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Home , Aki (James Bond), Alec Trevelyan, Barry Nelson, Bill Tanner, Brad Whitaker, Elektra King

THE

QUANTUM OF MISSUS GUIDE TO THE FILMS

Bond : as CIA agent “card sense” Jimmy Bond Villains : () Allies : Valerie Mathis Clarence Leiter Locations: France Villain’s Plot: Le Chiffre intends to win at baccarat in order to make money for the USSR The one with: black and white TV show

Bond : Villains : Dr. No Allies : () () () () Sylvia Trench Gadgets: Geiger counter Locations: Jamaica Villain’s Plot: Jamming US and Soviet rocket controls and communications on behalf of SPECTRE and to get revenge for his seeking employment with both superpowers being declined. Theme song : , Three Blind Mice, Under The Mango Tree The one with: the woman in the white bikini coming out of the sea; Bond being a “very nerrr-vus passin-jurr”

Bond : Sean Connery Villains : (unseen) “Red” Grant Allies: Kerim Bey M Major Boothroyd/ () Miss Moneypenny Gadgets: Briefcase containing gold sovereigns, knife, exploding capabilities, compact rifle and ammunition Locations: Istanbul, Venice Villain’s plot: Recently defected SMERSH agent Rosa Klebb is charged by Blofeld, head of SPECTRE, with carrying out a plot to embarrass the Russians and the British by (a) stealing a coding machine from the Russians and (b) filming Bond having sex with the Russian cipher clerk who, believing she is working under Moscow’s orders, will entice him to Istanbul on the possibility of obtaining the coding machine. Theme Song : From Russia With Love by Matt Monro The one with: the Gypsy women fighting, the sewers of Istanbul, the , Red wine with fish, Grant’s garotte watch Rosa Klebb’s poisoned switchblade shoes

Bond : Sean Connery Villains: Auric Allies: Felix Leiter (Cec Linder) Jill Masterton M Q Miss Moneypenny Gadgets: Tricked out Aston Martin DB5, Locations: Miami, Switzerland, Kentucky Villain’s Plot: Goldfinger intends to irradiate all the gold in Fort Knox in order to increase the value of his own holdings. Title song: Goldfinger by Shirley Bassey The one with: Bond unzipping a wetsuit to reveal white evening dress, “Positively shocking”, Bond’s blue terrycloth shorty dressing gown, Jill Masterton being suffocated by being painted gold, Bond knows all about brandy, the golf match, Oddjob’s steel rimmed bowler hat, the pull-back-and-reveal sniper on the winding mountain road, machine gun toting old woman gatekeeper, the “laser” beam: “Do you expect me to talk?” “No, Mr Bond, I expect you to die”, Goldfinger’s huge model of Fort Knox and surrounding areas, Pussy Galore’s sexual preferences being altered by a kiss from Bond Pussy Galore’s flying circus Electrocuting Oddjob against the bars in Fort Knox The bomb countdown timer being stopped at “007” Goldfinger being sucked out of the aeroplane window

Bond: Sean Connery Villains: Ernst Stavro Blofeld (unseen) Fiona Volpe Allies : Domino Petachi Felix Leiter (Rik Van Nutter) Patricia Fearing Gadgets: Jet pack, Miniature oxygen tank, underwater camera Locations: The Bahamas Villain’s Plot: SPECTRE steal two nuclear missiles by bribing a pilot to undergo plastic surgery and threaten to destroy a major US or UK city unless a ransom of $100 million dollars is paid. Bond tracks the missiles to the Caribbean via recognising and befriending the bribed pilot’s sister. Theme song : by Tom Jones The one with: the 1980s remake () the jet pack, the electrocuting chair at the villain’s meeting, the health spa (but not the one with Bomber from Auf Weidersehn, Pet), Bond forcing himself on a spa worker but she ends up liking it, so it’s OK (it’s not OK), the baddie with the eyepatch, the carnival, the long underwater sequences

Bond : (Sir James Bond) Villains : Le Chiffre () Dr Noah (Woody Allen) Agent Mimi Lynd Allies : M (John Huston) Miss Moneypenny aka James Bond 007 (Barbara Bouchet) Agent Cooper aka James Bond 007 “The Detainer” aka James Bond 007 Evelyn Tremble aka James Bond 007 Mata Bond Gadgets: Video equipped watch, sleeping pills Locations: Scotland, Swinging , East Berlin, Villain’s Plot: With a successful programme of eliminating western agents via sex well underway, SMERSH seek to discredit James Bond’s celibate image, raise funds by selling compromising photographs of military leaders and, ultimately, use biological warfare to make all women beautiful and kill all men over 4 foot 6. Le Chiffre is also seeking to win a game of baccarat at Casino Royale in order to cover up his embezzlement of SMERSH funds. Theme song : Theme from Casino Royale by Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass, The Look of Love by Dusty Springfield, Have No Fear Bond Is Here by Mike Redway The one with: the retired James Bond, M’s castle with his widow and 16 daughters replaced by SMERSH agents, The self-driving milk float, Peter Sellers as baccarat expert Evelyn Tremble, refusing to appear in the same shot as Orson Welles Bernard Cribbins as a taxi driver Ronnie Corbett as a robot A psychedelic torture scene ending with Lynd massacring everyone with machine gun bagpipes and Chic Murray shooting Orson Welles through a TV set A giant flying saucer landing in Trafalgar Square (the apogee of the 1960s, cinema, culture and the history of Britain, if not Western Civilisation itself) Dr Noah’s pop-art HQ under Casino Royale The big fight at and Dr Noah counting down to the ultimate explosion of his own atomic pills

Bond : Sean Connery Villains : Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Donald Pleasance) Helga Brandt Allies : Kissy Suzuki Tiger Tanaka Dikko Henderson M (Bernard Lee) Q Miss Moneypenny (Lois Maxwell) Gadgets: Pocket-sized safe combination decoder, Little Nellie (portable helicopter), Dart firing cigarettes Locations: Japan Villain’s Plot: Working for an unnamed superpower, SPECTRE steal US and Soviet rockets from outer- space in order to provoke a war between them, allowing the unnamed superpower to achieve world domination. His death having been faked to give a new element of surprise, Bond traces the launches of the third-party rockets to the sea of Japan. Theme song : You Only Live Twice by Nancy Sinatra The one with: Bond being shot and seemingly killed in the pre-titles M’s office in a submarine The fight at Kobe docks Bond and Tanaka being bathed by beautiful women : “In Japan, men come first and women come second”, “Don’t get soap in my eye” Bond “yellowing-up” to go undercover as a Japanese fisherman and getting married The hollowed out volcano lair with piranha pool Our first sight of Blofeld

Bond : Villains : Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Telly Savalas) Irma Bunt Allies : Tracy di Vicenzo, later Bond Marc-Ange Draco Sir Hillary Bray M Q Miss Moneypenny Gadgets: Enormo-sized safe combination decoder with incorporated photocopier Locations: Portugal, Corsica, Switzerland Villain’s Plot: Blofeld sets up an aversion and allergy treatment centre in the Alps where patients’ cures are dependent on them using hypnosis. Blofeld intends to hold the world to ransom by threatening to use his hypnotised patients to release a virus that will destroy all crops and farmed animals. Blofeld’s price is immunity for all past crimes and recognition as the rightful claimant to the title of Compte de Bleuchamp. Theme song : On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (instrumental) by John Barry, We Have All The Time In The World by Louis Armstrong, Do You Know How Christmas Trees Are Grown by Nina The one with: “the other fella” Bond resigning after being removed from the hunt for Blofeld The mountain top villain’s lair Bond impersonating Sir Hillary Bray in full highland dress The stock car race The bob-sleigh fight Bond getting married Mrs Bond being shot on the way from the wedding

Bond : Sean Connery Villains : Ernst Stavro Blofeld () Mr Wint and Mr Kidd Bambi and Thumper Allies : Plenty O’Toole Felix Leiter (Norman Burton) Willard White M Q Miss Moneypenny Gadgets: fake fingerprint, “zorbing” ball, Locations: South Africa, Amsterdam, Las Vegas Villain’s Plot: Blofeld sets up an international smuggling ring to supply him with diamonds necessary to focus a laser satellite weapon. Blofeld uses the weapon to destroys nuclear installations in China, the and the , then proposes an international auction for global nuclear supremacy… Theme song: Diamonds Are Forever by Shirley Bassey The one with: Blofeld duplicates “Right idea…” “…but the wrong pussy” Bond knows all about sherry Miss Moneypenny undercover as a customs officer The lift fight in Amsterdam Bond almost being cremated Q using gadgets to win on the slot machines Klaus Hergershiemer, G section, checking radiation sensors The moon buggy chase Bond trapped in a pipe Bond’s shorty salmon pink tie The oil rig final confrontation The cruise ship finale The funniest script : “If God had meant man to fly, Mr Wint…” “He would have given him wings, Mr Kidd” “Weren’t you a brunette when I came in?” “Which do you prefer?” “Oh, as long as the collars and cuffs match…” “Who’s the stiff?” “My brother.” “I got a bruddah” “Small world” “I’m Plenty” “But of course you are” “Plenty O’Toole” “Named after your father perhaps?” “I’m afraid you’ve caught me with more than my hands up.” “If I destroyed Kansas the world may not hear about it for months”

Bond : Villains : Mr Big/Dr Kananga Tee Hee Baron Samedi Allies : Solitaire Felix Leiter () M Miss Moneypenny Gadgets: Locations: Harlem, “San Monique” (island in the Caribbean), New Orleans Villain’s Plot: As Prime Minister of San Monique and underworld king-pin, Kananga/Big controls a large supply of heroin to the United States. He intends to flood the market with cheap heroin, increasing the number of addicts and driving competitors out of business before raising the price once he has a monopoly. Theme song : by Paul McCartney and Wings (also sung by BJ Arnau in the film itself) The one with: M and Moneypenny coming to Bond’s flat Bond’s coffee machine Bond listening to the theme song for the movie Tee Hee’s metal arm Solitaire’s 007 branded tarot cards Voodoo Bond tricking Solitaire into sleeping with him The double decker bus chase “Hey Jim, what’s happening baby!” The crocodile farm escape The boat chase on the Bayou Sheriff JW Pepper Kananga being inflated by a compressed air bullet

Bond : Roger Moore Villains : Scaramanga Nick Nack Allies : Mary Goodnight Lieutenant Hip M Q Miss Moneypenny Gadgets: Fake nipple Locations: Macau, , Scaramanga’s island Villain’s Plot: Professional assassin Scaramanga has taken over an experimental solar power plant and plans to sell the rights to the process to the highest bidder. Theme song : The Man With The Golden Gun by Lulu The one with: Scaramanga’s funhouse training/execution facility The golden gun assembled from a lighter and pen MI6 Hong Kong HQ in the sunken ocean liner Bond trapped at the martial arts school and saved by Hip’s young nieces The return of Sheriff JW Pepper The derelict bridge jump Scaramanga’s flying car The Bond/Scaramanga duel

Bond : Roger Moore Villains : Stromberg Naomi Allies : Agent XXX M Q Miss Moneypenny Minister Of Defence General Gogol Gadgets: Watch pager and ticker messaging device, submersible Lotus Esprit, jet ski Locations: , Egypt, Sardinia Villain’s Plot: Stromberg supports the development of a submarine tracking device in order to steal three nuclear submarines, one Russian, one American and one British, using his supertanker. He intends to launch missiles at Moscow and New York and rebuild human society underwater following the ensuing nuclear apocalypse. Theme song : Nobody Does It Better by Carly Simon The one with: the ski jump off a cliff and Union Jack parachute The octopod The submersible car The huge supertanker interior set “Keeping the British end up” The James Bond close harmony singers

Bond : Roger Moore Villains : Jaws Allies : Dr Holly Goodhead M Q Miss Moneypenny Minister of Defence Gadgets: Wrist dart gun, “Bondola” (hovercraft gondola), “007” branded mini camera Locations: , Venice, Rio de Janiero, Outer Space Villain’s Plot: Space shuttle manufacturer Hugo Drax plans to wipe out all human life on earth and repopulate the planet using the physically perfect specimens of humanity he will take to his shielded space station. One of his shuttles develops a fault meaning he has to steal back a shuttle he had leant to NASA. Theme song : by Shirley Bassey The one with: “Look after Mr Bond, see that some harm comes to him” The G-force centrifuge testing equipment The dog chase through the woods The chase through Venice The cable car fight on sugar loaf mountain Jaws’ girlfriend Bond goes into space “I think he’s attempting re-entry”

Bond : Roger Moore Villains : Kristatos Locke Not-Blofeld Allies : Melina Havelock Colombo Ferrara Q Miss Moneypenny , MI6 Chief of Staff (James Villiers) Minister of Defence Gadgets: Locations: Spain, , Corfu Villain’s Plot: KGB agent Kristatos is charged with retrieving a control system for Britain’s nuclear weapons that was in the Aegean sea when the disguised naval vessel was sunk by a WWII mine. Theme song: For Your Eyes Only by Sheena Easton The one with: Bond visiting his wife’s grave Not-Blofeld being dropped down an industrial chimney The talking parrot The 2CV The teenage ice skating protégé Bond kicking the car off the cliff Rock climbing Maggie Thatcher calling Bond to congratulate him

Bond : Roger Moore Villains : Kamal Khan Gobinda Magda General Orlov Allies : Vijay M (Robert Brown) Q Miss Moneypenny Minister of Defence Gadgets: Fake horse trailer, reversible jacket, mini-jet, miniature homing device, video watch, pen containing acid and listening device, fake crocodile skin Locations: Cuba, , East and West Villain’s Plot: Khan creates fake Russian artefacts to replace the originals supplied to him by General Orlov, which he sells in the west. Orlov intends to use the money received from Khan to fund his plan to expand Soviet influence in Western Europe. Theme song: All Time High by Rita Coolidge The one with: The mini jet The auction of faberge eggs The tuk-tuk chase in Mumbai The tiger hunt The Russian’s revolving conference room The circus train fight Bond dressed as a clown

Bond: Sean Connery Villains: Ernst Stavro Blofeld () Maximillian Largo Fatima Blush Allies: Domino Petachi Nigel Small-Fawcett Felix Leiter () M (Edward Fox) Q (Alec McCowan) Miss Moneypenny (Pamela Salem) Gadgets: Exploding pen, laser watch Locations: The Bahamas, Monaco, Morocco Villain’s Plot: SPECTRE steal two nuclear missiles by bribing a pilot to undergo eye surgery and threaten to destroy a major US city and destabilise the geology of the middle east unless a ransom of 25% of all spending on oil products is paid by each country in the world. Theme song: Never Say Never Again by Lani Hall The one with: Old man Connery The health spa (with Bomber from Auf Weidersehen, Pet being blinded by Bond’s super-strength wee wee) Largo’s shipboard control centre with built in one-way perving mirror Bond pretending to be a masseuse but it being OK because Domino likes it (it’s not OK) Strictly Bond Dancing The computer game Domination The motorbike chase Domino being sold to the highest bidder The horse jumping off the castle into the sea Bond vowing “never again” and Connery’s wink

Bond : Roger Moore Villains : Mayday Dr Carl Mortner Allies : Sir Godfrey Tibbett Pola Ivanova Achille Aubergine M (Robert Brown) Q (Desmond Llewelyn) Miss Moneypenny (Lois Maxwell) Gadgets: Almost x-ray sunglasses, ring camera, writing indentation reader, lock pick credit care, Snooper – robotic surveillance dog Locations: Siberia, France, Villain’s Plot: Rogue KGB agent Zorin plans to catastrophically flood silicon valley in order to give him a monopoly on the manufacture of microchips. Theme song: by Duran Duran The one with: Snowboarding to the fake Beach Boys MI6 at the races “The bubbles tickle my….Tchiakovsky!” Bond makes a quiche Fire truck chase Zorin blimp Golden Gate Bridge fight

Bond : Villains : Koskov Allies : Kara Milovy Kamran Shah General Pushkin Felix Leiter (John Terry) M Q Miss Moneypenny () Gadgets: whistle activated keyring Locations: Gibraltar, Bratislava, Vienna, Tangier, Afghanistan Villain’s Plot: Weapons procurement officer for the USSR Koskov tricks MI6 into believing he wishes to defect from the Soviet Union but after Bond facilitates this and frames General Pushkin for the recent deaths of western spies, fake Russian agents abduct him. In fact he has been embezzling state funds to purchase opium from the Mujahideen from whose sale he intends to make enough money to purchase the weapons he has been tasked with obtaining and make himself and arms dealer Brad Whitaker an extra profit. Theme song: by a-ha The one with: M’s office in a plane A man being shot through a pipe from behind the iron curtain The Vienna funfair The use of a cello case as a bobsleigh Bond teaming up with the mujahideen The fight on the cargo net hanging out of a plane

Bond : Timothy Dalton Villains : Franz Sanchez Dario Milton Krest Professor Joe Butcher Allies : Pam Bouvier Felix Leiter (David Hedison) Lupe Lamora Sharkey M Q Miss Moneypenny Gadgets: plastic explosive toothpaste, signature handprint rifle, laser polaroid camera, manta ray disguise Locations: Florida, “Isthmus” (Central American nation) Villain’s Plot: Sanchez smuggles cocaine by dissolving it in petrol to evade detection. He wishes to continue his operation but Bond, now working without MI6 sanction, seeks revenge for the maiming of Felix Leiter and the deaths of Felix’s wife and colleague. Theme song: by Gladys Knight The one with: Bond having his licence to kill revoked and acting outside MI6 orders Felix Leiter having his leg bitten off by a shark A man’s head exploding in a compression chamber The fake television evangelist whose retreat resort complex is the cover for the drug operation The petrol tanker chase Sanchez being set on fire by Bond

Bond : Villains : /006 General Ourumov Boris Grishenko Allies : Natalya Simonova Jack Wade Valentin Zukovsky M () Q Miss Moneypenny () Bill Tanner, MI6 Chief of Staff (Michael Kitchen) Gadgets: Swinging wire belt, grenade pen, watch with laser and detonator Locations: Siberia, Monte Carlo, St Petersburg, Cuba Villain’s Plot: Former MI6 agent Trevelyan plans to use the Goldeneye satellite weapons system to paralyse London as revenge for the repatriation of Liensk Cossacks to the Soviet Union after WWII. Theme song: Goldeneye by Tina Turner The one with: The dam bungee jump Catching up with and taking over a plummeting aeroplane Acknowledgement of Bond’s previous sexism and misogyny The St Petersburg tank chase

Bond : Pierce Brosnan Villains : Elliot Carver Stamper Allies : Jack Wade M Q Miss Moneypenny Charles Robinson, MI6 Deputy Chief of Staff Gadgets: mobile phone with built in stun gun, fingerprint scanner, lock pick, vehicle remote control, watch with detachable explosive charge Locations: Russia, Hamburg, Vietnam Villain’s Plot: Media baron Carver uses a stealth boat to sink a British frigate, staging the incident to appear as Chinese military aggression. Carver also steals a cruise missile from the sunken ship, planning to use it to wipe out the Chinese government to allow a particular general to come to power, end the orchestrated war between the Chinese and the British and grant Carver exclusive broadcast rights in China. Theme song: by Sheryl Crow The one with: The arms dealer’s sale in the Russian mountains Geoffrey Palmer and Judi Dench bickering Dr Kaufmann’s staged suicide of Mrs Carver and discussion with Bond The remote control car chase Bond and Wai Lin using a huge poster of Carver’s face to escape his skyscraper offices and driving a motorbike while handcuffed together

Bond : Pierce Brosnan Villains : Renard Allies : Christmas Jones Valentin Zukovsky M Q R Miss Moneypenny Bill Tanner, MI6 Chief of Staff Charles Robinson, MI6 Deputy Chief of Staff Gadgets: watch with grappling hook and wire, credit card lock pick, glasses with remote gun control, x-ray sunglasses, ski jacket with concealed survival pod Locations: Bilbao, Azjerbaijan, Istanbul Villain’s Plot: Use stolen plutonium to destroy Istanbul and thus obtain a monopoly on oil being supplied from the former Russian states. Theme song: by Garbage The one with: The bombing of MI6 The boat chase down the Thames Q’s departure The !SHOCK! !TWIST! that Elektra King is really a villain M being kidnapped Christmas coming more than once a year

Bond : Pierce Brosnan Villains : Colonel Moon/Gustav Graves Zao Miranda Frost Allies : M Q () Miss Moneypenny Charles Robinson, MI6 Deputy Chief of Staff Gadgets: Invisible car Locations: North Korea, Hong Kong, Cuba, Iceland Villain’s Plot: To use funds earned from the sale of conflict diamonds to create the Icarus satellite and use its capability to harness solar energy to cut a path through the Korean demilitarised zone allowing North Korean forces to invade South Korea. Theme song: The one with: Bad CGI surfing Bond being held captive and dismissed from MI6 as compromised The man with diamonds embedded in his face as a fencing instructor The ice palace The !SHOCK! !TWIST! that Miranda Frost is really a villain

Bond : Villains : Le Chiffre Mr White Allies : Rene Mathis Felix Leiter () M Gadgets: miniature tracking device, microchip monitoring implant, glove compartment defibrilator Locations: Madagascar, The Bahamas, Miami, Montenegro, Venice Villain’s Plot: Le Chiffre aims to recoup lost monies deposited with his money- laundering banking service by a Ugandan warlord through winning a high stakes poker game at Casino Royale. Theme song: by Chris Cornell The one with: No gunbarrel The black and white pre-title The free-running chase on the building site Bond emerging from the sea like a Dairylea triange in budgie-smugglers The stairwell fight Emotions Bond being tortured naked with a knotted rope The !SHOCK! !TWIST! that Vesper Lynd is really a villain The collapsing house in Venice

Bond : Daniel Craig Villains : Dominic Greene Elvis General Medrano Mr White Allies : Camille Montes Rene Mathis Strawberry Fields Felix Leiter M Bill Tanner () Gadgets: none Locations: Siena, Haiti, Austria, Bolivia Villain’s Plot: To control the water supply to Bolivia and charge high rates to the government for doing so. Theme song: Another Way To Die by Jack White and Alicia Keys The one with: The gunbarrel at the end The opening car chase that’s cut very quickly The Palio The Quantum organisation’s meeting at the opera Strawberry Fields’ dead body being covered in crude oil The burning eco-hotel in the desert

Bond : Daniel Craig Villains : Allies : Eve Moneypenny (Naomi Harris) M Q () Bill Tanner Gareth Mallory Severine Kincade Gadgets: signature handprint gun, miniature transmitter Locations: Istanbul, unidentified tropical beach, Shanghai, Macau, London, Scotland Villain’s Plot: Former MI6 agent Silva seeks M’s humiliation, removal as head of MI6 and death as revenge for abandoning him when he was captured by the Chinese in 1997. Theme song: by Adele The one with: No gunbarrel at the start (AGAIN!) Bond being shot and seemingly killed in the pre-titles The bombing of MI6 The Shanghai empty glass skyscraper fight The abandoned island meeting with Silva The rush hour chase through London M reciting poetry Bond’s childhood home The villain succeeding in his plan

Bond : Daniel Craig Villains : Franz Oberhauser/Ernst Stavro Blofeld () Mr Hinx C Allies : Dr Madeleine Swann M () Q Miss Moneypenny Bill Tanner Gadgets: smart blood, watch with timed explosive charge, Locations: Mexico, Rome, Austria, Morocco, London Villain’s Plot: SPECTRE stages terrorist attacks in order to drive governments to join a joint security organisation which will give SPECTRE access to all the governments’ information via corrupt British security chief, C. Theme song: Writing’s On The Wall by Sam Smith The one with: The Day of the Dead Miss Moneypenny visiting Bond’s home The SPECTRE meeting The desert base Bond’s family history revealed The MI6 “Scooby gang” adventures Bond giving up the chance to kill Blofeld