Deluxe Boxed Set $29.95 In addition to both of the campaign sourcebooks (Mythos of the Divine and Worldly and Sourcebook of the Sovereign Lands), the Kingdoms of Kalamar boxed set contains two gorgeous 24” x 36” full color maps depicting the lands of Tellene. These maps are printed on extra heavy stock and have been recognized as the finest fantasy maps on the market.A hex grid overlay is provided to protect these treasures.

Mythos of the Divine and Worldly This 88 page guidebook painstakingly describes the 44 deities and religions of Tellene. Volume II also includes details on Tellene’s major secret organizations, rune-sets for 11 languages, constellations, astronomical marvels and an all-inclusive eight page index. $10.95

Sourcebook of the Sovereign Lands This 100 page tome details the history of the peoples and nations of Tellene. From the depths of the mysterious Vohven Jungle to the vast savanna of the Drhokker horse-lords, this book describes every kingdom, race and topographical feature of Kalamar’s world. $11.95

The Kingdoms of Kalamar

K&C101 Tragedy in the House of Brodeln $9.95 Sample file A 1st-3rd level adventure set in Kalamar, this K&C102 Secret Temple of Adajy $9.95 adventure supplement is made expressly for A mid to high level adventure set in use with HackMaster, AD&D or any other Kalamar, this adventure supplement is fantasy RPG. This 56 page adventure made expressly for use with HackMaster, contains: ImageQuest adventure illustrator, 5 AD&D or any other fantasy RPG. Similar player aids and handouts, NPC portraits and in style to Tragedy in the House of Brodeln, backgrounds, a flowchart for a dificult this exciting 72 page adventure contains two encounter, encounter tables, a full glossary, a complete and distinct dungeon adventures complete village, a timeline of events, 8 3- in addition to the extras you expect from Dimensional dungeon maps, and 5 sample Kenzer & Company: the ImageQuest player characters with complete backgrounds. adventure illustrator, player aids and hand- outs, NPC portraits and backgrounds, encounter tables, a full glossary, a city and K&C201 GameMasters WorkShop $9.95 10 maps. volume one: Beneath the Waves

Game Master’s Workshop (GMW) is a series of source material designed for use with any role-playing system. This edition of GMW is set in the Kingdoms of Kalamar Fantasy Campaign setting in Whimdol Bay on the southern shores of the Elos Desert. Standard features of GMW include Close Encounters of a Random Kind (random encounter or event tables), Bait, Snare &Bag (brief plot lines for adventures presented in a simple format) and The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (detailed descriptions of NPC personalities, motivations and basic abilities). A multitude of new items (both normal and magic), spells, races and monsters are also included. This volume describes a detailed society of Mermen including their lives, their interactions with surface dwellers, and both the mundane and extraordinary plights they face.

© Copyright 1998 Kenzer and Company. All rights reserved. Advanced Dungeons & Dragons is a registered trademark of . Use of this trademark is NOT sanctioned by the holder. Mythos of the Divine and Worldly, Sourcebook of the Sovereign Lands, HackMaster, ImageQuest, Tragedy in the House of Brodeln, Secret Temple of Adajy, Game Master’s Workshop, The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, Bait, Snare & Bag, Close Encounters of a Random Kind and the Kingdoms of Kalamar are trademarks of Kenzer and Company. Knights of the

KENZER & TM COMPANY D T Knights of the Dinner Table #23 inner able Dice Follies! September, 1998 Created by Jolly R. Blackburn ______© Copyright 1998, Kenzer and Company, All Rights Reserved. Knights of the Dinner Table™ magazine is published monthly by Kenzer and Company. “Dice“Dice Follies!”Follies!” Subscriptions: A one year sub- scription (12 issues) is only $32.00 (US $36.00 in Canada and US The KODT DEVELOPMENT TEAM is $50.00 Overseas). To subscribe, send a check or Jolly R. Blackburn, Brian Jelke, money order (made payable to Kenzer and Company) to: ______Steve Johansson and Kenzer & Company Cover Art by George Vrbanic KODT Subscriptions, 2094 Camino a los Cerros Menlo Park, CA 94025 ______Table of Contents or fax a valid Visa, MasterCard, or ™ Discover card number, your signa- CRIES FROM THE ATTIC ture, card type and expiration date editorial of a madman ...... 2 to us at (650) 233-8270. TABLE TALK™ Back Issues: Back issues and reader mail ...... 4 related merchandising are also available. See page six of this issue THE SCAPEGOAT or our website for details. weird pete goes underground after being hounded by the media ...... 7 Legal Notice: Knights of the Sample file Dinner Table, Dice Follies!, Game HELP WANTED!! Vine, KODT, HackMaster, the since when did BOB become a WORKAHOLIC? ...... 9 Kenzer and Co. Logo, and all prominent characters and likenesses THE SUBSTITUTE thereof are trademarks of Kenzer bob fills in weird pete’s empty chair ...... 12 and Co. Gamin’Dick is a trademark A MAN OUT STANDING IN HIS FIELD of Berkeley Game Distributors and the black hands RAZ bob ...... 14 is used with their permission. Mailing Address: Kenzer and IT TAKES A THIEF! Company, 2094 Camino a los there’s no place like home for good ‘ol knuckles ...... 18 Cerros, Menlo Park, CA 94025. Phone/fax: (650) 233-8270. THE UNEXPECTED ENCOUNTER Internet: [email protected] SLACKMOZER??!! ...... 24 (editorial inquiries only) or HEARD IT ON THE GAMEVINE™ [email protected] (all other news, rumors and industry buzz plucked from the vine ...... 26 inquiries). World Wide Web: http://members.aol.com/relkin/ken KODT IDEA SEARCH zerco.html fill in the blanks and send us your own story ideas for kodt ...... 28 Submissions: We accept submis- ™ sions for strip ideas, jokes, car- MOVIES FROM A GAMER’S POINT OF VIEW toons, etc. We are interested in run- movies subjected to the toughest critic of them all - a gamer! ...... 29 ning anything that other gamers BRIAN’S SMALL PRESS PICKS™ and fans would enjoy. Send a brian’s picks of the month for games worth pulling off the shelf ...... 30 S.A.S.E. for writer’s guidelines to the address listed above or E-mail WEIRD PETE’S BULLETIN BOARD™ [email protected]. pete’s board is jammed with lot’s of interesting things to read...... 31 Advertising: A copy of our latest ™ ad rates can be obtained by writing PARTING SHOTS the KenzerCo address above or one last jab at yer funny bone on the way out the door ...... 32 calling (650) 233-8270. You may also E-mail [email protected] Editorial of a Madman “Looks like Joe Gamer still has a soft spot for newsprint and Zip-loc bags!” Troy Spencer, USC gamer

he other day I had an opportunity to hang with a group of good old fashioned beer-and-pretzel games. This isn’t to say gamers in Columbia, South Carolina who had turned out that there aren’t some great games coming out of the other Tto get their copies of KODT autographed and to [hopeful- design shops out there. I’m also a big fan of ArchAngel’s Groo ly] prod me into playing a few games. card game, WotC’s Twitch and Guillotine card games, Looney Recently, I’ve rediscovered my love of board games (and Lab’s Aquarius, Out of the Box’s Bosworth, Atlas Games’ traditional card games) so I was looking forward to getting a Spammers and Lunch Money and many, many others. chance to play a few. In fact, I had even brought a huge stack I’m just using Cheapass to illustrate a point. You see, of board and card games with me which I had picked up at someone at Cheapass figured out what so many game compa- some of the summer conventions. When I mentioned that I nies have forgotten in recent years – the Game is the thing! If had this horde-of-games sitting in the back of my van, I was you’ve got a fun, solid game the packaging is..uh...well, it’s quickly shoved out the front door to retrieve them. It was only just that - packaging. Sure, there are marketing considerations. after I had hauled the games in and set them on the table that I Good packaging can move a product, we all understand that. realized just how large my horde really was. “The Jol- But I’m of the opinion that having a ‘good game’ can move a Meister”, as one drooling gamer put it, ‘has made out!!” product even faster! There were some ooooo’s and aaaaah’s from the group My game shelf is filled with pretty games which promised since many of the games had not showed up in the local game to be entertaining. Sadly, many of those same games just sit shops yet. Then, without warning, there was a mad scramble there and gather dust. as everyone started popping open boxes, examining counters So...when I saw the list of winners for the Origins Awards, and game components, flipping through rule sheets and com- I said a silent, “YESSSSS!” when I learned that both Doctor menting on the quality of the games and the beautiful graph- Lucky and Give Me the Brain had taken the awards for Best ics. It was literally Christmas in July and I was enjoying my Abstract Boardgame and Best Traditional Boardgame hero-for-a-day status as Gamer Santa. respectfully. Now I have to point out that there were some very impres- As one of the Carolinian Gamers commented as we were sive games on that table, at least one of them [a European playing Doctor Lucky, “Looks like Joe Gamer still has a soft import] was a sixty dollar game! Many of the others were in spot for newsprint and Zip-loc bags! I wish the big guys the thirty dollar range. One game boasted of having over one would take a lesson!” hundred components crammed in its box! Understandably, I The words made me smile as I nodded in agreement. No, was amazed [I think my jaw even dropped] when everyone he wasn’t suggesting that the large game companies start decided they wanted to play CheapAss Games’ Give Me the Xeroxing their product and stuffing them into Zip-loc bags. Brain [Chosen as a Brian’s Pick in KODT #11] and Kill Just that they keep in mind the simple rule - the game is the Doctor Lucky. thing! Everything else is packaging. If you’ve ever seen these games, you may understand my I was told that when James Ernest of Cheapass Games astonishment. The company is called Cheapass Games for a accepted his he said, “When I started in this reason. All of their games are ‘cheaply’ made. The cards are business the retailers told me they wanted games that would Xeroxed on what looks to be Astrobrite card stock. The games sell themselves! I decided to make some!” come packaged in an envelope and sell Samplefor five bucks! Both fileUnderdog couldn’t have said it any better. games require dice and/or playing tokens but you are informed Well, I see I’ve rambled enough for this issue. Enjoy this you have to provide your own. We’re talking cheap as in very month’s offering of KODT. As always, please let us know low production quality. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not knock- how we’re doing. ing either of these games or, for that matter, Cheapass Games. I happen to love them and have played both many times. Good Gaming, Give Me the Brains and Kill Doctor Lucky were BIG HITS in ‘97. That’s pretty amazing when you stop to realize that they weren’t heavily advertised. Word of mouth put these Jolly R. Blackburn games on the map. I’ve seen gamers pass by the glossy big dol- July 16, 1998 lar games time and time again for a chance to play one of these uh....b.a., i’ve changed my mind. doesn’t look like i’ll be doing any oh for crying out loud!! the HOODY HOO¡¡ shopping at the general store FORTY STICKS of DYNAMITE after all. i’m taking a FAST you hid in the SHERRIF’’S saddle- i turn the GATLING GUN i’m TAKIN’ OUT TRAIN out of the territory!! bags detonates when DAVE shoots on the town square and that RAT BASTARD the bags with his WINCHESTER MOW DOWN the POSSE!! of a DEPUTY next!! TRAIN?? good idea!! i’ll RIFLE and blows him to bits!! check out the baggage car for LOOT!! CRIES FROM THE ATTIC CRIES FROM THE ATTIC Sample file TTABLEABLE TALK:TALK: READERREADER MAIL MAIL suggestions forthingsthey’dliketosee. like) aboutKODT. We alsoloveitwhenourreaders giveus detailed letterssuchasyourstellinguswhatyoulike(anddon’t lovereceiving “atta-boy” lettersfrom ourfans,weREALLY (Tales from thevault, Company was tosubscibeit.Ihavebuyallicouldgetat that ward toreaditindragonmag.Butwasrecentlythatinotice see ifitwasthereagain.Itwas.Sincethattime,ihavelookfor- really enjoythestripsoilookitinnextmonthmagazineto KODT, Dear strip. (that’s why IamtheGM)andmusttranslatethemKODT advantage. Noneofmyplayersunderstandawordenglish times whenitcometolanguage,isaobstaclebutalsobig T for atop10ofallthebeststrip.Itwoulbbegreat! top 10is. And maybeifyouliketheidea,makeaspecialplace to muchthatIlike) issue of fB momtellinghimnottotrashthedinnertable. of BA story group, BobwhenhewasplayingwithNitro(flaskback), A Hackmaster, BrianasaDM, MAYBE anothergirljoiningthe grandfatherplay playing together, thetimeswhenBA more…) Enterprise publicity, BitterStevil Hand, Weird PeteasGMguest,MovieReview, Hard8 ableTalk. You seeiusuallywriteinfrenchso….Butsome- The firsttimethatihaveseeyou,itwasinDragon#226.I I thinkthatitwouldbeagoodideatoseewhatotherreader 15- The sting(#19) 14- The afteractionreview(#18) 13- The turnabout(#18) 12- Shipoffool(#16) 1 10- Priceofpassage(#12) 9- The temp(#10) 8- Nitro’s revenge(#17) 7- Brian’s Challenge (#7) 6- LairoftheGazebo(#1alsoaclassic!) 5- Cowsofwar(#2aclassic!) 4- Lordofdarkness(#2) 3- Carryabigstick(#17) 2- An overbearing situation(#12) 1- Agent ofEvil(#5) The thingsthatilikethemost; Now aftertwomonthsofreadinghereiswhatIhavetosay TO Things awouldliketosee; Gary JacksonFiles,SpaceHack,Longstrips(3pageand The thingsthatiliketheleast; Thanks alotandcontinueyourgoodwork! Thanks foragreat letter, Erik!Whilewelovegettingallthe I hopethatwywritingisgoodenoughtogetprintinthe KODT 1- Wherever yougo–thereare(#6) P KODT 0 ETSTRIPS 10, BEST was amonthlycomicbook. The firstreaction ihave ). u ReadersTalkBack! Our (I havemadeitatop15,thereis h OTand The BlackHand the KODT K K (But theyarefunnytoo!) Bundle ofTrouble E-mail :[email protected] Sample file 29AguèeAP43 1229 AngoulèmeAPP O O Cattlepunk!, The Black Cattlepunk!, The O O’ EDAFR ⁄APAT EDUS SEND FORM›⁄-ALPHATO A NEED DON’T YOU D D T T ORCMET NKD,Y KNOW?? KODT,YA ON COMMENTS YOUR

L L Chicoutimi PQ Erik Bouchard E E or youcansendyoursnailmail to T T Kenzer & G7H 5A2 T T J J and 13 don't the take aturngamemastering?Ibetshe'dbegood. Also, why testosterone washedshoresofgaming. know whatit'sliketobethelonevoiceofreasonon to seemoreofSaratakingamainroleinthegroup.Ireally As afemalegamerandgamemaster, ImustsayI'msorrynot only RPGrelateditemIactuallycollectonaregularbasis. KODT, Dear up thegoodworkandkeepmakingmelaugh! mygaminggroupsinthepastweresimilar. Keep I KNOW that gamerscanrelatetoB.A.,Bob,Dave,Sara,andBrian. makes itsogood(besidestheoutrageoushumor)isfact I haveeverreadinregardstoRPGs.thinkthethingthat ordered thecollectionofissues1-3. comic, missingonlyissues1,2,and4. Since then,I'vebeenluckyenoughtokeepcurrentwiththe ing issue#3fromtheback-issuebinwhereitdidn'tbelong. local comic/gameshop,Isnatcheditupeagerly, alsorescu- #5ata ture Iwouldreadeachmonth. When IsawKoDT work. The about theKnightsaspeople. Again, keepuptheGREAT LOTS whenthingsaregoingpoorly. take practicallynodamagewhenthingsaregoingwell,and chairs sohecouldn'tescapeher. And girlfriend'scharacters table. The otherguyswouldgetunderneathandholdinthe to pisshisgirlfriendoff andshewouldchasehimaroundthe combinations andthingsgetinterestingreallyfast. been inseveralgroupswithboyfriend/girlfriendGM/player gotagirlfriendandwantedtobringherplay. I've if BA kind asBA. T. and Dave'salleythepowergaming wouldsuitBriantoa City Dragon. KODT, Dear them inviaE-mailorsnailmail. ier. Ifyouwanttovoteforyourfavoritestrip(s),maysend #22.Thisshouldhelpmakethingseas- comic bookinKODT Fortuantely wejustrananupdatedchecklist/indexforthe top tenfavoritestories,we’llpublishthelistinafuture issue. look forwardtoeachmonth'snewissue. E you canwritetousviae-mail at E

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I'm sureshegetsoutshoutedalot,butwhydoesn't I mustsaymajorkudosfortheexcellentbook.It's I alsopickedup I thinkmanyofusreadersareinterestedinlearningmore The onegroupIplayedwithincollegesaidtheGMused Oh, Ihadastoryidea,too.thinkitwouldbeinteresting I firstbecameawareof AT Although theymightfindthatallGM'saren'tquiteas l l ? The MontyHaulstyleofplaywouldberightupBob B B op Ten List,eh?Ilikeit.Ifenoughreaders vote fortheir l l O O y y rmta a owr,KD becamethefirstfea- From thatdayforward,KoDT KODT X X R R ngt fteDne Table Knights oftheDinner 1 , 0 , B B 0 3 @ @ Monroe Pike,Marion, IN participate inanythinglikethe T a a ales From the Vault o o l l . . c c KODT o o m m KoDT ! ! ! ! when itdebutedin

r OLandI are aHOWL is thebestcomic , andhavesince [email protected] Baltimore, MD via E-mail Joe Huber 4 6 Living 9 J.S.B. 5 Jolly 3 WE FEEL YOUR PAIN, DUDE!

“It was bad enough you were the LAST GUY* to discover Knights of the Dinner Table, but what a bummer – the early issues had already been snagged up and you missed them.”

LOOK FOR THESE KODT COMPILATIONS AT YOUR LOCAL GAMESTORE!! CAN’T FIND THEM?? NO PROBLEM DUDE, YOU CAN ORDER THEM DIRECT!!

Sample file

IT’S ALL HERE!!! CRAMMED BETWEEN for you JOHNNY-COME-LATELY’S TWO COVERS AND BURSTING AT THE SEAMS. who caught on to KODT AFTER ISSUES ONE THRU ALL THE KODT STRIPS THAT HAVE APPEARED IN: THREE SOLD OUT, there’s GOOD NEWS!! DRAGON, SHADIS, THE FAMILIAR, THE GAMER’S “BUNDLE OF TROUBLE vol one” CONNECTION, AND ELSEWHERE!! brings the FIRST THREE ISSUES together. INCLUDES ORIGINAL KODT STRIPS NEVER BEFORE and just to be nice, we threw in an NEVER PULISHED!!!! EXPANDED BIOS OF YOUR FAVORITE BEFORE SEEN story and a few other goodies. KODT CHARACTERS KODT TRIVIA AND HISTORICAL NOTES IS THAT KEWL OR WHAT?? 64 PAGES AND ALL FOR JUST $9.95!! 96 PAGES AND JUST $9.95!!

* Note in HackMaster 5th Edition being the ‘last guy’ results in a -5 modifier to your Honor