" ..tZI } . -- ~.:~.~ -IIiiIoIP' .v:~~~~ , ~!...Il! . ~~~~,"",,~ :'''' ' '''''''' '''''''''''''':''' ':'''~ "'"':-- -.- , ~""".""""' ~ """~""'- " . - -. ..... _: ..... The Undergraduate Odyssey by John J. Miller of Literature, Science, and the Arts legitimate reservations about what they Westemideas. To determine the extent . Graduation ceremonies tend to (LSA) in early May, many of its mem­ have purchased. to which these criticisms affect LSA, offer little for the intellect. Students bers will know the price of their diplo- Critics have assailed our nation's we can create a case study of a student who actually listen to the commence­ who enrolled at the U-M in the fall ment speakers find themselves hoping semester of 1987 and will graduate on to be entertained, not enlightened. Al­ May 4,1991. Our imaginary friend will thoughitappears that PresidentGeorge have completed the minimum 120 Bush will be delivering an address in credits and fulfilled the other require­ front of this year's graduating class, ments necessary for a Bachelor in Gen­ odds are he will either utter platitudes eral Studies degree - an option uti­ or direct his words toward the televi­ lized by just under eight percent of the sion cameras, and not the students. LSA students who gradtlated in the The graduation ceremony itself, 1989-90 school year, according to the however, provides an excuse to assess Registrar's Office. the state of affairs in liberal arts educa­ mas - approximately $12,500 for in­ universities in recent years for lax re­ What follows is a list of classes tion. When the University of Michigan's state students and $42,000 for out-of­ quirements, politicized course offer­ taken by our fictitious student, ac­ classof1991 graduates from the College state students. They might also harbor ings, and the near-abandonment of companied by the number of credits awarded and oftentimes an excerpt of the class description as presented in the LSA Course Guide. This survey Inn to Become a Private Dorm? intends not to question the merit of any by David J. Powell as a private dormitory for U-M stu­ trolled housing system without being one course in particular, but rather the Neil Gorosh and his Southfield­ dents next fall. According to the Ann forced to adopt a different lifestyle, educational experience as a whole. based loPatin Company recently an­ Arbor News, the rental price would in­ such as apartment living. nounced plans to make the former Ann clude a comprehensive meal plan - in In order to lure students away from Fall 1987 Arbor Inn the first "free market dorm" contrast to the University's limited 13- traditional dorms, Gorosh is depend­ e American Culture 222: Elementary in Ann Arbor. meal-a-week plan - and utilities, ing on more than just the promise of Ojibwa (3). "This course is designed to In light of the University of minus telephone costs. In addition, better food and M1V. He is exploring give the conversational and cultural Michigan's recent increase in housing students would have access to cable • the possibilities of a laundry service, skills necessary to enable students to costs and the lack of faith in television, a luxury item not currently maid service, secretarial service, al1 . use Ojibwa in real life situations." privatization demonstrated by Ann available to all dorm residents. exercise room, and a swimming pool. eEnglish 125 (4). Arbor's newly elected mayor, Liz Particulary striking are the p0s­ Nevertheless, the most lasting ef­ eSociology 102: Contemporary Social Brater, Gorosh's plan to introduce sible ramifications of "free market fect of such a plan would be the intro­ Issues (4). Section 18: An Introduction market principles into University dorms" on the infamous U-M meal ductionof greater flexibility in Univer­ housing could not have come at a bet­ plan. In the past, a sfudent'scomplaints sity living - the first step in providing Please See Page 6 ter moment. For the first time, U-M about the poor quality of dorm food better services for students and elimi­ housing officials must address the fell on deaf ears. The implementation nating the University's long-standing concern that students who prefer the of Gorosh's plans would not only pro­ monopoly on dormitory living. dorm system might take their business vide an incentive for better dorm ser­ INSIDE elsewhere. vices, including better food, but it David J. Powell is a sophomore in If all goes as planned, the former would empower students as well. Next political science and a contributing Ann Arbor Inn, located at the comer of year, a student would have the real editor of the Review. But Wait! Fourth Avenue and Huron, will open option of leaving the University-con- There's Muir... S Eastern Adopts Speech Code Interview: by Stacey Walker speech, behavior, or other forms of ex­ sounds a bit familiar. Prior to the 1989 Phyllis Schlafly 8 Eastern Michigan University pression, and /I extreme or outrageous" federal court ruling that struck down a joined the ranks of the sensitive on acts or communications intended to University of Michigan policy on dis­ March 27. In a unanimous decision, harass, intimidate, or humiliate a per­ criminatory behavior, EMU was pre­ Baseball Picks 10 EMU's board of regents voted to ap­ son on the basis of race, ethnicity, re­ paring to implement a policy closely prove a discrimination and discrimi- ligionorcreed,age, handicap or sexual resembling the U-M version. After natoryhar~ss~entpolicy. , , , . " orientation. D'Souza Review 12 The new policy prohibits offensive Do 'not be surprised if this,' policy . Please See Page 13 . ...,,,_ •••,._ ... w ...· .• ~~,~~ __ _ ~ ,, __~~ _"..-,., . , '··" "" _1"''''''''_V... '.'',.,_'''''''''~· -~-"""",... ",.-.,.. ~ ...... " The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 2 THE Serpent's Tooth MICHIGAN So, what's with all the U-M feminists against sexism. Participants spent Our tentative schedule consists of the REVIEW protesting Playboy's recruiting drive . hours erecting "the wall of sexism," following: forits "Girls of the Big Ten" issue? Are which they covered with advertise­ . Friday: you guys rattled because you can't get ments picturing women. Then, to un­ 5:00 P.M. Cocktails and caviar. in, or because you'd have to shave load their frustrations, they viciously 9:00 P.M. Keynote Speech, John Birch. your legs for once? destroyed the wall. In response, the Saturday: The Campus Affairs Review has decided to construct "the 9:00 A.M. Golf (yes, 18 holes). Journal of the sexy wall." We will be posting adver­ 3:00 P.M. Tennis - Mixed Doubles. University of Michigan In a recent Daily article concerning tisements that display attractive 7:00 P.M. Debutante Ball. Earth Week, MSA environmental women and awarding prizes for the Sunday: Editor-:-in-Odef. .......... BrianJendryka commission chair Aberdeen Marsh sexiest local and national ads. Our an­ 6:00-11:00 A.M. Church (Sermon de­ explained the rationale behind select­ sweringmachine will also be entertain­ livered by Jonathon Edwards). Fol­ Executive Editor ............ Adam DeVore ing Lois Gibbs to speak at the week's ing entries for the best erotic moan. lowed by esoteric social functions. Executive Editor... ...................JeffMuir culminating event: "We really wanted Please wait for the beep. 3:00 P.M. Tea and Charity Ball to help to get a woman speaker because the homosexuals "come over to the other Contributing Editor.... .DavidJ.Powell majority of the legwork (involving in side." Contributing Editor. ......Stacey Walker environmental issues) is done by Aren't the words MENstruation and women." And that's a good thing­ MENopause inherently sexist? The Publisher.......... .............. .Mark O. Stern because women have the best legs. failure of SAPAC, the Wymmin's A recent Daily article explained, how­ Stoodies Departmynt, and U-M femi­ ever, why one really ought to attend Assistant EditorM ...... Peter Daugavietis Assistant Editor.. .................. Corey Hill nists in general to address this critical Women's Weekend. As one of the Assistant Editor. ........... ~ .....Jay McNeill Q: How many PC'ers does it take to issue betrays the fact that even they are event's organizers put it,"People screw in a light bulb? A: That's not comfortable working within our evil should come because events (concern­ Copy Editor ......................... Dala Taylor funny. Q: How many white males partriarchal system. We just don't ing women) are usually so spread out. Music Editor...... .................Chris Peters does it take? A: One. know who to trust anymore. In East Quad, they're condensed into a Literary Editor.... .......... Adam Gargiola weekend." Nice metaphor. MTS Editor...... .................. DougThiese Francophile ................ KarenBrinkman Later this month, the Sexual Assault In the wake of the U-M's decision to Prevention and Awareness Center reduce tuition installments from three According to a recently discovered in­ Staff (SAP AC) will sponsor a ''Take Back te two next school year, we wonder stitute for the Humanities flyer, Teresa Chris Bair, Mike Beidler, David the Night" march. We weren't aware how much more money and .trees de Lauretis, Professor of History of Boettger, Mister Boffo, Spencer the night was missing, but presumably could be saved if the Michigan Vidoo Consciousness (sic) lectured on "Freud, Carney, Joe Coletti, Brian Cook, Sam Copi, Vincent DeSantis, Mary Dzon, they'll take it back from the moon. But Yearbook fliers were eliminated from Sexuali ty, and Perversion" on Apti18 in Athena Foley, John Gnodtke, Reg thenthey'll have to giveitto ... the Sun! the mailings entirely. the Rackham Amphitheater. After the Goeke, Jon Hoekstra, Nicholas Patriarchy! Astrological, cosmic Patri­ presentation, a reception was sched­ Hoffman, Omar Javaid, Kishore archy! uled to be held, though the location was Jayabalan, Heather Johnston, Gary In honor of East Quad's recent left unspecified. Nevertheless, the Mally,Bud Muncher, Crusty Women's Weekend and the preceding whole set-up leads one to wonder who Muncher, Megan Nelles, Greg Roth, And, in case you didn't hear, the saps events of Gay Pride Week, we have • was on the receiving end of what Michael Skinner, Jay Sprout, John at SAP AC recently sponsored a rally decided to organize WASP weekend.