Manhattan Family • April 2015 IMAGINATION

CampSummer GuideApril 2015 manhattan FREE Family Where Every Child Matters Dress up! Stylish fashions for kids

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The debate over charter schools Part one of an exclusive series

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April 2015 • Manhattan Family 3 manhattan Family April 2015

FeatureS ColumNS 8 Trending now 10 FabuLYSS Finds In this stylish city, even kids get a fashion week By lySS STern By Tammy Scileppi 14 Just Write Mom 10 12 Collaborating, not competing By Danielle Sullivan New York’s complicated and sticky debate over charter schools 17 Parents Helping Parents By Tammy Scileppi By SHaron c. peTerS 16 Party in the park 32 Ask an Attorney Creative ideas for planning an outdoor celebration By aliSon arDen BeSunDer, eSq. By DeniSe yearian 34 Dear Dr. Karyn 18 Camp empowered By Dr. karyn gorDon How to help your child achieve self- determination this summer 36 Behavior & Beyond By Dr. marcie Beigel By Dr. HeiDi SmiTH lueDTke 25 Sunny skies 46 Good Sense Eating By cHriSTine m. palumBo, rD Safe, happy air travel with kids 25 By malia JacoBSon 26 Beware the Nanny Tax CaleNdar How to protect yourself and your caregiver by 38 April Events following the law at tax time By SHnieka l. JoHnSon SPeCial SeCtioNS 28 Time to visit Toronto Ontario’s diverse capital city offers lots of 20 Camp Directory family fun 45 Party Planners By SHnieka l. JoHnSon 45 The Marketplace 30 Star with a cause Young actress puts spotlight on hungry kids By SHnieka l. JoHnSon 33 Hoarding memories Cleaning the garage leads to a trip down memory lane By paTrick Hempfing 37 No laughing matter 36 Kid critic reviews docu-drama about bullying 4 Manhattan FaMily • April 2015 IMAGINATION. INSPIRATION. INNOVATION. THE FOUNDATIONS OF THE STEINER COMMUNITY

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April 2015 • Manhattan Family 5 letter from the PublIsher

Starting the discussion on gender

’ve been thinking one as I recall. He was that this lovely woman used to be out. Fortunately, like many of the a lot about gender an enigma. It made me that very shy and repressed boy other topics in today’s more trans- I and the very new sad and I purposely who sat next to me in class and in parent world, this issue is being issues that the idea of went out of my way the choir. She then went on to tell addressed with greater sensitivity gender is raising lately. every day to give him me that it took her many unhappy and intelligence. I don’t think I ever con- a greeting waiting for years to realize, accept and then Parenting is the most important sidered it before the the day when he would act on the fact that she was in the thing anyone will ever do. It de- last few months, but open up. He never did. wrong body. She also thanked me mands great patience, skill and suddenly one is hear- Some years later, for having been kind to her. She adaptability and the willingness ing about gender neu- I was shopping at a said I was the only one. to reach out for help when help is trality and I’m find- major department store There have been numerous ar- needed. ing it fascinating. There are forms and a rather elegantly dressed and ticles written lately and TV pro- Thanks for reading. Have a great available now where a third gender beautiful woman asked me if I had grams about experiences like this month. It’s almost spring possibility is optional, neutral. gone to such and such a school. and many parents are being ad- I recall back when I was in school I said yes and she told me she vised to take seriously the issues that there was a boy who sat next was a former classmate of mine. of gender identity confusion or to me who was a rather odd char- I couldn’t imagine who she could questioning and seek professional acter. He was without friends and be because she looked like no one counseling. In this issue there is a seemed to actually lack an appar- I had ever known before. She said letter posed to our columnist Sha- ent personality. Every day I said she wasn’t at all surprised that I ron Peters from a concerned parent hello to him although he would didn’t recognized her because she whose child is professing to be a Susan Weiss-Voskidis, only nod in response. He was be- was very changed from the way different sex. She is unprepared for Publisher/Excutive Editor yond shy, and never spoke to any- she looked in school. It turned out this reality and wisely is reaching [email protected]

Community News Group Contact Information ceo: Les Goodstein advertising: Web or Print address President & Publisher: Jennifer Goodstein (718) 2604554 New York Parenting Media/CNG [email protected] or 1 Metrotech Center North New York Parenting [email protected] 10th Floor circulation Brooklyn, NY 11201 Publisher / executive editor: (718) 2608336 Susan Weiss [email protected] Publisher / business Manager: www.NYParenting.com Clifford Luster editorial (718) 2604554 oPerations associate: Tina Felicetti [email protected] sales rePs: Alexis Benson, Erin Brof, calendar Jay Pelc, Stephanie Stellacio, Shanika Stewart (718) 2602523 art director: Leah Mitch

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April 2015 • Manhattan Family 7 All photos by Anna Kseznenko (Left and center) Cozy looks for girls and boys at the Anais & I show. (Above) New Jersey-based designer LaToia Fitzgerald of all-boy brand Dillonger with her son Dillon. Trending now By Tammy Scileppi Rising designer Alia Charvel at dozens of stores all over the city In this stylish opened the Showcase with the debut (www.imogacollection.com). ew York City’s tweens and of her Little Miss Galia collection in All-boy brand Dillonger’s New Jer- city, even teens, and even their little the American market. The Mexican sey-based designer LaToia Fitzger- N sisters and brothers, seem brand interprets fashion trends with ald and her son Dillon accompanied to have a built-in sense of street- colorful cultural elements and past Chung at the finale walk. Young city kids get a smart style. traditions through lovely fabrics and dudes really dig the edgy style that That fashion savvy reverberated patterns (littlemissgalia.com). makes her clothes stand out in a down the runway in February, as And designer Jane D’ Haene de- crowd. fashion week spirited young models rocked a slew buted her collection with a fun kick- This time around, Manhattan- of cool designer threads during pe- off that took place at a local school based designer and mom Bonnie titePARADE’s popular bi-annual city park. Kids modeled her clothes while Young emphasized fun geometric event, Kids Fashion Week. playing hop scotch and volleyball. shapes and showed off her signature Spring beckons, but those warm, During the grand finale, Man- dramatic style on the runway. bright, a nd st ylish he ad - tur ning look s hattan-based designer HJ Chung Here and there sparkly party and have been the talk of the town since of Imoga (a petitePARADE alumni holiday pieces emerged, and a lus- they were featured at the fall–winter brand) walked the runway with her cious blue velvet jacket was a hit 2015 Showcase, held at historic Bath- teen daughter, who wore a fabulous with onlookers. house Studios in Manhattan’s East wintry jacket that her mom designed. Short, retro black leather jackets Village. Several unique toddler-to- Crafting pint-size silhouettes that looked hip on the runway; girls wore teen collections got plenty of oohs maximize style and freedom, Imoga them with flare skirts, tights and leg and aahs from invited guests and is all about timeless and whimsical, warmers, reminiscent of the ’80s. families eager to get a sneak peek at fun-to-wear clothing, and Chung’s And there was lots of big hair. what the younger set will be wearing designs keep little souls delighted all An exotic flower motif adorned in the coming months. year long. You can find her creations a stunning party dress by Anais &

8 Manhattan Family • April 2015 (Above) Manhattan-based designer HJ Chung of Imoga walked the runway with her daughters, who wore fabulous fur jackets during the grand finale. (Left) This Little Miss Galia design has a throwback vibe.

I — a simple, geometric pumpkin My own impressions: Bonnie sheath had that unmistakable ’60s Young’s classy and dressy white col- look. Oh, and your daughter will lared black dress with white cuffs

All photos by Anna Kseznenko probably want to check out the looked a lot like a piece that my (Left and center) Cozy looks for girls and boys at the newest version of a ’70s shirt cousin wore to a birthday party back Anais & I show. (Above) New Jersey-based designer dress for fall. You can take a cue in the ’70s (I found an old pic). And LaToia Fitzgerald of all-boy brand Dillonger with her from petitePARADE designers one short red jacket with a wide and show her how she can cre- collar looked like a really cool, very son Dillon. ate a great outfit by wearing updated version of a gray ’90s jacket a soft sweater (even a cotton that’s still hanging in my friend’s one) under an edgy, zipper- closet. Overall, the runway vibe accented textured vest. She seemed to range from sophisticated can complete this look with a chic to slightly lil’ rebel for the young pretty skirt or dark leggings. set, while the wow factor was amped News flash! This fall, colorful up for tweens and teens. large-print flowers will be pop- If you want to get an idea of what ping up amidst those basic blacks your kids’, tweens’ and teens’ closets Trending now and darker hues. And traditional might look like this coming fall and prints and plaids — which were all winter, check out these awesome By Tammy Scileppi Rising designer Alia Charvel at dozens of stores all over the city the rage on the runway — got an collections at: www.petiteparade. In this stylish opened the Showcase with the debut (www.imogacollection.com). unexpected twist. Look for fabu- com/8th-edition/ ew York City’s tweens and of her Little Miss Galia collection in All-boy brand Dillonger’s New Jer- lously mismatched prints as well, Without a doubt, the newest kids’ city, even teens, and even their little the American market. The Mexican sey-based designer LaToia Fitzger- and muted tones juxtaposed against looks are kind of edgy and electric in N sisters and brothers, seem brand interprets fashion trends with ald and her son Dillon accompanied shiny fabrics. If you’re thinking, any- a fun and funky way. For show high- to have a built-in sense of street- colorful cultural elements and past Chung at the finale walk. Young city thing goes! You’re right. lights, you and your kids can go to: kids get a smart style. traditions through lovely fabrics and dudes really dig the edgy style that Rumor has it that Gotham’s trendy https://instagram.com/petiteparade. That fashion savvy reverberated patterns (littlemissgalia.com). makes her clothes stand out in a young ladies and gents will have a And for a behind-the-scenes peek down the runway in February, as And designer Jane D’ Haene de- crowd. lot of great looks to choose from at the recent event, visit: www.you- fashion week spirited young models rocked a slew buted her collection with a fun kick- This time around, Manhattan- in the fall. And budget-conscious tube.com/watch?v=YhBHov7sNKo. of cool designer threads during pe- off that took place at a local school based designer and mom Bonnie moms and dads shouldn’t worry, With more than 100 designers and titePARADE’s popular bi-annual city park. Kids modeled her clothes while Young emphasized fun geometric because there are so many options 10,000 guests, petitePARADE contin- event, Kids Fashion Week. playing hop scotch and volleyball. shapes and showed off her signature out there for every wallet, and in ues to attract media, parents, and Spring beckons, but those warm, During the grand finale, Man- dramatic style on the runway. the coming months you and your the children’s industry, but philan- bright, a nd st ylish he ad - tur ning look s hattan-based designer HJ Chung Here and there sparkly party and kids and teens will be finding runway thropy has always played a vital role. have been the talk of the town since of Imoga (a petitePARADE alumni holiday pieces emerged, and a lus- styles at many local retailers. Each season, it partners with out- they were featured at the fall–winter brand) walked the runway with her cious blue velvet jacket was a hit More than ever before kids design- standing organizations, such as Only 2015 Showcase, held at historic Bath- teen daughter, who wore a fabulous with onlookers. ers are saying: cute but not cutesy, Make Believe, Free Arts NYC, New house Studios in Manhattan’s East wintry jacket that her mom designed. Short, retro black leather jackets sophisticated yet whimsical, basic but York Foundling, K.I.D.S./Fashion De- Village. Several unique toddler-to- Crafting pint-size silhouettes that looked hip on the runway; girls wore not mediocre, comfy but always styl- livers, and The Juice Foundation to teen collections got plenty of oohs maximize style and freedom, Imoga them with flare skirts, tights and leg ish. Look around you. Long gone are raise money and awareness and pro- and aahs from invited guests and is all about timeless and whimsical, warmers, reminiscent of the ’80s. the days of cookie cutter childrens- vide the families in attendance with families eager to get a sneak peek at fun-to-wear clothing, and Chung’s And there was lots of big hair. wear — even for babies. Savvy design- fun, interactive workshops which ex- what the younger set will be wearing designs keep little souls delighted all An exotic flower motif adorned ers are breaking all the rules while pose children to the importance of in the coming months. year long. You can find her creations a stunning party dress by Anais & holding on to that innocence factor. giving back. April 2015 • Manhattan Family 9 WOMEN Easter ideas & other seasonal activities ooks like we can officially to skip, hop, slide, and run outdoors. Color code the eggs you hide ac- put those puffy jackets, hats, I know the parents are equally as ex- cording to age so that means the litt- L gloves, mittens, and snow cited to have the kids playing outside, lies, or the 2- to 4-year-olds, can hunt boots away! Spring fever has sprung! I especially with the extra hour of sun for blue eggs, while the older kids go FABULYSS can’t remember the last time I saw so we now receive each day. for purple. Or have the boys hunt for many children happy just from being Moms on the Upper East Side, blue and the girls hunt for pink. FINDS outside. So many young children make sure you book a ride at the Easter egg hunt fun idea #2: Add LYSS STERN were cooped up this winter for way new E. 60th Street Flywheel, www. letters to each egg so kids can make too long. The parks are in full bloom flywheelsports.com. You will want to words. and the kids have never been happier make sure you’re bathing suit ready Buy some alphabet stickers or for summer, which is right around write a different letter on the outside the corner. In all honesty, as much as of each egg. You can even get crafty this exercise is great for our physical enough to paint letters on each egg. being, for me it’s so much more for my Set the kids loose on their egg mental state of mind. It’s my 45 min- hunt and then offer extra Easter utes of Mommy Time Out, when I can prizes to the kid who makes the lon- escape in my own head to the music gest word from his egg stash. and just let go. As busy city parents, Easter egg hunt fun idea #3: sometimes we need to just let it go, Leave telltale bunny prints. the words right out of Elsa’s mouth. Make bunny footprints near each If you are going away for spring hidden Easter egg to give the kids break, have a #FabULyss time spend- some easy hints as to where the eggs ing quality time with your family and are hidden. don’t forget to power down. If you You can also try making the foot- are here in New York taking a stayca- prints out of plain paper or even tion, there are so many wonderful sprinkle some baby powder and put activities to do with your family. a bunny paw print in it with your Easter and Passover are also a fingers. great time to spend quality family time Easter egg hunt fun idea #4: Hide with your loved ones. I will be making them in the house. chocolate-covered matzah with my Make a trail of little eggs from boys. I especially love this toffee-cov- your child’s bedroom to the living ered chocolate matzah recipe from area, and then lead them to one giant Martha Stewart (recipe below). clue that will allow them to discover How much fun is an Easter Egg either a larger egg or a non-chocolate hunt? Make yours creative and have Easter gift such as a book or toy. lots of fun with the family. Most importantly, have a #FabUL- Easter egg hunt fun idea #1: Use ysslyFun time! different colored eggs by age. Also this month, don’t miss #Di- vaMomsBookClub’s night out with New York Times best-selling author Kimberly McCreight, author of “Re- Handmade toffee-chocolate matzah constructing Amelia.” Celebrate her INGREDIENTS: even layer on baking sheet and set Remove from oven and sprinkle with newest book release, “Where They 4 sheets unsalted non-egg matzah aside. Melt butter in a saucepan over chocolate chips. Tent matzah with Found Her.” 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, cut medium-low heat. Add brown sugar aluminum foil and let stand 20 to 30 Kimberly McCreight book signing and into small pieces and immediately reduce temperature minutes. Remove foil tent and spread Q and A at New York Design Center (200 Lexington Ave. between E. 32nd and 1 cup packed dark-brown sugar to low. Cook, stirring, adjusting melted chocolate over matzah to heat as necessary, until sugar has cover; sprinkle with sea salt. Transfer E. 33rd streets in Kips Bay, Manhattan, 1 (12-ounce) package semisweet completely dissolved and begins to matzah to refrigerator and let chill at divamoms.com) April 13, 6:30–8:30 pm. chocolate chips (2 cups) bubble. Drizzle toffee over matzah least two hours. Break chilled matzah Free. Be one of the first 75 moms to sign Coarse sea salt and spread to cover using a spatula. into pieces. Matzah will keep in an up and you will automatically be entered DIRECTIONS: Preheat oven to 250 Transfer toffee-covered matzah to airtight container for up to four days to win a $1000 gift certificate to Duc Duc. degrees. Line a baking sheet with oven and bake until toffee has a at room temperature. [email protected]. parchment paper. Place matzah in an rich, shiny sheen, 10 to 20 minutes. From Martha Stewart Living Lyss Stern is the founder of DivaLyss- cious Moms (www.divamoms.com).

10 Manhattan Family • April 2015 WOMEN 1871: The Fisk Jubilee Singers SAVE introduce spirituals DON’T WAIT FOR THE ** presents $ to the masses 100 WHEN YOU REPORT CARD. CALL TODAY! GET HELP NOW. Easter ideas & other For almost 40 years, Huntington’s highly trained tutors have worked one-to-one with students to help them master the skills needed to

make their next report card better than the last one. ACADEMIC SKILLS K-12 Reading • Writing • Math • Study Skills • Spelling seasonal activities Vocabulary • Phonics ooks like we can officially to skip, hop, slide, and run outdoors. Color code the eggs you hide ac- SUBJECT TUTORING MIDDLE SCHOOL-COLLEGE put those puffy jackets, hats, I know the parents are equally as ex- cording to age so that means the litt- Algebra • Geometry • Trigonometry • Pre-Calculus • Calculus L gloves, mittens, and snow cited to have the kids playing outside, lies, or the 2- to 4-year-olds, can hunt Earth Science • Biology • Chemistry • Physics boots away! Spring fever has sprung! I especially with the extra hour of sun for blue eggs, while the older kids go EXAM PREP SAT • PSAT/NMSQT • ACT FABULYSS can’t remember the last time I saw so we now receive each day. for purple. Or have the boys hunt for Advanced Placement (AP)* • State Tests • GED • ASVAB • ISEE FINDS many children happy just from being Moms on the Upper East Side, blue and the girls hunt for pink. SSAT • SHSAT • ELA • Regents • TACHS • CHSEE outside. So many young children make sure you book a ride at the Easter egg hunt fun idea #2: Add Huntington is accredited by Middle States Association of Colleges and Schools LYSS STERN were cooped up this winter for way new E. 60th Street Flywheel, www. letters to each egg so kids can make (MSA). To ﬁnd out more about Huntington Tutoring Programs, CALL NOW! too long. The parks are in full bloom flywheelsports.com. You will want to words. Bay Ridge Bronx Flushing and the kids have never been happier make sure you’re bathing suit ready By Buy some alphabet stickers or 718-491-0900 718-597-1500 718-358-7900 for summer, which is right around write a different letter on the outside Featuring the corner. In all honesty, as much as of each egg. You can even get crafty "This Little Light of Mine" Myla Churchill Manhattan Park Slope Staten Island this exercise is great for our physical enough to paint letters on each egg. Directed by 212-362-0100 718-230-4600 718-697-0500 being, for me it’s so much more for my Set the kids loose on their egg Colman Domingo mental state of mind. It’s my 45 min- hunt and then offer extra Easter For additional locations in your area call Based on the book “A Band of Angels” by Deborah Hopkinson ® utes of Mommy Time Out, when I can prizes to the kid who makes the lon- Ages 8 to Adult 1 800 CAN LEARN escape in my own head to the music gest word from his egg stash. HuntingtonHelps.com and just let go. As busy city parents, Easter egg hunt fun idea #3: April 25th – May 1010th, 2015 ©2015 Huntington Mark, LLC. Independently Owned and Operated. *SAT and Advanced Placement (AP) are registered trademarks of the College Board. PSAT/NMSQT is a registered trademark of the College Board and the National Merit Scholarship Corporation. ACT is a registered trademark of ACT, Inc. None of sometimes we need to just let it go, Leave telltale bunny prints. Theater 3 311 W. 43rd St., 3rd Fl. these entities were involved in the production of, and do not enclose the program. ** Offer valid for Academic Evaluation or Tuition, new students only. Not valid the words right out of Elsa’s mouth. Make bunny footprints near each nycchildrenstheater.org with any other offer. HPA101-NYWmanfam(3/15) If you are going away for spring hidden Easter egg to give the kids break, have a #FabULyss time spend- some easy hints as to where the eggs ing quality time with your family and are hidden. don’t forget to power down. If you You can also try making the foot- are here in New York taking a stayca- prints out of plain paper or even tion, there are so many wonderful sprinkle some baby powder and put activities to do with your family. a bunny paw print in it with your The School Easter and Passover are also a fingers. of great time to spend quality family time Easter egg hunt fun idea #4: Hide with your loved ones. I will be making them in the house. American Ballet chocolate-covered matzah with my Make a trail of little eggs from boys. I especially love this toffee-cov- your child’s bedroom to the living ered chocolate matzah recipe from area, and then lead them to one giant Martha Stewart (recipe below). clue that will allow them to discover How much fun is an Easter Egg either a larger egg or a non-chocolate THE OFFICIAL SCHOOL hunt? Make yours creative and have Easter gift such as a book or toy. OF NEW YORK CITY BALLET lots of fun with the family. Most importantly, have a #FabUL-

Easter egg hunt fun idea #1: Use ysslyFun time! Photos by Rosalie O’Connor different colored eggs by age. Also this month, don’t miss #Di- vaMomsBookClub’s night out with RING New York Times best-selling author 15 SP AUDIT Kimberly McCreight, author of “Re- 20 IONS Handmade toffee-chocolate matzah constructing Amelia.” Celebrate her AUDITION DATES AT SAB for 6 to 10 r olds INGREDIENTS: even layer on baking sheet and set Remove from oven and sprinkle with newest book release, “Where They yea 4 sheets unsalted non-egg matzah aside. Melt butter in a saucepan over chocolate chips. Tent matzah with Found Her.” April 2 7 7 & 8 year olds medium-low heat. Add brown sugar aluminum foil and let stand 20 to 30 Kimberly McCreight book signing and no experience necessary 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, cut April 28 9 & 10 year olds SAB will also hold free auditions in Chinatown on April into small pieces and immediately reduce temperature minutes. Remove foil tent and spread Q and A at New York Design Center (200 tuition assistance is available 16 and Harlem on April 24. For more information about to low. Cook, stirring, adjusting melted chocolate over matzah to Lexington Ave. between E. 32nd and 1 cup packed dark-brown sugar May 1 6 year olds (date full) There is a $35 audition fee for heat as necessary, until sugar has cover; sprinkle with sea salt. Transfer E. 33rd streets in Kips Bay, Manhattan, our Community Auditions, visit sab.org/auditions. 1 (12-ounce) package semisweet 6 year olds (date added) all auditions at SAB completely dissolved and begins to matzah to refrigerator and let chill at divamoms.com) April 13, 6:30–8:30 pm. May 4 chocolate chips (2 cups) bubble. Drizzle toffee over matzah least two hours. Break chilled matzah Free. Be one of the first 75 moms to sign 2015-2016 Winter Term classes begin in September for 8 to 10 year Coarse sea salt and spread to cover using a spatula. into pieces. Matzah will keep in an up and you will automatically be entered Auditions begin at 4pm on each date. Applicants must visit sab.org/auditions olds and in October for 6 and 7 year olds. l Children must be 6 years DIRECTIONS: Preheat oven to 250 Transfer toffee-covered matzah to airtight container for up to four days to win a $1000 gift certificate to Duc Duc. in advance of the audition date to register and schedule an audition time. old by 9/1/15 to audition and enroll for the 2015-2016 Winter Term. degrees. Line a baking sheet with oven and bake until toffee has a at room temperature. [email protected]. parchment paper. Place matzah in an rich, shiny sheen, 10 to 20 minutes. From Martha Stewart Living Lyss Stern is the founder of DivaLyss- Founders: George Balanchine and Lincoln Kirstein Chairman of Faculty and Artistic Director: Peter Martins 70 Lincoln Center Plaza, New York, NY 10023 | www.sab.org cious Moms (www.divamoms.com).

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 11 Collaborating, not competing

12 Manhattan Family • April 2015 PubliC SC hool Charterhool Collaborating, SC not competing

By Tammy Scileppi Brooklyn resident Renee Dinnerstein, New York’s NY’s Charter has been doing consulting work at he ongoing clash between sChools a public school on the Lower East complicated New York City’s diverse tra- Side that shares space with a charter. T ditional district schools and part 1 of a series She said the public school “serves charters seems to resemble a World incredibly needy children — children and sticky Wrestling Federation Superstars may take about five-plus years to in shelters, foster homes, abusive competition at times. And the con- reach proficiency. homes, and they also have a very fusing myths and media distractions Opinions are mixed and emotions large special education population.” debate over swirling around this hot-button de- run high on both sides of the charter Dinnerstein feels that “our democ- bate can make your head spin, espe- school movement issue, while politi- racy should be putting money into charter cially if you’re a parent. cally driven battles over space, fund- public education to make it better, So, what are charter schools? ing, and quality of education seem to not using funds that they need to pay These publicly funded hybrids add fuel to the fire and hinder much- for charter schools,” and she points schools are a vital part of the city’s sprawl- needed collaboration. out that “Special ed is very tricky — a ing public education system, where The biggest issues about charter child who needs speech therapy, or there’s no shortage of structural and schools generally are: who is dyslexic, can be considered cultural differences. Independently co-location special ed. Then there are children managed, charters are actually free Some parents argue that pub- with behavior disorders, who are public schools that are open to all lic schools lose space to fit charter very violent, and these children are New York City children. That in- schools into public school buildings. also special education children.” cludes English Language Learners But it turns out the issue may really Dinnerstein, whose grandson has know that the people who run char- Heights, and Williamsburg. and special needs kids, as well. not be that big of a deal. Did you know always attended Brooklyn public ters are saying that it’s public educa- Uncommon Schools CEO Brett There are 197 charter schools that (according to charternyc.org) the schools, believes that “the charter tion. Not so. Absolutely not so,” she Opinions are mixed and emotions run high on Peiser said they are incredibly for- here: Eighty-two in Brooklyn, 52 in Department of Education has been school skims off children who are said. “Think about all of the money both sides of the charter school movement issue, tunate to have had so many great the Bronx, 46 in Manhattan, 14 in co-locating public schools for nearly the highest-achieving students, or that they have for their advertising minds united at their Collaboration Queens, and three on Staten Island. 100 years, and that surprisingly, char- at least who come from the most campaign. Think about closing all of while politically driven battles over space, funding, Day event, including Schools Chancel- And the approximately 83,200 stu- ters are only involved in eight percent involved families. If they take special the schools for a political jaunt to Al- lor Fariña, and more than 170 educa- dents who attend charters come from of all co-locations citywide? ed students (which they tend not to) bany. We should be putting all of our and quality of education seem to add fuel to the tors from 14 district partner schools. all backgrounds and ethnicities. Outperforming public schools they absolutely don’t take the chil- energy and funds into creating the “It is exciting to collaborate with Charter schools have gotten a bad Charter schools are thought to dren with behavior issues. Then the best public education possible.” fire and hinder much-needed collaboration. such talented, committed educators rap recently for not being inclusive outperform public schools test-wise. public school is left with the most Dinnerstein’s blog, “Investigating working in the same communities as enough, yet it appears they have The big picture seems to indicate needy children. Because they are Choice Time: Inquiry, Exploration, we do each day. We get better as edu- taken the lead in and have done a that charter schools are infact out- losing more and more population and Play,” www.investigatingchoice- tion with (and from) charters, during Schools, www.uncommonschools. cators when we collaborate closely good job educating special educa- performing peer district schools, but to the charter school, they are los- time.com, is a place where she writes a professional development day for org, serve more than 5,900 kinder- and learn from one another in order tion students and English Language it appears that the quality of char- ing more and more money and have about inquiry-based choice time, district teachers and principals, held garten through 12th grade students, to keep making a meaningful impact Learners, while making solid prog- ters across the board isn’t the same: less money for the children in their and advocates for developmentally at an Uncommon Charter School in including both single-sex and co-ed in the lives of our students – and that ress in recruiting more of these kids some have high records of achieve- school, who need special services.” appropriate instruction for children Brooklyn. She said that the future of schools. According to its site, the is what we are all doing each and into their schools, according to the ment, while others aren’t as strong. And in her opinion, “Parents are in grades pre-K through third. She the city depends on how all kids do, main goal is to prepare students every day.” New York City Charter School Cen- money and funding attracted to the charter school be- is also writing a book on inquiry- no matter what kind of school they to enter, succeed in, and graduate After weighing the pros and cons of ter, www.nyccharterschools.org. Charter schools have been de- cause it has all-new material, car- based choice time, scheduled to be come from. And it appears she’s in- from college. Students are randomly charters vs. traditional district schools, In fact, according to that site, it scribed as “laboratories of innova- peted classrooms, two teachers in published by Heinemann in the fall terested in finding ways for schools selected by public lottery in grades interested parents should research, call, seems English Language Learners tion” by some and “a drain on public a classroom, and longer days. They of 2016. to share space and resources more kindergarten and fifth, and waiting interview staff, and visit charter schools attending charters become profi- schools” by others. don’t understand that the instruc- Indeed, finding a peaceful solution effectively, according to a recent cap- lists are kept through grade eight. in their area to decide which is the best cient in English more quickly than in • • • tion is basically test prep all year. isn’t easy, but there’s hope. italnewyork.com article. It currently has schools in Bedford- fit for their child(ren). For more info. you public schools citywide, where it ap- For the past six years, early child- “Basically, the charter movement In February, Schools Chancellor With 21 charters in Brooklyn, Stuyvesant, Brownsville, Crown can visit: www.uncommonschools.org/ pears that many immigrant students hood education expert and longtime is a drive to privatize education. I Carmen Fariña called for collabora- Uncommon New York City Charter Heights, East Flatbush, Prospect our-schools/all-charter-schools-by-city.

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 13 PARENTING

PARENTING MEDIA ASSOCIATION 2015 Bronze Award Winner Remembering Lily Editorial Awards Competition It’s not easy to say ‘goodbye’ to a beloved pet

bout a week ago, our old- uled for Monday morning. But on knew we had to let her go. est cat, Lily, stopped eating Friday night, she looked listless and I have said before that Dr. Beverly A out of the blue. She began was projectile vomiting. Dr. Beverly is outstanding, but he was even be- vomiting a bit and quickly appeared said to bring her in at any time if she yond that on Saturday. I don’t think dehydrated. She had become very became any worse, and I did just I would have been able to make that JUST WRITE skinny over the past few months, that on Saturday morning. I was sure decision if it wasn’t for his medi- but I chalked that up to age, because she needed fluids and, honestly, I cal expertise and compassionate, MOM she was still so friendly, happy, and was afraid to keep her at home. thoughtful words. DANIELLE SULLIVAN lively. However, one day she was Dr. Beverly agreed she should be I also would never have been able rubbing up on the kitchen chair and hospitalized, because she needed to do it without my daughter there. chomping down on a bite of pizza IV fluids and had a heart murmur, She was my rock. We cuddled and with the kids, and yet, just a few days but since the practice is closed on talked to Lily for hours that day while later, she was vomiting and parched. Sundays, he quickly set us up with waiting, and then a little while after I took her to our vet, Dr. Jeff Beverly, an emergency care hospital where we made the decision, we kissed her at Marine Park Vet Group in Brook- they could also perform an immedi- sweet head and said “goodbye.” lyn on Wednesday. ate ultrasound. In less than an hour, Now, even though I know it was Initial blood tests ruled out a few Lily was being triaged at the 24-hour the right thing to do, we are all still suspected diseases, like thyroid is- facility. so very sad. We miss petting her, sues and kidney failure. She was A nice vet that I had never met feeding her, and even talking to her. given fluids for dehydration and the before quickly proceeded to give I always say “hi” to our pets every next step was an ultrasound sched- Lily and exam and an ultrasound, morning, and it feels strange to leave and then informed us that Lily has Lily’s name out of the loop. intestinal cancer. There was a large But I also feel slightly relieved, be- tumor in her intestine, which is why cause I don’t see her looking incred- she could not keep anything down. ibly weary and trying so hard to get Then she said we could put her her to eat when it was the last thing down that day. she wanted to do. When I heard that, I pretty much I want to remember her the way lost my train of any rational thought. she looked when she was healthy, a I was just told Lily had cancer and bright-eyed, loving, happy cat. The needed to be put down all within photo here really shows the true Lily, 30 seconds. My brain was spinning, and that’s the way I’d like to remem- and as the vet calmly and sympa- ber her. It is never easy to say “good- thetically explained why Lily was not bye” to a beloved pet, but hopefully, going to recover from this, I couldn’t the memories of the good years out- wrap my head around it all. weigh the suffering at the end. Lily My oldest daughter, Amanda, was had a wonderful and happy life, and with me, thank goodness, and she that’s what I try to keep reminding asked if we could talk to Dr. Beverly myself every time I miss her. before we made any decisions. The As I was finishing up this piece, I doctor said she’d call him to fill him checked the mail and found a condo- in, and then we could call and speak lence card from the vet’s office, and with him. Just a few minutes later, the text is on target: “Some friends she came back in the room and said come into our lives and quickly go. he was coming right over. Some stay for a while, leave paw I asked Dr. Beverly so many ques- prints on our hearts, and we are tions, but they all really boiled down never, ever the same.” to “what should we do?” We’ll always have Lily’s paw print, I didn’t want Lily to suffer, but I and we are definitely all the better didn’t want to lose her, either. When for it. he said that we could certainly take Danielle Sullivan, a mom of three, her home and bring her back when has worked as a writer and editor in we reconciled ourselves with the the parenting world for more than 10 poor prognosis, I took one look at years. Sullivan also writes about pets beautiful Lily being cradled in my and parenting for Disney’s Babble.com. daughter’s arms, her lethargic look, Find Sullivan on her blogs, Just Write Lily is remembered after losing her life to intestinal cancer. and her obvious dehydration, and I Mom and Some Puppy To Love. 14 Manhattan Family • April 2015 PARENTING

PARENTING MEDIA ASSOCIATION KAUFMAN CHILDREN’S 2015 Bronze Award Winner Remembering Lily DENTAL HOSPITAL Harlem Hebrew is a tuition-free dual-language public charter school focusing on an Editorial Awards Harlem Hebrewimmersion approachis a tuition-free to Modern Israeli dual-language Hebrew and the studypublic of Israeli charter culture school and history. focusing on an Competition As with all public schools, we are non-sectarian and do not teach religion. All are welcome! immersion approach to Modern Israeli Hebrew and the study of Israeli culture and history. It’s not easy to say ‘goodbye’ to a beloved pet We have two-three teachers in a classroom throughout the day and provide our students As with all publicwith outstanding schools, instruction we are across non-sectarian all curriculum areas. and Modeleddo not after teach the Teachersreligion. College All are welcome! • Board Certified Pediatric Dentists, Orthodontists, and bout a week ago, our old- uled for Monday morning. But on knew we had to let her go. Reader’s and Writer’s Workshop, our curriculum is individualized, Anesthesiologists We have two-three teachersdifferentiated in a classroom and designed tothroughout meet individual the needs. day and provide our students est cat, Lily, stopped eating Friday night, she looked listless and I have said before that Dr. Beverly with outstanding instruction across all curriculum areas. Modeled after the Teachers College out of the blue. She began was projectile vomiting. Dr. Beverly is outstanding, but he was even be- • Affordable, safe, and gentle dental care for infants, Applications for the 2015-16 school year are currently being accepted. A Reader’sWe have and limited Writer’s spaces availableWorkshop, in grades our K, 1curriculum and 2 for this schoolis individualized, year. vomiting a bit and quickly appeared said to bring her in at any time if she yond that on Saturday. I don’t think children, and adolescents by specialists dehydrated. She had become very became any worse, and I did just I would have been able to make that Toursdifferentiated are available on Tuesdays and designed by appointment to meet only. Call individual us at 212-866-4608. needs. • Laughing gas and general anesthesia available JUST WRITE skinny over the past few months, that on Saturday morning. I was sure decision if it wasn’t for his medi- but I chalked that up to age, because she needed fluids and, honestly, I cal expertise and compassionate, • Convenient hours, and many insurances accepted Applications for the 2015-16 school year are currently being accepted. MOM she was still so friendly, happy, and was afraid to keep her at home. thoughtful words. We have limited spaces available in grades K, 1 and 2 for this school year. DANIELLE SULLIVAN lively. However, one day she was Dr. Beverly agreed she should be I also would never have been able Tours are available on Tuesdays by appointment only. Call us at 212-866-4608. rubbing up on the kitchen chair and hospitalized, because she needed to do it without my daughter there. chomping down on a bite of pizza IV fluids and had a heart murmur, She was my rock. We cuddled and with the kids, and yet, just a few days but since the practice is closed on talked to Lily for hours that day while later, she was vomiting and parched. Sundays, he quickly set us up with waiting, and then a little while after I took her to our vet, Dr. Jeff Beverly, an emergency care hospital where we made the decision, we kissed her at Marine Park Vet Group in Brook- they could also perform an immedi- sweet head and said “goodbye.” 103 St. Mark's Place, Manhattan lyn on Wednesday. ate ultrasound. In less than an hour, Now, even though I know it was (212) 432-5234 Our 2015-16 student lottery will be held at 5pm, at the school, on Thursday April 16th. Initial blood tests ruled out a few Lily was being triaged at the 24-hour the right thing to do, we are all still Send in your application, post marked no later than April 1st, to be included in the lottery! suspected diseases, like thyroid is- facility. so very sad. We miss petting her, www.kcdh.org www.harlemhebrewcharter.org sues and kidney failure. She was A nice vet that I had never met feeding her, and even talking to her. 2120 Ocean Avenue, Brooklyn 147 St. Nicholas Avenue, New York, NY 10026 given fluids for dehydration and the before quickly proceeded to give I always say “hi” to our pets every Hablamos (212) 866-4608 • [email protected] next step was an ultrasound sched- Lily and exam and an ultrasound, morning, and it feels strange to leave (718) 645-1588 Español! and then informed us that Lily has Lily’s name out of the loop. 1/15NYPED1/4 intestinal cancer. There was a large But I also feel slightly relieved, be- tumor in her intestine, which is why cause I don’t see her looking incred- she could not keep anything down. ibly weary and trying so hard to get Our 2015-16 student lottery will be held at 5pm, at the school, on Thursday April 16th. Then she said we could put her her to eat when it was the last thing Send in your application, post marked no later than April 1st, to be included in the lottery! down that day. she wanted to do. When I heard that, I pretty much I want to remember her the way lost my train of any rational thought. she looked when she was healthy, a www.harlemhebrewcharter.org I was just told Lily had cancer and bright-eyed, loving, happy cat. The 147 St. Nicholas Avenue, New York, NY 10026 needed to be put down all within photo here really shows the true Lily, 620 Isham Street New York, NY 10034 212.567.5800(212) 866-4608 • [email protected] 30 seconds. My brain was spinning, and that’s the way I’d like to remem- and as the vet calmly and sympa- ber her. It is never easy to say “good- Good Shepherd School, a Pre-K3 to 8th grade elementary complete with a competitive and selective Early Childhood Education Program thetically explained why Lily was not bye” to a beloved pet, but hopefully, taught in a modern and nurturing setting by experienced and credentialed professionals. going to recover from this, I couldn’t the memories of the good years out- wrap my head around it all. weigh the suffering at the end. Lily • Our early drop-program which includes breakfast allows • We offer two Regents track courses for High School credit: My oldest daughter, Amanda, was had a wonderful and happy life, and parents to drop off children at 7:00am and after-school Earth Science and Integrated Algebra. with me, thank goodness, and she that’s what I try to keep reminding programs extend the day to 6:30pm. • The After-School program allows students to participate in asked if we could talk to Dr. Beverly myself every time I miss her. additional academic, athletic and extra-curricular activities. before we made any decisions. The As I was finishing up this piece, I doctor said she’d call him to fill him checked the mail and found a condo- in, and then we could call and speak lence card from the vet’s office, and with him. Just a few minutes later, the text is on target: “Some friends CALL TODAY! she came back in the room and said come into our lives and quickly go. MENTION THIS AD he was coming right over. Some stay for a while, leave paw I asked Dr. Beverly so many ques- prints on our hearts, and we are Students receive well-rounded tions, but they all really boiled down never, ever the same.” instruction in new Science & to “what should we do?” We’ll always have Lily’s paw print, I didn’t want Lily to suffer, but I and we are definitely all the better Computer Labs and a didn’t want to lose her, either. When for it. newly renovated Library, he said that we could certainly take Danielle Sullivan, a mom of three, Fine Arts Room, and Gymnasium. her home and bring her back when has worked as a writer and editor in we reconciled ourselves with the the parenting world for more than 10 poor prognosis, I took one look at years. Sullivan also writes about pets GSS is located in Inwood at the northern tip of Manhattan and conveniently located near highways (Henry Hudson Parkway beautiful Lily being cradled in my and parenting for Disney’s Babble.com. & Major Deegan Expressway) and multiple subways (A & 1) and bus routes (BX7, BX12, BX20 & BxM1) daughter’s arms, her lethargic look, Find Sullivan on her blogs, Just Write Lily is remembered after losing her life to intestinal cancer. and her obvious dehydration, and I Mom and Some Puppy To Love. April 2015 • Manhattan Family 15 the center of the planter then cover the roots with potting soil, gently pressing around the plant to secure in place. Remove foil.

Crazy critters Items needed: cardboard egg car- tons; tempera paint; tacky glue; wiggly eyes; miniature pompoms; hole punch; pipe cleaners; pencil. Cut and trim egg cups from the carton bottom. Paint outsides of the cups with tempera paint. Glue two wiggly eyes and a pompom nose on one side. Let dry. Trim pipe cleaners to 4 inches. With a sharp pencil, punch three holes on opposite sides of each carton cup. Push pipe cleaners from the outside of one hole through the inside of the opposite hole, bending pipe cleaner ends to create legs. Poke two holes on top of the cup near the eyes and insert pipe cleaners to make antennae. Other activity ideas: Have children create a mosaic design using various kinds of seeds, or create garden markers for plants by painting individual vegetable designs on soil and wrap a rubber band around flat stones. it to make a nose. To make the head, fill the stocking with about 1 inch Flourishing games of soil (nose should be positioned Divide children into teams and Party in the to the side of the head). Sprinkle play one or more of these relay grass seed on top of the soil and, games: “Water Down.” Use a small, without shifting it, add more soil on plastic watering can to transfer top of the grass seed until the head water from one bucket to another. is proportionate to the nose. Gather “Budding Bouquet.” Transport flow- the nylon opening and tie it off with ers one at a time from a bucket to another rubber band. Carefully turn a vase. “Can You Dig it?” Use child- the head over (tied off end will be sized shovels to move dirt from a at the back) and place in a shallow pile to fill a bucket. Another fun park plastic bowl. Cut two small oval idea is to give kids a magnifying By Denise yearian eyes from the lid, and use a perma- glass and paper bag and have a na- Creative ideas nent marker to draw in pupils. At- ture treasure hunt. lant seeds for a memorable tach the eyes to the head just above for planning birthday bash or just cel- the nose with straight pin. When Dirt diggin’ treat P ebrate spring! Here are sev- guests leave, tell them to add a little Items needed: Instant chocolate an outdoor eral great outdoor party ideas to fresh water to the bowl daily. Within pudding; milk; whipped cream (in a get you started. days, “hair” will begin to grow. tub); crushed Oreo cookies; gummy worms; serving cups, spoons. celebration Bloomin’ invitations prize planter You can prepare this fun treat or Create flowers from cardstock Items needed: small terra cotta let the guests help. Prepare instant and include party details, along planters painted with bright colors; pudding according to box instruc- with a suggestion for the children faux gemstones; glue guns (low tions. Let mixture sit for 5 minutes to wear outdoor play clothes. Place setting); permanent marker; alumi- until it thickens. Add whipped cream in an envelope, along with flower num foil; small stones; potting soil; and cookies. Transfer into serving seed packets. flowers. cups. Add more crushed cookies on Glue gemstones around the top of the pudding mixture. Garnish Turftop tommy upper, outer rim of the planter. with gummy worms. Give children Items needed: old pantyhose; Around the lower section of the spoons and let them dig in! ruler; scissors; rubber bands; pot- planter, write “My Garden of De- Other food ideas include a veggie ting soil; grass seed; small, flat plas- lights!” Place aluminum foil around tray; cucumber and cream cheese tic bowl with lid; permanent marker; the outside of the planter to protect sandwiches; veggie or fruit pizza; straight pins. it from getting dirt. Place the stone chocolate-dipped strawberries and Cut off approximately 5 -1/2 inches over the planter’s interior hole to fruit punch. from one-foot section of a pair of keep soil from leaking through dur- Denise Yearian is the former editor pantyhose. Pour a little potting soil ing watering. Fill planter one-third of two parenting magazines and the into the toe. Gather hose around the full of potting soil. Place flowers in mother of three children.

16 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Parenting Questioning gender Dear Sharon, girls and boys, in many ways. Our 5-year-old son wants to dress When children try things out it is like a girl. He says he’s not really a best for parents to keep their own boy and that he is a girl. What emotions separate from their inter- should we do? actions with their child and keep in mind all that they know about their Dear Parents, child’s personality when deciding Every 5 year old is unique. When how to respond to their little one’s Parents parents ask me questions such as ideas. this I usually talk for quite a while With potentially emotional top- helPing before agreeing on useful perspec- ics such as gender it can be par- tives. ticularly hard to sort out a calm, Parents Here are some general ideas that thoughtful response, but if you Sharon C. PeterS, Ma might be helpful as you think this remember you know your child, through. trust your thinking and watch how Five year olds experiment with things go. Over time (sometimes all kinds of ideas that grow and months, sometimes years), it is change with time, including sort- possible to sort through appropri- ing through the differences between ate reactions. In time, if you have ques- Sharon C. Peters is a mother and director of Parents helping Parents, tions or concerns, turn- 669 President St., Brooklyn (718) 638–9444, www.PhPonline.org. ing to a trusted pro- If you have a question about a challenge in your life (no issue is too big fessional for sup- or too small) e-mail it to Dear Sharon at [email protected]. port is always an option.

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April 2015 • Manhattan Family 17 Camp empowered

How to help your child achieve self-determination this summer

BY DR. HEIDI SMITH LUEDTKE spark a little self-determination in experiences make us feel engaged your kid. and excited while others drain and arents spend a lot of time I know it sounds too good to be deplete us. trying to motivate kids. We true. Your school-age slacker — The premise is simple: when an P use chore charts, check- the one who expects you to find activity meets our needs for auton- lists, reminders, and rewards to get his homework and pack his lunch omy, competence, and relatedness, them to feed the dog, clean their — might start doing some things we are energized and empowered. rooms, and complete schoolwork. for himself. And your often-bored Kids’ basic needs are no different But these techniques don’t change tween might come home with more from adults’. behavior long-term. Real motiva- pep in her step. Kids want to do things for them- tion must come from within. And Psychologists use self-determi- selves. They crave a sense of accom- time at camp may be all it takes to nation theory to explain why some plishment and routinely seek feed-

18 Manhattan Family • April 2015 choose a camp focused on art, science, sports, or music. Or, he Kids want to do may opt for a good, old-fashioned things for themselves. sleep-away experience, complete with row boats and weenie roasts. They crave a sense Some camp activities may be outside your kid’s comfort zone. of accomplishment Stretching is good. Your child may be unsure she and routinely seek can cross the slippery log over the feedback. And kids creek. She may tremble with ex- citement about her role in the the- thrive on connections ater production. Peers and counselors will coax her along and give with loved ones constructive advice. By the end of and peers. camp, she’ll be the star of her own adventure stories. Summer at St. Bart’S 2015 If your kid is an experienced camper, encourage him to share St. Bart’S Day Camp back. (“Look what I made, Mom!”) what he knows with newbies. Ages 3–6 • June 8th–August. And kids thrive on connections Being an ambassador or mentor with loved ones and peers. Feel- affirms kids’ competence in a big Junior aDventurerS & aDventure Camp ings of belongingness boost their way. Teaching a peer how to trim Ages 6–13 • June 29th–August. self-worth. Summer camp offers a sail or chip a golf ball out of the loads of opportunities to meet tall grass will take your son’s skills All options include swimming every day! all these needs. And that should to a higher level. His confidence make kids (and the parents who will soar in response. Swimming • SportS • muSic • ArtS & crAftS love them) very happy campers indeed. Relatedness rooftop plAyground • dAnce & movement Your biggest concerns about For more information, or to schedule a tour, contact us at Autonomy summer camp may center on the The need for autonomy is satis- social scene. Your child may not 212-378-0203 • [email protected] fied when kids control their own know anyone on arrival. That’s www.stbarts.org/summer-camp lives. okay. Camps create connections At camp, your son will have in many ways. Your kid will be endless opportunities to care instantly bonded with bunkmates for himself. Staff won’t select his because they share a home base. clothes, organize the contents of Family-style dining and friendly his locker, or remind him to put competitions encourage interac- at New York University on deodorant. No one will delay tion, too. The pursuit of shared dessert until he eats his veggies. goals — like building a robot or Independence is what camp is putting a frog in the counselor’s all about. Don’t worry. The world sleeping bag — cements kids’ ca- Ages won’t stop if your son wears the maraderie. 6 to 15 same shirt three days in a row. Extroverted kids may make lots His peers will speak up if he gets of friends at camp. Less-sociable July 6th to August 14th super stinky. souls may not. What matters most During the school year, many is that kids have opportunities to TM kids jump from one regularly talk, play, and live with a diverse 3D Minecraft Camp scheduled activity to the next group of peers. They won’t all be- with no unstructured time in become fast friends. Video Game Design Camp tween. Learning to navigate the Camp puts kids in charge of choppy waters of friendship for- Robotics Camp their own activities. Maybe your mation is a big part of the camp TM daughter will take a hike. Maybe experience. Your kid’s social skill Computer Programming with Java she’ll paint pottery. Maybe she’ll set will expand — even if she write you an email. It is up to doesn’t find a new BFF. Computer Programming with Scratch her to decide how she’ll spend No matter what your kid takes her free time. One thing is cer- to camp, he’ll come home with a Fashion Design Camp tain: she won’t sit around whining suitcase full of memories and a about having nothing to do. And renewed sense of self-determina- Jewelry Design Camp if she does, you won’t be there to tion. You’ll see it as soon as he hear it. wakes from his long post-camp Chess Camp nap. CIT Leadership Program Competence Heidi Smith Luedtke is a person- The need for competence is ality psychologist and mom of two satisfied when kids learn new adventurous kids. She is the author of (610) 664-8800 things and get positive feedback “Detachment Parenting.” Learn more about their efforts. Your kid might at HeidiLuedtke.com. lavnercamps.com

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 19 Camp Directory

British International School and nurturing environment. Campers downtowndaycamps.com Lavner Camps at NYU 20 Waterside Plaza, NYC 10010 enjoy arts and crafts, dance, sports, and The Downtown Day Camps have been Kimmel Center 212-481-2700 or www.bis-ny.org/ swimming, and trips to museums, amuse- offering the highest quality K-8th grade 60 Washington Square South, NYC summer-camp ment parks, bowling lanes, and more. summer programs for over 20 years. We 10012, 610-664-8800 or www. Splash into Summer at BIS-NY’s summer Breakfast, lunch and snacks are included. utilize our beautiful own Downtown lavnercamps.com camp for boys and girls ages 3 to 8. We Full season is July 6 -August 14. Half ses- Community Center and private pool Lavner Camps is excited to offer the fol- are committed to offering a stimulating sions are available. The camp day is from in combination with adjacent facilities lowing cutting edge summer camps for environment while encouraging cultural, 8:30am-5:30pm. Financial aid is available, and the beautiful Battery Park City ball Summer 2015! 3D Minecraft™ Camp, social and physical growth. Activities plus sibling and early-bird discounts. fields. Activities include swimming, out- Robotics Camp, Computer Programming include, but aren’t limited to: Swimming, The China Institute door field sports, arts and crafts, tennis, with Scratch, Computer Programming Math and Literacy, Music, Drama, karate, movement, music and drumming, with Java™, Video Game Design Camp 125 East 65th Street, NYC 10065 song shows, field trips, story pirates, with Apps!, Fashion Design Camp, Art, Science, Technology, Block Play/ 212-744-8181 or www.chinainstitute. Construction, Recreational Team Sports org and more, all supervised by experienced Jewelry Design Camp and Chess Camp. counselors and administrators. Campers may attend camp for one week & Events. Designed for different age groups rang- or multiple weeks! Early Arrival, Extended Activities for Nursery to Year 2 will take ing from 3-14, the Children’s Summer ESF Summer Camps at Day, and Private Lessons are available. place in the Lower Playground. Activities Program offers instruction of Chinese Riverdale Country School Ages 6 to 14. Campers are grouped by for Year 3 and Year 4 will take place in language and culture in an exciting and 5250 Fieldston Road, Bronx 10471 age and ability. Weekly camps available the Asser Levy or the Multipurpose Room interactive environment to students of 718-432-4807 or 1-800-529-CAMP or from July 6 to August 14. CIT Leadership if it is raining. There will also be a weekly ALL proficiency levels! Language centers www.esfcamps.com/Riverdale Program for motivated 13 to 15 year olds party every Friday; The Friday Party will upon exciting themes designed to inspire ESF Camps (Education, Sports and Fun) also available! be a themed celebration with games and learning, participation and engagement. is an award-winning, family-owned and activities that will give us the opportunity Additionally, Children will participate in operated camp since 1982. ESF features Neighborhood Playhouse to say goodbye to campers who will not cultural activities, such as: calligraphy, exciting programs offering over 60 activi- School of Theatre: Summer be returning the following week. Chinese sports, theatre, arts and crafts, ties, a wide variety of sports and new storytelling and cooking. Friday field trips Teen Studio & Youth adventures for boys and girls ages 4 to 15. Camp Henry to many of New York’s cultural institu- Workshops 301 Henry Street NYC 10002 tions will give your child a chance to Day Camp (ages 4-8) features arts & 340 E. 54th Street NYC 10003 212-254-3100 or www.henrystreet.org enjoy the summer sun. crafts, swimming, sports, music & drama, 212-688-3770 or www. Camp Henry, operated by Henry Street Innovation Lab, science, martial arts, playhousejuniors.com Settlement, offers a wide range of edu- Downtown Day Camps fencing, theme days, special events and [email protected] cational and recreational enrichment 120 Warren St., NYC 10007 much more. Young actors seeking rigorous, dynamic activities for children ages 5 - 13 in a safe 212-766-1104 or www. Sports Camp (ages 6-14) offers instruc- training in the heart of New York City tion and league games in soccer, bas- can now apply for three exciting sum- ketball, baseball, street hockey, lacrosse, mer workshops at the Neighborhood The team handball, flag football and golf Playhouse, where Sanford Meisner’s with swimming available daily. world-renowned acting method was born! Faculty from our adult Professional Weekday School Senior Camp (ages 9-15) offers art, Acting program, working professionals at Riverside Church swimming, sports, martial arts, fenc- and master teachers, train students in a ing and “True Life Adventures” into the conservatory environment. The perfor- worlds of outdoor adventure, drama, IS PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE mance skills learned are applicable to all digital photography, cooking, breakdanc- mediums: film, theatre, television, and ing, music production and more. new media. The Studio (15-18yrs) mir- Major Camps (ages 8-15) Think of it rors a challenging, diverse college-level Summerside Camp 2015 as a Liberal Arts Degree in fun! Offers curriculum. The Workshop (12-14yrs) pro- filmmaking, Minecraft, graphic design, vides serious, engaging pre-professional robotics and more! training and the Junior Group (9-11 yrs.), Tennis Camp (ages 6-15) designed for new this summer, explores a variety of beginner, intermediate and advanced techniques for the young actor. Each players. Morning, afternoon and full day program culminates in a presentation sessions available. for family & friends of the skills learned ESF offers 2-8 week options. An optional throughout this exhilarating course. extended day program is available. Acceptance to the program(s) is by Registration for the Summerside Camp program is under way. Optional bus transportation from New application and personal interview only. York City and Westchester County Please see www.playhousejuniors.com Information and registration forms are available: for details. Applications are processed The Harlem School of the on a rolling basis until the program is at ✓ ONLINE: www.wdsnyc.org/ SESSION I: June 15–26 Arts capacity. Space is limited. Apply now. pages/summerside-camp SESSION II: June 29–July 10 645 St. Nicolas Avenue, NYC 10030 New Country Day Camp: 212-926-4100 or www.Hsanyc.org ✓ CONTACT: Tricia Pool at (closed 7/3) 646-395-4355 or www.14streety.org The Harlem School of the Arts offers a [email protected] SESSION III: July 13–24 A Summer in the Country So Close to summer of fun in the arts for children the City! ✓ CALL: 212-870-6743 for Register for one, two or all sessions ages 4-12. ARTScape Summer Day Camp is an arts experience like no other. Voted ‘Best Day Camp’ in NYC by more information Mini Camp for Full Camp for Campers enjoy a variety of classes in 5 Nickelodeon’s ParentsConnect BE SURE TO SAVE A SPACE! 2’s & young 3’s: 3–6 year-olds: different art forms: music, dance, theatre, Fun, healthy outdoor experiences are at 8:45am–12:30pm 8:45am–2:30pm visual arts, and musical theatre. Weekly the heart of New Country Day Camp, Register by May 1, 2015 trips to NYC’s cultural destinations and the 14th Street Y’s premiere day camp afternoon swimming highlight the three for kids in Kindergarten through 6th 2-week sessions. Each session culminates grade. Swimming pools, hiking trails and 490 Riverside Drive • New York, NY 10027 with a showing for campers’ families and open meadows provide the setting for 212-870-6743 • [email protected] • www.wdsnyc.org friends. Join the fun! Prices start as low this idyllic camp on the 75-acre Henry as $325/week. Sign Up Early! Continued on page 22 20 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Special Advertising Section The Future Speaks Chinese! Start your child today! SummerDay!GES SummerStudyIN#HINA+

[email protected] • 212.744.8181 ext. 110 125 E. 65 St., New York, NY • www.chinainstitute.org/summer-program

“We are a Reading in Preschool family. We hired them since my daughter was reading ready but not overly interested in books. In all honesty, I saw her interest in reading immediately increase after the ﬁ rst lesson. 6 sessions later my daughter is reading simple words where ever she goes. Bottom line, if you want money well spent buy this class.” — Valoree H. - UWS Now booking fun Summer Intensive classes for ages 3-10! Over the summer break, most students lose 2 months of what they learned in the winter/ spring months. Help your child stay conﬁ dent and ahead of the game.

Readingin in Preschool ReadinginPreschool.com 917-723-1159 | [email protected]

Day, Sport, and Specialty Camps for boys & girls, ages 4-15 JUNE 15 – AUGUST 7 ENJOY CAMP AT RIVERDALE COUNTRY SCHOOL IN BRONX, NY 718.432.1013 esfcamps.com/Riverdale

DAY CAMP SPORTS CAMP SENIOR CAMP SPECIALTY TENNIS CAMP MAJOR CAMPS WAY MORE THAN DISCOVER YOUR EXPERIENCES EVEN MORE WAYS LESSON SERVED UP A TYPICAL DAY INNER ATHLETE! THEY’LL NEVER TO DISCOVER! WITH FULL & HALF- AT CAMP! LEARN & PLAY 9 OUTGROW! DAY OPTIONS BOYS & GIRLS OF BOYS & GIRLS, AGE 4-8 SPORTS WEEKLY. BOYS & GIRLS, AGE 9–15 VARIOUS AGES BOYS & GIRLS, AGE 6-15 BOYS & GIRLS, AGE 6-14

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 21 Camp Directory Summer Acting Intensive Continued from page 20 lessons, field trips, and special events. Conservatory instruction for serious young actors seeking rigorous, dynamic training Kaufmann Campgrounds on Staten Children have fun participating at the in the heart of New York City. Island, just 45 minutes from bus pick-up annual carnival, in-camp Olympics, talent points in Manhattan and Brooklyn. New shows and themed weeks. Oasis camp- SUMMER PROGRAMS Country Day Camp is also accredited by ers also engage in a wealth of enriching (3 Week Program in New York City) the American Camp Association activities such as cooking, martial arts, and creative writing. Oasis provides Teen Studio 15-18 yrs Activities include instructional swim led by 4x Olympic Gold Medalist Lenny children with all the tools to be active, Monday - Friday 9:30am-5:00pm Krayzelburg, free swim, boating, sports, safe, and develop lifelong friendships this summer! Oasis utilizes East River arts and crafts, gymnastics, science and Tween Workshop 12-14 yrs Park for plenty of outside summer fun. technology, camping, cooking & pioneer- Monday - Friday 9:30am-5:00pm Oasis Downtown is for kids ages 3-12. ing, martial arts, and performing arts. At Oasis, children enroll for a minimum 9-11 yrs Please visit our website for our open Junior Group of two consecutive weeks, a maximum Monday - Friday 10am-3pm house dates. RSVP is required: please of eight weeks, or any combination you email [email protected] or call choose. Families have the advantage to 646 -395- 4357. July 20th - August 7th enroll their children around their summer plans! Apply now! Limited Spaces Available. Oasis in Central Park Summer Program Physique Swimming “ I've learned so much about how to act, sing, and dance, I've met some wonderful people, 95th & Central Park West 212-725-0939 or www. and most of all, I've gained a life changing experience.” 718-596-4900 or www.oasischildren. physiqueswimming.com – Anzi D., Summer Teen 2014 com Physique Summer Camp has been a Former Junior Actors For more than ten years, in association favorite of parents and children alike, with the Central Park Conservancy, Oasis and our recent changes - like our new has provided children with a fantastic Olympic size pool - will make the expe- opportunity to play and learn in the rience we provide even better! Enjoy great outdoors without ever leaving an hour and a half swim, art, science, Manhattan. Located on the Upper West sports, and cooking! We look forward Side, Oasis utilizes Central Park’s incred- to having a great time together! Please Daisy EAGAN Brendan SEXTON, III Scarlett JOHANSSON Ally SHEEDY Frances CONROY Anderson COOPER ible collection of recreational facilities don’t hesitate to contact us with any 340 EAST 54TH STREET NY, NY 10022 | 212.688.3770 | PLAYHOUSEJUNIORS.COM including tennis and basketball courts, questions, or to schedule a tour. We have softball fields, soccer fields, nature a positive and inclusive social community trails, and an incredible Olympic-sized with individual and group instructional outdoor swimming pool. Oasis also sport. utilizes two indoor facilities, including Instructional swim and Fun Swim is only their new home at The Mandell School part of the Physique Summer Camp on Columbus Ave, with access to class- experience. We also have daily games rooms, gymnasiums, an auditorium, and of organized team sports, weekly other large meeting spaces. A traditional intra-camp competition. Campers day camp in every way, Oasis in Central will participate in the Physique World Park’s program includes sports and HE RITISH NTERNATIONAL CHOOL Championship (Swimming, Track and T B I S recreation, visual and performing arts, Field) with awards for sportsmanship, OF NEW YORK recreational and Red Cross instructional teamwork, leadership. Campers receive swim, field trips, and an outdoor educa- a T-shirt too! Options for extended days tion component that includes environ- are available. We welcome you to call Circus club mental studies, orienteering and much and schedule a tour! KEEP CALM more. Oasis in Central Park is the perfect Music jam sessions opportunity for children to have an active Reading In Preschool AND and safe summer while making lifelong Private In-Home Tutoring Manhattan Soccer games friends along the way! Oasis day camp NYC, 917-723-1159 or www. is for kids ages 3-11. For emerging teens Readinginpreschool.com COME TO CAMP! Daily swim ages 12-14 Oasis offers the Teen Travel This summer your child can have fun and instruction program which gives emerging teens the stay ahead scholastically! We offer fun opportunity to take unique trips every teachers who can teach your child to Science & technology day. At Oasis, children enroll for a mini- read, write, learn math, play piano and enrichment mum of two consecutive weeks, a maxi- chess, or learn a new language; all within mum of eight weeks, or any combination the privacy of your own home! Coding lessons for you choose. Families have the advantage Balancing out daytime sports and activi- senior campers to enroll their children around their sum- ties outside, and then having an hour of mer plans! tutoring at the end of the day, is a great Daily Maths & way to make sure your child stays ahead Literacy games Oasis Downtown Summer of the game, and enters the new school June 22 - July 31 2015 ee la Program year with confidence. Book in April to to s st y e ea 285 Delancey St. Lower East Side, r r make sure you get your own private e s h c Manhattan , 718-596-4900 or www. tutor! 5 days a week from 9am - 3pm n a

m a

c oasischildren.com

S For boys and girls ages 3 - 9 years ! Oasis Downtown is located in the heart Spring Lake Day Camp Book before March 31st to receive 10% early bird discount. of Manhattan’s Lower East Side. Oasis 234 Conklintown Road Ringwood, NJ Visit www.bis-ny.org to book your place! partners with Kids Creative to offer a 973-831-9000 wide variety of performing arts instruc- Just 25 miles from the GWB, Spring 20 Waterside Plaza, Riverview Campus, New York, NY 10010 | 212-481-2700 | www.bis-ny.org tion and activities! Still a traditional Lake Day Camp of Ringwood, NJ is the day camp in every way, other activities place to be. Our 30 acre campus is a include sports and recreation, swim Continued on page 24 22 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Special Advertising Section

Winston Preparatory School

Summer Program

Education for the Individual

A unique individually designed program aimed to develop:

Reading Comprehension Study Strategies

Decoding and Spelling Writing

Organizational Skills Math

th th Small class sizes for students in 4 through 12 grades

After-school activities include basketball, art, music, yoga,

photography, acting, computing, and dance

One-on-one classes and independent study program available during July and August

June 26 – July 24, 2015

126 West 17th Street New York, NY 10011 646-638-2705 ext. 688 [email protected] applications available online at www.winstonprep.edu s!2#(%29s!243#2!&43s"!3%"!,,s"!3+%4"!,,s"/!4).'s#%2!-)#3s#,)-").'7!,,s#//+).'s$!.#%s$2!-!s%52/"5.'9s ).3s )(.s ! ! '+23 '-!4#s (/#+%9 s '9-.!34)#3 s +!243 '/ s '! '! s &)3().' s &)4.%33

Centrally Located! Only 25 Miles from the GWB!

s4%..)3 42!$).' 0/34 s 6/,,%9"!,, s 7!4%2 3,)$%3 s :)0 ,).% s -5#( 4%#( -/2% s 37)- ).3425#4)/. s 3/&4"!,, s 3/##%2 s 2/0%3 s .!452% s -53)# s ,!#2/33% s +!2!4% s (/23%"!#+ 2)$).' s

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 23 Camp Directory

Continued from page 22 The Weekday School kid’s paradise offering a well balanced 490 Riverside Drive swim, sports and arts program. Our 212-870-6743 or www.wdnyc.org/ unique daily camp experience offers a 5 pages/summerside-camp acre lake for boating and fishing, heated The Weekday School offers a summer pools with water slides, awesome athletic camp program for June and July. The fields, adventure ropes, shade and plenty Summerside Program runs for six weeks of indoor facilities for rainy day events. divided into three two-week sessions. Catered lunch, door to door air-condi- The Mini-Camp is for children 2.6 to 3.6 tioned mini-bus transportation and uni- years of age and runs from 8:45am to form shirts included. We are the perfect 12:30 daily and included a daily snack. choice for Manhattan campers. We are The Full Camp is for children 3.6 to 6 not just a camp, we are a family. SLDC is years of age and runs from 8:45am to single family owned and operated since 2:30pm daily and includes daily snack 1989 by Mitchell and Michelle Kessler and hot lunch. who currently reside on the Upper West Side. We are proud to be celebrating our Camp activities for both the Mini and 27th season. Every child deserves a SLDC Full Camps include arts & crafts, music, CAMP HENRY Summer. dance/movement, water play and sports on our rooftop play area and play time Summer at St. Bart’s on our large outdoor and indoor play 325 Park Avenue NYC 10022 structures.

212-378-0238 or www.stbarts.org Children in the Full Camp also take one At Summer at St. Bart’s, campers ages local walking trip during each two-week 3-13 have week after week of fun! session and one field trip to destinations Each day includes swimming, sports, such as the The Central Park Zoo, The music, arts and crafts, a rooftop play- New York Hall of Science and Chelsea ground, dance and movement, and Pier. 6 4 more! Running June 8th-August 21st, 6 31 the day camp is perfect for ages 3-6. Winston Preparatory 3 4 Junior Adventurers or Adventure Camp School Summer Program is great for campers’ ages 6-13 and 126 West 17th Street includes fun-filled trips around the city. 646-638-2705, ext. 688 or www. All options include SWIMMING EVERY winstonprep.edu DAY! For families with working parents, The Summer Enrichment Program at early drop-off and after camp options Winston Preparatory School provides are available. To receive more informa- students with the unique opportunity to tion or schedule a tour, contact Summer at St. Bart’s at [email protected] participate in an individually designed or 212-378-0203. Check out our new program to enhance academic skills and online registration at www.stbarts.org/ performance. Students in grades 4-12 summer-camp. attend four academic classes each day as well as art, music, and gym classes SummerDay @ The Trevor from 9:00 am to 1:30 pm, from June Day School 26-July 24. Students are grouped by 11 East 89th Street NYC 10128 learning style and skill level in classes no 212-426-3307 or www.trevor.org/ larger than eight individuals in order to SummerDay facilitate greater learning and maximize [email protected] individualized instruction. At SummerDay we learn through play . The program develops decoding and . . . and play to learn. This two- to five- encoding, reading comprehension, week summer program for children ages critical-thinking skills, memory retrieval, 3-6 offers small groups led by experi- organizational skills, written language enced Trevor Day School teachers. Our expression, self-advocacy, mathemati- remarkable staff makes sure your child cal computation, time-management has a safe summer experience, filled with skills, test preparation, and expressive fun and developmentally appropriate language skills within a nurturing, aca- activities. SummerDay provides space, demic environment. From 2:00-3:30 materials, and activities through which pm, students may also enroll in optional your child will have fun, be challenged, one-on-one classes to target specific and make exciting discoveries. The pro- skill development and/or engage in June 22–July 24 gram includes field trips, cooking, arts SummerDay after-school activities such as digital and crafts, science experiments, free photography, art, acting, cross-training, Lisa GoldbergttMHPMECFSH!USFWPSPSH play, storytelling, sports, movement, www.trevor.org/SummerDay swimming lessons for all the children, music, zumba, and computing basics. and much more. We also have our Students may also enroll in one-on-one rooftop playground, a favorite of all the sessions from August 3-20. Students children. We have early drop-offs avail- from private, public, and parochial able for all ages and a wonderfully air- schools from New York City and abroad conditioned setting for your little camp- participate in the program. Scholarships Find Family online at www.NYParenting.com ers. Register online or call Lisa Goldberg are available. to discuss your summer program options For further information, brochures, or at SummerDay. applications, please call or e-mail. 24 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Special Advertising Section ously slow to get through airports. Yelling “Let’s go!” at the top of your lungs may turn some heads, but it won’t make your poky pre-teen move any faster. Instead make the most of kids’ pre-vacation excite- ment by treating the airport like a fun destination. Start by turning the dreaded security screen into a race; have kids try to get their shoes off and unload their luggage onto the conveyer belt as fast as they pos- sibly can, says Graff. “It’s a game of speed and it can be a lot of fun.” School-age kids respond well to delegation, so assign each child a responsibility pre-take-off and in-flight, like carrying the family’s flight snacks or marshalling carry- ons as they come through the security conveyor. Grade-school- ers are also old enough to take responsibility for their personal belongings, both in the airport and in-flight; before boarding and de- planing, gently remind your child to gather her things — but don’t do it for her (you undoubtedly a packing list (you have your own hands full). can find one online at BabyCen- Teen years 13- ter.com). 18: Time travel “You might A long flight layover with bicker- not find the ing teen siblings is a recipe for va- Sunny right kind of cation disaster; quell squabbles by diapers or allowing each sibling to take charge t h a t e x a c t b a b y of a family decision (one sib can pick food your little one loves at your des- a lunch locale at the airport, while tination. This is the time when you another gets to select dinner fare don’t want to forget anything.” Prep at the destination). Bring a deck of for a smooth takeoff and landing by cards, teen-friendly snacks, and an skies planning to feed baby — by breast extra set of batteries and AC adapt- or bottle — during the plane’s ascent ers to keep electronics charged up By Malia JacoBson and descent; the sucking motion while you wait. Safe, happy helps equalize pressure inside their On the trip, avoid the “teen tune- hoever said, “Getting tiny ears to minimize painful pop- out” during travel by creating a con- air travel there is half the fun,” ping (and the resulting screams). Re- nection to your destination before W never flew cross-country member to pack a few more diapers you leave. Did your family’s ances- with a needy newborn, a boister- than you think you’ll need on flight, tors hail from the region? Do you with kids ous toddler, or a moody tween. Not and a change of clothes — or sev- have any childhood stories about to mention a purse full of wrinkled eral. And don’t forget to pack extra the area? Any major historical hap- airline tickets and coloring books, clothes in your carry-on for a toddler penings? Young teens may get a snacks for every member of the fam- or preschooler. kick out of an on-flight scavenger ily, and a caravan of luggage. On a long flight from California to hunt with landmarks to watch for At best, airplane travel with chil- North Carolina, Raleigh native Chris- during take-off and landing. Ap- dren can be educational and excit- ten Pope remembered to pack plenty pointing a teen “trip historian” with ing. At worst, it’s an all-out night- of clothes for 7-month-old Sydney, responsibility for journaling and mare. Here’s how to plan for a memo- but forgot a change for her newly documenting the trip with photos rable (in a good way) trip that starts potty-trained 3-year-old Jaden. Guess ensures that you’ll have plenty of before you land. who needed fresh pants shortly after memorabilia — and gives you a take-off? She can bet she’ll never for- chance to view the trip through Baby-toddler years get again. your teen’s eyes. 0-4: Plane plan Malia Jacobson is a nationally pub- Air travel with tots in tow takes School years lished sleep and health journalist and planning, patience, and more plan- 5-12: Fun fare author of “Sleep Tight, Every Night: Help- ning. Celebrity travel expert and Elementary-age children usually ing Toddlers and Preschoolers Sleep mom Amy Graff recommends using love plane travel, but can be notori- Well Without Tears, Tricks, or Tirades.”

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 25 Beware the Nanny Tax By Shnieka L. JohnSon gross pay, withholdings, and net pay. for the employee. However, if the How to protect With a log of her hours, and the nanny does meet those thresholds, or working families it is nearly total amount paid, your filing obliga- the employer is liable for a penalty yourself and impossible to care for children tions are easier to determine. There of $2,000 per 10-day period of non- F without additional help of a are several paycheck calculators on- compliance. your caregiver hired caregiver, like a nanny. Some line. However, these tools alone will SJ: Are there certain qualifica- families pay their nanny “under the not help determine what your fil- tions or rules to abide by? by following table,” which is not legal and can ing obligations are, what filing dead- nk: A good nanny tax payroll be costly. When families fail to pay lines apply to your situation, and service should have someone who what many refer to as the “Nanny any other employer issues, such as is well versed in the Domestic Em- the law at Tax,” fines and penalties can cost Workers’ Comp., Disability, benefits, ployer Laws of your state. In New them significantly — up to $25,000. sick pay, and paid rest. York, that means the New York State tax time However, the process of properly Step 3. Apply for a Federal Em- Domestic Workers’ Bill of Rights, calculating, filing, and paying payroll ployer Identification Number (EIN). Days of Paid Rest, and the city’s Paid taxes can be confusing for the aver- Step 4. Ask your nanny to com- Sick Leave Law. age person. To address this issue, plete form W-4 and form I-9, a soon SJ: What are the benefits to the services have appeared, known as as possible. Form I-9 is your record nanny? Nanny Tax services, to consistently that she is legally able to work in nk: Immediately, your nanny is and accurately document and pay the United States. Form W-4 is used able to show proof of income. With- a nanny or other domestic service to determine how much should be out this proof, how will your nanny providers. withheld from the nanny’s check rent a better apartment, be approved There are several advantages each pay period. for a mortgage, or get a new car loan? of using a Nanny Tax service. You Step 5. Register with your state In the short term, she may be eligible will not only protect yourself as an as an employer. For New York, look for the earned income credit. Being employer from potential penalties, for Form NYS 100. Form NYS 100 is paid on the books could mean ac- but you will also ensure that your for businesses and household em- cess to better healthcare under the nanny receives short and long-term ployers to apply for an Employer Affordable Care Act. She could draw benefits (e.g., Social Security and Registration Number, to ensure that unemployment once her charges are Medicare) upon retirement and un- quarterly tax remittances are cred- school-aged, and her services are no employment benefits for when you ited promptly and accurately. longer needed. In the long term, she no longer need full-time care. This Step 6. Fill out a state New Hire contributes to Social Security and also provides a verifiable employ- Report for your nanny. This will Medicare, which she will need to ment history and the possibility of alert state agencies that you have a draw from at retirement age. reduced health care via the Afford- new employee. Simply Google: “New She also establishes a legitimate able Care Act. Hire for State (X),” and you will find work history. It means a lot to em- To learn more about the Nanny the reporting instructions. For New ployers to know you were trusted Tax, I spoke to mom entrepreneur York, the website is www.nynewhire. with small children for a number of Nikki Kristol, the founder and man- com. years. You are a stronger employ- aging Partner at My Home Payroll, Step 7. Check to see if Workers’ ment reference for your nanny. www.myhomepayroll.com. Compensation is required in your The nanny profession needs to be Shnieka Johnson: What are the state. I do this for clients as soon elevated somehow. What we have is steps to legally hire a nanny? as possible. The penalties for not a reputable profession that is usually nikki kristol: Step one would be having adequate workers’ comp are paid in a disreputable manner (i.e., to consider hiring a nanny tax pro- usually more punitive and immedi- off the books). fessional to do your home payroll. ate than failure to pay nanny taxes. Today’s money-grab for the nanny The steps to legally hire a nanny are For example, in New York State, if comes at a cost tomorrow. The very involved and time-consuming. your nanny works less than 40 hours nanny may one day realize she is If you are determined to do-it-your- a week, and does not live in your working very hard at a job that of- self, there is a lot to do. home, you are not required to carry fers no benefits in the long term. She Step 2: Track your nanny’s hours, Workers’ Compensation Insurance may become resentful of that, but 26 Manhattan Family • April 2015 “The nanny profession needs to be elevated somehow. What we have is a reputable profession that is usually paid in a disreputable manner (i.e., off the books).”

so accustomed to not paying NK: No, the nanny tax applies to the tax, and therefore anyone who can be considered a unable to change the household employee. It includes any situation. I like to housekeeper, yard-worker, driver, sit- work with nannies ter, private nurse, domestic worker, that know from caregiver, etc., where you determine the start they what work they do and how it has to want to be paid be done. Your nanny is your house- on the books, and hold employee, regardless if she won’t accept any- works part-time or full-time. Your thing less. These household employees are to receive nannies are usu- a W-2, not a form 1099, at the end of ally happy with the year. their work, and SJ: Why is it important for fami- are treated as lies to hire a “Nanny Tax” profes- professionals. sional? SJ: What are NK: Many working families simply the benefits to the do not have time and tax knowledge employer? to be their own payroll service. Pay- NK: A benefit to ing the nanny tax means paperwork, clients of My Home filings, and record keeping. If there is Payroll is that we a problem with the record keeping pay your nanny by or the payments, the employer may direct debit, and have to speak to, and correspond we file your nanny with taxing authorities, and other taxes automatically. government agencies. It is time con- Our clients have the suming. Knowledgeable tax profes- added benefit of no sional will be able to help the fam- paperwork and no ily pay nanny taxes seamlessly, and running to the ATM handle all of the extras. on Fridays to with- SJ: A re there ta x credits that ever y draw cash for the parent should be familiar with? nanny. NK: Yes. Every parent should Avoiding the know about the Dependent Care nanny tax can ex- FSA, and the Child or Dependent pose you to back Care Tax Credit. taxes, interest and The Dependent Care Flexible penalties. For some Spending Account is a benefit of- parent-employers, it could fered by your employer. It allows the mean sanctions, or the loss parent to set aside up to $5,000 of of a professional qualification. pre-tax dollars to pay for child care. As a mom, I feel that I have Check with your HR department to a unique perspective on house- see if your employer offers an FSA. hold employment, and how to Child and Dependent Care Tax pay for it properly. I believe pay- Credit, this “Child Tax Credit” is ing off the books taints the rela- available to taxpayers who both are tionship you have with your nanny full-time students, work outside of from day one. Because you don’t set the home, or are looking for work, boundaries in terms of pay, you don’t and have to pay for child care. The create a professional relationship to Tax Credit is a dollar-for-dollar re- take seriously. You place yourself in duction in tax liability of $600 or “cahoots” with your nanny from the $1,200, depending if you have one or start. The nanny may see you as a more children. Apply for this credit rule-breaker. The nanny may, in on Form 2441 and attach it to your turn, expect you to turn a blind-eye yearly tax return form 1040. to her occasional rule-breaking. Is Shnieka Johnson is an education con- this the kind of environment you sultant and freelance writer. She is based want your child to live in? in Manhattan where she resides with her SJ: Does the “Nanny Tax” only husband and son. Contact her via her apply to nannies? website: www.shniekajohnson.com. April 2015 • Manhattan Family 27 Tourism Toronto (Clockwise from top left) The touch tank at Ripleys Aquarium. The Toronto skyline. Casa Loma. The CN Tower observation deck. Time to visit Toronto By Shnieka L. JohnSon ball’s Raptors, and soccer’s Toronto mission ticket lines. In the booklet, Ontario’s FC. The city also has a football team you will find your tickets, detailed oronto is a city that caters (the Argonauts), a lacrosse team (the attraction information, coupons, diverse to almost anyone — it is kid- Toronto Rock) and a second hockey and a map. T friendly, multinational, and team (the Marlies) that is affiliated Shnieka Johnson is an education con- has a vibrant culture. The capital of with the Maple Leafs. sultant and freelance writer. She is based capital city Ontario, Toronto, is the most popu- In getting around Toronto, it is in Manhattan, where she resides with lated city in Canada and the most quite manageable by foot or on pub- her husband and son. Contact her via diverse. Exploring the city is a unique lic transit. There is also “Bike Share her website, www.shniekajohnson.com. offers lots of experience, because many neighbor- Toronto,” which is similar to New hoods host distinctive shops and York City’s own bike-sharing pro- Black Creek family fun places to eat, such as Kensington Mar- gram. One of the best resources Pioneer Village ket. One of the best ways to explore available while exploring Toronto is [1000 Murray Ross Pkwy., (416) 736– the city is through a free heritage walk the “See Toronto” mobile app, which 1733, www.blackcreek.ca] or a city-sponsored and themed “dis- can be downloaded for free and will Toronto’s largest outdoor living covery walk” around the city. list things to see and do while you history museum. Take your family The city is brimming with activity, are there. The app includes easy- to enjoy a unique experience, and and you will not lack for something to-search listings for events, dining, learn what it was like to live in rural to see or do. Toronto has a reputa- attractions, and shopping. Ontario. You can learn about Victo- tion for high-quality, live theatre, A great way to see attractions at rian costumes, take a horse-drawn and it now boasts the third largest a discounted price is to purchase a wagon ride, and see the process theatre scene in the world. CityPASS, which is a booklet that of making maple syrup using tradi- Of course, there is a lot to like for will give you admission to five tour- tional syrup cauldrons. the sports lovers because Toronto ist attractions. CityPASS booklets has several professional teams, in- are valid for nine consecutive days, Hockey Hall of Fame cluding baseball’s Blue Jays, the beginning with the first day of use, [30 Yonge St. between Wellington Maple Leafs hockey team, basket- and it allows you to skip most ad- Street W and Front Street E, (416) 360–

28 Manhattan Family • April 2015 7735, www.hhof.com] nation with two observation levels At 60,000 square feet, the Hall and an outdoor SkyTerrace. of Fame offers something for every ST.BRIGID SCHOOL member of the family. The space Casa Loma showcases a collection of hockey [1 Austin Terr. at Walmer Road, NROLL OW artifacts, offers hands-on activi- (416) 923–1171, http://casaloma.org/] E N ! ties that challenge shooting and Casa Loma is the only landmark Offering Free Tuition for 4 Year Olds! goal-keeping skills. There are also castle in North America. Your fam- themed exhibits dedicated to the ily can explore secret passages game’s greatest players, teams, and and tunnels, tour the stables, or achievements. For the tech savvy, view an exhibition of vintage cars you’ll find multimedia stations to from the 1900s. Take a look at further learning about the sport. the city view from various towers. The castle’s gardens are open May Niagara Falls through October. [6650 Niagara Pwky., (905) 358– 3268, www.niagaraparks.com] Ontario Science Center One of the Seven Wonders of the [770 Don Mills Road between Eglin- World is just a short drive from To- ton Avenue East and Gateway Boule- ronto. Experience the power of the vard, (416) 696–1000, http://ontario- Falls and the natural beauty of the sciencecentre.ca/] PRE-K FORALL surrounding area. The science center boasts in- April Tour Dates: teractive experiences, more than Monday, April 13 & 20 ~ 9am to 2pm Ripley’s Aquarium 500 exhibits, live demonstrations, Wednesday, April 22 ~ 9am to 7pm [288 Bremner Blvd. at Lower Sim- a planetarium, and IMAX dome All Tours will be conducted at St.Brigid School (7th Street Main Campus) coe Street, (647) 351–FISH (3474), theatre. Your little one will love St. Brigid Early Childhood Center www.ripleyaquariums.com/canada] KidSpark, a playground and learn- Canada’s largest indoor aquar- ing space for children, ages 1 to 8. (12th St. & Avenue D Campus) ium, it features extensive exhib- DOE Enrollment Code: 01MBAAFDPK its and touch pools for hands- Royal Ontario Museum Call: 347-903-8783 • www.stbrigidschoolny.com on learning. A very special activ- [100 Queen’s Park at Bloor Street W ity offered at the aquarium is the and Charles Street W. Main entrance SBS will Offer a Program for 2-Year-Olds Coming September 2015 off Bloor Street West in the Michael Tourism Toronto “Family Sleepover.” (Please note, Enrollment is Now Open (Clockwise from top left) The touch tank at Ripleys Aquarium. The Toronto skyline. Casa Loma. The CN Tower observation deck. there is an additional fee to stay Lee-Chin Crystal, (416) 586–8000, overnight.) You and your family http://www.rom.on.ca/] can spend the evening exploring This is Canada’s largest museum the aquarium, participating in of natural history and world cul- 12TH ANNUAL APRIL 22–24, 2015 hands-on experiences, and learn- tures. Whether your child loves di- Wyndham New Yorker Hotel ing about the animals, and then nosaurs, is interested in history or tuck into your sleeping bags in the nature — there’s something excit- Time to visit Toronto “Dangerous Lagoon” shark tunnel. ing for everyone at this museum! Upcoming Family Sleepover Dates:

By Shnieka L. JohnSon ball’s Raptors, and soccer’s Toronto mission ticket lines. In the booklet, May 23, June 13, and June 27. Toronto Zoo KEYNOTE Ontario’s FC. The city also has a football team you will find your tickets, detailed [2000 Meadowvale Rd., Northeast SPEAKERS oronto is a city that caters (the Argonauts), a lacrosse team (the attraction information, coupons, Textile Museum of downtown at Highway 401 and GREAT SPEAKERS. GREAT LEARNING. SISTER TESA FITZGERALD to almost anyone — it is kid- Toronto Rock) and a second hockey and a map. [55 Centre Ave. between Dundas Meadowvale Road (exit 389), (416) (Excellence in Early Childhood HELPING YOUNG CHILDREN LEARN & GROW diverse Award Recipient), Executive T friendly, multinational, and team (the Marlies) that is affiliated Shnieka Johnson is an education con- Street W and Armoury Street, (416) 392–5929, http://torontozoo.com/] Director, Hour Children OVERVIEW has a vibrant culture. The capital of with the Maple Leafs. sultant and freelance writer. She is based 599–5321, www.textilemuseum.ca/] The 700-acre zoo showcases Over 100 Speakers Ontario, Toronto, is the most popu- In getting around Toronto, it is in Manhattan, where she resides with The museum houses more than more than 5,000 animals, repre- DAN ZANES More than 80 Conference Sessions capital city President/Founder Full Day Pre-Conference Workshop lated city in Canada and the most her husband and son. Contact her via 13,000 textile artifacts, archaeologi- senting 450 species. Learn how the Festival Five Records quite manageable by foot or on pub- 40 Exhibitors & Over 1,200 Attendees expected diverse. Exploring the city is a unique lic transit. There is also “Bike Share her website, www.shniekajohnson.com. cal to contemporary. The museum Toronto Zoo is working to protect offers lots of DR. TEMPLE GRANDIN TOPICS experience, because many neighbor- Toronto,” which is similar to New addresses the nuances of cultures animals and endangered species Professor Dept. of Animal Science ADHD Emotional Intelligence hoods host distinctive shops and York City’s own bike-sharing pro- Black Creek and identities in a global context. at home and abroad. Open year Colorado State University Autism Essentials Educational Policy family fun places to eat, such as Kensington Mar- gram. One of the best resources Pioneer Village Through initiatives like TXTilecity, round! Bring the kids in spring, Behavior Management Music and Learning DR. DIANE CRAFT ket. One of the best ways to explore available while exploring Toronto is [1000 Murray Ross Pkwy., (416) 736– the museum moves beyond its summer, fall, or winter! Professor Bullying Play Physical Education Department Developmental Discipline Social Skills Development the city is through a free heritage walk the “See Toronto” mobile app, which 1733, www.blackcreek.ca] physical space and merges into the State University of NY at Cortland Early Literacy Speech Language Issues or a city-sponsored and themed “dis- can be downloaded for free and will Toronto’s largest outdoor living diverse communities that surround Additional links: . . . and many more MAGGIE DOYNE covery walk” around the city. list things to see and do while you history museum. Take your family it in new ways, and in new spaces. www.toronto-theatre.com/index_ Founder and CEO BlinkNow Foundation The Young Child Expo & Conference will provide The city is brimming with activity, are there. The app includes easy- to enjoy a unique experience, and family.php, http://txtilecity.ca/ early childhood professionals and parents the latest and you will not lack for something to-search listings for events, dining, learn what it was like to live in rural CN Tower index.php information about early childhood development, to see or do. Toronto has a reputa- attractions, and shopping. Ontario. You can learn about Victo- [301 Front St. W at Lower Simcoe Tourism: www.seetorontonow. NICHOLAS KRISTOF services, resources, and products to help all children Author, A Path Appears reach their full potential. In one unique event, this tion for high-quality, live theatre, A great way to see attractions at rian costumes, take a horse-drawn Street, (416) 86–TOWER (868-6937), com/mobile-app, www.citypass.com/ Columnist, New York Times conference integrates learning about a wide variety of and it now boasts the third largest a discounted price is to purchase a wagon ride, and see the process http://cntower.ca/] toronto, www.kensington-market.ca, 2 DAY PRE-CONFERENCE iimimportantmporttantanan totopicsopicpi ssa affectingaffffefffectictingng typicallytytypypypicaccaallyllyly developingded children theatre scene in the world. of making maple syrup using tradi- In the heart of the Toronto Enter- www.bikesharetoronto.com WORKSHOP SPEAKER CityPASS, which is a booklet that DR. VINCENT J. CARBONE asa well as those Of course, there is a lot to like for will give you admission to five tour- tional syrup cauldrons. tainment District, Canada’s most Sports: http://toronto.bluejays. NYS Licensed Behavior withwwii special needs, Analyst CEO, Carbone Clinic To register go to: includingininnc autism. the sports lovers because Toronto ist attractions. CityPASS booklets celebrated piece of architecture, mlb.com, www.torontofc.ca, maple- www.YoungChildExpo.com has several professional teams, in- are valid for nine consecutive days, Hockey Hall of Fame the CN Tower offers the most spec- leafs.nhl.com, www.nba.com/rap- REGISTER BEFORE or call 212-787-9700, ext. 333 cluding baseball’s Blue Jays, the beginning with the first day of use, [30 Yonge St. between Wellington tacular views of Toronto. This is tors, www.marlies.ca, www.argo- MARCH 25, 2015 Early Bird & Group Discounts Maple Leafs hockey team, basket- and it allows you to skip most ad- Street W and Front Street E, (416) 360– an entertainment and dining desti- nauts.ca, www.torontorock.com EARLY BIRD DISCOUNTS

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 29 Star with a cause By Shnieka L. JohnSon Academy Award-nominee Quvenzhané Wallis wants to end the blight of childhood Young hunger in America. ctress Quvenzhané Wallis actress puts first gained notice for her hunger. Millions of school children I am partnering with Kellogg’s in A role in the 2012 film “Beasts in the United States are faced with order to spread the word about Of The Southern Wild.” The role of this challenge. childhood hunger in America. I spotlight on Hushpuppy led her to becoming the Quvenzhané’s mother, Qulyn- learned that one in five children youngest actress to ever receive dreia, is a former school teacher, may go to school hungry, including hungry kids an Academy Award nomination. At a nd she k nows f irst ha nd how hu nger my peers at school, and knew that the time, she was just 9 years old. can impact children on a day-to-day I wanted to join Kellogg’s in spread- She most recently starred in Sony basis. Mother and daughter joined ing awareness on this issue. Picture’s 2014 remake of “Annie,” in Kellogg’s efforts to give breakfast SJ: Can you tell me a little about which she played the title charac- to kids in need. The two have been the “Give A Child A Breakfast” pro- ter. The 11-year-old, Louisiana na- promoting the “Breakfasts for Bet- gram? tive is known for playing children ter Days” campaign, which is part QW: I am partnering with Kel- from disadvantaged backgrounds, of Kellogg’s commitment to provide logg’s in order to spread the word and this has inspired her to help one billion servings of cereal and on childhood hunger in America. other kids suffering from childhood snacks to disadvantaged children My mom, being a teacher, has al- and families around the world by ways made sure I have breakfast 2016. Kellogg’s is taking a step to- before I leave for school. All kids Action for Healthy Kids wards that goal by providing up to need and deserve the opportunity Action for Healthy Kids is a nonprofit and volunteer network target- one million breakfasts in 2015. The to reach their full potential — and ing both childhood obesity and undernourishment. The kids would company is also partnering with starting the day with a great break- otherwise not get that first meal of the day. By helping schools create the nonprofit organization Action fast can help get you going. or improve existing breakfast programs, the organization works to for Healthy Kids — for a fifth year SJ: Why did you choose to team make schools become healthier places where kids learn to eat right, — to provide more children with up with Kellogg’s for this initiative? be active, and develop healthy habits. breakfasts in schools. QW: I joined Kellogg’s when I It helps nearly 12.9 million kids in 29,000 schools across this coun- I spoke to Quvenzhane about her learned that one in five children try. Through its School Grants for Healthy Kids program and Kellogg’s, partnership with Kellogg’s, other may go to school hungry, including it’s working to help provide one million breakfasts during the 2015-2016 upcoming projects, and just what my peers at school. Even though school year. To apply for grants, visit www.actionforhealthykids.org/ it’s like to juggle adolescence and I’m an actress, I’m still a normal kid tools-for-schools/apply-for-grants. Hollywood. that goes to school and has home- Links: www.kelloggs.com/en_US/give.html, www.actionforhealthykids. Shnieka Johnson: What projects work. I’m fortunate enough to start org/ are you currently working on? my day with a great breakfast, like Quvenzhane Wallis: Right now, Kellogg’s Rice Krispies and milk,

30 Manhattan Family • April 2015 NEW YORK SPECIAL CHILD

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To advertise your business and or services School blues Wallis acted opposite Jamie Foxx in “Annie” in 2014. Overcoming anxiety contact us at 718-260-4554 or e-mail us at [email protected] and I want to help other kids have Shnieka Johnson: How do you that same opportunity. I’m ex- manage your daughter’s sched- cited for the chance to help other ule between home life, work, and Family Publications New York/CNG kids my age to reach their full school? 1 MetroTech Center North - 10th Fl. • Brooklyn, NY 11201 potential. You can learn more at Qulyndreia Wallis: The num- 718-260-4554 • [email protected] www.kelloggs.com/give. ber one thing is that my husband SJ: Any upcoming movies or and I treat her like a normal kid. television appearances that we We make sure she has structure should look out for? in her day, does her homework QW: “Annie” came out on DVD and her chores, has time to have and Blu-Ray on March 17. Later fun and experience life like every this year, I have two new mov- other kid. No matter how busy ies coming out, Kahlil Gibran’s we get, we make it work. At the “The Prophet” and “Fathers and end of the day, she’s just like any Daughters.” daughter. She’s just been blessed Digital SJ: What are some of your hob- to have an amazing opportunity, bies when you’re not acting? and I want to continue to encour- QW: When I’m not acting, I love age her to just do her best. spending my time playing sports, SJ: What do you do to keep especially basketball, volleyball, your daughter grounded while and cheerleading. I also like read- working in the film industry? ing, playing video games, hanging QW: I think that focusing on CAMP out with friends, and playing with giving back to the community my two dogs. is very important. That is why SJ: What advice do you have I support Quvenzhane’s partner- for other kids interested in act- ship with Kellogg’s in helping give ing? breakfasts to children in need. QW: Acting is all about having As a school teacher, I know how GUIDE fun and keeping focus on your important it is for students to character. If you are determined have breakfast before school. I’m and work hard, you can reach suc- proud of my daughter for helping cess in whatever you are doing. raise awareness for this world- I believe that starting your day wide issue — Kellogg’s has com- with breakfast can help you reach mitted to a great goal. your full potential every day! Shnieka Johnson is an education • • • consultant and freelance writer. She is I also had a chance to speak based in Manhattan where she resides with Quvenzhane’s mother, with her husband and son. Contact her Qulyndreia, about her daughter’s via her website, www.shniekajohnson. career. com. Check it out on nyparenting.com

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 31 ADVICE How to talk openly about elderly care My parents are getting older, and I talk about this with me?” Health am concerned about how my siblings Or: “Would you consider giving your and I are going to be able to take care of “Mom, a friend of mine is in a doctor permission to talk to me and ASK AN them while taking care of our own fami- nasty lawsuit with her brother over my siblings about your health in lies. How can I broach the topic with my their dad’s estate because his affairs case we have questions?” ATTORNEY parents without upsetting them? weren’t in order. I’d really hate to “Can any of us come with you to ALISON ARDEN BESUNDER, have that happen with my siblings your doctor appointments?” ESQ. tarting the conversation with and I’m sure you wouldn’t want your “If, god forbid, something hap- your parents is a tricky thing. legacy to be us having an irreparable pened where we couldn’t communi- S They are already anxious rift after you’re gone. Can we have cate with you, what is your feeling about approaching or being in their an open discussion about this when about being kept alive through arti- golden years. Many of their friends in you’re ready?” ficial means like ventilators, artificial their age-group may be sick or have Once you’ve benignly introduced feeding tubes, or respirators? In what died, and this is a sobering reminder the topic at an appropriate time (i.e., type of situation would you want or of one’s own mortality. It is challeng- not Thanksgiving or Christmas!), not want those medical technologies ing to approach this issue without below are some topics and ques- used to keep you alive?” having some people feel like you are tions you might want to use to get rushing them to their grave. the conversation started — just not Living situations I advise my clients to approach all at the same time: “Where do you want to continue the topic slowly and with sensitivity. to live? Do you want to stay in your Sometimes framing it in a way that Financial and legal house? Are you willing to move into makes your parents think that they “Do you have a last will and testa- a smaller house?” are doing you a favor is helpful. Some ment? A health care proxy? A power “If you need assistance would you examples: of attorney? Where do you keep the rather move in with one of your “Dad, you know, Bob and I went originals? Who should we contact?” children, or would you prefer hiring to see an estate planning attorney to If your parents don’t have those someone to help you at home?” get our estate planning documents documents, ask, “Would you consider Don’t be surprised if your first at- in order. She advised us to let our meeting with someone to get those tempts are met with defensiveness family know where we keep our doc- documents in place?” and resistance. Also don’t be sur- uments. It made me think that I don’t “Who do you want to handle your prised if your parent comes back know where you keep any of your financial affairs in an emergency or if to you a few weeks later and says, documents. Would you be willing to your health fails?” “You know, I had this great idea: why “Do you have a financial planner? don’t we go look at an assisted living Would you like to meet with one?” facility?” Note: this is a much “softer” way The trick to these conversations to approach the assets, as opposed is letting your parents get there in to “where is your money!” their own time, but before a crisis A study from a few years back happens. If they feel they are still in found that almost 30 percent of adult control and making their own deci- children are financially supporting sions the stress of a difficult conver- their parents. Retirement calculators sation can be alleviated. available online can help you de- Alison Arden Besunder is the founding termine whether your parents have attorney of the law firm of Arden Besun- sufficient assets to meet their objec- der P.C., where she assists new and not- tives. This will not be resolved in a so-new parents with their estate planning single conversation but will require needs. Her firm assists clients in Man- multiple discussions over a period hattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Nassau, and of time. Try to involve your siblings Suffolk Counties. You can find Besunder in the conversation so everyone is on Twitter @estatetrustplan and on her on board. website at www.besunderlaw.com.

Disclaimer: This column is provided by the Law Offices of Alison Arden Besunder P.C. and New York Parenting Media as a public service to inform readers of legal issues. It is not intended to advise. Since legal issues vary with an individual’s situation and needs, one should consult with an attorney. It is impossible to cover all aspects of the law in an article. Please be advised that the laws are constantly changing. The content in this article reflects the current law. Nothing contained in this article is intended as advice and does not create an attorney-client relationship between the reader and the firm. Individual consultation with an attorney is required to determine the specific facts and circumstances of any particular situation. A written retainer agreement between you and the firm is required before any attorney-client relationship may be created. Circular 230 Disclosure Notice: To ensure compliance with Treasury Department rules governing tax practice, we inform you that any advice contained herein (including in any attachment) (1) was not written and is not intended to be used, and cannot be used, for the purpose of avoiding any federal tax penalty that may be imposed on the taxpayer, and (2) may not be used in connection with promoting, marketing or recommending to another person any transaction or matter addressed herein. 32 Manhattan Family • April 2015 next birthday, not a chance. ADVICE Although I had been dreading this huge project, my two supervisors and I shared some special times. Mattie and I pulled out possessions we hadn’t seen in years and Jessie had never seen. One box contained How to talk openly love letters and poems I wrote to Mattie before we were married. Jes- sie and Mattie laughed when I read one letter aloud. I can’t believe I wrote such mushy stuff, and it wor- about elderly care ries me a little that I have no recol- lection of writing it. My parents are getting older, and I talk about this with me?” Health Jessie said she could part with am concerned about how my siblings Or: “Would you consider giving your her tiny red wagon. Mattie, Mrs. and I are going to be able to take care of “Mom, a friend of mine is in a doctor permission to talk to me and Clutterfree, said, “We can’t give that ASK AN them while taking care of our own fami- nasty lawsuit with her brother over my siblings about your health in away. That’s where Jessie had her lies. How can I broach the topic with my their dad’s estate because his affairs case we have questions?” apple sales.” Jessie’s preschool class ATTORNEY parents without upsetting them? weren’t in order. I’d really hate to “Can any of us come with you to for 2-year-olds took a field trip to ALISON ARDEN BESUNDER, have that happen with my siblings your doctor appointments?” an apple orchard. I had fun picking ESQ. tarting the conversation with and I’m sure you wouldn’t want your “If, god forbid, something hap- apples with Jessie, and we filled her your parents is a tricky thing. legacy to be us having an irreparable pened where we couldn’t communi- Jessie and her red wagon, which holds the apples she picked with help from her father, Patrick Hempfing. bag in no time. Of course, Daddy S They are already anxious rift after you’re gone. Can we have cate with you, what is your feeling picked the high ones. When we got about approaching or being in their an open discussion about this when about being kept alive through arti- home, we decided to have an apple golden years. Many of their friends in you’re ready?” ficial means like ventilators, artificial sale. We made a sign “Apples For Sale their age-group may be sick or have Once you’ve benignly introduced feeding tubes, or respirators? In what — Only 25 cents.” Jessie loaded her died, and this is a sobering reminder the topic at an appropriate time (i.e., type of situation would you want or apples into her little red wagon and of one’s own mortality. It is challeng- not Thanksgiving or Christmas!), not want those medical technologies set up shop with her newly acquired ing to approach this issue without below are some topics and ques- used to keep you alive?” red and green inventory. I cleared a having some people feel like you are tions you might want to use to get Hoarding small bookshelf in our guest room rushing them to their grave. the conversation started — just not Living situations and it made a perfect display for Jes- I advise my clients to approach all at the same time: “Where do you want to continue sie’s merchandise. We had so much the topic slowly and with sensitivity. to live? Do you want to stay in your fun selling and buying apples, learn- Sometimes framing it in a way that Financial and legal house? Are you willing to move into ing about money, giving change, and makes your parents think that they “Do you have a last will and testa- a smaller house?” talking about how to run a success- are doing you a favor is helpful. Some ment? A health care proxy? A power “If you need assistance would you ful business that we repeated the examples: of attorney? Where do you keep the rather move in with one of your memories process after Halloween with Jes- “Dad, you know, Bob and I went originals? Who should we contact?” children, or would you prefer hiring sie’s trick-or-treat candy. to see an estate planning attorney to If your parents don’t have those someone to help you at home?” Okay, besides attempting to tackle My most sentimental moment get our estate planning documents documents, ask, “Would you consider Don’t be surprised if your first at- Cleaning the CHerisH THe this project with two supervisors came when I pulled a sign away from in order. She advised us to let our meeting with someone to get those tempts are met with defensiveness MoMenTs — yes, Mattie also likes to lead — the wall and found half of a pink, family know where we keep our doc- documents in place?” and resistance. Also don’t be sur- garage leads I knew our different personalities plastic Easter egg. Jessie hid plastic uments. It made me think that I don’t “Who do you want to handle your prised if your parent comes back would enter into play. There’s Mr. eggs long after Easter had ended. To know where you keep any of your financial affairs in an emergency or if to you a few weeks later and says, By Patrick HemPfing Sentimental (me). I know Jessie can’t make hide and seek last longer, she documents. Would you be willing to your health fails?” “You know, I had this great idea: why to a trip down use her pink ball glove anymore, split each egg in half. I, Mr. Sentimen- “Do you have a financial planner? don’t we go look at an assisted living et’s clean out the garage but we have to keep it forever. Then tal, said, “Oh, I’m keeping this.” Of Would you like to meet with one?” facility?” memory lane today.” How did this there’s Mrs. Clutterfree (Mattie). “We course, Mrs. Clutterfree’s immediate Note: this is a much “softer” way The trick to these conversations “L statement come from my haven’t used it in the last five years. response was, “Trash!” Now, I admit, to approach the assets, as opposed is letting your parents get there in mouth? If I had typed these words, Take it to Goodwill.” Finally, there’s a half of a plastic egg covered with to “where is your money!” their own time, but before a crisis I could have highlighted the sen- Miss Open Every Box. “What’s in dust and spider webs doesn’t make A study from a few years back happens. If they feel they are still in tence and pressed the delete key that box? Let’s pull that box down.” the best keepsake, but I’m not a found that almost 30 percent of adult control and making their own deci- before anyone saw it. However, like We weren’t into the cleaning proj- hoarder. Okay, maybe I’m a hoarder children are financially supporting sions the stress of a difficult conver- all words, once they’re spoken in ect very long before I concluded that of memories. their parents. Retirement calculators sation can be alleviated. front of witnesses, you can’t take a trip to the dentist for a root canal The garage cleanup will probably available online can help you de- Alison Arden Besunder is the founding them back. Mattie, my wife, quickly would have been more fun. take several more days. Will I find termine whether your parents have attorney of the law firm of Arden Besun- seconded the idea as this project At day’s end, I was pleased with the other half of the pink egg? Mattie sufficient assets to meet their objec- der P.C., where she assists new and not- had been on my Honey-Do list for the progress my two supervisors and better hope not, because if I do, I’m tives. This will not be resolved in a so-new parents with their estate planning quite some time. Jessie, my 9-year- I had made. The car would have to saving it. I’ll store it in Jessie’s tiny single conversation but will require needs. Her firm assists clients in Man- old daughter, made it unanimous. stay parked in the driveway for the red wagon. multiple discussions over a period hattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Nassau, and I then pointed out what I saw as night as the garage floor was covered Until next month, remember to of time. Try to involve your siblings Suffolk Counties. You can find Besunder the most likely problem in tackling with everything, but family harmony cherish the moments. Happy Easter. in the conversation so everyone is on Twitter @estatetrustplan and on her this massive project — too many is more important. Overall, though, Patrick Hempfing had a 20-year-long on board. website at www.besunderlaw.com. supervisors. I emphasized, “We can I thought we worked well as a team. professional career in finance before only have one supervisor!” Jessie’s Did we have differences of opinion? he became a father at age 44. He is Disclaimer: This column is provided by the Law Offices of Alison Arden Besunder P.C. and New York Parenting Media as a public service to inform readers of legal issues. It is not intended to advise. Since legal issues vary with an individual’s situation and needs, one should consult with an attorney. It is impossible to cover all aspects of the law in an article. Please be advised that the laws are constantly changing. The content in this article reflects the current law. Nothing contained hand shot up from the kitchen table, Yes. Did I go to bed exhausted? You now a full-time husband, stay-at-home in this article is intended as advice and does not create an attorney-client relationship between the reader and the firm. Individual consultation with an attorney is required to determine the specific facts and circumstances of any particular situ- at which point I realized I either need bet. Will I get to be the supervisor for dad, and writer. Follow him at www. ation. A written retainer agreement between you and the firm is required before any attorney-client relationship may be created. Circular 230 Disclosure Notice: To ensure compliance with Treasury Department rules governing tax practice, we to raise my hand faster or yell “me” day two of garage cleaning? Like Jes- facebook.com/patricklhempfing and on inform you that any advice contained herein (including in any attachment) (1) was not written and is not intended to be used, and cannot be used, for the purpose of avoiding any federal tax penalty that may be imposed on the taxpayer, and (2) may not be used in connection with promoting, marketing or recommending to another person any transaction or matter addressed herein. when I end select sentences. sie’s odds of getting a horse for her Twitter @PatrickHempfing. April 2015 • Manhattan Family 33 Parenting Tips and techniques for communicating Each generation responds to different approaches

was flying back to New York this Dear past week and ended up seated Dr. Karyn I behind a family whose parents unfortunately had fully lost control of Dr. Karyn GorDon their kids (I’m sure we’ve all experienced similar situations before!). As I watched these parents try to communicate to their 4-year-old daughter with reason and empathy (they had big hearts) to stop the screaming, the child went further into hysteria and eventually the parents just gave up! Passengers quickly got out their headphones to drown out the screaming for the one-hour flight. And as I was sitting there, thinking about how each passenger was feeling (including the parents and their children!), I realized that if the parents had just a little more information about their child’s developmental abilities they would likely have gained a different response. Yes, small children need empathy, but they also really need firmness! That age doesn’t tend to respond well to reason alone. Empa- thy without a firm approach means a child will walk all over her parents. But the opposite is also dangerous motivate all generations at home and ing what you are communicating rel- — if parents are too firm without work,” email my assistant, kay@dk- evant! If you want to communicate empathy, a child will often shut down leadership.org to send it to you. more effectively to Generations Y and cut-off from her parents. It truly Let’s be honest — communication and Z, here are some other tips that comes down to striking the right bal- seems easy in theory until people will connect to their values! ance between being firm and empa- start practicing it, and only then Explain why in advance thetic that I find makes the difference do they realize how many ways it Remember that this generation is for effective communication in con- can go sideways! As I’ve said many constantly asking why. Why should flict; not just with kids but also with times before, the secret to motivat- they make their bed? It will just get students, clients, and employees. ing, engaging, and now communi- messy again tonight. Why is it a big This month I promised you some cating effectively to all generations deal if they are late? Why should tips on how to communicate effec- is to understand your audience! So they ask for help? Why should they tively to each generation, and one of whether you have a 16-year old son get a mentor? Why should they go the biggest keys to doing this is to (Gen Z), 25-year-old employee (Gen to university or college if they just truly understand where your audi- Y), or a 61-year-old boss (Boomer), want to start their own business? A ence is coming from! As I’ve already these simple tips will help you focus great speaker, teacher, and parent shared with you as part of this series, on what is truly the most effective knows what her audience is thinking each generation is unique and values way to reach them! and answering the “whys” before he different things in their communica- even asks. tion. So if we know what they need, Communication tips to Give feedback aLL THE TIME! it becomes much simpler to connect reach gens Y and Z Traditional performance reviews to them. It’s like getting the answers I’ve talked about the importance do not work for this generation (if to an exam in advance — it’s not of speed for both of these genera- you haven’t already figured that out, that hard as long as we are open to tions, this includes everything from you will soon enough). Performance learning! If you missed “Engage and technology to talking fast and mak- reviews are very outdated for a gen-

34 Manhattan Family • April 2015 eration that wants and needs feed- — be early! Lateness equates to Parenting back constantly! For organizations, disrespect! try using more updated technology Are you a mom who programs with groups like Sales- Communication tips force. For parents, make feedback a to reach Boomers daily habit (I’m not kidding), letting and traditionalists wants to make money? each other know what you liked, Say thank-you OFTEN Tips and techniques and what you didn’t! Keep it light, Voicing gratitude is always a but try to make it part of your ev- great habit to get into! Research eryday family and work culture. tells us that people who not only We Want you Be affirming and firm are thankful, but voice their grati- for communicating This generation is used to hear- tude — and they are happier, more ing a lot of praise. Don’t give fake likely to get promoted, more physi- to join our team. praise (they are very intuitive and cally resilient, and people want to Each generation responds to different approaches will pick it out quickly). But when help them more! Look for oppor- We are looking for a you see them doing something tunities to say thank-you (again, motivated candidate. was flying back to New York this well, tell them! They will be more it must be genuine) to all Boom- Dear past week and ended up seated motivated to listen when they know ers and traditionalists in your life no sales experience Dr. Karyn I behind a family whose parents first what they are doing well! But whether it’s a parent, a colleague, necessary, but a car and unfortunately had fully lost control of as I shared at the beginning, you’ll or an employer! One of my former liking people is a must! Dr. Karyn GorDon their kids (I’m sure we’ve all experi- need to be firm as well around coaching clients set out to make enced similar situations before!). As certain policies! If you need this a habit of voicing 10 “thank yous” Full benefits, salary and I watched these parents try to com- generation to be on time, tell them every day. Once she started she commission. municate to their 4-year-old daughter (firm) but communicate it with a lot found she was saying it up to 20 with reason and empathy (they had of praise (affirming) and you’ll find times daily and people around her big hearts) to stop the screaming, they listen better! And for anyone were more eager to help her be- Email resumes to [email protected] the child went further into hysteria who thinks that praise is a waste cause they felt appreciated! or call Tina at 718-260-8336 and eventually the parents just gave of time (see, I’m thinking about my Turn off your technology up! Passengers quickly got out their audience), yes, it will take time, When you are communicating headphones to drown out the scream- but it will actually save you time to this generation, either put your ing for the one-hour flight. And as I since they will actually listen more technology away or turn it off so was sitting there, thinking about how to you, and you will find yourself you’re not distracted. While using each passenger was feeling (includ- repeating yourself less! technology is like breathing for ing the parents and their children!), younger generations, others will I realized that if the parents had just Communication tips view it as a massive sign of imma- a little more information about their to reach Gen X turity and disrespect if you use it child’s developmental abilities they Gen-Xers love independence, it in front of them. From dinner table would likely have gained a different truly is one of their highest values. conversations with the family to response. Yes, small children need These tips highlight ways to com- job interviews (yes, a recent sur- Private/Independent empathy, but they also really need municate effectively with them by vey said a high percentage of peo- firmness! That age doesn’t tend to recognizing this! ple would still look at their phone respond well to reason alone. Empa- Don’t be needy during an interview!) to your day- School Guide thy without a firm approach means If you have a Gen X parent, em- job, turn off your technology when a child will walk all over her parents. ployer, employee, teacher, or col- communicating to this generation. But the opposite is also dangerous motivate all generations at home and ing what you are communicating rel- league, understand that he wants to Honor their experience — if parents are too firm without work,” email my assistant, kay@dk- evant! If you want to communicate see you be independent! They are Yes, younger generations are empathy, a child will often shut down leadership.org to send it to you. more effectively to Generations Y used to giving out jobs and expect- often faster at technology, but and cut-off from her parents. It truly Let’s be honest — communication and Z, here are some other tips that ing that it will be done. They won’t nothing compares to years of expe- comes down to striking the right bal- seems easy in theory until people will connect to their values! tend to do regular check-ups (that’s rience. If you want to communicate ance between being firm and empa- start practicing it, and only then Explain why in advance not their style) and they can’t stand effectively with these generations, thetic that I find makes the difference do they realize how many ways it Remember that this generation is micro-managing. Try your very ask about their life, career journey, for effective communication in con- can go sideways! As I’ve said many constantly asking why. Why should best, and if you need help, ask for it failures and successes, what they flict; not just with kids but also with times before, the secret to motivat- they make their bed? It will just get — but first try to do it on your own! would have done differently, and students, clients, and employees. ing, engaging, and now communi- messy again tonight. Why is it a big Ask, don’t tell their advice to the next generation. This month I promised you some cating effectively to all generations deal if they are late? Why should If you need something from a By asking them about their story, tips on how to communicate effec- is to understand your audience! So they ask for help? Why should they Gen X, ask, don’t tell him! Listen to and learning from them, you honor tively to each generation, and one of whether you have a 16-year old son get a mentor? Why should they go the difference: “Mom can I go to my their experience, and they will feel the biggest keys to doing this is to (Gen Z), 25-year-old employee (Gen to university or college if they just friend’s house?” versus “Mom, I’m respected! truly understand where your audi- Y), or a 61-year-old boss (Boomer), want to start their own business? A going to my friend’s house.” “Boss, Dr. Karyn Gordon is one of North ence is coming from! As I’ve already these simple tips will help you focus great speaker, teacher, and parent can I take Friday off?” versus “Boss, America’s leading relationship and shared with you as part of this series, on what is truly the most effective knows what her audience is thinking I can’t work on Friday.” Do this even parenting experts. She is a regular each generation is unique and values way to reach them! and answering the “whys” before he if you think you already know the contributor to “Good Morning Amer- different things in their communica- even asks. answer — when people ask, it is in- ica,” founder of dk Leadership, best- tion. So if we know what they need, Communication tips to Give feedback aLL THE TIME! terpreted as a sign of respect! selling author of “Dr. Karyn’s Guide it becomes much simpler to connect reach gens Y and Z Traditional performance reviews Be early To The Teen Years” (Harper Collins), to them. It’s like getting the answers I’ve talked about the importance do not work for this generation (if Gen X grew up in a generation and motivational speaker to a quarter to an exam in advance — it’s not of speed for both of these genera- you haven’t already figured that out, when punctuality was highly noted. of a million people. Visit her at www. that hard as long as we are open to tions, this includes everything from you will soon enough). Performance So if you’re trying to connect to a dkleadership.org and on Twitter: @ Check it out on NYParenting.com learning! If you missed “Engage and technology to talking fast and mak- reviews are very outdated for a gen- Gen-Xer, don’t aim to be on time DrKarynGordon.

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 35 Advice Kids and attention To children, all attention parents pay is good

ids love attention. To your little one any attention is good K attention. If you’re looking at her, then she’s happy! If you are talking to her, then she’s thrilled! Espe- Behavior cially since you’re her parent, every moment that you focus on her is one & Beyond that she treasures. Dr. Marcie Beigel You and I have a different defini- tion of attention. For adults good attention is good, and bad attention is bad. You want your boss to congratulate you on a job well done — good attention. Yet you’ll actively avoid your boss if you know he’ll yell at you for a problem — bad attention. There’s a big difference to you between the two situations. Your small being doesn’t see it the same way. She wants you to praise her for doing really well on her spelling test — attention. She’s also okay when you’re upset that she made a mess with her paints — more attention. The critical piece for you to remember is that your child doesn’t see the difference and will gladly accept any attention that is focused attention on her. Why is this important for you to know? Because when your small being is looking for attention, I’ll bet the farm that she’ll find a way to get it. For instance when your small being dresses independently and doesn’t get enough attention afterwards (“Look what I did!”) she may start to refuse to dress on her own again. If you’re small being is feeling ignored at bedtime and is lacking a solid routine, then she’ll start fighting to go to bed so you’re bound to give her all your energy. So many times I find that problem ing to get 10 things done at once, I and there’s no logic and reasoning behaviors in small beings are simply understand. You do have more say in happening in these behaviors. Your ways to obtain your engagement and the matter than you probably know. small being is doing the best she can have nothing to do with what she’s Would you rather put other tasks on to get what she believes she needs. supposedly fighting about. When hold to calmly sit down for a snack Children need parents’ attention and your small being is begging you for with your daughter or have her stage will always (always!) find a way to five more Goldfish, keep in mind that a milk-pouring party in the kitchen get it. Teach them to do it in a bet- she may simply want to speak with while you’re on an important phone ter way! you. Find ways to connect your small call? Decide and stick to it. Dr. Marcie Beigel is a behavioral being in a way that will feels good to Please note that your small being therapist based in Brooklyn. She has all of you. isn’t making a conscious decision worked with thousands of families for It’s also helpful to provide atten- to wreck havoc; your child is not more than 15 years and has condensed tion on your own schedule, this way plotting step by step how to get her observations into her practice and she’ll demand less of it in negative your attention. It’s a subconscious programs. For more on her, visit www. ways. Yes, life is busy and you’re try- operation to get her basic needs met BehaviorAndBeyond.net.

36 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Advice No laughing matter Kids and attention Kid critic reviews emotional docu-drama about bullying KIDS FIRST! FIlm CRITIC mance or comedy or an ac- a real story. I didn’t even tion-packed adventure, but know it was fake until the To children, all attention parents pay is good Jessica Burns has a secret that she’s rather quite the contrary. end! That’s how good of a afraid to share with anyone — except It shows a drama-filled job it is! The acting is truly ids love attention. To your lit- her best friend Brian Slater. For the journey. It will not make wonderful. This is the only tle one any attention is good past year the 16-year-old has been you laugh. However, it may time I have ever truly hated K attention. If you’re looking at victimized by another girl — her for- make you cry. It is about a character (the bully) and her, then she’s happy! If you are talk- mer friend Avery Keller, one of South bullying, which should not then felt pity for her. The ing to her, then she’s thrilled! Espe- Brookdale High School’s most popular be referred to as a joke. director does a wonderful Behavior cially since you’re her parent, every and beautiful students. What can you In the film a girl named Jessica job showing the emotions of charac- & Beyond moment that you focus on her is one do when the world sees the image of goes to one of the best public high ters and proving that bullying isn’t that she treasures. a person, but not the reality? With schools in the nation. After refusing just a normal part of life to deal with. Dr. Marcie Beigel You and I have a different defini- Brian’s help and a hidden digital cam- to let her “friend” cheat on her test, It is a serious matter that has killed tion of attention. For adults good era, the evidence of Avery’s relentless she starts getting bullied. She makes hundreds of children. attention is good, and bad atten- harassment is captured and finally her real best friend tell no one of My least favorite scene is when tion is bad. You want your boss to exposed, bringing both girls and their this. But the friend decides that they the school administration denies the congratulate you on a job well done families face-to-face with the truth. should do something about it. He need to institute anti-bullying poli- — good attention. Yet you’ll actively gives her a hidden camera to wear cies and tries to brush it away as avoid your boss if you know he’ll yell his is a film that is shot to look and this documents all the bullying. nothing. It shows you how quickly a is taking place around the world. The at you for a problem — bad atten- like a real-life documentary Soon Jessica tries to commit suicide, school will try to brush off bullying only thing I would have liked to have tion. There’s a big difference to you T about bullying, concentrating and the movie shows the struggle of as nothing to look out for its own seen in this film is a message at the between the two situations. on everybody who is affected by it. not only the victim and her family, benefit. end or beginning saying that bullying Your small being doesn’t see it the “A Girl Like Her” truly shows that but everybody — the bystander, the This film should be seen by every- is wrong and is no laughing matter. same way. She wants you to praise something that may seem so small bully, the administration, everybody. one above the age of 9. I give it 4.5 out Gerry O. — age 12 her for doing really well on her spell- can actually affect and mess up so This movie is truly emotional. It is of 5 stars because it is a wonderful See his video review at: http://youtu. ing test — attention. She’s also okay many people. This movie isn’t a ro- made to look like it is documenting movie about something we all know be/s_xCEC79MT4 when you’re upset that she made a mess with her paints — more attention. The critical piece for you to remember is that your child doesn’t see the difference and will gladly accept any attention that is focused attention on her. Why is this important for you to know? Because when your small being is looking for attention, I’ll bet the farm that she’ll find a way to get it. For instance when your small being dresses independently and doesn’t get enough attention afterwards (“Look what I did!”) she may start to refuse to dress on her own again. If you’re small being is feeling ignored at bedtime and is lacking a solid routine, then she’ll start fighting to go to bed so you’re bound to give her all your energy. So many times I find that problem ing to get 10 things done at once, I and there’s no logic and reasoning behaviors in small beings are simply understand. You do have more say in happening in these behaviors. Your ways to obtain your engagement and the matter than you probably know. small being is doing the best she can have nothing to do with what she’s Would you rather put other tasks on to get what she believes she needs. supposedly fighting about. When hold to calmly sit down for a snack Children need parents’ attention and your small being is begging you for with your daughter or have her stage will always (always!) find a way to five more Goldfish, keep in mind that a milk-pouring party in the kitchen get it. Teach them to do it in a bet- she may simply want to speak with while you’re on an important phone ter way! you. Find ways to connect your small call? Decide and stick to it. Dr. Marcie Beigel is a behavioral being in a way that will feels good to Please note that your small being therapist based in Brooklyn. She has all of you. isn’t making a conscious decision worked with thousands of families for It’s also helpful to provide atten- to wreck havoc; your child is not more than 15 years and has condensed tion on your own schedule, this way plotting step by step how to get her observations into her practice and she’ll demand less of it in negative your attention. It’s a subconscious programs. For more on her, visit www. ways. Yes, life is busy and you’re try- operation to get her basic needs met BehaviorAndBeyond.net.

April 2015 • Manhattan Family 37 CalendarApril

Just Drop In! at the Solomon R. home. Drop right in at Guggenheim Museum every Sun- Drop In! Sundays April 5 to April day in April. 26 at 1 pm. Tickets are free with Families with children 3 to 10 standard museum admission. the Guggenheim years old explore the highlights of Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum museum exhibits with interactive [1071 Fifth Ave. at 89th Street on the projects led by museum directors. Upper East Side, (212) 423–3500, Then make fun crafts to take www.guggenheim.org]

38 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Calendar St. at Broadway; (212) 678–1654; bankstreetbooks.com; 1 pm; Free. Submit a listing Children enjoy creative storytelling This calendar is dedicated to through traditional tales with a twist. bringing our readers the most Hats, Crowns and Headdresses: comprehensive list of events in American Folk Art Museum, 2 Lincoln your area. But to do so, we need Square (Columbus Avenue at 66th your help! Street); (212) 265–1040; folkartmu- Send your listing request to seum.org; 1 pm; Free. manhattancalendar@cnglocal. Visitors investigate some of the com — and we’ll take care of hats and crowns in the exhibition the rest. Please e-mail requests “When the Curtain Never Comes more than three weeks prior Down,” and then discuss why people to the event to ensure we have might wear them. Back in the studio enough time to get it in. And best families will create their own head- of all, it’s FREE! wear. Registration required. “My Superhero Roberto Clem- ente”: Teatro Sea, 107 Suffolk St.; Wed, April 1 (212) 259–1545; www.sea-online. In Manhattan info/calendar; 3 pm; call for tickets. A bilingual musical for children! Crafternoon: Battery Park City Li- Bobby and his friends discover the brary, 175 North End Avenue; (212) super powers that make this legend- 790–3499; www.nypl.org; 4 pm; ary baseball player and humanitarian Free. a superhero! Children of all ages read “Dinosaur Rescue” by Penny Dale and then cre- Creative Passover Seder: 92Y, ate a playdoh dino to take home. Ballet with Latin flair 1395 Lexington Ave. at E. 91st Street; (212) 415–5500; www.92y.org; 5 pm; Teen Advisory Group: Bloom- Ballet Hispanico presents “En Hosted by Ballet Hispanico’s $25 -$75. ingdale Library, 150 W. 100th Street; Bring your family to celebrate with (212) 222–8030; www.nypl.org; 4 Familia” at the Joyce Theatre on Artistic Director Eduardo Vilaro April 18. and Education Director AnaMa- the members of the 92Y family as pm; Free. they create the meaningful and an- Teens 13 to 18 years old have an “En Familia” showcases ex- ria Correa, this fun, interactive cient traditions with songs, stories opportunity to voice their sugges- cerpts from Asuka, CARMEN. and educational performance and games (vegan meals available). tions for the library. maquia, Sombrerísimo, and El gives families a glimpse into the Registration required. Recommended Beso. beauty of the arts and Latino for families with children ages up to Thurs, April 2 The whole family will enjoy culture. 12 years old. this 90-minute, fun-filled journey “En Familia,” Ballet Hispanico In Manhattan through Latin American dance on April 18 at 2 pm. Tickets are Sun, April 5 Pre K Stories: Bloomingdale Li- and culture featuring excerpts $25. brary, 150 W. 100th Street; (212) In Manhattan from Ballet Hispanico’s diverse The Joyce Theatre [175 Eighth 222–8030; www.nypl.org; 4 pm; Discovery Walk: Charles A Dana Free. repertory and a question-and-an- Ave. at 19th Street in Chelsea; Discovery Center, E. 110th St. and Preschoolers 3 to 6 years old and a swer with the dancers. (212) 242–0800; www.joyce.org]. Fifth Avenue; (212) 860–1370; dis- parent/caregiver listen to stories, and [email protected]; www. do an age-appropriate craft. Regis- nycgovparks.org; 10 am; Free. tration required. the littlest New Yorkers with age- on the challenge. As part of Scot Everyone enjoys a guided walk “Face the Music”: Lincoln Center appropriate themes and engaging Week, bring your kids to dress up through Central Park’s North Woods of the Performing Arts, 10 Lincoln hands-on activities for children 3 to and join the fun at this 1.6-mile run. and learn through hands-on explora- Center Plaza; (212) 875–5374; www. 5 tears old. The event will be staged in three age tion led by Central Park Conservancy groups: 7-10 years, 11-13 years, and educators and Discovery Guides. lincolncenter.org; 7:30 pm; Free. Around the world stories: 14-18 years. Join us for an unforget- Recommended for children 5 years Kaufman’s Music Center presents Bloomingdale Library, 150 W. 100th table race! and older. Programs take place rain the youth ensemble. Street; (212) 222–8030; www.nypl. or shine, except in extreme weather org; 3:30 pm; Free. Nano Days: SONY Wonder Tech- conditions. Fri, April 3 Tots 4 to 10 years old take a trip nology Lab, 550 Madison Ave. at around the world through books, 56th Street; (212) 833–8100; www. Kids Hike: Charles A Dana Discov- In Manhattan then make a souvenir craft to take sonywondertechlab.com; 11 am–3 ery Center, E. 110th St. and Fifth Little New-Yorkers: New-York home. pm; General lab admission. Avenue; (212) 860–1370; discovery@ centralparknyc.org; www.nycgov- Historical Society, 170 Central Park In collaboration with the Nano- parks.org; 11 am; Free. West at 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; Sat, April 4 scale Informal Science Education nyhistory.org; 3:30 pm; Free with (NISE) Network’s annual NanoDays Urban Park Rangers connect young museum admission of $19 adults, $6 In Manhattan event, the Lab will offer a variety of children with nature to encourage children ages 5-12. The Scotland Run: Central Park, exciting and engaging activities, pre- active exploration of the natural world. “When Everyone Wore a Hat” by West Drive at W. 67th Street; www. sentations and hands-on workshops William Steig is about hats, hats and nyrr.org; 10:15 am; $10. in nanoscience and nanotechnology. Qingming Activities: New-York more hats. Travel back in time to an Bagpipes, kilts, and running shoes? Experiment, explore “nano in nature” Historical Society, 170 Central Park era where everyone sported head For the first time at the Scotland and be inspired. Recommended for West at 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; gear, and then make a fancy hat to Run, the New York Road Runners children 6 years and older. nyhistory.org; 11:30 am–3 pm; Free take home. This program introduces Youth Running Series will host an Yippee Skippy Puppet Theater: with museum admission. New York and American history to event for younger runners to take Bank Street Bookstore, 610 W. 112th Continued on page 40 April 2015 • Manhattan Family 39 Calendar Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar

Continued from page 39 sea-online.info/calendar; 3 pm; call For children 3 to 7 years old. for tickets. Known as Ancestors’ Day, this tra- New production re-telling the clas- ditional Chinese festival has fami- sic folktale of Pinocchio from the lies gathering together to remember perspective of a young Mexican loved ones and celebrate the arrival immigrant. of spring. Children create and deco- Interactive tour of life in the rate their very own Qingming Festival 19th century: Merchant’s House kite and hear the story of a master Museum, 29 E. Fourth St.; (212) 777– kite maker in Chinatown. 1089; [email protected]; Macy’s story time: New-York 3 pm; $15 one adult and one child; Historical Society, 170 Central Park ($20 one adult and two children). West at 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; Come tour the house and learn nyhistory.org; 11:30 am; Free with what life was like for children (and museum admission. adults) in the 1850s, from school- From the 17th century to the 21st, work and chores to games and play. through fiction and through fact, Could you carry a bucket of coal up hear tales of the city and the people steep stairs? How did you take a who made it great. Ages 3-7. bath? And penmanship really, really mattered. Recommended for chil- Mon, April 6 dren 8 to 12 years old. Reservations required. In Manhattan Pre Robotics for grades K–sec- Sun, April 12 ond: Bloomingdale Library, 150 W. 100th Street; (212) 222–8030; www. In Manhattan nypl.org; 4 pm; Free. Earth Day – Upcycle Art: Payson Sample projects include an alliga- Center in Inwood Hill Park, Dyckman tor that opens and closes it’s mouth, Inside an ecosystem St. and Staff Street; (212) 628–2345; a bird that flaps its wings and a ferris www.nycgovparks.org; 11 am – 1 wheel that goes ’round and ’round. The Tiny Terrariums workshop crafts. Suitable for children of pm; Free. Presented by RoboFun. Preregistra- celeberates Earth Day on April 26 all ages. Celebrate Earth Day early and learn tion required. at the SONY Wonder Technology Tiny Terrariums, April 22, 2 to more about conservation efforts you Lab. 3 pm. $8 per participant. RSVP can do at home. Engage your creative side and breathe new life into Tues, April 7 Families enjoy a day at the Lab required. reusable items. All supplies provided. In Manhattan and learn all about our Earth, SONY Wonder Technology Lab the ecosystem, and how to pre- [550 Madison Ave. at 56th Street Paper Making: New-York Histori- Spring break crafts: Mount Ver- cal Society, 170 Central Park West at serve it for future generations. Midtown East; (212) 833–8100; www. non Hotel Museum and Garden, 421 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; nyhis- E. 61st St. and York Avenue; (212) Features interactive games and sonywondertechlab.com] tory.org; 11 am; $15 ($20). 838–6878; mvhm.org; 11 am–4 pm; Families will explore, experiment, Free with museum admission. and discover the possibilities of cre- Drop in during regular museum pm. Mount Vernon Hotel Museum org; 6:30 pm; Free. ating their own unique paper with hours and make a 19th century craft and Garden. See Tuesday, April 7. Artist Mike Naylor returns to share award-winning papermaker Mary and play historic games. All ages Sullivan. Paper, in its many forms, is welcome. Family workshop: SONY Wonder the app he designed. Registration required. the material most commonly used to READ with BB: Bloomingdale Technology Lab, 550 Madison Ave. at document who we are, as shown in Library, 150 W. 100th Street; (212) 56th Street; (212) 833–8100; www. the exhibition Chinese American: Ex- 222–8030; www.nypl.org; 4 pm; sonywondertechlab.com; Noon–1 Sat, April 11 clusion/Inclusion. Kids and their par- pm; General admission. ents can bring in stamps, dried flow- Free. In Manhattan Practice reading skills with a li- Grab a PlayStaton move control- ers, string, paper clippings, letters, or censed therapy dog. Enjoy a one-on- ler, pick your favorite dance hit and Shearing and Heather Celebra- other small items to add to paper as one no pressure reading time with grove. Best suited for children 6 and tion: Margaret Corbin Circle in Fort it is made to personalize their work. Tyron Park, Ft. Washington Ave. and BB and his owner Jeff. For ages 5 to older. Macy’s story time: 11:30 am. 190th Street; (212) 795–1388; 10 am; 12; pre-registration required. New-York Historical Society. See Sun- Pre K Stories: 4 pm. Bloomingdale Free. day, April 5. Library. See Thursday, April 2. The annual shearing of the heather Wed, April 8 by members of the Northeast So Percussion: Abrons Arts Center In Manhattan Fri, April 10 Heather Society and Heather Garden at Henry Street Settlement, The Play- house, 466 Grand St. at Pitt Street; Spring break crafts: 11 am–4 staff. Bring your instruments and join In Manhattan in the community parade through (212) 598–0400; carnegiehall.org/ pm. Mount Vernon Hotel Museum For_Families; 3 pm; Free. and Garden. See Tuesday, April 7. Spring break crafts: 11 am–4 the Heather Garden. Come take a pm. Mount Vernon Hotel Museum tour with a horticulturist, win the The concert is part of the Neigh- Teen Advisory Group: 4 pm. and Garden. See Tuesday, April 7. Heather Garden Quiz, hear bagpipes borhood Concert series presented by Bloomingdale Library. See Wednes- and flute. Carnegie Hall Abrons Arts Center at day, April 1. Family workshop: Noon–1 pm. Henry Street Settlement. SONY Wonder Technology Lab. See Spring break crafts: 11 am–4 Thursday, April 9. pm. Mount Vernon Hotel Museum The Pinkertonian Mystery: Thurs, April 9 and Garden. See Tuesday, April 7. New-York Historical Society, 170 Cen- Family Fridays: National Museum tral Park West at 77th Street; (212) In Manhattan of Mathematics, 11 E. 26th St. at “Viva Pinocho!”: Teatro Sea, 107 873–3400; nyhistory.org; 3 pm to 5 Spring break crafts: 11 am–4 Madison Square Park; www.momath. Suffolk St.; (212) 259–1545; www. pm; $35. 40 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Calendar Live in Theater debuts this interac- tour around the 59th Street Pond tive and immersive mystery experi- and learns through hands-on explo- ence. Set in 1875, families will travel ration led by Central Park Conser- throughout the museum galleries vancy educators. Children ages 5 and interact with actors and solve and older. Maximum of three chil- the crime inspired by the criminal dren per parent or guardian. No mastermind El Diablo and the real- groups, please. Space is limited. Pre- live Pinkerton National Detective registration required. Programs take Agency. Suitable for children 8 years place rain or shine, except in extreme and older. weather conditions. Macy’s story time: 11:30 am. Mon, April 13 New-York Historical Society. See Sun- In Manhattan day, April 5. Pre Robotics for Grades K–sec- Baby Loves Disco: Le Poisson ond: 4 pm. Bloomingdale Library. Rouge, 158 Bleeker St.; www.baby- See Monday, April 6. lovesdisco.com; Noon–3 pm; $20. Boogie woogie with some great Tues, April 14 partners — The Jewish Museum, In- quisitive Learning Tools, Happy Family In Manhattan snacks, Urban Sitter painting faces, READ with BB: 4 pm. Bloom- Steve and Kate’s camps with some ingdale Library. See Tuesday, April 7. amazing make your own video activities. Yummy snacks and juice as Wed, April 15 always and the beloved cash bar for non-drinking moms and dads. In Manhattan Calligraphy workshop: New- TAG Teen Advisory Group: Judging Alice in court York Historical Society, 170 Cen- 4 pm. Bloomingdale Library. See tral Park West at 77th Street; (212) Wednesday, April 1. Don’t be late for a very impor- derland,” Saturdays and Sun- tant date! It’s “The Trials of Alice days from April 25 through May 873–3400; nyhistory.org; 2 pm–3 “Face the Music”: The Players, in Wonderland” at TADA from 17 at 2 and 4 pm, plus a special pm; $15 ($10). 115 MacDougal Street; (212) 475– April 25 through May 17. performance on April 25 at 7 Children 5 and up learn the an- 1449; www.kaufmanmusiccenter.org; cient art of pictographs to modern Celebrating the 150th anniver- pm. Tickets are $15 and $25 for 7 pm; Free. ideographs. Chinese characters have Kaufman’s Music center presents sary of the Lewis Carroll work, adults. been around for more than 6,000 the youth ensemble. TADA presents this musical pro- TADA! Youth Theater [15 W. years and the writing of them has duction performed by very tal- 28th St. between Broadway and long been considered a discipline as Thurs, April 16 ented kids. Fifth Avenue, (212) 252–1619 X 4; well as an art. In this workshop, fam- “The Trials of Alice in Won- www.tadatheater.com] ilies will have the opportunity to see In Manhattan the intricacies of Chinese calligraphy Yom Hashoah: Museum of Jew- demonstrated up-close by an instruc- ish Heritage, 36 Battery Place at First Presented by the Carnegie Hall sic folktale of Pinocchio from the tor from the New York Chinese Cul- Place; (646) 437–4202; www.mjhnyc. Family series, this is one of the tow- perspective of a young Mexican tural Center. org; 10:30 am; Donations accepted. ering masterpieces of Renaissance sa- immigrant. “Left for Dead – A Young Holocaust Remembrance Day. cred vocal music. Thirty young choral Come to the museum to remember Take the Stage with Broad- Man’s Search for Justice.”: singers will be coached by and per- those who were lost and learn from way Stars: Carnegie Hall – Stern New-York Historical Society, 170 Cen- form with Peter Phillips and The Tallis those who survived. Open to all. Auditorium, 881 Seventh Ave. at W. tral Park West at 77th Street; (212) Scholars, the preeminent a cappella 57th Street; (212) 247–7800; www. 873–3400; nyhistory.org; 3 pm to 5 Bilingual Story Time: Battery vocal ensemble, in this concert that pm; Free with museum admission. Park City Library, 175 North End Av- carnegiehall.org/forfamilies; 3 pm; also features Brumel’s Missa Et ecce Ages 9-12. When 11 year old enue; (212) 790–3499; www.nypl. $10, $16 $22. terrae motus, Lamentations, and Tal- Hunter Scott started asking ques- org; 4 pm; Free. Carnegie Hall presents this fun lis’s “Loquebantur variis linguis.” tions about the sinking of the USS Enjoy the classic stories, songs and concert where you learn the music Indianapolis during WWII, he never rhymes in French and English. All and dance moves from Broadway imagined he would rewrite history. ages. Sat, April 18 hits including, “Grease,” “The Sound Mike Thornton, New-York Historical In Manhattan of Music,” “Rent” and many more. Pre K Stories: 4 pm. Bloomingdale This event is sponsored by the New Society Curator and naval history ex- Library. See Thursday, April 2. Ballet Hispanico: The Joyce The- York City Department of Homeless pert, will answer kids’ lingering ques- atre, 175 Eighth Ave. at 19th Street; Services for supporting young fathers tions about the harrowing history of Fri, April 17 (212) 242–0800; www.joyce.org; 2 and their families at this concert. the USS Indianapolis sinking. Families pm; $25. will also explore naval artifacts from In Manhattan Excerpts from Asuka, Carmen. Sun, April 19 WWII. Around the world stories: 3:30 maquia, Sombrerisimo, El Beso pro- pm. Bloomingdale Library. See Friday, vide a 90-minute fun filled journey In Manhattan through Latin-American dance. Mon, April 20 April 3. Discovery Walk: Chess & Checkers In Manhattan The Tallis Scholars: Church of “Viva Pinocho!”: Teatro Sea, 107 House, 65th St. Transverse and Cen- St. Ignatius Loyola, 980 Park Ave. at Suffolk St.; (212) 259–1545; www. ter Drtive; (212) 794–4064; www. Pre Robotics for Grades K–Sec- 84th Street; (212) 247–7800; www. sea-online.info/calendar; 3 pm; call nycgovparks.org; 10 am–11:30 am; ond: 4 pm. Bloomingdale Library. carnegiehall.org/For_Families; 8 pm; for tickets. Free. See Monday, April 6. Free. New production re-telling the clas- The whole family takes a guided Continued on page 42 April 2015 • Manhattan Family 41 Calendar Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Continued from page 41 Tues, April 28 Tues, April 21 In Manhattan In Manhattan READ with BB: 4 pm. Bloom- READ with BB: 4 pm. Bloom- ingdale Library. See Tuesday, April 7. ingdale Library. See Tuesday, April 7. Wed, April 29 Wed, April 22 In Manhattan In Manhattan “The Earth and Me”: Symphony Family workshop: SONY Wonder Space, 2537 Broadway at 95th Street; Technology Lab, 550 Madison Ave. at (2120 724–0677; www.shadow- 56th Street; (212) 833–8100; www. boxtheatre.org; 11:30 am; $15 in ad- sonywondertechlab.com; 2–3 pm; $8 vance ($10 at door; $8 groups of 10 per participant. or more). Tiny Terrariums is just perfect to Celebrate Mother Nature with learn about Earth Day and the eco- a with a flowing tapestry of song, system. RSVP required. dance, puppetry and music. “The Earth And Me” inspires children with Science time: Battery Park City hope and empowerment. The chil- Library, 175 North End Avenue; (212) dren learn how they can help protect 790–3499; www.nypl.org; 4 pm; the Earth’s delicate balance through Free. harmony, tolerance and peace. Pre- Bring the whole family to create sented by the Shadow Box Theatre. a tiny parachute to take home and learn why the parachute slows down TAG Teen Advisory Group: our descent as we are falling. 4 pm. Bloomingdale Library. See Interactive puppet fun Wednesday, April 1. TAG Teen Advisory Group: 4 pm. Bloomingdale Library. See “Yippy Skippy Puppet Show” is on an old fable. Best for children Wednesday, April 1. on the menu at Bank Street Book- 3 to 8 years old. Thurs, April 30 store on April 4. “Yippy Skippy Puppet Show” In Manhattan It’s a wacky mashup of tradi- on April 4 at 1 pm. Free. Thurs, April 23 “The Earth and Me”: 10 am and tional tales that are chosen by Bank Street Bookstore [610 W. In Manhattan 11:30 am. Symphony Space. See the children in the audience and 112th St. at Broadway in Morningside Wednesday, April 29. Pre K Stories: 4 pm. Bloomingdale features live music and an excit- Heights, (212) 678–1654; www.bank- Library. See Thursday, April 2. ing puppet show. It’s a new twist streetbooks.com] Crafternoon: Battery Park City Li- brary, 175 North End Avenue; (212) 790–3499; www.nypl.org; 4 pm; Fri, April 24 Free. In Manhattan Lohman: New-York Historical So- First Place; (646) 437–4202; www. Children of all ages read Dinosaur ciety, 170 Central Park West at 77th mjhnyc.org; 10:30 am; $10, $7 for Rescue by Penny Dale and then cre- Cyrille Aimee: Gerald W. Lynch Street; (212) 873–3400; nyhistory. children 10 and under. Theater at John Jay College, 524 W. ate a playdoh dino to take home. org; 2 pm to 4 pm; $16 ($10). Brooklyn band Yellow Sneaker and 59th St. between Tenth and Eleventh 4 pm. Bloomingdale What does 18th-century Tupper- its puppet pals nurture family bonds Pre K Stories: avenues; (212) 247–7800; www.car- Library. See Thursday, April 2. ware look like? How about a 19th- and bridge connections to Jewish life negiehall.org/forfamilies; 7:30 pm; century toaster? In this program, and traditions through performance. Free. you’ll go on a family scavenger hunt Fri, May 1 French jazz singer performs stan- in the New-York Historical Soci- Macy’s story time: 11:30 am. dards. Presented by the Carnegie Hall ety to uncover the kitchens of the New-York Historical Society. See Sun- In Manhattan Neighborhood Center. This concert past, make cinnamon toast like folks day, April 5. “The Trials of Alice in Wonder- is made possible, in part, by the Ed- would have 200 years ago — grind- “The Power Hour”: 208 W. 23rd land”: 7 pm. TADA! Youth Theater. ward Prager Endowment Fund for ing sugar and churning butter by St. between Seventh and Eighth av- See Saturday, April 25. Jazz Artists. hand. You’ll find out how much the enues; (212) 877–6115; www.kidsn- kitchen has changed from 1815 to comedy.com; 1 pm; $15. 2015! For children 8 and up. Long-running Sat, April 25 Watch the city’s funniest teenage In Manhattan In Manhattan “The Trials of Alice in Wonder- comedians ponder what it would be land”: TADA! Youth Theater, 15 W. like if you could control your destiny The Butterfly Conservatory: Raptor nests: Central Park, E. 28th St. between Broadway and Fifth and everyone around you, and ask American Museum of Natural His- 72nd Street and Fifth Avenue; (212) Avenue; (212) 252–1619 X4; www. the ultimate question: what would tory, Central Park West at West 79th 628–2345; www.nycgovparks.org; tadatheater.com; 7 pm; $15 ($25 your super power be? Street; (212) 769–5200; www.amnh. 10 am; Free. adults). org; Suggested admission $22 adults, The Pinkertonian Mystery: 3 New York City is home to an Celebrating the 150th anniversary $17 students/seniors, $12.50 children. amazing abundance of wildlife. pm to 5 pm. New-York Historical So- of the Lewis Carroll work, TADA will In the annual favorite, Tropical But- Rangers will guide you to the best ciety. See Sunday, April 12. present this production by talented terflies Alive in Winter, up to 500 wildlife viewing spots in the urban kids. live, free-flying tropical butterflies jungle. Birding programs are appro- from the Americas, Africa, and Asia priate for all skills levels and begin- Mon, April 27 are housed in a vivarium that ap- ners are welcome. Bring a pair of Sun, April 26 In Manhattan proximates their natural habitat, in- binoculars or ask a Ranger to borrow In Manhattan Pre Robotics for Grades K–Sec- cludes live flowering plants that serve a pair. Children’s Concert: Museum of ond: 4 pm. Bloomingdale Library. as nectar sources, and features con- At the Kids’ Table with Sarah Jewish Heritage, 36 Battery Place at See Monday, April 6. trolled artificial light, temperature, 42 Manhattan Family • April 2015 Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Calendar and humidity. through exciting activities and gallery tours focusing on themes inspired by Exhibition: Freedom Journey 1965: to our special exhibitions. New-York Historical Society, 170 Cen- tral Park West at 77th Street; (212) Just Drop In: Solomon R. Guggen- 873–3400; nyhistory.org; Daily, 10 heim Museum, 1071 Fifth Ave. at am–6 pm; Now – Sun, April 19; $19 89th Street; (212) 423–3500; www. adults, $6 children ages 5-12. guggenheim.org; Sunday, April 5, 1 This exhibit features the stunning pm; Sunday, April 12, 1 pm; Sunday, and historic photographs of Stephen April 19, 1 pm; Sunday, April 26, 1 Somerstein, documenting the Selma- pm; Sunday, May 3, 1 pm; Sunday, to-Montgomery Civil Rights March in May 10, 1 pm; Sunday, May 17, 1 January 1965. pm; Sunday, May 24, 1 pm; Sunday, May 31, 1 pm; Free with museum “Jack and the Beanstalk”: admission. Swedish Cottage Marionette Theater, W. 79th and West Dr; (212) 988– Children 3 to 10 years old explore 9093; Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fri- exhibit highlights through interactive days, 10:30 am and noon, Wednes- projects led by museum directors. days, 10:30 am, noon, and 2:30 pm, Drop-In Art Workshop: The Jew- Saturdays and Sundays, 1 pm, Now ish Museum, 1109 Fifth Ave. at 92nd – Sun, June 28; $10; $7 children un- St.; (212) 423–3200; thejewishmu- der 12. seum.org; Sundays, 1 – 4 pm, Now This fresh retelling of the Swed- – Thurs, May 28; Free with museum ish Cottage original production takes admission. Jack on an enchanting adventure up Children, ages 3 and up, paint, a magical beanstalk. Jack encounters draw, sculpt, or craft a work of art the notorious Giant, Milford, whose inspired by exhibitions on view. Proj- thieving ways have brought mis- ects explore new themes each week. fortune upon Jack and his mother, Jazz For Kids: Jazz Standard, 116 E. but with help from friends, he risks 27th St. at Park Avenue South; (212) his life to take back what the Giant 576–2232; www.jazzstandard.com; stole. Sundays, 2–3 pm, Now – Sun, May Pixelated, Sum of its Pieces: 17; Free, guests may give a $5 dona- Children’s Museum of the Arts, 103 tion that benefits the Jazz Standard Charlton St. at Hudson Street; (212) Discovery Program. 274–0986; www.cmany.org; Mon- The talented children’s musicians days and Wednesdays, Noon–5 pm, of the The Jazz Standard Youth Or- Thursdays and Fridays, Noon–6 pm, chestra perform every Sunday. Saturdays and Sundays, 10 am–5 pm, Now – Sun, May 3; Free with $11 mu- “The Trials of Alice in Wonder- seum admission. land”: TADA! Youth Theater, 15 W. This exhibition brings together 28th St. between Broadway and Fifth emerging and mid-career artists Avenue; (212) 252–1619 X4; www. whose work explores different means tadatheater.com; Saturdays and Sun- The earth on stage days, 2 pm and 4 pm, Sat, April 25 – of perception and brings together Sun, May 17; $15 ($25 adults). visual artists whose works explore Celebrate Mother Nature with peace. Celebrating the 150th anniversary of the intersection between art and a production of the “Earth and “The Earth and Me” on April technology. the Lewis Carroll work, TADA will pres- Me” at Symphony Space on April 29 and 30. Showtime April 29 at ent this production by talented kids. Storytime: Museum of Jew- 29 and 30. 11:30 am and on April 28 at 10 am ish Heritage, 36 Battery Place at The Shadow Box Theter pres- and 11:30 am. Tickets are $15 in Further Afield First Place; (646) 437–4202; www. ents this performance that is a advance, $10 at the door, and $8 Science Playground: New York mjhnyc.org; Wednesday, April 1, flowing tapestry of song, dance, for groups of 10 or more. Hall of Science, 47-01 111th St., 3:30 pm; Wednesday, April 15, 3:30 Queens; (718) 699–0005 X 353; puppetry, and music in which Symphony Space [2537 Broad- pm; Wednesday, May 6, 3:30 pm; www.nyscience.org; Weekdays, Wednesday, May 20, 3:30 pm; Free. children learn how to help to pro- way at 95th Street on the Upper West 9:30 am–5 pm, Saturdays and Sun- Drop-in program warm, whimsical tect the Earth’s delicate balance Side, (212) 724–0677; www.shadow- days, 10 am–6 pm,; $5plus museum tales about traditions, holidays, and through harmony, tolerance, and boxtheatre.org]. admission. families from some of today’s best Children are encouraged to ex- storybooks for children ages 0-4. plore science through slides, see- Free Baby/Toddler Class: Fran- tory.org; Daily, 11:30 am, Fri, April Sport program for children 6 to 21 saws, climbing webs, a water play ciscan Community Center, 214 W. 3 – Sun, April 12; Free with museum years old with physical disabilities. area, sand boxes, and more, weather 97th St. between Broadway and admission. Learn to play wheelchair basketball permitting. Amsterdam Avenue; (212) 932–8040 Take the whole day to explore the with the New York Rollin’ Fury, sport- From Here to There: Brooklyn X 38; [email protected]; Tuesdays chairs are available if needed. galleries and have fun with history. Children’s Museum, 145 Brooklyn and Thursdays, 10 am–noon, Now – Sunday Art Discoveries: The Ave. at St. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; Thurs, April 30; Free. Youth Wheelchair Basketball: Jewish Museum, 1109 Fifth Ave. at (718) 735–4400; www.brooklynkids. Socialization, early literacy, singing, Chelsea Recreation Center, 430 W. 92nd St.; (212) 423–3200; thejew- org; Tuesdays – Sundays, 10 am–5 movement and explorative play. 25th St. at Tenth Avenue; (212) 255– ishmuseum.org; Sundays, 11:30 am pm, Now – Sun, May 10; Free with Vacation week: New-York Histori- 3705; Sundays, 11 am–1 pm, Now – – 12:30 pm, Now – Sun, May 17; Free museum admission. cal Society, 170 Central Park West at Sun, April 26; Free with NYC center with museum admission. This innovative exhibit teaches the 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; nyhis- membership. Children engage with works of art Continued on page 44 April 2015 • Manhattan Family 43 Calendar Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar

Continued from page 43 science of how things move by land, sea and air. Visitors can heat up and launch a hot air balloon, operate an authentic canal lock system to move a boat and experiment with pneu- matics, pulleys, hydraulics, and levers to move objects mechanically. “Galapagos – Nature’s Wonder- land in 3D”: New York Hall of Sci- ence, 47-01 111th St., Queens; (718) 699–0005 X 353; www.nyscience.org; Weekdays, 11 am & 2 pm, Saturdays and Sundays, 1 & 3 pm, Now – Tues, June 30; $6 adults; $5 children. In this 3D movie, travel to the Gala- pagos archipelago to meet giant half- ton tortoises and marine iguanas that spit sea-salt from their noses, hunt fishes with the colorful blue-footed boobies, and swim with tiny penguins. Rocket Park Mini Golf: New These teens really make music York Hall of Science, 47-01 111th St., Queens; (718) 699–0005 X 353; www. “Face the Music,” comes to the Merlijn Twaalfhoven and Asha Tristan Perich, Missy Mazzoli, nyscience.org; Saturdays and Sundays, Players on April 15. Srinivasan as well as 17 new Steven Mackey and Nicole Lizée. 10 am–6 pm,; $6 (adults,) $5 (children New York City’s favorite teen pieces by Face the Music “Face the Music,” April 15 at 7 and seniors,) plus museum admission. new music ensemble, Kaufman members. pm. Free. Golfers of all ages can learn about Music Center presents “Face the Their repertoire for the new The Players [115 MacDougal key science concepts such as propul- sion, gravity, escape velocity, launch Music,” premiering the works season also includes works by Street in NoHo, (212) 475–1449; window, gravitational assist, and by composers Carlos Carrillo, Michael Gordon, Philip Glass, www.kaufmanmusiccenter.org] more!

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April 2015 • Manhattan Family 45 HealtHy eating

:EMDJEMD:7O97CFI07=;I*#') The forbidden fruit Memories That Last a Lifetime Food restriction doesn’t promote healthy habits

o you prohibit your child from eating certain foods? D Orange cheese puffs? Brightly colored sugar-sweetened cereals? Candy bars? If you do, you VISIT OUR WEBSITE TO Good sense may wish to rethink your stance. It turns out that food restriction REGISTER eatinG is counterproductive. It makes the Christine M. PaluMbo, rD forbidden foods all the more appeal- TODAY! ing and makes your child want to eat it more. Last year researchers at Pennsyl- vania State University found that preschool children identified as being highly motivated by food showed more interest in and ate more of off-limit snacks than children who showed less interest in the foods. When it comes to picky or tiny eaters parents may encourage con- sumption by telling them it is good for them. Also not a good idea. “Kids eat for taste and satisfac- tion. So when a parent tries to con- vince a child to eat a food using nutrition as the selling point, kids interpret that as meaning the food isn’t tasty,” says Maryann Jacobson, registered dietician, family nutrition variety of food in a structured way on the top shelf of your kitchen cabi- expert, and coauthor of the book and teach them to listen to their nets, do this: Stock your kitchen with “Fearless Feeding.” Jacobson sum- tummy. I stress the importance of primarily healthful foods, then allow marizes the feeding strategy she em- variety and frequency over pressur- the kiddos a reasonable amount of ploys with her children. ing and restricting.” control over what they eat. “I don’t try to push or oversell Does this mean your children are When it’s snack time, ask them healthy foods or try to get them allowed complete access to all foods? to choose between two nourishing to eat less of so called unhealthy Of course not. Instead of keeping items. For example, “Would you like foods,” she says. “Instead, I serve a pop, candy, and salted snack foods corn chips with guacamole or ants on a log or a pear with peanut butter?” When my own kids were young JUNIOR DIVISON: AGES 4 - 8 SENIOR DIVISON: AGES 9 - 13 I noticed when their “restricted” Broiled Sweet Scarletts™ grapefruit friends came over they tended to PreP: 5 min. time to table: 10 min sprinkle each half with 1 tablespoon binge on our treat foods. “Unlike so many of the struggling Serving Size: 2 sugar and immediately place on a baking sheet under the broiler. Broil adults I’ve counseled as a dietitian, I ingreDienTS: until sugar is melted and browning. want my children to eat healthy food 1 sweet scarletts™ grapefruit Remove grapefruit and let cool slight- and be active as part of their regu- 2 tbsp. turbinado sugar or granulated ly. serve each grapefruit half with 1 lar life,” Jacobson says. “Basically, I Fh_lWj[Feeb<_[bZIfehjiF_[h(+AWhWj[J[dd_i7hji9hW\jiCki_Y:hkcc_d]Cel[c[dj tablespoon each yogurt and granola. want them to choose healthy habits sugar IjehoF_hWj[iIed]I^emiM[[abo<_[bZJh_fi9^e_Y[J_c[7JJ7D ments to separate from membrane. Christine Palumbo Nutrition, or Chris@ derful Sweet Scarletts™ Grapefruit www.downtowndaycamps.com | 212.766.1104 x250 | Tribeca | Battery Park City | Lower Manhattan ChristinePalumbo.com.

46 Manhattan Family • April 2015 HealtHy eating

:EMDJEMD:7O97CFI07=;I*#') The forbidden fruit Memories That Last a Lifetime Food restriction doesn’t promote healthy habits o you prohibit your child from eating certain foods? D Orange cheese puffs? Brightly colored sugar-sweetened cereals? Candy bars? If you do, you VISIT OUR WEBSITE TO Good sense may wish to rethink your stance. It turns out that food restriction REGISTER eatinG is counterproductive. It makes the Christine M. PaluMbo, rD forbidden foods all the more appeal- TODAY! ing and makes your child want to eat it more. Last year researchers at Pennsyl- vania State University found that preschool children identified as being highly motivated by food showed more interest in and ate more of off-limit snacks than children who showed less interest in the foods. When it comes to picky or tiny eaters parents may encourage con- sumption by telling them it is good for them. Also not a good idea. “Kids eat for taste and satisfac- tion. So when a parent tries to con- vince a child to eat a food using nutrition as the selling point, kids interpret that as meaning the food isn’t tasty,” says Maryann Jacobson, registered dietician, family nutrition variety of food in a structured way on the top shelf of your kitchen cabi- expert, and coauthor of the book and teach them to listen to their nets, do this: Stock your kitchen with “Fearless Feeding.” Jacobson sum- tummy. I stress the importance of primarily healthful foods, then allow marizes the feeding strategy she em- variety and frequency over pressur- the kiddos a reasonable amount of ploys with her children. ing and restricting.” control over what they eat. “I don’t try to push or oversell Does this mean your children are When it’s snack time, ask them healthy foods or try to get them allowed complete access to all foods? to choose between two nourishing to eat less of so called unhealthy Of course not. Instead of keeping items. For example, “Would you like foods,” she says. “Instead, I serve a pop, candy, and salted snack foods corn chips with guacamole or ants on a log or a pear with peanut butter?” When my own kids were young JUNIOR DIVISON: AGES 4 - 8 SENIOR DIVISON: AGES 9 - 13 I noticed when their “restricted” Broiled Sweet Scarletts™ grapefruit friends came over they tended to PreP: 5 min. time to table: 10 min sprinkle each half with 1 tablespoon binge on our treat foods. “Unlike so many of the struggling Serving Size: 2 sugar and immediately place on a baking sheet under the broiler. Broil adults I’ve counseled as a dietitian, I ingreDienTS: until sugar is melted and browning. want my children to eat healthy food 1 sweet scarletts™ grapefruit Remove grapefruit and let cool slight- and be active as part of their regu- 2 tbsp. turbinado sugar or granulated ly. serve each grapefruit half with 1 lar life,” Jacobson says. “Basically, I Fh_lWj[Feeb<_[bZIfehjiF_[h(+AWhWj[J[dd_i7hji9hW\jiCki_Y:hkcc_d]Cel[c[dj tablespoon each yogurt and granola. want them to choose healthy habits sugar IjehoF_hWj[iIed]I^emiM[[abo<_[bZJh_fi9^e_Y[J_c[7JJ7D ments to separate from membrane. Christine Palumbo Nutrition, or Chris@ derful Sweet Scarletts™ Grapefruit www.downtowndaycamps.com | 212.766.1104 x250 | Tribeca | Battery Park City | Lower Manhattan ChristinePalumbo.com. In honor of our 15 year anniversary we’re giving away 2 WEEKS of FREE CAMP & other awesome prizes!* Go to www.oasischildren.com/sweepstakeswwww.oasischildren.com/sweepstakesww to enter! GOOD LUCK!

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