Vol. 31, BNo. 1 NDINGSSpring 2011 A Publication of New Ways Ministry Md.'s top leaders cross Catholic hierarchy on marriage By John Wagner starting Friday in the House of Dele- centage of Catholics than Maryland, The Washington Post gates, traditionally the more liberal which has 27 percent, according to a February 25, 2011 chamber on social policy. Supporters 2008 national survey. A similar percent- there say they remain a couple of votes age of Maryland legislators are Catho- Maryland Gov. Martin O'Malley shy of a majority but were optimistic lics. regularly attends a weekday Mass and that they would pick up the backing. During the debate Thursday, Sen. has sent his four children to Catholic O'Malley (D) has pledged to sign Robert J. Garagiola (D-Montgomery) schools. the bill if it reaches his desk. Busch has said the bill would provide gay couples House Speaker Michael E. Busch said he will vote for it in the House. And the same rights he and his wife have (D-Anne Arundel) used to teach and although Miller voted against the bill in enjoyed since their marriage in a Catho- coach at his old Catholic high school in the Senate on Thursday, he had moved lic church 14 years ago. Annapolis. to head off a filibuster attempt by oppo- "It's an historic day for equal justice Senate President Thomas V. Mike nents so that it could move forward. under the law," he said. Miller Jr. (D-Calvert) grew up serving as Maryland, which emerged as a bea- Several of his colleagues countered an altar boy in the idyllic wood-frame con for Catholics during its Colonial that marriage should be reserved for cou- his family helped build days, would join five other states and the Governor Martin O’Malley ples who can fit their definition of in Clinton. District in allowing same-sex couples to "procreation" and urged the Senate not to But the presence of three Catholics marry. chooses to fulfill, and rightfully so." broaden the bounds of traditional mar- at the helm in Annapolis hasn't stopped a In a recent interview, O'Malley said Mary Ellen Russell, executive direc- riage. same-sex marriage bill from wending its his Catholic beliefs serve as the under- tor of the Maryland Catholic Conference, Sen. Edward R. Reilly (R-Anne way through the legislature, triggering pinning for much of what he does in a leading opponent of same-sex mar- Arundel) read from a bulletin distributed deep disappointment among church public life. riage, said she has been distressed by the in churches by the Maryland Catholic leaders as it suggests a waning of Catho- But, he said, "the vocation I've cho- debate and the governor's decision. Conference recently that referred to "the lic influence in this heavily Catholic sen for these last several years has been "It's always troubling when someone unique union of one man and one state. a vocation that requires one to be of ser- in such a public position openly dis- woman." The legislation won final passage vice to others in an arena of compro- agrees with the church," she said, calling Beyond the power and influence of Thursday night in the Senate on a 25 to mise. It is a different vocation than the defeat of the legislation "a critically im- the Catholic Church in Maryland, there 21 vote, setting the stage for debate vocation that a bishop or a cardinal portant issue for the church." is another potent religious force in the A few hundred Catholic priests and state opposed to same-sex marriage: Af- laity lobbied lawmakers Monday night rican American churches. on same-sex marriage and other issues as Some of the most vocal opponents part of an annual event organized by the in Thursday's Senate debate were raised Maryland Catholic Conference. in Maryland's black churches. Maryland arguably wouldn't be the "Here's my question: Where does it most Catholic state to allow gay nuptials. stop?" asked Sen. C. Anthony Muse (D- , Connecticut and Prince George's), who is senior pastor of New Hampshire all have a higher per- (Continued on page 10) Book Makes Positive Catholic Case for Marriage Equality MOUNT RAINIER, Maryland— a 2009 poll indicates that the strong sup- Catholics‘ strong support for marriage port for same-gender marriage among equality for and gay couples is Maryland‘s Catholic population mirrors the thesis of a new book which examines national statistics for Catholics as well. this controversial topic from theological (A plurality of 49% of Maryland Catho- and political perspectives. lics favor legislative action that would Delegate Heather Mizeur explains a point to a participant at New Ways Minis- Marriage Equality: A Positive allow gay and lesbian couples to marry.) try’s conference in Baltimore. Catholic Approach by Francis DeBer- In addition to statistical information, nardo is published by New Ways Minis- the book makes the case, based on theo- try, a national Catholic organization logical evidence and church documents, which works for justice and equality for that the views of lay people are authenti- New Ways Ministry discusses lesbian and gay people. DeBernardo cally Catholic positions. It describes serves as New Ways Ministry‘s Execu- some of the ways that Catholic attitudes gay marriage during conference tive Director. about sexuality have been changing over Written in the past By Frederick N. Rasmussen State." question and s e v e r a l The Baltimore Sun Mizeur, a Roman Catholic lesbian answer format, d e c a d e s , February 20, 2011 who married her spouse, Deborah, five the book dis- with an years ago in California, said, "We will pels the myth e mer gi ng Several speakers voiced support for counter our opponents' extremism with that Catholic consensus marriage equality for Roman Catholic love, and that's why we're going to win." lay people that same- gay and lesbian couples during New The Maryland Catholic Conference, follow the g e n d e r Ways Ministry's all-day conference in based in Annapolis, is against the legisla- bishops‘ pub- r e l a t i o n - Pikesville on Saturday — a view not tion. lic opposition ships are shared by the Vatican. "We're opposed to Senate Bill 116," to sa me - holy and But the 70 attendees were buoyed by said Kathy Dempsey, the organization's gender mar- should be the hope that the amended version of the communications director, in an inter- riage. Quite legalized. Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage view. "We favor marriage between one the opposite is The main Protection Act, approved by a Senate man and one woman." true, with text of the committee Thursday and headed to the The Catholic Church's official stance Catholic peo- book is full Senate for debate, would soon make is that sexual activity between people of ple leading all inter- Maryland the sixth state to recognize the same gender is not permitted and it Christian de- spersed same-sex marriages. therefore opposes same-sex marriage. nominations in their support for lesbian/ with statements from Catholics, explain- New Ways Ministry, a Maryland- During the conference at the Pikesville gay rights. ing why they have taken a positive stand based national Roman Catholic organiza- Hilton, Mizeur related the anxiety and The book examines the particular towards marriage equality. Some promi- tion, proclaims that it works for justice pain she felt when she was in college and case in Maryland, where marriage equal- nent names include: Kathleen Kennedy and equality for lesbian and gay people. was fearful of telling a priest who was ity legislation is currently being consid- Townsend, former lieutenant governor of Keynote speaker Del. Heather Mizeur, a both a religious counselor and a close- ered by state lawmakers. With a popula- Maryland, and Sister Jeannine Gramick, Montgomery County Democrat, said, friend that she was a lesbian. tion that is 23% Catholic (the largest a pioneer in pastoral ministry to lesbian "Marylanders are fair-minded people, "I knew he'd go into a meltdown, denomination in the state), Maryland is a and gay Catholics. Lesbian/gay couples and they will stand up with us, and truly and when I told him, he withdrew from good barometer for the Catholic elector- and single people, and their parents, also make Maryland the Maryland Free (Continued on page 10) ate nationally. As the author points out, are represented.  Page 2 BONDINGS Vol. 31, No. 1

B NDINGS Spring 2011 Vol. 31, No. 1 STATEMENT ON LGBT TEEN AND YOUNG ADULT SUICIDES Francis DeBernardo, Editor

Board of Directors Staff of the 8th Day Center for Justice Mary Byers 8thdaycenter.org Frank O‘Donnell, SM January 2011 Rev. Paul Thomas The 8th Day Center for Justice mourns the number of Gay, Lesbian, Transgendered, and Bisexual teen and Board of Advisors young adult suicides that have been occurring over the past months. These suicides have been the result of Cornelius Hubbuch, CFX bullying from their peers in school and a society that prioritizes heterosexuality. We believe the teachings of Anna Koop, SL the Church and the behavior of some members of the Church hierarchy have added to this atmosphere of bul- Elizabeth Linehan, RSM lying and intimidation. Patricia McDermott, RSM Rev. Joe Muth Here are a few examples: Matthew Myers 1) The Catechism of the Catholic Church states, ―Homosexuality refers to relations between men or be-

tween women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same Staff sex... Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity, tradition Francis DeBernardo, Executive Director has always declared that ‗homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered.‘ They are contrary to the natural law. Kelly Stewart, Staff Associate They close the sexual act to the gift of life…Under no circumstances can they be approved‖ (#2357).

Co-Founders 2) The bishops of Minnesota mailed nearly 400,000 DVDs to Catholics throughout the state in order to Sr. Jeannine Gramick prevent the redefinition of civil marriage to include same-sex partnerships. In this DVD, emphasis was Rev. Robert Nugent placed on the nature of marriage as a life-long and potentially procreative union between a man and woman. One of the bishops stated that laws which allow for same-sex unions potentially weaken society‘s Bondings is a seasonal publication de- already damaged foundation. signed to keep our subscribers informed of is- 3) Washington, DC now legally recognizes same-sex marriage. Because of this, the Archdiocese of Wash- sues ington decided to discontinue its foster care program and no longer offer benefits to the spouses of any new that pertain to lesbian and gay people employees, thus avoiding benefits for same-sex couples.

and the Catholic Church. 4) The Archdiocese of Denver, Colorado, decided not to re-enroll two children in one of its elementary schools. The reason why this decision was made was because the parents of these two children are lesbian. Founded in 1977, New Ways Ministry is an educational and bridge-building Despite claims to the contrary, these examples of discrimination clearly show that people of differing sex- ministry of reconciliation between the ual orientations are not welcome in the Church. Moreover, such discrimination contributes to an atmosphere Catholic gay and lesbian community in society which promotes bigotry and violence toward the LGBT community. and the institutional structures in the Roman Catholic Church. One of 8th Day Center‘s primary goals is ―to promote justice, equality and human dignity among all peo- ple regardless of race, ethnicity, religion, abilities, gender, sexual orientation, or socio-economic class.‖ New Ways Ministry seeks to eradicate Rather than rejecting or criticizing our youth because of their sexual orientation, we need to embrace and af- prevalent myths and stereotypes firm them for who they are. In effect, we need to take note of a lesser-known teaching in the Catechism of about homosexuality and supports civil the Catholic Church (#2358), which states: [People with a homosexual orientation] ―must be accepted with rights for lesbian and gay persons in society. respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God‘s will in their lives.‖ 

New Ways Ministry The 8th Day Center for Justice is a multi-issue, social justice center supported and staffed by 30 congre- 4012 29th Street gations of nuns, priests and brothers which promotes analysis and action. Mount Rainier, Maryland 20712

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Email______Dignity/Washington Honors City Council Members Please make check payable to ―New Ways Ministry.‖ Outside the US, please use only Dignity/Washington presented their Veronica & Gerald Colfer awrd to D.C. City Council members checks drawn on a US bank in US dollars or David Catania (left) and Phil Mendelson in recognition of their roles in securing passage of the city’s go to www.newwaysministry.org. same-sex marriage law. Catania wrote and introduced the marriage measure and Mendelson, as Mail to: chair of the committee with jurisdiction over the bill, managed its progress through the Council’s legis- New Ways Ministry lative process. Catania said he was pleased that polling data showed that D.C.-area Roman Catholics 4012 29th Street supported marriage equality in greater percentages than members of all other Christian denomina- Mount Rainier, MD 20712 tions, despite the strong opposition to same-sex marriage by the Catholic hierarchy.  ( Washblade.com, February 10, 2011) Spring 2011 BONDINGS Page 3 Majority of US Catholics back gay/lesbian rights in survey Landmark Poll shows laity differ from the hierarchy on marriage and other issues

Blogs.reuters.com percent of Catholics did not believe sex- almost in spite of – what the bishops and Dillon said the poll is unlikely to March 22, 2011 ual relations between two adults of the official church teachings say,‖ Dillon sway the church hierarchy. same gender constituted a sin, compared said. ―I don‘t think we should expect the In spite of, or perhaps because of, to 46 percent of the general population. Catholics tend not to like or even Catholic bishops to stand back‖ on social Roman Catholic church teachings con- Sixty percent of Catholics favored may resent having politics in church, issues, she said. ―They‘re not going to be demning homosexuality, many lay adoption rights for same-sex couples, 49 Dillon said. The survey found about one- distracted by any sort of polls. For the Catholics in the United States are more percent think gays should be allowed to quarter of church-going Catholics re- next few years, there will be a lot of ac- accepting toward same-sex relationships be ordained as clergy, and 73 percent ported hearing about homosexuality in tivism … to keep at bay the movement of than the general public, a new survey believe they should have legal protec- church – a much lower proportion than in laws in favor of same-sex marriage.‖  found. tions in the workplace – all higher per- Protestant churches. Two-thirds of the ―The big finding here is that Ameri- centages than found in the general popu- messages about homosexuality in church (See page 12 for a related story.) can Catholics are at least 5 points more lation, PRRI said. were negative. supportive than the general population There was a powerful generation gap across a range of gay and lesbian issues,‖ found in the survey, with Catholics under said Robert Jones, chief executive of the 35 much more liberal than those 65 and Public Religion Research Institute, which older. The influx of Hispanic Catholics conducted telephone surveys of 3,000 into the U.S. church in recent years did Americans. not skew the results, as the young new- The survey‘s conclusions go against comers were divided between liberal and the popular conception that Roman conservative views of homosexuality. Catholics – the largest U.S. religious American Catholics also tended to denomination at some one in four Ameri- be more liberal than evangelical and cans – are conservative on social issues, mainline Protestants, the researchers said Stephen Schneck of The Catholic said. University of America, who was asked to The conclusions fit with a strong comment on the survey by the research- pattern of liberalism among Catholics ers. that stands in opposition to the church ―Catholics appear to like civil unions hierarchy, said Michele Dillon, a sociolo- as an alternative to same-sex marriage,‖ gist at the University of New Hampshire Schneck said, suggesting that while asked by researchers to comment. There Catholics accept the rights of same-sex has been a gulf on social issues between couples to be together there may be resis- church teachings and the American laity tance to couples joined in what many see since the mid-1970s on subjects such as as a sacred rite. abortion, divorce without an annulment, Overall, the survey found 53 percent premarital sex and artificial contracep- of Catholics supported the idea of same- tion. sex marriage, while the general public is ―Catholics make up their own minds On April 28, 2011, members of Equally Blessed visited Congressional offices to evenly divided on the issue. Fifty-six about these moral issues irrespective – or deliver copies of the Public Religion Research report which showed that Catho- lic attitudes on Gay and Lesbian issues are highly positive. Left to right: Mark Clark, Francis DeBernardo, Jeannine Gramick, Bob Miailovich, Kelly Stewart, For Catholics, Open Attitudes on Jerry O'Leary, Tom McMahon, Larry Ranly, Claire Pluecker. Gay/Lesbian Issues Equally Blessed celebrates By Austin Considine Catholic issues since 1977, said he had The New York Times seen Catholics open up in recent years. Catholic majority in poll April 22, 2011 His group maintains a list of ―gay- friendly parishes and faith communities‖ The Windy City Times is alienating the faithful," said Mary As the tranquil tones of church bells around the country, which has grown to Chicago Ellen Lopata, co-founder of Fortunate and choirs usher in another Easter Sun- more than 200 from about 20 since 1997. March 19, 2011 Families, another member of the Equally day, you may hear stirrings of contro- Church traditions in social-justice Blessed coalition. "We continue to hope versy beneath those sounds — set to the advocacy play a strong role, he said. Earlier this week, two Catholic bish- that they will realize they have some- pounding of a Lady Gaga tune. ―These people aren‘t picking and choos- ops dismissed a booklet on marriage thing to learn from the lived experience It‘s no accident that Lady Gaga de- ing their Catholicism; their Catholicism equality by a member of the Equally of gay, lesbian, bisexual and cided to release the video for her pro- has motivated them.‖ Blessed coalition, saying that its author Christians, their families and their vocative single, ―Judas,‖ this Easter. Official church policy is tough on was not authorized to "speak on behalf of friends, and come to understand that one From wearing see-through nun habits to gay issues: homosexual acts are deemed the Catholic Church." can be true to one's God-given identity, suggestively swallowing a rosary, the sinful (though being homosexual is not); Today, faithful U.S. Catholics spoke even as one is true to the teachings of pop star, who was raised a Catholic, has same-sex marriage is forbidden. Embrac- for themselves, supporting the legaliza- Christ." consistently prodded her faith‘s strict ing diversity while toeing the Vatican tion of same-gender marriage by a 60-38 Forty percent of Catholics in the sexual conventions. line requires a delicate balance. margin in a new poll commissioned by survey said they "strongly supported" the But if Lady Gaga has managed to Some seek nontraditional ministry. ABC News and The Washington Post. legalization of same-gender marriage, offend some Catholics, her progressive- Dignity New York, a chapter of Dignity The survey, conducted last week by while 27 percent said they strongly op- ness, specifically her support for gay USA, an independent gay ministry Langer Research Associates, found that posed it. equality, reflects a genuine cultural mo- group, has liturgical services especially for the first time, a majority of Ameri- "I am especially proud of my Church ment. A recent study indicates that to- for gay Catholics, given mostly by cans ( 53 percent ) now support marriage today," said Nicole Sotelo, communica- day‘s Catholics are the most progressive nonactive priests, at St. John‘s in the equality, and that this change in public tions director for Call To Action, another Christians in the country regarding gay Village, an Episcopal church. opinion has happened with remarkable member of the Equally Blessed coalition. equality — and more open than Ameri- Yet Catholic churches from Texas to rapidity. Fewer than one third of respon- "Catholics who take the social justice cans in general. Wisconsin find ways to be welcoming. dents favored same-gender marriage teachings of the church seriously know Last month, the Public Religion Re- St. Francis Xavier in Chelsea, the Ora- when the same survey was conducted in that the issue of same-gender civil mar- search Institute, a nonprofit group, re- tory Church of St. Boniface in Brooklyn 2004. riage is simply one of honoring the dig- ported that 74 percent of American and many others are known for programs "The poll makes clear what we have nity of all of God's children, and treating Catholics surveyed supported the rights offering spiritual and intellectual fulfill- long known," said Francis DeBernardo, them fairly as we treat all people. of same-sex couples to marry or form ment for gay Catholics in a context once executive director of New Ways Minis- The survey, which included data on civil unions (43 percent and 31 percent, perceived as hostile. try, a member of the Equally Blessed various bellwether demographic groups, respectively). The telephone survey The Rev. Gilbert Martinez, pastor at coalition. "Catholics driven by a desire revealed that support for marriage equal- asked more than 3,000 adults to choose St. Paul the Apostle, a gay-friendly par- for justice are at the forefront of efforts ity among white Catholics stood at 64 among three options: whether gay cou- ish near Lincoln Center, said the study to make our country's marriage laws percent, an increase of a whopping 23 ples should be allowed to marry, should did not surprise him: Catholics have al- more equitable, and to extend the legal percentage points in five years. be allowed to form civil unions or should ways struggled with moral issues on benefits of civil marriage to same-gender Equally Blessed is a coalition of receive no legal recognition. By compari- which the diocese and parishioners do couples and their children." faithful Catholics who support full equal- son, 16 percent of white evangelical not always agree. DeBernardo is the author of the ity for lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans- Christians approved of same-sex mar- Catholics believe God incarnates in booklet Marriage Equality: A Positive gender ( LGBT ) people both in the riages; 24 percent approved of civil un- diverse forms, Father Martinez said — Catholic Approach, which raised the ire church and in civil society. Equally ions. Among the general public, those like human beings. of Cardinal Donald Wuerl of Washington Blessed includes four organizations that rates climb to 37 and 27 percent, respec- ―Once you say that God is a human D. C., and Bishop Salvatore J. Cor- have spent a combined 112 years work- tively — still lower than among Catho- person — I mean we‘re just so varied dileone of Oakland, earlier this week. ing on behalf of LGBT people and their lics. and diverse that way — I think the real New Ways Ministry, they wrote, was not families: Call to Action, DignityUSA, Francis DeBernardo, executive di- Catholicity of that is to acknowledge that authorized to "identify itself as a Catho- Fortunate Families, and New Ways Min- rector of New Ways Ministry, an inde- and accept that,‖ he said.  lic organization." istry.  pendent group that has worked on gay "The bishops' approach to this issue Page 4 BONDINGS Vol. 31, No. 1 On the eve of Valentine's Day, protesters converge on Holy Name Same-sex marriage debate draws gay rights activists, opposition

By Tara Malone The protest, called Freedom to The Chicago Tribune Marry Day, marked the second year that gay rights activists gathered outside the

February 13, 2011 cathedral around Valentine's Day to champion gay rights and target the On the eve of Valentine's Day, Catholic Church. Helen Moshak pinned rainbow ribbons to "If we're going to win marriage her white knit cap and returned to the equality within this state, we'll have to be Roman Catholic Church she left five out in the streets like we are today," said years ago, dismayed by its opposition to Andy Thayer, co-founder of the Gay gay marriage when two of her three chil- Liberation Network, which helped organ- dren are gay. ize the protest. The 76-year-old Skokie woman did Theirs were not the only signs on not step foot inside Holy Name Cathe- display as parishioners skirted picket dral, the storied seat of the Roman lines on their way to worship. Catholic Archdiocese of Chicago. About a half-dozen people held Nor did she join in the picket line of placards that signaled opposition to same about 60 men and women — her son -sex marriage on the steps of the cathe- Damian Moshak and his partner among dral. Others with a ministry group Protestors outside Holy Name Cathedral, Chicago, on February 13, 2011. them — protesting the Catholic Church's sported T-shirts that read: "Love is the stance on gay marriage and other stances answer." they see as unjust to gay, lesbian, bisex- While he was not in town to attend quences of the new law. "This was an opportunity to stand up Sunday Mass, George acknowledged in a "There is a real difference between ual and transgender people. for the faith," Pat Peterson said. "I came Rather, Moshak stood across the statement that these are deeply felt, per- the sexual relationships of two men or because I support Cardinal (Francis) sonal issues on all sides. two women and the sexual relationships street from the downtown cathedral and George." held a sign that read: "Catholic parents of But he also said: "No matter the is- based on the complementarity of man The cardinal, along with the Catho- sue, Catholics should be able to worship and woman who assure the future of … gay kids know that all are equal before lic Conference of Illinois, opposed recent God." in peace, without fear of harassment." family," George said. "Quite apart from state legislation that legalized civil un- In a recent interview, George said the morality of it, it's apples and oranges. "I feel a bit shy. But then again, it's ions between gay and lesbian people. the right thing to do," Moshak said. the archdiocese asked its lawyers and It's not the same. Somehow the law The measure takes effect June 1. insurance experts to study the conse- should respect that difference."  Gay marriage lobbyists welcome Fr. Bob Maguire's pledge By Paul Tatnell and Anne Wright would be taking care of the two people Heraldsun.com.au involved and their friends and their asso- February 15, 2011 ciates," he said. In Victoria, gay couples can register Gay marriage lobbyists have wel- their relationships with the State Govern- comed Father Bob Maguire's public ment. pledge to conduct gay union ceremonies, The Catholic church yesterday reit- but claim he's not the first priest to speak erated its opposition to gay civil unions. out in favour of the cause. The Vicar General of the Archdio- Australia Marriage Equality national cese of Melbourne, Bishop Les secretary Peter Furness said this morning Tomlinson, said civil union ceremonies it was encouraging to see a Catholic involving homosexual couples were not priest speak publicly about the issue. allowed in any of its Melbourne's "There are many priests who support churches. and want the right to marry same sex The church believed "marriage is a couples," Mr Furness said. Fr Bob Maguire is open to performing civil union ceremonies for gays. union between a man and a woman". "(But) people are scared of their Fr Maguire said he would perform a personal view on gay civil unions. "Priests are authorised to officiate at bosses to do it publicly." civil ceremony for a homosexual couple The 75-year-old said he understood weddings according to the Catholic rite Mr Furness said a number of reli- - but not in a church. Catholic leaders would not want a gay and therefore any marriage performed by gious leaders had made submissions to a It follows moves in the UK to ceremony in a Catholic church so he a Catholic priest must be conducted in 2009 senate inquiry in favour of gay change laws so gay civil ceremonies can would arrange a private event. accordance with Catholic teaching," he marriage, but some were not willing to be carried out in churches. "I'd probably consult the bosses and said. go public with their views. Other Melbourne churches rejected then I'd go back to the clients and tell An Anglican Church spokesman "The Australian Christian Lobby the idea yesterday, despite opinion polls them we can't do it in here - it's not per- said none of its priests are allowed to would have us think that there is one showing a majority of Australians sup- sonal, it's institutional," he said. perform gay civil ceremonies. viewpoint from the church, but there‘s port gay marriage. Fr Maguire said it was "his duty" to Uniting Church general secretary not," he said. Pope Benedict last year labelled gay help people in need, including gay cou- Reverend Rob Brown said it had no pol- "There are lots of different view- marriage as "among some of the most ples. icy on gay civil unions being performed points. We have been contacted by many insidious and dangerous challenges fac- "Not only do I have an administra- in its churches.  religious leaders who have said they ing the common good today". tive responsibility but I have also pas- want to do gay ceremonies." Fr Maguire said he does not have a toral responsibility and pastoral care Los Angeles Archdiocesan Gay Ministry Celebrates 25th Year By R. W. Dellinger the Gospel; is shaped by church teach- what the cardinal wanted: integration. rate groups. The goal is simply to get The Tidings ings and pastoral practice; borrows ap- The more we can integrate gay and les- more people involved in their parishes. Los Angeles propriately from the insights of the social bian people within a parish structure, the And a new emphasis is working with March 11, 2011 and biological sciences; and listens, pon- better. More and more self-identified catechists, confirmation teachers and ders and prays over the lived experience gays and I talk with, once they Catholic high school teachers to educate At the same time Archbishop Roger of those it ministers to." know that they can believe that God them on what church teachings really are Mahony founded the Catholic HIV/AIDS In turn, the ministry calls on Catho- loves them, they feel much more com- concerning homosexual Catholics. Ministry on February 4, 1986, at Blessed lics to know and share in the challenges, fortable going into their church. So I "We're all called to full active par- Sacrament Church in Hollywood, he also burdens and blessings of gay and lesbian think integration is key." ticipation in our church," Fitzmaurice established the Ministry with Lesbian persons living a Christian life within the Arthur Fitzmaurice, co-leader of notes. "But there's been a lot of pain, a and Gay Catholics. Catholic tradition. And it condemns any MLGC, learned that at St. Monica lot of hurt and a lot of bitterness recently He proclaimed MLGC's primary actions where gays and lesbians are dis- Church in Santa Monica. In fact, the over Proposition 8 and the anti-gay mar- goal was "to foster a spirit of community criminated against in speech, behavior or graduate student studying neuroscience riage effort here in California. So we try and fellowship among gay and lesbian by law. at Cal Tech moved to the Westside be- to dialogue and explain how we have Catholics so that they can offer and re- "What's happened over the years, cause he had heard how welcoming the reconciled and share our own faith story. ceive mutual support in living out their both within the church and in the secular parish was to gays. Like St. Matthew's in "But it's very much an uphill battle," lives of faith with the church." world in the United States, is that the gay Long Beach, Blessed Sacrament in Hol- he acknowledges. "So we definitely fo- The ministry, in short, stresses that and lesbian community has been more lywood and Mary Immaculate in Pa- cus on the pastoral side that says 'God all individuals with a homosexual orien- welcomed --- especially as parent groups coima, St. Monica's even sponsored an made you this way. You're welcome to tation are able to live a full Catholic life have really taken on advocating on be- outreach ministry to gay and lesbian pa- participate in the Eucharist.'"  in union with all other members of the half of their parents," says Father Chris rishioners. church. According to its mission state- Ponnet, MLGC's chaplain. But he points out that the ministry's ment, "MLGC takes its inspiration from "And I think the prophetic role is mission is not really about starting sepa- Spring 2011 BONDINGS Page 5 The twelve steps of Courage: a stairway to denial By Jamie L. Manson The Twelve Steps of Courage, on Courage makes this connection between ing, wouldn't it be equally pastoral to ncronline.org the other hand, forces a gay person to homosexuality and addiction. He insists create Twelve Steps of Restraint for January 25, 2011 treat his innate sexual orientation as that those coming to the program are Straight, Single Catholics? negative, compulsive behavior that needs seeking "self-acceptance and self- Of all of the problems and inconsis- At a time when the Roman Catholic to be controlled. restraint." They need to practice such tencies of the Twelve Steps of Courage, Church in the United States is alienating Rather than freeing a gay person restraint, he says, because, "The exercise perhaps its most harmful aspect is the more people than welcoming them, they from the "burden" of his sexuality, the of sexuality is reserved for marriage and way it perpetuates denial -— ironically, seem to have found a new friend in Bill program enables him to fixate on his that can only happen between a man and the very behavior that addicts strive to W. sexuality as something shameful and in a woman." overcome. The Colorado Springs diocese has need of suppression. By promoting such But like so many Catholic defenders The Courage program aids the hier- decided to launch "The Twelve Steps of a painful, internal struggle, the Twelve of marriage, Brennan fails to mention archy in denying that same-sex relation- Courage," one of the programs of Courage Steps of Courage can limit a person's that this same doctrine applies to hetero- ships have as much potential for personal International, which was founded by Fr. capacity to create healthy, loving rela- sexuals who have sex outside of the growth and spiritual depth as heterosex- John Harvey in 1980. tionships. bonds of marriage. As psychologist and ual relationships. The sad thing is, many Courage boasts 110 chapters world- Rather than liberating him, this pro- systematic theologian Daniel Helminiak Catholic clerics in the United States are wide dedicated to helping gay Catholics gram ultimately stunts a gay person's writes, "Just as it is objectively wrong already well aware of this truth. Some lead celibate lives. As the new program's freedom to develop into the beloved for unmarried heterosexuals to engage in have seen it in their families and in their name indicates, it is modeled after the creation that God intended. sex, so too are homosexual acts consid- parishioners, and some have even experi- Twelve Step recovery process practiced If there were a connection between ered to be wrong." enced it themeslves. by groups like Alcoholics Anonymous. addiction and homosexuality, it would be Once again, the hierarchy conven- But denial is what the hierarchy Given that Colorado Springs is the that some gay and lesbian people become iently forgets that all non-married indi- seems to model best these days: whether home base of Focus on the Family (for addicts when they are made to feel viduals should practice chastity, not just it's denying communion to women reli- whom Christian-based, anti-gay propa- ashamed of their God-given desires. gay and lesbian people. gious who use their consciences, denying ganda is a cottage industry), and given The emotional turmoil of being told We all know that many single het- justice for sexual abuse survivors, or that its bishop, Michael Sheridan, is the that their acts of intimacy are intrinsi- erosexual Catholics have active sex denying the dignity of women called to prophet of denying Eucharist to certain cally disordered has caused some to seek lives. Shouldn't the church also offer ordained ministry. Catholic voters and politicians, it's a won- out drugs or alcohol to numb them from them support in their attempt to retrain It is, of course, the prerogative of der they didn't promote the Twelve Steps the pain. Others have become addicted to their sexual needs? Surely some of them the hierarchy to continue to tow the de- of Courage decades ago. self-destructive behaviors as a way to must feel that their lives are unmanage- nial line. I only wish that they would Unlike their Evangelical neighbors, cope with or avoid the spiritual agony of able because they, too, are powerless refrain from co-opting the value and the the priests facilitating this chapter of repressing an authentic desire to love. over their desires for sex. power of the Twelve Step tradition in the Courage insist that homosexuality cannot Brennan, of course, would deny that If we follow Brennan's line of think- process.  be cured through "reparative therapy" programs. They claim to support the Catholic doctrine that homosexuality is Fr. John Harvey, OSFS, founder of 'Courage,' has died not a choice and is not a sin in itself. "It's not about therapy and not about web.me.com/kmnadolski/In_Memoriam at Catholic University; professor of activism," said Fr. Larry Brennan, director December 27, 2010 moral theology at Dunbarton College, of priest formation for the diocese of Washington, DC; professor of moral Colorado Springs. "It's about support." Reverend John F. Harvey, OSFS, theology at the DeSales Hall School of And yet, if you put the Twelve Steps 92, an Oblate of St. Francis de Sales for Theology; president of DeSales Hall of Courage and the Twelve Steps of Alco- 73 years, died on Monday, December 27, School of Theology; and professor of holics Anonymous side by side, there is 2010, at Union Hospital in Elkton, sexual and medical ethics at DeSales only one difference between the two lists. Maryland. University, Center Valley, PA. Fr. Har- Courage places the word "homosexuality" Fr. Harvey, son the late Patrick J. vey retired in January, 2010. where AA has the word "addiction." and Margaret (Harkins) Harvey was born Fr. Harvey was the founder and na- The first step of the new program in Philadelphia in 1918. He attended St. tional director of Courage, which is a reads like this: Columba Parish School, and after gradu- spiritual support group for homosexual "We admitted that we were powerless ating from Northeast Catholic High women and men. He had been director over homosexuality and our lives had School for Boys in 1936, he entered the of Courage since its foundation in 1980 become unmanageable." Oblate Novitiate, making his first profes- at the request of the late archbishop of Since both programs use identical sion of vows on September 8, 1937. He New York, Terrence Cardinal language, how could one not conclude was ordained to the priesthood on June Cooke. Courage continues to reach out that Courage encourages gay people to 3, 1944 at the Cathedral of Saints Peter in the United States, in Canada, England, view their sexual orientations the same and Paul in Philadelphia by the Most. Fr. John Harvey, OSFS the Republic of Ireland, Poland, Mexico, way addicts view their addictions? What Rev. Hugh Lamb, D.D., Auxiliary Slovakia, Singapore, Hong Kong, Aus- other goal could there be than some form Bishop of Philadelphia. would take him all over the country and tralia, the Philippines, and New Zea- of recovery? After earning his bachelor of arts world to offer a voice of compassion,‖ land. Today, there are more than 100 In his masterpiece, Addiction and degree in philosophy in 1941 from Rev. James J. Greenfield, OSFS, Oblate Chapters of Courage worldwide. Grace, psychiatrist and spiritual director Catholic University of America in Wash- provincial said. ―His work in helping to Since he began teaching in higher Gerald May defines addiction as "a state ington, D.C., Fr. Harvey continued his found both the DeSales School of Theol- education in 1948, Fr. Harvey has writ- of compulsion, obsession, or preoccupa- studies, earning graduate degrees in psy- ogy and Courage were examples of his ten more than 45 articles in professional tion that enslaves a person's will and de- chology and theology, and completed a commitment to the Church that he loved theological and psychological journals sire." doctorate in moral theology there 10 so much.‖ on questions of human sexuality and He continues: "Addiction sidetracks years later. Fr. Harvey‘s ministerial assignments counseling. He has addressed the full and eclipses the energy of our deepest, ―Fr. Harvey‘s commitment to pas- following ordination included serving as convention of the United States Confer- truest desire for love and goodness. . . . it toral care in the Church was tire- a teacher at his alma mater, Northeast ence of Catholic Bishops on ethics and erodes an individual's freedom, will, and less. Even in his later years, his travel Catholic High School ; graduate student psychology.  capacity for love." Programs such as AA help addicts find a way to admit their powerlessness ’s Cardinal Vs. Ricky Martin against their addiction. An addict surren- ders her will and her life to her Higher Ontopmag.com iors, and trying to promote homosexual- Power in the hope of driving herself to- April 13, 2011 ity or sexual promiscuity among our ward greater personal and spiritual youth, indeed, is immoral regardless of growth. Cardinal Luis Aponte Martinez of where it comes from.‖ On the contrary, the Twelve Steps of San Juan, Puerto Rico has asked singer Gay rights activist Pedro Julio Courage asks not for surrender to God, Ricky Martin to set a good example for Serrano criticized the cardinal in the but for submission to a doctrine that de- young people and stop promoting being same publication. mands that a gay person repress her God- gay. ― disguised as religion given sexual orientation. Rather than help- In an interview with Primera Hora and under the pretext of freedom of ing a gay person find ways to integrate her published late last week, Martinez railed speech is still homophobia and it kills,‖ sexuality into the whole of her being, it against the Puerto Rican father of twin Serrano said. ―Enough of wanting to fractures any development toward a boys Matteo and Valentino. Martin an- impose a moral vision of human sexual- healthy relationship with her sexuality. nounced he's gay last March. ity. Sexual orientation is an innate char- Programs like AA help addicts shatter ―Personally, I admire Ricky for the acteristic of the human condition that the delusion that they can control their great artistic gifts the Lord has endowed cannot be changed, it is not a behavior, it compulsive, habitual behaviors. It helps him, but please, for the love of his chil- is not a disease, and it is not synony- them break free of their fixation on self- dren, for whom I imagine he wants the mous with promiscuity as argued by destructive needs, and helps them regain best, try to set an example to our youth Cardinal Aponte Martinez.‖ their presence to themselves and their of the great values we all share, besides Last month, Pastor Wanda Rolon, relationships. By moving away from the sex.‖ an influential social conservative in enslavements of addiction, they enter into He added that the Roman Catholic Puerto Rico, said Martin was leading a new freedom that allows them to begin church ―does not reject the homosexual people to ―hell.‖  to rebuild their lives. [but] their immoral actions and behav- Ricky Martin Page 6 BONDINGS Vol. 31, No. 1 Parents of gay children should push their churches By Mark Hare Casey says it's not that simple. a "listening network" of parent volun- www.democratandchronicle.com The church also teaches that celi- teers who lend an ear to other parents January 6, 2011 bacy is a gift. Not everyone has it; must who are struggling with questions about all gays live celibate lives if they do not their children's sexual orientation. When Casey and Mary Ellen Lo- have the gift? The church, he says, also "In the '90s, when we talked to other pata's son Jim told them in 1983 that he teaches that no one is obliged to do what parents, there were tears and fear," Casey is gay, the coming-out turned their world is impossible for them. says. "Today, there's fire and ire." There upside down. They never wavered in Jim went to college at Miami Uni- is a growing sense that many churches their love for Jim, 19 at the time, or in versity of Ohio and they would have long have not gone far enough, and parents their love for and devotion to the Catho- talks on some of those trips back and are angry. lic Church. forth, Mary Ellen recalls. On one trip, "There will never be change if peo- For Casey, the question was, "Can she asked him — inartfully — if he ple don't talk," Mary Ellen says. They Jim be Catholic and gay?" For Mary would change if he could. Jim said he started Fortunate Families because they Ellen, the challenge of Jim's revelation would not, that God had made him who wanted to "go national," Casey says. was about love. "There was no doubt in he is. "I was glad to hear that he was "We thought that parents — who are my mind that he was a good person and comfortable with who he was," she says, often pillars of the community and active that God loved him," she says. but even more important, "I realize that in their churches — have the greatest In the early '80s, the Lopatas say, no being gay was integral to who he was, opportunity to make a difference." one talked about homosexuality. They that he would not be that person if he But many parents are themselves felt isolated. And as opposition to gay Casey and Mary Ellen Lopata were not gay. And I loved that person." "on the edge" of leaving churches where rights became more hostile, especially in be a voice for compassion within the In 2004, the Lopatas formed Fortu- their children do not feel welcome. Par- churches, Mary Ellen says, "it became church. Casey, who has a master's of nate Families ents, Mary Ellen says, "need to find their clear that the people making the rules divinity degree, speaks and writes about (www.fortunatefamilies.com), a resource voices and be not afraid." didn't know any gay or lesbian people." the theological perspective. and networking ministry for Catholic Churches need to be pushed and For several years, the Lopatas The church, he says, teaches that parents of gay, lesbian, bisexual and prodded, and yes, loved, into acceptance. worked with Catholic Gay and Lesbian homosexuality, which is not a choice but transgender children. The group works Change will come, Casey says. It always Family Ministry of the Diocese of Roch- an orientation, is not sinful. Only homo- primarily with Catholic families, but does.  ester, which gradually built a network of sexual relations, which, like any sexual welcomes others. The website collects families willing to share their stories and activity outside marriage, is sinful. But and shares personal stories and includes Archdiocese issues no-discrimination admissions policy By Lisa Wangsness lic Schools Foundation, which gives mil- diocese and the guidance the diocese and by and large very affirming of gay The Globe lions in scholarships to low-income stu- gives in those judgment calls is clearer people, and the hierarchy and the doc- January 13, 2011 dents, said it would not subsidize tuition today than it was then.‘‘ trine are lagging decades behind.‘‘ at any school with a discriminatory ad- He added that the archdiocese But Charles G. Martel, cofounder of The Archdiocese of Boston, under missions policy. Michael B. Reardon, stands ready to ―work hand-in-hand with Catholics for Marriage Equality, said he fire from all sides after a parochial executive director of the foundation, said the pastors and principals when there are hopes dioceses around the country will school withdrew an admissions offer to yesterday his organization is pleased judgment calls.‘‘ adopt Boston‘s guidelines. ―It very much the child of a lesbian couple, yesterday with the new policy‘s ―clear message of Rafferty was among those who par- conveys the message that children of released a new Catholic schools admis- inclusiveness.‘‘ ticipated in the drafting of the new pol- same-sex couples are welcome to re- sions policy that said parochial schools ―From the perspective of the founda- icy. In a statement through the archdio- ceive a Catholic education,‘‘ he said. will not ―discriminate against or exclude tion, the key part of this is that it does not cese yesterday, he said: ―I welcome the Under the new policy, individual any categories of students.‘‘ exclude any group of students, and it fact that we now have a clear policy to Catholic schools may draft their own However, the policy, which was promotes what is essential to Catholic guide us in the important work of Catho- admissions guidelines, but they must be distributed to pastors, parishes, and education, which is inclusivity,‘‘ he said. lic education.‘‘ ―written, included in the school hand- school administrators by e-mail, said Because the new policy said admis- Catholic doctrine defines marriage book, consider the welfare and best in- school parents ―must accept and under- sions decisions should be based in part as a heterosexual union and considers terests of the child and be disseminated stand that the teachings of the Catholic on ―the best interest of the child,‘‘ it re- homosexual acts ―intrinsically disor- to prospective students and their parents Church are an essential and required part mains uncertain whether the Hingham dered.‘‘ Some have argued that inherent prior to registration.‘‘ of the curriculum.‘‘ episode would have occurred had the conflicts between church teachings and a Some schools already have such The new guidelines were developed new policy been in place. The specifics child‘s family situation may be harmful policies in place. St. John‘s Preparatory by a panel of clergy and lay school ad- of that case remain unclear because the to a child in Catholic school, although School in Danvers, which has 1,250 ministrators at the direction of Cardinal pastor involved, the Rev. James F. the Catholic schools are open to children boys in grades 9 to 12, selects students Sean P. O‘Malley in response to a widely Rafferty, has declined interviews. of couples who are divorced, which the based on entrance exams, grades, and publicized incident last year in which St. ―The situation at St. Paul‘s in Catholic catechism calls ―a grave of- teacher recommendations. The school Paul School in Hingham rescinded the Hingham may have taken a different fense against the natural law,‘‘ and to has a policy that prohibits discrimination admissions offer to the 8-year-old boy. route, but it might have come to the same non-Catholics. ―based on race, color, national/ethnic The archdiocese helped place the boy in conclusion,‘‘ said the Rev. Richard M. Marianne Duddy-Burke, executive origin, religion, physical ability, sexual a different Catholic school. Erikson, vicar general of the Archdiocese director of the gay Catholic organization orientation, social class, or economic The Hingham episode drew sharp of Boston. ―Father Rafferty still today DignityUSA, praised the archdiocese for status.‘‘ criticism from prominent funders of has the authority to make these decisions banning discrimination but wondered About 20 percent of students at St. Catholic education in Boston. The Catho- as the pastor. But the expectations of the whether pastors and principals would John‘s are not Catholic, about the same interpret what is in ―the best interest of proportion as in archdiocesan schools the child‘‘ evenhandedly for all families. generally. Principal Edward P. Hardi- Theologian: many priests are gay ―As long as the doctrine stands, it man said the question of whether to ad- makes it really hard for the pastoral and mit the children of gay parents ―hasn‘t By Molly Muldoon with his religious beliefs. During his the doctrinal aspects of our faith not to been an issue for us at all,‘‘ but he IrishCentral.com teenage years, he became associated with come into a clash,‘‘ Duddy-Burke said. praised the new policy yesterday.  November 23, 2010, conservative Catholics and German aris- ―The people of the church are changing, tocrats and industrialists. Homophobia within the Catholic ―I had to listen to despicable re- Church stems from the significant num- marks, praising Hitler for having homo- bers of closeted gay priests according to sexuals imprisoned and murdered in con- You can stay in touch with a German theologian. centration camps,‖ he said. the latest news and opinions David Berger, a former publisher of He claims that while he worked as a concerning the a Catholic magazine, has called for correspondent for the Pontifical Acad- Rome to own up to its homosexual emy of St. Thomas Aquinas in the Vati- Catholic Church and the LGBT community priests and reform its attitudes and teach- can, his writings on homosexual themes by visiting New Ways Ministry’ s website ing practices on the subject. were censored. ―It must be acknowledged that a Mr. Berger announced that he was large number of Catholic clerics and gay in April after the Bishop of Essen, www.newwaysministry.org trainee priests in Europe and the United Franz-Josef Overbeck, described homo- States are homosexually-inclined,‖ Mr. sexuality as perverse when he appeared Berger told Der Spiegel magazine. on a television chat show. You can also find information on the website ―The worst homophobia in the According to the theologian, as a about programs, events, and resources Catholic Church comes from homophile gay man in a long term relationship, he which may be helpful to you and your faith community. priests, who are desperately fighting their has been a victim of the homophobic own sexuality,‖ he said. atmosphere maintained by the church for ―Obviously, those who follow their years. Please consider becoming urges are repudiated more fiercely when He now works as a secondary school New Ways Ministry’ s one is so painfully repressing that dispo- teacher near Cologne. friend on Facebook sition oneself.‖ Mr. Berger has written a book enti- Berger admits he spent his life at- tled Der heilig Schein (The Holy Illu- and tempting to reconcile his homosexuality sion), about his time in the church.  following us on Twitter. Spring 2011 BONDINGS Page 7 My gay son: the face of the church's lack of respect

By Brian Cahill waiting to be adopted. We know that Catholics from those of irrational, homo- continue through the courts. The San Francisco Chronicle these children have been victimized by phobic extremists, and they would defi- The issue of same-sex marriage will March 13, 2011 the inability, neglect or abuse of their nitely not feel respected. also be on the ballot again. The propo- heterosexual parents. These mothers and Prior to the passage of Prop. 8, the nents of Prop. 8 have said that the voters' I am a Catholic who voted against fathers are living proof that sexual orien- California Supreme Court ruled that as a wishes should be respected. They should Proposition 8 in 2008 and contributed tation is not a reliable indicator of good matter of constitutional law, gays and be careful what they wish for. In 2000, $1,000 to the No on 8 Campaign, a parenting. they won with 61 percent of the vote. In Catholic who is sustained by regular Our bishops are clear that gays and I know that my 2008, they won with 53 percent of the Mass, scripture and prayer. I am also the lesbians must be respected and not dis- vote. In 2012, we will see how well they father of a gay son, from whom I was paraged, and I know they mean it. The respect the voters' wishes. slow to learn how painful, debilitating archbishop of San Francisco, regardless son and his partner I know that my son and his partner and denigrating are the constant legal of his position on Prop. 8, means it. His are made in the image and likeness of and social reminders that he and those first response to specific issues regarding are made God. They are not perfect, but they are like him are not fully accepted members gays and lesbians is always pastoral. brilliant, creative, personable and moral. of the human community. But when gays and lesbians are re- in the image and They are certainly not objectively disor- In their statement supporting Prop. ferred to in a 2003 Vatican teaching as dered. I know, as do many fathers, moth- 8, the California Catholic Bishops de- "objectively disordered," it is difficult for likeness of God. ers, grandparents, sisters, brothers, clared that marriage is "intrinsic to sta- them to feel respected. When gay and friends, neighbors, co-workers and fel- ble, flourishing and hospitable societies." lesbian couples are willing to assume low parishioners of gay and lesbian indi- Ironically, this is one of the compelling full, loving parental responsibility for viduals and couples, that the relationship, reasons gay and lesbian couples wish to abused and neglected children who lesbians have a right to form a family the love, the friendship, the personal as- be joined in civil marriages. They are would otherwise languish in the foster relationship. From the court's perspec- sociation, the proximity, put a human seeking a structure and context for their care system, and church teaching charac- tive, a family relationship is much more face on this issue and let us see that in love, commitment, fidelity and mutual terizes them as "doing great violence to than a domestic partnership. It is about the context of the human spirit, none of support. children" by raising them in same-sex marriage. us are different and none of us should be Many believe that the ideal for chil- households, it is difficult for those par- In August 2010, the federal District anything less than fully accepted mem- dren is to be raised by a mother and a ents to feel respected. And if gays and Court ruled that laws defining marriage bers of our human community.  father, yet we know what the divorce rate lesbians were to read some of the blog- as heterosexual are unconstitutional and is among heterosexual couples. We know gers on conservative Catholic websites, unjust. Even if the Ninth U.S. Circuit Brian Cahill is the former executive there are 75,000 children in the Califor- they might have difficulty distinguishing Court of Appeals allows the resumption director of Catholic Charities in San nia foster care system, a quarter of them the comments of thoughtful conservative of same sex-marriages, this issue will Francisco. Gramick tells Columbia students, ‘We are the church’

By Gary Barlow bia and Common Ground, a student In 1999, after periodic attempts by ―So one Sunday I heard this story of www.nowingaychicago.com group. church leaders to get her to stop her gay how this one woman was standing up to April 8, 2011 Gramick, who became a nun in and lesbian ministry, Gramick got an the church,‖ Rick told the students. ―That 1960, began her gay and lesbian ministry order from Ratzinger, then head of the they were ordering her to be silent was CHICAGO – For about 15 years, in 1971 after meeting and becoming Vatican‘s Congregation for the Doctrine just an outrage. I said this is going to be Sister Jeannine Gramick quietly built up of Faith. In it, Ratzinger prohibited her my next movie.‖ Catholic ministries that reached out to from working The film, which has won numerous gay and lesbian people, told them they with gays and awards, also followed Gramick back to deserved full acceptance in the church lesbians, express- the Vatican to drop off a copy of the Ital- and worked to reconcile the church and ing his annoy- ian translation of her book, Building the gay and lesbian community. a n c e t h a t Bridges, at Ratzinger‘s office. ―He didn‘t Then there‘s been the past 25 years, Gramick ―simply even send a thank-you note,‖ Gramick since the Vatican began, first, to investi- refused to ex- joked. gate her activities, then ordered her to press any assent Gramick said lay Catholics are far cease all pastoral work with lesbians and whatsoever to the ahead of Catholic leaders on gay issues. gays, a directive that came from the per- teaching of the ―This happens in a lot of religious sonal hand of no less than Cardinal Jo- Church on homo- traditions, where the people lead their seph Ratzinger, who became Pope Bene- sexuality.‖ religious leaders,‖ Gramick said. ―The dict XVI a short time later. Gramick‘s order real people who matter are the people in And Gramick‘s response? ―I think the subsequently these religious institutions who may not best way we convey how we believe is upped the pres- be the leaders, the people in the pews.‖ not words; it‘s the way we act,‖ Gramick sure on her but in The Catholic Church would better fulfil told students at Columbia College Chi- 2001 she trans- its mission, Gramick said, by listening to cago April 1. ferred to another those people and meeting them without If anything, the Vatican pressure has order, the Sisters judgment. only made Gramick more resolute in her of Loretto, which ―When we say ‗church,‘ most of us efforts to get the Catholic Church to treat supports her min most of the time really mean ‗church lesbians and gays as full and equal mem- istry. leaders.‘ I‘d like to get back to the peo- bers of its flock. The film by Rick, ple. It‘s really the people in the church,‖ Gramick talked with the Columbia who‘s won a Gramick said. ―The church needs to have students after a screening of In Good Peabody and a little conversion, and we have to realize Conscience: Sister Jeannine Gramick’s Sister Jeannine Gramick multiple Emmy that we are the church.‖  Journey of Faith, the award-winning friends with a gay man. She would go on awards for other works, tells the story of 2004 documentary film by filmmaker to help found three organizations for gay how Gramick resisted the Vatican pres- For more information about Barbara Rick, who accompanied and lesbian Catholics but by the 1980s sure. Rick and legendary filmmaker Al- Gramick and In Good Conscience, go to Gramick for the screening and discussion the culture wars had heated up even in bert Maysles (Gimme Shelter and Grey ingoodconscience.com. at Columbia. The screening and discus- the Catholic Church, leading to the Gardens) followed Gramick to the Vati- sion was sponsored by the LGBTQ Of- pushback against Gramick from can in 2003, chronicling her attempts to fice of Culture & Community at Colum- Ratzinger and the Vatican. get a meeting with Ratzinger. In Great Britain Tribunal Rejects Catholic Care's Gay Adoption Appeal Bbc.co.uk missed the charity‘s appeal. couples could get adoption services from It said it had heard expert evidence April 27, 2011 The tribunal said it would be ―a loss local authorities and other voluntary which contradicted the charity‘s case to society‖ if the charity stopped its agencies and said failure to secure the that, if it were to close, children would A Roman Catholic charity has lost adoption service but said it was ―by no exemption would hit the voluntary dona- be left unadopted. its latest appeal against equality laws means certain‖ this would happen. tions which keep it afloat. It said other Roman Catholic chari- which allow gay couples to use adoption ‗Balance the risk‘ The Bishop of Leeds, the Right Rev- ties had found alternative means of oper- services. It said it had to balance the risk of erend Arthur Roche, told the tribunal that ating since the law changed. Catholic Care, run by the Diocese of the service closing against the ―detriment he believed the law should respect the Rt Rev Roche said: ―Catholic Care Leeds, argued it would have to give up to same-sex couples and the detriment to Roman Catholic church‘s views on the is very disappointed with this ruling.‖ its adoption service if it was not made society generally of permitting the dis- issue in the same way that it allowed Laura Doughty, the deputy chief exempt from the law. crimination proposed‖. churches not to have to bless civil part- executive of the gay equality charity The case has already been rejected The charity argued that its stance nerships. Stonewall, said it applauded the decision. by the High Court last year and the Char- attracted potential adopters who did not The tribunal also said there was no  ity Commission. approach other agencies. evidence, except for the bishop‘s opin- Now the Charity Tribunal has dis- It told the tribunal that same-sex ion, that donated income would be hit. Page 8 BONDINGS Vol. 31, No. 1 St. John's University students protest gay-straight alliance ban

By Clare Trapasso part of the student population," said open to ideas and discussions. We're not The Daily News Spriggs, who is not gay. "Whether or not closing the door to anything." New York The school should have an alliance, the Catholic Church He added that St. John's doesn't dis- April 18, 2011 he said, to give lesbian, gay, bisexual criminate or attempt to change the views and transgender students a voice on cam- wants to admit it, of LGBT students. "The university does About 20 students staged a sit-in at pus. A sanctioned club would also make there are not expect its students to compromise St. John's University to protest the the group eligible for campus funding. their identities and values," he said. Catholic school's refusal to a allow a gay Students were also quick to point gay people "And St. John's students should not ex- -straight alliance on its Jamaica campus. out that the school allows a slew of eth- pect that the university compromise its The students, who sat on St. John's nic and religious organizations, including who are own institutional identities and values." Great Lawn making rainbow-colored gay Jewish and Muslim groups. part of their Shane Windmeyer, executive direc- rights posters on Friday, said they have "The school prides itself a lot on tor of Campus Pride, a Charlotte, N.C.- been petitioning to create the alliance on being diverse," said senior Sergio Cueto, churches and society based group that strives to create LGBT- campus for years. 23, of El Paso, Tex. "But this is one of at large." friendly colleges and universities, said Each time, the school's administra- the areas it's lagging behind on." St. John's stance isn't realistic. tion has rejected it - citing the Catholic Cueto said he has always felt safe as "Gay-straight alliances provide visi- values upon which the university was a gay male on campus, a sentiment ech- bility, education and support for LGBT founded. oed by other students. University spokes- —Shane and straight ally students," he said. "We need a gay-straight alliance at man Dominic Scianna said St. John's Windmeyer "Whether or not the Catholic Church St. John's for the same reason that there created a program in 2009 to provide wants to admit it, there are gay people are organizations for other minorities," support for LGBT students. Safe Zone who are part of their churches and soci- said senior Tim Spriggs, 20, of Colum- was a result of discussions with students "At this current time, we would not ety at large."  bia, Md. pushing for a gay-straight club on cam- approve a gay-straight alliance because The school is "ignoring a significant pus. of who we are," Scianna said. "But we're At a Catholic cemetery: All welcome, with just one catch

By Dianne Williamson be allowed to call each other something ―Questions come up from time to time, I've chosen to remain Catholic but I'm The Worcester Telegram and Gazette like ―faithful companion‖ or ―loyal so he made the norms more clear.‖ almost ready to leave. I'm devastated that Worcester, Massachusetts friend.‖ Which prompted a bemused The memo states that nothing in St. as a good Catholic kid who hung in March 20, 2011 Darisse to wonder if he should change John's Cemetery or in any other local there, the church would insist on doing his name to Lassie or Rin Tin Tin. Catholic cemetery can contain anything this.‖ When Massachusetts became the first ―I couldn't believe it,‖ said Troy, who that would contravene church doctrine, If you're on the team you must play state in the nation to legalize gay mar- was raised Catholic and goes to church ―as determined by and at the sole discre- by the rules, I guess. Still, the bishop's riage, Dennis Troy wrote an impassioned every Sunday. ―After fighting for so tion of the Roman Catholic Bishop of- policy seems needlessly petty and small letter to Margaret Marshall, the Supreme long, even now, when I die, I'll be dis- Worcester.‖ minded, especially now, when lifelong Court justice who penned the landmark criminated against.‖ In other words, tough luck to gay and loyal Catholics are harder to come ruling. Raymond L. Delisle, the diocesan married Catholics. They can live as by. He wrote about growing up gay in vice chancellor for operations, confirmed spouses, but they can't die that way in ―Maybe I'll outlive the bishop and Worcester, about the bullying and the that Bishop McManus prohibits any lan- any of the more than 20 Catholic ceme- we'll see what happens,‖ Troy said. ―I taunts, about the abuse that led to alcohol guage on a marker or tombstone that teries in Worcester County. know it's just one word, but it means so and the belief that he wasn't ―normal.‖ doesn't conform to Catholic teachings. Troy said that his parents, grandpar- much. This is my last resting place. Give After struggling for years, he eventually By way of explanation, he sent me a ents and other relatives are buried at St. me some peace. He's saying I can't even got sober and met the man he would bishop's memorandum dated July 16 of John's, so he won't go elsewhere. Be- be normal in death. But this is 2011 and spend his life with. The only thing miss- 2004, two months after gay marriage sides, his mother paid for the plot. things have changed.‖ ing was validation, which came when he became legal here. ―Richard is my legal spouse,‖ he But not everything.  opened the newspaper in May 2004. ―It's just a clarification,‖ Delisle said. noted. ―I'm angry and hurt by my church. ―I honestly don't recall how long I sat there with tears streaming down my face,‖ Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Repeal he wrote. ―All the hurt, all the broken windows, all the beatings disappeared in that one headline. I was afraid to rejoice A Victory for Honesty and Anti-Discrimination lest it was some kind of joke or I had mis- interpreted it. But sure enough, it was By Maureen Fiedler, SL The Bishops were not, however, in true. The Supreme Court of Massachusetts Ncronline.org the forefront of efforts to repeal this leg- had declared me ‗normal.'‖ January 7, 2011 islation. But despite Troy's status as a legally Still, they should cheer it. This his- married adult, there are still some hold- I wonder if any Catholic bishops toric vote ends discrimination on the overs who seek to remind him that he's were popping champagne corks on Sat- basis of sexual orientation in the mili- not ―normal.‖ The Catholic Church and urday when the U.S. Senate overcame tary, and it restores a sense of personal Bishop Robert J. McManus, for example, the final legislative hurdles and repealed integrity and honesty for service mem- still insist on stigmatizing the loving and the policy known as ―don‘t ask, don‘t bers who are gay or lesbian. Now, sol- legal bond that they encourage for every- tell.‖ I‘d like to think at least some of diers can admit who they are without one except homosexuals. them joined the vast majority of lay fear of recrimination. They can own Troy is 62 and retired from a longtime Catholics who welcome the end of this Maureen Fiedler, SL their identity with friends and colleagues career as recreation therapist at the former onerous policy. without fear of being drummed out of Worcester State Hospital. He's married to For whatever the Bishops think teachings of the Church make it clear the service. his partner of 15 years, Richard J. Darisse. about the theology of homosexuality, that the fundamental human rights of This is an historic vote for civil He's a happy guy. they are – on paper, at least – opposed to homosexual persons must be defended rights that Catholics and others should In January, though, Troy's 75-year-old discrimination on the basis of sexual and that all of us must strive to eliminate cheer.  sister died. She was buried in the family orientation. As they said in their pas- any forms of injustice, oppression, or plot at St. John's Cemetery, the one Troy's toral letter, Always Our Children: ―The violence against them…" mother bought more than three decades ago. His sister's death prompted Troy to start thinking about his own mortality, and a week later he returned to St John's to Priest champions non-discrimination ordinance ensure that his resting place was in order. By Timothy Kincaid tracts with the city. He spoke with Robert Ackerman, di- Boxturtlebulletin.com ―I ask you to approve this bill ban- rector of diocesan cemeteries. He said March 15, 2011 ning discrimination by city contractors Ackerman was kind and assured him that against gay, lesbian and transgender peo- both he and his husband could be buried It isn‘t that often that I have any- ple,‖ Breen wrote in a letter sent to each in the family plot. As Troy noted, though, thing complimentary to say about the member of Nashville‘s Metro Council ―There's always a ‗but' when the Catholic current state of the Catholic Church and (and also published in the Tennessean). Church is involved.‖ its practices, so I‘m not letting this op- ―I fully support the spirit of inclusion Ackerman explained that the bishop portunity pass by. rather than exclusion in our great city ―doesn't mind‖ that gay couples are buried Rev. Joseph Breen of the St. Edward and ask you to do the same with your in the cemetery, Troy recalled. But the Church in Nashville, Tennessee is stand- vote of approval,‖ he added. bishop won't allow gay people who are ing up for the LGBT community. Clearly Father Breen has given up married to reflect that status in any form Breen penned a letter to the Metro on any hope of ever becoming bishop on their final resting place. In other Council that also ran in the Tennessean and is now just seeking to better the lives words, no marker or tombstone can be this week encouraging the elected offi- of those in his parish, his city, and his inscribed with the word ―spouse,‖ cials to get behind a bill meant to elimi- community. I wonder if the Diocese will ―husband‖ or ―wife.‖ nate anti-gay bias when it comes to con- retaliate.  Rather, Troy and Darisse would only Rev. Joseph Breen Spring 2011 BONDINGS Page 9 A Catholic School Meets a Challenge: To Xavier High School, ‘Laramie Project’ Is No Big Deal

By Samuel G. Freedman On the inclusive side, a 1997 letter by What that means for students like all, the year of the murder. As he was Nytimes.com American bishops entitled ―Always Our Xavier‘s can be distilled to a single, cast last spring and rehearsed all this fall, December 17, 2010 Children‖ said that homosexuality could fashionable phrase of derision: ―That‘s he kept learning why the Shepard story not be ―considered sinful‖ and that ho- so gay.‖ Adam Salazar, a 17-year-old still mattered. When Eric Ostrow was hired last year mosexuals should not be pushed into senior from Brooklyn, knew it well; he ―I was talking about what the new to teach drama at Xavier High School in therapy to try to change them. While used it often. ―If someone was a loser, if school play is,‖ he recalled of a conver- Manhattan, as a newcomer he chose two calling on homosexuals to remain chaste, sation with classmates. ―And I said, it‘s impeccably innocuous shows for student the letter maintained, ―God does not love The Xavier about this homosexual kid who gets productions. The first was a comedy, someone any less simply because he or killed. And as soon as I said, ―Epic Proportions,‖ and then came the she is homosexual.‖ production serves as ‗homosexual,‘ their faces go pale.‖ He musical ―Grease,‖ with its script scrubbed On the other flank, however, a 1986 paused. ―Just today, I heard a kid call of profanity and one character‘s unwed letter from the Congregation for the Doc- a kind of marker for another kid the f-word‖ — faggot — pregnancy papered over in euphemisms. trine of the Faith, prepared when Pope ―because he didn‘t give him a high-five.‖ Then, late last spring, Mr. Ostrow Benedict was its leader, described homo- all that has and has Marc Rugani, a religion teacher at presented school administrators with his sexuality as a ―more or less strong ten- Xavier, began discussing the play in his wish list for year two. It was to stage ―The dency toward an intrinsic moral evil.‖ not changed in the classes weeks before the performances. Laramie Project,‖ Moises Kaufman‘s play And over the years, America‘s bishops Initially, he felt the students were reti- about the murder of a gay college student, have formally campaigned against both cent ―to breach this taboo topic.‖ After Matthew Shepard. And if Mr. Ostrow same-sex marriage and civil unions. dozen years since the show, that reluctance has given way thought he might be shocking his bosses ―The debate within the church is to a ―better understanding of the magni- with the proposal, then he was soon whether to view innate attraction to the Mr. Shepard’s tude of hate.‖ shocked in return. same sex as a deformity of human nature Angel Vicisio, a cast member, put it Not only did Xavier‘s president and or as an alternative form of human sex- murder. this way: ―I‘ve learned we are the gen- headmaster approve the plan for ual nature,‖ said Prof. Lisa Sowle Cahill, eration that has a chance to change this.‖ ―Laramie,‖ they informed Mr. Ostrow that a professor of Christian ethics at Boston One production, of course, remains he was not exactly breaking new ground. College. ―Statistics show that younger someone was weird,‖ he recalled, ―that one production. Of the 100 licensed stu- Xavier had performed ―Laramie‖ in the religious people, including Catholics, are was the word you used.‖ dent productions of ―Laramie‖ last year, 2002-3 school year, standing by the pro- more accepting of gay people who are Until reading the script of only six or seven took place at religious duction even amid some eye-rolling and their peers. Nonetheless, in the culture ―Laramie‖ for his audition, though, schools of any faith. As for the tally of grumbling among faculty members and you still see a lot of homophobia and Adam had never even heard of Matthew student productions of ―Grease,‖ how parents and a smattering of picketing from hostility.‖ Shepard. He was in kindergarten, after high can you count?  fundamentalist Christians. Last weekend, Mr. Ostrow‘s cast performed the play three times to a total Gay-friendly Catholic of 470 theatergoers. English and religion teachers gave their students extra credit to Colleges and Universities see ―Laramie‖ and write responses. Par- ents who had initially quailed about their Below is a list of known gay-friendly Catholic colleges and universities, that is, those Catholic children being in the show gave standing institutions that have some type of gay/lesbian student group, support group, ally group, etc. If you are ovations. Spectators bought hundreds of aware of such a college that is known as welcoming to gay/lesbian people, please let us know! ―Erase Hate‖ wristbands to benefit the Matthew Shepard Foundation. Alabama Chestnut Hill: Ohio Nothing happened, which is a way of Mobile: Spring Hill College Chicopee: Elms College Cincinnati: Xavier University Easton: Stonehill College saying that everything happened. To use a Cleveland Heights: John Carroll University California North Andover: Merrimack College Dayton: University of Dayton Sherlock Holmes aphorism, this was the Belmont: Notre Dame de Namur University Weston: Regis College Pepper Pike: Ursuline College case of the dog that did not bark. The deep Goleta: St. Mark‘s University Worcester: Assumption College, South Euclid: Notre Dame College significance of Xavier‘s production of Los Angeles: Loyola Marymount University, College of the Holy Cross Sylvania: Lourdes College ―Laramie‖ — of a Catholic school doing a Mount Saint Mary‘s College play with an H.I.V.-positive, bar-going Moraga: St. Mary‘s College Michigan Oregon Ranchos Palos Verde: Marymount College Detroit: University of Detroit Mercy gay man as the object of the audience‘s Marylhurst: Marylhurst University San Diego: University of San Diego Grand Rapids: Aquinas College Portland: University of Portland empathy — is that it stirred about as much San Francisco: University of San Francisco controversy as, say, ―Our Town.‖ Santa Clara: Santa Clara University Minnesota Pennsylvania ―I‘m thrilled we did it,‖ Jack Ra- Collegeville: St. John‘s University Cresson: Mount Aloysius College slowsky, Xavier‘s president, said in an Colorado Duluth: College of St. Scholastica Dallas: Misericordia University Denver: Regis University Minneapolis: College of St. Catherine interview this week. ―It‘s one of those Erie: Mercyhurst College St. Joseph: College of Saint Benedict Greensburg: Seton Hill University plays that has the potential to be a spring- Connecticut St. Paul: St. Thomas University Philadelphia: Chestnut Hill College, LaSalle board to discussion. If you do ‗The Fairfield: Fairfield University, Winona: St. Mary‘s University of Minnesota University, St. Joseph‘s University Mousetrap‘ or ‗Brigadoon,‘ you‘re not Sacred Heart University Pittsburgh: Carlow University, going to be discussing issues of good and New Haven: Albertus Magnus College Missouri Duquesne University evil.‖ West Hartford: Saint Joseph College Kansas City: Avila University, Radnor: Cabrini College Rockhurst University Such a discussion, said Mr. Ra- Reading: Alvernia University District of Columbia St. Louis: Fontbonne University, Scranton: Marywood University slowsky and Michael LiVigni, the head- Georgetown University, Trinity University St. Louis University Villanova: Villanova University master, fits firmly in the Catholic theo- logical tradition, with its emphases on Montana Rhode Island social justice and human dignity. Miami Gardens: St. Thomas University Helena: Carroll College Newport: Salve Regina University ―When I saw the play,‖ Mr. LiVigni Miami Shores: Barry University Providence: Providence College Nebraska said, ―what struck me most was the scene Hawaii Omaha: Creighton University Texas of Matthew‘s funeral when you have pick- Honolulu: Chaminade University Austin: Saint Edward‘s University eters with the sign ‗God Hates You.‘ But New Hampshire San Antonio: University of the Incarnate Word, why would God hate what he created? Illinois Manchester: St. Anselm College Our Lady of the Lake University That‘s what I want our boys to under- Chicago: DePaul University, Nashua: Rivier College Loyola University, St. Xavier University stand.‖ Vermont Joliet: University of St. Francis New Jersey Colchester: Saint Michael‘s College The Xavier production serves as a River Forest: Dominican University in Illinois Caldwell: Caldwell College kind of marker for all that has and has not Romeoville: Lewis University Jersey City: St. Peter‘s College Washington changed in the dozen years since Mr. South Orange: Seton Hall Lacey: St. Martin‘s College Shepard‘s murder. With Congressional Indiana Seattle: Seattle University efforts to repeal the military‘s ―don‘t ask, Notre Dame: Holy Cross College, St. Mary‘s New York Spokane: Gonzaga University College, University of Notre Dame Albany: College of Saint Rose don‘t tell‖ policy and a federal court case Brooklyn and Patchogue: West Virginia in California framing same-sex marriage Iowa St. Joseph College Wheeling: Wheeling Jesuit University as a civil right, society is moving toward Dubuque: Loras College Bronx: Fordham University, fuller acceptance, if not yet complete Manhattan College Wisconsin equality, for gay citizens. Kentucky Buffalo: Canisius College De Pere: St. Norbert College Yet in the months after Xavier began Louisville: Spalding University, Loudonville: Sienna College Madison: Edgewood College Bellarmine University New Rochelle: College of New Rochelle, work on ―Laramie,‖ a series of young gay Milwaukee: Alverno College, Iona College Cardinal Stritch University, teenagers across the country committed Louisiana Poughkeepsie: Marist College Marquette University suicide to escape harassment, and a gay New Orleans: Loyola University Riverdale: College of Mount St. Vincent man and two teenagers in the Bronx were Rochester: Nazareth College of Rochester, Canada held, beaten and tortured in an incident Maryland St. John Fisher College Toronto: Regis College Baltimore: College of Notre Dame of St. Bonaventure: St. Bonaventure University widely likened to the Shepard killing. Maryland, Loyola College of Maryland Sparkill: St. Thomas Aquinas College The Roman Catholic Church, espe- Syracuse: LeMoyne College cially in the United States, has dealt with Massachusetts Queens: St. John‘s University its own complicated duality on gay issues. Boston: Emmanuel College, Boston College Page 10 BONDINGS Vol. 31. No. 1 Marquette University to offer domestic partner benefits By Sharif Durhams and Don Walker cile that with denying health benefits to a dence, and must be of the same sex. The the decision to rescind the job offer did The Journal-Sentinel couple who have legally registered their declaration of domestic partnership may not have anything to do with O'Brien's Milwaukee commitment to each other," Wild said. In be initiated by an application filed with sexual orientation. March 24, 2011 Latin, cura personalis means "care for the clerk of the county in which an indi- The university has a Statement on the entire person." vidual resides. Human Dignity and Diversity. It reads, Marquette University plans to start Wild noted that the State of Wiscon- The decision by Marquette comes in part, that Marquette "recognizes and offering domestic partner benefits to its sin gives legal recognition both to mar- nearly after a year after the school an- cherishes the dignity of each individual employees in 2012, a move that comes riage for n o u n c e d regardless of age, culture, faith, ethnicity, about a year after the university's deci- heterosexual that it was race, gender, sexual orientation, lan- sion to rescind a job offer to a lesbian couples and rescinding guage, disability or social class." The candidate caused the campus to erupt in to a regis- a job offer statement adds that the Jesuit-run school debate. tered domes- to Jodi seeks to become a more diverse and in- In a statement sent to the campus tic partner- O'Brien, a clusive academic community dedicated Thursday afternoon, Marquette President ship for lesbian and to the promotion of justice. Robert A. Wild said he's been wrestling s a m e - s e x scholar at After Marquette and Wild an- with an idea of offering the benefits that couples. S e a t t l e nounced the decision, dozens of faculty would provide services for gay and les- O f f i - University, members at both Marquette and Seattle bian employees for years. cials said involving condemned Marquette for rescinding the University officials said the timing they're still c o n c e r n s offer to O'Brien to take over as dean of of the announcement was influenced by working out relating to the school's College of Arts and Sci- votes in recent weeks by the University details, but M a r - ences. Academic Senate and the Marquette Uni- m e d i c a l , q u e t t e ' s School officials said at the time that versity Student Government that have dental and "Catholic the university would consider research urged the university to offer benefits for vision bene- m i s s i o n projects, conferences, courses and ser- domestic partners. fits currently offered to married couples and identity" and their incompatibility vice learning projects exploring the top- "If we are truly pastoral in our appli- and their dependents will be extended to with some of O'Brien's scholarly writ- ics of Catholic identity and gender and cation of the Jesuit principle of cura per- registered domestic partners. The couples ings. sexuality issues.  sonalis, I asked myself if I could recon- receiving the benefits must share a resi- The university said at the time that Md.'s top leaders cross Catholic hierarchy on gay marriage

(Continued from page 1) they're going to bury me a Catholic." He ous lawyer, presided over two grueling The state allows residents to petition the Ark of Safety Christian Church of would not say how often he attends years of debate over abortion, siding with that just-passed laws be placed on the Upper Marlboro. He questioned whether church, offering only that "I'm not a guy those who wanted to put protections for ballot if they collect enough signatures. polygamy would one day be acceptable. who makes every Sunday." women into Maryland law in the event If this happened, the marriage law would Sen. Joanne C. Benson (D-Prince Busch said he largely agrees with Roe v. Wade was repealed. appear on the November 2012 ballot. George's) said she grew up watching her the church on issues such as supporting Miller said his mother told him that O'Malley grew up in a Catholic fam- father officiate over weddings and came the poor and expanding access to health "it was a women's issue and that I needed ily in Montgomery County, attending to believe that such unions should be care. He has parted ways on others, in- to support the women." Our Lady of Lourdes in Bethesda and reserved for people who can have chil- cluding abortion and embryonic stem- Miller has since been a strong advo- Gonzaga College High School in the dren. cell research funding, which Maryland cate on some issues affecting the Catho- District, a Jesuit school. He later went to "Two people of the same sex cannot lawmakers approved in 2006. lic Church, including a proposed tax Catholic University in the District. produce children," she said. "I don't think I'm unlike a lot of credit to help bolster its schools. But he The governor listed a variety of is- With attention turning to the House, other members of the Catholic religion," said he's "not a very good Catholic" de- sues for which his Catholic faith pro- supporters there acknowledged Thursday Busch said. spite regular attendance at churches in vides an underpinning. Among them: that same-sex marriage has been a hard In wrestling with the same-sex mar- his district. opposition to the death penalty, raising sell with African American lawmakers riage issue, he said he has asked himself "I think we should have women for the minimum wage, holding down the from Prince George's County, as well as how he would respond if one of his priests," he said. "I think there should be cost of college tuition, supporting the conservative Democrats from Southern daughters told him she was a lesbian. contraception to stop the spread of AIDs right of workers to organize and cleaning Maryland and the Baltimore suburbs. "Do you love them any less? You love in Africa. I support capital punishment, up the environment. In an interview this week, Busch them the same. You want the best for and I'm pro-choice in the early stages of O'Malley, 48, said he has come to said he will support the bill as a matter of them." pregnancy." view gay nuptials as a matter of "equal civil rights, even though he prefers civil Masses were said in Latin when In discussing his opposition to same- protection under the law." It is one of unions for gay couples. several issues in which he is not "in Busch, 64, said he has reservations Maryland tables marriage bill until 2012 sync" with the Catholic hierarchy. about the term "marriage" but has not "Their job is to guard the tenets of been swayed by Catholic officials' argu- ANNAPOLIS, Md. -- After two weeks of tension and occasional high the faith, and, you know, it's understand- ments that it should be reserved for peo- drama, the Maryland House of Delegates delayed a showdown on same-sex mar- able that the church, for that reason, that ple with the potential for procreation. He riage until next year. they're slow to change," he said. said he does not fear any retribution from The House decided March 11 to return a controversial bill to legalize same- O'Malley said he settled on civil the church. sex marriage to its Judiciary Committee -- a move that effectively tables it for the unions several years ago, when he was "I believe God wants me to make remainder of this year‘s legislative session but keeps it alive for when the Legis- mayor of Baltimore, as a reasonable just and right decisions," Busch said. lature reconvenes next January. —ncronline.org, March 15, 2011 compromise between freedom of religion After his family bounced between and equal rights sought by gay couples. Maryland and Virginia, Busch spent his Miller, the oldest of 10 children, was an sex marriage, Miller, 68, pointed to the It is a compromise that has since been final years of high school at St. Mary's, a altar boy at St. John's Church in Clinton. strong values of his family, which hadn't rejected by leading gay-rights advocates Catholic school in Annapolis serving He said that his father was "a very con- had a single divorce until his generation. in Maryland, who see civil unions as mostly blue-collar families at the time. servative Catholic" and that his mother "It's not really a Catholic thing," he second-class treatment. Busch credits the nuns there with converted to Catholicism from the Meth- said. "I have a hard time associating fam- "The debate seems to have evolved putting him on the right path and instill- odist Church. ily values with people of the same sex more quickly than many might have ing "a value system of honesty, integrity, Despite their Catholicism, Miller being married. What is the next defini- foreseen," the governor said. "I'd be will- hard work and discipline." He returned to points to his parents to explain one of his tion of marriage going to be? At some ing to sign any law that reaches me as St. Mary's for much of the 1970s as a first high-profile breaks with the church point, you have to draw the line." long as it protects rights equally. I'm not history teacher and football coach. during his 25-year tenure as Senate presi- Miller said he thinks same-sex mar- going to get hung up on the words used Busch said he considers himself dent. riage could be rejected by Maryland vot- to describe equal protection under the Catholic, adding that "one day I hope In the early 1990s, Miller, a gregari- ers. law."  New Ways Ministry discusses gay marriage during conference

(Continued from page 1) handed out by the church and there is a followed by roundtable discussions at the "There have been a lot of bumps on me," she recalled. "Over time and many crisis in the church. We must stay and conclusion of the delegate's remarks. the way, but in the long run, truth will conversations, he came back to me and fight," she said. "This is a civil rights Virginia Rugemer asked, "If gays and come out and justice will prevail," said apologized. issue. There is a choice between love and lesbians are accepted by my family, why Gramick, who is a member of the Sisters Mizeur said her priest friend said, fear. Fear goes away when you pound it not society?" while Carol Rice said, "I'm of Loretto. "And it's because of church "'You have come into my life and you with love." a Catholic, and no one is going to steal governance that it's been so long in com- have made me a better priest.'" "It's so rare for a politician to speak my church." ing. … Let the people's voice come She spoke of people's fear of change and so deeply of their personal faith," said Many attending the event blamed the through." the importance of keeping or bringing Francis DeBernardo executive director at church's hierarchy for its stance on same- Gramick's work has not always en- back to the church "our gay brothers and Mount Rainier, Prince George's County, sex marriage. deared her to church authorities. sisters." New Ways Ministry, which was co- Gramick, who has been assigned to a "I was warned back in the 1990s by the She pointed out that the Roman founded in 1977 by the Rev. Robert Nu- pastoral ministry for gay and lesbian Vatican that I should not be involved in Catholic Church has been slow to move gent, a Roman Catholic priest, and Sister Catholics for the past 20 years, is hopeful this ministry," she said.  on this issue. Jeannine Gramick. that same-sex marriage will become law "Much pain and suffering has been A question-and-answer session was in Maryland. Spring 2011 BONDINGS Page 11

Gay-friendly Catholic Parishes Below is a partial list of known ―gay-friendly‖ Catholic parishes. Thank you for helping us add to this growing list! If you are aware of such a parish that is known as welcoming to lesbian/gay Catholics as members and active parishioners, please let us know. Tell us if this welcome is because of a support program, spirituality group, mission statement, participation in gay community events, or involvement with parents.

Fort Collins: Blessed John XXIII Kalamazoo: Lambda Catholics University Heights: Church of the Genessee: St. Frances Cabrini Shrine St. Ignace: St. Ignatius Loyola Gesu Highlands Ranch: Pax Christi Westland: Ss. Simon and Jude Westlake: St. Ladislas Littleton: Light of the World, St Frances Wooster: St. Mary of the Immaculate Cabrini Minnesota Conception Alabama Minneapolis: St. Frances Cabrini, Oregon Montgomery: St. Bede Connecticut St. Joan of Arc Beaverton: Mission of the Atonement Hartford: St. Patrick-St. Anthony Portland: Journey and Koinonia Arizona Missouri Catholic Community, St. Andrew, Mesa: Christ the King Delaware Kansas City: Guardian Angels, St. Phillip Neri, Downtown Chapel (St. Scottsdale: Franciscan Renewal North Wilmington: Holy Child St. Francis Xavier, St. James Vincent de Paul) Center Wilmington: St. Joseph St. Joseph: St. Francis Xavier Tucson: St. Cyril of Alexandria, St. Louis: St. Cronan, St. Margaret of Pennsylvania SS. Peter and Paul, St. Pius X, District of Columbia Scotland, St. Pius V Huntingdon: Most Holy Trinity Our Mother of Sorrows, St. Odilia Holy Trinity, St. Aloysius, Philadelphia: Old St. Joseph, St. Matthew Cathedral Montana Old St. Mary, St. John the California Billings: Holy Rosary, St. Pius X Evangelist, St. Vincent DePaul Berkeley: Holy Spirit Parish Florida Burney: St Francis of Assisi Cocoa Beach: Our Savior Nebraska Rhode Island Carlsbad: St. Patrick Daytona Beach: Our Lady of Lourdes Omaha: Holy Family, Sacred Heart Providence: St. Francis Chapel, Claremont: Our Lady of the Ft. Lauderdale: St. Anthony, St. Mary‘s Assumption St. Maurice Nevada Wickford: St. Bernard El Cajon: St. Luke Naples: St. John the Evangelist Las Vegas: Christ the King, Encino: Our Lady of Grace St. Petersburg: Holy Cross Guardian Angel Cathedral Tennessee Escondido: St. Timothy Tampa: Franciscan Center, Memphis: Cathedral of the Fremont: St. Joseph - Mission San Sacred Heart, Christ the King New Hampshire Immaculate Conception Jose Merrimack: St. John Neumann Goleta: St. Mark Univ. Parish Georgia Pelham: St. Patrick Texas Hawthorne: St. Joseph (Spanish) Atlanta: Shrine of the Immaculate Colleyville: Good Shepherd Hayward: All Saints Conception New Jersey Dallas: Holy Trinity LaPuente: St. Martha Lawrenceville: St. Ann El Paso: All Saints Lemon Grove: St. John of the Cross Illinois Long Beach Island: St. Francis of Houston: St. Anne Long Beach: St. Matthew Berwyn: St. Mary of the Celle Assisi Plano: St. Elizabeth Ann Seton Los Angeles: Blessed Sacrament, Chicago: Immaculate Conception, Maplewood: St. Joseph Christ the King, Mother of Good St. Clement, St. Gertrude, Trenton Falls: St. Anselm Virginia Counsel, St. Camillus Center-LA St. Gregory, St. Peter, St. Sylvester, Arlington: Our Lady Queen of Peace USC Medical Center (Spanish), St. Teresa of Avila, St. Thomas the New Mexico Richmond: Cathedral of the Sacred St. Agatha, St. Paul the Apostle Apostle, Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, Albuquerque: Holy Family, Heart, Sacred Heart Parish North Hollywood: Blessed Old St. Patrick Shrine of St. Bernadette Roanoke: St. Gerard Sacrament, Clarendon Hills: Notre Dame Espanola: Sacred Heart of Jesus Triangle: St. Francis St. Jane Frances de Chantal, Country Club Hills: St. Emeric Virginia Beach: St. Nicholas St. Patrick Evanston: St. Nicholas New York Oakland: Our Lady of Lourdes Johnston City: St. Paul Albany: St. Vincent DePaul Washington Oceanside: St. Thomas More Morton Grove: St. Martha Baldwinsville: St. Augustine Pullman: Sacred Heart Orange: Holy Family Cathedral, Oak Park: Ascension, St. Catherine of Bellmore: St. Barnabas the Apostle Seattle: St. Benedict, Prince of Peace Koinoia Sienna-St. Lucy Bellport: Mary Immaculate Newman Center Pleasanton: Catholic Community of Schaumburg: St. Marcelline Brooklyn: St. Andrew the Apostle, Tacoma: St. Leo Pleasanton St. Boniface, St. Athanasius, Ross: St. Anselm Indiana St. Augustine, Immaculate Heart of Wisconsin Sacramento: St. Francis of Assisi Evansville: St. Mary Mary Madison: Our Lady Queen of Peace, San Carlos: St. Charles Indianapolis: St. Thomas Aquinas Deer Park: Ss. 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Simi Valley: St. Rose of Lima Baltimore: Corpus Christi, Wantaugh: St. Frances de Chantal Spring Valley: Santa Sophia St. Francis of Assisi, Westbury: St. Brigid Stanford: Catholic Community at Stanford St. Matthew, St. Vincent dePaul University Columbia: St. John the Evangelist North Carolina Valinda: St. Martha Gaithersburg: St. Rose of Lima Charlotte: St. Peter Vernon: Holy Angels Church of Hagerstown: St. Ann Durham: Immaculate Conception the Deaf Severn: St. Bernadette Fayetteville: St. Patrick Walnut Creek: St. John Vianney Raleigh: St. Francis of Assisi West Hollywood: St. Ambrose, Massachusetts St. Victor Boston: Paulist Center, St. Anthony Ohio Whittier: St. Mary of the Assumption Shrine, St. Cecilia Akron: St. Bernard East Longmeadow: St. Michael Cincinnati: St. George-St. Monica, Colorado Newton: St. Ignatius St. Robert Bellarmine Arvada: Spirit of Christ Sharon: Our Lady of Sorrows Cleveland: Ascension of Our Lord, Avon: St. Edward Springfield: Sacred Heart St. Malachi, St. Martha Colorado Springs: Our Lady of Worcester: Holy Cross College Columbus: St. Thomas More Guadalupe, Sacred Heart Newman Center Denver: St. Dominic, Christ the King, Michigan Mentor: St. John Vianney Mount Carmel Ann Arbor: St. Mary Student Parish Detroit: St. Leo, Christ the King Page 12 BONDINGS Vol. 31, No. 1 Bishop Tobin: Church OK with Some Benefits for Gay Couples

By Stephen Beale church is as steadfastly opposed to civil gay marriage. they‘re married then, in a way, that di- GoLocalProv.com unions as it is to gay marriage. ―We think it is an ill-advised attempt minishes that special relationship the April 12, 2011 ―We would oppose what is com- to redefine the very basic parameters of married couple does have.‖ monly called civil unions because it‘s marriage as they‘ve existed from the ―I call it the 'champagne principle,'‖ In an exclusive interview, Roman really just another name for what would very beginning of mankind—as the un- he added. ―Champagne has a very special Catholic Bishop Thomas Tobin said the be same-sex marriage,‖ Tobin said. ion of one man and one woman designed definition before it can bottled, labeled, Church is not opposed to granting some ―We‘ve found invariably whenever civil to create new life and to encourage the and sold as such. If somebody comes benefits and rights to gay couples—as unions are introduced in a state that is love of the spouses,‖ Tobin said. along with sparkling water and labels it long as the term marriage is not used. quickly followed by full-fledged gay He also said the state should not be 'champagne,' they‘ll say, ‗What harm is His statement—which was couched marriage.‖ sanctioning behavior the Church regards it?‘ … ‗We call it champagne, you call it in caveats—nonetheless indicates a flexi- Four months into the legislative ses- champagne, what‘s the difference?‘ bility in the Church‘s position that has sion, the Catholic Church in Rhode Is- Well, there is a difference and you are previously been overlooked in the polar- land has been hard at work making its advocating a name that belongs to some- izing debate over gay marriage in Rhode case for the one man-one woman defini- body else.‖ Island. tion of marriage. Tobin said he person- Tobin steered clear of the debate ―The legislation we would support is ally had reached out to about 10 or 12 over whether homosexuality is genetic or what is often called ‗reciprocal bene- lawmakers through personal letters and acquired—saying it‘s an open question fits,‘‖ Tobin told GoLocalProv. ―It does telephone conversations. that has yet to be decided by scientists not use marriage as a reference point. It When it comes to another hot-button and philosophers. But even if someone‘s would grant some legal benefits [and] social issue, such as abortion, the conse- homosexuality is genetically predis- some legal rights to two people who have quences of voting against the Church's posed, he said that wouldn‘t affect the some kind of established relationship views can be serious. In 2004, then- Church‘s position. without any particular reference to mar- Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger—the future ―The question whether or not some riage. So it could be someone and their Pope Benedict XVI—said American people are made that way—I think that‘s grandfather. Could be two cousins. politicians who support abortion should still an open question. I‘m not quite Could be two elderly sisters.‖ be denied communion. Five years later, ready to cede that. But even if that is the Such a bill was filed in the House in Tobin himself became caught up in a case, that someone has that disposition, early March. The bill, sponsored by Rep high-profile controversy when he told Bishop Thomas Tobin they still have the ability as human be- Peter Petrarca, D- Lincoln, would grant then-Congressman Patrick Kennedy that ings to control their behavior—otherwise about half a dozen rights and benefits to he should not be receiving communion as immoral and expressed concern that there‘s anarchy and chaos,‖ Tobin said. any two unmarried people, regardless of because of his position on abortion. that a gay-marriage law could limit reli- He said resisting impulses is part of sexual orientation. If passed, it would When it comes to gay marriage, gious freedom. Even though the bill does the dignity of being a human being. allow one partner to make medical deci- Tobin said Catholic legislators who votes not mandate that any church or other And, he pointed out that the Catholic sions for another, have a say over the in favor of it could be committing a religious community perform gay mar- Church teaches that heterosexual couples burial and disposition of their remains, sin—unless they are truly voting their riages, Tobin said it could still force reli- also have to control their behavior. Adul- and the right to inherit property if the conscience. gious groups to grant benefits to gay tery and pre-marital sex, for example, are other partner dies. ―Is it a sin for someone to vote for couples. activities that are considered immoral Tobin declined to elaborate on ex- gay marriage? It could be but it is not Tobin conceded that allowing gay regardless of sexual orientation. actly which legal benefits and rights he necessarily so,‖ Tobin said. ―Because if marriage would not necessarily have a ―The fact that a person is made a thought unmarried couples should they really believe in their conscience direct impact on marriages between certain way is not immoral—again that‘s have—saying that‘s a question for legal that they‘re doing the right thing, then straight couples. the difference between orientation and experts. ―People deserve human rights that removes them from any subjective ―There may not be a direct harm,‖ activity,‖ Tobin said. ―Having a homo- whether or not they‘re gay,‖ Tobin said. guilt of sin. But if the lawmaker knows Tobin said. ―What your neighbor [is] sexual orientation is no more or less im- ―Now the reciprocal benefits [bill] recog- that it‘s wrong and he or she votes for it doing next door might not affect you moral than having a heterosexual orienta- nizes some rights and some privileges anyhow, then that‘s a problem for their directly but, again, if a husband and tion. But, in both cases, whether it‘s het- irrespective of their orientation and that‘s conscience—Why would they go against wife—male and female—were married, erosexual or homosexual, we have to be the key I think.‖ their conscience?‖ their marriage means something in par- able to control our behavior.‖  Tobin said he would not go as far as Tobin went into detail about the ticular. If two other people come along supporting civil unions, saying the objections the Catholic Church has over who don‘t meet that definition and claim Catholic Groups Convene Capitol Hill Briefing on LGBT Rights WASHINGTON, DC— In an his- LGBT community within our own fami- Christians and the public,‖ said Dr. them to work and contribute to society toric convening on Capitol Hill today, lies and parishes?‖ Robert P. Jones, CEO of Public Religion without prejudice and discrimination.‖ prominent Catholics and a leading re- The Public Religion Research Insti- Research Institute. ―This support may ―We as Catholics know that justice searcher discussed the strong support for tute‘s recently released report, Catholic come as a surprise to many.‖ is grounded in truth and love. It is this lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender Attitudes on Gay and Lesbian Issues: A Catholics account for approximately combination that leads us to struggle (LGBT) individuals among Catholic la- Comprehensive Portrait from Recent one-quarter of the U.S. population, and against injustice and discrimination ity. The event was organized to raise Research, found their attitudes have wherever it occurs. We have been shaped awareness among policymakers as they that the majority basically tracked the by the pastoral statements of our church consider legislation that impacts the of the sixty-four general population including the Bishops statement in 1997 LGBT community by Equally Blessed, a million Catholics shift toward a more that encouraged us to reach out to lesbian coalition of Roman Catholic organiza- in the United LGBT-friendly main- and gay persons and welcome them into tions that supports LGBT equality, and States support a stream America, as our Christian Community. This experi- supported by the Arcus Foundation. number of public demonstrated by the ence of sharing in communities of faith The event was hosted by Represen- policies that ex- recent statutory repeal leads us to know their very real struggles tative Joseph Crowley (D-NY). Invited tend rights to gay of ―Don‘t Ask, Don‘t against discrimination. We cannot stand panelist Robert P. Jones, Ph.D., CEO of men, lesbians, and Tell‖ and other by and watch. Our faith calls us to de- Public Religion Research Institute, de- their families. The changes in public fend their rights and, as stated in The scribed results from recently released report also shows policies. Millions of Pastoral Care of Homosexual Persons, research showing strong support for gay that 73 percent Catholic voices may 1986, no. 10, ‗strive to eliminate any and lesbian rights among Catholics favor laws that be inspired by Catho- forms of injustice, oppression, or vio- across a range of issues. Catholic panel- protect gay and lic teachings which lence against them,‘‖ said Sister Simone ists included Reverend Bryan Massingale lesbian people have compelled and Campbell, SSS. S.T.D., Professor of Theology, Mar- from workplace informed countless "Because we are all God's children, I quette University; Sister Simone Camp- discrimination, social justice move- believe we are entitled to love and to be bell, SSS, Executive Director, NET- and 74 percent of ments. According to loved; to equality and respect regardless WORK; and David Saavedra, Board Co- Catholics believe Reverend Bryan of our gender or sexual orientation," said President, Call To Action. The briefing that gay and les- Massingale, promot- David Saavedra, Board Co-President, was moderated by Sister Maureen Fied- bian relationships ing social justice is an Call To Action, an Equally Blessed part- ler, SL, host of the radio program, Inter- should be accepted by society. On the intrinsically Catholic principle. ner. faith Voices. legal recognition of same sex relation- ―Every Catholic document on social ―Equally Blessed endeavors to re- ―The distinguished voices we heard ships, Catholics are more supportive than justice declares the equal human dignity mind the public about the reality of today confirm that there is a growing any other Christian tradition and Ameri- of every human being,‖ said Rev. Bryan Catholic public opinion, and to contrib- base of faithful Catholics who are willing cans overall—nearly three-quarters of Massingale. ―Many Catholics – including ute supportive Catholic voices to the to stand for justice for LGBT people,‖ Catholics favor either marriage or civil some who agree with their Church‘s discourse on this critical topic of equal- stated Francis DeBernardo, Executive unions. moral judgments about same-sex conduct ity,‖ said Marianne Duddy-Burke, Ex- Director of New Ways Ministry, an ―While there are significant differ- – support legislation that would ensure ecutive Director of DignityUSA, another Equally Blessed partner. ―Catholic teach- ences between the 38% of Catholics who that gay and lesbian persons have the Equally Blessed partner. ―This briefing ings insist on the unconditional love for attend church at least once a week and right to visit sick loved ones and make helps set the framework for more visible our brothers and sisters. How can we the majority of Catholics who attend less decisions concerning their care; that Catholic involvement in LGBT advo- expect the attitude toward LGBT people frequently, rank and file Catholics as a would ensure that such students can at- cacy.‖  to be exempt from these principles, espe- whole are generally more supportive of tend school without the burden of harass- cially when many count members of the rights for gays and lesbians than other ment and violence; that would enable (See page 3 for related stories.)