innovations that allow us to use alternative for New Hampshire, be- water heater for an efficient elec- difference. When more EVs enter tions, buttoning up your home or non-polluting renewable energy cause heat pump efficiency crashed tric one and presto—free hot water the market with attractive incen- business, and increasing renewable efficiently at affordable prices. The with colder temperatures. Today’s powered by panels and no house- tives, people will want this proven energy options and reliability? Make three main components of this ener- heat pumps can provide heat even hold emissions! technology. your comments known. Every three gy transition are efficiency, electrici- when outside temperatures dip as We’ll need energy storage to We must deploy more “Large years New Hampshire must update ty, and renewable energy sources. low as -15 Fahrenheit. And this grow renewables in New Hamp- Clean Energy Technologies.” But its “10-Year State Energy Strategy.” Nationwide renewable electricity technology offers heating in win- shire. Advances in technology are an equally intensive effort must be The Governor’s Office of Strategic generation has nearly doubled over ter and efficient air conditioning in bringing battery storage to con- made to drive demand down for Initiatives is about to begin updating the last decade; close to 90 percent of summer. sumers today: lithium-ion batteries heating oil, natural gas, gasoline and the 2018 strategy and is accepting the expansion has come from wind Progress in recent years has are now 73 percent cheaper than electricity - by doubling down on public comment until June 4. Pub- and solar. The technologies avail- helped make the case for offshore six years ago. Storage facilitates can energy efficiency and weatherization lic comment can be sent to OSI by able to New Hampshire a decade wind even stronger. The federal eventually squeeze out coal and gas of homes. Efficiency can emerge email: [email protected]. ago are nothing like those today. commitment to 30,000 MW by fueled power plants. Battery storage from “Smaller Common-Sense Roger Stephenson, Northeast Re- And while emerging technologies 2030 is huge and important for New is available to homes and business- Home Improvement Technologies” gional Advocacy Director, Union of like renewables-based hydrogen Hampshire. (At full power, one 13 es and can be developed at “utility purchased at local hardware stores. Concerned Scientists and long duration energy storage MW turbine provides a household’s scale” too. Storage lowers residential Efficiency measures have resulted Rep. Peter Somssich, District 27/ show potential, New Hampshire daily electricity in under 7 seconds!) electric bills, strengthens resilience in a 43 percent reduction of energy Portsmouth
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Change is driven by the young, not us grizzled elders by Jean Stimmell mind me of Archie Bunker, the star appointment with the incomplete of that seminal TV sitcom “All In work of the civil rights movement.” ecently I wrote in this space The Family,” which ran in the 1970s. Understanding that racism is struc- about how humans are born Archie attempts to indoctrinate his tural rather than just a matter of per- Rinto this world unfinished, requiring family into his old-school, patriar- sonal bigotry was ahead of its time a long childhood to learn the norms chal worldview, but his daughter back then but is now conventional and practices of their particular and her boyfriend are having no wisdom, except for flame-throwers community. For the community to part of it. Neither are the young to- on the right.4 thrive, what we pass on to our chil- day. Our children are our designated dren must change in step with soci- This brings me to House Bill 544, drivers of change, especially crucial etal changes. which would prohibit educators resources today as we face unprec- This unparalleled ability to from teaching about systemic rac- edented upheavals in society, tech- change, as psychologist Alison Go- ism and sexism in public schools. It nology, and the environment. For pnik tells us, “is the most distinctive seeks to limit public schools from the next generation to safely steer and unchanging thing about us, al- discussing topics related to racism us toward a livable and just future, lowing us to thrive no matter what and sexism; in particular, it would they must be well versed in critical challenging circumstances we had ban teaching whether we are rac- thinking and relational skills, not to face over our long evolutionary ist or sexist, either as a state or a indoctrinated into the dysfunctional history.”1 country. As the sponsor, Rep. Keith gruel of the present. The stakes are But societal change isn’t driven Ammon, who introduced the bill, high if we want to escape the fate of by our grizzled elders but by our explained, “If that’s the assumption the dodo bird. children. As sociologists like Tres- we are going to make as a society, –=≈=– sie Cottom tell us: “Almost all real then we are never going to get to 1 The Philosophical Baby by Alison change that happens is when a new unity.”3 Gopnik. Farrar, Straus & Giroux: generation comes along.” 2 They are That sounds to me like something New York: 2009, Page 7 the ones able to think outside the Archie Bunker 2 https://www.nytimes. box of what is. would say to com/2021/04/13/podcasts/ez- We see that happening today with his family: If ra-klein-podcast-tressie-mcmil- young people who are celebrating you would just © Jean Stimmell lan-cottom-transcript.html diversity by embracing previously shut up and do 3 https://www.concordmonitor.com/ marginalized folks and expressing things my way, Protester at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial, during the Women’s March, Education-bill-would-ban-teach- their openness to discussing unsa- we would have Washington D.C.March 9, 1986. CC Jean Stimmell. ing-racism-sexism-38821767 vory aspects of our national past in unity. Lucki- 4 https://www.nytimes. order to find a better way forward. ly, his children Vietnam. Needless to say, they pre- In fact, as Michelle Goldberg com/2021/02/26/opinion/speech-rac- On the other hand, Republicans tuned him vailed. That’s a good illustration of writes in the New York Times, “Many ism-academia.html in our legislature are, on average, old out and opted instead for diversi- how change was brought about by of the intellectual currents that –=≈=– in body and spirit, clinging to the ty: standing up for feminism, civil the young during those turbulent would become critical race theory past and resisting change. They re- rights, and against an unjust war in times. emerged in the 1970s out of dis-
The Plutocrats Cry, People Cheer –=≈=– by Jim Hightower House, Joe Biden, intends to jack up one percent. The next day, they That’s why there are broad and their corporate tax rate. bounced right back, and they’re still deep public majorities—even utrageous,” screeched the But wait didn’t Trump and the booming. among Republicans—for Biden’s U.S. Chamber of Com- GOP Congress slash the corporate Moreover, those are crocodile infrastructure plan and the taxes to “Omerce. “It doesn’t feel fair,” whim- share of our nation’s upkeep nearly tears the rich are shedding, for they pay for it. For more information go pered a top corporate executive. in half just four years ago, shifting know that—as Biden himself makes to AmericansForTaxFairness.org. The wailing by those who run the burden to the middle class and clear—his proposed uptick in their –=≈=– corporate America is not for the poor? Yes. And didn’t they promise tax share “is not going to affect their Populist author, public speaker, and plight of the workaday families that those cuts would create millions standard of living at all. Not a little radio commentator Jim Hightower who’ve seen their incomes stagnate of new jobs? Yes, again—yet corpo- tiny bit.” They’ll still have their two writes The Hightower Lowdown, a and even plummet to zero during rations got richer and working stiffs or three big houses, private jets, and monthly newsletter chronicling the the past months of the coronavirus got shafted. yachts. But, with them paying just ongoing fights by America’s ordinary pandemic. Rather, this chorus of Still, here they come again, howl- a bit more toward the Common people against rule by plutocratic elites. woe comes from powerful pluto- ing that raising corporate taxes Good, our country will be able to Sign up at HightowerLowdown.org. cratic interests that have been enjoy- would crash the stock market. Well, reinvest in society’s physical and hu- –=≈=– ing windfall profits. Why? Because, the day Biden announced his plan, man infrastructure, making Ameri- they cry, that meanie in the White stock prices did fall…by less than ca stronger and fairer for all. –=≈=– North River Woodworks City Brewery, 1850-1880, For Sale ASE Master Techs, Free Loaners 418 Spring St. Portsmouth, NH — (603) 682-4443 3 mins. from downtown Portsmouth Galena, Il 61036 Local Craftsmanship call (815) 238-2939
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Pay is $10.25 – $10.75/hr. Please contact Ashley at (603) 568-4930 or [email protected] for more information. Granite State Independent Living is looking to add caring and compas- sionate individuals who are interested in making a difference in people’s lives as a Personal Care Attendant. Duties include: personal care, housekeeping, Alternative Clothing & Goods lifting, transfers, errand and grocery 33 Vaughan Mall • Portsmouth, NH 03801 • (603) 431-2243 shopping. We offer a flexible schedule and paid training. Page 8 — The New Hampshire Gazette, Friday, May 21, 2021 Admiral Fowle’s Piscataqua River Tidal Guide (Not for Navigational Purposes)
Portsmouth, arguably the first whom you choose to believe. drags about seventeen billion moves from the mouth of the Twice a day, too, the moon lets all Badger’s Island, bobbing around in and bridges work their hardest. town in this country not founded The Piscataqua’s ferocious current gallons of seawater — enough to river, up past New Castle, around that water go. All the seawater that the current. It weighs several tons, Ships coming in laden with coal, by religious extremists, is bounded is caused by the tide, which, in fill 2,125,000 tanker trucks — up the bend by the old Naval Prison, just fought its way upstream goes and it bobs and bounces in the oil, and salt do so at high tide, for on the north and east by the turn, is caused by the moon. The the river and into Great Bay. This under Memorial Bridge, past the back home to the ocean. This is current like a cork. more clearance under their keels. Piscataqua River, the second, third, other player is a vast sunken valley creates a roving hydraulic conflict, tugboats, and on into Great Bay. when the Piscataqua earns its title The river also has its placid mo- They leave empty, riding high in or fourth fastest-flowing navigable — Great Bay — about ten miles as incoming sea and the outgoing This can best be seen when the tide for xth fastest current. Look for the ments, around high and low tides. the water, at low tide, to squeeze river in the country, depending on upriver. Twice a day, the moon river collide. The skirmish line is rising. red buoy, at the upstream end of When the river rests, its tugboats under Memorial Bridge. Sunday, May 23 Monday, May 24 Tuesday, May 25 Wednesday, May 26 Thursday, May 27 Friday, May 28 Saturday, May 29
2012—A mentally-unstable PNSY 2005—“See,” mansplains G.W.[MD] 2020—George Perry Floyd, Jr., dead 2004—The NY Times admits that its 2017—It’s the last “Last Call” at 2009—Jonathan Trappe crosses the 2020—A U.S. President, frightened employee sets a fire that destroys the Bush, “in my line of work you got to at 46 in Minneapolis. Rest in Power. pre-war Iraq coverage was “not as rig- Portsmouth’s Coat of Arms. English Channel suspended from a by a protest against the police killing billion-dollar U.S.S. Miami. keep repeating things over and over 2007—As U. Mass. hands an honor- orous as it should have been.” 1994—Charles Rodman Campbell cluster of 54 multicolored balloons. of George Floyd, hides for an hour in 1976—The Washington Post reports and over again for the truth to sink in, ary degree to Andrew Card, George 1989—Future Veep J. Danforth does his best to dodge it, but Wash- 1987—W. German Mathias Rust, 19, the White House bunker. that Rep. Wayne L. Hays’ (D-Ohio) to kind of catapult the propaganda.” W.[MD] Bush’s ex-Chief of Staff, Quayle predicts, “We are on an irre- ington State’s hangman finally man- lands a rented Cessna in Red Square. 2017—A U.S. President asks an aide, mistress, on his payroll at $14,000 a 2000—Linda Tripp beats a wiretap students and faculty howl and boo. versible trend toward more freedom and ages to get a noose around his neck. 1986—The Energy Dept. calls off a at a Memorial Day observance, “I year, admits she “can’t type…can’t file, rap; if you’re a Right Winger, igno- 1988—Evicted from his crypt, Peter democracy, but that could change.” 1972—Nixon’s “Plumbers” fail a sec- search for a high-level nuclear waste don’t get it. What was in it for them?” [and] can’t even answer the phone.” rance of the law is an excuse. Lawford’s ashes are scattered at sea; 1972—Nixon’s “Plumbers” first effort ond time trying to break into Demo- dump which had been considering a 2015—The Washington Post prints 1971—President Nixon meets with 1989—Being killed by Texas state the National Enquirer covers the cost to gain entry to Democratic National cratic National HQ at the Watergate. site in southwestern New Hampshire. ex-Gov. John H. Sununu’s confession the milk cartel. For a $2 million cam- employees, Stephen McCoy has a vi- of the boat—none of his children will. HQ at the Watergate fails. 1962—To clear an underground land- 1972—Third time’s a charm for Nix- that in 1988 he bartered state assets— paign contribution, he OKs a $100 olent drug reaction. A male witness 1986—“Hands Across America” ends 1970—The destroyerU.S.S. Richard fill, Centralia, Pa. officials set a fire. It on’s “Plumbers,” finally breaking into low numbered license plates—to buy million increase in the cost of milk. faints, knocking over another witness. hunger and homelessness. Well done! B. Anderson’s departure for Vietnam spreads to a coal seam, forcing aban- DNC HQ in the Watergate Hotel. support for G.H.[H.]W. Bush. 1969—Drunk, homesick U.S.A.F. 1978—Pistol-packin’ Barbara Ann 1981—Kennebunkport native Dan is delayed due to sabotage by the crew. donment of the town 30 years later. 1962—The stock market plummets 2008—Senator (and candidate) John Sgt. Paul Meyer steals a C-130 from Oswald skyjacks Allen Barklage’s Goodwin, 25, scales Chicago’s Sears 1947—An FBI memo duly notes that The fire still burns. 5.7 percent, the worst drop since 1929. McCain [R-Ariz.] says “Mosul is qui- Mildenhall, UK and heads for Lang- helicopter to spring airliner skyjacker Tower while dressed as Spiderman. It’s a Wonderful Life is communistic. 1959—NBC’s Today Show reports 1959—The U.S. Army sends Able and et” on a day when 30 die there. ley, Va. He crashes into the English Garrett B. Trapnell from the Marion, 1979—Sitting in “Old Sparky,” wait- 1938—The House Un-American straight-faced on the Society for Inde- Baker, two monkeys, into space. 2002—FBI head Robert Mueller says Channel—possibly shot down. Ill. pen. Bold Barklage grabs Oswald’s ing for the juice, John Spenkelink says, Activities Committee begins carrying cency to Naked Animals’ campaign to 1946—The Pentagon begins working 9/11 might have been preventable. 1950—The UAW and GM sign the gun, though, and shoots her dead. “Capital punishment: them without out its un-American activities. clothe quadrupeds. on a long-range bomber to be powered 2001—The Bush twins, charged with Treaty of Detroit. Workers get better 1971—After a ski pole punctures his the capital get the punishment.” 1937—Ford’s thugs beat hell out of 1944—NBC censors Eddie Cantor: by a nuclear reactor; 15 years and $8 underage boozing, plead nolo. benefits but give up all hope of power heart in a fall from a ski lift, actor Clint 1953—At the Nevada Test Site, the Walter Reuther and three union col- his song, “We’re Having a Baby, My billion later it’s declared impractical. 1992—In Gibsonton, Fla., “Lobster over corporate decisions. Walker is declared dead. A dissenting U.S. fires a 15-kt nuclear warhead from leagues in the “Battle of the Overpass.” Baby and Me” is too lewd for the tube. 1871—In Père Lachaise cemetery, Boy” Grady Stiles Jr. is murdered by a 1939—U.S.S. Squalus sinks off the M.D. postpones his death to 2018. a cannon called “Atomic Annie,” previ- 1934—The Burlington dieselZephyr’s 1941—Biplanes sink the Bismark. French soldiers restore proper order by hit man hired by his family. Isles of Shoals with 59 aboard. Within 1964—Barry Goldwater says let’s use ously seen at Ike’s Inaugural Parade. first run spells doom for steam. 1940—As Brits evacuate Dunkirk, massacring 147 Communards. 1987—Michael Jackson attempts to 40 hours, 33 are rescued, but 26 die. nukes in South Vietnam. 1950—A speeding Green Hornet 1924—Congress establishes quotas Captain Jack Churchill drops a Nazi 1868—“I like an Indian better dead buy the Elephant Man’s bones. 1934—Cops in Louisiana ambush and 1961—Law-abiding Freedom Riders streetcar in Chicago collides with a on immigrants: whites are alright, of with an arrow from his longbow. than living,” Delegate James M. Cav- 1968—Charles deGaulle flees the kill Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow. are arrested in Jackson, Miss. as per gasoline truck, killing 34. course, but “Orientals” are banned. 1923—Arch-fiend Heinz Alfred enaugh [D-Mont.] tells Congress, “I Paris insurgency. In Baden-Baden, Their bodies are mauled by gawkers as agreement between Sen. James East- 1928—After circling the North Pole, 1916—Louis Thomas “Moondog” Kissinger is born in Fürth, Bavaria. have never…seen a good Indian… French General J. Massu advises him, they get hauled through town, dead, in land and A.G. Bobby Kennedy. Umberto Nobile’s airship Italia crash- Hardin, composer, street musician, 1902—Luna Park’s owners poison except…a dead Indian.” “You’re in the shit and you have to stay their shot-up Ford V-8. 1959—The first home bomb shelter is es northeast of Spitsbergen. Eight and Viking-helmet-wearing blind then electrocute Topsy the Elephant. 1830—Andy Jackson says all Indians in it a bit longer.” He returns. 1930—Serial killer Carl Panzram shown in Pleasant Hills, Pa. crew members survive on the ice; six eccentric, is born. Edison’s cameras film the event. must move west of the Mississippi. 1953—Tenzing Norgay and Edmund writes to the Society for the Abolition of 1861—Shot while removing a Rebel vanish as the balloon drifts away. 1647—In Hartford, Conn., where the 1702—“I am about to—or I am going 1754—Tanacharison, scout for Lieu- Hillary top Everest. Capital Punishment, “I wish you all had flag from a hotel roof in Alexandria, 1920—At a parochial school in State House now stands, Alice “Alse” to—die;” says French grammarian tenant Colonel George Washington, 1941—Disgruntled Disney cartoon- one neck and that I had my hands on it.” Va., Colonel Elmer Ellsworth, friend Hampton, Nebraska, Robert T. Mey- Young becomes the first American Dominique Bouhours, “either expres- murders the wounded Joseph Coulon ists vote to go out on strike. 1908—In Calif., 16 passengers sur- of Abe Lincoln, becomes the first er is arrested for teaching German. hanged for witchcraft. sion is used.” de Jumonville near Fort Necessity. The 1932—WW I “Bonus Marchers” be- vive a fall from an exploding dirigible. Union officer to die in the Civil War. 1826—Hooligans in Chepatchet, 1637—At Mystic, Conn., Captains 1541—Margaret Pole, 67, 8th Count- French and Indian War ensues. gin arriving in Washington, D.C. 1849—In Haverhill, N.H., thou- 1824—More hours for less pay? No— R.I. test Hachaliah Bailey’s claim that John Mason and John Underhill set ess of Salisbury, tries to dodge the ax 1291—The Templars lose Acre; Holy 1922—The Supreme Court rules that sands watch as Rev. Enos Dudley is 102 women and girls in Pawtucket his elephant, “Old Betty,” has bullet- fire to the Pequots’ fort, burning alive in the Tower of London. It only makes Land Crusades end, a century after baseball is not a business and is there- hanged for strangling his wife. hold the U.S.’s first industrial strike. proof hide. He was lying, she does not. about 600 men, women, and children. things worse; the job takes 12 strokes. Richard I’s slaughter of 2,600 captives. fore exempt from anti-trust laws. 9:03 9:28 9:59 10:19 10:53 11:08 11:46 11:58 12:39 12:49 1:32 1:41 2:26
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2019—The state Senate overrides 2020—Irene Triplett, the last recip- 2005—Having wrecked Iraq, Paul 2016—Two sisters at air shows watch 2009—New Hampshire becomes the 2017—It’s the last “Last Call” at 2013—News outlets reveal that the Gov. Sununu’s veto: New Hampshire’s ient of a Civil War pension (via her Wolfowitz turns to the World Bank. as planes crash: Cindy Estevane-Vil- first state to legalize same-sexmar - Portsmouth’s Press Room. NSA, under a Top Secret court order, out of the killing business—except for pop), dies at 90 in Wilkesboro, N.C. 2002—George W.[MD] Bush an- lavicencio in Colorado and Kristyn riage without a court order. 2006—A Ukrainian man enters the has been Hoovering™ up the phone that one Black guy on death row. 2009—Dr. George Tiller, ushering in nounces at West Point that we’ll at- Lockwood in Georgia; a Thunderbird 2002—Egypt says it warned the U.S., lion cage at the Kiev zoo, saying “God records of millions of Americans. 2007—Florida man Dale Rippy, a a Wichita, Kansas church, is shot dead tack pre-emptively if he feels like it. pilot lives, a Blue Angel dies. a week before 9/11, that al-Qaeda was will save me, if he exists.” He does not. 2008—Despite Mayoral objections ’Nam vet, is attacked by a rabid bobcat. to uphold the sanctity of life. 1980—Ted Turner launches CNN— 2002—The CIA admits to Con- about to strike the U.S. 2004—Marvin Heemeyer destroys and a lack of public hearings, Black- He strangles it with bare hands. 2007—New Hampshire becomes the the 24-hour news cycle has begun. gress—in a classified document, to 1983—In Medina, N.D., “Greatest the Granby, Colo. Town Hall, the water opens a training facility in San 1962—Missionary Archie E. Mitch- first state to honor same-sex unions 1971—The N.Y. Times swallows avoid undue alarm—it had tracked Generation” veteran, Posse Comitatus mayor’s home, and 11 other buildings Diego; a judge says Blackwater’s a per- ell, sole survivor of a Bly, Ore. picnic without court intervention. Chuck Colson’s bait: a “vets group” he one 9/11 hijacker months earlier than co-founder, and anti-tax crank Gor- with his home-made armored bull- son whose rights mustn’t be violated. devastated by a Japanese fire balloon, 2005—Ex-FBI official Mark Felt -ad created says that it backs the war. it had previously admitted. don Kahl dies in a shootout with the dozer because “God has asked me to 2003—Two top New York Times ed- is captured, along with two others, by mits he is “Deep Throat.” 1967—Disgruntled vets form Viet- 1999—The Virginian-Pilot reports FBI, having slain five U.S. Marshals. do this.” Then he shoots himself. itors resign in disgrace. Curiously, the Viet Cong. He’s never seen again. 1989—House Speaker Jim Wright, nam Veterans Against the War. that evangelist Pat Robertson has had 1980—A failed 46-cent computer 2003—Feds get tough on white collar many more do not. 1961—Plotters using CIA-supplied as he is hounded from that office, calls 1954—The AEC pulls the security “extensive dealings” with Liberian chip briefly convinces NORAD that crime, i.e., Martha Stewart. 1989—One man, for a while, stops a weapons assassinate Rafael Trujillo. for an end to “mindless cannibalism.” clearance of Manhattan Project boss war criminal Charles Taylor. 220 Soviet missiles are incoming. 1989—The Peoples Liberation Army line of tanks in Tiananmen Square. They fail to neutralize his secret police, 1921—A Black WW I veteran in J. Robert Oppenheimer. 1976—Don Bolles, investigative 1974—Brown & Williamson tests a kills thousands at Tiananmen Square. 1976—In Idaho, the $100 million though, and will pay with their lives. Tulsa refuses a demand to surrender 1950—Maine’s Margaret C. Smith reporter for the Arizona Republic, is cigarette blended to smell like pot. 1963—Allen Ginsberg visits Saigon federal Teton Dam fails, killing 14 1937—Police attack strikers at Re- his pistol. During a struggle it fires; a asks fellow Republicans to renounce mortally injured by a bomb under his 1969—In the South China Sea, a nav- to assess the political situation. and causing $2 billion in damages. public Steel in Chicago: 10 are shot massive “race war” ensues. the “Four Horsemen of Calumny– car. Two guys take falls. igational mistake takes the destroyer 1962—A failing Thor rocket is blown 1969—Taken three weeks earlier, at dead, 55 hospitalized, 30 wounded. 1921—The mistrial of Sacco and Van- Fear, Ignorance, Bigotry, and Smear.” 1972—Alfred W. McCoy explains to U.S.S. Evans under the bow of the car- up over the South Pacific; the first a cost of 72 American lives and 372 1927—In Queens, N.Y., Fred Trump, zetti begins under Judge Webster “Did She is duly punished by them. Congress that top South Vietnamese rier HMAS Melbourne. The bow of the U.S. high-altitude nuke test flops. Purple Hearts, Ap Bia Mountain, aka father of The Donald, is arrested for you see what I did with those anarchis- 1923—Maine Gov. Percival P. Baxter officials, the CIA, and the Mafia are Evans sinks with 73 of her crew. “The 1951—The Supreme Court overrules Hamburger Hill, is abandoned. “refusing to disperse” from a KKK pa- tic bastards the other day?” Thayer. orders state flags lowered to half-staff all in the heroin racket together. Wall” does not include their names. Commies’ rights to free speech. 1968—RFK is fatally shot in Los An- rade that devolved into a riot. 1916—The Battle of Jutland begins: to honor the death of his dog, Garry. 1971—“Treating [the press] with 1961—Henry R. Marshall, inves- 1944—For the first time a subma- geles. The LAPD convinces the gull- 1922—The Lincoln Memorial is ded- 151 British ships, including 28 bat- 1921—Tulsa’s whites use planes to considerably more contempt,” Nixon tigating LBJ’s pal Billy Sol Estes rine—U505—is captured and board- ible that Sirhan Sirhan did it. icated. The ceremony is segregated. tleships, against 99 Germans (16 bat- firebomb the wealthy Black neigh- writes to Haldeman, “is in the long for the Agriculture Department, is ed on the high seas. 1967—The Supreme Court rules that 1854—President Franklin Pierce tleships). The results are inconclusive, borhood of Greenwood into oblivion, run a more productive policy.” found with five .22 slugs in him from 1943—GIs in a fleet of cabs roam fire departments cannot randomly in- [D-N.H.] signs the Kansas-Nebraska except for the 8,645 dead sailors. murdering hundreds in the process. 1919—Anarchist bombs explode in a bolt-action rifle. Verdict: “suicide.” downtown L.A. searching for and spect business enterprises. Act, which he also co-wrote. It leads 1889—A shoddy dam belonging to 1918—Advised by a retreating French eight cities. Attorney General Mitch- 1947—At West Point, 56 years before beating up Mexican Americans. 1967—Israel attacks Egypt and Syria. directly to “Bleeding Kansas.” the South Fork Fishing and Hunting officer at Belleau Woods to turn back, ell Palmer’s D.C. home is nearly de- #43 preemptively attacks Iraq, #34 1939—TheSt. Louis, with 915 Jewish The Six Day War begins. 1806—Andy Jackson, dueling, takes Club (Andrew Carnegie, Andrew U.S.M.C. Capt. Lloyd Williams re- stroyed; the bomber’s body parts land tells graduates, “War is mankind’s refugees aboard, is turned away from 1965—The State Department admits a bullet near his heart, aims carefully, Mellon, &.) collapses upstream of plies, “Retreat? Hell, we just got here.” across the street on FDR’s stoop. most tragic and stupid folly; to seek Florida; 254 will be killed by Nazis. that U.S. troops are engaged in com- and shoots Charles Dickinson dead. Johnstown, Pa. Roughly 2,200 die; 1857—The American Party sends 1855—Reacting to a newspaper or advise its deliberate provocation is 1919—U.S. Marines invade Costa bat in Vietnam. 1783—America’s 1st daily, The Penn- unscathed, the owners pay $0. Baltimore’s Plug Uglies to disrupt report, a mob breaks into Portland, a black crime against all men.” Rica “to protect American interests.” 1943—GIs and zoot-suited Hispanics sylvania Evening Post, begins. 1779—General George Washington municipal elections in D.C. To restore Maine’s City Hall in search of rum 1924—RIP Franz Kafka; last words: 1917—President Woodrow Wil- rumble all over Los Angeles. 1741—N.Y.C. burns 13 Black men at orders New Hampshire’s Gen. John order President Buchanan calls out the bought on orders from Mayor Neal “Kill me, or else you are a murderer!” son—a Democrat—tells the Jus- 1862—France gains sovereignty over the stake and hangs 21 men and wom- Sullivan to bring “destruction…dev- Marines, who shoot 10 citizens dead. Dow, author of the state’s prohibition 1678—In Portsmouth, New Hamp- tice Department to issue badges to three Vietnamese provinces under the en, Black and white, for planning a astation [and] total ruinment” to the 1660—Mary Dyer is hanged in Bos- law. Dow orders militia to fire on the shire, tything men are appointed “to 200,000 jingoistic civilians in the Treaty of Saigon and the time-hon- revolt against slavery. Haudenosaunee [Iroquois]. He does. ton for her Quaker beliefs. crowd; one man, a sailor, is shot dead. inspect the neighbor’s families.” American Protective League. ored principle that might makes right. 2:35 3:22 3:32 4:21 4:32 5:22 5:36 6:23 6:41 7:23 7:44 8:18 8:43 9:08
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