In This Issue: Mike Edison Frederica Fray Hyena Hell W. Joe Hoppe John Morton Christopher Schipper Kelly Shriver DID YOU KNOW... That wealthly white women are now SECRETLY BUTCHERING AND EATING PANDAS as part of a SATANIC RITUAL promising ETERNAL BEAUTY?? Only OBSOLETE! Magazine covers the stories that really matter. Unencumbered by corporate media dollars, journalistic standards or so- called “facts”, you can count on the team at OBSOLETE! to deliver the stories to you quickly, when you need them most- four times a year (more or less). Why not show your support for publishing excellence by subscribing, donating or buying OBSOLETE! swag? Your money goes toward keeping the underground newspaper alive. Although most of it goes to the dying beast known as the United States Post Office, a portion actually trick- les down to the poor saps who contribute their WRITING and ART to this rag. Please Visit: They don’t even understand obsoletemag.blogspot.com/ what is about to happen to to contribute using paypal or them. Poor stupid things. send cash or checks to: OBSOLETE!, PO Box 72, Victor, IA, 52347 We now accept Bitcoin! email us at: [email protected] for details. Only your hard-earned cash can keep OBSOLETE! (and these PANDAS) ALIVE!!! Library, and aspires to be an archivist or rare books librarian. She lives in Bed-Stuy, Brooklyn, with her husband and four cats. Contributors John Morton was born in Cleveland Ohio sometime. He started the nascent [proto][proto] punk band the electric eels in 1972. As a visual artist Morton has exhib- Tim Beckett has been caught up for far too long writing a novel about his home- ited world wide including Havana Cuba and MOMA in NYC. His current band is the town, Uranium City, a near ghost town in Northern Canada. He has received a couple “Dunking Swine of Chelsea.” of writing grants from the Canada Council and would dearly love a couple more. He is editor and contributor for Sensitive Skin Magazine. He is currently hiding out in Chris Schipper is a godless heathen living in deeply conservative Jeeeeeezus land, Brooklyn. More of his writing can be seen at http://www.tim-beckett.com. in the geographically stunning Four Corners region of New Mexico, where some of the more visible residents are gun nuts who drive massive monster truck vehicles. Mike Edison is a New York-based writer, editor, musician, and spoken word artist. Chris was born and raised in Eastern Iowa, and counts Cedar Rapids and Iowa City He was the publisher of marijuana counterculture magazine High Times, and was among his past homes. Chris moved to NM in 2006 with his partner of then nine later named editor-in-chief of Screw, the self-proclaimed “World’s Greatest News- years, and with Emma the cat. In 2009, he and partner traveled back to progressive paper.” In his memoir I Have Fun Everywhere I Go, Edison recounts his adventures Iowa to be married (Emma stayed in NM). The couple now also shares their home across twenty years of druggy adventurism and his parallel careers as a magazine with kitties Buster, and Max. Chris is the director of the library at San Juan College editor, writer, and musician. His new book, Dirty! Dirty! Dirty!: Of Playboys, Pigs, and – a position he’s officially held for more than a year. Chris enjoys hiking, photography, Penthouse Paupers, An American Tale of Sex and Wonder will be published Fall 2011 gardening, and frequent trips to also enjoy more urban amenities. by Soft Skull Press. Kelly Shriver lives in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. Her short fiction has appeared online in Frederica Fray, Anti-Christ guru, fashions herself in Iowa as a college philosophy McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, Pindeldyboz, Juked, and 3:AM Magazine. She also professor, (specialty: philosophy of mind/brain), and believes she is descendant of co-edits Bound Off, a monthly literary audio magazine available for free at boundoff. the one, the only, true human, viz., Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche— the only delusion com and iTunes. Read more of her stories at kellyshriver.com. she’ll ascribe. When she’s not screaming, “The robots are coming! The robots are coming!!” she’s probably yelling “GOD IS DEAD!” as she drives by you, or making some kind of movie to expose the follies of magical thinking. She can be found sitting The OBSOLETE! Team is: on her couch, all over YouTube and somewhere on Facebook. Otherwise, she doesn’t exist. Rich Dana: Editor, publisher, anarcho-syndicalist scout master W. Joe Hoppe grew up the rust belt city of Jackson, Michigan but has lived in Aus- Ericka Wildgirl Dana: Photographer, human spell-check and feral cat wrangler tin, TX for the last twenty years with artist Polly Monear and their son Max. He has published one book-length collection of poetry, Galvanized ((www.daltonpublishing. Blair Gauntt: Art Director, illustrator, resident Charlie Callas scholar com). Along with teaching English and Creative Writing at Austin Community College, he enjoys writing and wrenching on old Mopars. Eric Houts: Contributing editor, punctuation czar, indispensable niggler Hyena Hell is a printmaker, illustrator and comic book artist currently residing in the capitol of self destruction, geographically located in New Orleans. She is currently imprisoned as a paper mache artist in a giant sweat shop making Mardi Gras floats. In her spare time she enjoys chasing people out of bars with her obnoxious juke box selections, drunkenly wrecking her bike, and yelling belligerently at inanimate objects. She can be tracked down on facebook, where you might work out a deal to Contact: purchase some of her snake oil. OBSOLETE!, PO Box 72, Charlotte T. Jackson is a writer of literary non-fiction, poetry, opera libretti, and miscellaneous scribblings. Her work has appeared in the Raleigh News and Observer Victor, IA, 52347 and the City of Strangers blog, and will soon appear in Sensitive Skin Magazine. She crafted the libretto for the contemporary opera The Rat Land, by composer Gordon [email protected] Beeferman, which will be performed in L.A. in 2013; scenes from their upcoming burlesque opera revue, The Enchanted Organ, will be workshopped this winter in New York at Dixon Place. In addition to writing, Ms. Jackson works at the Brooklyn College OBmag no. 4 The Senihilism issue Senile: /see-nahy-ul/ Having or showing the weaknesses or diseases of old age, esp. a loss of mental faculties. Nihilism: /nahy-uh-liz-uhm/ 1. total rejection of established laws and institutions. 2. anarchy, terrorism, or other revolutionary activity. Here’s how it went down. Political unrest in the Middle East drove up fuel prices and the cost of living. A protracted war against a seemingly undefeatable indigenous guerilla force sucked the national coffers dry. A gutless democrat president was steamrolled by corporatist republicans and downturns in housing and manufacturing dragged the economy into recession and sent unemployment to record highs. And Ronald Reagan was elected President. It was in that atmosphere of post-Vietnam imperial decline that punk came of age. Nihilism was the message. The government and society had sold out the American people. Older hip- pies were well down the path toward yuppiedom, so punks chose to start their own alterna- tive culture. Punk was based not on the collectivist optimism of the psychedelic generation, but more on a vision of a DIY culture rising from the ashes of mundane mainsteam middle- America. Punk bands booked their own tours, pressed their own records, designed their own flyers. Punk artists took to the streets or started their own galleries. Punk writers published their own ‘zines. A subculture grew and punks flourished, without the permission of the growing corporatocracy. Punk was the last best hope for a life outside the establishment system. In the 90’s, many punks, now in their 30’s, sadly but not unexpectedly took the opportunity to sneak back into the middle class from whence they came. The Clintonian neo-liberal tech- boom train was leaving the station, and “alternative” college rock enthusiasts rushed to get on board, following their hippie elders into the world of khaki pants and retirement accounts. The new breed of assembly line worker was being born. Not on the factory floor- oh no, President Clinton made sure that those jobs went overseas- but rather in the climate con- trolled cubicles of the former punk outposts like San Francisco, Seattle and Lower Manhat- tan. But this assembly line is better! You could listen to your favorite punk tunes (through headphones), wear your Chuck Taylor Allstars (to signify that you are “thinking outside of the box”) AND the cafeteria has organic and vegetarian options! Ex-punks had babies, and brought children into a future that just a few years before they Now, in the era of “austerity,” jobs are scarce and the establishment is once again selling out thought would not exist. Back then, they were thrashing in a pit while the Circle Jerks sang the American people. But this time there is no youth movement in sight. Surveillance society “ I went to see a rabbi, but despite his advise, I want an operation I will not father life! and digital culture has apparently stolen the punk babies souls. They need to be shown the Operation, operation, snip & tie, snip & tie!” Suddenly they are getting their musical cues way. They can’t learn it all from reading Maximum Rock and Roll, after all. It’s time for old from the bumper music on “All Things Considered” while they haul a van full of brats with punks to rediscover their roots. To re-activate.