VOU CAN RUN FROM LECTURES, STUDENT SCUMi BUT THINGS HAVE < CHANGED ROUND HERE.' THERE'S NO ESCAPE FROM CRACCUM!

MARCH 1, 1988 FREE - PLEASE TAKE ONE, OR TWO, OR Stress: The condition produced when the mind overrides the body's desire to choke the living shit out of someone who definitely deserves it.

Craig Elliot

Indulgence

Well, here we all are then (more ly (Ed's note: yeah, like once a only decided on 2 days before and if that doesn't grab your atten­ or less). Your intrepid editors have day), and Miriam did all the work, deadline, which was quite unex­ tion then give us a few ideas by finally got all their shit together to which even included tidying up the pectedly brought forward because writing a letter or three, at least bring you this first exciting edition office, a truly momentous feat. we wanted to use full colour so you'll see your name in print, but of Craccum 1988, ta dah. The last couple of days have that did put the pressure on rather make sure you read the whole Since exams (boo, hiss) last year, been at Red Alert as we try and get a lot. Anyway we survived, just! paper from cover to cover FIRST, Wendy has been traipsing around all the articles in, type them, lay So, have a good read people, OK? India, Carl went bush at Kawrua, them up and get enough adverts to check out the Orientation guide Gort went to the Kiwi (R.I.P., 5 keep us going for the rest of the on the centre pages, the Yours literarily minutes silence please) occasional­ year. Our marvellous cover was Kamasutra article on pages 8 & 9 the Ed's (not Mr Ed)

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Really groovy cover ...... 1 Thanks heaps to all the people who wrote stuff for us - Stu Mon­ tgomerie, Daphna Whitmore, Mary McGeever, Phillip Wong-Toi, Contents ...... This is it! Gina O'Shea, ourselves of course and whoever else I've missed Indulgence ...... To your right out. Thanks to Kerry for doing our budget and for his advice, to Credits ...... To the south-east Pat Stodart for taking Carl on the wine crawl, to George for sav­ ing us from mental breakdowns by doing the cover and the col­ Freshers' pack ...... 3 our, to Raf for the political stuff, and also Peter for his great art­ Show and Tell ...... 4 work and headings - Happy 21st by the way! Ta to Biddy and Dia ...... 4 for their help and supplying us with graphics. Ta to Barbara Hen­ Slings and Arrows ...... dry for typesetting and to Putaruru Press for multiplying this copy Five go Wino in Henderson ...... 5 8000 times - provided we ever make it there. Music ...... 6-7 P.S. Thanks also to Alistair J. Kamasutra Feature ...... 8-9 Bullshit (Politics) ...... Editors: Miriam de Graaf, Carl Fagan, Simon Holroyd, Wendy ...... 11 Lawson. Orientation Guide ...... 12-13 Advertising Manager: Anthony Gibbons Chaplain's Chat ...... 15 Bad Press ...... 15 Arts ...... 16-17 Sport ...... 19 Stuff (Notices) ...... 22 „ Letters ...... 23 Concise Alphabetical Index Make your own! Back Cover ...... Guess

Craccum is a source of free expression and information for Auckland University Students and the University community. Craccum is not the official publication of the Auckland Universi­ ty Students' Association or of the University of Auckland. Both bodies may not endorse or agree with opinions expressed within Craccum, and neither necessarily do the editors. In fact, if the editors are actually aware of what has been written it is purely Remove this coating of ideology unfuck its false needs accidental... what editors? f'-JZI imposed by leisure reality." s n s UNIVERSITY CF AUCKLAND LIBRARY 2 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 on h s C FRESHERS FUN PACK NO!! Sorry to disappoint you, Most of the first years seemed to fellow students, but it's not the sort know where Registry, the main of forum you find in naughty cafeteria and Shadows are, but not magazines. It is in fact the usual many knew where to find the sort of thing we do at this time of A.U.S.A. President's office (the year where we ask people what Science block end of the AUSA they think/thought of enrolment. building, ground floor) or Craccum This time we've also asked a few (AUSA top floor between BFM and freshers (ie 1st years) if they know Student Travel). If you're still con­ the whereabouts of various impor­ fused, have a look at the orientra- tant places around campus. tion handbook (Transition 88) There was a wide variety of com­ pages 40-41, available at AUSA ments on this years enrolment, reception. such that we feel that to draw any Mike (& shy friend) 'Faster, boring, 'Quicker this year' Peter conclusion either way would be un­ justifiable (we were very fortunate in being able to find a fence big enough for all of us to sit on!). Anyway here's a few comments along with a couple of photos of 'Felt apprehensive of the number of people' the few people who let us snap them. The marked reluctance of the majority of those interviewed to ap­ pear in this newspaper was most evident (especially the women, in­ And now here's a more official view cluding one of the editors!), let us of this years enrolment: There 'Organised, especially compared hope this degree of shyness should have been more assistance to Tech.' evaporates during the year. (Ed's to 1st-years, it didn't help that the 'Maths dept sucks' Gina note: the Classoc orgy would cure handbook was not sent out this this), I mean we're a respectable year but had to be picked during publication aren't we?? enrolment instead so that many The first-years we talked to were were unsure of where they were (not surprisingly) generally a bit going or the clubs they wanted to bewildered by the first experience join. The womens questionnaire of varisty, but as we noticed no survey complicated and confused signs of impending nervous things for the A.U.S.A. section of breakdowns or racing home to enrolment, and the organisation of mum we'll have to assume that A.U.S.A. Executive members to they all survived and will now man the desk there was left too breeze through the next few years late. just like the rest of us. Geraldine Ryan (Ed's note: you must be kidding!!!). (Welfare Officer) Damon(L) & Jerome 'Good service' ® going' Monique

SUNGS AND ARROWS

A Tale of Two When the people in the occupied monetarism was baloney. He writes: ‘Our package, which countries resisted, they were called ‘Once again, as with monetarism, art in limbo../ Countries terrorists by Israel. Israel’s allies, par­ supply-side theory has hit New Once upon a time there was a coun­ ticularly a big country which coveted Zealand years after it has been re­ jected for sound practical reasons in The NZ Herald reported on 8.2.88, try called Nazi Germany. The rulers the Oil of the Middle East, said ‘Yes, other parts of the world... that the Minister of Finance, Mr told the Germans they were a master they are terrorists, we support you.’ Douglas, went solo again in the latest race, and they should have more They forgot to add: ‘You are our for­ lebensraum (living space). So they ward base for controlling Middle- round in the flat tax rate wrangle ‘He ‘It occurred to me that many of the went out and conquered a lot of near­ Eastern Oil.’ said, yesterday, that no-one - ‘not even young gentlemen of Treasury went by countries to get it (So they said). me or the Prime Minister’ was in a through university when Friedman When other countries protested, the position to judge sensibly the merits The Israelis put up buildings in the and Art Laffer and their theories were Germans said ‘It’s in the book of our of the economic package.’ occupied territories but they called the latest fad and they have not yet Great Leader, ‘Mein Kampf,’ that we The lame leading the blind? No, them refugee camps’, not ‘concentra­ had time, or perhaps the inclination, have a right to colonies and territory’. the blind leading the blind! tion camps,’ where they put the peo­ to read the later writings to those who When people in the occupied ter­ ple they called terrorists. They used have torpedoed the theories and ritories fought to get their home against these people a policy of chronicled the disasters which occur­ countries back they were called ‘ter­ ‘might, power and beatings’. They red when they were tried in practice.’ rorists’ by the Germans. The Ger­ also shot many and had a secret So how does Sir Rob explain his mans’ allies said, ‘Yes, they are ter­ police called ‘Shin Beit’. own support for monetarism in the rorists, we support you.’ past, and his near worship of Zionists and Zionist supporters, monetarist Maggie? The Germans put up buildings and please note. places they called ‘concentration We can agree that disasters occur­ camps’ where they put the people they red (in NZ, too) when monetarism called ‘terrorists’. And they used was applied in practice. But then, against these people a policy of where is the bourgeois economic ‘might, power and beatings.’ They Short Memory Division theory that doesn’t end in disaster? also shot many and had a secret Has the agile Muldoon invented it? police called the ‘Gestapo’. There was a time when a certain Only in his own mind. gentleman named Muldoon (that was Later on, after Nazi Germany was his given name not the name that peo­ Lament for the Fallen defeated in war, there was a country ple gave him) used to preach and called Israel set up in the Middle East. practice a doctrine called Oh, pity the yuppie The rulers told the people they were Once so highly-placed, ‘monetarism’, invented by a guy nam­ the Chosen People, and they should ed Friedman, for which the latter was Once upwardly mobile, have more living space, to protect Now downwardly chased. awarded the Nobel Prize. Ir lose themselv es. So they went out and days our ex premier used to say that conquered nearby countries to get it. the person he most admired in all the But why should we cry When the people of those countries If his income should drop? world was Mrs Thatcher, the most protested, the leaders of Israel said: famous apostle of monetarism. When the yuppie cares only ‘It’s ;.n the book of our religion, that For being on top. once we had all this territory over two thousand years ago. It is plain it Judge our surprise to read in the is rightfully ours.’ star of February 7 that, for him,

4 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 On a wet, miserable Wednesday in February, four disaffected In time we arrived at Corbans students and Bazza the koala bear- Wines, where we were faced with sell wine cooler so even the plebs bag went west in search of affor­ a daunting task. All the could find something to suit. The dable, agreeable and interesting establishments we had visited service here was friendly but alcoholic bevies being offered for before it was possible to taste vir­ oriented towards selling although sale in the chateaux of Auckland's tually anything you might be in­ this was the first place to give us Bordeaux region Henderson. This terested in. Corbans was huge! all (except Bazza) a glass each. suburban and industrial arm of our Because Corbans own a number of Wobbling out of Corbans we made great mecapolis still contains the other wineries such as McWilliams, a pit stop at a takeaways to give the remnant vineyards of the pjoneer Cooks and Stoneleighs, there are at driver a bit of something to soak up Dalmation vinterons. Within 30 least four different Chardonnays to the trendy chemical aid he had minutes of our ivory tower lie eight try as opposed to just the one. But quaffed. Then it was off down class establishments and many we persevered and discovered a Henderson Valley Road to the next smaller 'domestic' wineries. variety of good wines (not cheap house of wine, Pleasant Valley but worth it). Prices are not Vineyards. bargain-basement but the quality wine-making involved and the fact This was probably the most Following the map provided free that many of the vintages are bizarre place we stopped at on the by the Information Centre in Aotea vinted from Hawkes Bay grapes trip. The various blends were not so Square, we proceeded down the justified this to some extent. This much impressive as completely dif­ north-west motorway and off at was the only winery based shop to ferent. We tasted quite a bit as the the Lincoln Road off-ramp. Only 100 metres later on the left was our service was relaxed and friendly and eventually we ended up buying first stop. Collard Brothers. This, as a couple of sauternes and a very with all wineries mentioned in this nice fume Blanc. Not much here in article, has sales and tastings from the dry white realm. Last stop that 9am to 5pm Monday to Saturday. day was the infamous Babich With fresh untainted palates we entered... unfortunately it was the wines, where we tasted some ab­ solutely top quality wines. Yes, this wrong place to start. Staff interest was the real thing. The service was and knowledge was vestigial. Apart brilliant as was the top quality pro­ from a cabernat merlot/sauvignon duct. Tasting was no prob lem even which was pleasant (although over­ with the more expensive wines priced) we were not impressed. Personally, I was impressed by a such as the Irongate Chardonnay at $18.50 a bottle (which by the way very dry Rhine Reisling, not so the is worth every cent but by this time rest of the party. I was skint). Many of the wines available were from Hawkes Bay vineyards, and both Henderson Not more than 50 metres down the road was our next stop - one of Valley and Hawkes Bay wines were available in the same grape varie­ Auckland's lesser known traditional wineries. Soljans Wines. The ser­ ty. Overall, price wise, produce vice was excellent, the wines wise, the place was fucking amazing. overall quite pleasant, and they did not mind us tasting anything we wanted. There were some great The whole trip took about four specials of which we took advan­ hours and cost for one of us tage. Ports and sherries seemed to nothing at all, for another just over be their speciality, but for great $100. Bazza left his cheque book at bargains and thoroughly drinkable home. It really is a bloody fun thing wines this place is worth a visit. A to do one afternoon - especially drinkable semilion at only $4.95 during the week as you avoid all the and a two litre carafe of palatable tourists. Take a bit of money to buy port for only $11.30. Great! the odd bottle and take a tip from us.... start at Babich Vineyards first.

Next on our journey after some considerable argument (the driver claimed he had to eat something urgently), we stopped at Lincoln Wines, an impressive winery with a tasting area overlooking the vats. sh o a l This winery had some very in­ mceo m teresting wines and at bloody good computerpackages prices. In the reds, 'Brighams Creek', a cabernet merlot/pinot which was bloody amazing. Also available was a merlot, interesting to find a pure merlot wine. A short Ask about our special conference decided that Brighams Creek was a good wine to drink student package deals now, and the merlot could do with a few years upside-down in the on Commodore products. wardrobe. In the white department their wines were pleasant but not PLUS a great range inspiring. Of great interest however, was their 'Ice Wine' which unfor­ of options. tunately unavailable for testing, but an unusual sticky wine not com­ Available now at your mon among NZ wineries. On a totally irrelevant note they have University computer changed their labels to a rather trendy image which will look good services centre. on the coffee table when you invite your commerce student friends round for drinkies. Buy any package and Cr Commodore* be in the draw to win Commodore Computer (N.Z.) Ltd. P.O. Box 33-847, Auckland 9, N.Z. Telex: CBM NZ 63118. Telephone: (09) 410-9182. Fax: 410-9189. $500 CASH. TCC UNI

CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 5 Y.J

Campus Radio BFM is the student radio sta jtion here on campus, situated on the second | floor of the Student Union building. They [specialise in playing alternative music, in­ cluding a large percentage of NZ music and stuff that commercial radio stations don't have the sense to play. $3 of your Students Y Association fee that you pay at enrolment goes towards BFM, so make the most of it, whether it's by getting involved or by tuning ī ■ô in to 91.8 FM.

ECAL SHow s

MONDAY: SATURDAY: 4-7pm Berlin Club Show 7-9pm Land of the Good Groove WEDNESDAY: with Murray Cammick SUNDAY 9-10pm The New Release Show 7- 8pm The Top 13 with Lee 8- 10pm with Colin Hogg Freak the Sheep - Kiwi 7-10pm Classical Show 10-11pm The Concert Programme music show with Lisa 10-11am Slightly Silly Show 11pm-1am Hours on End - ambient 10pm-1am The Atmospheric Show 11am-12.00pm The Culture Bunker - music Featured Artists THURSDAY: 12.00pm-2pm Sunday Brunch - jazz, blues| ! TUESDAY: etc 7-9pm Playground Show 2-4pm Blues Anytime 7-9pm Audible World with Ross 9-10pm African Music Show |4-6pm Country Show Clark 6- 7pm Dr Glee's 60's Show 9-10pm The 50's Show FRIDAY: 7- 9pm Sound System - reggae 10pm-1am The 'Pull it Down Show' 9-11pm Simulcast of Radio With imports etc with Michelle 7-8pm Kii Ra Pictures on the 'Comfort McGill. 10pm-2am Thrashy Show Zone'

On Wednesday 9th of March Campus Radio |6: The Advertising Department BFM will be holding an Introductory Meeting. Do you want to meet interesting and ex­ It's for all people who would like to become citing people, AND take money off them., then involved in a student radio station, and there BFM join up with the Advertising Department. We are a number of areas where people can need lots of people to help sell ads in order to assist. help the station survive. And the best thing is INTRODUCTORY that you actually receive money for doing it! 1. THE FEATURES DEPARTMENT This is the department responsible fo* the! MEETING The introductory meeting is being held on information side of Campus Radio, and it has| Wednesday 9th of March at 6.30pm in the many areas for involvement. cafe (hopefully); and is open to anyone in- a) Newspeak: This is our regular current affairs |terested in working at the station. programme, which focuses on issues that 3: The Production Department And now for some news. Campus Radio is] aren't commonly found in the commercial When you watch all those pathetic adverts I Inow broadcasting from a high powered media. on television., do you ask yourself 'I could transmitter in the Waitakere's and we should b) Art Bulletin: This show previews, reviews write better stuff than that'. If you do why not be able to be heard throughout the metropolis | and talks to people in many areas of the Arts come up to BFM and write ads for the produc­ - the money for this has come from a $3 stu­ - for example: theatre, movies, painting, tion department. We have a very professional dent levy, but our normal day to day running sculpture, dance etc. studio that churns out heaps of adverts every I is financed through advertising. c) University Focus: This includes coverage of | week. The production staff will give you all the And we have just launched the B-Card, student news and information, interviews and necessary information and you can design an I which is subscriber radio for BFM listeners. For | broadcasts of lectures by visitors on campus. [epic ad... but remember you've got to com­ just 20 dollars students will be able to receive The aim is to promote the accessibility of the press all your brilliant ideas into 30 seconds [ I discounts at various retail outlets in Auckland University's services and resources to or less. .(movie theatres, night clubs, clothing stores, students and non-students in the Auckland record shops, hair salons etc). They'll also be | community. [ 4: The Publicity and Promotions Department | eligible to win over 1000 free albums and d) Entertainments: Interviews and information This is the department that brings to you giveaways, receive a BFM newsletter, and I on entertainment in Auckland, as well as news [epic evenings such as the BFM disco and the I [have the opportunity to have a say in BFM's on what's happening in NZ and overseas. Campus Radio 'Gigs'... as well as everybody's programming. We've introduced the B-card in Training in interviewing, production, copy favourite multi-coloured BFM tee-shirt. If order to supplement our advertising revenue writing and voice work will be starting the you've got a sound knowledge of the New so that we can continue the growth that has| week after the Introductory Meeting. Anyone Zealand music scene and are keen to promote [ been occurring in recent years. can be involved although it helps to be either New Zealand music and entertainment.. we| In order to apply for a full-time (365 day) I A) a BFM fan or B) someone who has initiative could use your help. warrant from the Broadcasting Tribunal we and is prepared to work hard... and preferably The department is also involved in produc-| have set up the Campus Radio Trust. A major both. Expert studies have shown that par­ ing BiFiM magazine. If you'd like to contribute| feature is a more stable managerial structure, ticipation of the News Department leads to items, or help in some way come to BFM.... created by placing 5 experienced andl many opportunities for further involvement in 5: The Programming Department: knowledgeable radio and management people the station. This is the department if ya wanna be a d.j. I ('the Trustees') in charge of the overall I As this is very popular we do ask a couple of decision-making process. Another feature is 2: The Technical Department things from prospective announcers. Most im­ the formalizing of our training procedures so If you're a person who loves building and portant is that you are a regular listener of BFM as to introduce a greater number-of students fixing electronic equipment., and would like a and have a well-rounded knowledge of all to the station. It is hoped that the Trust will challenge, then the technical department types of music - especially New Zealand significantly improve the behind-the-scenes wants you. We maintain megadollars of audio 'material. It would also be extremely useful to running of the station, which has until now, and radio equipment as well as designing and j provide a (home recorded) voice tape in order lagged behind the progress in the on-air soundj building gear for special purposes. So come to be sure you have the ability to speak on air of the station. up and see Rick in the back of the newsroom - (We're not looking for a 'hip' voice but for| anytime, or come to the Introductory meeting. the ability to speak coherent sentences!). Stu Montgomerie CRACCUM March 1 1988 BILLY T.K. and WHAREMANA

PINK FLOYD fed along a wire until it reached about I ...or should that be Pig Floyd? Talk midway across the stadium and then about bringing home the bacon! For retreating again. It was the sort of oc­ those of you who didn’t make it there, currence that tended to grab your at­ I am of course talking about the tention somewhat! This led straight] into ‘On the Run’ with a video of One of the highlights of the Orien­ Floyd’s Western Springs concert on tation Mardi Gras will be Billy T.K. Jan 22. Surely this was the concert of Nick Mason in a hospital bed mov­ ing along the corridors of a hospital and Wharemana, a group of musi­ the summer not to be missed (so how cians and dancers performing a con­ (!) and at the end a similar bed, which come there were only 60,000 of you temporary Maori music show with there hmmmm? Anyway, on with the the more observant members of the audience had already noticed hidden funk, jazz and rock. review. As soon as the majority of the The major product of Mere Pro­ crowd were settled (?) the amongst the trees, came flying across the stadium to stage left where it ductions, this company aims to pro­ quadrophonic speakers came into life mote the talents of Maori and Euro­ with a few aircraft noises which I am disappeared in a blinding flash (yes I know it’s a bloody cliche but it really pean performers, and particularly in told were a pretty unnerving ex­ the field of contemporary indigenous perience if you were wasted. Follow­ was pretty extreme on the old eyeballs, OK?). The rest of the set in­ music. In this project, they are pro­ ing this the large round video in cen­ viding employment as well as inspira­ tre stage came on with a vid of Nick cluded such classics as ‘Wish You Were Here’, ‘Money’, ‘Another Brick tion and encouragement to many peo­ Mason rowing, seemingly endlessly, ple in the South Auckland area. Pity, along a river, as ‘Sounds of Life’ in the Wall’ and ‘Comfortably Numb’ which very appropriately ended the there isn’t a market for this kind of played on the main speakers. This led project on a large scale as it would into the classic Floyd track ‘Shine on show; encores notwithstanding of course. provide a kind of employment that you Crazy Diamond’ as the band ap­ would be confidence-building, ex­ peared on stage. The break which followed was so pressive and creative. The rest of the first set was mainly long that many people started to leave The programme features the material from their latest album ‘A but just when it seemed that it was all original music of Billy T.K. in which Momentary Lapse of Reason’, the over, Pink Floyd returned for a cou­ contemporary Western music merges highlight being Dogs of War accom­ ple of well received encores. The se-> with Eastern and Maori themes. Bil­ panied by a great video of red-eyed cond of these was ‘Run Like Hell’, ly’s career spans some twenty years, alsatians charging headlong towards much to the enjoyment of yours tru­ having played in concert with Split the screen. After about W i hrs there ly as it was one of the songs played Enz, Elvis Costello, Renee Geyer and was a break so that the band could in all the promo ads. Black Sabbath. The other musicians recuperate while the fans relaxed, all have years of experience, both came down or got UP again. And that was it. The excellent within NZ and internationally. The second set featured work from sound system, the video, the lasers Their music features powerful the big-3 albums ‘Dark Side of the making patterns on the trees at the rhythms and fine vocal harmonies, Moon’, ‘Wish you were Here’ and back of the stand, a flying pig and and is accompanied by dancing, ‘The Wall’ and at the same time the bed, it was just such a great evening, centering around traditional Maori special effects became extra-special. even the weather stayed fine and dance form with influences of im­ The following portion of this warm. Compared with previous con­ ported dances of jazz, rock and even may not be strictly or factual certs at the Springs there were few ar­ rect due to circumstances beyo rests (disorderly conduct and can­ ballet. authors control (if you know \ nabis possession) which made it that Billy T.K. and Wharemana are em­ barking on several fund-raising ven­ mean). much better for the rest of us who tures this year, the first being at the The first song after the break was, didn’t get caught or were well- Mandalay Cabaret on Friday March I as I correctly guessed, ‘One of These % behaved^). Hopefully they’ll keep, 4, and then at the Orientation Mardi Days’, followed by ‘Time’ (???) at Jtheir promise to return in the not-too- which point the aforementioned pig distant future, hopefully with Roger Gras on Sunday March 6. (giant size and pink) floated into the Waters back in the band, that would) [stadium from stage right and travell-| be perfect.

CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 7 In the west the kamasutra is life of a citizen, his or her com pa­ a creeper. is called the 'embrace of the synonymous in most peoples nions, amusements and so on. Vriskshadhirudhaka, or climbing breasts'. mind with sex and although it is The largest part of the book a tree. (4) When either of the lovers easy to understand why this con­ deals with the technicalities of Tila-Tandulaka, or the mixture of touches the mouth, the eyes, and nection is m ade it is nevertheless sex and whilst the other aspects sesame seed with rice. the forehead of the other with his an over simplified and limited are dealt with in away out of sync Kshiraniraka, or milk-and-water or her own, it is called the 'em­ view. It is a widespread with todays society it is still rele­ embrace. brace of the forehead'. misconception that the vant that the Hindus believed (1) When a woman, clinging to Some say that even shampoo­ Kamasutra is solely about sex one could not view sex in a man as a creeper twines round ing is a kind of embrace, and the variety of positions that isolation. a tree, bends his head down to because there is a touching of can be employed with well over It has been repeatedly and hers with the desire of kissing him bodies in it. But Vatsyayana thinks 100 positions outlined in detail. correctly said that Hinduism is a and slightly makes the sound of that shampooing is performed at Although it may come as a ma­ way of life rather than a religion Sut, sut, embraces him, and looks a different time, and for a dif­ jor disappointment to some of with a certain clearly defined lovingly toward him, it is called ferent purpose; and as it is also you more athletic of you, and a creed. The ancient Hindu's look­ an em brace like the 'twining of of a different character, it cannot relief to those of you who turned ed at the nature and functioning a creeper'. be said to be included in the em­ your mind inside out trying to of human life in a scientific way. (2) When a woman, having brace. There are also some think of the many possibilities, They attached importance to placed one of her feet on the verses on the subject, as follows: there are not 100 plausible posi­ what a man should do rather foot of her lover, and the other on 'The whole subject of embrac­ tions for sex unless you have a than what he should believe. In­ one of his thighs, passes one of ing is of such nature that men double jointed spine, thighs, deed, according to them a her arms round his back, and the who ask questions about it, or shoulders etc etc. The mention of man's credo must be the result of other on his shoulders, makes who hear about it, or who talk the word kamasutra brings out a rational thought and rational slightly the sounds of singing and about it, acquire thereby a variety of reactions the most deeds, not a blind faith in a god cooing, and wishes, as it were, to desire for enjoyment. Even those common is a fit of the giggles, whose existence must be ac­ climb up him in order to have a embraces that are not mention­ you may also have foolishly ex­ cepted in defiance of the kiss, it is called an em brace like ed in the Kama Shastra should the 'climbing of a tree.' posed yourself to the scrutiny of evidence furnished by reason be practiced at the time of sex­ every sex maniac in the room and perception. These two embraces take ual enjoyment, if they are in any (how every many rugby players The best way to provide an in­ place when the lover is standing. way conducive to the increase of are present) by making them sight into the Kamasutra is to print (3) When lovers lie on a bed, love or passion. The rules of the suspect you're one too, or so­ an excerpt. The following and embrace each other so Shastra apply as long as the pas­ meone may tell you that they've material is taken from part two: closely that the arms and thighs sion of man is middling, but when of one are encircled by the arms got one too but their's didn't On Sexual Union. the wheel of love is once set in bloom this year but they've been and thighs of the other, and are, motion, there is then no Shastra told they have a beautiful bud? Chapter II as it were rubbing up against and no order'. The Kamasutra is essentially a On the Embrace them, this is called an embrace guide to social interaction bet­ like 'the mixture of sesame seed ween the sexes and was written The em brace which indicates with rice.' Chapter III as the ancient hindu's believed the mutural love of a man and (4) When a man and a woman in the wisdom of the dictum - if a woman who have come are very much in love with each On Kissing thing is worth doing it is worth do­ together is of four kinds: other, and, not thinking of any It is said by some that there is ing well. Western women have Touching pain or hurt, em brace each no fixed time or order between been attempting to convince Piercing other as if they were entering in­ the embrace, the kiss, and the their male counterparts of this for Rubbing to each other's bodies either pressing or scratching with the sometime, Hey You and then a Pressing while the woman is sitting on the nails or fingers, but that all these two minute dash for the goal line The action in each case is lap of the man or in front of him, things should be done general­ is behaviour best restricted to the denoted by the meaning of the or on a bed, then it is called an ly before sexual union takes rugby field. word which stands for it. em brace like a 'mixture of milk place, while striking and making Western society in the past but (1) When a man under some and water'. the various sounds generally to a lesser extent in the present pretext or other goes in front of or These two embraces take takes place at the time of the decade believed the man in the alongside a woman and place at the time of sexual union. union. Vatsyayana, however, street should not be allowed a touches her body with his own, it Babhravya has thus related to thinks that anything may take pee into the close preserve of the is called the 'touching embrace'. us the above eight kinds of place at any time, for love does laboratory of sex. Such, however, (2) When a woman in a lonely embraces. not care for time or order. was not the attitude of the an­ place bends down, as if to pick Suvarnanabha, moreover, On the occasion of first con- ( cient Hindu's. Their enquiring up something, and pierces, as it gives us four ways of embracing gress, kissing and the other things I mind probed into the secrets of were, a man sitting or standing, simple members of the body, mentioned above should be sex with the same frank, open- with her breasts, and the man in which are: done moderately; they should minded thoroughness which return takes hold of them, it is The em brace of the thighs not be continued for a long time, characterised their conduct called a 'piercing embrace'. The em brace of the jaghana, and should be done alternately. when dealing with sculpture, These two embraces take that is, the part of the body from On subsequent occasions, astronomy or philosophy. They place only between persons who the navel downward to the however, the reverse of all this did not impose any crippling do not, as yet, speak freely with thighs. may take place, and modera­ taboos on their research nor did each other. The em brace of the breasts tion will not be necessary; they they feel in any way inhibited (3) When two lovers are walking The em brace of the forehead may continue for a long time; when talking of sex or matters slowly together, either in the dark 1/2(1) When one of two lovers and for the purpose of kindling allied to sexual processes. To or in a place of public resort, or presses forcibly one or both of love, they may be all done at the them sex was a normal function in a lonely place, and rub their the thighs of the other between same time. of nature and, like all other func­ bodies against each other, it is his or her own, it is called the 'em­ The following are the places for tions of nature, there was a great called a 'rubbing embrace'. brace of thighs'. kissing: the forehead, the eyes, deal about it which was hidden (4) When on the above occa­ (2) When the man presses the the cheeks, the throat, the and mysterious. Sex was not view­ sion one of them presses the jaghana, or middle part, of the bosom, the breasts, the lips, and ed as an- isolated technical other's body forcibly against a woman's body against his own, the interior of the mouth. event but as an important aspect wall or pillar, it is called a 'press­ and mounts upon her to prac­ Moreover, the people of the Lat of social interaction between the ing embrace'. tice, either scratching with the country kiss also the following sexes and so the Kamasutra does These two last embraces are nail or finger, or biting or striking places: the joints of the thighs, not deal solely with Sex but also peculiar to those who know the or kissing, the hair of the woman the arms, and the navel. But Vat­ deals in depth with the following: intentions of each other. being loose and flowing, it is call­ syayana thinks that though kiss­ On the means of attracting At the times of meeting, the four ed the 'embrace of the jaghana'. ing is practiced by these people others to yourself, on the ar­ following kinds of em brace are (3) When a man- places his int he above places because of rangements of a house and used: breast between the breasts of a the intensity of their love and the household furniture; on the daily Jataveshtitaka, or the twining of woman and presses her with it, it customs of their country, it is nof 8 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 race of the fit to be practiced by all. Now, with a young girl there if the lovers are three sorts of kisses: he eyes, and The nominal kiss other with his The throbbing kiss lied the 'em- The touching kiss »ad'. (1) . When a girl touches only >n shampoo- the mouth of her lover with her : em brace, own, but does not herself do touching of anything, it is called the 'nominal ciyana thinks kiss'. oerformed at (2) When a girl, setting aside id for a dif- her bashfulness a little, wishes to i as it is also touch the lip that is pressed into iter, it cannot her mouth, and with that object ed in the em- moves her lower lip, but not the also some upper one, it is called the 'throb­ it, as follows: bing kiss'. ;t of embrac- (3) When a girl touches her re that men lover's lip with her tongue, and about it, or having shut her eyes, places her or who talk hands on those of her lover, it is thereby a called the 'touching kiss'. it. Even those Other authors describe four not mention- other kinds of kisses: astra should The straight kiss 5 time of sex- The bent kiss ey are in any The turned kiss ie increase of The pressed kiss 3 rules of the (1) When the lips of two lovers ig as the pas- are brought into direct contact ng, but when with each other, it is called a s once set in 'straight kiss'. n no Shastra (2) When the heads of two lovers are bent toward each- other, and when so bent, kissing takes place, it is called a 'bent kiss'. (3) When one of them turns up the face of the other by holding * that there is the head and chin, and then der between kissing, it is called a 'turned kiss'. kiss, and the (4) Lastly, when the lower tip is ling with the pressed with much force, it is call­ that all these ed a 'pressed kiss'. one general- There is also a verse on this sub­ 'mare's position. back all the time, it is called the When the legs are contracted, union takes ject as follows: When the legs of both the male 'turning position' and is learned and thus held by the lover before l and making 'Whatever things may be done and the female are stretched only by practice. his bosom, it is called the 'press­ js generally by one of the lovers to the other, straight out over each other, it is Thus, says Suvarnanabha, ed position. ) time of the the same should be returned by called the 'clasping position'. It is these different ways of lying When only one of her legs is a, however, the other; that is, if the woman of two kinds, the side position down, sitting, and standing stretched out, it is called the 'half- ig may take kisses him he should kiss her in and the supine position, accor­ should be practiced in water pressed position'. for love does return, if she strikes him he should ding to the way in which they lie because it is easy to do so When the woman places one ī order. also strike her in return'. down. In the side position the therein. But Vatsyayana is of opi­ of her legs on her lover's i of first con- i male should invariably lie on his nion that congress in water is im­ shoulder, and stretches the other e other things On the Various Ways of lift side, and cause the woman to proper, because it is prohibited out, and then places the latter on > should be Lying Down, and the lie on her right side, and this rule by the religious law. his shoulder, and stretches out they should is to be observed in lying down When a man and a woman the other, and continues to do so >r a long time, Different Kinds of with all kinds of women. support themselves on each alternately, it is called the 'split­ e alternately, Congress When, after congress has other's bodies, or on a wall or ting of a bamboo'. occasions, begun in the clasping position, pillar, and thus while standing When one of her legs is plac­ se of all this (1) When she lowers he head an the woman presses her lover with engage in congress, it is called ed on the head, and the other is 3nd modera- raises her middle parts, it is call­ her thighs, it is called the 'press­ the 'supported congress'. stretched out, it is called the 'fix­ cessary; they ed the 'widely opened position.' ing position.' When a man supports himself ing of a nail'. This is learned by a long time; At such a time the man should When the woman places one against a wall, and the woman, practice only. >e of kindling apply some unguent, so as to of her thighs across the thigh of sitting on his hands joined When both the legs of the ill done at the make the entrance easy. her lover, it is called the 'twining together and held underneath woman are contracted, and (2) When she raises her thighs position'. her, throws her arms round his placed on her stomach, it is call­ the places for and keeps them wide apart and When the woman forcibly neck, and putting her thighs ed the 'crab's position'. ad, the eyes, engages in congress, it is called holds in heryoni the lingam after alongside his waist, moves When the thighs are raised throat, the the 'yawning position'. it is in, it is called the 'mare's posi­ herself by her feet, which are and placed one upon the other, , the lips, and (3) When she places her thighs tion'. This is learned by practice touching the wall against which it is called the 'packed position'. the mouth, with her legs doubled on them only, and is chiefly found among the man is leaning, it is called the When the shanks are placed pie of the Lat upon her sides, and thus the women of the Andra country. 'suspended congress'. one upon the other, it is called the following engages in congress, it is called The above are the different When a woman stands on her the 'lotus-like position'. of the thighs, the position of Indrani, and this is ways of lying down, mentioned hands and feet like a When the man, during con­ lavel. But Vat- learned only by practice. The by Babhravya; Suvarnanabha, quadruped, and her lover gress, turns round, and enjoys the t though kiss- position is also useful in the case however, gives the following in mounts her like a bull, it is called woman without leaving her, while these people of the 'highest congress'. addition: the 'congress of a cow'. At this she embraces him round the »s because of There are also the 'clasping When the female raises both of time everything that is ordinarily • love and the position' and the 'low congress', her thighs straight up, it is called done on the bosom should be >untry, it is not and in the 'lowest congress', the 'rising position'. done on the back, together with the 'pressing posi­ When she raises both of her lover's shoulders, it is called the tion', the 'twining position' and the legs, and places them on her 'yawning position'. CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 9 mmm! w m m

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”A Glimpse Into the Mushroom", by Geoff Slater* This and other designs by the same artist are available in poster form from the CRACCUM office for six dollars..* 10 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 BURSARY BLOOZ As the government moves away from the Both the Government, and education concept of charging university students in­ groups (including NZUSA) recognise that creased tuition costs, 'user-pays or more the area of financial support for young commonly known as user goes bankrupt people is at present a hotch-potch mess. robs a bank and is now doing fifteen years', While tertiary students only receive $41, the area of student support and specifically people doing access can receive up to bursaries, will becom e increasingly the $100 or more. At polytech students doing area of conflict with the government. the same course can be entitled to widely A number of proposals put out by different assistance, while young people treasury and the Labour Government have who remain at school receive sweet F.A., i.e. already been tackled. In 1985-86 the con­ no incentive as fellow students who go on cept of Pay-back loans was first floated. The the dole receive $96 a week. idea was that either the Government or the The concept of a unified training Trading Banks or the A.U.S.A. Treasurer allowance, covering everyone, was first .would lend money at favourable rates raised by the Scott committee in 1985. It has (what the hell is a favourable rate of in­ since been incorporated into general terest) to University students, who would government thinking and in last then pay it back after graduation or exclu­ December's economic package the ter­ sion. To help disadvantaged groups, tiary reviews were somewhat circumvented special loan facilities would be m ade by the announcement that the tertiary bur­ available. sary and the Unemployment benefit would However, there seems little support for be equalised (the cat was thrown amongst loans in the Department of education for the pigeons). the privileged, the Department of Educa­ This does not mean however, that the bur­ tion for the under privileged was sacrific­ sary will be raised to the level of 118 p.w. ed during governmental cutbacks on the (the level of the dole for 18-20yr olds). recommendations for treasury such NZUSA has been told by the associate changes as these are inevitable when the minister Mr Goff that the Government can­ pinko's put a left wing government in not afford to pay 50,000 tertiary students power? Despite this lack of support treasury Hello All that much. It is almost certain that the dole is still obsessed with the idea of rich univer­ will be reduced and the tertiary bursary sity students 'capturing' all this government raised. Probably to a level of about $85-90. If this is your 1st year at varsity then money. Given the substantial growth in the young welcome... don't let the place overwhelm unemployed the government may well be you. The varsity year is quite hectic; you coming off better (and you just thought they may not think so yet but when you have to get those essays and assignments in, sud­ liked us!). NZUSA has joined other groups in oppos­ denly it will occur to you how little you know! ing the dole. The dole was set up as a bare Time management is important more so minimum that anybody could possibly be now if you have a part time job as well. If expected to live on (which says a lot for the you can organize yourself properly then bursary) and has been inflation indexed. So you'll have heaps of time to spend on yourself and others. students are in a difficult position. We don't want to disadvantage other younr people Many first years find that they can't hack (O.K. we know some of you are bouchoir the pace; if you feel it is too much then wankers) but we can hardly tell the govern­ come in and see us at the Student Union ment where to get off with a bursary office - we can at least point you in the right direction. increase. For those of you who are returning, have a good time - just think it's only 227 days till AND NOW, THE GREAT exams - there's plenty of time to worry about them later. HOUDINI WILL MAKE So far this year your executive and I have HiS MiRACULOVS ESCAPE Treasury would like to introduce means been concerning ourselves with such FROM THE DREADED details as - testing and stricter targetting of the bursary PiRANHAS ff.. 1. Student Job Search to help more disadvantaged groups Gust 2. The operating budget for AUSA like flat-taxes and higher G.S.T. on non lux­ ury items, right - on, such obviously socialist 3. Organising enrolment and Orientation inspired motives?) They have a point about 4. Co-ordinating action with the other fifteen inches. At present the bursary, 41 p.w. universities re: Issues concerning educa­ tion, welfare, overseas students and and 37.50 p.w. accommodation grant, is at women. such a low level that for many poorer 5. Organizing clubs and societies - affilia­ families sending their children on to further tion and grants. education and training is an impossibility. No amount of flash advertising campaigns The Marae has now been officially open­ will overcome the substantial financial bar­ h ed. There is still plenty of work for your ex­ ecutive to do on the above issues so if you riers and 'opportunity costs' of sustaining 3 years of tertiary study. On the other hand feel you can help out then please get in The best we can hope for is an inflation there is no doubt that there are students for contact with them. indexed adjustment this year, and a whom 41 p.w. is 'drinking' money which substantial increase in the bursary (to say EVP - Mark Barlow allows a bit more freedom and a lot more $90-95 which is inflation indexed). The m a­ OSO - John Utanga lost brain cells. jor fight will be over any targetting of the NAO - Nick O'Flaherty The New Zealand University Students allowance. It is very likely that there will be IAO - Graham Watson Association (NZUSA) has tried to confront WRO - Beatle Treadwell substantial means-testing of any increased this by ensuring that their members are not bursary and it is vital that we lobby early on EAO - Mary Atkinson disadvantaged by any changes while (now!) to ensure students will not be disad­ Socs Rep - Dave Stewart making efficient use of the State's money. vantaged by any changes. If you require Sports - Gina O'Shea In 1987 NZUSA employed a tax consultant any further information or wish to help lob­ Welfare - Geraldine Ryan to set up a 'taxable' bursary scheme which by please contact the E.V.P. Mark Barlow. His SRC - Graham Hackshaw would ensure a proper living allowance for MSOs - Marama Henare office is on the ground floor of the Student those receiving little or no help from their Union building. Whetu Netana parents while decreasing support using the tax system, for those receiving substantial Richard Foster support or earning high amounts of money AUSA President in term time. CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 11 1.00pm Quad THIS OUT OF THE COMPOST 9.00am Restaurant A Wellington acoustic quartet of original and varied music - from blues PANCAKE BREKKY 8.00a to ballads to poetry, including some 1.00pm Quad humorous and thought-provoking A free breakfast - cooked for you by ( your executive members! See if BIG MONOPOLY songs. Instruments include acoustic Where four renowned teams cop bass, cello and flute and a variety of they're as good (or bad) at cooking as they are at running the Student's upon a 5-metre-square board ush interesting percussive instruments. Association! less-than-traditional form of cum

1.00pm Little Maidment Theatre 1.00pm Quad 12.30pm Barbecue Area TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE S.R.C. MEETING JAZZ PICNIC WORLD S.R.C. is where you get your say in Sip genuine champagne at only$ Excerpts from Harry Holland and how AUSA spends your money. This a glass, munch on hors d'oeuvrei Glamlet - Harry Holland being the first first meeting will be a brief introduc­ sandwiches and cheese at $4.f and only Marxist leader of the Labour tion to the President and Executive so plateful and lie back to the soui Party. He is paid tribute to in action they can tell you who they are, what the jazz group Hattie and the H poetry and multi-media imagery. The they do, and apologise for burning the Eric Glandy Shakespearian Big Band pancakes that morning! present Glamlet, their country and S.R.C. happens every Wednesday, western version of Hamlet. $9, or $6 same time, same place, and among with Orientation Card.- student politics, gives you your chance to take part in a kazoo or­ 2.00pm Womenspace chestra, win a chocolate fish and 1.00pm Little Maidment Theatre VIDEOS other such weird and wacky things! TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE WORLD Showing 'Maids and Maidens' - a 1.00pm Little Maidment Theatre TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE documentary on black women Excerpts from Glamlet, the Eric WORLD domestic workers in South Africa, and Again - Eric Walks being the insu 'First Lady of Law' - the story of Ethel tion behind a religion that worst Excerpts from Harry Holland and Benjamin, the world's first woman Auckland City as its God. After af Glamlet. See Tuesday's agenda for lawyer. absence, Eric has returned as a thf details. $9 or $6 with Orientation Card. to redevelopers and demolishes j 2.00pm 91.8 on your radio dial. to save our city and bring it bac| TREASURE HUNT life! The Eric Glandy Shakespea^; Big Band present Glamlet, tf- Turn to Campus Radio BFM on your country and western version^ radio or Walkman and listen for clues Hamlet. $9, or $6 with Oriental}' to find the treasure of a $100 National Card. Bank account. 6.00pm Little Maidment Theatre 5.00pm Womenspace TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE WORLD WINE & CHEESE 8.00p K All women welcome, a chance to get Eric Walks Again and Glamlet - saf acquainted with Womenspace and v\3 as that on at 1.00, only the full shk the resources it has to offer. $12, or $9 with Orientation Car» 7.00pm Shadows | 5.30pm Human Sciences Building Quad WORK TO RULE ARCHAELOGICAL SOCIETY 8.00p BARBECUE 2.00pm Quad NORML DEBATE Costs $3 (sausages included). Alcohol 7.30pm Maidment Theatre FOLK CONCERT extra. $4 student membership. Norml, being the National Organisa­ tion for the Reform of Marijuana Laws, A journey in song through N+ 6.00pm Little Maidment Theatre hosts a debate - we can only guess Zealand's history. Starring NI TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE what the issue will be. wandering minstrel Mike Harding^, WORLD 6.00pm Little Maidment Theatre many others. $10, or $6 for Folk Gf TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE members and Orientation C * Featuring Glamlet and Harry Holland. holders. As above, but the whole show. $12 or WORLD $9 with Orientation Card. Harry Holland and Glamlet - See Tues­ 8.00pm St James 7.00pm Shadows day's agenda for details. $12, or $.9 LIMBS - NOW IS THE HOUR OUT OF THE COMPOST with Orientation card. II. A full evening programme of da|^. 7.00pm Shadows The original acoustic Wellingtonian choreographed by Limbs' highly if ENID's SORE THROAT quartet also playing in the Quad today. claimed 'wild child' Douglas Writ* and featuring the music of F Original music by an Auckland band. McGlashen as well as compos^ from Mozart to Nina Hag* 8.00pm Cafe $22.50/$ 19.00, or only $12 for Of* NORML DANCE tation Card holders. For Discounts The same people hosting the debate A on all events earlier in the day bring you a dance featuring Rick Bryant and the Jive 5 ^ 5 B N Z Bombers, and Nick Smith. YOUR BANK $10-oo ON CAMPUS

12 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 S !EEK 6.00pm Little Maidment Theatre ^ 6.00pm Little Maidment TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE WORLD 8.00am Shadows WORLD Variety Show. $12, or $9 with Orien­ CHAMPAGNE BREAKFAST Eric Walks Again, and Glamlet - see tation vned teams co Thursday's agenda. $12 or $9 with quare board usft Wake up with champagne, croissants, Orientation Card. rial form of cum- fresh fruit and coffee to the sounds of the jazz oriented band Straight No 12.00 Noon Rudman Gardens Chaser. Don't forget to wear your * 8.00pm St James MARDI GRAS Great Gadsby theme outfit. $12, or $8 * with Orientation Card. * LIMBS - NOW IS THE HOUR The Orientation Finale - heaps of * events around Rudman Gardens, and npagne at only$ * See Thursday's agenda. 1.00pm Quad * Quad and the BBQ area. Jools Topp n hors d'oeuvrei $22.50/$19.00 or only $12 with ANTIGRAVITY STILT THEATRE * from the Topp Twins will MC the stage cheese at $4.( * Orientation Card. programme. Featuring Billy T.K. and ack to the souij * Wharemana in a contemporary Maori attie and the Ho Amazing acrobatics and dramatic * theatre on stilts. * 8.00pm Maidment Theatre music show with funk, jazz and rock, * STALKER STILT THEATRE with JAY performed by accomplished musi­ * CLARKSON cians and dancers, Billy having played 1.00pm Maidment Little Theatre * with the likes of Split Enz, Elvis TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE * As Thursday's show. $12 or $8 with Costello and Renee Geyer. Also play­ WORLD * * Orientation Card. ing are Black Ice Posse - a band of * East African dancers, musicians and rheatre Excerpts from Eric Walks Again and * poets. From Gisborne comes the win­ Glamlet - See Thursday's agenda. $9, SHOOK THE * ners of their section of the Battle of or $6 with Orientation Card. * * the Bands - Tip Tap Nice Scheme, an 8 piece fun band playing originals in 6.00pm Maidment Little Theatre * mlet, the Eric V» * a mixture of rock, reggae and jazz TEN DAYS THAT SHOOK THE s being the insni * styles. Antigravity Stilt Theatre reap­ WORLD * gion that wors * pears with mime, comedy and stilt ts God. After a dancing. Bruce Robertson, a specialist Eric Walks Again, and Glamlet - See * * in playing ethnic and handmade in­ returned as a tti Thursday's agenda. $12, or $9 with id demolishers,l * struments, as well as other cultural Orientation Card. * entertainment groups will also display ind bring it bac * their talents. Going on during the day ndy Shakespea 7.00pm Cafe * nt Glamlet, tl * will be food stalls, information desks, sstern version CLASSOC TOGA PARTY * conducted tours of the Association 6 with Orienta * facilities, all winding up at sunset Toga essential. Prizes for best Roman, * * 8.00pm Gluepot Greek, or Egyptian couple. Ticket sales * 'heatre in Quad - $5 or $4 with Orientation The JEAN PAUL SARTRE EX­ PS. Another band, Ha Ha Bonk has * just been booked for the Mardi Gras. SHOOK THE t Card. * PERIENCE and THE BATS k * I 8.00pm Shadows * The ever-popular Christchurch Bats KABIR * return again for this year's Orientation ind Glamlet - sal * after an acclaimed new album and a only the full shi * irientation Card* Disbanded Clear members join up * sell-out Australian tour. The inspiring with other talent to produce a variety * Jean Paul Sartre Experience also of tight and exciting numbers. * grace us with their presence before * they move on to bigger and better * things, with albums being released in 8.00pm St James * LIMBS - NOW IS THE HOUR * both the UK and the States and plans See Thursday's agenda for details. * to test the water in Australia with a re $22.50/$19.00 or only $12.00 with * tour in August. $12 or $8 with Orien­ * tation Card. Orientation Card. * * * )ng through 8.00pm Maidment Theatre y. Starring * 5 STALKER STILT THEATRE with JAY * 5l Mike Hardingl CLARKSON * or $6 for FolkC* * Orientation C* * The Stalker Stilt Theatre present some * amazing acrobatics and dramatic * * theatre on stilts, and Jay Clarkson, * * formerly of the Expendables, teams * THE HOUR f t up with fellow Breathing Cage f k member Michael Kime and the sing­ ogramme of dajj. ing talents of Maria Chiaroni. $12 or / Limbs' highlyp|> $8 with Orientation Card. d' Douglas Writ* ie music of fc 8.00pm Gluepot veil as compoff FRANK CHICKENS and DEAD to Nina Hag* FAMOUS PEOPLE r only $12 for Oa­ rs. r Orientation catches Frank Chickens a on their first NZ tour. A Japanese a female pop duo based in London, a a N.M.E. described them as 'possibly a the best band in the Universe.' Sup­ a porting them are Dead Famous People, a an all-woman Auckland band who a a have made a name for themselves in a their recordings and live music. $12 or a $8 with Orientation Card. CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 13 (YAMAHA

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14 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 CHAPLAIN'S CHAT

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A scream is heard, a woman petrified at the of women they would never be sure if their sight of blood, Jane is cornered by a wild children were theirs, and hence if their immor­ animal but the audience sighs its relief as Tar- tality was guaranteed. The treatment of zan hurtles onto the scene. Whether Crocodile menstruation as something dirty particularly BONAPPETIT! Dundee is saving a lady journalist from a in Moslem dominated countries, has made it

\ crocodile, or they're showing the tenth movie a source of embarrassment to women. It must this year on a woman's struggle against breast be asked is the creation of life dirty?, the Auckland University is a melting-pot cancer, when we have yet to see the words answer must be no, then why is motherhood where people from many parts of New 'Prostrate cancer' used in a bad taste U.S. made to hang its head in shame over the 28 Zealand - and the world - gather to movie, or a woman is portrayed as hunted, day cycle. pursue a variety of goals. It is a rich stalked, or in a position of fear, then we are I find it sad that young women lower their and spicy mixture! We hope you will watching the popular role of women as vic­ voices and eyes when purchasing tampons find it enriching for yourself. tim. The world desires heroes, people wtio do when men feel no embarrassment in purchas­ what others wish they could, people to admire ing porn. We're the life-givers, there can be no The melting-pot can very easily and to live through. For there-to be a hero there shame in that, or the closely related bio func­ become a pressure cooker, especially must be a victim. In our society that victim is tions. A womans body is hers to control and as the pressures of community expec­ most commonly a woman. She is portrayed as feel comfortable about. tations, of competition for employ­ scared, frightened, unable to fight back, Women face a never ending avalanche of ment, of increasing costs and decreas­ unable to cope with pressure, and at the mer­ negative stereotyping portraying intrinsic parts ing resources make themselves felt. cy of her environment and inferior make-up of the feminine role as inferior. The emphasis Competition to get into classes physically, and emotionally weaker requiring in our society is on the problems of women, together with the unrelenting protection. This is not always the case in every their betrayal, their 'down-there' womens pro- pressures of internal assessment com­ medium, but if a woman is not weak she is lems, their susceptibility to attack. Their pound the problem. strident and the instances in which she is fallability is not emphasised to encourage sup­ neither and portrayed with a totally positive port for them, nor to create awareness so that All these things have had the tenden­ image are not sufficiently common. These ar­ society might change the areas in which they cy of reducing the time available for tistic stereo-types are proving overpowering face overwhelming odds. This bad press is activities not directly related to one’s negative influences on womens self images, given to belittle in most instances, to sub­ specific course of study, and as as the media has presumed a position of jugate women through fear and embarrass­ students bury their noses deeper into power and influence in our society that has ment. Women are being blamed for the faults their books, there is the danger of nar­ made this very plausible: A T.V. in every living 'of a malfunctioning society designed by men rowing one’s interests and becoming isolated from other people.

Thes pressures represent a threat to You LOOK NOT TON16WT, the fragile human psyche, the think­ ing reed as Pascal once described the CMVINElMAY I'VE GOT A human being. They increase the in­ cidence of anxiety, aggression, and of l KISS You? HAPPOCK! psychological and psychosomatic il­ lness. And these int urn intensify the r pressures to which we are already subject..... C x

Most of the pressures of the objective O o kind - financial, assessment, career - .L are not going to diminish overnight; 7 Il>- it is clear that in order to cope with them,w e need to be able to adapt to their demands and increase our resilience. The ability to relax and to have a relaxed attitude to work and life in general are basic here.

The paradox is that this relaxation re­ quires us to widen our field of vision, room, a newspaper in every letter box, and a and are being made to feel guilty for those while everything else seems to dictate radio in almost every car. Regardless of where things that men and women do not share in that we should narrow it; to become common and thus they are afraid of. ‘broad-minded’ when single- we are or how we live some form of media is The most damaging aspect of this subjugation mindedness appears to be in reaching us and sending powerful behavioural is that as in any oppressed group the members fashion.... Only by taking advantage signals. Women are emotionally stronger than men; psychological research has shown turn upon each other competing for the small of the wide range of activities that women can cope with life's stresses and scraps of positive feed-back available. Women university life offers is it possible to strains more successfully than their male must understand that regardless of their way counteract the blinkering effect of of dealing with this negative self image, i.e. career pressures, and the narrowness counterparts who are more prone to mental whether they endorse feminism or attempt to which poses such a threat to the illness. It is difficult for women to lay claim to achieve approval through means prescribed by psychological well-being of the in­ these advantages when they are commonly portrayed in direct contrast to the reality and the patriarchy that we can not look harshly dividual, as well as to the bonds bet­ this inevitably influences men's treatment of upon each other, whilst this is so men will ween people which hold society and assume greater power through greater collec­ the world together. women and their perception of themselves and their role in society. tivism. I guess we have to be tolerant, so as not to become our own worst enemies. It is also to be noted that the relaxed Perhaps the most extreme inst ance of Women who are repelled by the word and broad-sweeping mind is often bet­ negative labels being applied to the female sex, for the protection of male ego is the feminism must remember the words meaning ter equipped for the detail of one’s and not its connotations and should be aware, particular subjects. maligning of menstruation. Look around look in the mirror. If you can find a person on this that the advances made by their sisters under planet whose existence is not intrinsically con­ this banner have never been rejected by them. There are a lot of people around the Support for each other regardless of dif­ university who are keen to help you if nected to this natural biological process which you feel that taking part in the is in itself a symbol of life, then please report ferences is the first step in a more positive to the DSIR. Menstruation is a female position for women. casserole of university life is getting biological function that makes it possible to The other means of counteracting the un­ you in a stew. Don’t be afraid to ask fortunate balance of hero and victim is to put for their help. perpetuate the human race. It first created fear in men because they did not understand it and pressure on the media for greater responsibili­ Contributed by J M K on behalf of the subsequently because men realised that if ty and to support those, movies plays novels University Chaplaincy they could not control this life giving aspect etc where women are positively depicted.

CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 15 another victim of inner city satisfied, as I think I did. Nice for a ‘redevelopment’. Federal St is due for change, perhaps, but not memorable. demolition to make way for the pro­ posed Hobson Transport Centre. - M.M. In the short time of its residence, however, Artspace has proved its worth, filling the demand for a place in the city for visual and performing arts to exhibit, perform, and screen new work. During 1987, there have been nine 'NOW IS THE HOUR' major exhibitions involving new ‘...a provocative visual poem por­ BOOKS works by over fifty NZ artists. A ART traying the descent and seduction of series of successful concerts have an innocent into the underworld. A resulted from experimental music frenzied journey abundant with im­ workshops, and Artspace has also featured the work of over twenty ages of Gothic nightmare proportions and surprising visions of serene beau­ filmmakers. ty and passionate grief. The innocent The closing was marked by a is drawn through a series of con­ Demolition Exhibition - no, ‘fraid this trasting encounters including a sleazy, wasn’t a free-for-all-let’s-knock- haunting chorus line, human sacrifice down-the-walls-before-they-do show. Rather, it featured one or more often and mythological creatures...’ So is described ‘Now is the Hour’, large-scale works by the six con­ a Limbs full evening programme, tributing artists. Of particular visual choreographed by highly acclaimed interest I found the photo construc­ ‘wild child’ Douglas Wright. Said the tions of Fiona Pardington where the Listener, ‘Wright’s work shakes the extravagant frames shifted their role from displaying the work to being the consiousness of the watcher... a little shocking, like jumping into a moun­ main focus of interest. Picador Classics Series tain stream.’ The Back Stage of New For the moment Artspace have SIEGFRIED KOGLMEIER York described Wright as ‘a tour de Published by Pan Books shifted to the first floor of Quay Release date: 26 February; - REORGANIZATION Buildings, 6-8 Quay St, but as they force of poetic strength. This young man can choreograph.’ Showing at RKS Art for the last have only a 12 month lease, the search 1988 ‘Now Is The Hour’ features, as well couple of weeks has been a: will continue for a more permanent as a wide range of composers from photographic exhibition from the base in the central city. The advertising blurb I received Mozart to Nina Hagen, the music of West German artist Siegfried Artspace also manages the George says that this series is ‘the most Auckland musician Don McGlashen, Koglmeier, who has been living and Fraser Gallery in the Frank Sargeson prestigious paperback launch of the reknown for the band Blam Blam working in Dunedin since 1985. Centre at 25a Princes St, which open­ year...’. Making such a killer of a line Blam and his involvement in From The exhibition, aptly titled ed in February with ‘Double Trouble’, like that in February is pushing Scratch and his sell-out shows The Reorganization, has the theme of an installation of drawings by Ken credibility a bit; however, I am thrill­ Front Lawn. transition - in each of the three works Heyes. ed with their selection. Orientation Card holders can book we see development and change, Twelve books have been released, at Bass for only $12. ‘Now Is The sometimes through destruction. with ten to follow in April and more Hour’ will be at the St James Theatre The first of these, ‘Skull Patter’, is after that. The publishers have at 8pm on March 3, 4 and 5. selected titles which they consider are a series of photographs taken while ‘of real influence and enduring im­ passing through Australia, beginning portance’ by authors now dearly with the decaying body of a cat. The departed. following photos show arrangements On a purely informative level: the of cat skulls, changing in each image. current douzaine include new transla­ Next is ‘Transition Title’, a transi­ tions of such well-known books as tional work consisting of photos and ‘Les Fleurs du Mai’ (Beaudelaire), ‘All ideas on the theme of his rediscover­ Quiet on the Western Front’ (Remar­ ing himself in Dunedin. que), ‘The Glass Bead Game’ (Hesse), The more recent work, ‘Build Up’, ‘The Trial’ (Kafka) and ‘Selected takes up an entire room and is actual­ Poetry’ (Rilke) along with the classic ly a photographic documentation of (with/out the Picador label) ‘Grapes two years of painting. Made up of of Wrath’ (Steinbeck). On top o f that about 500 photos, each of these are they have released the (unfortunate­ of just one canvas which was painted ly) not so widelyconsumedThe Girls’ and constantly changed over the (Montherlant), ‘The Marvellous years. Some of the photos include the Adventures of Cabeza de Vaca’ artist in the process - painting, pull­ ing apart, or adding a humorous (Long), ‘Young Torless’ (Musil), touch. The viewer follows the changes ESCALIER C. ‘Hadrian VII; (Rolfe (Corvo!), ‘Moral A film by Jean-Charles Tacchella. Tales’ (Laforgue) and ‘Paris Peasant’ around the walls from the first photo to the very last. The Bridgeway (Aragon). THE SHARE CLUB French, with English subtitles. The critical level: it is precisely this Towards the end we see the canvas by Roger Hall being cut up into rectangles, then, in ‘combination; of those we have come Mercury Theatre This is a delightful comic-drama of place of the photos hang these pieces to love and absorb with those at life among the varied tenants of a of the canvas itself. With these pieces, which we have come to shrug our Deciding on which shares to spend Paris apartment block. The story cen­ we see the transition through the three shoulders and say ‘what? by whom?’ your spare cash may not be a priori­ tres on Forster, an arrogant young art colours of which the work consists - which makes this Classics Series so ty or even a possibility for the average critic, portrayed with brilliantly cruel attractive! red, black and white. Finally, the tran­ student, but for the 8 characters of sition moves to empty rows of pins cynicism by Robin Renucci. Forster’s The Beaudelaire and the Rilke are The Share Club it becomes an obses­ sardonic view of life undergoes a from which no photos or pieces of bi-hngual editions - thank goodness! sion. Not having much interest-in the transformation following the suicide canvas hang, just suggesting the next Poetry is one area in which, if finance world myself I thought I pro­ of one of his neighbours. This is sym­ transition. ' translated, we need access to the bably wouldn’t get too much out of bolised by his changed attitude An interesting work, considering original verse, not because we doubt this production. I was right. There towards the art of the great Renoir, the translator, but because every that about 500 changes would have were a few clever jokes but not had to have been made to one can­ from open disdain early in the film translator knows that aiming for enough for me to bring myself to to an emotional and appreciative vas, and an interesting exhibition to meaning and aiming for the visual review the play with any enthusiasm. study of ‘Girl with a Watering Can’ see how the artist has followed feel (the rhyme, layout, etc) are in a Being my first encounter with a Roger near the end. The contemporary ar­ through and interpreted his transi­ constant mutual battle. The original Hall comedy I can’t help wondering tist Conrad, whom Forster ‘discovers’, tional and ‘reorganizationaF themes. verse helps us to alleviate some of that if now that I’ve seen one I may have helps lead the young critic to this new seen them all. intrinsic conflict. Full marks to the awareness via his own bright, colour­ publishers for that consideration! The story is built around the week­ ful works. Forster also literally ‘sees Over the next few weeks I will look ly meetings of a neighbourhood share the light’ in the final sun-washed at the individual books in this series club whose members range from scene which contrasts strikingly with in a little more detail. It would be suf­ frustrated housewife to randy dentist, the film’s mostly dark settings. ficient to say for now that, not­ and from university lecturer to taxi Though the dramatic softening of withstanding the merits or pitfalls of driver. We witness 4 of their meetings, Forster’s character somehow seems any particular tome, the Picador each set within a different member’s too sudden, it doesn’t spoil the cap­ Classics Series is novel, broad and en­ suitably furnished home and against tivating charm of the film as a whole. compassing, well set out and visual­ a painted backdrop of trendy With its Parisian atmosphere, a love­ ly attractive, but most importantly - renovated-villa-filled suburbia. ly classical soundtrack and great ARTSPACE UPDATE As long as your expectations are no accessible to the masses (yay, characterisation, I found it amusing, higher than an evening of light com­ pro-proletarianism!) touching, and most enjoyable. Artspace, which has been resident edy with a diluted kiwi flavour you Aidan-B. Howard for a year at 101 Federal St, will be might come away feeling vaguely - M.M. 16 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 The Summer Shakespeare is 25 years festivals where a number of Shakespeare's Shakespeare comes from reading it rather old this year, and it is nearly 400 years plays are performed: a sort of theatrical Neon than seeing it. But, the actors must be able Picnic, although some will argue that the since the emergence in Elizabeth the to convey the words and their meaning to the theatrics of the musical version were more audience (much of the rehearsal time is spent First's London of playwright William than enough). It's live, it's immediate: 'All in helping the actors feel confident in what Shakespeare. This, however, is not a those bodies on stage, all those bodies in the they're saying), coupled with their actions. history lesson, and Elizabeth O'Connor audience, the air between us, crickets chirp­ Having it presented like this is much easier to discusses both in 1988. ing - it's all really, really happening.' follow than words off a page.

'Given that it is one of the plays of 'Antony and Cleopatra' is a 'visual' play. Shakespeare that I most love, the language is Within the standrad 5 Acts there are over 40 Another 'problem' is that people just don't some of the best written, it's dense, it's scenes (more than is usually seen in a speak in a poetic prose anymore. They used dramatic, the huge cast and the very fluid Shakespeare play), events move quickly from to, and in his day Shakespeare was a popular nature of the play, it seemed to me a good play Rome to Egypt and back again. Consequent­ dramatist, with a mass appeal. 'We don't have to do with an amateur cast.' Elizabeth O'Con­ ly, quick scene changes are important. The that now', says O'Connor, 'there are popular nor, director of the Summer Shakespeare in its simple set built around the BNZ ('It's wonder­ film makers and popular musicians, but not 25th year on why out of all his plays she chose ful to have a real building to act on, it gives dramatists. Back then it was a time when peo­ 'Antony and Cleopatra'. the actors such a wonderful feeling to have ple liked plays; he wrote good plays, but there solid ground under their feet') and flexible was also a public that wanted to see them.' props ('a piece of cloth changes from a sail to The decline in his mass appeal, and of theare an awning to a piece of cloth on the ground') in general, comes down to a greater choice of To mark the occasion, Theatrre Workshop, arise, partly, out

BY ELIZABETH O'CONNOR AUCKLAND UNIVERSITY OLD QUAD 8 PM TUESDAYS ~ SUNDAYS, FEBRUARY 13TH-M A RCH 5TH 1988

n

» cq FA

CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► V. Book Vouchers.

Your name goes into a draw to win book vouchers. With a total prize value of $3,500.

Tee Shirt.

So you don’t forget what year it is, a quality ‘Orientation 88’ tee shirt.

Pen and Ruler. Year Planner. Another pen and ruler because you ’ 11 never Know where you are and have enough of them. where you ’ re going with this comprehensive year planner.

Clipboard.

A useful clipboard to hold all those notes together.

You’ll come out with more than free banking when you open an ANZ student account.

As a full time student, you’ll no doubt have and an interest-free $500 overdraft. In addition to your hands full. low interest loans and a free and easy That’s why we’d like to help carry some of your Autobankcard. financial burden. And throw in a few extra freebies Not forgetting all the free items you see on top. above. So come on in and have a chat. Apart from not having to pay any bank We’ll definitely make charges, we’ll give you free automatic payments it worth your while.

Bpok voucher and gift offer closes 5 March 1988.

18 ◄ CRACCUM March 1 1988 INTERNATIONAL NATIONAL Canoeing By the time you read this the first sports extravaganza of the year will The weekend of 20/21 February be over. The 1988 Winter Olympics saw the finals of the National at Calgary suffered a few weather Canoe champs on Lake Pupuke, problems which disrupted the and one thing was very obvious Alpine Skiing and Bobsled events from the results: the N.Z. Canoeing no doubt affecting the chances of team at the 1988 Summer Olym­ some of the favourites and giving pics in Seoul is going to collect a some of the less fancied com­ bagful of medals. It may not be a petitors a better shot at a medal. repeat of the 4 golds of L.A. '84 but All those athletes that stood on it should be pretty close. The ease the victory dais fully deserved to be with which Paul Macdonald won there after all their dedication of the the K1 500m suggests he will last few years. Let's hope that the deservedly be hot favourite for the same sort of dedication which we Gold in that event and the depth of have seen already from our own talent amongst the other New N.Z. athletes brings them the same Zealanders bodes well for the other rewards in the not-too-distant events as well. future. This is particularly so in the case of our bobsled team who, in Cricket less than a year and without any Well, it's Thursday morning and financial backing from N.Z., have us cricket followers now have to risen to a world ranking of 10th (for face the reality that the 2nd test is countries, not individual crews), going to be played without good enough to earn them the in­ Richasrd Hadlee or Andrew Jones. augural Caribbean Cup, given to the Yet again a Kiwi crowd will be top team from the countries deprived of seeing 'Paddles' break without their own bobsled tracks the test wicket record. What a and won by the N.Z. I team of Lex bummer! I am sure I'm not the on­ Peterson and Peter Henry who were ly one who was looking forward to 20th overall. The N.Z. II team was sitting in the No. 6 stand with a few driver Owen Pinnel and Blair Telford (lots really), cans, yelling at Ted to who finished 31st overall in a field 'sit down' while King Richard of 41. Both N.Z. crews suffered a (Hadlee not Foster) cleaned up the hit by getting poor draws, especial­ English batting line up and closed ly the No. II team who got the worst in on 400 test wickets. Harkonen draw on 2 of the 4 runs and would Spice! (Ed's note:?). We're going to have lost about 3 seconds, but for win anyway, Right? Right! And which they would have finished Martin Crowe's gonna get another much closer to the No. I team. century, Right? Right! And Jeff Hopefully they will have had better Crowe too, Right? Right? O ye of lit­ luck in the 4-man bob event which tle faith. Bugger it I'll think I'll go should be finished by the time you and watch it on telly at the Mon, or read this, weather permitting. RAF's or somewhere. 1988 BNZ EASTER TOURNAMENT LINCOLN COLLEGE 1-4 APRIL P.O.Box 7, Lincoln College,Canterbury. Phone 252 456, 252 466 Christchurch.

Lincoln College hosts the annual BNZ Easter Tournament on April 1-4. It promises to be an action packed weekend, with keen competition and a lively social side of the tournament as well. The Easter Tournament Trophy holders Waikato will be hard pressed to retain their hold on it. The official sports are :

A thletics Sw im m ing C ricket Table Tennis Debating T ennis Rowing Volleyball Shooting(L/Bore) W aterpolo These sports count for points towards the trophy. As well, we have two invitation sports :

Windsurfing Ironperson

The aim is to have a go and participate. The social side of the tournament will feature live bands, which will play at the hops till late. Look out for further details in your student newspaper. A sports bar will also be running*»- at the tournament. So, start planning now for this major event. Contact your Sports Officer for more details. Stephen Evans Tournament Controller-1988 BNZ Easter Tournament

OK sports fiends. Here it is, a For those students who have brief rundown on the Easter Tour­ overlooked joining clubs, LET'S nament. For those of you who are GET MOTIVATED NOW!! Easter new to the scene, these tour­ tourney this year falls on 1-4 April. naments provide a great opportuni­ I'm looking forward to seeing you ty to excel in the sporting and social all, especially those of you who facets of life. have any queries concerning sports This year we want Auckland to related events. bring home some trophies so I want to encourage everyone to consider Thanks a lot coming along. It's an experience Gina & Elton not to be missed and you don't need to be a professional athlete. CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 19 O N CAM PUS "IT'S BANKING JIM, BUT NOT AS WE KNOW IT"

'Y o u l l G o A Campus Pack includes a free Cheque Account L o n g Wa y with an interest free $500 W it h A BNZ overdraft, free ATM card, am pus a c k free AutoAccess Account, Every Campus Pack C P !' low interest loans, free account opened receives a free J p j Plan your financial future automatic payments and BNZ scratch-off card. with a BNZ Campus Pack. VISA. Every card contains a BNZ is the only bank with a All this along with the prize. Worthwhile prizes like branch right on campus or if unique advantage of BNZ advice. wall planners, movie tickets, not, just around the comer. T shirts, record vouchers and ROM This Orientation Week, BNZ many many more. YOUR BANK talk to BNZ about Campus Pack. H -ON CAMPUS YOUR BANK FOR THE FUTURE

20 CRACCUM March 1 1988 I SUCCESSFUL STUDY STARTS WITH EFFICIENT READING DIAL A HOME TAKE THE A.T.I. COURSE IN AUCKLAND'S ONLY 7 DAY RENTAL INFORMATION SERVICE RAPID READING The most economical and efficient way of finding your next home. We carry flats/houses and flatmate positions in all areas and bank FOR BETTER AND FASTER PERFORMANCE book sizes. A discount of $11.00 is available to any and all who bring this ad with them. So come by and see us at - 1 O'CONNELL STREET, CITY ' or call on MONDAYS 10.00 - 12.00am Wellesley St 7 9 9 - 3 6 7 OPEN TILL 8 P.M. TUESDAYS 6.30 - 8.30pm Wellesley St

WEDNESDAYS 6.30 - 8.30pm Wellesley St

THURSDAYS 6.00 - 8.00pm Akoranga (Nth Shore)

GIVE YOURSELF THE ADVANTAGE’ NOW

A note to University Students who like to sing ..... For further information and enrolment Phone 773-570 Extn 8642 Tf the University choirs’ timetables don’t suit your own, you might consider the AUCKLAND YOUTH CHOIR (ages 16 to 24) - a mixed-voice choir of about six­ (ask for Julie) ty, singing a wide range of music under enthusiastic conductor BR1GID McLAF- FERTY. Meets every Thursday evening in Term-time, 6.30 - 8.30, in St Paul’s Chu.ch Crypt, Symonds St. (handy to University). We’re not seeking solo singers, but we aim for a high standard. Some sight-reading ability an advantage.

OPEN REHEARSALS on Thursdays 3 and 10 March. VW Auckland Technical Institute

Come along and sing with us on these two dates - without commitment!

The Auckland Youth Choir sponsored by COMMERCIAL UNION INSURANCE

The Butterworth Bookshop Test

Butterworths Bookshop sells all the law books that:- Voted Top Salons; - are set texts □ Mens and Ladi«- 4 uears running N are recommended texts □ Metro readers give a useful background □ D O W N T O W N * CITY are fun □ 790987 have good student discount EL all the above M □ □Q Butter worths Bookshop Plaza Level, National Mutual Centre, / Shortland Street, $ f lu & L

ph 399-171 ■ I ■ $10 off $8 off $10 Off $8 off Princes St 1 LADIES CUT MENS CUT PERM HENNA COMB ON SEMI- i. & BLOW WAVE & BLOW WAVE OR HIGHLIGHTS PERMANENT COLOURS

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We are here ►►►►! W' Butteutterworths CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 21 CHRISTIAN FOCUS CONTRIBUTORS SOUGHT CLUBS AND SOCIETIES Club Workshop FOR RAZOR MAGAZINE NOTICES Introductory meeting. Thursday 24th March 7-9pm in Societies Council the Council Room. Come and 'Focussing on Christ: Razor, the Also Culture! Also Com­ sort out all those details on how What does it mean to be a ics! magazine is looking for new to run a club efficiently. Topics work for its seventh issue. Women 1. Notice is hereby given of the Christian on campus?' to be covered include how to : particularly take note. (We've had 1st Societies Council Meeting Speaker: Ray Galvin. to be held on the Tuesday, - chair a meeting one strip ever from a woman! - run a dance Friday 4th March, 1pm, March 15th at 1pm in the Clubroom, Recreation Centre. Enough said.) Anyone interested - keep club accounts can contact me at 395-361 Council Room (in the Recep­ (Please note our new venue). tion area). - gain all those benefits etc that daytime or 860-182 at night - ac­ an affiliated club is entitled to. tually the most direct thing you can 2. Every Club and Society on CAPPING REVIEW campus is asked to send a Any queries please see Societies do is drop into the Govt Bookshop Rep - Dave Stewart, Treasurer - DIRECTOR and ask for Cornelius. Bring your delegate to this meeting. 3. Any member of a Club/Society Wayne McDougall, or President - stuff with you. Oh, and there's no Richard Foster. Applications are invited for the bucks in it. Just pride o' publication may attend and shall have position of Director of the etc. speaking rights but only the Association's 1988 Capping Society delegate shall have OPPORTUNITIES FOR the power to vote. Review, which is scheduled for WORSHIP the first week of May. STUDENT LIFE 4. Matters for discussion are: Applications should be made in - the election of the Societies writing to the Secretary, Pilar Introductory Student Life Meeting Council Secretary An office of Morning Prayer is held Alba, and should contain details in MLT 3, 1pm, Thursday March 3: - the election of two members Mon, Wed & Fri at St Andrew's Hall of the applicant's relevant ex­ Find out what Student Life is all to Grants Sub-Committee and Tuesdays & Thursdays in the perience, an outline of plans for about. Meet handsome, pretty, and - any general business or Maclaurin Chapel at 9am. You are the show and an indication of friendly staff workers. Meet ugly, representative from Clubs welcome to participate when you the level of remuneration (if any) gross and vulgar students. Find out and Societies on campus are able. anticipated. why fun is not a four letter word. - affiliation Applications close at 5.00pm on Enjoy Z-rated video of National - Clubs and Societies day The Sacrament of Holy Commu­ Friday, 18th March 1988, and an Conference. Discover how you can - general business nion is celebrated in the Maclaurin appointment will be made as have an impact for Christ on this - date of next meeting Chapel at 1.10pm on Thursdays in soon as possible thereafter. pagan campus. 5. Please ensure that your club term except when other special has at least one representative services are being held. Again, you SECONDHAND attending this meeting. Coffee are welcome to participate when BOOKSTALL MONDAY MOVIES and tea will be served, so you are able. bring along your lunches. Friday 4 March is celebrated round Secondhand texts and other This year the Maidment Arts Cen­ Affiliation the world as an international day o f books can be bought and sold at tre is again running its popular lun­ prayer. The service this year was the Functions Room till the end chtime movie programme. Screen­ prepared by women in Brazil. A ser­ of the first week of term. The ings are at 1.05pm each Monday Affiliation to AUSA must be renewed each year, your 1987 vice will be held in the Maclaurin last day for receiving books is during term time. Admission $2, affiliation will lapse as from 1st Chapel at 1.10pm. this Tuesday, March 1. Books will concession card $8 (includes first May 1988, if you wish to con­ be on sale till Friday March 4, film free). tinue to enjoy the benefits of be­ MEDITATION AND YOGA and payout will be on Thursday ing affiliated to this Association, 10 and Friday 11 March between March 7 - Raising Arizona 9am - 6pm only. Those bringing forms are available from AUSA Eight-week meditation and yoga books to sell come up the East reception. Please make sure your philosophy course starts March 8 affiliation forms are in to Recep­ end stairs, nearest the Studass EGYPTOLOGICAL SOCIETY at the New Zealand School of tion or Societies Rep for Friday offices, and those wishing to Meditation, 395 Dominion Rd, Mt 25th March for the following Eden. Classes day or evening, no buy books come up the Princes EGSOC lives... EGSOC is a small week's SRC Agenda. charge. Ph 604-349. St stairs. scale club designed mainly for students interested in the study of Ancient Egypt and its hieroglyphic LIBRARY TOURS 1988 language. Although we do have STUDENT LEARNING academic activities such as the Guided tours of the General Library Triannual Talk on Mummification, for new students will depart from and an exploration of the back ‘notetaking 1. Thurs 1-2.00pm, March 17 and the Library foyer at the following rooms of the Auckland Museum, times: 24. Venue: Rm 029 Old Arts we also find time for such relaxing BASIC WRITING SKILLS First Week of Term 1 2. Thurs 1-2.00pm, Mar 31 and Apr activities as video evenings or Dr Tues 1-2.00pm, March 22, 29; April Monday Feb 29 - Friday March 7. Venue: Rm 029 Old Arts Phibes and Monty Python's Life of 12 19, 26; May 3. Venue: Rm 029, 4. 3. Wed 4-5.00pm, April 13 and 20 Brian, an Egyptian orgy where on­ Old Arts. At 11.10am; 12.10pm; 2.10pm; Venue: Counselling Lounge ly bad beer can be drunk, and sun­ ESSAY WRITING 3.10pm; 7.10pm 4. Wed 1-2.00pm, Apr 27 and May dry other social events. Any sug­ Thurs 1-2.00pm, April 14, 21 and Second Week of Term 1 4. Venue: Rm CB114 (Classics Bldg) gestions of other activities would 28; May 5. Venue: Rm 029, Old Monday March 7 - Friday March GOAL SETTING AND TIME be welcome, to help make EGSOC Arts 11 a more lively club than in the recent MANAGEMENT 1. Mon 1-2.00pm, March 14 and 21. READING TEXTS At 11.10am; 12.10pm; 2.10pm past. Talk to us in the Classics 1. Wed 1-2.00pm, Mar 30; Apr 6 Third Week of Term 1 Venue: Rm CB114 (Classics Bldg) tearoom (Classics building attic) or and 13. Venue: Counselling Lounge Monday March 14 - Friday March 2. Mon 1-2.00pm, Mar 28 and Apr come along to our Annual General 2. Wed 1-2.00pm, Apr 20,27; May 18 11. Venue: Rm CB115 Meeting on Monday the ninth of 4. Venue: Counselling Lounge. At 11.10am; 2.10pm. March, Room CB 116 at one pm. POSITIVE THINKING, SELF- DISCIPLINE AND RELAXATION MOTIVATION, MEMORY AND Membership fees a dollar. CONCENTRATION Each tour takes approximately 1. Tues 1-2.00pm, Mar 15, 22 and 29. Venue: Counselling Lounge. Mon 1-2.00pm, Apr 11, 18; May 2. 25 minutes. Please Note: The notice under our 2. Tues 1-2.00pm, April 12, 19 & Venue: Rm CB114. name in the 'Transition' magazine, 29. Venue: Counselling Lounge. LANGUAGE SUPPORT FOR ESL SCIENCE LIBRARY TOURS does not accurately describe our STUDENTS club, and it was not the official note BUILDING SUCCESS IN MATHS Times: Tuesday and Friday, Thurs 1-2.00pm, First meeting April The Science Library will be holding which we wrote. Please ignore it. 1-2.00pm 14. Venue: To be advised. See guided tours commencing from the First Meeting: March 15 (third week tutors, Josto or Barbara front desk at the following times: Also Note: We are in no way, shape of term) READING EFFICIENCY First and second weeks of term: or form connected with the An­ Venue: Rm CB115 (Classics Bldg) Wednesday 1-2.00pm, March 11.10am and 2.10pm. cient Egyptian Church of the In­ INTERMEDIATE ALGEBRA 16,23,30 and April 6,13,20,27 and All staff and students welcome. finite, neither is the Classics Dept. Time: Wednesday, 1-2.00pm May 4. Venue: Rm 029 Old Arts. First Meeting: March 16 (third week SPELLING WORKSHOP of term) First Meeting: Wed, 1-2.00pm, Mar Venue: Rm CB115 (Classics 16. Venue: To be advised. See tutor, Building) Barbara Grant. 22 •* CRACCUM March 1 1988 We want you.... or your letters! (Preferably the latter). Controversy appreciated, as long as we're not likely to get gues. Maximum length 200 words, preferably double spac­ ed, either typed or tidely handwrit­ ten and get them in to us as early in the week as possible.

run by madmen. At one place I had PENPALS WANTED NAKED ROMANS E.V.P. FORGETS to wait in a queue only to hear 'We CLOTHES don't service womenfolk here - go Ravind Prasad (22) male, final years Dear Craccum, round the corner'. Well well I hope BA student in English and he didn't mean service like Lochie History/Politics. Would like to cor­ I was disturbed to notice during Dear cousin Blackie, our Angus at home. respond with young ladies in the a recent performance of Antony & Another guy must have been a same age group. Hobbies - Politics, Cleopatra recently, that the Roman Well isn't life hectic here. Mum­ bit busy when he woke up - he was literature and friendly Legionnaires were rather poorly my and Daddy said things might be wearing a sheet! It made me laugh correspondence. equipped in the spear department. different from home - and golly gee when I heard he was 'Educational As the LXXVIth Roman Legion on whiz - they are. Friday night in Vice President'. I mean - even I Address : campus may confirm, it is the Bainese is nothing on Albert Park know how to put my clothes on! Ravind Prasad policy of the Roman Imperial Army Saturday afternoon (mind you Fri­ I would love to hear from you P.0. Box 1168, to have all it's legions fully outfit­ day night in the park is quiet). Lots of luv Suva, ted with armour, uniforms, helmets, Enrolment was slow. The place is Cousin Daisy Fiji. AND spears. Of the 20-odd Legion­ naires who appear in the Old Quad, only four have spears while the Dear Sir/Madam, others are, figuratively speaking, A new group is naked (i.e. unarmed). Now this is starting up on campus I am a 21 year old female student not a good situation for any Roman th is gear. in Adelaide, Australia. I would like to to be in, especially when one is a 11 i s travel to New Zealand in the near soldier of Big Julie, and were one to future and am interested in cor­ be caught by a superior orificer in responding with students from all an active-duty situation in an un­ STUDENTS FOR THE N Z. ENVIRONMENT disciplines. I have recently com­ conquered foreign country (as pleted a Bachelor of Arts degree at Egypt was at that time), then one We w ill look at such topics as lead in the University of Adelaide, and am might expect seventy days on the petrol , packaging , chemical additives , currently studying for a Diploma of galleys in the rowing brigade or native forests and the future of nuclear Education (Early Childhood). My in­ some similar punishment. In short, power in the pacific! terests include travelling, Australian the producers of this play have and international politics, cor­ seriously erred in failing to provide Interested in joining ? Put gour name on responding with penfriends, playing their troops with adequate netball, volleyball and other sports, weaponry. the lis t on mg office door , rm 109 on the snowskiing, and playing guitar. However, all is not lost. I have a first floor of the student union. If you are interested in correspon­ solution! The recently installed Marg Atkinson ding with me, write to :- fence around Albert Park is com­ Environmental Affairs posed of 3,762 Roman spears, cun­ Helen Kilsby ningly welded together in a c/o Lincoln College cleverly-disguised armoury. This 45 Brougham Place has presumably been placed in that North Adelaide S.A. 5006 location so that should an alien in­ Australia. vasion occur and an EMP wipe out the existing telecom/electrical bas­ ed systems, the police and army Dear Ladies and Sirs, may have recourse to the fence around the said Park. May I recom­ I'm a 26 year old male German stu­ mend that several gas-torch equip­ dent. I'm studying Economics at ped centurions make a raid upon the University of Cologne. It's my this part and proceed to liberate the wish to find a pen-friend of your appropriate number of spears that University and I'll request you to they may be able to use to equip help me, finding an adequate per­ their troops. Besides making the son. I'd like to correspond in play much more plausible, this will English because I've to refresh and also have the benefit of allowing improve my English. I'm interested students who have to sprint in having a correspondence with a through the Park to catch their bus nice student (male or female) near­ be much more able to cope with a ly the same age (+ 1 -3 years) and bird's-eye line of attack, rather than who's also interested in West having to divert to a big extent Germany. around the edge of the park to where one of the inconveniently- Yours sincerely located gateways exists. Other than that minor dereliction Rolf Schafer of duty, the play is well done. I com­ Stiftsstr. 59 mend the producers, and trust they D-5300 Bonn 3 will ensure their troops are proper­ West Germany ly equipped before going into action against the troops of the Pharaoh (Life, Prosperity & Health to her!) again. CRETIN COMPLAINS Yours sincerely, Dear Craccum, Patriotic Southerner

As a liberal minded male, I could see no need for a survey of the pro­ blems faced by women students. This was conducted during enrol­ LANGE HANGI? ment, and is basically a waste of our student fees. Women have already achieved equality, and on May P.M. Lange gain the pain Campus they often have unfair Of waiting out in cold and rain privileges. Student fees should be For a bus that's out on strike used for the benefit of all students, He should have to take a hike not just to investigate the problems To a far Postbank to cash the check of a minority. For which we pay and so, by heck, Should we take David to a hangi J. Dwyer For a final festive bangi Before a farewell langi tangi?

Anonymous CRACCUM March 1 1988 ► 23 BIJRSAKY BACK- ST O P We’ll back you up

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