Top 10 Tips for Homeschooling

How I wish I could go back to myself over seventeen years ago when my oldest was still in pre-school and tell me what was important. Over the years I have spent so much energy stressing about things that just did not matter.

I equate it to that new parent feeling. You want to get it right from the start. You buy all the books and talk to other parents. Every gadget and new and improved baby item feel like a must have. You sterilize and sanitize everything, keeping your baby free from germs and potential illness. You stress and analyze every noise, every feeding, and sleeping pattern. Once your child is crawling and walking you baby proof the house. And then, one day, you find them drinking from the dog bowl, eating dirt, or climbing up the outside railing of your steps. I know this because these all happened to me. As your children grow, so do you. You start to realize what truly is important in parenting. You begin to learn that even though they have a rough sleeping patch, they will eventually outgrow it. You see firsthand that you can’t (and probably shouldn’t) protect them from every germ. As your child gets older you are faced with new challenges and helping your middle school child navigate life is a far cry from locking down your cupboard doors to keep them out. And by the time they are driving you wish all you had to worry about was a baby sleeping through the night.

This is how homeschool feels to me. In the beginning I spent a lot of stressful hours making sure I got it right the first time. I desperately didn’t want to mess anything up. My children’s education was on the line. I also felt like I had something to prove to the world that my children could succeed and be just as smart as any public school educated child. Now that I have one graduated from college, one in college and only one more child at home who is in high school, I feel like I have a grasp on what is important.

I want to share with you my top tips for homeschooling, and where you can spend your energy. I believe that these items are some of the most important and focusing on them will help you achieve your goals without unnecessary stress.

Here are my top ten things to focus on when you homeschool.

1) School needs to be a priority and should not be “when we get around to it.” Let’s face it folks, if it only happened when you felt like, it never would. Freedom in scheduling is important and a great perk of homeschooling. But be careful to not let that freedom come at the price of not actually doing the work. 2) Having a set structure and doing your best to maintain it will make things run more smoothly for both you and your child. Yes, there are exceptions!!!! 3) Establishing expectations for your child, age level appropriate of course, will help with the day to day schooling. 4) Tests do need to be introduced to your child at some point so they can learn how to study and take tests. College will be very difficult if they do not master this task. Personally, I think third or fourth grade is a good time to start if they have not been before. They don’t need to be five-page exams, but your child should slowly start understanding the process. 5) Spelling and grammar matter. Repeat after me. Spelling and grammar matter!!!!!! 6) Memorize those multiplication and division tables. I cannot stress this enough. Yes, calculators will most likely be at their disposal, but your child should know the times tables. It will be embarrassing for them as an adult if they don’t know what 3x8 is. 7) In my opinion, core subjects, such as math, science, grammar, and history should be taught through twelfth grade, regardless of credits needed to graduate high school. 8) Your goal is to have a child who can work independently by the time they reach high school. Hand holding and helicopter parenting will not serve them well during these years. High school needs to be a time of transition so when they move on to college, trade school, or their first job, they know what it means to be self-motivated. 9) Make sure your child is around other children their own age, whether in local sports, activities, church, or even the children in your neighborhood. They do need socialization for proper development, although it doesn’t need to be in the form of public or private school. 10) Always be willing to adapt and try new curriculum or teaching methods, per individual child. Putting them in a cookie cutter learning style takes away from some of the benefit of homeschooling.

I also want to share with you those things that won’t make or break or child’s education. Most of these I was at one time or another concerned with. Now that I’m on the other side, I realize that they just tend to work themselves out.

1) “Scheduled” pre-school will not affect your child’s SAT scores. Pre-school, if doing any, should be fun and exciting. It’s ok. Deep breaths. Let them be kids. And don’t worry when you hear what all the other kids in the neighborhood are doing at their pre-school. 2) Don’t get bogged down with worksheets during the pre-school years, unless your child thrives on having fun pages, like simple tracing, coloring, and shapes. Otherwise, don’t worry about them. There will be time for that later. Instead, do lots of games and manipulatives to build cognitive and physical development. 3) Kindergarten through second grade does not have to take all day. Seriously. Two hours can be enough time for them to learn. If you complete your curriculum for the day in that amount of time, adding unnecessary work will not make your child smarter. TRUST ME!!!!! 4) Tests are not imperative with the very early years. Remember, since you are the teacher you will know what your child is grasping. Tests are needed for the traditional classroom, but you are not the traditional classroom. It’s ok. Relax. Tests can come later. 5) Your child will learn to read if you are patient. If you suspect a learning disability, seek help. But all children will learn differently. My two older children were reading short vowel words fluently by age three and were very good readers by kindergarten. My youngest was five before he could grasp the concept of short vowel words. And I used the same system and method. Guess what? He caught up. All my children have very good comprehension, even my youngest. 6) Your child may not love all subjects in school, and this does not mean you aren’t doing something correctly. 7) Your typical school day may not look like any other homeschool family’s school day. As long as your child is learning, it doesn’t matter. 8) Do not compare how your school day looks with public school. You don’t want public school, correct? Stop worrying about what they are doing over there and focus on your child. 9) Don’t worry about what they are teaching in public school with what you’re teaching. No, you don’t want to “fall behind” but if you’re using good curriculum, your child will be just fine and most likely even more prepared when they graduate. 10) Don’t take it as a personal attack if your child dislikes a certain subject. There may be times to make some adjustments here and there, like trying another curriculum, may help. But just like those children who go to school often have a favorite and least favorite subject, so too will your child. This isn’t a reflection on you.

Remember that if you are willing to dedicate yourself to homeschool, that means that you care. Make it count. Give your child the best that you can offer. Don’t view this as a side hustle, as your child’s education depends on it. When you understand what to focus on the most it will make your job so much easier. You can do this!