UNIVERSITY COUNCIL SEATS // PAGE 18 YOU CAN’T HYDE | THE FAKE WRISTBANDS // PAGE 20 HUMANS OF HYDE | PULL-OUT POSTER // PAGE 22 ISSUE 06 // 30 MAR 2015 CRITIC.CO.NZ ALLOWANCE UP BY $0.90 // BY-ELECTION RESULTS // EXECRABLE // PROCTOLOGY // SCHOOL OF EDUCATION REFUSE LEAVE FOR SCHOOL CAMP // STOCKS INSTALLED // POLITICS // NICKY HAGER INTERVIEW // NEWS IN BRIEFS // SPORTS // ISSUE 6 : 30 MARCH 2015 FEATURES 20 YOU CAN’T HYDE With a tainted history, but a loved tradiiton, The Hyde Street Party now bans first years and out-of- towners to ensure an awesome time for everyone. 2015 was a success despite official police reports. BY LYDIA ADAMS 20 22 HUMANS OF HYDE Following on from Humans of New York, we followed the quirky bunch at this year’s Hyde Street Party. The intellectual answers of the Scarfies there this year only supported the idea that the best sorts are here in Dunedin. BY OLIVIA COLLIER 22 NEWS & OPINION COLUMNS CULTURE 04 ALLOWANCES VS. RENT 39 LETTERS 30 ART 05 EXECRABLE 42 SCEPTIC SCHISM 31 FOOD 06 BY-ELECTION RESULTS 42 CRUSH ON CAMPUS 32 SCREEN AND STAGE 10 POLITICS 43 DAVID CLARK 34 BOOKS 12 INTERVIEW: NICKY HAGER 43 A BROAD VIEW 35 GAMES 14 NEWS IN BRIEF 44 SCIENCE, BITCHES! 37 MUSIC 16 SPORTS 44 BACK OF THE CLASS 38 HOROSCOPES 18 UNI COUNCIL SEATS 45 ODT WATCH 46 LOVE IS BLIND 24 THE CRITIC TEAM EDITOR JOSIE COCHRANE TECH EDITOR KAT GILBERTSON FEATURES DESIGNER CERI GIDDENS NEWS EDITOR LAURA MUNRO CULTURE EDITOR LOU CALLISTER-BAKER FEATURES EDITOR LAURA STARLING SUB EDITOR MARY MCLAUGHLIN CHIEF REPORTER JOE HIGHAM NEWS TEAM AMBER ALLOTT, BRIDIE BOYD, STEPH TAYLOR, MAGNUS WHYTE, ZAHRA SHAHTAHMASEBI SECTION EDITORS BASTI MENKES, SOPHIE EDMONDS, MANDY TE, BRANDON JOHNSTONE, BRIDGET VOSBURGH, HENRY NAPIER, DANIEL LORMANS CONTRIBUTORS HYDE WAS A HOOT! EMMA LODES, FINBARR NOBLE, » THE HOOT THAT WAS HYDE HARLAN JONES, OLIVIA COLLIER, LYDIA ADAMS, ISABEL LANAUX, SHAUN SWAIN, RACHAEL HODGE, SIMON KINGS- LEY-HOLMES, THOMAS LORD, Last week we held a competition for you to often. Of course the police are never going to KIRSTEN KAMPMEIER choose which Hyde Street photo would make encourage a party where everyone gets pretty DISTRIBUTOR MAX POCOCK the cover of Critic. You went nuts. I tried to rig white girl wastey, but I spoke to a lot of cops ONLINE CONTENT MANAGER it by putting my favourite four photos at the that day and they all seemed happy. At one of AMAN JAMWAL start of the album but, no, you social media last year’s rugby sevens matches, there were ADVERTISING SALES whizzkids could not be fooled. 20 arrests and 270 people removed from the JOSH HANNAGAN, ELAINE OLDHAM, stadium. See? There are morons everywhere RACHEL ENRIGHT It’s time everyone got better taste though. By — no need to paint the whole student popula- a mile, the photo with the guy who wore a bra tion with a tainted image. and had a teddy strapped on facing his man CONNECT parts had the most likes. But there was no way The point of the police giving the party a bad READ ONLINE I was putting that on the cover of this classy rap is to make OUSA, and the others involved CRITIC.CO.NZ ISSUU.COM/CRITIC_TE_AROHI mag. Seriously, people? A lot of students, be- in organising it, rethink how they might make lieve it or not, haven’t seen that classic, 21 & it even better next year. One idea I’ve already GET IN TOUCH [email protected] Over, so a teddy bear stuffed down someone’s heard has been bringing the kegs back to Hyde FACEBOOK.COM/CRITICTEAROHI pants would be rather disturbing to the small and not allowing any other alcohol — that TWEET: @CRITICTEAROHI children in town who occasionally see Critic could actually be an awesome idea (providing (03) 479 5335 lying about. supply met demand, of course!). Another idea P.O. BOX 1436, DUNEDIN is to not let those who are at an incomprehen- And that poor guy is probably wondering, sible level of drunk into the event. That’s the “Why is there a teddy bear glued to my penis?” process for a party anywhere else. But he did look like he was having fun. Almost What’s worse is when you see TV news re- as much fun as the rest of us on Hyde. Aside porters using footage from previous years to Critic is a member of the Aotearoa Student Press Association (ASPA). from the idiots who got themselves arrested, show everyone what a ruckus bunch we ap- Disclaimer: the views presented within this publication do not necessarily represent the views of the Editor, PMDL, it was a bloody great day. Everyone I spoke parently are. That’s not even journalism — it’s or OUSA. to seemed to be having a whale of a time, a historical documentary. Press Council: people with a complaint against a magazine should first complain in writing to the Editor and then, if and every year the event gets safer and more not satisfied with the response, complain to the Press Council. Complaints should be addressed to the Secretary, organised. It’s a shame the media (yes, you JOSIE COCHRANE PO Box 10-879 The Terrace, Wellington. ODT) decide to focus on the shit side of it all too CRITIC EDITOR critic.co.nz ISSUE 6 3 NEWS [email protected] Government Offers 90c to Solve Rent Crisis » THAT’S AN EXTRA BANANA ON THE SHOPPING LIST BY LAURA MUNRO S tudyLink’s Annual General Adjustment is set to come into effect from 1 April 2015, ocial Development Minister Anne meaning that student allowances and student loan living costs will rise just 0.51 per cent. Tolley announced this year’s increase, S stating: “Rates and thresholds for a range of Work and Income and StudyLink as- AGE LIVING PARENTS EARNING ELIGIBLE FOR sistance will rise to keep up with increasing living costs … These increases help make sure $140.08 UNDER 24 AT HOME UNDER $84,163.86 people who rely on state assistance aren’t dis- (ALLOWANCE) advantaged by inflation.” Despite Tolley’s statements, figures show $175.10 UNDER 24 AWAY FROM HOME UNDER $91, 448.30 that rents are rising at a much faster rate than (ALLOWANCE) student living costs and allowances. When the loan scheme was introduced in $176.86 UNDER 24 AT HOME OVER $84,164.86 1993, rent in Dunedin averaged $50.61 per stu- (LOAN) dent. Housing costs only took up one-third of $176.86 a student’s weekly allowance. In 2014, average UNDER 24 AT HOME OVER $91,448.30 (LOAN) weekly rent came to $120.18. Tolley said StudyLink assistance rises $168.09 OVER 24 AWAY FROM HOME IRRELEVANT each year to keep up with inflation, yet last (ALLOWANCE) year students who received living costs spent $210.13 OVER 24 AWAY FROM HOME IRRELEVANT an average of 70 per cent of their weekly pay- (ALLOWANCE) ment on rent. Students receiving an allowance with the added $40 accommodation benefit Students who receive the allowance are also able to apply for a $40 accommodation benefit. were spending 56 per cent of it on rent. Proportion of student income (government support) servicing average University of Otago student housing costs 70% 52.5% LOANS 35% 17.5% 0% ALLOWANCES 1993 2009 2015 S ince 2009, student loan living costs, which In 2011, 66 per cent of full-time students accommodation benefit has been stuck here were $160.70, have risen by only 9.52 per cent at Otago relied on living costs for their in- since Therefore, as rents continue to rise, the to $175.96 in 2014. The increase set to come come. In 2012 this rose to 67 per cent, and amount of allowance students receive each into effect on 1 April will see the maximum in 2013 it jumped to 71 per cent. For these week increases by very little. The proportion living costs raised to $176.86. If rent remains students, housing costs are quickly outpac- of students receiving an allowance was 44 per at an average of $120.18, even though patterns ing the level of payment they are receiving cent in 2011, 42 per cent in 2012 and 34 per cent show an increase each year, students will still weekly. These students are not eligible for the in 2013. be spending 68 per cent of their payment $40 accommodation benefit. The maximum allowance, including max- on rent. In the past, those receiving a student imum accommodation benefit, was $191.70 Student rents in Dunedin have increased allowance were able to keep up with in- in 2009. This has only risen 11.75 per cent to by $23.45, or 19.52 per cent, since 2010. Al- creased housing costs due to the allowed $214.21 in 2014. lowances and loans have increased by a mere accommodation benefit. In 2012, however, $9.52, or 11.75 per cent, in the same period. Dunedin reached their $40 per week, and the Thanks to NZUSA for providing these figures. 4 ISSUE 6 critic.co.nz NEWS E X E C R A B L E OUSA Affiliates Dunedin Pro-Life Group BY LAURA MUNRO his week’s executive meeting was de- said “oh shit” with a mouth full of potatoes. allowed to refer individuals to Student Health. layed for a few days due to “weekend If these rules are broken, the group’s affiliation T activities causing fatigue.” Judging by A decision was made for OUSA to renew its will be reconsidered.