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The Mission Beyond the Words The Story of a Boy Who Overcame Dyslexia Michael Zarchin The Mission Beyond the Words The STory of a Boy Who overcame DySlexia Zarchin Institute Israel, 2018 The Mission Beyond the Words Michael Zarchin ISBN: 978-965-572-509-4 © Zarchin Institute, 2018 All rights reserved to Michael Zarchin. No part of the text may be reproduced in any form, nor may any page be photographed and reproduced by any means, without the written permission of the publisher. Translated from the Hebrew: Hashlichut She’mever Lamilim, 2005 Translated by Eliezer Shore Set in Arno Pro by Raphaël Freeman, Renana Typesetting Author’s website: www.zarchin.org. Dedicated to the memory of my parents, Emmy and Yosef Zarchin Rabbi Yitzhak said: “If a person tells you: ‘I toiled but did not succeed’ – Do not believe him; ‘I did not toil yet succeeded’ – Do not believe him; ‘I toiled and succeeded’ – Believe him!” Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Megillah 6b Acknowledgments I am grateful to: Rivka Almog, Dr. Orna Ariel- Lenchner, Sarit Blonder, Rabbi Mordechai Gal OBM, Ariel Hertzfeld, Menachem Michelson, Tova Netzer, Prof. Dan Vittorio Segre, Prof. Michael Segre, Yehudit Shabta, Dr. Varda Sharoni, Rabbi Shimon Weitzhandler, and Rabbi Eliezer Shore for their gen- erous help in the preparation of this volume. vii Contents Acknowledgments vii Approbations xi Introduction xv Part I What Is Dyslexia? 3 Leaving School and Returning Home 8 Influential Figures in My Life 12 The Beginning of My Torturous Path 25 An Illusory Peace 29 The Substitute Teacher 34 The Gift of the Sailboat 39 Preparing for the Trip 43 The First Hurdle 56 The Long- Anticipated Encounter 60 Who Are You, Dr. Stanley Abelman? 63 Small Steps, Grand Hopes 69 Getting Down to Work 73 Taking Leave of Dr. Stanley: The Parable of the Date Palm 83 ix Part II Dr. Alan Kaye: Preparing for the Meeting 93 Indecision, and Reconnecting with Dr. Kaye 101 One Eye Cries, While the Other Eye Laughs 110 My Relationship with Dr. Kaye, from His Perspective 117 PART III Reaching Far and Wide: The “No- Method” Method 135 In the Library 145 The Bitter Becomes Sweet 150 Epilogue 154 Appendix I: Summary of the Zarchin Method 157 Appendix II: Two Case Studies 163 Appendix III: Is Dyslexia in the Torah? 169 Appendix IV: Letters 175 Pre-Publication Letters 175 Letters from Dr. Stanley Abelman 181 Letters from Patients 187 x Rabbi Israel Meir Lau Chief Rabbi of Israel President of the Great Rabbinical Court 6 Cheshvan 5762 October 23, 2001 Dear Mr. Zarchin, I read several pages of your book, The Mission Beyond the Words, which opens a window to and sheds light on the world of dyslexia. In leafing through its pages, I discovered a fascinating autobiography, a story paved with difficulties yet crowned with success. The book is written with eloquent profession- alism interwoven with an unswerving faith in the Creator, emphasizing the personal capabilities and willpower that God grants each individual. This singular combination leads to a deep understanding, optimism, and potential for success in contending with this difficulty. Your wealth of experience finds apt expression in the book. What impressed me most was the professional treatment method that you implemented. I have no doubt that your book will greatly contribute to deepening the awareness of and openness to this issue amongst the Israeli public in general, and amongst the reli- gious and ultra- Orthodox sectors, in particular. May you merit great success in your important endeavor. “May the pleasantness of God be upon you, and may He estab- lish the work of your hands.” With deep respect, Israel Meir Lau Chief Rabbi of Israel xi Letter of Approbation from Rabbi Adin Even Israel Steinsaltz 1 Kislev, 5775 November 23, 2014 This book is an autobiography of Michael Zarchin, with whom I have been acquainted for many years. Yet it is not merely the story of his life; it is a quasi-heroic journey of a man born with a severe cognitive impediment, who succeeded – with the help of some very special individuals, coupled with tremendous efforts on his own part – in overcoming it. The book is written simply, without embellishment, thus lending it great credibil- ity. Its great value lies not in the description of the events that took place, but in its ability to offer hope to the many people who are suffering from similar conditions that they, too, can ultimately prevail. In essence, it is a book of heroism and hope. Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz Jerusalem, Israel xiii Introduction As long as I can remember, I have been intrigued by and preoccupied with dyslexia, a condition I suffered from for years, and which, after a long period of denial and repression I finally acknowledged and overcame. I will never forget the day a teenage girl stopped me on the street and asked me if I’d care to make a donation to Nitzan – an organization that aids children suffering from dyslexia. She explained that since the disability is incurable, we have an obligation to help these children accept themselves and learn to live with their impairment. Obviously, I didn’t tell her that my mother was the founder of Nitzan. Yet her words touched a deep chord within me. I looked at her young face and asked myself: How much longer can you go on like this? Aren’t you duty- bound to do something? Even Dr. Abelman, the renowned American expert on learning disabilities, who treated me with remarkable dedica- tion, would often ask me why I did not choose to work with dyslexic children. To my mind, though, the fact that I myself had been dyslexic until adolescence did not necessarily testify to my knowledge or ability to help others. But Dr. Abelman disagreed. The necessary insights were latent within me, he claimed, and the day would eventually come when I would recognize them and put them to good use. xv The Mission Beyond the Words Over the years I grew closer to the practice of Judaism, the religion of my birth, and during the 1980s I was fortunate to have cultivated a close bond to the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneersohn, and to the teachings of Chabad. I forged a deep soul- connection with him, and we corresponded on several topics central to my life. Among other things I revealed to him my painful youth, when I was diagnosed with a learning disability. In one of his letters, the Rebbe wrote me that I should com- mit my story to writing, even granting me his blessing to do so. Yet regrettably, I took no action on the matter at the time. My attitude changed when, quite by chance, I met an artist and gifted performer named Ushi, who told me of his own struggle with dyslexia. When our relationship deepened, I told him that I could help him. Laughing, Ushi said: “In what way are you any better than all the experts who tried to help me, and failed?” I hesitated for a moment. Perhaps Ushi was right; perhaps I was just wasting my time. Should I divulge to him the secret that I had managed to hide for decades? But I answered him: “It doesn’t matter to me who tried to help you, or how. I know that I can help you. Give me a try!” Ushi took me up on my offer and, after a period of working together, was indeed able to free himself from his condition. That was the first time I had ever treated anyone beside myself. I had always felt with every fiber of my being that all the experiences of my youth, coupled with Dr. Abelman’s expertise that had so helped me, would one day merge to become a deeply moving and gratifying occupation. Slowly, cautiously, I began to help another young man and yet another, until I found myself in the thick of the work. Years passed, but I never forgot that sidewalk encounter with the young Nitzan volunteer, nor could I ever forget the xvi Introduction blessing from the Lubavitcher Rebbe. It is for these reasons that I have decided to tell the story of my life. If even one of my readers finds relief and encouragement in my words – if only from one detail of the story – then my efforts will have been justified. For then I will have fulfilled the mission beyond the words. xvii Part I What Is Dyslexia? The term “learning disability” refers to “a heterogeneous group of cognitive disorders that find expression in significant dif- ficulties in the acquisition and use of the powers of speech, listening, reading, writing, and arithmetic.”1 Dyslexia is a specific type of learning disability primarily associated with reading, writing, and spelling difficulties, although some researchers have extended the definition to include difficulties in learning- skills acquisition and mathematics. According to studies conducted abroad, as well as to the testimony of Israeli students, the difficulties faced by dyslexic students fall into five main categories. These difficulties are often present at an even earlier age: 1. Linguistic Difficulties: weak vocabulary; difficulty in grasping things that are said quickly; difficulty in listening to lectures and taking notes simultaneously; difficulties in organizing a plot- line or sequence of ideas; errors in syn- tax and incorrect use of conjunctions; difficulties in word recall, in pronouncing multi- syllabic words, and in learn- 1. In this short introduction, I availed myself of the noteworthy work of Amela Einat, The Key to a Locked Door (Hebrew) (Hakibbutz Hameuchad, 2000), pp. 16–22. Einat is an expert in the identification and treatment of learning disabilities.

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