HIRAETH

A Written Creative Work submitted to the faculty of San Francisco State University In partial fulfillment of the requirements for Al the Degree % c2o!l Master of Fine Arts

* ^ 3 3 4 " In

Creative Writing

by

Alandra Jean Hileman

San Francisco, California

May 2017 Copyright by Alandra Jean Hileman 2017 CERTIFICATION OF APPROVAL

I certify that I have read Hiraeth by Alandra Jean Hileman, and that in my opinion this work meets the criteria for approving a thesis submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirement for the degree Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing at San Francisco State

University.

Professor of Creative Writing & Drama

Michelle Carter, Professor of Creative Writing HIRAETH

Alandra Jean Hileman San Francisco, California 2017

HIRAETH, A Play in 4 Cantos

Over drinks in a pub, two strangers have a shocking revelation: they seem to know each

other well and share memories of their past lives in the ancient mythic cycle of King

Arthur. One believes that the myths are true and the memories are real, but flawed

memories are not convincing evidence for the other. They enter into a heated debate

about myth, identity, loyalty, survival, and the nature of memory. And just when it seems they’ve reached an impasse, an ancient enemy enters the fray to offer everyone

answers...for a price. (5 actors; 80 min. Diverse & gender-flexible casting.)

I certify that the Annotation is a correct representation of the content of this written TABLE OF CONTENTS

Canto 1...... 1

Canto II...... 38

Canto III...... 48

Canto IV...... 61 1

Canto 1 Setting: The Prydwen Pub, evening. Lights up on a comfortable, bustling pub, stuffed to the gills with people laughing, watching sports, drinking, living. Despite the crowd, the BARKEEP is not terribly busy, and cheerfully chats and jokes with the patrons. It is a warm and happy place, full o f light except for one corner table where the overhanging light has been switched off. At that table, the PUB OWNER sits alone, quietly observing the rest o fthe room. Into the chaos enters the CEO, obviously a big city fish-out-of-water in this tiny rural town, a sudden note o fdiscomfort on the regular routine. After winding through the crowd, the CEO ends up at the bar and hovers hesitantly until the BARKEEP appears. BARKEEP Hi there! What can I get for you? CEO Um...what’s on tap? BARKEEP Just about anything you can think of, dark, light, hoppy - all brewed right here! CEO I’ll take the house favorite? BARKEEP One Bedrydant Braggot coming right up! The BARKEEP vanishes briefly behind other patrons crowding the bar, reappearing with a pint glass as they return to their table. BARKEEP Here you go! So, what brings you down to these parts? 2

CEO Me? BARKEEP Yeah. No offense, but between the slick blazer and the deer-in-the-headlights eyes, you don’t strike me as a local. CEO Yeah, I guess not. BARKEEP Plus, small town, everybody knows everybody. CEO Of course. BARKEEP But don’t worry about it We’re a real friendly bunch, long as you don’t insult the local sports or try to sell anybody a bridge. CEO (starting to relax) Well damn, there go my two favorite hobbies. (taking another drink) This is the best ale I have ever had in my life. BARKEEP You like it? It’s our most popular in-house brew; not many folks do a braggot anymore, even the craft breweries, so it’s become a rare sort of specialty. CEO Elixir of the gods, eh? BARKEEP Don’t know about the gods, though I think it was blessed by a sorcerer once. CEO What? 3

BARKEEP Where are you from anyway, if you don’t mind my asking? CEO I’m from The City. BARKEEP Whoo, that’s a bit of a trip. In town for business? CEO Personal. I came to...meet someone. BARKEEP Gotcha. All going well? CEO Not sure. Haven’t actually met them yet. BARKEEP Ah, one of those. Well if they stand you up- CEO So, does the owner come around much? BARKEEP Oh yeah, the boss lives upstairs and is alwasy lurking around. I can introduce you, unless you wanted to complain about the service, in which case I have no idea who, where, or when- CEO Oh, no, no, I don’t want to...the service is great! I didn’t mean to- BARKEEP Relax! I’m just messing with you. CEO Oh, right. (CONT’D) 4

CEO (takes another drink) You always this packed? I almost missed the turn-off for the road, so I was surprised to see such a crowd. BARKEEP Used to be I’d be the only one here from 4pm to 3am most nights, but recently we’ve been jammed wall to wall. CEO That’s a pretty drastic change. BARKEEP Don’t I know it. Lost three pounds the first week it happened from all the extra running up and down the stockroom stairs. CEO Damn. I know some ad execs up in The City who would kill to know your secret. Radio spot? Huge-ass billboard on the freeway? BARKEEP I wish. Some big-city foodie wrote this whole article on the best small-batch brews in the country and named that braggot you’re drinking Number One - did a big feature on the pub and the boss and eveiything, and apparently it went...viral? I think that’s what they call it? CEO Yeah. BARKEEP Right; we’re pretty off-grid out here. Anyway, apparently this story just blew up all over the internet somehow, and we’ve been swamped ever since. CEO You make that sound like it’s a bad thing? 5

BARKEEP It’s just...all that stuff from the past they like to dig up about the Boss - two tours in the Middle East, getting blown up, the homeless stint - the boss doesn’t wanna be some rags-to-riches feel-good story, or a figurehead for veteran’s rights, just wants to be left alone. And this joumalist-foodie-whoever didn’t get any sort of permission to write the article. We didn’t even know about it until all these brewmasters from all over the country started showing up, and reporters from the local networks calling...even had two or three major breweries ask if Boss would sell them the braggot recipe, which ain’t ever gonna happen. We’ve been rolling with the punches, but it’s been a pretty big shift in how we deal with things. Makes you really step back and evaluate your perspective, y’know? CEO I get that I think maybe that’s why I’m here, sort of. Reevaluating some things that I thought I understood in my life. BARKEEP I’m sony, I shouldn’t be talking your ear off- CEO No, please, it’s fine. I wholeheartedly welcome the distraction. BARKEEP Good, ’cause you’re easy to talk to. CEO Thanks? BARKEEP Sorry, that sounded kinda weird. I just mean, bartenders are supposed to be good at making small talk, but not getting too personal. But sometimes you meet someone who you feel like you’ve known for a long time, like you can get personal right away. Whooo, now I’m getting really weird, I’m so sorry. Want another drink? On the house, for having to put up with my rambling. 6

CEO No, no, thank you. I’d love to, but I think I’m already feeling this one more than I should, so I should probably go. BARKEEP What about your meeting with the boss? CEO What-? BARKEEP Waiting for you right over there. The BARKEEP indicates the figure at the dark table. CEO Wait, how long- BARKEEP Usually comes down to keep an eye on things during busy nights. Busses tables for me if I get too hung up at the taps, but I seem to be okay for now. CEO What makes you think I’m here to meet-? BARKEEP The heroes are always faced with many trials to prove their worth before they will reach the end of their quest. If they are blessed, one of those trials may lead them to a wise one, who may help guide them down the path they truly seek. You have passed the test, and in so doing proved your worth. CEO Excuse me? BARKEEP I said, you should go say hello. A sudden wave ofipatrons at the far end ofthe bar attracts the BARKEEP’S attention. Hesitantly, the CEO crosses over to the dark table, only to be 7

startled when the light above it suddenly turns on, revealing the PUB OWNER. PUB OWNER Hey there, stranger. You wanted to see me? CEO How did you- PUB OWNER Learned how to read lips in the VA hospital while I was waiting for benefits to kick in and get me my fucking hearing aid Wanna see an even better party trick? Shake my hand. The CEO takes the offered hand and recoils when the PUB OWNER pulls his arm away, leaving a prosthetic hand in place. PUB OWNER (grinning) I’m great at birthday parties. CEO You’re the owner? PUB OWNER Nah, I’m the village idiot, but they let me pretend to run the place so I don’t run around town naked screaming about the end-of-days. It takes the CEO a moment to realize this is a joke. The PUB OWNER indicates the chair on the other side o f the table. The CEO sits, gently setting the hand on the table. PUB OWNER Sorry, I’m a little quick to haze the big-city types these days, what with all the vultures descending on my little slice of obscurity. CEO Yeah, I can see how that might get old fast. 8

PUB OWNER So that said, what brings you to our fair establishment? CEO (shrugging) I got tired of my local bar, thought I’d try something new. PUB OWNER Two hundred miles away? CEO I like craft beer. PUB OWNER Yeah, the suit was a dead giveaway. CEO I...okay, fine. I read that article, the one that you and your bartender both seem to be less than excited about, and I wanted to...meet you. PUB OWNER (wry smile) That a fact? CEO Yeah. PUB OWNER You a reporter too? CEO God, no, not at all. PUB OWNER Lawyer? Activist? Social Services? CEO What? No, I’m in risk-management solutions for a Fortune 100 company. 9

PUB OWNER Oh god. Guess I shouldn’t be surprised; you always were an overachiever. But really? At least Perce had the decency to be low-profile. CEO Huh? PUB OWNER (after a long pause) Nevermind. So, now you’ve met me. Go ahead. Ask. CEO Ask? PUB OWNER C’mon, practically every word out of your mouth since you came in the door has been a question, but I’m pretty sure none of them have been the one you really want to ask. So. I’m here all night; ask away. A casual challenge. The CEO sits uncomfortable in the Pub Owner’s stare, fumblingfor something to say. CEO So, the Piydwen Pub...strange name. Why’d you pick it? The PUB OWNER cracks a huge, knowing grin, but decides to play along. PUB OWNER Okay, okay. It’s Welsh for "fair-faced," or "handsome." Named it after my second-best trait. CEO What, Lledneisrwydd Arms was already taken? PUB OWNER Ooh, not bad for a saesneg shinachl 10

CEO What’d you call me, you fils de pute- PUB OWNER So, how long have you been speaking Welsh? The CEO stops, puzzled. The PUB OWNER lets the question settle for a moment before continuing. PUB OWNER That’s what I thought. The Prydwen was the name of a ship in a legend. A famous king from days of yore took a legion of men away on a quest - in some versions it’s to a castle of the fae, sometimes to the otherworld, sometimes to Ireland, which was as good as the otherworld in those days. Most versions say only the king and seven or so of the men came back, but they won the day. Classic triumph of the underdog story; I always liked that. CEO You called me a sneaky English-speaking bastard. PUB OWNER Yep. CEO How do I know that? PUB OWNER Well I assume you get called that a lot- CEO No, no one just guesses something like that I don’t even speak another language, except for a smattering of... wait... I took French in school- PUB OWNER ...good for you? 11

CEO (ignoring the interruption) -and I got great scores on the written tests. But, when we spoke it in class, I was completely wrong. Well, not completely - like, I was still speaking French, but it wasn’t the same French as everyone else? Anyway, eventually my teacher introduced me to this friend of hers who was some super-renowned French medievalist, or something, and she said I was speaking langues t/’oiL.basically an archaic "dead French," but with native fluency. Is that what this is? PUB OWNER What is? CEO One kid joked that I must have gotten dropped on my head as a baby, and it gave me some weird savant ability. But don’t instantaneously learn an entire dead language from head trauma, right? It still comes to me, sometimes. Like, if I’m reading out loud Fll slip into it..it’s like someone else is saying it, but still me. After I read the article about this place, I couldn’t shake this feeling like I knew you, but it was like the French thing: like it was someone else who knew you, but that was still me. I searched your name, thought maybe we crossed paths in the past. But I just got all the same stuff from the first article, and none of that lines up with my life. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t focus at work, and finally I thought maybe meeting you in person would help me figure out what the hell was going on. PUB OWNER And has it? CEO No. I’m even more confused. God, I feel like we’ve even had this conversation before. PUB OWNER It’s possible. 12

CEO What does that mean? PUB OWNER What’s your real question? The one you came here to ask? CEO How’d you lose your hand? PUB OWNER IED blew up my Jeep. What’s your real /question? CEO What the hell did your bartender mean with all that weird stuff about proving my worth? PUB OWNER You passed the test and get to move forward in your quest. What’s your /real question? CEO Would you stop fucking asking me /that? PUB OWNER No! What is the question you came here to /ask me? CEO (jumping up abruptly) I am not playing games Bedivere; this is a matter of life or death, now will you- The CEO stops short and freezes as everything suddenly clicks into place. The bustle o fthe pub continues uninterrupted around them. PUB OWNER (entirely calm and unfazed) Sit down. CEO Oh my god. 13

PUB OWNER I knew you’d show up eventually. CEO C ’est quoi ce /bordell PUB OWNER Lancelot. Sit down. The CEO sits, stunned and overwhelmed. PUB OWNER You’re a lot prettier this time around. Though to be fair, given what you had to work with in the first place, that’s not saying much. CEO Have I lost my mind? PUB OWNER More likefound it, in a sense. (calling the BARKEEP) Perce! Two over here! CEO Perce. As in- PUB OWNER Percival. You do remember Percival, yes? CEO I remember...oh my god. The CEO crumples, head in hands. The BARKEEP swings by the table and drops off two pint glasses. BARKEEP Everything okay, Boss? PUB OWNER Yeah, we’ll be fine in a bit. 14

BARKEEP

(whispering) ...one of us? PUB OWNER It’s Lance. The BARKEEP’s eyes grow huge; the PUB OWNER indicates for quiet and the BARKEEP slinks away, but continues to glance over often. After a long pause, the PUB OWNER takes a sip o f drink and speaks softly. PUB OWNER There’s this word the Welsh have, hiraeth. It doesn’t exist in English, but the concept roughly translates to something like...a deeply profound longing or nostalgia to return to a home that no longer exists. That’s what it all starts with, I think. For whatever unknown reason, we’re suddenly hit with this strange, overwhelming sensation of hiraeth, and it unsettles us until we can’t think about anything else. And then the details start to slowly creep up on us: the places we used to live, the food we used to love, the faces we used to know, until something- (snaps fingers) -and just like that we start to remember, really, truly remember who we used to be. And it doesn’t make any sense with who we are now, but it somehow feels more...right. Doesn’t it, Lance? All of a sudden, don’t you think that hopping on a horse and riding off into the forest to look for a dragon actually makes a hell of a lot more sense than sitting in an office and typing fiscal reports? That’s why I came out here, to the middle of backwoods nowhere, to brew like we did in the olden days, and sit and look at trees. Because some days I can’t keep straight who I am. And some nights I wake up screaming, because I know exactly. CEO This isn’t possible. 15

PUB OWNER And yet here we are. CEO So you’ve known, all this time? Who you "really" were? PUB OWNER Not exactly. Thought it was just PTSD at first I spent two years staying as drunk as possible to try to keep the memories out but after a while I decided they were easier to live with than chase away. I started doing a lot of research, and eventually I pieced together an explanation that may or may not be the truth, but that I can at least live with. Honestly, I really figured I was just crazy and it never even crossed my mind that anyone else might be out there until I ran into...I mean, Perce didn’t even show up until a little over a year ago. CEO And you didn’t go for Occam’s Razor? PUB OWNER Which would be what exactly? CEO That you’re both crazy. PUB OWNER Sure, maybe? Look, from what I can figure out this has been going on since the first time we all- CEO Wait what’s been going on? PUB OWNER This. Us, here, ourselves but not really ourselves. Reincarnated, or returned, transmigrated souls, I don’t know the exact mechanics of it. CEO Jesus Christ. 16

PUB OWNER Possibly, he did preach the everlasting nature of the soul. CEO Goddamn it, Bedivere! Do you ever stop joking? PUB OWNER Nope! Some things never change, you know. CEO I thought you were supposed to be the smart one. PUB OWNER Wise. Sir Bedivere the Wise, Nothing to do with inherent intelligence; everything to do with the application of knowledge. CEO I thought it had to do with you being older than dirt. PUB OWNER That’s more like it! Always tiy to keep your sense of humor, Lance. I mean, as much as you ever had one in the first place- CEO So who else is there? PUB OWNER Hm? CEO So...let’s say you’re not crazy, just for argument’s sake. I mean, if you’re right about this, then the rest of the knights must be out there too, right? Gawain, Kay, your brother, my son, Arth- PUB OWNER No, it’s just us. CEO How can you be sure? 17

PUB OWNER Because we’re the only ones who- CEO Look, if Percival and I both found you, who’s to say the others aren’t all out there too, looking- PUB OWNER Because they’re dead. CEO What? Yeah, we’re all dead, technically. I thought you just said this was some sort of reincarnation or something- PUB OWNER The only ones who seem to come back are the ones who survived. CEO ...Survived? PUB OWNER At Camlann. Survived after he fell. Before you ask, I don’t know why, okay? Divine justice, karmic retribution, penance for our sins, reward for our piety, I Don’t Know. I have a pretty good theory about it, but that’s all it is. CEO I want to hear it. PUB OWNER Are you sure you don’t want to take a minute to- CEO This morning I was a financial analyst from suburbia, and now I’m sitting in a backwater bar discovering that apparently I have the memories of a thousand-year- old Frenchman from the greatest English mythic cycle in history, which still doesn’t (CONT’D) 18

CEO make any comprehensible sense, but it’s happening. So, now I want to know what the fuck is going on, and if theories are all you’ve got, lay them on me.

PUB OWNER Okay...The stories about us are collectively referred to as the "Matter of Britain," right? (the CEO shrugs and nods) Now, obviously, since our time - that time - whatever, there have been whole lot of different versions and ideas of our stories written down. The quests are always a little different, the number of Orkney sons changes, sometimes you and I are the same person - which is really weird by the way - but there are certain major events that are consistent in just about all the versions, and one of them is the Rex Quondam Rexque Futurus prophesy. Also, when did they stop teaching Latin in schools? Everybody misquotes it as quondam ETfuturus which I guess is technically correct, but- CEO Bedivere. PUB OWNER -Right, anyway. So the phrase comes from the full inscription that was supposedly inscribed all over the marker of Arthur’s tomb, Hie iacet Arthurus, rex quondam rexque futurus- CEO "Here lies Arthur, king once, and king to be." PUB OWNER Exactly. CEO But Arthur didn’t have a tomb. We didn’t bury him; they sailed him away to Avalon... 19

PUB OWNER Right! That’s what we all remember! And some of the texts have that too. So, the idea goes that the fae priestesses of Avalon carried him there and put him into an enchanted sleep so that he could recover from his wounds, and he will stay in that slumber until Britain’s hour of greatest need, at which time he will rise again to defend his beloved land. The Once and Future King. CEO I still don’t see what that has to do with us. PUB OWNER A king needs an army, right? We were the strong ones, the ones who survived, so who better to rise with him? A long pause. CEO So, you’re saying the reason why we’re all suddenly remembering things that happened over a thousand years ago, is because King Arthur is coming back to defend Britain from some unnamed evil, and we’re supposed to help him? PUB OWNER Well, it’s one theory. My second best theory is your Occam’s Razor, that we’re suffering from the world’s most bizarre case of shared delusion ever recorded, but personally I think the first idea is way cooler. CEO ...You are insane. PUB OWNER I have not discounted that possibility. CEO This is not possible. 20

PUB OWNER Which part, exactly? CEO All of it! That stuff is all myth! It’s bedtime stories for kids. PUB OWNER So maybe it’s all a neurological tic. Maybe you studied the stories so much, and so long, that you can’t separate the fiction from the reality. But we both know that’s not true, right? Memory is a fluid thing, you know. We inform it, stretch it, change it with everything we do. But here’s the thing: the more often you remember something, the less true it’s likely to be. Every time you replay your eighth birthday party in your head, the more likely you are to remember it wrong. Because every time you think back to that day, a little more of your present self seeps into it. And then the things all those present selves project onto the memory - all the ideas, emotions, wishes, imaginations of your current self - get added to the memory every time. So eventually, you end up with a clear, tangible image of Great Aunt Myrtle, who died six years before you were bom, riding into your party on a dinosaur. That’s why science says the memories that just pop into your head are more pure; the things you’d forgotten until just now, the suppressed traumas, they’re frozen in your neural pathways just the way they happened. They haven’t had time to be corrupted by getting replayed over and over. CEO Where are you getting all this shit from? PUB OWNER I spent a lot of time in libraries when I was homeless. They’re open to the public, entertaining, and out of the rain. 21

CEO So, your rationale for believing that you, and I, and your bartender, are all actually knights from the third century is that you didn’t remember that fact for a long time. PUB OWNER And one day it just clicked into my head and everything in my life made sense. Yep. Pretty much. CEO God damn it. PUB OWNER What? CEO ...that actually does almost make sense. PUB OWNER See? CEO So, why do I suddenly remember all of this right now? Why not last year? Or...twenty years from now? PUB OWNER I don’t know. CEO Well, what made it..what did you call it..click? What made it click for- (he realizes) -your hand. PUB OWNER Hm? 22

CEO The article said you lost your hand in the service. You said you got blown up; that’s why they discharged you. That’s what triggered it, right? Losing your hand in battle like you did...back then? PUB OWNER Oh, that would be nicely symmetrical. Like a return to my proper form? Lose my hand, find myself, or some bullshit. But no, that’s not what clicked for me. A reflective pause. A chill has seeped into the pub by this point, and most, ifnot all, o f the patrons have departed by now, save the JOURNALIST who sits in shadows at the back o f the room. Only the BARKEEP is uneasily aware o f the shift in the room’s tone, and tries to stay busy cleaning empty tables and washing glasses at the bar, which briefly catches the CEO’s attention. CEO Well, how about Percival? What happened to make him "click"? PUB OWNER I don’t know. He didn’t tell me, and I’m not going to ask. He’ll tell me when he’s ready. CEO But why wouldn’t you ask? If there are more of us out there, then we should see if there’s some sort of pattern to- PUB OWNER What do you remember about Percival’s last quest? After he returned from the Castle of the Fisher King. CEO Um...hold on. He...he joined Galahad and Bors to seek out the Grail, right? Yeah, that was it, and after Galahad had proved worthy to obtain the blessed ascension of the Sangreal, Perce came back to court with Bors... 23

PUB OWNER And do you remember how he died? CEO Well, then he... (after a moment) No...I can’t remember anything about Percival after that.

PUB OWNER Neither can he. Or if he does; he’s never said anything to me about it. But whatever happened, if he’s here, we can assume two things: One, that he survived after Arthur was taken to Avalon, and Two, that he didn’t return to help Arthur at Camlann, or you and I would have seen him on the battlefield. And you know he wouldn’t have abandoned the call-to-arms of his king lightly. CEO (glancing toward the Barkeep) Oh shit. PUB OWNER Yeah. Look, poor kid had enough of a guilt complex the first time around when he failed the quest of the Fisher King; spent the whole rest of that life trying to atone and prove himself worthy of re-finding the Grail Castle. And then when he did, it was only Galahad -your son - who was deemed worthy. The last thing Perce needs in this life is to feel like he’s still being judged for his failures instead of his accomplishments. CEO Isn’t that all we get remembered for anyway? Our failures? PUB OWNER Well, you also get remembered for being an ugly-ass French motherfiicker- CEO And you’re a one-handed alcoholic who pulled a Simon Peter in the final hour. 24

PUB OWNER "Verily, I say unto thee, That this night, before the cock crow, thou shalt deny me thrice..." CEO What were you going to do, by the way? Keep Excalibur for yourself? A right of succession, a souvenir? You know no one but the rightful king could ever wield the Kings word, and only Arthur was ever the rightful king. Three times, he asked you to return it to the lake before you finally did it. PUB OWNER (quietly) "Peter said unto him, Though I should die with thee, yet will I not deny thee." I thought he would need it I didn’t think he was really going to die. A pause.

CEO Well, better Peter the Denier than Judas the Betrayer. PUB OWNER Hey, don’t do that. You came back to help him- CEO No, I came back to protect her. If I hadn’t come back to rescue her then none of Lot’s sons would have died, and the Bastard wouldn’t have gone to war to avenge them. That was all my fault PUB OWNER Over a thousand years, and you’re still blaming yourself for Mordred’s choices? He set his brothers up to get killed so he’d have an excuse to go to war; that wasn’t your doing. 25

CEO If I hadn’t betrayed Arthur in the first place, he wouldn’t have had any way to set them up. You can’t barge in on an affair that isn’t happening. PUB OWNER He would have found some reason to start a war anyway, and you know it. CEO Do we all have survivor’s guilt, or did we survive because we all feel guilty? PUB OWNER What? CEO That’s a common thread too. Part of the pattern. It’s not just that we all survived after Arthur fell, it’s that we all feel like we failed him too. PUB OWNER You don’t think Kay failed? Kay failed all the fucking time, trust me. Gawain, Bors, hell, even Merlin let himself get conned out of his powers by a cute girl with a tree fetish. CEO But they all went first. PUB OWNER Correlation versus causation. What’s your point? CEO Look, I’m just trying to make sense of this, okay? It’s a lot to process here, and I still don’t know if I believe any of it! PUB OWNER Well, for this all being some crazy delusion, your knowledge of European folklore has sure improved in last twenty minutes. Or were you holding out on me? CEO You know what, luck you. 26

PUB OWNER Is that an offer or a threat? CEO Have you ever taken a goddamn thing seriously in your life? PUB OWNER Not if I could help it. CEO Okay, so what did you do, Sir Buddy-Boy, after Camelot crumbled, and Arthur left, and everyone else was dead? I became a hermit. I remember that now. Maybe that’s why I’ve always been such a loner in this life too. Because back then, I locked myself up in a monastery with vows of chastity, poverty, and silence, and I spent the rest my life - that life - praying for forgiveness for abandoning the only mortal man who was ever worthy of unflinching loyalty. I couldn’t look anyone in the eye, so I found a place where I never had to. I was consumed by guilt and shame, and I knew that for once in my life, I had to face that by myself, without a band of brothers behind me. That was my last great quest, alone with the weight of all I had and had not done. And I’ll bet you did the same, didn’t you? I never knew for sure what happened to you, but I’ll bet if I asked, after you spun me some bullshit story about a harem of exotic beauties, you’d tell me you went back to Wales, and holed up in some nice little cottage where you could look at your goddamn trees and never had to see or speak to anyone ever again. Am I right? (the PUB OWNER nods) And I’ll bet if Perce finally comes around to being able to talk about it, we’ll just get another version of the same story. So why us? If we’re supposed to be the returning king’s army, why would God or Fate or the cosmos pick the ones who not only failed him, but couldn’t even come around to dying for him? Maybe we’re not the "chosen ones," maybe we’re the fiick-ups who still haven’t proven themselves worthy enough to move on. 27

PUB OWNER Or the ones who loved him best? You don’t feel guilt without love. CEO (abruptly) Jenny. PUB OWNER What? CEO The guilty. The survivors. You, Perce, me...Jenny has to be around somewhere too. PUB OWNER Lance... CEO She fits the pattern. PUB OWNER I’m sorry, what pattern? I thought this was all my crazy delusion. We’ve got three fucked-up weirdos in a bar, that’s not a pattern, it’s the beginning of a bad j oke! CEO (ignoring him) No, it fits. I saw her, once, after Arthur...I asked her to go with me, to France, and she said no. She joined the abbey at Glastonbury. Her end fits the pattern; she has to be around somewhere. There has to be some way to find her. Or to make her find us. Maybe if we did something; ran an article in a national paper, or set up a website- JOURNALIST Or you could just ask for her address. The CEO jumps up, startled, while the PUB OWNER and BARKEEP both freeze. The figure from the dark comer ofthe room, the JOURNALIST, gets up and steps into the light, ale in hand, oozing sex andpower. The icy tension is palpable. 28

JOURNALIST I see why you like to sit in the dark, Bedwyr. Much easier on the eyes than these modem fluorescent lights. PUB OWNER I thought it just reminded you of the cave you slithered out of. JOURNALIST Such a charmer. I’ll bet you say that to all the girls. BARKEEP You aren’t welcome here. JOURNALIST Oh, Parsifal, even after all this time? Isn’t it time we kiss and make up? BARKEEP I swear to God I will- JOURNALIST Swear to Him all you want, sweetie, He hasn’t bothered with me for years. So, Lance, you’re looking good this century. So glad you liked my article. CEO Article? JOURNALIST My little interest piece about the noble war veteran, so tragically neglected by his country in spite of his service, who nonetheless pulled himself up by his bootstraps and opened the best unknown pub in the countiy. I’m somewhat of an aficionado when it comes to old-world brews. Nothing quite beats a braggot brewed by the light of the full moon with a recipe blessed by the Druids of old, hm? Tastes like home. CEO You wrote the article about this place? 29

JOURNALIST "Wrote" is a bit of a misnomer. Conjured, maybe, is a bit more appropriate. The BARKEEP comes out from behind the bar. BARKEEP I am giving you one minute to get out that door, or I am taking you by force. JOURNALIST (sharp, like a slap) Don’t make promises you don’t intend to keep, Parsifal. It’s never served you well. PUB OWNER That’s enough. CEO Who the fuck are you? JOURNALIST You don’t remember me? I’m hurt, Lancelot du Lac; wounded even. PUB OWNER Morgana. State your business or get out. JOURNALIST I do love a man who takes charge. CEO Morgana? Le Fay!? PUB OWNER Guess that shoots your pattern all to hell, hm? CEO But how- JOURNALIST And to think, Daddy always said dabbling in sorcery would damn me to eternal torment. I suppose he wasn’t wrong... 30

BARKEEP I thought I told you to leave. CEO So what are you doing here? BARKEEP Pissing me off? PUB OWNER Looking to score? JOURNALIST I just though I would stop in say hello. It’s been a long time, hasn’t it? It only seemed polite, what with the new member of the club and all. BARKEEP Bullshit. You never show up just to say "hello." You always want something. JOURNALIST You’re right, I do want something. (slithering up to the CEO) But I’ll trade you for it. Fair is fair, after all, and the fay may be cunning but we do abide by a kind of code, even if it’s not the same as yours. BARKEEP We’re not buying what you’re selling. JOURNALIST Ah-ah-ah. Trading. Always a trade. Quid pro quo. PUB OWNER See, Latin! Never should have gone out of style... JOURNALIST So what do you say, Lance? 31

BARKEEP Don’t say anything until you make her lay out the exact terms of the bargain. The otherworld will cheat you out of your soul with a turn of phrase. JOURNALIST Only if you’re brave enough to say a word. The BARKEEP suddenly takes a swing at the JOURNALIST, who barely dodges, tripping the barkeep in the process. PUB OWNER (standing up) Perce! The BARKEEP recovers and slams into the laughing JOURNALIST, taking them both to the ground. They tussle, and the BARKEEP ends up pinning the JOURNALIST to the ground, hands wrapped around the Journalist’s throat and shouting. The PUB OWNER physically lifts and restrains the BARKEEP, while the CEO kneels to help the JOURNALIST sit up. BARKEEP (shouting, increasingly hysterical) The rules of chivalry are fucked, you know that? What did they ever get us? Stay pure, stay loyal, don’t ask questions, don’t rock the boat, watch all your friends fail and fail and fail and get told they aren’t worthy and aren’t good and aren’t pure when that’s all they’ve ever tried to be and they were set up for fucking failure from the fucking start, and even when you follow all the rules you’re still fucked because you kept quiet when for once in your life you were supposed the ask the question - Why? Why didn’t I ask the fucking question? All I had to do was ask one fucking question. PUB OWNER Percival! 32

The BARKEEP collapses against the PUB OWNER’s bear-grip, sobbing and exhausted. There a moment o f silence. PUB OWNER Okay, okay. C’mon, Perce. We’re gonna go take a walk. Outside, let’s go. BARKEEP Bed- PUB OWNER Shut up. No. Not in front of them. Let’s go. The PUB OWNER shoots the CEO a pointed "be careful" look, then hauls the BARKEEP outside. JOURNALIST Well who would have thought? Looks like little Percy found a bit of backbone this lifetime around. CEO You shouldn’t be so hard on him. JOURNALIST Why not? I’m no harder than he is on himself. The CEO starts to respond, but has no reply. The JOURNALIST slowly gets up from the floor. JOURNALIST Got a grip, the kid does. A long pause. CEO What did you mean before? JOURNALIST Hmm? CEO About...about asking for her address? 33

JOURNALIST Ah, there it is. CEO Is she really out there? JOURNALIST Didn’t Bedwyr tell you anything? CEO Is she? JOURNALIST Of course. Why wouldn’t she be? CEO I don’t know..! still don’t even know what’s really going on here. JOURNALIST You don’t think this is real. CEO ...I haven’t decided yet. JOURNALIST But wouldn’t it be worth it? CEO What? JOURNALIST If you could find Gwenhyfar again. CEO And you can tell me where she is? JOURNALIST A trade, Lancelot. What you want for what I want. CEO So...what do you want then? 34

JOURNALIST (with a smile) I want Arthur. They are interrupted by the return ofthe PUB OWNER. CEO (too quickly) How’s Perce? PUB OWNER He’ll be fine. Told him to sit outside and focus on breathing ’til he feels okay to come back in. CEO Good, good. Maybe I should go check on- PUB OWNER (blocking the door) What’d you say to him, Morgan? JOURNALIST Me? CEO She didn’t- PUB OWNER Didn’t she? A brief stalemate. CEO She’ll help me find Jenny. PUB OWNER Oh really? What exactly did she say? CEO I don’t... 35

PUB OWNER Dealing with the fae, it’s all about specifics. JOURNALIST Oh for god’s sake, Bedwyr...I said that I want Arthur. To be specific, I want Lancelot to help me find him. PUB OWNER Why? JOURNALIST Now, I can’t be expected to do all the dirty work around here- PUB OWNER No, I mean why do you need to find him? JOURNALIST That’s my own business. The BARKEEP creeps in and stands silently at the door. CEO So how do we know you’re not out to destroy him? JOURNALIST You don’t. But only a fool would cross Arthur, especially if he really has been called back after a thousand years. You simply have to trust that I mean him no harm, and leave it at that. BARKEEP Yeah, because your word has always been particularly trustworthy. The JOURNALIST starts to retort, but thinks better o f it andjust turns back to the CEO. JOURNALIST Well Lance, what do you think? Really, both sides of this are to your best interest, if you think about it 36

CEO ...So if I agree to help you find Arthur, you’ll tell me where to find Jenny? JOURNALIST More or less. BARKEEP You can’t seriously be thinking about striking an actual bargain with her. CEO What, exactly, does that mean? "More or less"? JOURNALIST Well, / technically don’t know where she is- CEO Then why in hell would I- JOURNALIST -But Bedwyr does. And I can give him what he wants. CEO What? (turning back to the PUB OWNER) Is that true? PUB OWNER (quietly, no eye contact) Don’t do this, Lance. It’s not going to go the way you want it to. CEO Is it true? All this time we’ve been talking, you’ve known where she is? And you didn’t say a word. PUB OWNER Yep. Guinevere was the first one who found me. Before Perce, before the pub. We’ve...kept in touch. 37

CEO Why didn’t you tell me? PUB OWNER You didn’t need to know. JOURNALIST So, Bedwyr will tell you where to find Gwenhyfar, I’ll give him what he wants from me, and you’ll help me find Arthur. Everybody wins. Except Percy, but I imagine he’s used to that by now. PUB OWNER Hey, lay off the kid, Morgan. JOURNALIST Jealous of the attention? BARKEEP Go to hell. JOURNALIST Already there, sweetheart. CEO What do you want from her? PUB OWNER Nothing you’d understand. CEO Because I’m just the ugly French idiot? PUB OWNER Because...it doesn’t matter. Look, she offered you the deal, so you have to decide to take it or not. That’s how these things work, which is why I generally avoid dealing with the fae, but in this case I’m sort of locked in here. It’s your call. BARKEEP Lance, don’t Trust me on this one, you don’t want to get tangled up with her. 38

CEO If I turn her down, will you still tell me where to find Jenny? A long pause. The PUB OWNER does not speak. The CEO turns to the JOURNALIST. CEO Deal. The JOURNALIST grins as all the lights in the barflicker slightly. The PUB OWNER pulls a pen out o fa pocket, scribbles something on a bar napkin, and hands it to the CEO. The CEO studies it, looks around at the others, and swiftly pushes past the BARKEEP out the door. Lights fade to black.

Canto 2 The bar is now gone, whether because the set has been removed or because through trickery o f lights, scrims, etc. it is no longer prominent. All that is left visible is the PUB OWNER’s table, pooled in the light that was turned o ff at the beginning o fthe play. The rest o f the stage will eventually become the ambiguous space o f Canto 3, butfor now remains empty. The PUB OWNER, alone in this void, has climbed on top o f the table and is attempting to get the light to turn off. PUB OWNER Did I ever tell you about how it happened? No, of course not. So back when I was still stationed in Fallujah, Ramirez and I got this kid assigned to our unit, must have been barely twenty, motherfucking half-Chinese kid from the Bronx named Clint Chan, of all things. Seriously, what parent sticks their kid with a name like that? Though I guess Sagramore and Agravaine would be as weird today as Clint and Marisol would have been to us. Anyway, like most twenty-year olds, he thought he was hot stuff, and me having already attained the wise-old age of twenty-six, I (CONT’D) 39

PUB OWNER thought he was full of shit. But you’re out in the suck, and no matter how much of a motherfucking tool you think a kid is, he’s all you’ve got, so you all kinda grow on each other, and by the time you’re done you’re all family. You know what 1 mean. (The PUB OWNER gives up on the light and slumps off the table, back into a chair) Our unit had been together for about...oh, eighteen months, with literally nothing interesting to do besides count sand, and one day we’re doing some sort of routine bullshit patrol, and out of nowhere, pop, pop poppopPOPPOPPOP, we’re getting fired on from all sides and we can’t tell who, or why, and then- (slaps the table) -Clint goes down. And f start to get this weird tunnel vision as 1 stare at him, like "we’ve done this before, what am I supposed to do next, we’ve done this before." And it’s Ramirez smacks me back to reality - "Grab his arm, we gotta go!" - and she grabs one arm and I grab the other and we somehow manage to get to a rubbish heap and take cover. We don’t have the med kit with us, so Ramirez peels open Clint’s Kevlar and he’s got this nasty hole in his side, and she just pulls a tampon out of her pack and pops that sucker in there, seals the hole, stops the bleeding, and we start returning fire to try and cover him until somebody can get to us. And every so often, I glance down at at my feet to see if the kid is still alive...his blond hair is streaked pink with blood, but I don’t know if it’s his or mine or someone else’s, and he’s choking under the weight of a heavy breastplate that was forged for my muscle, not his wiry frame, and his green eyes are forgiving me, forgiving me, for not being able to save him and I just keep fighting because god damn it I am not going to let those bastards kill my brother and get away with it, even though I see his face clouding over with that pallor of the grave...and then I realize that Clint is very much (CONT’D) 40

PUB OWNER alive still and cracking jokes about how "he’s had worse" to the medics and Marisol - Ramirez, that is, is telling me I can stop shooting. (snaps fingers) Click. Clint was fine; I was more of a mess than he was. Not that I could really explain why to anyone. I got blown up six months later, but that just sort of settled the last of the loose bits into place. That’s when I figured it was some serious PTSD. I wasn’t wrong, either; we just didn’t have a name for it back in the olden days. You know what else we didn’t have back then? Antibiotics. My fucking doctor keeps calling because I stopped going to appointments...three years ago, maybe four...and they act like my stump’s gonna suddenly start rotting off my body or something. I mean, really? The first time I lost a hand 1 cauterized it with blacksmith’s tool and sewed an empty wineskin full of honey over it. I’m pretty sure that whatever they did to it in the VA hospital was a hell of a lot more sanitary than that, and that lasted me, what, a-hundred-fifty years? You ever realize that? These days a person’s lucky to see seventy-five, with all the medicine in the world, when back in the days of before we even knew what a germ was, we all lived to be, like, two hundred years old, and we were on our feet with swords in hand to the last of it I mean...well, you know what I mean. Of course you know what I mean, because I’m talking to myself and pretend it’s you. It’s not like you can actually hear me. JOURNALIST Depends who you think you’re talking to. PUB OWNER Holy fuck! The JOURNALIST appears, beer bottle in hand, and lounges into the other chair. 41

JOURNALIST Well I’ve never heard it called that, though I did once spend a weekend with a model who had a tendency to shout "Oh God" a lot when we- PUB OWNER Who let you in? JOURNALIST That’s cute. Modem medicine may have advanced admirably, but your security system’s still in the dark ages. PUB OWNER Thanks for letting me know; I’ll get on that. JOURNALIST Who were you talking to? PUB OWNER Shouldn’t you be flitting off somewhere on your broom by now? JOURNALIST I’m hardly going to waste time and energy enchanting household cleaning supplies for transportation when the highway system and the metro are both perfectly sufficient. PUB OWNER I figured something with a bit more flare would appeal to the dramatic tendencies of a woman who used to turn into a giant black bird. JOURNALIST You’re becoming a dreadful bore in your old age, Bedwyr. PUB OWNER Cer i grqfu, sguthan. JOURNALIST That’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me. 42

PUB OWNER What do you want, Morgana? JOURNALIST Company. PUB OWNER Don’t fuck with me. JOURNALIST I didn’t know that was option, or I would have proposed that to start with. (suddenly serious, quiet) But really, I just wanted the company. PUB OWNER I find it hard to believe that you, of all people, have trouble finding company for an evening. JOURNALIST That’s not the kind of company I want. PUB OWNER What other kind is there? JOURNALIST Somebody who knows. Somebody who has even the slightest shred of understanding for the life - the lives - I’ve lived. I didn’t get it as easy as you all did. PUB OWNER This was easy? You’re out of your damn mind. JOURNALIST You only had to do it once. One "click," as you call it, and you get one new set of memories. That’s nothing. PUB OWNER I don’t follow. 43

JOURNALIST Do you remember the fall of Rome? The rise of the Xang Dynasty? The French Revolution, the rule of Peron, The defeat of the Spanish Armada, the Holocaust, Pompeii, tsunamis, hurricanes, plagues? I do. I got to live through all of them. (with a sarcastic laugh) What, you all think I chose to just stick around for a few centuries? That I didn’t have anything better to do, so I thought I’d meddle about in the affairs of men for a few thousand years? You have no idea how lucky you are. You all got a fresh start every generation; if nothing stirred the secrets to the surface, you got to live out your life, whatever it might have been that time around, and peacefully slip into the next one, none the wiser. I didn’t get that luxury. I had to watch empires rise and fall, see kings come and go, watch the world tear itself apart, and then rebuild only for the pleasure of destroying everything again, and I had to do it alone. Over and over again. And don’t think I didn’t try to wake you to come along for the ride with me, because believe me, I did, every chance I got, and it never worked. All the powers and magic I had ever learned couldn’t find you, buried in your mythic slumber. Something is different now. Something is stirring the memories to the surface. It has to be him. And I want to find him. PUB OWNER Why? JOURNALIST Why not? You’re the one who keeps on looking for all the answers, all your theories about reincarnation or divine intervention. Why aren’t you trying to find him? Why aren’t you spending every waking moment looking for him so you can ask him what the hell is going on? PUB OWNER ...maybe I already know. Maybe I’ve already found him. 44

JOURNALIST Bullshit. You might have hidden that from me, even from Lancelot and Parsifal maybe, but you never would have kept that a secret from Gwenyfar. PUB OWNER Check. JOURNALIST And mate. You don’t have any excuses left, Bedwyr. Not with me. PUB OWNER Then why make Lance help you? JOURNALIST Because unlike you, I think he’ll actually do it. PUB OWNER How did you know he’d be here? JOURNALIST Because you’re the lodestone, Bedwyr of the Perfect Sinews. You think all of you showing up here was an accident? We’re all drawn to you; I don’t know why, but everyone somehow turns up where you are. So, I just...boosted the signal a little. The easiest way to find a needle in a haystack is to drag a magnet through it. You’re a magnet. So I wrote a little article, cast a little enchantment on it, and now the haystack is coming to you. PUB OWNER And you think eventually one of the "needles" that pops out of the crowd will be Arthur? JOURNALIST You were the first man he knighted, and the last man left standing beside him. PUB OWNER You’re his sister. 45

JOURNALIST The family embarrassment. PUB OWNER I’m pretty sure the illegitimate incest-born son who tried to murder him trumps you for that title, sony. JOURNALIST Arthur was proud of Mordred before the boy turned on him. He loved him. PUB OWNER He loved you too. He loved everyone. That’s what made him a great king. JOURNALIST That’s what got him killed. PUB OWNER Would you have done better? JOURNALIST Would you? PUB OWNER Oh, I know I would have been terrible at being in charge. But we’re not talking about me. How come you remember everything and we don’t? JOURNALIST Because I’m magic? PUB OWNER I’m serious. JOURNALIST So am I. Not that I ever want to admit to Sir Mistakes-a-Lot having a point, but he is right about the things we all have in common. We all outlived Arthur, and we all feel guilty for it. PUB OWNER And we all loved him. 46

JOURNALIST He loved everyone; everyone loved him. His downfall, Lancelot’s too, was that he loved too much and didn’t temper that with a sense of rationality and understanding of human nature. PUB OWNER You knew Lance would want to find Jenny. JOURNALIST He died with her name on his lips after thirty years of penitent silence. Of course he wants to find her, possibly more than he wants to find Arthur. PUB OWNER How’d you know I’d give him the address? JOURNALIST Because, Bedwyr Bedrydant, like all other wise ancients who are met on quests, you know he has to make his own mistakes. This game is older than we are, and stretches farther back into the memory of the earth than we can reach. We don’t make the rules- PUB OWNER -we just abide by them. So what is it that you have that I want, eh? Quid pro quo, you owe me your piece of the trade, yes? JOURNALIST I thought I found you, once before. I knew it was you, if it was anyone. Must have been...oh, 200 years ago. Austria, I think. You would have liked it. All the men dressed to the nines and all the women in beautiful ball gowns... PUB OWNER Because I look like the kind of guest who gets invited to high-society parlies. JOURNALIST It wasn’t your looks. It was your sense of humor. You were the stable-master to a count I was fond of- 47

PUB OWNER Morgana. The trade. The JOURNALIST gets up and straddles the PUB OWNER’s lap. PUB OWNER (unamused) I thought you weren’t looking for that kind of company. JOURNALIST Shhhh. I need you to concentrate for me. The JOURNALIST lifts the beer bottle and holds it between their faces, murmuring some quiet arcane magic. The lightsflicker, and suddenly the bottle illuminates simultaneously with the empty space, revealing the ARTIST (as set at the top o f Canto 3). PUB OWNER Scrying? You couldn’t just Facebook-stalk them? "Lancelot and Guinevere are in a relationship and it’s complicated." JOURNALIST What you want, what you’ve always wanted, my dear, is to know what’s going to happen. PUB OWNER I don’t need to see the future; that’s your department, witch. JOURNALIST You want to know what’s going to happen. You’ve always wanted to know, because you can’t bear the thought of history repeating itself. You want to know that you aren’t going to be alone. Again. I can show you. Do you want your piece of the trade or do you forfeit? THE PUB OWNER hold the JOURNALIST’S gaze. PUB OWNER Okay. Show me. 48

The JOURNALIST sets the bottle on the table. They gaze into it as the light above the table dims, transitioning into...

Canto 3 ...the opposite side ofthe stage from the table, the nonspecific privacy o f someplace public, like a park. The ARTIST sits on a bench or a blanket, listlessly sketching. The CEO steps into the light and just stands, watching the ARTIST for a long time. The longer the CEO stands there, the more purposeful the ARTIST’s sketching becomes. The tranquility o f the moment is broken when the ARTIST abruptly drops the sketchbook. ARTIST Dammit. The CEO deliberately coughs (or makes some noise) and crosses in toward the ARTIST CEO Hey there....everything okay? ARTIST Hmm? Oh, yeah. Just got a little carried away. I guess. CEO Work or pleasure? ARTIST Um, both, I guess. I mean, I do it for a living, but I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t love it, so... CEO Yeah. That’s...that’s good. May I? ARTIST Sure, whatever. It’s just scribbles. The CEO sits next to the ARTIST and picks up the sketchbook and studies it. 49

CEO This is amazing. I mean, even for a rough sketch...the details are already popping. It looks just like- ARTIST Oh, you’ve been to Somerset before? CEO I...yes, but it’s been a long, very long time. ARTIST You don’t forget places like that though. You can feel the history in their presence. CEO They always get this bit wrong, the top here, when they tiy to reconstruct what the ruins must have looked like. They base the shape on later constructions, but this is what I remember. ARTIST (suddenly wary) Is it? CEO I mean, from other architecture of the time- ARTIST And what time would that be? CEO I meant that- ARTIST Oh god...I should have known, when I started sketching the stupid Abbey again I should have....Who are you? CEO I’m sony, I didn’t mean- 50

ARTIST No, I mean, who are you? CEO ...you don’t recognize me? ARTIST I’m not Bedivere with his fucking preternatural ability to read people’s souls, or whatever that bullshit is supposed to be. Did he tell you where I am...who I am? CEO I needed to see you. ARTIST Why? Why me? CEO Look, Jenny, I know this is all /really complicated- ARTIST That’s an understatem-oh my god...Lance? CEO -but I didn’t believe him, didn’t want to, but then you came up, and I thought if anything would prove /it’s all real- ARTIST No, no, don’t... CEO -so I needed to find you and...I knew it was you the minute I saw you. Jenny- The CEO moves to embrace the ARTIST, but the ARTIST quickly pulls away. ARTIST You need to go. CEO What? 51

ARTIST Go. You need to go. I have to...you can’t... The ARTIST turns away, visibly shaken. CEO Guinevere...I thought - well, I hoped you would be glad- ARTIST I told you I didn’t want to see you again. CEO What? When? ARTIST When you came back to see me. At the Abbey. CEO At the Abbey...? (looking at the sketch again) You mean at Glastonbury? Back then? ARTIST I am going to kill Bedivere if I ever see him again. CEO It’s not...I made him tell me. Jenny, please, talk to me. ARTIST There’s nothing to talk about, Lance. CEO Nothing to talk about? My god, Jenny, we’ve been somehow reunited across the bounds of time and space and you won’t even look me in the eye? A thousand years pass, and we endure, and we have nothing to talk about? ARTIST No. Nothing. Please go. 52

A pause. CEO Bedivere said you were the first one who found him. ARTIST Yeah. It was an accident. We were at the same diner. CEO Oh? ARTIST (giving in) I had been traveling a lot...I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere and walked to this diner to grab a bite and wait for a tow-truck. I was sitting at the counter and this grungy homeless guy came in and sat next to me, and we accidentally made eye contact and just...knew. So I got a motel room and he got a shower and we spent a week trying to make sense of...anything. CEO Did he explain to you his whole theory about- ARTIST Yes. At that point he’d been studying... well, studying ^...solidly for about a year, trying to put the pieces together. We always sort of guessed that finding each other was a sign that he was on the right track. CEO Do you think he’s right? ARTIST About what? CEO Any of it? I mean, it doesn’t seem even remotely plausible, but here we are- ARTIST Honestly, I don’t put a lot of thought into it. 53

CEO Don’t you want to know- ARTIST No, I don’t. I was perfectly happy with my life, this life, for a very long time, and then all of this shit got dredged out of the murky depths of memory and lucked everything up. That’s why I declined to join Bedivere’s little "Home for Wayward Timestream- Displaced Persons," and also why I explicitly told him not to tell anyone else where I was. A pause. CEO Percy’s there now. Working at Bedivere’s bar. ARTIST (turning abruptly to the CEO) God, you still don’t know when to just drop something and leave it alone, do you? Glad to know nothing’s changed. CEO Then you know I still love you. A bomb-drop pause. ARTIST Lance- CEO And if nothing’s really changed, then you still love me too. Don’t you? Jenny, you know we were meant to find each other. There’s no other explanation for this. ARTIST Where’s Elaine? 54

CEO Who? ARTIST Your wife, Lancelot The mother of your son. Did you go looking for her too? CEO No. ARTIST Why not? CEO That’s not what I- ARTIST You wanted to talk to me? This is what I want to talk about Why didn’t you go looking for your wife, before anything else? CEO Because she’s dead. ARTIST So are we! CEO No, I mean...she died before, like Kay and Lucan- ARTIST -and Galahad, and Gawain, and all the others, yes, I am aware of that theoiy. But you said before you didn’t want to believe everything spouting from the infinite font of wisdom that is our One-Handed Welshman. So why not try to prove him wrong? Why not look for Elaine? CEO (erupting) Because I didn’t love her! I didn’t love any of them! There were only two people in the world I ever loved, truly loved, and... 55

ARTIST Ah, there it is. The CEO is startled. CEO Who else have you seen? ARTIST What? CEO ...nevermind. ARTIST What’s the matter? CEO You sounded like someone else for a minute. ARTIST I am someone else. I’m not who you remember, or think you remember. CEO Do you think it’s true? Any of it? Or are we really all just crazy- ARTIST Like I said, I don’t really think about it at all- CEO Come with me. We don’t have to go back to the others, we can just...go- ARTIST No. CEO -Together. You and I, like we always wanted! ARTIST Like you wanted. 56

CEO Please, Jenny- ARTIST I’m with someone else. CEO ...what? ARTIST I’m with someone. And I intend to stay with them. CEO What about us? ARTIST What about us? We might have been ancient lovers in a myth, so you want me to just pick up and run away from the life I have now? CEO I will. To be with you. ARTIST You’ve always been better at running than I have. CEO That’s not fair- ARTIST No, but it’s true. You ran. I stayed. CEO And I came back, for you! He was going to kill you- ARTIST What else could he have done? Mordred tied his hands with his own laws, the laws we broke. CEO If he really loved you- 57

ARTIST (icy cold) Don’t you dare ever say that Arthur didn’t love me as much as you did. We both broke his heart. I’m not going to do that to someone I love again. CEO Then you don’t love me. The ARTISTpulls a worn, many-times-refolded piece ofsketch paper out o f a pocket, unfolds it, and hands it to the CEO. ARTIST My lover is a writer. And for a while, we lived near this huge, beautiful lake, so we would take picnics out to the banks and sit there to write and sketch. We did it all the time, so I never thought anything of it, but this one particular day...the light was glimmering off the surface of the lake, and the sunlight was streaming through the trees in the most magical way - birds singing and fresh spring flowers blooming - and one of us said something that we both laughed at, and I turned to look at my lover’s face and everything was suddenly...wrong. I had this sudden overwhelming sense of guilt, like I wasn’t supposed to be there, wasn’t supposed to be alone with this person, that someone else was waiting for me, and it just...stayed. This nagging feeling lingering in the back of my mind, and it made no sense but it kept getting worse. And my lover knew something was wrong, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell what it was, because it sounded stupid, or crazy. And one day I sat down and drew that, the face that I kept seeing in the back of my mind. CEO It’s Arthur. From back then. ARTIST Yeah. Finally, I said I wanted to go do some traveling, alone, for a little while. It had (CONT’D) 58

ARTIST been months since the day at the lake, and I hadn’t been able to finish, or start, a single drawing or painting...except that one. And my kind, selfless lover said okay. Do whatever you need, for however long you need to, and I’ll be here when you get back, if you want to come back to me. And I got in the car and just drove, and drove, and drove until the day I got a flat and a ghost from the past sat down next to me in a diner. CEO I had someone too. In this life. ARTIST And that doesn’t matter to you? CEO Why should it? ARTIST Because this is your life! Are you just going to walk away from your life? CEO Which life? Because you’re my life too. You always have been. ARTIST We can’t have it both ways. CEO Why not? Something brought us back together- ARTIST You. You brought us back together by hunting me down, even though I said I didn’t want to see you anymore. CEO That was in a different lifetime! ARTIST You’re right! It was. And in this lifetime, we’re complete strangers. 59

CEO ...Is that what you want? ARTIST Please, go. CEO Will you make him go too? ARTIST Who? CEO Arthur. Your king. Your husband. ARTIST He’s not coming back. At least, not like that. In the dim light o f the table, the JOURNALISTpicks up the glowing bottle. CEO How could you possibly know that? ARTIST Intuition. Gut feeling. Wild guess. He’s not coming back, whatever Bedivere and the others may think. CEO Then what are we all doing here? Suddenly, the JOURNALIST chugs the rest o fthe liquid in the bottle. The lights on the ARTIST and CEO abruptly go black. The JOURNALIST and the PUB OWNER stare at each other. PUB OWNER The hell? JOURNALIST Time’s up. 60

PUB OWNER You’re a bitch, you know that? JOURNALIST Just maintaining expectations. The PUB OWNER grabs the empty bottle and throws it at the wall behind them. The JOURNALIST starts when it shatters. JOURNALIST What was that for? PUB OWNER I’m tired of sorcery; I want a straight answer. JOURNALIST About what? PUB OWNER Were you scared I would learn something you didn’t want me to know? Or were you scared that she’s right? JOURNALIST I am not- PUB OWNER Of course you’re scared. We both are. We all are. And we’re all scared of the same thing. JOURNALIST Oh, really? What’s that? PUB OWNER Ending up alone. Again. They stare for a moment, and the JOURNALIST leans in and kisses the PUB OWNER. JOURNALIST I changed my mind. I think I do want that kind of company. 61

PUB OWNER Cut the bull shit. JOURNALIST Yes, I’m scared! I’m scared of getting lost in the past as the future repeats itself forever. I just want to be in the present, for a moment, and not have to think. A pause. PUB OWNER Bedroom’s upstairs. JOURNALIST I’ll be gone before you get up in the morning. PUB OWNER Good. The light above the tableflickers and goes out.

Canto 4 The Prydwen Pub, as it was at the beginning o fthe play, save that tonight it is empty. The PUB OWNER wipes down the bar-top with a rag, while the BARKEEP cleans up broken glass around the PUB OWNER’s usual table. BARKEEP And what happened exactly? PUB OWNER I was drunk. Knocked it over. Couldn’t be arsed to clean it up before I passed out. BARKEEP Yeah, sure. PUB OWNER What? BARKEEP Sixth time this month. PUB OWNER I’m an alcoholic. BARKEEP I’ve seen you win jousts when you were four sheets to the wind. PUB OWNER So? BARKEEP So I don’t believe that...wait. Are you...? The PUB OWNER winks and the BARKEEP groans in disgust. BARKEEP Bedivere, no! She’s gonna eat your soul. PUB OWNER She’s a witch, not a succubus. BARKEEP She’s destroying all our glassware. PUB OWNER Send her a bill. BARKEEP And what, get turned into a newt? No thanks. PUB OWNER You’re only mad because you don’t like her. BARKEEP Neither do you! PUB OWNER No, but I like keeping tabs on her. 63

BARKEEP You do realize this isn’t what "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" means, right? They are interrupted by the CEO, who enters and stops abruptly, unsure what else to do. PUB OWNER Ah, the prodigal son. BARKEEP You came back. CEO Yeah. PUB OWNER Alone. CEO ...yeah. Quiet in here tonight. PUB OWNER Yeah, business has sort of slowed. I guess some of the enchantment of the place has worn off. CEO I’m sorry. PUB OWNER I’m not. Long pause. CEO Why didn’t you tell me? 64

PUB OWNER That’s not how it works, and you know that A quest is like a riddle; the Guide can only give the Hero hints, not answers. CEO (to the BARKEEP) Did you know? BARKEEP Know what? About Queen Guinevere? CEO Know that she- PUB OWNER (coming out from behind the bar) Perce just knows that she’s out there and doesn’t wanna talk to us. CEO You still could have at least told me that. PUB OWNER Did you not understand- CEO I don’t understand any of this! BARKEEP It’s the rules of the quest They’re stupid, but..we can’t break them. CEO Why not? BARKEEP I don’t know! We’ve tried. We can’t...it’s like the deal you made with Morgana - once you agreed, Bedivere had to participate, even if he didn’t want to. We just..that’s the way this works. 65

CEO But this isn’t real! There is no quest, there is no hero, and there is no fucking king coming back from the dead to save the world! We’re all insane, or sick, or tripping balls, or something... The CEO slumps into a nearby chair. The BARKEEP gets behind the bar and starts opening bottlesfor each ofthem, which the PUB OWNER passes around. PUB OWNER I’m sony things didn’t work out. CEO Yeah...me too. I’m not the hero of this quest. If that’s what it is. PUB OWNER Well someone’s got to be. It sure as hell isn’t me. BARKEEP (laughing bitterly) Yeah, I missed that boat too. PUB OWNER So if it’s not you, who is it? CEO I don’t know. Maybe there’s someone else out there we haven’t found yet. Or maybe it’ll be someone new, someone better than all of us. PUB OWNER Wouldn’t that be nice. BARKEEP We’re all either quest-givers or quest-bearers, and sooner or later we’ll figure out who’s who. We always do. 66

CEO Well, until then, I suppose I ought to get going. PUB OWNER Why? CEO I made a deal with the devil’s dam, remember? I’m supposed to find Arthur now. PUB OWNER I wouldn’t wony about it. CEO But won’t Morgana- PUB OWNER Is the worst you can imagine she might do to you any worse than where you are right now? CEO ...Shit. PUB OWNER I’m full of it. BARKEEP No kidding. CEO Jenny said...she’s pretty certain Arthur isn’t coming back. PUB OWNER Yeah. CEO She told you? PUB OWNER ...not exactly. How does she know? 67

CEO Intuition. What if she’s right? If he doesn’t come back, then what are we all doing here? A long pause. BARKEEP Surviving? PUB OWNER ...I’ll drink to that. Waes hael. BARKEEP Drink, hael. CEO Drink, hael. They lift their bottles in salute and all drink. CEO So now we just...wait? Wait for another quest? Great. And how long will that- The phone behind the bar rings. Puzzled, the BARKEEP hands it to the PUB OWNER who answers. PUB OWNER Hello? (glancing at the others) ...yeah, they’re right here with me. Everyone’s eyes widen. Blackout. End o f Play.