MARGARITAVILLE MEMOIRS THE SECOND 2004 QUARTERLY PUBLICATION OF THE PARROT HEADS OF THE SAVANNAH RIVER-“PROUDLY SERVING THE CSRA”

....the sun goes slidin' 'cross the water AIKEN / AUGUSTA sailboats, they go searchin' for the breeze....

but “ Math Sucks”. In 2003, our club donated over $3000.00 in money/supplies and 319 hours

for our local charities. CAPTAIN’S LOG- 2004 Your Capt’n- “ Fins Up” Connie It was great to see everyone at our last meeting. I would like to welcome our newest VICE PREZ- “THERE’S JUST TO MUCH TO member, Mona. And it was nice to finally meet SEE WAITING IN FRONT OF ME” Billy and Belinda. I think we are going to have a Karl Keene –CONCHMAN’S CORNER productive year and have a lot of fun too. We HELLO PARROTHEADS- got things started on the right foot with our We as a club have welcomed in “2004” with a garage sale. I'm not sure what the final tally was lot of great ideas. Our charities for the year are: but it should be at least $150.00, not bad for two MCG/Phlock Together Bird Rescue/Children’s hours, unfortunately the rain came. We need to Place/ Leukemia Walk/SPCA-both sides of the thank Jana for opening up her party house to us river. Isn’t it great to help and give back to our and for cooking the dogs. I want to thank community? Way to go. And we also had fun everyone that participated to make it a success. doing it. April is going to be a busy month with If we have enough interest we can make this an concerts in Columbia and Charlotte, the Beach annual event. Upcoming events: Ball for MCG. The Beach Ball will be at the April 9: A1A will be at Last Call, Washington Rd. Richmond Hotel on 4-30-04. The club will be Let me know if you are interested I think holding a Silent Auction- so be thinking of any Jonathon is offering some free tickets. items you wish to donate. If there are questions- May 22: Luau at the Fox's Lair. More info to contact me. come, just keep this date in mind. This year is turning out to be one of our best yet. June 10- 13: Parrot Stock at Ocean Dunes Goes to show you what happens when the best Resort, Myrtle Beach, SC. If you are interested Parrot Heads are in ONE CLUB!! It was an go to www.parrotstock.com. No Internet, ask me honor being your Vice Prez in “03”. And as we and I'll help you. sail on in “04” with the wind at our backs and Now, for the big news, "State of the Pluck" report from PHIP. In 2003, Parrot Head Clubs the sun on our faces, helping the CSRA, we do collectively raised for and /or donated to so with a Buffett in our heart and a smile charitable organizations a whopping on our faces. Thanks to all. $1,658,469!!!! Additionally chapters worldwide donated approximately 365,088 hours to civic, Karl environmental and other philanthropic activities. I tried to figure out how many years it would take one person to work (40 hr/wk) that many hours,

OUR LAST PHLOCKINGS

UPCOMING PHLOCKINGS

APRIL 17TH-- “PHLOCK TOGETHER”- BIRD JANUARY- GENERAL MEETING AT RESCUE AUCTION. - BRING ITEMS TO MEZCAL’S. AUCTION. MEZCAL’S-5 PM. RAFFLE TICKECTS WILL ALSO BE SOLD. BILLY AND BELINDA HAVE DONATED FEBUARY-GENERAL MEETING- SEVERAL ITEMS FOR THE AUCTION FROM NOMINATION OF OFFICIERS. DISCUSSION OF THEIR LAS VEGAS TRIP. CLUB FUND RAISERS FOR THE YEAR. APRIL 29TH- BUFFETT CONCERT IN COLUMBIA, SC. MARCH- ELECTION OF OFFICIERS. APRIL 30TH- THE BEACH BALL AT THE CONGRATULATIONS TO OUR OFFICIERS. RICHMOND HOTEL. THEY ARE: PRESIDENT- CONNIE JOHNSON, VICE PRESIDENT- KARL KEENE, SECRETARY- MAY-15TH - GENERAL MEETING – 5PM- BECKY WORTHY, TREASURER- JANA MEZCAL’S TH TH ANDERSON, EXECUTIVE COMMITTEE- JUNE 5 & 6 - ANSWER PHONES FOR SUSAN BAROCK, CHARLIE JONES, BARBARA THE CHILDREN’S MIRACLE NETWORK, ZMIJEWSKI, SUSIE SADOWSKI, JOHNNY JUNE 10TH-13TH- PARROTSTOCK- MYRTLE JOHNSON. PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CALL BEACH. SEE INFO IN “DIS AND DAT”. ANYONE OF THEM FOR INFORMATION. JUNE 19TH-GENERAL MEETING – 5 PM- MEZCAL’S. BRING PET FOOD, TOYS OR MARCH 6TH- CLUB YARD SALE- “OUR TREATS FOR THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY. TRASH IS YOUR TREASURE”. THE CLUB RAFFLE TICKETS BEING SOLD AND ITEMS RAISED $219 ON THE EVENT. SOME FOLKS AUCTIONED. RAISED ENOUGH $$ TO HAVE A JULY 17TH-CHRISTMAS IN JULY- “AT “THROWBACK” WEDDING. WE HOPE TO JOHNNY & CONNIE’S”. BRING SCHOOL HAVE ANOTHER ONE THIS FALL. SUPPLIES FOR THE CHILDREN’S PLACE OF AIKEN. ALSO BRING A $10 GIFT/PERSON FOR OUR CHINESE GIFT EXCHANGE (ANYTHING TROPICAL/BUFFETT RELATED).

ANY ONE WHO WISHES TO DONATE TREASURES TO OUR “PIRATE CHEST”- FEEL FREE TO BRING TO ANY MEETING. PAGE 2- “AS A DREAMER OF DREAMS” We Are the People Our Parents Warned Us About Volcano Tour Names from Past Tours Where's the Party by Let it Ride and the 2003 - Tiki Time Tour 2002 - Far Side Of The World Tour 2001 - 2001: A Beach Odyssey Tour Fins 2000 - Tuesdays, Thursdays & Saturdays (CHECK OUT THE 1983 ARTICLE FROM 1999 - Tour BUFFETT”S CONCERT IN AUGUSTA, GA.-ON 1998 - Carnival Tour SUSAN’S ARCHIVES PAGE) 1997 - Havana Daydreamin' Tour 1996 - Tour MAKE YOUR OWN SET LIST 1995 - Domino College Tour 1994 - Fruitcakes On Tour The rules are you make your own live set list, 1993 - Chameleon Caravan Tour but you can only use one song per . You 1992 - Recession Recess Tour can use the compilations and live . 1991 - Outpost Tour 1990 - Jimmy's Jump Up Tour Down To Earth: 1989 - / Acoustic Evening A WHITE SPORT COAT AND PINK 1988 - Hot Water Tour CARINATION: 1987 - A Pirate Looks At 40 Tour LIVING AND DYING IN ¾ Time: 1986 - Tour A1A: 1985 - The Sleepless Knights Tour Havana DAY DREAMIN: 1984 - The Feeding Frenzy Tour CHANGES IN LATITUDE CHANGES IN 1983 - Somewhere Over China ATTITUDE: 1982 - Homecoming Tour : 1981 - Tour Volcano: 1979 - American Tour/ Tour/Volcano Tour Coconut Telegraph: 1976 - Pink Crustacean Tour Somewhere Over China: : AUGUSTA, GA 12/10/83 : SOMEWHERE OVER CHINA Last Mango: Manana Floridays: Growing Older But Not Up Hot Water: Son of a Son of a Sailor OFF TO SEE THE Lizard: Migration Feeding Frenzy: BOATS, BEACHES, BARS AND BALLARDS: Fruitcakes: Grapefruit-Juicy Fruit : The Lawyer and the Asshole Banana Wind: Why Don't we Get Drunk and Screw Carnival: BEACH HOUSE ON THE MOON: One Particular Harbour TUESDAYS,THURSDAYS &SATURDAYS: When Salome Plays the Drum Far Side: MEET ME INMARGARITAVILLE: Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes : Stars on the Water I Can't Tell You Why Cowboy in the Jungle Banana Republics Havana Daydreamin' MY WHOLE WORLD LIES WAITING BEHIND Cowboy in the Jungle DOOR NUMBER 3

and the boss is a jerk. Just want to disappear Wishin' I was DIS AND DAT COMES somewhere AND GOES other than here!

1. Jimmy Buffett comes in at number 17 on Rolling Living for the weekend, Stone's Rocks Rich List, not a bad haul to have so jumping off the deep end, much fun! with just enough money to buy A license to chill 2. The Boston Courant reported that Fenway and I believe I will Park has applied for permits to host two concerts this September 10th and 12th. Jimmy Let the rat race run, roll around in the sun Buffett who has been "banging down the door" to play, may get his wish. Permits need to be until approved but if they do, as the paper said Trouble turns funny, get sung "Fenway Park Will Be Margaritaville." a little bit of money, the nights still young Leave me alone I've got a license... 3. license to chill When: Tue, May 11, 2004 Event: "License to Chill” gets released KC: Details: Buffett\'s new album due out! Girls, girls, girls Ain't nothin' like`em in the whole wide 4. This year's ParrotStock will be held at world the Ocean Dunes Resort in Myrtle Beach. Somethin' smart and cute The special "ParrotStock 2K4" rate for and its amazing what they pass off as a rooms there are $128 per night based on bathing suit 2 people in a room, (each room has 2 Winners and losers (losers) "extra long" double beds), each additional sailors and cruisers (cruisers) person is $10 per night. They also have 2 We're all qualified for a license to chill and 3 bedroom villas with 3-4 beds. Tell and I believe I will them you are attending "ParrotStock." 1- 800-726-3783 or click on the web site link Let the rat race run, roll around in the sun -ParrotStock Registration. Amounts are: until $35.00 if postmarked before January 31, Trouble turns funny, songs get sung 2004 a little bit of money, the nights still young $40.00 from February 1 until May 1, 2004 Leave me alone I've got a license... $45.00 after May 2, 2004 a license to chill You may check out these web sites for more info; "www.sandsresorts.com" and Bridge "www.parrotstock.com JB & KC: 5. License to Chill by Jimmy Buffett (featuring ) License to chill and I believe I will Jimmy Buffett: Let the rat race run, roll around in the sun until Work, work, work A big pile of it PAGE 4- OFF TO SEE THE LIZARD Trouble turns funny, songs get sung One good song (?) lasts all night long leave me alone I've got a license to chill license to chill

JB spoken word:

Ramos, go rent me a coupe deville! Hey JL, where's that bar-b-que grill?

Head on down to Margaritaville.

Have me a cheeseburger with a big pickle dill. And in the 2004 Sports Illustrated’s Swimsuit Jesus, I sound kinda mentally ill. Issue, Buffett has an article and a CD Rom with I guess I better go turn on Doctor Phil. a teaser for the song’s music video. In addition to the free preview CD of Buffett's new album, the new 6. In the 8:30 half-hour of the Today Show, Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue also contains an Carson Kressley from article by Jimmy Buffett on tarpon fishing in "Queer Eye" did a feature on the Oscar Parties. Anegada (British Virgin Islands). When he showed clips from the Vanity Fair Cheers. party, there were Jimmy Buffett and his wife

(in a tux)! th 11. Jana had surgery on March 12 . Seems when the anethesologist came in to “drug ”her 7. How tall is Jimmy Buffett? up, he wanted to give her a martini. She told him she wanted margaritas. So when he came back Over 5' 7" in with the “cocktail”, he asked “Are You Ready To Go To Margaritaville?” GET WELL – JANA- 5' 7" We Love You.

5' 6" 12. On the song "Mind to" on 's 5' 5" newly released CD "Spend My Time", he mentions many "things" he'd like to do, "if he Under 5' 5" had a mind to." One of those mentioned is to "Front the Coral Refer Band." 8. JIMMY BUFFETT was nominated in four categories for his duet with - “It’s th 13. (TAKEN FROM LULU’S WEB)- Lulu’s is all Five O’Clock Somewhere” for this year’s 39 Annual Academy of Awards. about family and in its own way is a family SINGLE OF THE YEAR, SONG OF THE YEAR, business. It just so happens that the family VOCAL EVENT OF THE YEAR AND member who is my partner is known in one out ACM/LAUNCH VIDEO OF THE YEAR. LIVE of every eight households in America. To you, TH MAY 26 AT 8 PM ON CBS. he’s Jimmy Buffett. To me and my sister, Laurie, he’s simply Bubba. A year or so ago, 9. HERE’S DETAILS FOR THE SPECIAL there was an editorial in one of the local SHOW WITH 3 ACTS PERFORMING: JIMMY BUFFETT,WITH ALAN JACKSON AND papers about Jimmy, criticizing his lifestyle, his irreverence, his immaturity, his lack of SATURADAY, MAY 29TH 2004 intelligence and education, and his arrogance TEXAS STADIUM on commenting about some political reference of the day, since he was a dumb, almost rock- 10. After teaming with Alan Jackson for “It’s star who needed to grow up. Jimmy Buffett is Five O’Clock Somewhere”- Jimmy has recorded a duet with Kenny Chesney- “License to Chill”- PAGE 5- “DOWN AROUND BILOXI”

fifty seven years old and has been married to some of our best friends are Republicans! his wife Jane for over 26 years. He has three Jimmy Buffett is not a saint. He’ll be the first to beautiful children for whom he cooks breakfast admit it. He’s much more comfortable with the and drives to school many days a week when reputation of being a fallen altar boy. He works he is not on the road. He has been working hard and likes his job. He learned that from since he was twelve. He threw papers, bagged our father. He inspires millions of people to groceries at Delchamps, was a welder’s helper stop and smell the roses or more accurately to at Alabama Dry Dock and Shipbuilding feel the sand under their toes. He believed in Company where our parents worked for 35 Lulu’s from day one. He will not give you a years. He has a BS degree in History and handout. He’ll give you an opportunity. He worked as a reporter for Billboard Magazine. won’t do it for you but he’ll help you. He’s wise He has worked in the music business for over that way. To him and to the many people who 35 years. He has sold millions of albums of appreciate him I owe a world of gratitude. If songs that he primarily wrote. He has had two growing up is NOT doing the above, I hope I national best selling books. He runs a multi- never grow up! There are many people who million dollar corporation that has diversified have made Lulu’s what it is today and like into merchandise, restaurants, tequila, shrimp, every awards show, there is not time or room and I don’t even know anymore what else. He here to mention them all. But there is one loves to surf. He’s an awesome poet. He sent person directly responsible for Lulu’s even my children to college, along with many other being here at all…and that is Mac McAleer. It is kids who have needed help. He has a his fierce passion, blind perseverance, brilliant foundation that gives away millions of dollars creative mind, and generous heart that is each year earmarked for families, children, responsible for you being able to enjoy the animals, the arts, and the environment. The new and improved Lulu’s. When I lost the first house he ever bought was for his wife. lease, I was ready to let go of Lulu’s but he The second was for our parents in Daphne on saw the possibilities that I didn’t see. He knew the water. It was their dream and they named what I didn’t know. He nudged me, pulled me it Homeport. They were able to retire and along and eventually dragged me, sometimes enjoy the rest of their lives in comfort. He kicking and screaming, into the realization of always included them in his exciting travels my dream. You don’t know him by name but and adventures. When they became ill and you know the American icon he re-invented: their physical mobility was limited, he bought the Krispy Kreme HOT NOW glazed donut. It’s them another house in Point Clear so that they probably known in one out of every two homes could be closer to the water. They named it in America. He has a PHD in Family Business. Point Homeport. In the last ten years of their One of his earliest memories is being in his lives, he provided them both with twenty-four father’s Krispy Kreme franchise at the Loop in hour care so that they would never have to Mobile when he was three years old. He went leave the Homeport they cherished until they to work in the business in his teens and died. (Which they both did last year.) Jimmy is continued working for Krispy Kreme for thirty not afraid to have public and political opinions. something years becoming the CEO and taking Even if it results in hard consequences, like not the company public. He retired and moved having his sister’s restaurant’s lease renewed back to the Gulf Coast to do what he loves to by the State of Alabama. He learned that from our mother, who at 16 gave her high school commencement speech on the power of the people to change government for the better Who knows why you start rediscovering with the power of the vote. She also taught us your heart, you just do it again and to accept, respect, and love people no matter again... their race, religion, or political orientation. Why PAGE 6 do: live by the water and play with boats. He Tuesday, August 31 , OH - Riverbend (On Sale built my exquisite restaurant and he is building 3/13) a first-class, clean-green marina next to it, which he has graciously named Homeport. For my family and our friends, Homeport will be that “one particular harbor” that keeps Peets and J.D. Buffett alive for all of us. Every nuance that makes Lulu’s so exceptionally special was his thought and vision. Without him, none of this would have happened. He is my business mentor, my companion, my teacher, my inspiration, my very worthy Scrabble opponent, and my best friend. He has enriched my life and made me a better person. There will never be enough words to thank him for helping me reach beyond my potential into living my dream. Lulu’s is more than a restaurant. It is a story filled with the lives of the people it touches. It is what makes it so unique. It is what gives it such a flamboyant personality. It’s an example of the little engine

that could. It is all about heart and love. It is a privilege to share it with you and thank you for helping us write the next chapter. JIMMY AND KENNY

Life is short. Live well!

14. SUMMER TOUR-- Tuesday, May 18 - Denver, CO Pepsi Arena (On Sale 3/13) Thursday, May 20 - Minneapolis, MN - Target Center (On Sale 3/13) Saturday, May 22 - Columbus, OH - Schottenstein Ctr (On Sale 3/13)

Wednesday, May 26 - , GA - Hi-Fi Buys Amph (On

Sale 3/6) Tuesday, June 29 - Camden, NJ - Tweeter Center (On Sale 3/13) Thursday, July 1 - Cuyahoga Falls, OH - Blossom (On Sale TBA) Saturday, July 3 - Bristow, VA - Nissan Pavilion (On Sale 3/13)

Tuesday, July 6 - Indianapolis, IN - Verizon Wireless (On

Sale 3/20) “ If our lives were that simple we’d live in Thursday, July 8 - Indianapolis, IN - Verizon Wireless (On the past” PAGE 7 Sale 3/20) Thursday, August 26 Chicago, IL - Tweeter Center (On Sale 3/13) 15. Full Name - James William Buffett 17. Has anybody ever heard the David Allen Born - December 25th, 1946 Coe song "Jimmy Buffett Don’t live in Key West Birthplace - Pascagoula, Mississippi Anymore"? A GOOD ONE. Parents - James Delaney and Mary Loraine th Buffett 18. Jimmy’s new book due out May 4 . Wife - Jane Previous Marriages - 1 19. Kenny Cheseny recently updated a Buffett Children - Savannah Jane, Sarah Delaney, 1974 song- “Come Monday” for his 5 song CD, Cameron Marley “Kenny Chesney Uncovered”. Available only at First Album - Down To Earth Target as an extra on his new album- “When The Sun Goes Down”. Copies of Down To Earth Sold - 324

Latest Album - Meet Me In Margaritaville: The 20. Margaritaville- Myrtle Beach- light opening in Ultimate Collection June. Grand opening in July. Copies of MMIM Sold in First Week - 127,000

First Song on Singles Chart - Come Monday, 1974 First Top 10 Hit - Margaritaville, 1977 21. An article from the News Journal Last Top 10 Hit - It's Five O’clock Somewhere (delawareonline.com) (with Alan Jackson) Jimmy Buffett sues Hockessin eatery # of Songs on Singles Chart - 6 (Come Says 'Margaritaville' name is his Monday, Changes in Latitudes, Margaritaville,

Fins, Cheeseburger in Paradise, It's Five O’clock By MARY ALLEN Somewhere. # Of Albums Made - 30 Staff reporter Best Selling Album - Songs You Know By 02/05/2004 Singer Jimmy Buffett wants a federal court to Heart prohibit a Hockessin restaurant from calling its outdoor bar # of Gold Albums - 6 "Margaritaville," the name of his 1970s' ode to a frozen # of Platinum or Multi-Platinum Albums - 8 tequila drink. Number of Music Awards Won - 1, CMA Award for Vocal Event of the Year with Alan Buffett sued Samantha's Cafe and owner Mark Chew in U.S. Jackson, It's 5 O’clock Somewhere. District Court on Monday. He claims the Samantha's First Margaritaville Location - Key West, 1985 Margaritaville area of the eatery on Lancaster Pike violates a # of Margaritaville Locations Now - 8 trademark he holds on the Margaritaville name. Latest Margaritaville Location - Las Vegas, Chew, 41, said he would not fight the world-famous singer in 2003 # of Books Written That Topped NY Times court. He's changing the bar-area name to Samantha's Best-Seller List - 3 Patio. # of Other Authors Who Have Had #1's on "I'm just here to make a living and obey the law," said Chew, Fiction and Non Fiction List - 5 whose business is named for his daughter. Two Of Those Authors Include - John The lawsuit filed by Wilmington attorneys Cathy Reese and Steinbeck, Ernest Hemingway Charles Michael Terribile on Buffett's behalf seeks a court order barring Chew and the restaurant from using the 16. (FEB 12, 2004) Jimmy Buffett appeared on the "Where in the World" Today Show Margaritaville name in any way. It also seeks unspecified segment with Matt. The segment was damages and attorney fees. being broadcast from Necker Island. The lawsuit contends Chew ignored a letter sent to him in Jimmy sang "Changes in Latitudes" in one October demanding he cease using the name. Reese and segment and Matt mentioned the new Terribile could not be reached Wednesday, nor could a album " License to Chill". Later Jimmy spokesperson for Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville clubs. came back with Mac McAnally and Ralph McDonald and performed "License to Chill". On the segment at 10 am Jimmy played "Come Monday", requested by Matt PAGE 8- “QUIETLY MAKING NOISE” Lauer.

Buffett wrote the song "Margaritaville" in 1977, according to CAPTAIN TOM’S CUISINE- the lawsuit, and it went on to become one of his most successful recordings. He sings of being "wasted away (aka- “DADDY RABBIT”) again in Margaritaville" and has cultivated the name so that it “THE KING OF SOMEWHERE has great value for use by restaurants and bars with which HOT” he is affiliated, according to the lawsuit. There are Margaritaville nightclubs in Jamaica, Mexico, Key BEER BUTT CHICKEN 1 whole chicken –3-5 lbs (minus head, feet, guts West and Orlando, Fla., and Las Vegas. and feathers) Chew said he added the outdoor bar last year after A 16 0z can of your favorite beer. (I had to settle Delaware legislators outlawed smoking at indoor bars and for my least favorite because my favorite only restaurants. He serves flavored margaritas from mixes with comes in bottles). the Margaritaville name. A liquor distributor suggested he Garlic (as much or as little as you desire) About a half of a stick of butter name the bar in honor of the drinks, he said. 1 lemon "I didn't know I made a mistake," he said. He used the name on T-shirts, two signs and Carefully remove the top of the beer (I still have advertisements. He said he would pull the signs this week. scars) and drink about 1/3 of it. Add chopped The bar is closed now until spring. garlic to the remaining beer (in a cup). Again the amount is left up to you. Here comes the fun The lawsuit alleges patrons have visited Samantha's part…. –set the chicken over the can. Yes, that’s Margaritaville thinking they were headed for a Buffett-related right- “up the you know what”. Close off the neck venue, only to be confused. Chew said his bar bears no flap with wooden toothpicks (plastic ones melt all photos of Buffett, and he doesn't own any of the singer's over the bird). Place the bird (still standing on music. He questioned whether patrons would really think the can) in an el cheapo aluminum-baking dish (keeps the grill cleaner). Use the legs of the bird Buffett had a restaurant in Hockessin, when his other outfits and the beer can as a tripod. Melt the butter, are in places such as New Orleans and Las Vegas. some garlic and lemon. Put the baking dish with "I don't think it's a metropolis," he said. the chicken still standing on the beer can on the grill. You may have to remove the top rack of the grill because you need to cook this sucker on a closed grill. Baste the bird with lemon/garlic often – about every 5- 10 minutes or when it’s time for another beer. Cook until juices run clear from the bird- about 1- 1-½ hours (you can cheat and use a meat thermometer). You may also experiment and use a mixture of other ingredients like minced onions/soy sauce/ sesame oil/ginger root- whatever floats your ship.

PAGE 9- Let the Good Times Roll, Let the Fun Begin!

BUFFETT PHILOSOPHY (STUFF BUFFET SHOULD USE TO MAKE MUSIC FOR MONEY)

DEMOCRAT AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You have two cows. You sell one, lease it Your neighbor has none. back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd You feel guilty for being successful. one. You force the two cows to produce Barbara Streisand sings for you. the milk of four cows. You are surprised ------when one cow drops dead. You spin an - announcement to the analysts stating REPUBLICAN you have downsized and are reducing You have two cows. expenses. Your stock goes up. Your neighbor has none. So? ------SOCIALIST FRENCH CORPORATION You have two cows. The government You have two cows. You go on strike takes one and gives it to your neighbor. because you want three cows. You go to You form a cooperative to tell him how to lunch and drink wine. Life is good. manage his cow. ------JAPANESE CORPORATION - You have two cows. You redesign them so COMMUNIST they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary You have two cows. The government cow and produce twenty times the milk. seizes both and provides you with milk. They learn to travel on unbelievably You wait in line for hours to get it. crowded trains. Most are at the top of It is expensive and sour. their class at cow school. ------CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE GERMAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, buy a You have two cows. You engineer them so bull, and build a herd of cows. they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give ------excellent quality milk, and run a hundred - miles an hour. Unfortunately they also DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE demand 13 weeks of vacation per year. You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government. ------BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours the milk down the drain.

PAGE 10- “BAROMETER SCOOP”

ITALIAN CORPORATION OH THE STORIES WE COULD TELL While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman. You have two cows but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch. Life is good. ------RUSSIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You have some vodka. You count them and learn you have five cows. You have some more vodka. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have. ------TALIBAN CORPORATION You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two. You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's I LIKE MINE WITH LETTUCE AND private parts. Then you kill them and TOMATOES claim a US bomb blew them up while they were in the hospital. ------IRAQI CORPORATION You have two cows. They go in hiding. They send radio tapes of their mooing. ------FLORIDA CORPORATION You have a black cow and a brown cow. Everyone votes for the best looking one. Some of the people, who like the brown one best, vote for the black one. Some people vote for both. Some people vote for neither. Some people can't figure out how to vote at all. Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which is the best-looking cow. WE ARE THE PEOPLE OUR PARENTS WARNED US ABOUT

------

CALIFORNIA CORPORATION

You have millions of cows. Most are illegals. Arnold likes the ones with the big tits.

COWBOY IN THE JUNGLE EVERYBODY’S TALKING

I LOVE THE NOW- MOTM 2003

DIAMOND AS BIG AS THE RITZ

NEW MEMBERS-BILLY AND BELINDA- WELCOME ABOARD- “WHERE’S THE PARTY”?

I’M GROWING OLDER BUT NOT UP- MY METOBOLIC RATE IS PRESENTLY STUCK

WELCOME RAMONA - “IT’S MY JOB-A LABOR OF LOVE”.

CAPT’N TONY- A WHITE SPORT COAT

I’VE GOT A PBS MIND IN AN MTV WORLD NIBBLING ON SPONGE CAKES

I DON’T KNOW AND I DON’T CARE BOAT DRINKS - WAITRESS I THINK I NEED

TWO MORE BOAT DRINKS

WE THE PARROT HEADS OF THE The next Sunny Jim CD is called Live Crab. It is recorded SAVANNAH RIVER DEDICATE THIS live from Capt. Curts in Siesta Key Florida. It will be available NEWSLETTER TO JUSTIN AND HIS starting March 1st. Please visit www.sunnyjim.com FAMILY.

If you’re planning on going to MOTM this year, REGISTER soon ! Don’t wait or you’ll be stuck here ! If any of you are planning on going and can’t get the registration form off the website, let me know & I’ll get one to you.

PLEASE REMEMBER JUSTIN AND HIS FAMILY IN YOUR THOUGHTS,

PRAYERS AND “TOASTS”- AS HE LEAVES/PREPARES FOR THE UNITED STATES NAVAL BOOT

CAMP IN ILLINIOS. WE SALUTE YOU, JUSTIN. “ANCHORS AWAY”. MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND KEEP YOU FROM HARMS WAY.

EDITORS NOTE- WE ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR PHOTOS OR ARTICLES IN THE PUBLICATION OF THIS NEWSLETTER. WE, AS PARROTHEADS, ONLY PRINT WHAT WE PHOTOGRAPH, WHAT IS SUBMITTED TO US AND WHAT WE HEAR ON THE COCONUT TELEGRAPH. ALSO, WE ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR TYPO’S-IT’S YOUR WRITING OR MY INDULGENCE OF TO MANY CORONA’S- YOU CHOOSE. “OUR LIVES CHANGE LIKE THE WEATHER-BUT A LEGAND (YOU-THE

PARROTHEADS) NEVER DIES”. MYRA