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Issue 932 - Weekly Thursday 12th March 1998 Exposed: Labour’s year-old lie over fees

Money for University tuition to come “from public purse” said spokesman Exclusive media-managers teamed up port. We believe there is a twenty soundbite-filled min- with the Labour student balance to be struck in the utes answering two ques- movement to bring in as contribution to the cost of tions, then left shortly after- Matt Pannell many student papers as pos- higher education, between wards, leaving spokesmen sible, only a few weeks the individual and the public to give answers on more Editor before the May general elec- purse. The public purse specific education issues. tion. At the time, debate on should support tuition fees, Bare Facts raised questions year ago, almost to higher education funding and the individual - in a fair about division within the the day, senior centred on the issue of and much more progressive party, and the lack of spon- ALabour party maintainence grants, and fashion - should repay their taneous questioning in the spokesmen misled students Labour’s manifesto made maintainence costs.” election campaign. Party across the country by lying vague promises about managers ironically offered to student newspaper ‘reform’ in this area. On the Labour has since insisted to respond to this last ques- Editors over plans for the subject of tuition fees, that no such promise was tion by fax. reform of Higher Education though, the education ever made, as the election Funding. spokesman - well aware of manifesto made no refer- At least one aspect of his audience - went further ence to tuition fees. It labour’s policy on higher Editors and news writers than the manifesto line, stat- appeared yesterday that no education does appear to be from University papers were ing that the party believed other paper had approached clear, though. Peter invited to a pre-election tuition should be funded the party at the end of the Mandelson said at the brief- press conference on March “from the public purse.” conference for copies of the ing that “the existing 11th last year, given by When pushed on exactly taped records, currently held sysetem of maintainence Peter Mandelson, Labour’s how - if elected - Labour by Bare Facts, of every- support is a muddle.” There election campaign manager, would be reacting to propos- thing that had been said. was confusion at the time at the party’s Millbank als made by the Dearing about what the headquarters. Committee of enquiry into Journalists had already been Conservatives wished to do Higher Education, he disappointed to find them- with student grants, having In a bid to corner the student replied selves confronted with cut them by 10% for three vote, as well as to try and brochures and promotional years running. Labour has increase turnout among “On Dearing and Tuition literature, rather than since clarified the situation The aftermath: tapes and manifestos contradict one another a year after young (and mostly Labour- Fees? Our proposals only answers to hard questions. by abolishing them Labour’s Student News Conference. voting) students, the party’s relate to maintainence sup- Mr Mandelson spent nearly altogether. International Exhibition goes down a treat

Each society presented their Secretary on all the hard Justin Beavis country, with information, work that they put in and pictures, artefacts and ulti- agreed that it had to be the It’s March 1998, and once mately, wonderful cultural best ever. again we are in the middle cuisine. A superb evening was had of the famous Surrey There was a spectacular by all, especially delegates International Week. On attendance of people to view from the International Tuesday evening numerous the flamboyant displays and Office, who seemed to par- festivities occupied the main President Nevin ‘Bob’ ticularly enjoy the special Union with displays from all Moledina commended the Greek Ouzo on display. the Overseas’ societies. Visitors at Tuesday night’s International exhibition risk the special Norwegian alcohol samples. Photo: Mary Elizabeth Phillips societies and Overseas News 1 n Features 3 n Letters 4 n Music 6 n Entertainments Guide 7 . Cinema and Arts 8 n Union News 9 n Notices & Personals 9 n Sport 12 . ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:55 Page 2 (1,1)

2 News Thursday 12th March 1998 n News in Brief Duke visits James Buller’s Murder victim’s memorial vandalised Students’ Union for the The memorial for Stephen Lawrence, the and covered in white paint by vandals, 18yr old black teenager murdered in a racist police said. The murder remains unsolved. first time ‘in a attack, has been defaced. The plaque at the while’ Eltham bus stop where he died was chipped MPs to vote on Minimum Wage HRH the Duke of Kent, the University Chancellor, vis- The National Minimum Wage Bill will have part of a range of policies which aim to ited the Students’ Union it third reading this week in the House of achieve high and stable levels of growth and last Friday, for the first time Commons this week. Next the House of employment. Together with tax and benefit in years. Some estimates Lords will have its say, but it seems the bill reform, it can promote work incentives and suggested that his last visit will soon become law. Trade Minister Ian form part of a strategy to ‘make work pay’.” was in 1976. He enjoyed a McCartney said: “The minimum wage is display put on by student clubs and societies, and Titanic the movie in 3D even inspected the arma- ments of the Paintball A 14 minute, 3D film showing the wreck of new grey 3D glasses, to create the effect of Society (right). the Titanic has been made by submariner protruding girders and stalactites of rust. Emory Kristof. He said “I wanted the audi- Kristof also helped director James Cameron Fears for his security were ence to experience the Titanic like I have, make his movie, “Titanic” which has high, and his guard dou- without having cold water drip down their become the biggest grossing film of all bled, amid concerns that the backs.” The film uses polarised light and time. authors of the ‘Naked Truth’ were going to attack HRH the Duke of Kent during his visit to the Students’ Union on Friday Photo: Matt Pannell Hackers get in by the Windows him.

Hundreds of US computer networks crashed defence networks were all affected although last week after a “bug” was released via the no data was lost or stolen. Microsoft has Sordid goings-on in Students’ internet. Computers using Windows NT provided a patch to protect computers from received bogus data from the net and the vindictive hacker in future. crashed trying to process it. NASA and US Union ‘Drag Strip’ Crime never pays who can’t remember, here is what you Steven Alexander staff on the welfare stand at the exhibition noticed last November’s use-by date on the looked like. set up for the Duke of Kent’s historic visit packets. Student Affairs Officer Sam Friday Night Out’s are world renowned for to the Student’s Union on Friday found that Birmingham said “it just shows that crime their audacity and perversity. But last about 140 condoms had been stolen from doesn’t pay”. Friday, the students surpassed themselves in the display. The fast-acting thief had not a never before seen display of lechery. If you missed Chancellor’s Bar because you were busy plucking up the courage to put your fake breasts and beards on, then you missed a treat. A lovely young lady and a Guernsey boy cavorted about like pixies on the jive. If you were there, the chances are you were with Union Security, whose pres- ence was appreciated, even if there were quite a lot of them. Drag Night was also a terrifying success, where a vast array of ‘incorrectly’ dressed students danced the night away in true FNO fashion. For those ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 3 (1,1)

n Thursday 12th March 1998 News 3 Where was Surrey Serbs continue on Wednesday? strikes against

What has to be looked at is did the shut Albanians Marcus Mayers down around the country have any effect on Students’ Union the powers that be? What else could we do was over, journalists who traveled to Prekaz External Affairs Officer which would generate more publicity to our James Buller cause? And do the general body of students tell of marksmen still concealed in the care? I look forward to your replies. undergrowth. It is also believed that four The Serb village of Prekaz lies eerily desert- Apparently last week saw the shut down of other villages nearby are still under siege. ed after three days of “anti terrorist” oper- Universities around the country with stu- Representatives of the countries involved in tions by Serbian police. Hundreds of spent dents boycotting lectures. This momentous the UN peace keeping force met this week cartridge cases litter the road. Their spent occasion made at least page six of the to discuss the situation. German foreign AK 47 bullets buried in the walls of numer- Independent. The occasion also caused the minister Klaus Kinkel said they were deter- ous burnt out houses, already blasted by usual problems of millions of commuters mined to prevent “another awful conflagra- artillery shells. being stranded at home for the day and all tion in Europe.” Madeleine Albright the US those normal strike related problems. Or did Secretary of state lobbied for the 6 countries The targets of this onslaught, were the mili- it? On reflection what exactly did happen on to commit more troops to stop the situation tant Albanian Jashari family. They are this momentous day as students stood solid- escalating. accused of murdering several Serb police- ly against the State and demanded an end to The Russian delegation initially refused to men and their informants. 26 of their num- fees. support the renewing of the Serbian arms ber were killed and their houses destroyed. embargo. However, Britain’s foreign minis- However, it is reported that the killing went Perhaps some of the most notable events ter, Robin Cook helped convince his unchecked as police carried out their crack within the South East was a female student Russian counterpart Yevgeny Primakov oth- down on the village’s ethnic population. posing naked outside of Southampton erwise at the last minute. Albanian sources claim more than 80 were Institute in the Daily Sport (officials are The police action also spurred several thou- killed. Men of military age are rumored to still trying to get her phone number). 1000 sand of Kosovo’s inhabitants to demonstrate have been executed while women and chil- balloons launched form Reading University in the streets for independence from Serbia. dren fled their fire bombed homes. Those which would have made BBC1 if something Such marches were declared illegal by the trying to escape into the woods are said to more interesting had not happened with authorities Although no action was taken have been shot by police snipers. Great Western Trains. And Surrey having busloads of heavily armed police were Although Veliko Odalovic, deputy governor their usual Silly night, but starting a bit parked in the backstreets. The tension and of the Kosovo region claimed the operation early. violence of the Balkans is still far from over.

A quick survey of two students found that one didn’t have any lectures that Parking Now Available Wednesday, and the other didn’t go to his lecture because he couldn’t find the right room. Did anyone actually avoid a lecture? For those of us who didn’t know the strike for Motoroycles was on our idyllic lives shot to pieces by the appearance of small posters around campus our motoroycles on campus, instead of hav- on Tuesday night with cutting slogans such Steven Alexander as “£uck the Fees”. ing to park in Tesco’s and walk down”. Now Parking is now available in the University all that remains for the University to do is Where exactly did the Student Union stand for Motoroycles, after a long campaign by provide parking spaces for curs and bisy- on the matter and why was an effort made to the Motoroycling Soc at Surrey. A coles and the whole of student society will advertise this event? The plain truth is that spokesman said “At last, we Oyks can park be served adequately. going on strike had been discussed within the Union some weeks before and voted upon, although the decision was split the majority decided that it was not going to be a success as it was a Wednesday, no one at the time and was willing to arrange an alter- native. However, as could be seen a token group of dedicated students made an effort and something did happen. Women’s Day: the update A motoroyclist pleased with his new parking space. Photo: John Dear

and the Communist Party. March 8th was demonstrations are no longer suppressed by On a lighter note, the director of Miss World Jackie Beer also the date for expressing opposition to police violence and we do not have to fight has had to resort to oferring a donation of Students’ Union fascism in Europe and both were stressed for such basic principles as women’s suf- £25,000 to charity to persuade the BBC or Women’s Officer during the celebrations until 1945. frage. However, women are continuing to ITV to televise his parade! Mr Morley has fight for the original agenda of the women’s even tried to sell his desperately unfashion- movement; access to free comprehemsive able show to Channel 5. BBC stopped IWD did not regain prominence until the childcare, an end to sexual harassment and a screening it in 1980 and looks set to respond here is a chance that for some of you late 1960s, emerging with the new women’s women’s right to choose are issues that to public opinion by keeping it that way. A the significance of last Sunday may liberation movements. 5000 women demon- remain unresolved. sign of more positive times! Thave passed you by. However it was strated in London in 1971, demanding equal International Women’s Day (IWD) and it pay, equal opportunities, free 24hr childcare, was important! free contraception and abortion on demand- International Women’s Day helps to cele- some of this may sound familiar? brate the achievements of women and raise Britain has been celebrating IWD since awareness of the current goals of the 1926, which was also the year of the gener- Since then the celebration of IWD in Britain women’s movement. al strike.IWD was the product of an alliance has continued to grow. Thankfully our between the Co-operative Women’s Guild ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 4 (1,1)

4 Letters/Editorial Thursday 12th March 1998 n Your Letters Think twice on fees Letter of the week - now decided to do something completely Naughty panties must be stopped 4 cinema tickets await author different. Dear Editor, union on FNO’s from wearing such offen- Sir, They want to abolish the maintenance grant. sive clothing, such as the short skirts and That is the crux - not the fees. One third of revealing crop tops which they choose to students will be exempt from fees, and Thank goodness someone had the audacity It is all very well students throughout the another third will pay a “reduced fee”. and courage to speak out against the wear. Since we all know this leads to many embar- country “walking out” of lectures in protest What the Prime Minister seems to have deplorable acts occurring within University against the proposals of the government to trouble with, and what Mr Hague tried to campus, i.e.: with regard to the recent rassing attempts to perform natures mating rituals, which in turn usually result in fail- introduce tuition fees, but they are protest- point out in the Common’s, is that the many pornography case on campus. ing about the wrong thing. students who will be exempt from tuition This has prompted me to speak out on ure due to the condition brought upon by the copious consumption of alcohol. It is unrealistic for students to expect the fees now. But they will have no student behalf of the male students at Surrey, on the taxpayer to continue supporting a higher grant to help them, and instead will be plight which they suffer regularly, even If young ladies of Surrey insist on wearing education system which the majority of forced to take out a larger loan. Somehow, more so due to the uprise of sunny days as people never utilise, so unless we want to the Prime Minister has deluded himself into summer approaches. such revealing clothing, maybe a separate room could be allocated where they could see income tax increased, the logical solu- believing that these proposals are advanta- I am of course referring to the large number tion is for the students who take advantage geous to students from lower-income back- of intimidated and petrified male students flaunt in private without offending the University of Surrey’s male students. So for of the system to pay for its sustenance. grounds. All in all it’s quite a coup for the who fall foul of semi-clad, underdressed Students who voted Labour on 1 May can government - not only do they get some Birds who can be commonly found at FNO the sake of all our students: BAN SUCH ABYSMAL SOCIAL BEHAVOIR hardly complain about this now whilst money from tuition fees, but they also save (and outside Chancellors once it gets hotter Labour conveniently omitted any mention the money which would otherwise be spent !) of it from their manifesto, both Mr Blair and on grants. These scantily clad, assertive, corrupt, Name and URN supplied Mr Blunket stated during the election that The real issue here should be where all of young ladies should be banned from the they would adhere, with Opposition sup- this money is going to end up, Surely it More ‘free’ cider controversy port, to the Dearing Report. should all, apart from the DoE’s administra- Anyone who listened to Prime Minister’s tion costs, go to the universities? This might Dear Editor, local community who seem to suffer due to Questions on Wednesday would have heard not be the case. Worryingly, the matter is the irresponsible attitudes of some both the Prime Minister and Leader of the still “under review” - suggesting that the Last week Nevin ‘Bob’ Moledina implied University of Surrey Students. I propose Opposition arguing over the Dearing government has other plans for the money, that selling 240 bottles of DONATED cider that the £240.00 profit is donated to a local Report, which recommended two main and will either break the news quietly in a at the Charter Ball was a ‘responsible’ act. primary school to buy some much needed points. Firstly, it said that means-tested written answer, or save it until something I would like to suggest that the Students equipment instead of being absorbed into maintenance grants should stay. Secondly it positive arrives to spin it with. Union take this responsible act further and the profits of the Union Club. wanted everyone except the 20 percent least respond to Matthew Clark’s act of kindness well-off students to pay a flat rate of £1000 Yours sincerely, with an act of kindness directed towards the Name & URN supplied per annum. The trouble is that the govern- Simon Ashall ment, having promised in Opposition have Pornography crusaders have their ‘grey M&S Knickers in a twist’ Letters: what’s going on? Dear Editor, issue of personal attack alarms (v. sensible) Dear Editor, many (successful) balls and parties where I but resisting pressure to rush around ripping received free drinks and I don’t remembers Good one Mr H. I’m all for telling looney “offensive” material from workshop walls, I any of them being marred by dangerous for one am glad that they take their jobs In the last issues of Bare Facts, some impor- females to piss off when they rush into my tant points have been raised, which I would behaviour. room and demand that I tear down my Mr seriously. Security, as we all know, have Finally, it does Miss Moledina no good to much more important duties, like clamping like to see answered. Tickle calendar on the grounds that he’s got Most disturbingly, the letter from the deride “the committee” who “organised” the no clothes on. On demanding to know about cars, and can’t be dealing with freaks in Charter Ball in an otherwise well thought DMs and chastity belts (sterling job, Charter Ball committee claimed that Bare my feelings on the issue of respect towards Facts is not allowed to print any adverse out response to the original letter. She females, I’d offer the view that respect is a chaps!). Perhaps security could issue a new would do better to remember who her type of personal alarm that sounds off very comments about the Students Union or the commodity to be earned on ones merits, not Sabbaticals and as such they were restricted employers are. issued on demand to half the world’s popu- loud in response to irrational censorship attempts. It is terribly unreasonable of these from criticising certain members of the lation. As for trying to incite fury within the Union. Yours, L Hill & J Savage student body by complaining to the student young ladies toattempt to curtail an activity which involves nothing more sinister than a I thought Bare Facts was a newspaper for magazine- why have these people got noth- the students and incorporated the notions of Ed’s note - which I know is too long espe- ing better to do? Why do these bored, uppi- bunch of blokes trying to brighten the drea- cially after all the long letters, but there’s no ry walls of their working environments. free speech, comment and diversity. If not ty individuals feel it necessary to encroach then maybe we should rename it to “Almost space for the Editorial, so there you go. To upon other people’s pleasures? Having clear this one up - although all kinds of peo- A grand survey of offensive items could Bare Facts” or “Bare Facts -but only if your scoured the university’s workshops and opinion is convenient”. ple try to dabble with the content of Bare found to their horror that girly calendars are feasibly result in the banishment of red Facts, nobody’s letters are changed except meat, most vegetables and, probably, In the following issue, Nevin Moledina, in in residence, are they next going to launch a her answer to the committee letter said that by the editorial team, and in very limited campaign on all of the boys’ bedrooms on whinging feminists. “Gaylords”, foreigners circumstances. These are: and lectures would also be out. And so any criticism (of the committee) has to be campus, banging on doors and demanding taken on the chin. Coming from someone (1) If they are defamatory. The author, edi- that Melinda and Claudia be replaced with would democracy. In this society, we citi- tor, publisher and printer could be sued zens must tolerate the harmless foibles of who it appears cannot be criticised, is this pictures of Whinnie the pooh? AND what not a case of double standards or, dare I say together if we were to run a libellous letter. about the girls? I bet that more than 50% of our fellow homo-sapiens if civilisation as Libel actions are rare (and they rarely suc- we know it is to be sustained. it, hypocrisy? birds rooms upon this very campus sport the Secondly, I’d like to address the fallacy that ceed) but they can be costly. If we were naked, rippling images of young men upon clobbered for £30,000, we’d have no Bare Have these people read the newspapers it would be dangerously irresponsible for their walls. Should they be hauled up in any licensed establishment to give away Facts production budget for two years, and front of the officials in charge of the acco- recently? Complaining about ladies with no that wouldn’t be good for free speech. This clothes on is so eighties. These days there free alcohol. Is this in the belief that this modation office? Whatever happened to will encourage people to drink too much? In year, only one such letter has been pulled, human liberty? are real causes like child murder and terror- and only after consultation with a solicitor. ism to get your sensible grey M&S pants in that case I can tell you that every time I’ve been to the Union I’ve not only seen people (2) If they break the Student Union’s The very first point that the writers of the a twist about. Talking of newspapers, is propoposed new ‘staff protocol’. This another stage of the campaign going to drinking too much but also that the Union is article mentioned was that the shocking “irresponsibly” encouraging people to drink means that nobody can comment on the per- event occurred last term. That’s three involve cutting the naughty pictures out of formance of the permanent staff at the the papers in the One Stop shop at six too much by not only selling the stuff, but months ago. Why has it taken these people by offering promotions. Students’ Union. The Union, other students, a term to react to their terrible finding? o’clock in the morning before the perverts the sabbaticals, the University, the arrive to buy their breakfast reading matter? In fact, at the Postgraduates welcome to the Have they been receiving counselling for University in the lower bar last October, I Government, the launderette, Saddam post traumatic stress and it’s only now that I would like to propose a campaign within Hussein, and the Charter Ball are all fair the university to stamp out irrational out- distinctly remember enjoying several (free) they can find the strength to talk about it? glasses of wine whilst almost all the sabbat- game. Perhaps Esther or Vanessa could help. Can I bursts. Surely something constructive can (3) If they’re too long, so deprive other peo- be found for these people to do. Don’t we icals were present. Apparently, this is not advise that these plighted ladies check out the first time the Union has given out free ple from getting their letters in. the BBC 2 website for details, taking care to need some trees planting or something? Please e-mail Barefacts with ideas. drinks either. steer clear of the hardcore porn sites that Additionally, I have also seen this kind of Basically, keep on writing - and if you’re they might encounter whilst browsing on interested in what the editorial team does, P. r Groves behaviour up and down the country in bars, the worldwide web. pubs and night-clubs and have even been to join it! 6pm Mondays, BF Office. All As for the security office condoning the students are welcome. ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 5 (1,1)

n Thursday 12th March 1998 Letters 5 Your Letters

Iraq letters are swayed by ‘paranoid propaganda’ of tabloids Leave the Iraqi people alone

Dear Editor, ians. Dear Editor, Well, not only has this organisation failed to keep its promise of fighting for human In addition, if the U.S. and British govern- I refer to the letters on issue 931 about the rights and preventing catastrophic wars, it is In response to Simon Ashall’s criticisms ments are so concerned about the stockpil- (BF letters issue 927) of a previous editorial ing of weapons why did neither condone situation in Iraq. I’m informing the authors under the full authority of the USA backing concerning a the situation in Iraq I would sanctions against France following the test- of these letters that the American embargo every move they make. like to point out a number of inconsistencies ing of nuclear weapons in the Pacific while in Iraq has killed 750,000 people so far, So please understand that no one is threat- in his arguments.Firstly, in regards to the “need to see UN resolutions enforced prop- the British government has sold over 800 most of them babies children and elderly ening you, you will all be enjoying our beers erly” Simon Ashall chose to ignore Israel’s million pounds worth of weapons to the people. This genocide will only be complet- while thousands of people will be killed by oppressive regime in East Timor? defiance of the UN resolution concerning ed with the bombing of Baghdad. The your governments weapons. The murder of the occupation of Golan Heights (a Syrian authors of these letters seem very proud of a nation is something we should be ashamed territory). I wonderwhether Mr. Ashall con- Thus, it appears that the threat of military siders that this could be due to the econom- action from Mr. Blair and Mr. Clinton is their political leaders actions: of -not supporting it. The US and UK gov- ic interests that both Britain and America merely an attempt to deflect attention away Arming a dictator and then revenging on his ernment have no intention of saving this have within Israel ? Secondly, the author the crises that both leaders are currently suf- people because he dares disagree with their world - they can only make it worse. referred to the need for military intervention fering from. Therefore I hope that in the Order. Say no to war -say no to UK-US interna- because “force appears to be the only lan- future Simon Ashall will not be so easily Building the fake profile of the sensitive tional terrorism. guage that he [Saddam Hussein] under- swayed by the paranoid propaganda of the stands”. However, Sir Peter de la Billiere tabloid media. leader who wants to save us from mad (the commander of British forces during the Sadam. An anti-west, anti-British, anti-american, Gulf War) has pointed out that a vast num- Yours Sincerely, Well, Blair and Clinton, when you deal with anti-UN, anti-war student who loves specu- ber of weapons remain unaccounted for and Andy Deegan a lunatic you put him in a mental clinic, you lations. thus the only victims will be innocent civil- don’t take revenge on his family. Postgrads invite you on their riverboat trip The role of the U.N was also mentioned. Name and URN supplied Dear Editor, ure. Sorry, I don’t know anything about the cost of ball gowns. As a point of interest the Security: don’t drag us into pornography row I am writing in reply tolast week’s letter PostGrad Association here has organised a riverboat party for June. from two AMAZED final years concerning Dear Editor tion. I pointed out to her that the calendar their annoyance at the Grad Ball rumours. was not illegal and as such we had no power I’m afraid that I have no definite knowledge Although it is the PostGrad Association that to demand its removal. I recommended that of the price of the grad ball this year except are doing this it is open to any student at the I am writing in response to a letter in last university and we will be happy to have that I heard £50, which is what I paid last weeks edition, entitled “Ban Pornography she spoke to the Students Affairs Officer anyone there who is unable to afford the year. within the University”, and to set the facts with a view to approaching the University Fifty pounds is a lot of money to ask final Grad Ball. The expected cost is in the range straight as regards the Security involve- Authorities if she wished this type of calen- year students to pay out, there is no doubt of £15. We appreciate that most, if not all of dar to be banned. about that and I had several friends last year the undergrads will have finished by then, ment. Some months back 2 young ladies but not the postgrads so as long as you can who decided not to go to their only ever came to the desk to complain of a porno- find some place to stay then come along. Graduation Ball because of the price. Fifty graphic calendar displayed in a workshop. Neither Mr Moir or I said we did not object pounds is just the start! If you had to hire a Tickets available (Right, that’s enough free The man they spoke to took the details and to the calendar, infact we both said that on a Tux you could add at least forty to that fig- advertising - ed) Tony Ede the offending material was later checked. It personal level we thought it inappropriate. Pornography crusaders: look the other way is a promotional calendar of a scantily clad As the letter reads the part relating to us is Dear editor, people are highly disturbed individuals to female which is hung inside a workshop, it incorrect. We actively promote safety, both begin with - to equate a soft-core porn cal- can be seen through the window. directly and through our links with I am writing in response to a letter that was endar with attacks on female students as you Sabbatical Officers. The attack alarms are seem to be suggesting is groundless and published in BF last week - ‘Ban One of the young ladies returned to Security subsidised from the Security budget. Pornography Within the University’. down-right dangerous. I think most of us at later that day and spoke to my Mr Moir, as a Firstly, I would like to say to the anonymous this University possess enough intellectual Yours sincerely Miss ‘X’ (why did she not wish to have her capacity to separate fantasy from reality - result he went to the workshop and asked name printed alongside her views?), how something you seem to be a tad confused them to remove it. The man declined. dare she (and her friend) have the audacity with at present. to march into someone’s office and demand Some days later the young lady returned and A Watling (however politely) that they remove a per- As for your cry “For the sake of all students Chief Security Officer fectly legal item from a wall? Who do you at the University of Surrey; ban pornogra- again spoke to Mr Moir, I was in the office think you are? If it offends you, LOOK THE phy within the university”: who the hell do at the time and interceded in the conversa- OTHER WAY. you think you are to censor or decide on what is in the best interests for myself and Do you really wonder why you received other students? Please do not attempt to dic- such a reply from Mr H? For once I agree tate or pass off your narrow minded views with security - everyone is entitled to their as being representative of myself or any own opinion. other student or member of staff at this University unless you have spoken with us You also wrote “It is common knowledge all. that pornography degrades women and that people are influenced by the image of It is not the University of Surrey that allows women presented in pornography” - would legal pornography - it is the laws of the land you care to back that sweeping statement up (which does not mean they are morally or with something as trivial as factual evi- politically ‘correct’), so take up your argu- dence? Not so long ago it was common ment with the politicians, not with certain knowledge that the Earth was flat and that members of staff who (as with most students you would only contract HIV/AIDS if you I would imagine) no doubt have consider- were homosexual. Get the point Miss ‘X’? ably more important things to worry about What about “Pornography indicates that than a pair of tits on a piece of paper. women are inferior to men and that women need not be respected” - where does that Get on with your own life Miss ‘X’ and stop conclusion come from? Also, are you trying trying to interfere with the lives of others. to say that men who watch/look at porn will be ‘influenced’ to attack women on and off Garry Gulbrandsen campus? People who attack or rape other ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 6 (1,1)

6 Music Thursday 12th March 1998 n

Ordinary’. This is promising stuff. 6/10 lurking under ALBUM OF THE WEEK G.T. the covers. The SINGLES MOVER - Tricolore (Superior Quality) ALBUMS best of the A guitar led, gravel voiced Elton John bunch is proba- PULP - This Is Hardcore (Island) sing-song that waltzes along whilst the LEVERT SWEAT GILL - LSG Amazing. A superb spring bloom of bly the latest harmonies flow. You wonder if this is gradually soaring, understated pop that (Elektra) single Mike Flowers Pops covering Status Quo could easily be dismissed as undevel- Some of the fattest tunes I’ve heard in but ultimately you find it to be just the ‘Overthrown’ oped but overblown Britpop. But Pulp sort of thing Steve Anorak (Lamacq) a long time. I’m stunned. The album which disrobes give you a moody orchestral sounding, will like. And why not - it’s catchy. 6/10 pulls together really well. Listen out the repetition alpine masterpiece - desperately swal- D.J. for ‘Round & Round’. I won’t be lowing you up. “You can be a specta- of other peo- tor?” but you’ll wanna be immersed. CUCKOO - What’s It All About putting down this CD for a long time ple’s style and 9/10 D.J. (Geffen) to come. 9/10 I.U. shows who Classic guitar rock. Hints of 3 Colours RIALTO - Dream Another Dream they really are. Red with a leaning towards Shed 7! The (East West) THE HYBIRDS - The Hybirds A lulling but lead track contains all the pre-requisite Another epic feeling classic from Rialto. (Heavenly) fuzzy guitars with fiddly lead and strong compelling The subtle guitar work and laid back male vocals. Mindblowingly unoriginal The Hybirds give you the impression track. drumming well compliment the distinct but good enough. 6/10 A.T. that every second of every song they Including the vocals. Special credit must be giving for play is something that their life avoiding the strap on strings section and IMOGEN HEAP - Shine (Almo) other singles only minimal brass. 9/10 A.T. Imogen Heap has a wonderful style and depends on. Richard Warren’s exten- ‘Blow’, originality but still has some way to go sive repertoire of guitar styles deserves ‘Supersonic THE BETA BAND - The Patty Patty before being really brilliant. She could to be mentioned apart.. it is simply E.P. (Regal) Daydream’, In be big in the future. Her album, which is Sometimes some bands make it hard for breathtaking, like an early Jimi My Shadow’ released in the summer could be worth people, by being just stubbornly unde- Hendrix meets John Squire. Each song checking out. 5/10 G.D. and there next finable, this second e.p. by Anglo has a different twist that add something release Scottish The Beta Band are one such CHEMICAL PILOT - Astral to the overall effect, making this a well ‘Revolving’. A band. Hailed as one of the most interest- Dominoes (Eruption) crafted, enjoyable album. Well worth ing and promising bands for a while, The beat breaks in sweetly, soon enough very good they’re mates with the verve, they sound you’ll be tapping your foot. It becomes it. 8/10 G.C. debut from this a bit like Beck, loaded era Primals, sec- a bit of a headache when you get to the three piece ond coming Roses sans lead guitar, just third version. There needs to be, I think FU MANCHU - The Action Is Go band form amazing dazed rock mantras seemingly a diffusion point between monotonic (Mammoth / Polydor) Norway, but SUICIDE - Suicide (Red Star/Blast First) about hanging loose and expressing repetitive beats and actual creativity. It certainly seems that 1998 is going to yourself. 9/10 N.W. 5/10 I.U. the only ques- Many people may not of have heard of this band, but will be the year for the stoner rock scene, tion is how have partially heard the effect which Suicide created back THIRD EYE BLIND - How’s It CECIL - The Most Tiring Day despite the demise of its flagbearers Going To Be (Elektra) many singles in the seventies. One of the first synth pop groups of that (Parlophone) the mighty Kyuss. This, the fourth It’s great to be able to be really positive Eighties plod plod bass combines with can be released generation, influencing such bands as Soft Cell, Depeche album from Fu Manchu, looks like it about a group that you don’t know that Bon Jovi guitars to a make a low key of one album? Mode and Sisters Of Mercy in the eighties and now will install the Orange County rockers much about. This is a brilliant single rock song. The vocals are powerful yet 7/10 K.M. Spiritualised. Suicide’s sound is primitive, using simple which is backed with their huge fragile. Unfortunately, after the first at the forefront of the scene. The riff electronic pulses and melodies yet encompasses a stark American hit ‘Semi Charmed Life’. This twenty seconds you’ve heard all it has to heavy sound takes its lead from late group are already big in America and LIONROCK - beauty. Songs like ‘Frankie Teardrop’ shows how power- offer. Directionless. 4/10 A.T. sixties/early seventies hard rock under- are rising in this country. ‘Semi City Delirious fully emotional Alan Vega’s lyrics can be. While the sim- STREEM - Coming Down (Roadrunner) pinning Thin Lizzy-like dueling gui- Charmed Life’ got into the top 40 and (Concrete) plistic sounds of the synth (Martin Rev) blends in creating hopefully this will too. Go out and buy Every track on this single sounds like a tars. The overall effect is not far copy of something else. It is already This album the imaginary life of Frankie. Other songs like ‘Cheree’, it. 8/10 G.D. removed from that of the recent familiar before you have even listened seems to sound ‘Girl’ and ‘Ghost Rider’ epitomizes the sound of Suicide. Corrosion Of Conformity records. Fu WILLIAM - Tired of Fucking to it. Track 3 sounds like a take off of a like so many This album is still as hard hitting as when it was first (Creation) Manchu deliver powerful grooving popular James Bond theme. This single other bands but released in 1977, and is a must for the more avant garde William, as in one of the Reid Brothers annoys me since it is slow, lacking in hard rock and they may just fill the still manages of you out there. There is even a bonus live CD for you to out of the Jesus and Mary Chain. action and sounds like something an void left by Kyuss. 7/10 R.W. Excuse the title, the track is pretty good. amateur would create on a boring to pull off a lap up as well. 9/10 K.M. If you like any of the Jesus and Mary Sunday. It has it’s plus points but it fairly decent Chain material you will like this, if you largely leaves me cold. 4/10 G.T. LIBIDO - Killing Some Dead Time album. They have a tendency to sound Washington ‘s latest talents. Shouty like any American lo-fi stuff you may (Fire) vocals all the way, slightly funky base SOFA SURFERS - The Plan (Geffen) like the Sabres Of Paradise quite a lot like this, if you haven’t then you won’t. At first looking at Libido’s debut as well as Death In Vegas, Massive line and some pretty awkward riffs. 7/10 N.W. The new fascination of the alternative music press is, in my opinion, blatantly album cover you may be mistaken for Attack and Future Sound Of London. However, beware Cannibal Corpse EVIL SUPERSTARS - B.A.B.Y. (A&M) over-hyped. This single is just another it to be the new Oasis album as the The album starts with ‘Push Button fans, the lyrics are pretty light hearted Evil they may be, but superstardom still collection of unoriginal, heard-it-all- similarities are striking, there’s a Cocktail’ which has whispery vocals, and down to earth. 7/10 C.H. awaits. Their stuff is quite good but before, run of the mill indie songs that swimming pool with a house in the lacks anything that makes them stand seem to be spurting out of record com- an oriental type bit and sounds very out from the crowd, but is still worth lis- panies like water out of a hose... crap. background. Even Libidos logo is sim- urban. Next is ‘Rude Boy Rock’ is SVEN VATH - Fusion (Virgin) tening to. 7/10 E.C. 4/10 C.H. ilar. So is there any similarity or is it where the big beats kick in big time To some the guru of techno, to others coincidence. Well, no they are not DREAM CITY FILM CLUB - The HOODWINK - More Millionaires with a great brass bit. Quite a few the greatest techno DJ. The album con- Peel Session (Beggars Banquet) (Mute) exactly an Oasis sheep, but they are in tracks have some laid back but fast tains ten tracks and as you might have This an interesting offering from a This is nothing more than your average that left-field rock’n’roll band genre rapping, like on ‘Best Foot Forward’ a guessed , it’s influenced by the group which has a lot of different styles dull, repetitive club mixes. This stuff except that there are hints of genius great ball- American dance scene. Apart from to offer. ‘One Sweet Moment’, is a always gives me the impression that the roomesque ‘Scorpion’s Lament’ it’s a bit slow for beautiful and haunting song. ‘Stick tracks could have been produced by a Girl’, tackles the difficult subject of spotty teenager sitting in a dark room, tune with rap- Sven and a touch too housey for some anorexia in young girls very perceptive- with the most daunting task being which ping over the of his old skool fans but still worth lis- ly. The other two songs are faintly remi- sampler button to press every minute or top. ‘A Cellar tening to. Fusion it is: trip hop, house, niscent of the Beck and Ash contribu- so. Don’t even give this crap house Full Of Noise’ bigbeat, liquid spheric sounds all take tions to the soundtrack of ‘A Life Less room. 1/10 E.C. somehow part in this, perhaps slightly tame effort by Sven. 6/10 C.H. SINGLE OF THE WEEK manages to such an appro- priate title THE DELGADOS - Everything with odd nois- Goes Around The Water (Chemikal es and a Underground) slightly I can’t decide whether this is a great spooky feel. tune with a great wall of sound and Whilst ‘Zip male and female vocalists coming Gun Rumble’ together in sheer brilliance or whether sounds like it is dull boring indie pop. I think I’ll they’ve lis- opt for the latter. 4/10 I.P. tened to the Pulp Fiction V/A - Happy Hardcore (Massive) soundtrack to Haply Hardcore. A major theme in this much. 7/10 is homogeneity. Each song sounds like I.P. the last, until it gives you a headache. I’m unimpressed with the originality KEROSENE and creativity by the DJ’s. If your into 454 - At Zero beer, beaches and nightclubs, this may (Slowdime) be your thing. 1/10 I.U. Ever heard a EMMA TOWNSHEND - Winterland (East West) bunch of This weeks music bought to you by Having a famous surname in the world of rock & roll is always a punks when Daniel Jones, Christian Hunter, sure way to draw attention to your debut album (Jakob Dylan they’re given Ikaraam Ullah, Ian Purvey, BERNARD BUTLER - Not Alone (Creation) and Ziggy Marley to name but a few), and in this case Emma’s musical instru- Gabriel-Oliver Chamero, Second single, from guitar genius turned solo artist, whereas ‘Stay’ the previ- album lives up to its expectations. ‘Winterland’ is a work of frac- ments? Emma Clarke,Kevin Marston, ous single was symphonic, ‘Not Alone’ is more upbeat, a classic Phil Spector tured idiosyncrasy, the sort of record one would find in an attic. Kerosene 454 Nick Walsh, Georgina Tarrant, inspired pop song. Extremely catchy, top ten easily, miles better than any- Something you can play and not know when it is from, that has a keeps the Andrew Thomas, Gemma Decent, thing else released this week, a snapshot of greatness from his forthcoming timely ethereal aura to it... quite brilliant. 8/10 G.C. word up for Rob Winder album, plus the B-sides are amazing too. 9/10 N.W. ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 7 (1,1)

n Thursday 12th Marh 1998 Entertainments Guide 7 GIG GUIDE It is always advisable to confirm with the venue before travelling. Cineline - (01483) 578017 20:30 Only Fools & Horses PICK Levellers, The Crocketts - Fri/Sat (13th/14th) 22:20 Parkinson OF THE Guildford Civic Hall (01483 WEEK 444555) As Good as it Gets 21:30 Never Mind the 12:00, 15:10, 18:30, 21:40 Buzzcocks Ether, Transister - London Good Will Hunting Borderline (0171 734 2095) 20:00 Frasier 12:20, 15:30, 18:30, 21:30

13th Trailer, 101, Pinnacle - Reading Titanic Friday 23:35 TFI Firday Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 12:15, 12:55, 16:15, 17:00, 20:30, 21:10 23:25 The Mrs Merton The Butcher Boy Show 13:30, 16:30, 19:10, 21:50 Groop Dogdrill, Foil - Reading The Ice Storm 19:25 Correspondent Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 12:15, 14:40, 17:00 “Jackpot” - London Subterania Fallen (0181 960 4590) 13:40, 16:35, 19:30, 22:20

14th 21:00 Touch of Frost Kiss the Girls 22:15 Frantic 13:00, 16:15, 19:20, 22:10 Saturday Amistad 13:45, 17:55, 21:20 12:00 On the Record IN Coade - In & Out 21:55 Full Metal Jacket YOUR Guildford, Surrey University UNION 19:50 The Edge “Feast” - Reading Alleycat (0118 22:00 956 1116) 21:00 Father Ted FairyTale 15th 22:00 Film: Full Metal 12:45, 15:00, 17:20 (sat only) Sunday Jacket Flubber 12:30, 14:45, 17:00 (sat only) 21:30 They think it’s all over Paws again Bluetones - London Astoria (0171 13:30, 15:50 (sat only) 22:00 Panorama 434 9592) 20:30 Ainsley’s meals in Strange Time, The Convertables, minutes Rising Star - Reading Alleycat (0118 Sun 15th - Thurs 19th

16th 956 1116) 22:55 Whose line is it

Monday anyway As Good as it Gets 13:15, 17:10, 20:20 Bernard Butler - London Upstairs At Good Will Hunting 22:40 Budget 1998 The Garage (0171 607 1818) 12:10, 14:55, 17:40, 20:30 The Hybirds - London Borderline Titanic 11:15, 14:00, 15:20, 19:00, 19:25 21:00 Cutting Edge (0171 734 2095) The Jesus And Mary Chain - The Butcher Boy 12:45, 15:30, 18:10, 20:50

17th Reading Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 22:50 Jack Docherty Show Redwood - London Camden Palace The Ice Storm Tuesday 11:40, 14:00, 16:15 (nb not Wednesday) Bluetones, Regular Fries - London Fallen 21:30 Budget Response by Astoria (0171 434 9592) the Shadow Chancellor 14:15, 17:15, 20:10 Clawfinger, Cold, Bullyrag - Portsmouth Kiss the Girls Wedgewood Rooms (01705 863911) 12:30, 15:20, 18:10, 20:40 Lower, Threat Blanket, Shovel Tongue Amistad - Reading Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 13:00, 16:30, 20:00 18th Moke - London Camden Monarch (0171 22:30 Friends 916 1049) In & Out 18:30 NB not Wednesday Wednesday The Edge Burt, Blink - Reading Alleycat (0118 956 20:40 NB not Wednesday 22:55 Question Time 1116) Clawfinger, Cold, Bullyrag - London FairyTale 13:00 (sun only) 20:30 Top Gear Garage (0171 607 1818) 22:35 Newsnight The Delgados - London Dingwalls Flubber No Santa, Stash - London Camden 12:00, 14:05, 16:10 (sun only) Barfly (0171 482 4808) Paws 19th 20:30 Neighbours from Hell 22:40 Budget ‘98 Spiritualized, Acetone - Guildford Civic 12:30, 14:30 (sun only) Hall (01483 444555) Thursday

21:30 The Client Athletico - London Camden Underworld (0171 482 1932) 21:00 Blackadder II Ferry ‘Cross The Mersey - Guildford Civic Hall (01483 444555) The Hybirds, The Smiles, Sol -

20th Reading Alleycat (0118 956 1116)

Friday 21:30 Father Ted

Union Club opening hours Athletico - London Blue Note Every weekday: Beekeepers - London Camden Barfly 7pm-midnight Pizza + (0171 482 4808) Helyn Rose Bar Breakfast 8:30-11am Finley Quaye - London Shepherds Bush Face/Off Helyn Rose Bar Lunch 12-2pm Empire (0171 287 1331) Hari’s Bar (drink & snacks) 11am-7pm Snug, Carrie, Headcopter - Reading Sunday 15th at 5pm and Alleycat (0118 956 1116) 21th Chancellor’s lunch 12-2pm 8pm, Monday 16th at 8pm “Jackpot” - London Subterania (0181 Chancellor’s afternoon tea 2:30-5pm 960 4590) Saturday ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 8 (1,1)

8 Arts Thursday 12th March 1998 n BACKYARD BABIES Cinema review: Good With The Unrehearsed, Kings Cross Water Rats 2 March 1998. Words and Picture.Rob Winder he rumours about just who would be supporting the Will Hunting (15) TBackyard Babies had been rife for a couple of weeks before this show, so it was a surprise to some to see former Wildhearts Bruce Chapman mainman, Ginger lead some friends onto the compact Water Rats stage and declare “We are the The best things often come Unrehearsed, for reasons that will out of the blue. In the case be very soon apparent”. They blast of this film, the subject through a six-song set of covers ‘Will Hunting’ (Damon), a delivered with passion and power, despite their lack of musical lowly Harvard janitor accomplishment. Bowie’s ‘Queen proves himself to be vastly Bitch’ is dedicated to “the late superior in Mathematics great Mick Ronson and the late than even the most talented great Father Ted”. The band are professor. And in this film. joined for a couple of songs by Kerrang! cartoonist Ray Zell and which has come out of nowhere, there is perhaps then by ex-RealTV singer Jay as offers him bail on the con- par with his Dead Poets they slam through Hanoi Rocks’ something to take the steam dition that he can nurture Society best and on the ‘Malibu Beach Nightmare’ and out of all the hype sur- Hunting’s passion for strength of this film, should The Wildhearts ‘Anthem’, which rounding Titanic. is revealed as an even greater song Maths and that he sees a perhaps consider knocking Hunting is a wise cracking, when stripped of the production therapist. After destroying comedy roles on the head./ street talking Boston lad, that detracted from that last album. many of the America’s Feeling longer than it actu- It seems like Ginger’s record col- who survives from day to finest shrinks, Hinting ally is, Good Will Hunting lection is somewhat like mine, The Wildhearts. When the band hit going on”. The audience response day on his wits and his meets his match in Sean actually is superior to the Unrehearsed - certainly, but defi- the stage the room is full, with is rabid particularly during ‘Look capacity for hard manual nitely fun and the perfect warm up (Williams) who manages to people’s current favourite, nearly as many people stood in the At You’, the forthcoming single, labour. Cleaning at for the Backyard Babies. back room who just can’t fit in, and ‘Bombed (Out Of My Mind)’. take the boy on a voyage of ‘Titanic’. Sharp dialogue Harvard, he is surrounded It seems that in music what goes and the first thing you notice is the The set ends with their best song a self discovery, introducing goes hand in hand with around, eventually comes round by the cream of academia, bands undeniable energy. They are totally awesome run through him to who he is and what touching story telling to again, and that is the case with the a blur of action on the tiny stage, ‘Rocker’, the title saying it all, yet manages to outshine all he desires. Whether this create a film that must be Backyard Babies. You can certain- guitarist Dregen totally manic as then they return for a frenetic those about him due to his ly pick out some of the Swedish happens to be love interest seen. An unexpected the throws himself backwards and cover of Hanoi Rocks’ ‘Taxi mathematical genius. His rockers’ influences in their sound; forwards between the amps and Driver’. Quite simply, this was Skylar, Hunting only finds delight that should sink problem, however , is hid- they draw on the punk edged rock- the monitors. Nicke’s voice is fan- fun, the best night out in years. out at the end of the film. Titanic come Oscar night. ’n’roll rooted in the early seventies ing from his street wise tastic, between songs talking in The performances are first 9/10 with the Stooges and the New near-perfect English, introducing Backyard Babies release ‘Look At past and avoiding the trou- class. New kid on the block York Dolls, and the mid-eighties ‘Subculture Hero’ by railing You’ on March 23, their album ble that leads to him being sound of Hanoi Rocks delivered and co-writer of the film Good Will Hunting (15) against “bands who keep changing and a UK tour follow in April. imprisoned. with the arrogant aggression of their names, keep changing their Don’t miss out. Damon portrays all of Robin Williams, Matt Recognising his natural The Ramones, Guns’N’ Roses and music to whatever fucking trend is Hunting’s emotions perfect- Damon, Minnie Driver ability, a Harvard professor ly. And Williams is on a DEFTONES Portsmouth Pyramids 5 March 1998. Review and Photo Kevin Marston. fter the long and disquieting walk from the station to the venue I am greeted with the Asight of hundreds of fans already queuing outside waiting to get in, all hyped up and ready to go. A few minutes later the members of Deftones walk out casually with the shouts of “Chino, Chino” echoing out of the audience. Then the avalanche of noise cascades down upon you, and with the raw energy pulsating throughout your body you feel the need to join the many lemmings hurling them- selves over the barriers, with that desperate reach for their idol Chino. It is a ferocious attack of deaf- ening quick guitars and the mind numbing basslines added to the steel of Chino voice. Crackling energy exploding round the stage contin- uing the never ending acrobatic skills of Chino pushing him into the act of stage diving. With his searing voice cutting through the air on numbers like ‘7 Words’, ‘Root’, ‘Bored’, ‘My Own Summer(Shove It) and many more. Not being Nightclub advert afraid to mix and mingle with the daunting crowd. And still, they have enough energy to come bound- ing back for an encore, but this time instead of hurtling through their own songs. They played a to be supplied on cover of one of their favourite tracks and then just jammed for a little, while covering tracks from they would come back again if they (Deftones) played groups and adverts. Finishing of with one of their own there again. It virtually responded into a riot. Well, but with a guest appearance from one of their friends what more could I of asked for, a thoroughly energetic as a backing vocalist. When the audience was asked if and brilliant performance. disk HEAVY DUTY DRILL Groop Dogdrill at your Union, 8 March 1998. Review - Daniel Jones entleman’s Excuse Me’ opens and pre- sharp, unforgiving guitars. The bassist could be the pares you with the line “whatever it JFK assailant. The singer/guitarist could be anyone ‘Gtakes”. Tonight Groop Dogdrill give but JFK. But despite this, ‘Jackie O’ pulsates. It pul- everything in a frenzy of inspired noise, whilst sates from a clean arpeggiated intro into a broadscape remaining detached from the reluctant crowd. Rightly chorus and beyond. so - they are too cool, too adamantine to be associated ‘Texaco’ sees the singer go bare chested with the with such people. Yet from whom they grab an atten- mike sellotaped to his face. He resembles Hannibal tion - an attention borne of respect from people who Lector and the band suddenly sound lo-fi - the song is would like to be what they see. a sweet surprise that blends and moulds to your ears ‘Gracelands’ blends funky hard-core and committed like you can only dream of. A very real rock experi- vocals before developing a bout of crazed mayhem. ence with a big twist of alternative and then, finally, This is inspiring, powerful stuff. ‘Personal’ personi- ‘Oily Rag’ encourages crowd participation - surely fies this, an omnipotent, melancholic beast - desperate not at the Union. but assured; comforting you within a cauldron of ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 9 (1,1)

n Thursday 12th March1998 Notices & Personals 9 Personals

■ It wasn’t me! Not guilty. The ■ Munter Magnet Musky teams my personal bodyguard? Love... fancy u now?????? Saturday 28 March ■ Hey, “big ears” Could you not murderer was the resistance.! up tith Ripper Ravager Rawlings - ■ There’s this bloke and he’s got a ■ Thanks for an excellent night ■ Zaza - held anyones hand late- face the fat on the burgers on ■ What’s the difference between AWESOME! pork pie on his head... out lads, Guernsey. ly?? Saturday ‘cos you ate too much fat ■ Hisham! wilcome back, love ■ Did anyone hear about Chris’s ■ The Gulshan? BETTER THAN ■ 2 hrs, 14mins and 28 secs is the on Friday Night??!!. Joe & Homer? One’s yellow and Bourne 4xx cosy cross-dressing co-habita- THAT THE BOMBEY SPICE!! record for the longest loo stop at ■ Hey Dazza - We think you’re stupid - the other likes saying ■ Beware Mr Ellis you are being tion?? (no lard though) ■ Kareem! Vice President of the St Lukes, this prestigious honour great. You the man D’oh! watched!!! ■ Dexter looks desperately for a Russian society is waiting for you is held by Carla, lucky girl ■ Paddington, the best shag in ■ Congratulations to the rugby ■ One WEYSIDE BIRD looking safe corner (or should!!) in WC. Bring the contract. ■ Oi, Jarvis, Get yer Cock-up- months not years, I haven’t got to lads for winning the leagueand for a funky bloke....Anyone up for ■ Jim why haven’t you written to ■ Sandra, Angela & Sara at Her” next time but hey, remember that stage, unlike you. love making fools of themselves on it...? spam yet? Ministry of Sound?? Warning, the talcum powder!” Krustie. ■ ■ ■ ■ Saturday evening. HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my best One day Adam will do some wild girls loose. Weyside birds at Bo’s - shock- The Ginger Fox is thinking of friend NAV....Have a ball on your work on a Tuesday night ■ Hello house of 95 Addison ing behaviour having vegetarian for supper ■ Will ant’s bed ever be the same B’day!! From ur “true” friend!!! ■ Roo, thanks for visiting....at Road, SS. ■ So Julie hot date with that guy tonight. again? ■ Andy don’t be a custard, be a last! ■ Lesson One for making a race you pulled on Thursday? Don’t ■ HUGE Thanks to all the silly ■ Ross Nichol tart! ■ Nicole, now that Ian is here of it. Go through the pits every worry love he wasn’t that crew for an excellent Wednesday - Rugby, beer, women!!!! ■ Whatever did happen to the don’t make too much noise bang- 10th lap. DODGY...... much, love Krustie. the fees anarchists ■ MIKE - I mean’t Im not into chicken in Cathedral court ing in the shower! ■ Bruce - you old flasher, stop ■ Javier has lovely hands Helen ■ Run out of loo roll? Just look balls of the charter type! ■ Has Kostis’ friend found who ■ WEYSIDE BIRDS...look out showing your calvin’s to allthe ■ Thanks...i would be greatful if for a hampster! ■ ■ Emma W, how could you? And was watching him that night? ‘cos london!!!!! girls and boys these personals were published in 2000 pounds Dunc Tut Tut Tut I know who it is!! ■ Looks like Liz and Chris had a ■ Lou - blone hair and blue eyes the next edition of barefacts!!!! ■ Wanted for DJ Donuts: New with TOM too!!! Wednesday will ■ To the new sabbaticals:well really good Friday night out! are the future ■ S: Thanks for a “wicked” week- Coat, present coat need not apply never be the same again!!! done!!! ■ Liz. I lurve those ■ J - so you do know how to end! ■ Alright D.C. got any bat gas!! ■ Put the lotion in the basket. ■ Go Mad for £2.25 at the Rat’s stockings.from Jokerface cook!!?? love S xxx ■ Three people still waiting for an ■ Chinese for all courtesy of ■ Happy Birthday Victor my son, Castle - Bargain! ■ Harri stop lying about how ■ Do you want to come, for a bit apology!!! Andrew Wood !!! best wishes, Harold xxx ■ Avez-avez-un-vesh-vesh, I’d many people u have had sex of tart, in 1A? ■ DF - “Always ready for a large ■ Alex and the eskimo!!!! ■ James (I love Eddie) - Tell me rather have a Kim - Matt Cook ‘98 with!!!!! ■ Roses are red, Violets are blue, one”. ■ Don’t break the law, change the ■ ■ ■ your email address sexy and I’ll If you are at someone else’s Helen, I told you, I haven’t got Sara likes rugby players, and Get some morals Essex-boy! law. Saturday 28 March house, wet,and wearing only a anything to say to you!! Becca Does too!! SCORE SCORE SCORE SCORE ■ Abbi, Hangover and buffalo = send towel, make sure you go in the ■ Dave and Giles playing table ■ Liz and Chris - you were made SURE SURE SURE!!! four stitches ■ CHET, WHERE ARE YOU?!! right room tennis, at four in the morning? It’s for each other xxx ■ Dave.C.M, I love you; your ■ Hey gorgeous Nav...... HAPPY ■ Two little froggies shagging on ■ Cath Court metal man and Dex enough to make anyone flip. ■ Andy-JD wants his Y-fronts lover H. BIRTHDAY!! the bog... limber up for the battle of the ■ Karina! Davai vypiem za nashe back ASAP. ■ Want to know more about ■ Jo - when’s the offy open?? ■ So you think you are going to Goths! zdorovie!!! You know who I am, ■ Tina....we know u fancy Paul in Honey, then goto ■ Krust 2. Helen 13. The gap is have a great Birthday party Nav? ■ Hi from all the L.I.S people to don’t you? the final year!!!! www.honey.com! getting longer. ■ PEMBLE- look out M&S (or is those back in Guildford. ■ Happy Birthday Little JO!!!!!! ■ Alix - Make Helen confess ■ Heed our rallying cry. Saturday ■ The more I think, the more wor- that S&M ??) ■ Bows knees have nipples - love ■ The Cub loves the Bug! about the chicken remarque! 28 March rying I get ■ Krustie. Why is it that you have from Adam ■ Ooo aarr Davey Coulthard, I ■ LOST - MEMORY FROM ■ Uni Court House 51 top floor ■ Swpitwist that name? should I mention ■ Happy Birthday Ruth! Enjoy said ooo arr Davey Coulthard. LAST FEW FRIDAY NIGHTS, IF for top people! ■ To be, or not to be. That is the Madam.Paddington the Ram! ■ MATTHEW BARRETT , whats FOUND PLEASE CONTACT ■ The secret of Carla’s success is question. Whether ‘tis nobler in ■ Raf ( not to mention other ■ Newcastle will win the that in your pants ...... Talking BRAVEHEART!! fibre! love from Kam and the girls the mind to suffer the slings... Tonmeisters) have finally got it in Premiumship so watch out you Bollocks ■ Kat’s finally a fully fledged stu- - that’ll be a relief for the rest of Lot!!! ■ One day Adam will shag his dent. She’s off her trolly!!! us. ■ 2nd year Psychologists - united bird NURSE STEPH, HAPPY ‘HALF ■ Rolf’s cartoon club invites Biffy in stress...... !!!! ■ Jen - Hope everthing works WAY TO Alan & Duncan - the vampire slayer to murder his ■ To the G4 of Worplesdon out!! Locksmiths and handymen for all conscience Rd.....Kick some S.C Ass!!!!! ■ H “I’ve had enough sexual occasions. ■ Mad March Measures - Are you ■ Can you stick these in please? encounters for one day... and now ■ Hello? Is that the AA? The seeing double? ■ Nav aka Lumbhoo...Janamdin I’m dripping!” M25’s moved to Guildford railway ■ Dirty, Sweaty B*ll*cks, but Mubarak!! From a friend!!! ■ Ginger pete - I LOVE YOU!!! station! then I am Irish - Emmet Browne ■ Mark would never even consid- ■ Looks like Chris has worked his ■ FMF, Where are you? Where ■ Green Shirt for Prime Minister! er being unfaithful!! ‘Ice man’ into the Grange! did you go this weekend?SS ■ Cath Court Metal man prepares ■ My foots better but I haven’t ■ Robocop. Doesn’t ALL that gel ■ I wonder how many times will weaponry to subdue rival got any do-nuts now. UM damage your circuits? this personal get printed ? ■ ALL GOT BERNIE ON FRI- ■ pushtara ! Do you want to be ■ Tina A....How many blokes ■ Stand upand be counted! DAY!!! Notices

Rifle Club AGM, Today, Thursday 12th To all University Swimmers. There will be For Sale BC-06 Photo Cartridge for This is your last chance to reclaim your March, 6pm Grant Mitchell Room no swimming 9-10pm at the Spectrum on BCC240 Canon colour printer. James B, prizes from the SURVEY ON SALT (Students’ Union). For further info, contact the following Monday nights: March 23rd, 4216 INTAKE!!!! Number 29 (prize no.1), mt41hb May 11th. Number 65 (prize no.2) and Number 38 Parachute Club AGM Weds 18th Mar 6- (prize no.3). Women’s Football AGM, Today, March The Jewish Society is now functioning! We 7pm Grant Mitchell Room ext 2735 Congratulations! Please contact Sandrine on 12th 1998, 6pm in Hari’s Bar. All members are organising many social and cultural extension 4789. Fencing Club AGM Tuesday 17th March, must attend. Any queries phone Lou events. We really hope to attract more and TB21 20:30 ext 4356 Decriminalise Cannabis March. Sat 28th 579993. more people. So please, if you are interested March, assemble Midday at the reformer’s contact Spam (Student Affairs Officer) on Gamesoc AGM 15th March, 2pm LTA tree in Hyde Park, for march to Trafalgar Rugby Club AGM Tuesday week 9, 6pm ext 9228. tel: 566272. Square. Keep ‘em peeled for more details. Grant Mitchell Room. Contact Ross Nichol for details - 01483 565242 2 rooms to Let in Guildford Park Avenue for Oscar Film Unit E.G.M.: Election of new Postgrad Association barndance, Fri 20th summer period (June -Sept) for further info Treasurer, Tuesday 24th March 1998, LT H March, tickets £3. Contact PGA via pigeon University of Surrey Football Club AGM, ring 01483 833276 at 6p.m. Anyone wishing to stand for the hole for details. Saturday 14th March. Varsity Centre, 6pm. position of Treasurer please leave a note in Contact Dan Babbs (ext 4933) or Paul Cliff WINDSURFING CLUB. Windsurfing tops the OFU pigeonhole ASAP. EGM - Postgrad Association. To elect a (ext 9711) for sale £32.50, mostly navy blue, some new President and Vice-President, 6pm SBS Bio Soc. AGM on March 16th at 1pm other coulour available. Contact Adam, ext. The G&S Society are having their AGM on Wates House, Tuesday 24th March in the Wolfson building. Want an SBS ball? 4241, cv4ab or via the windsurfing pigeon Monday 23rd March at 7.30pm in Beerfest? Cocktails? Academic help? thole. We still meet every Friday at 1pm TB18. Fancy a bit of International Rugby after Outside speakers? Good, so do we. So the exams? The Sanyo Cup at Twickenham upstairs in the Union. All abilities welcome, come to our AGM. Applying Skills After University work- will feature the star-studded World XV ver- we will be running a beginners course later shop - For all those students leaving sus 1998 English Club Champions on Sat this semester. Come along and find out what 2 companies will be conducting surveys the University this year for a placement or 23rd May (end wk 14) Tickets £20 or £26 we’re up to!! around campus in the coming week: NOP career. It will focus on the skills that you including transport. Contact Alex Langley, (on Telecoms), and WSP (on Student have picked up here and ways that you can ext 4739, Email cv31al English tuition required! Travel). All survey personnel will carry use those skills in later life. This workshop Overseas student is looking for help with is free and will be led by "Bob" Moledina Technology and Education Essay compe- identification, and would appreciate your writing English. 2-3 sessions a week if pos- and Rodney Bates. TUESDAY 17th tition. Students are invited to submit essays co-operation, though you’re not obliged to sible (paid). Contact ext.4183 room No. 2 MARCH in Committee Room Z, Senate (1000-3000 words) on the theme of answer any questions. (after 7 pm) House. Technology and Education. Prizes for best four entries (Blackwell’s bookshop vouch- Student needed to cook meals for another Room available in student house off Volunteers needed to help blind student ers worth up to £40). Entries to Mr Z. student! If you make enough for two, I will Northway about 15 mins from campus. Rent type up coursework, fill in application forms Gilpin, PO box 2369, Reading, Berks, RG6 pay the food costs plus £2 per meal. Please £195 pcm until July All mod cons, newly and other general administration. Any help 1YP by April 30th. contact Ghazi Ramadan, ext 4973 welcome. Please call Supriya, Ext 4240. refurbished etc. Phone (01483) 504629 ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 10 (1,1)

10 Features Thursday 12th March 1998 n Postgrad Dr. Russ replies... conference Dear Russ doesn’t seem like a good idea. So you have to I’m thinking of putting a emphasise only those things curriculum vitae together. which are relevant to your Jane Malcolm-Davies reports Surrey in the future. The most recent teachers” (1994),”Guidelines for the Is there a recommended application. If you’ve done meeting was on Saturday 28 February conduct of research degree appeals” on the work of the National way for doing it? a Professional Year, for at the University of Birmingham, (1995), and “Guidelines on accommo- Postgraduate Committee and example, you should give where the PGA was represented by dation and facilities for postgraduate its recent visit to our own Dear Louise this greater prominence on Tony Ede, Andy Gale and Richard research” (1995). The Students Union Postgraduate Association. your CV than other more Smith. The agenda included elections itself is offered advice on providing a Let me say, first of all, that casual jobs. If you are for vacant posts (see above), nomina- service for postgraduate students in he university’s Postgraduate there are no rules about going for degree -related tions for an honorary president and The Postgraduate Book - the NPC’s Association (PGA) recently what you can or can’t put in employment you should discussions on the writing-up period of welfare handbook. hosted a visit by Martin Gough a CV. I’ve been collecting provide a breakdown of T research study, strict submission dead- of the National Postgraduate CV’s for years and they are your course which empha- lines, full-time versus part-time issues Also on offer from the NPC is the Committee (NPC). Martin is the gen- all different. One of them is sises the relevant subjects and a number of official reports and Journal of Graduate Education, which eral secretary of the organisation presented in the form of a you have covered. reviews of postgraduate education. “If provides a forum for the discussion of which represents the interests of more cartoon strip, another one Basically you’ve got to any postgraduate students want to relevant issues each quarter, particu- than 200,000 post-graduate students in has a picture of someone anticipate what the employ- raise issues of importance in a future larly postgraduate administration sys- the UK. He is the only full-time trapped inside a bubble with er wants to read and leave meeting, please let us know” says tems, quality assurance and the need employee, which makes him a very the caption underneath out the irrelevant. This Andy, who can be contacted at the for formal training programmes. Other busy man. His visit to the Surrey cam- “untapped potential”. could mean it ends up on Students Union or on [email protected] matters include a re-examination of pus in January was part of a gruelling one page. A two page CV is rey.ac.uk. the PhD and the likely effects of form- tour around many colleges and univer- Mind you, for most jobs it OK as well. Three pages is ing Graduate Schools at educational sities. “The sole general secretary of will not be in your interests probably too long. The NPC’s constitution sets out its institutions. There is a more regular the organisation cannot do all of this to produce an unusual CV. aims and objectives, which include newsletter (on line and in print) offer- on their own without omitting tasks of It should look attractive, but By the way, if you’d like to promoting the welfare of postgraduate ing news and reports, with refereed running the NPC effectively,” says not bizarre. You’d do well see a model CV, why not students, communication and co-oper- contributions from postgraduate stu- Martin. He is supported by a team of to get it laser printed on a pick up the yellow leaflet ation between postgraduate student dents. Features in the current issue volunteers, most of whom are on full- decent quality paper. It is called “Curriculum Vitae” associations and societies and repre- cover funding in the light of the time courses. However, in his short also a good idea to embold- on the display rack in the senting and advancing the interests of Dearing Committee and the creation of term of office since October, Martin en a few key words such as Careers Service. In the postgraduates in the UK while remain- a national directory of programmes has managed to shift the national your degree subject or job meantime, if you want ing politically unaligned. Work which will draw together information debate on funding of studies to include titles, especially where they someone in the Careers towards these aims is carried out by a on the 9,000 taught courses and 4,500 the postgraduate perspective, with sig- are relevant to the job Service to check over your committee, elected at the summer con- research opportunities available in the nificant coverage in the press. you’re applying for. CV we’d be glad to. ference each year. These positions UK. All NPC conference proceedings include: general secretary, treasurer, are also published. Two discussion He is based at the University of Leeds. What you choose to put in minutes secretary and chairperson plus groups exist on line, too: one for post- His post and the NPC itself is funded the CV is crucial. I’ve seen two ordinary executive officers. The graduates to share ideas, opinions and by subscriptions from affiliated insti- 5-page CV’s with the per- Russ Clark organisation is concerned to highlight problems and another specifically tutions. The NPC aims to influence son’s life history on it. Careers Service the problems specific to postgraduates, devoted to NPC business. Individuals education policy nationally, acting as a Bearing in mind the average which are often overlooked in national can join these groups at the NPC’s campaigning voice and resource base CV gets about two minutes student politics (eg the year-round worldwide web site address: of information for postgraduates. It of an employer’s time, this nature of many research degrees and http://www.npc.org.uk. has links with the National Union of the higher proportion of overseas stu- Students, the Council for Graduate dents). The NPC is concerned that Education, research councils, govern- Careers service recent changes in higher education in Individuals may also subscribe to the ment departments and the media. The the UK have led to a dramatic expan- NPC - membership offers a copy of the organisation also has a representative sion in the numbers of postgraduates bi-monthly newsletter, free copies of on the Review of Postgraduate without additional funds for staff and the “guidelines” (usually £2 each), and Education set up by Higher Education facilities, leading to an unsatisfactory copies of the Quarterly Journal of Funding Council for England, which is mismatch between student numbers Graduate Education at a reduced rate. researching recommendations for the and resources. The annual fee is £12 (without the improvement of postgraduate educa- journal) and £20 with it. tion. The NPC also offers a number of use- ful publications, known as the “guide- Although the positions of honorary lines”. Each booklet provides a set of If any postgraduate students wish to president and minutes secretary are draft guidelines on which institutions know more about the NPC, please con- currently vacant, Martin, the chairper- can base their own. They provide a tact our own PGA via Mark Pullinger son and treasurer are supported by two standard against which good practice (Secretary), at lab 22AZ20 (tel exten- part-time members of staff - a publica- at institutions may be measured, and sion 2617), at home on tel (01483) tions assistant and an information support for individual postgraduates or 577919 or [email protected] or assistant. There is a substantial com- their representatives as they argue for Martin Gough himself c/o Leeds mittee of 12 elected officers, 12 improved provision. The Students University Union, PO Box 157, Leeds regional representatives and a host of Union has a complete set of these LS1 1UH, tel/fax 01924 370504 or posts on sub-committees too. guidelines, which are available for [email protected]. consultation if any student wishes to The committee of Surrey’s own PGA find evidence to suggest or support a is looking at ways of improving com- change in the university’s provision A full Birmingham conference report munication between the national for postgraduates. Titles include will follow soon... forum and other postgraduate organi- “Codes of practice for postgraduate sations throughout the country. The research” (1992), “Guidelines for (So that was just the brief version, then? -ed) NPC holds quarterly meetings - these instructional postgraduate courses” offer an opportunity for post-graduates (1993) - this covers taught to discuss issues which affect them. courses,”Guidelines for the employ- The PGA committee is considering ment of postgraduate students as hosting one of these conferences at ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 11 (1,1)

n Thursday 12th March 1998 Features 11 Burway Head of the OFU River Race Face/Off believed to be dead, wakes up from his coma and does the same. Our next race is Kingston Head on Saturday 14th Jilla Ferguson and Annie Preston March where the same crews are competing. Any This weeks OFU film is Face/Off Showing on Sunday 15th at 5pm & support would be greatly appreciated. with John Travolta and Nicolas 8pm and Monday 16th at 8pm Cage Only the tough-skinned braved the cold, drizzle and playing each other and they do so Reserve your tickets now via the general dampness of this Saturday afternoon at brilliantly. Travolta plays Sean post box in the union post room Burway. We had two crews representing the Archer, an FBI Agent who has to try and watch out for the Easter University of Surrey, a men’s novice quad and a and find a biological weapon that Bonanza, 4 Films on 2 Days at a women’s (very novice) four - the first women’s race has been placed in L.A. by a sadis- bargainousprice, featuring- Event of the season. The day started with bright-eyed tic terrorist-for-hire and criminal Horizon + Bullitt + Chasing Amy + crew members, prepared after a good feed the night mastermind Castor Troy (Cage). The Devils advocate. before and lots of sleep ready for the day. Cox was Archer has hunted Troy for the last not quite as prepared, ball dress in one hand, bottle 8 years and is consumed by revenge of Bud. in kit-bag and ready for....hic...action. because Troy is responsible for the Your’re a star Carla! death of his son. To find the weapon, Archer ‘borrows’ the face The women’s crew struck a few difficulties with of Troy however, Castor who was grounding whilst waiting for the start, but trusty cox, with joggers rolled to the knee, hangover set- Crossword No. 68 ting in nicely, got out and pushed! (Girls, what did I say about that very large piece of chocolate fudge cake?).

Both crews rowed the 3000 metres superbly and it was a great experience for us all. The men’s quad finished with a time of 10.00 minutes and the women’s four a time of 13.50 minutes. Congratulations to all that took part and many thanks to all those that supported and encouraged us along the way and kept us well watered, armed with water-bottles and jumpers for the finish.

Across: 7. Extinguish (6) 8. A rectangular figure (6) 9. To gambol (4) 10. Spectres (8) 11. Loud and grating (8) 13. Poet (4) 14. An electrical unit (4) 16. Bitter quality (8) 18. Lethargic (8) 21. Haystack (4) 22. Musical studies (6) 23. Pruned (6)

Down: 1. Dish of sweetened curds (6) 2. Unimpaired (8) 3. Consignment of goods for overseas (8) 4. A continent (4) 5. Injured (4) 6. A slight quiver (6) 12. Song-thrush (8) 13. Insolvent (8) 15. A drug (6) 17. A hollow receptacle (6) 19. Orderly (4) 20. The Orient (4)

Last weeks solution: Across: 1.livid 4.polygon 8.gravels 9.fined 10.cue 11.multitude 13.litany 15.studio 18.wayfarers 20.rut 21.fudge 23.lumbago 24.righted 25.adder Down: 1.logical 2.violently 3.dream 4.pestle 5.leftist 6.gin 7.nudge 12.underhand 14.nearest 16.outdoor 17.yelled 18.wafer 19.samba 22.dog ed980312.qxd 21/04/98 15:56 Page 12 (1,1)

12 Sport Thursday 26th February 1998 n Wales fans sing Campusport

however, did not take up their invitation ... I wonder why?!!! The Latin American Regular instructors, Kate, Clive and Yvonka taught the class how to boogie on their way to down ‘70s style. With moves like the ‘Funky Chicken’, ‘John Travolta Strut’, ‘Scrub Your Pants’ and ‘Shimmy’, who could have failed to have had a laugh. Night we’ve all been If you didn’t make it to the class, just imagine the combination of the groovy moves with the afro wigs, flares and sequins sported by instructors Kate and victory waiting for Clive and well, I’ll leave the rest to your imagination! It is important to keep in mind that whilst the class was fun it had a serious ele- ment, that of fund raising. On a positive note I cannot think of a better way to raise money for that particular charity than by exercising aerobically and there- already been suspended fore increasing the efficiency of the heart and helping to decrease the risk of Matt Pannell OLE!! THAT’S RIGHT FOLKS - THE POSTPONED LATIN AMERICAN heart disease. becaue of their persistent EVENING IS HERE AT LAST! NEXT FRIDAY 20TH MARCH 7.00 P.M. AT Editor (and very good) singing. THE VARSITY CENTRE. The class was a success and, if you are desperate for more or missed out this Tickets are on sale at the Sports Centre - special student price £4.75 which cov- time, there are plans to repeat the event later in the year. If you have any sug- ers your lesson, a hot chilli (vegetarian available), a free tequila and a disco. A They may always complain gestions on other possible themes for a charity aerobics class, drop them into If your involvement in brilliant evening and excellent value - don’t delay tickets always go fast. No pre- Campusport, or better still join in one of the aerobics or dance classes at about the stereotype they Rugby goes as far as trying vious dance experience necessary - just a sense of fun - you won’t be disap- Campusport and tell your instructor afterwards! pointed. put up with over here, but to hear yourself think over Kate Scanlan you should have seen them the din of their brash and Reluctantly we have had to cancel the Friday I.D. Ballroom Dancing due to lack on Saturday. Thousands boorish singing in the of numbers. Those of you who want to continue can join up with the Ballroom Dance Society, who meet every Wednesday, 7.30 p.m. in the University Hall. upon thousands of Wales Union, then going to see a supporters packed into game like this really is a bit Wembley Stadium to see the of an eye-opener. You can Dance to the heartbeat five nations rugby match watch the game unfold like against Scotland. And what a cricket match, yet it comes do they bring with them? with all the pace and unpre- The Wednesday night aerobics session underwent a dramatic makeover last week when it jumped back two decades to find inspiration from the 19070s. The Daffodils, leeks, flags with dictability of football. The class was a one off event for charity. It is the third year running that Campusport dragons on them and - crowd don’t spit and swear have organised events to coincide with the British Heart Foundation’s “Dance to you’ve guessed it - an at one another as much as the Heartbeat” campaign. The class raised over £60 for the charity - so well done to everyone! inflatable sheep. The plat- football fans, either. It’s a The event was attended by a mix of students and lecturers and not just the die- form announcements at good way to spend your hard aerobics fans - it was great to see so many new faces. The Rugby Club, Marylebone station had Saturday afternoon.

Wales fans at Wembley for the 5 nations rugby match against Scotland on Saturday. Photo: Matt Pannell ....The Results.....The Results....The Results.....Res

Sporty Thang The Enemy Us Them Sporty Thang The Enemy Us Them FOOTBALL M1 HOCKEY W1 FOOTBALL M2 HOCKEY W2 FOOTBALL M3 NETBALL 1 FOOTBALL M4 NETBALL 2 FOOTBALL W1 RUGBY M1 BADMINTON M1 RUGBY M2 BADMINTON M2 RUGBY W1 BADMINTON W1 SQUASH M1 BASKETBALL SQUASH M2 FENCING SQUASH W GOLF VOLLEYBALL M HOCKEY M1 VOLLEYBALL W

Cazza’s daft bit that’s always in capitals, and that only the sports mafia understand, isn’t here. She’s too busy worrying about her minibus road tax forms, and finding someone to drive the women’s waterpolo team up to Leeds. Let ‘em run, I say. She’s also got to find those chairs she nicked from the Bare Facts office last week and still hasn’t brought back. And after all, what has she got to write about with no results in the table? (no matches, apparently). The only action seems to have been off the pitch - as Paul ‘Stiffy Cliffy’ has been in to look at the personals page anxiously, saying ‘there might be some about me from last week, and they might start chiselling me about it.’ ‘Chiselling’? What are they like?