ABSTRACT SATTERLUND, TRAVIS DELMAR. Fighting for an Authentic Self: An Ethnographic Study of Recreational Boxers. (Under the direction of Michael L. Schwalbe.) This study is an ethnographic examination of the rank and file recreational boxers—mostly white and middle-class males—who frequented a gym in a mid-sized southeastern city in the United States. I conducted field research as a participant observer for nineteen months and also interviewed forty-eight fellow boxers and the gym’s two owner/trainers. This research shows that gym members used the cultural meanings associated with boxing as resources to construct boxing as an activity from which they could derive gendered identity rewards. At the same time, however, both gender and social class complicated matters considerably, creating dilemmas for the middle-class white recreational boxers, and for the women who claimed space in a masculinist domain. As such, I show how authenticity of the gym was socially constructed to meet these identity rewards and also to resolve these dilemmas. Gym members were attracted to boxing, at least in part, as an avenue to address feelings of what it means to enact manhood. Such displays of masculinity were important for these men because of the perceived limitation of their professional identities. While most of the men had secure middle class jobs, these jobs weren’t the primary basis for their feelings of self worth, especially in relation to their identity as “men.” In essence, then, the boxing gym offered a means for the men to compensate for their inability to signify power, control, and toughness in their professional lives. Moreover, for the men at the gym in particular, boxing served as a resource to gain valuable cultural capital. Women also sought identity rewards from boxing and had reasons to want to signify masculine qualities. For them, too, boxing was a way to signify agency and strength. Yet, they also faced dilemmas in seeking to distance themselves from other feminine women but without being viewed as too masculine. The final chapter has implications for the gym’s activity in terms of the inequalities that are maintained and (re)produced. FIGHTING FOR AN AUTHENTIC SELF: AN ETHNOGRAPHIC STUDY OF RECREATIONAL BOXERS By Travis Delmar Satterlund A dissertation submitted to the Graduate Faculty of North Carolina State University in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy SOCIOLOGY Raleigh, NC 2006 APPROVED BY: _______________________________ ______________________________ Dr. Richard L. Della Fave Dr. Michael A. Messner _______________________________ ______________________________ Dr. Stacy De Coster Dr. Barbara J. Risman _______________________________ Dr. Michael L. Schwalbe Chair of Advisory Committee DEDICATED TO JACKSON AND QUINN ii BIOGRAPHY Travis Satterlund grew up in Southern California with a dream of playing shortstop for the Los Angeles Dodgers. This dream derailed when he realized that the Dodgers weren’t looking for a scrappy but light-hitting slap-hitter with no apparent base- stealing propensities. Alas, after hanging up his cleats after college (Chico State) and working stints as a waiter, bartender, mover, and Teamster, he became a high school history and American government teacher at Pleasant Valley Senior High (PVSH) in Chico, California. Travis earned a Master’s Degree in political science while teaching high school, and after five years at PVSH, Travis moved with his wife, Aly, to North Carolina to pursue his doctorate in Sociology. Jackson Satterlund was born August 17, 2000, two days prior to the beginning of Travis’ graduate school career at North Carolina State University. The next three years were a blur of writing papers, changing diapers, and an abundance of sleep deprivation. Travis and his family then moved to San Francisco, California, in September 2003. In the time Travis has lived in San Francisco until now (2006), he has simultaneously worked as a part-time collegiate instructor, carried out ethnographic data collection in the pubs of San Francisco (Really!), maintained childcare responsibility for Jackson, attended a part-time evening law school program, and worked to complete this dissertation. His second son, Quinn Satterlund, was born on September 25, 2005, and added very nicely to the above list of San Francisco experiences. He is scheduled to earn his law degree in 2007, at which time Aly, Jackson, and Quinn will have put a moratorium on all future advanced degree programs for Travis. Who needs the Dodgers anyway? iii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS . I would like to thank the many individuals who made this undertaking possible. In keeping with the theme of this research, this study was akin to a 15 round, knock- down, drag-out, championship fight. There were occasions when I thought I had the fight in my pocket, and other times when I felt bloodied and battered. Fortunately, I had many people in my corner who kept me battling until the end, never letting me think about throwing in the proverbial towel. For this I am appreciative. My chair, Michael Schwalbe, deserves special attention. He not only provided the intellectual and technical foundation which guided this research process, it was his queries, prodding, and intellectual support that made this dissertation much more sociologically insightful had he not been there. He served as my mentor, coach, trainer, and friend, going the full 15 rounds with me—gloves and all—and for that I am, and always will be, grateful. I am also appreciative to committee members Barbara Risman, Rick Della Fave, Stacy DeCoster, and Mike Messner, for their valuable feedback and support as I undertook this process. I would like to thank the members of KO Gym, and especially the gym’s owner- trainers, Jan and Bill, who were always willing to assist me in my seemingly endless quest for answers. Somehow they also turned this “robot” with gloves into something of a decent pugilist, which speaks to their skill and patience as trainers. Finally, my wife, Aly, provided both financial and emotional support through this long, arduous process, and without such support this study would have been impossible. She understood my desire to complete this challenge, and she never wavered in her belief in me. I realize this has not been easy for her to carry such a heavy burden, but babe, we did it! iv TABLE OF CONTENTS 1. INTRODUCTION ..........................................................................................................1 Method ............................................................................................................................5 Setting .............................................................................................................................8 KO Boxers ...............................................................................................................12 Motivations to Box ..................................................................................................16 Studies of Boxing..........................................................................................................18 Gender, Masculinity, and Patriarchy ............................................................................23 Masculinity ..............................................................................................................25 Patriarchy .................................................................................................................26 Class..............................................................................................................................27 Sport and the Reproduction of Inequality.....................................................................28 The Meaning of Sports.............................................................................................29 Dissertation Overview ..................................................................................................32 2. CONSTRUCTING AN AUTHENTIC BOXING EXPERIENCE...............................36 Real, But Not Too Real.................................................................................................37 A Hierarchy of Reality and Risk of Stigma..................................................................39 The Psycho-Squad ...................................................................................................44 Managing the Reality of Boxing...................................................................................51 Props ........................................................................................................................52 Real Training ...........................................................................................................58 Emphasizing Technique...........................................................................................60 Sparring....................................................................................................................62 A Female Trainer in a Man’s World.............................................................................64 The Symbolic Value of Suffering.................................................................................70 3. THE (GENDERED AND “CLASSED) SATISFACTIONS OF BOXING.................................................................................................................78 Middle-Class Jobs and a Working-Class Sport ............................................................82 Dissatisfaction With the