Page 4 Retriever features New LPs will split your mind open

by Tony Sclafani thoughts of confounding confusion and blind- Once you get past the muddy sound, the ing hate, as she took a kitchen knife in her hand Wombats can be quite entertaining. They have In the universe there now exists four new and entered the room in which her baby sister some mean guitar and rock-hard drumming, "punk psychedelic" , courtesy of Voxx lay sleeping.) and you can really tell because they're mixed up records, and they should make a perfect Christ- The Pandora's LP, entitled It's About Time front. And how can you not like an mas gift for that Ultimate Spinach fan in your adds some new twists to the old girl group which states "Man's own penis inspires him to life. formula. These four girls play tough garage kill," and "Unauthorized duplication is a viola- (You see, through the rainy plexiglass- punk that sounds like a female Kingsmen or tion of...all that is true and good in the world." flavored window pane she saw the four beings Ventures. Look at it this way: if the Go-Go's (All three skipped off merrily to the empty emerge into one, a slice of pizza, ready to be were cotton candy then the Bangles would be library where they saw Sybil Green who had eaten right before the ground beef of your Wheaties, but the Pandora's would be char- lost herself along the shelf. Her long blonde hair mind.) broiled burgers. This isn't an insult to the above shone through the windows like radiation.) The bands are The Eyes of Mind, the Pando- mentioned bands, could you eat grilled ham- Last up are the Things with their too deriva- ra's, the Wombats, and the Things. They are all burgers for breakfast or desert? tive LP, Colored Heaven. The Things beg, bor- Californian bands, similar to Green on Red, the (Upon entering the blue room, she spotted row and steal from the founding fathers of Three O'Clock, or the Dream Syndicate, in the- her grandmother on the floor, left from the without ever making the music ory, but closer to any number of original sixties night before, near the crib. She thought of peace their own. This is driven home by the fact that bands in approach. And speaking of approach, again, Golda Meir, Clairol, cabbage, Spain, the group's remakes of the Stone's "Out of each of these bands has their own unique geiger-counters, angels, and flugelhorns.) Time" and the Yardbirds' "Mr. You're a Better approach to psychedelia. (She stood, confused, stunned, shocked, abandoned, helpless, as her mind split open, slowly dripping blueberry wheat germ eggs onto her mother's freshly waxed floor.) Each of these records update and borrow heavily from the psychedelic era, a time period that has been all too forgotten and misunder- stood in the annals of pop history. Yet along with , was the only popular music form that opened rock to anyone or anything. Original psychedelic music was derived from garage punk anyway, so the styles aren't that far apart. If you have a soft spot in your heart for bands like the Magoos, the Seeds, , H.P. Love- THIS WEEK'S EVENTS craft, Gong, Love, Clear Light, or any of the Nuggets or Pebbles era bands, you might like Tuesday. Dec. 11 these LP's. ("This is a job for Mr. Clean," she thought, as ACLS Retest. 7-10pm, AC 149. she put the self of her pieces back together, and headed for the bedroom door, spurting mental Wednesday, Dec. 12 musk oil out of her jelly notebook.) Delta Phi. 1-2pm, UC 310-311 By now you probably want to know what JSA. 1-2pm, UC 312-313. these bands sound like. Obviously you can't Minority Student Affair-Student Affairs. DH III, 6-9pm. hear them through the paper, but 111 do my best to describe, with words, the sounds these four Never Say Never Agaln-SGA 6-8:10-10:15pm, LH II. bands make. The Eyes of Mind is the best Thursday, Dec. 13 record here although their Tales of the Tur- quoise Umbrella, is just an EP. This band Admission Seminar. 5-9:30pm, UC Ballroom. blends psychedelic awakening with new wave BSU Social. 9pm-1am, Comm. Cafe. eclecticism in almost every song. I mean new Phi Sigma Sigma. 7-10pm, UC 312-313. wave back when it meant music, not a bunch of Kappa Alpha Psl. 8pm-Close, 2nd floor lounge. pretty boys and whores prancing about in ludi- crous clothing. Friday, Dec. 14. (And then, turning slowly, amazingly smooth Phi Slgma-Seml-Formal. 9pm-1am, UC Ballroom. through her perfumed bathrobe she thought of music, and the sounds of the universe, and Unlike the Bangles or Go-Go's, the Pando- Man" are very lame, and don't expand on the The Red Shoes continues. 12/14, 8 pm; 12/15,10:30 am and 2:30 pm; 12/16, peace love, more love and peace and a piece of ra's use organ, not two guitars to fill out their songs despite new recording technology availa- 2:30 pm, Theatre. apple pie, with vanilla ice cream dripping off the sound. They aren't as good musically as those ble. In fact, the arrangement to "Out of Time" is top.) two bands, but they make up for it with their completely dull, a problem exacerbated by the Saturday, Dec. 15 Earlier on I compared these bands with the energy, especially on tunes like "Haunted Beach lack of the Stone's arrangement; marimbas, Candle-Lit Holiday Special By The Camerata-a benefit at the Charlestown Dream Syndicate. Well, the Dream Syndicate Party," and "He's Not Fair." Songs are pub- acoustic guitar, keyboards and fuzz bass. I'm lished by their own Invisible Bikini Music BMI! Chapel, 8pm. can only dream of sounding like The Eyes of talking about the Stones before they became a Mind. The Eyes are not derivative, not boring, It's About Time also offers the grooviest liner singing pharmacy. Sunday, Dec. 16 and not cliche ridden. Hell, they make the notes since The L3th Floor Elevators' first LP. (Sybil kept complaining about how she could Get this: Gwynne Kelly is the socialite Pando- UMBC Symphony at Johns Hopkins Medical Institute, 3pm. Dream Syndicate seem as psychedelic as a ham- hear the grass grow, so they pranced around the burger. The Eyes' EP is a strange blend of key- ra...Gwynne might be found going to the zoo, lemon tree until they found out they had taken Wednesday, December 19. boards, twelve string guitars, and harmonies or watching exploitation movies, one of her too much subliminal sonic laxative. This was favorite pastimes. too much for Brian, so he left to go break into a Women's Classified. 9am-5pm, DH III. which sound very modern in excecution, yet give the overall effect of nostalgia. The liner (Putting down the knife and butter, she calculator. Shortly after, Mike and Sybil went Fri., December 21. notes state "Join the Voxx Rebellion." So join walked outside and spotted her next-door off to move a brontosaurus, and visit an angel, MD. Entomological Society. 7:30-11pm, BS 120. already. neighbor, Mr. Edsilson, mowing the lawn, his who was out herding pigs.) (But soon these thoughts were replaced with wife freshly beaten, lying in a heap in the The Things' originals suffer also. They are garden. "Ho hum," she thought. "This is a uninteresting, which wouldn't be so bad, but middle-class neighborhood, what can we they put them across in an uninteresting way. expect?" Then, she glided along a candy But then turn on the radio and this stuff doesn't wrapper to the river.) seem so bad. And 1 can't knock an album that The Wombats are about as subtle as Charlie states, "Unauthorized duplication...bums our Manson saying "Hello Sharon" for the last trip man." time. This band seems obsessed with mundane (By now she was satisfied, her head filled with (§ib Porto Pakerg images. On Zorttar Must Die they sing about cosmic cupcakes of the uniform. She crossed "Talahassie Lassie," feeling "Insecure," and the cars, returned home, stepped over the everything in between. Their album jacket dis- bodies, went to bed, and dreamed about plays images of Dezi Arnez and Dick Van Christmas...) Dyke. They sound like they were playing in an These four albums represent the vitality of 6210 Eastern avenue underground bathroom while someone American, especially Californian, underground recorded them down the hall with a single mic- rock.- If only Baltimore had a local band scene rophone. Kind of like the Beatles Hamburg as healthy as the ones in L.A., or San Francisco. album, except this is deliberate. Oh well, you can't expect much when most local (Down by the river she saw Michael Mitchell, bands come off like bad Kiss or Billy Idol imita- Baltimore Md. 21224 and Brian was saying, "Michael, if I told tions, while college radio stations play top 40. once I told you a thousand times..." but Mike, (Visions of sugar cubes filled her head. She clad in yellow, denied that was his middle name. dreamed of Rudolph, Little St. Nick, the He went on mumbling about his vintage-dated Abominable Snowman in the supermarket, eight-year old sounding albums, which he had and...) 633—6690 bought a week ago. Then he started to throw Like I said, these discs will make a great gift grapes, but soon stopped when he saw the for the Bubble Puppy fan in your life. Go to unseemly stains they left on her shirt. She your local non-McDonald's record store and debated weeping, but soon retaliated with get them. bombs of Welches. Mike stared at the artistic (...wished a happy Christmas and Hanukkah We Offer: patterns they left on his blue shirt.) to all, and a very good night.) Old Fashioned Sugar Cookies Chocolate Chip Cookies Delicious German Stollen, Torte and Bienenstich Freshly baked Grain and German Sour Dough Bread

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