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'' BY ROY MOULTON. I DPP VSORRV, »l)T WE HAVE TO ANSWER G*7ouT) /A^l^^OeT^HARRlCD' Written Exclusively for Evening St»f. CD A j /b^ BRST I Hw/tcToet (CLOSE OP NOW, SIR. BY \ WILL WAY *S\R, VOO ARE THE t ( MY TROUSSSAU. Yo3 THE VIChTvANtS*ToAGCTFMA»»!lo -t ALONG ANO HELP /( THIRD -16NTLEMAN WHO HAs I'TIOM TUB IIICKUYVH.I* ci.ah.iox V Sg«T WAY. 1I AM ?i,«aleSL A (OO V J I He SELECT IT? S WAITED fW THAT SAME LADY, Blmer Jones Is dickerin’ with a fe<* j ^- °°MC SACK. ler for a plug hat and there la somn i \ HER/I^ V_J° tuik that he is goin’ into the under* takin’ business. O——O Ami- Hilliker traded off bis cheese an oatmobile and the next, V • factory for V day the oatmobile blowed up. Arne says there are times in a feller’s life when he cnn’t lay up a. cent, O-O The only thing on this earth that will stick closer than a brother Is the screw top on a glass fruit ,1ar. o—o There is several ways to eat sauer- kraut. but the best way is by proxy. O-O f never yit see a woman who would admit that she had anything to wear, and judgin’ by the statues in the mu, soums, I guess In the old days they really didn’t. j o—o The only feat more difficult, than feedin’ red pepper to a wildcat is try-in’ to get a six-inch stovepipe inU a five-inch chimney hole, O-O X see they iutve got ti iiow twii^ trivaiue to put in the collection plat* at the meetln' house. When a fellei • Yours in a button it shoot BX©IDSE ME Myer Noted Women Whose Birthday Is drops suspender By off a pistol. By gravy, if they eve1 .jj — APRIL 15 tried that In our meetln’ house tJ| would sound like a correct ImitatioiW Catherine I. of Russia of the battle of Bunker Hill. i; ! Copyrighted. 1918. CAUGHT 0.\ THE FUV. I] to one member of the new cabj® Copyright by Newark Dally Advertiser Publishing Company a nameless waif of a poor Lithuanian peasant girl, brought up Only a childhood of drudgery In the household of a simple Lutheran pastor net wears whiskers, so the cabinef* •‘Jack Sprat could eat no fat, BORNat without advantage of class or birth in a coun- may be said to be about 90 per centra And his wife could eat no lean, Marlonburg, utterly ' of caste distinction—such was the origin of the Catherine whom progressive and 10 per cent, reaction- I So betwixt them both, you see, try rigid of one of the ablest rulers Russia has ever known, ary. They licked the platter clean." Peter the Great Russia, chose In 1712 to share the honors of his throne. o—o • DEAR was to Vincent Astor lie would like U reading nursery rhymes Davie, who sal on At a little over twenty years of age this penniless peasant girl was sup- says j the floor his arms a bo a but. a news- 1 piazza listening, clasped about a pair of chubby, posed to have made a good match when she married young dragoon. At newspaper reporter, DOROTHYand—don’t it out loud—rather knees. must have say dirty thirty-three she was made the wife of the emperor, and at forty-five, after paper reporter somethin!! You most beside see, of Davie's pastimes entailed a certain amount of dirt, the death of Peter, she was the ruling empress of Russia—holding the high- money. and this he had particular morning been playing marbles, and you all est position of rank and power over an empire of fourteen million subjects. o—o know that cannot has been found one properly play marbles unlees one forgets such minor Anri this is how it happened: After' Napoleon's grandson things as knees. had married her in a Los Angeles lumber yard. He if young Catherine She at once his most in- He was so to became believed to be the member o! busy listening Dorothy that he would not have noticed brave dragoon he was called away to only fluential confidant, and in a few years If they had been black as coal. bride with the kind the Bonaparte family who is not ex- war, leaving his succeeded in becoming Ills lawful •'Read some more," he commanded. "I know one, Guess I'll her pecting to start a revolution In though. pastor, who had brought up. wife. say it. Russian soldiers took Marien- France. .The Of course, no one could choose to "Higgle-dy, piggle-dy, my fat hen, burg soon after and the pastor threw O-O take Catherine as an example, for has been removed "She lays eggs for—for—for—what does she lay eggs for?” ami his on the mercy A diamond ring himself family her which ended In I'M very life, disap- from a Pittsburgh man's stomach “Oh, you always forget,” said Dorothy, "now, try to remember this time. WlFEY- COPS _ of the Russian Sher- ELECTED) [TwflNNfl’YeflTM ¥howABOUTfl ^ commander, shows the BE Ft pointment uiuj dissipation, a he 'She lays eggs for gentle men.' Mnvoa-’ NOW I JOB 2 emetleff. Apparently Catherine for- Being Pittsburgh man, probably for ME POST-OFFICE O of her actions, At the same time "Not but ----- > folly swallowed It so the chorus girl* 'gentle men,’ 'gentlemen,’ corrected mother Dear, as she came ILL TAKE IT EASY •' FIREMAN )1 > <& got her vows of faithfulness to her ) * she had her admirable qualities. She it. out the door with her sewing. — ^ 1 absent husband, and when Sherome- couldn’t get was clever and persevering, and she O-—o "She's so smart telling me hihv^and then she got it wrong herself,” m tielT showed his inclination to admire was, in her own loyal to Peter. sold cried Davie. "I know another. her fresh peasant beauty Catherine way, The battleship Oregon may be. I*t was recognition of her services in for iron. she has always "Dittle boy blue, come blow your horn, took advantage of l(, and. although scrap Well, getting him out of difficulties been a of iron when Sheep In meadows, cows In corn. the other captives were sent on as good piece scarp her wit and pluck that he was in Where’s little boy tends to sheep? prisoners of war to Moscow, Cath- through there any scrap sight. flic Order of Love and Under haystack, fast asleep.” erine remained with Sheremetieff. established O—-“O wom- He ended with a Fidelity, or of St. Catherine, for When tile Southern colonels attend roar. "Didn’t X say it fine? And didn't forget a The story goes that in the slavery en. It was her and pa- White House dinners will hayr thing, did I?” lo which she was now subjected, by sympathy they as much as by her to their of cheer in their "You did very well,'' smiled motlier Dear. Catherine passed through the hands tience, quite carry supply left a beauty and cleverness, that she held ‘‘Only you out lot of w'ords,*' said Dorothy, "now, do you want of several prominent generals of the hip pockets. me the affections of this hot-headed em- O-O to read any more or not?” Russian army, and finally became a "O' peror. Alfred Noyes, the English now course,”'replied Davie, settling himself to listen, so Dorothy opened membeij of the household of Prince plpet in this is said to the book and began again In her pleasant voice: Menschikoff, who was much in the But in spite of all her power and visiting country, have of Probably “I had a little pony, I called him Dapple Gray, favor of the great emperor; but the all of her years of contact with the plenty money. Catherine died un- left it to him. 1 lent him to a lady, to ride a mile away; prince had gained I he coveted young great court, still somebody of O-O Hhe whipped him, she lashed him, she rode him-" peasanl woman only to have to give able to read or write, and in spite the her and she bore A 'alifornia man tried to go with- "Through mire," interrupted Davie, ‘‘I would not lend my pony now her tip to the emperor, who, when lie beauty charms for out food thirty days and now he will a hundred ladles’ hire.’ See, I knew that one, too.” first saw her in Menschikoff's house, through her life traits of feature and have any further use for food "Now, mother, please make Davie stop, lie asks me to read, and •was charmed by her beauty and manner that stamped her as a peas- never in form. then he shouts out every time and spoils everything.” I VE COME TO INFORM cleverness. ant woman of Lithuania. any Davie stood and thrust up his hands in his pockets. His big eyes YOU OF YOUR flashed in anger. NOMI NRYIOIN “What's the use o’ knowing ’em if you can't say 'em," he “t asked, FOR R •on’t care if you never read your old book, and-’’ SECOND "Davie! You must Seen and Heard at Dorothy! overcome this quarreling habit. Why, you TERM? NEW NEWS OF YESTERDAY at little J> up every thing," said mother Dear, "now if you'll be very quiet T’ll tell you how all those Mother Goose stories came to be written." Mow 2'Hour Service Between New York and Phila. Originated the Four Corners Both the children clapped their hands. They never tired of mother Dear's stories. So she threaded her needle, knotted the end, and began. HENRY SHIPPEN HUIDEKOPER, of Pennsylvania, shortly "About two hundred : BY BRIGHT BYES years ago. In old New England, there lived a I IS _ after his graduation from Harvard, In M2, began service In a Pennsyi- woman named Mary Goose. Mary Goose was a nice old lady with several C'jHNERAU* vaula regimct^ and was the lieutenant-colonel commanding the tnoih grandchildren. When they were cross she would rock them on her lap and Pennsylvania at Gettysburg, where he was twice wounded. sing such merry jingles that pretty soon thetr frowns The suffragettes now have a new would all disappear After the close of the war General lluidekoper ws*n in command of the and smiles would shine on their faces instead. idea. go to meetings in a cart National Guard of Pennsylvania and In I <77 commanded the Seventh division They "Mary Goose used to sing 'Iley Diddle Diddle' and drawn by mules. It has been sug- 'Little Bo-Peep' and at the lime of the great railroad riots of Pittsburgh. There he met frequently all the other songs you know so well. And while gested that the inules are a decoy. the children always the lad A. .). Cassatt, who was one of the hief executive officers of the laughed, her son. who wasn’t a real son at The militants thlhk that the men, all, but only her daughter s Pennsylvania railroad. husband, used to frown and say, ‘such nonsense. You ought to be ashamed seeing their own kind, will flock to After General Huidekoper became to be so silly at your age.’ the cart and listen. Not bad, eh! postmaster »t Philadelphia, In issu, "But Mary Goose paid no attent ion and the two. put the mull chib upon one of OOO sang jingles and made up to call Mr. new ones as often he found occasion upon the two “Old as the grandchildren asked for them. And her son trains and then run that A Philadelphia organist In kept make a lo and Cassatt and suggestion train to re- getting angrier angrier—he was one of those stem Puritans that didn't through New York from Trinity" Episcopalian Church in him out of which grew the two-hour believe fun—until at last, to punish her and fet the world know Philadelphia in two hours' time you signed his job because the minister how luxuries and tlie gratification of ex- service between New York and foolish she was he wrote down all can run him to "ecclesiastical the jingles he could remember and had at- economically the rest of the wanted play travagant tastes. It is said to Philadelphia on (he Pennsylvania them printed. train us a way train." ragtime.” The Quaker City must be EVENING STAR ASTROLOGER tract undesirable companions who Railroad. "But, instead of making her a laughing stock made Man General Mr. i'assalt waking up after all these years. they Goose Copyrighted, 1913 exert powers that cause foolish an<1 General Huidekopcr. famous. And that's the of Mother : The Interview between OOO story Goose, as it was told to me beside conduct. r<: Ilzed, was speaking as the post* unwise and Mr. Cassatt fur- tier grave in an old Boston churchyard one of the Huidekoper master of And now Brex lias started a book. by caretakers," mother i stars Uranus in an which Is un- Philadelphia, lie was “The incline, but do not The day is favorable for hostesses, aspect ished a most Impressive and In- Dear concluded as she folded up her sewing. tin ••for speaking for the merchants That attempt at Journalism has im- compel.’' favorable adds to the day's perils, the intellec- “And the mean old son got left: didn't lie?" said singers and actresses. Both social structive sidelight upon bued him with the fever. His latest Dorothy, "that was a I influences of Philadelphia. If their mail from nice 1 entertainment and theatrical events since the planet’s adverse tual ability and the profound insight story. love them to be true." New York could be carried attempt, they say, he will call “Who HOROKCO PE. are to increase the activity through are under the most encouraging rule. supposed Into railway management, which Owes Who in America?” of the mind so that annoyance over in two hours it would prove in many (iardens, cafes and music always characterized Mr. Cassatt. OOO APRIL IWH. fountains, in familiar cases of great business advantage to TUESDAY, 15. trifles and rostlessiuss said: 'T ven- halls are governed'by a friendly star. General Huidekoper Sergeant Tully wants Dr. FWe(j_ surroundings cause waste of line and them. : lure to call upon you, Mr Cassatt, mann to come to Newark. “If ha I’lanet n Now Will Murk The seers predict disagreements, generi11 d issat isfact ion. Mr. Cassatt, however, looked at the to make a which you may he to ifoun* Botli Itrlidit ami Dark. women in big enter- suggestion can cure consumption, ought among engaged The rule is not lor old per- proposition from another point of _ V lucky it worth while to and reforms, but no think seriously stop congestion.” the sergeant dopes prises political sons or for are inclined view. The of the persons who You are now running a possibility profitable at the Four Another changeable April day, serious breach is prophesied. There consider. it out. “We need him to take a gloomy view of life. New York operation of a two-hour train be- which good luck mul bad. with to obtain train front Philadelphia to Corners.-’ brings will be repeated efforts tween and New York Persons whose birthdate it is are sometimes hauling as Philadelphia OOO ,ay lirst real light on this crazi the the inlluenees unfav- measures helpful to women every day futurist, other day. predominating legislative to dur- was revealed to lilin with intuitive counseled watch their hpaltli .as thirteen passenger ears. man shot at was saved "You talk like u cubist,” said the editor. orable. workers and the month will be many A yesterday city have a and accurate Ha ing the coming year. They Mail ears are attached to this train, perfectly Judgment. a of love letters in his 1. "Huh?” the "sob sister." marked numerous incidents that by package grunted Astrologers' find that women are by if did not to or to chance to prosper greatly, they ft at wuy station, it stop figure argue. I am to find out that "Yes, you do," went on the terror of cause discussion. stops every pocket. glad the local room, and I don't public He saw the whole situation at a say it under a double rule that begins with exercise wise judgment in their af- seems to me that could do better for ns a The cubist is of this the you love letters are good something compliment. just about your size. He paints and In the later hours day He suld: “All papa ill omen for all their affairs and fairs. If you were to cut that tra'n in glance. simply right, besides breach of promise suit*. mama and then covers 'em up with a slather of baby's aspect of Neptune is forbidding, since blocks, and tells the Children born on this day will have two.” General Huldekoper, I will give or- OOO janitor it means that to changes to promise of success in it indicates a toward treach- they're going pay the rent." (air tendency ders that there be a fast mall train "I an undue fondness for pleasure. Boys "Your engines are hauling a great The Boston telephone girls have don’t get you," said the sob sister. matters of business, as well as in do- ery and deception. The seers give will be inclined to seek reckless as- with passenger cars attached running them "That's the said the schemers. Under amount of dead weight. Many of decided not to strike. Bet's give point," city editor. mestic affairs. warning against from to sociates girls will waste much have tickets through Philadelphia New three cheers. Now we can get the Ana reciton it is. the rules of ancient the an^ your passengers bought p—-I____ the soothsayers York in two time. I wilt There is a favorable sign for time in foolish amusements, unless in for New York. Tic hours’ cut score from Boston over the tele- About every so often some coterie “Did that configuration was peculiarly threaten- Philadelphia boy say this was a pic- in which are wisely trained. the old train In two." artists or aristocratic professions for who had to they arc inconvenienced by your frequent phone. professional persons get ture of heaven?" asked doc, ing persons anything dazedly. women arc Dancers are at way stations.” OOO loo far away from the good red earth. “He did.” engaged. do with the sick or unfortunate. slops E. ,1. Ail influences. Modern it unwise Here Mr. Cassatt nodded liis head Copyright, Ibid, by Edwards The newsies are giving up their old They lose the tang of natural things. better have under especially auspicious interpretation finds “Well, you'd him locked rights reserved. now. Instead of to stimulants ra- vibrations from the stars to visit or instltu- ns to indicate that he fully vocations peddling They begin crave up before he takes that barn for Since the hospitals public though He Ihe dally “war cries” they are look- ther than food. worship the ex- are to a love of tons when sends forth ad- ■s&wn MOT. agreed with General Huidekoper. They hades on supposed promote Neptune and seta it fire.” | Tomorrow Mr. Edwards will toll ladies with hat- the bizarre. lose it verse vibrations. however, for further explana- I iug for protruding fltic and deify They The old man took doc's advice. It beautiful clothing and adornment, waited, ltbt> lott'aclc said: "How William H. Vanderbilt Changed pins. It’s fc'.50 for every one they their sense of perspective and go mad. is a fortunate time for dressmakers, This sign is held to la- and General Huidekoper is Just possible that a lunacy commis- unfortunate, naLKeaLtKy tion ! "Now if will cut your train In His Mind." have convicted. Easy money. it is sense of perspective that keeps sion will get these, futurists yet. milliners aiid Jewelers also, because it lends to a desire for mucL mLo qouVujife’s V>arl of. you tis sane. No man is sane without it ind no insane man has it. To keep close to the it you have to stay at- round, keep your eyes and ears The mo- oned to natural things. - BY CLARE off the ground you lose YH9RDW1™ nent you get H0ME WBMTED BY R BRBY -_ of fevered imag- our way In a maze a sort of super- nings-you live in rarified mental atmosphere- c ...;-C ,--t 7T-\ rviitaii TH^T WOK»AH? I-0 , *"% .A"'1""''/, 1 irated : another good working HELLO Doc! AM House! no! s«e* Oo *>o Beuae uvJ that’s \ ] i TH& 'St^'mir0 |«A* coccus: l iefinition of madness. SKi, DOC) SEND A [ DARE VOU ? Too 605*1 To