A Day with the Mountain: Phenomenology, Wonder, and Freeskiing
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A Day with the Mountain: Phenomenology, Wonder, and Freeskiing By John Coleman DISSERTATION SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILLMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY in the Faculty of Education © John Coleman, Ottawa, Canada, 2012 UNIVERSITY OF OTTAWA 2012 ii A Day With The Mountain: Phenomenology, Wonder, and Freeskiing “Why the word spiritual? Well I don’t know any other word to describe an experience that has so much power and gives so much love” -Mark Abma (Freeskier) iii Abstract A Day With The Mountain is an inquiry that ventures into the experience of self-movement through the context of freeskiing. This inquiry focuses on both my experience with three freeskiers; Leah Evans, Josh Dueck, and Mark Abma and my personal experience with freeskiing. The intention behind this inquiry is to challenge, celebrate, and evoke the self- movement experience in order to gain understandings of something so fundamental to human development. This intention is met by asking the main research question; ‘What is the experience of self-movement?’ Self-movement was fleshed out in this inquiry within a phenomenological approach. Phenomenology aims to evoke human experience through descriptive writing, which also proved to be the main challenge of this study. Stories, poetry, and images within a narrative entitled A Day With The Mountain were used to address this challenge and to invite the reader into deeply textured experiences of self-movement. A Day With The Mountain is a day of freeskiing where accumulation, threshold, breakthrough, and release make up the rhythms of the experience; these same rhythms also serve as the chapters of this text. Woven within the evocative writing of the experience of freeskiing are theoretical insights into self-movement, movement itself, of wonder. Emerging from this inquiry are ideas and questions about self-movement and movement that challenge the ground of formal physical education. I sense a potential pedagogical approach that combines movement, self-movement, and wonder as presented in this text. The emerging pedagogical approach focuses on evoking wonder, situates movement as a realm of possibility, and self-movement as possible freedom. The margins of self-movement and movement itself remain beyond the horizon of this text, and those margins are in need of more evocative description. Continuing to inquire into self-movement may reveal new possibilities and expanded understandings of self-movement, which may have significant pedagogical potential. Key words: self-movement, movement, wonder, phenomenology, and writing. iv To Siri…from love, to love, in love. v Acknowledgements A strong spring breeze swirls through the Bow Valley ruffling my writing paper. The towering peaks of the Rocky Mountains stand in front of me as the remaining snow from the winter melts in the warm afternoon sun. I sit on my back porch inhaling the spring air and am filled with gratitude for this moment. This mountain scene seems like an appropriate space to acknowledge those who have contributed to this research that has been so powerfully influenced by these very mountains. Since the beginning of the journey of creating this text, I have been motivated to experience the world differently. This opening of experience has at its core an opening in me with relation to self-movement, movement, and wonder. I now experience the world anew because of this project and it would not have been possible without the support, compassionate challenge, and guidance of the following people: Dr. Pierre Boudreau who supervised my wondering and wandering in movement. Pierre, the words to describe the depth of my appreciation for you reside in silence, stillness, and invisibility…they cannot be spoken, moved, or written; they can only be felt. I can only hope you feel the deep appreciation I have for you. I would like to express deep gratitude to Dr. Barbara Graves for her support, guidance, and belief in me. Barbara, thank-you for contributing to the supervision of my work with such care and integrity; I cherish and am inspired by your ability to balance academic earnestness and playfulness. To Dr. Pat Palulis, Dr. Penny Werthner, and Dr. Awad Ibrahim, thank you for your efforts as the committee members of this research. You succeeded in inviting and guiding me to the cliff edge of my abilities, in pushing me off, and then in catching me before I crashed completely. My sincerest gratitude for the three of you. I am very grateful to Leah, Josh, and Mark for co-creating this project with the experiences you all shared with me. I am grateful that you not only gave permission but were also excited to have your names, stories, and photos included in the text. Perhaps more importantly, however, I am grateful that you three continue to find freedom in movement by fueling your wonder by risking something, being vulnerable to the unknown and, in doing so, bringing to life new experiences of self-movement. To my mountain friends; Keith, Cory (the Condor), Kristy, Ty, Michelle, Kendra, Andy, Sarah, Evan…mmmmmmmmmm drop! Of my mountain friends I have to write a special acknowledgement for Dave. Busch-man, we’ve shared many experiences in the mountains…from three-sixties to attempted misty’s, pungee jumpin’ to pow huntin’, broken skis and your broken spleen. All the experiences we’ve shared together are present in this text in one way or another. Thank you for your friendship; it extends beyond the scope of the mountain herself. vi To Adam, Ad-rock you’re a full-spectrum friend that continues to open my heart to a life of love. Jah! To my family, my parents Anne and Paul, my siblings Elle-J, Rianna banana, Porchie-Poo, and Stevie-wonder. I love you all! Thanks to the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council, the University of Ottawa faculty of Education, and the University of Ottawa in general for all the support you have given me. And finally to Siri. This project is dedicated to you because the most wonderful, magical, and mysterious possibilities of movement live in you. Thank you for sharing your magic with the world…and I am so blessed that you choose to share it with me. You break me open, and I love you. vii Table of Contents Title Page ..............................................................................................................................ii Abstract................................................................................................................................iii Dedication............................................................................................................................iv Acknowledgements...............................................................................................................v Table of Contents................................................................................................................vii Trail Map: Topography of the (Con)textual Terrain.............................................................1 A Spiritual Connection, An Impulse, and An Intention For Inquiry.............................................2 Entering The Terrain of A Day With The Mountain .....................................................................3 The Line ......................................................................................................................................16 Accumulation: The Swelling Energy of Ascension ...........................................................22 The White Breath ........................................................................................................................23 Movement: Its First Rush and its Primacy .................................................................................26 Forming Movement: Continuation and Development ................................................................32 Continued Accumulation: Leah’s Experience ............................................................................38 An Eternal Search: A Search for Words .....................................................................................45 Ascending the Mountain .............................................................................................................50 Tensions with Freeskiing ............................................................................................................57 The Presence of Words................................................................................................................63 Threshold: Exposed on the Ridge ......................................................................................73 The Razors Edge .........................................................................................................................74 Movement: A Depth and Force of Possibility ............................................................................77 Reflection and Living Experience: Bridging the Ski-Line and Pen-Line ...................................88 Wonder: Pausing and Gazing ......................................................................................................95 Flying or Falling ..........................................................................................................................99 The Freedom and Restriction of Possibility: Josh’s Experience ..............................................106 Breakthrough: The Ineffable Descent...............................................................................118 Release: Letting Go, Celebrating, and Longing to Return................................................128