Butenis, Patricia
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The Association for Diplomatic Studies and Training Foreign Affairs Oral History Project AMBASSADOR PATRICIA A. BUTENIS Interviewed by: Charles Stuart Kennedy Initial interview date: September 11, 2014 Copyright 2020 ADST INTERVIEW th Q: OK. Today is the 11 of September, a date that will live in an infamy. Interview with Patricia A. Butenis. And I am Charles Stuart Kennedy and this is on behalf of the Association of Diplomatic Studies and Training. This is our first interview. And do you go by Pat or Patricia? BUTENIS: Pat is fine. Q: Well Pat, let’s start at the beginning. When and where were you born? th BUTENIS: I was born in Philadelphia, October 13 , 1953. Q: OK. Let’s get a feel for your family. What do you know about the Butenis side of the family? BUTENIS: My father’s side emigrated from Lithuania, but we don’t know much about them. My father’s mother, a tough woman, outlived three husbands and had two children, my father and his half-brother, my Uncle Tony. We didn’t know anything about any relatives back in Lithuania and regretfully never thought to ask. My father’s mother lived with us and spoke what used to be called “broken English” so we could not communicate well. My mother’s side of the family comes from Ukraine. Her maiden name was Michalezka. That was the side of the family that we knew most about, gravitated toward. My mother’s mother emigrated with her husband about 1913, probably, leaving behind two children, Ivan who was already in the Tsar’s army and not allowed to emigrate and a daughter, Priyanka, who may already have been married. My mother was the only sibling born in the U.S. and since she spoke and wrote Ukrainian was the link to the family in Ukraine. Q: Now, what was your family, Ukrainian Orthodox, Jewish, what? BUTENIS: Ukrainian Catholic with allegiance to the Pope. We followed some of the Ukrainian Catholic traditions at Christmas and Easter. 1 Q: What was the neighborhood like? BUTENIS: My parents bought property we still own, about 10 acres in South Jersey, which was at that point very, very rural, and moved out of Philadelphia when I was about six months old. My father worked for what was then the Evening and Sunday Bulletin newspaper. He was a paper handler which involved moving huge rolls of newsprint paper off the trains that delivered them and moving them to the printing presses. Dad was also an official in his union and I think that’s why I have had a pro-labor bias, especially when serving overseas. Dad used to take us on family days to tour the pressroom and see the printing presses. My mother was a housewife who had finished ninth grade in school and who took care of three daughters and two grandmothers. Dad finished high school but was unable to go to college. I think he was accepted at Penn but didn’t have the money for tuition and his mother insisted he get a job. My father’s dream was to live in the country and have a garden and so he had his job during the day, but he loved to be home growing vegetables. He presented my mother with all this produce to do something with (laughs). And so we enjoyed lots of canned and preserved delicacies from the garden. We also had a variety of animals: chickens, ducks, hamsters, cats, dogs, parakeets, you name it. We were all animal lovers. It was very nice. In fact, I’m building a house there for retirement I give my parents a lot of credit for their emphasis on the best education possible for their three daughters, at a time when boys were getting much more attention. They really sacrificed to put us through parochial school which at the time was considered a better education than the public schools. I remember Dad always telling me that with an education I could be independent. Q: OK, well let’s talk about this growing up period. Were you living in a rural environment? BUTENIS: Yes, South Jersey, Camden County which still has lots of farms. My town itself, Atco is pretty much blue collar, and many people remain there to raise their own families. They go to school, high school, maybe some college. It’s not a particularly prosperous area. It’s halfway between Philadelphia and Atlantic City. Q: Well, as a girl what were you up to? Let’s start with elementary school. BUTENIS: My sisters and I went to the local Catholic school, Assumption School which was run by nuns, the order of Immaculate Heart of Mary. They were tough women, strict disciplinarians and of course parents sided with the nuns. If Sister Theresa said you were doing X, then you were doing X. No whining, take your punishment. Q: Today the parents arrive with a lawyer to -- BUTENIS: Exactly. If Mother Augusta said you were talking in line and you got whacked on the butt, then you deserved it. 2 Q: Were you much of a reader? BUTENIS: Yes, I was a bookworm. I was introverted as a child and while I can’t say I loved school, I did very well. One of my fondest memories is the family going grocery shopping Friday night and I would get to buy a book from the children’s book display. My father loved to read too. Q: OK, let’s talk a little bit about reading. Do you recall some of the first books you were reading that stuck in your mind? BUTENIS: Wizard of Oz, Heidi, Nancy Drew, I loved that series. My father had his own collection, leather-bound classics with his nameplate in each volume. I loved those books. I would dip in as soon as I was old enough to understand. I remember reading Black Beauty, and while I don’t remember much about the story, I remember Ginger the horse died and I was so upset that I told my father -- and I remember him comforting me about it. So I’ve been surrounded by books my whole life. Q: Well, did books about foreign areas -- BUTENIS: No. Not at all. I didn’t have any particular wanderlust. I just read mostly literature. But in high school I started studying Spanish. I went to an all girls’ Catholic high school. My class had 45 girls. Looking back, I realize it was good that I went to an all girls’ school because I was very shy and as a smart kid in a small school, I was thrust into leadership roles. The teacher said “You will represent the school at X” or “you will be president of this group”, and I got involved in activities and assumed leadership roles that I don’t know I would have sought out in a larger school. Q: Well, I’ve never asked this question before, and of course a number of people, myself included, we were, you know, sort of shy and kind of forced to do things. Can you figure out why you were shy? I mean -- BUTENIS: Looking back, my parents were both quiet people although my mother was fairly social. I think it’s just a function of personality. We had a pretty normal upbringing for that time, although financially it was a struggle for my parents. As you know, when you join the Foreign Service you take the Meyers-Briggs test and then again at different points in your career. I migrated from being a strong introvert to an average balance between introvert and extrovert. I think it reflects learned behavior, that you cannot be a successful FSO and not learn to reach out to people, to take the social initiative. Q: I know it. Well, going to a cocktail party, you sort of steel yourself and think, “Oh, here we go.” BUTENIS: And often in another language, sticking out your hand, “Hi! I’m so and so” and you learn to do it. But I can’t say I ever enjoyed it. 3 Q: What about the other kids around you? I mean were there -- I’m using the term in the good sense -- were there sort of gangs of kids and were they ethnic -- BUTENIS: Atco at that time was heavily Italian American and at least half the kids in my class had Italian last names. Their grandparents had emigrated, many from Sicily and many bought farms. There was a small Slavic community, our family and some other Ukrainian and some Polish families. There was also an African American community, West Atco, but I don’t know if it was a separate municipality or not. The whole area was mostly blue collar, working class. Q: Did Russia play a role in some of the family discussions? BUTENIS: No, and as far as I can recall, the letters we received from my mother’s family in Ukraine never mentioned anything political, it was all family news. We just assumed that the Soviet authorities read the letters although I don’t think we had any proof or even discussed it. Now I am the one who keeps up the contact but in English. There is someone in our family’s village who reads and writes English and they translate for our relatives. When I look back on it now, having been a consular officer, I guess my mother could have sponsored her siblings for immigration but I don’t think they would have been allowed to leave the Soviet Union, and the issue never came up.