Sel and Self-Discipline

’ SEL AN D SELF- DISC IPLIN E B W . MA TURI . N FO RM RL ' O F E C OW E . o H D L ' ST j N . O'FO R N E W IM PRESSIOIV L O N G M A N S G E E A N D , R N , C O . 39 PATERNOSTER ROW, LONDO N NEW YORK, BOMBAY, AND CALCUTTA I 9O 9 gumm m ERTU U H ERB S S. TH RSTON , I. G ULIELM US PRE POS IT US O 'OHNS N . A a W zsr u ON sr , die 28 Oct, 1905. l r i er These thr ee aone lead life to sove e gn pow . o come ncae for but to ve law W uld u ll d ) , li by , ctin l v t t f A g the aw we li e by wi h ou ear . —(E NON E . PRINCIPLE OF SELF- DI SCIPLINE T HE SEAT OF THE CONFLICT THE DI SCIPLINE OF THE WILL THE DI SCIPLINE OF THE M IN D T HE DISCIPLINE OF THE AFFECTIONS THE DI SCIPLINE OF THE BO D' M O RTIFICATION AN D THE SU PE RNATU RAL LIFE T HE LAW A PREPA RATION FO R THE REV ELATION S E L F - 'N OW L E DG E . - S ELF KNOWLEDGE. THERE are two Spheres of knowledge in which every one who is endeavouring after any growth in the spiritual life must be making some advance . The of of knowledge God and the knowledge self. We can all readily perceive the necessity of growth in the knowledge of God as essential to any develop of ment the spiritual life . The connection is obvious . “ ' “ our This, said Lord , is life eternal , that they might know Thee, the only true God , and Jesus Christ Whom ' ab Thou hast sent . A certain moral sympathy is so lutel of y necessary as a condition friendship , and holi ness consists in friendship with God . If we would be in any sense the friends of God , we must have at least that desire for holiness without which such friendship o f would be impossible , the growth in the knowledge “ of h God is the deepening t is friendship . If we say that we have fellowship with Him and walk in dark ' ness , we lie and do not the truth. 4 SELF - KNOWLEDGE AND SELF - DISCIPLINE B ut the knowledge of self is as necessary for the of Spiritual life as is the knowledge God . It is at once a condition and an effect of this knowledge . The more we grow in the knowledge of God the deeper our knowledge of self, and if we would attain to any knowledge of God there must be some know ’ of saw ledge self. When Isaias the Lord s Glory in the Temple there was at once a deepening sense of “ his own sinfulness , Woe is me , because I am a man of unclean lips , and I have seen with my eyes the ' King , the Lord of hosts . For the soul is created in the I mage of God , and it cannot approach His Presence without perceiving how unlike it is to Him in whose I mage it was made . To know God is to of G od t know self. To have no knowledge is o wal k in darkness , to have no absolute standard by which to gauge and measure oneself. Those who shut God altogether out of their lives are able to live in stupid if Of not happy ignorance what a failure their lives are . r And yet there are few things more surp ising, when of e we come to think it , than our ignorance of ourselv s, for nay, more than ignorance, ignorance only means for failure in knowledge , but we go beyond that, we SELF- KNOWLEDGE 5 us of are, many of , not only ignorant a great part of our own character, but we Often imagine ourselves to be quite different from what we are . It seems almost so not impossible that it should be , did we know it to be only too true . How is it possible for a man to close his eyes to the a most p tent and pressing facts connected with himself, involving the gravest consequences , which are perfectly evident to every one except himself' We are Often amused by hearing others giving their opinion of themselves and their gifts and powers . We are so amused , sometimes amazed , that their estimate is utterly different from what those who have but a very slight knowledge of them can see at a glance to be ne the true o . We hear people boast Of gifts that one every except themselves know they do not possess , or on the other hand men of great powers and infl u ence tormented with an almost morbidly low estimate of their capacity . And yet we do not consider that perhaps we too are as completely mistaken in our m of judg ent of ourselves . Most us have known in some time of our lives what it was to be accused of some fault in our character which we repudiated at 6 SELF - KNOWLEDGE AND SELF- DISCIPLINE the time with indignation begotten of the sincere con i ion v ct that the accusation was untrue, and yet perhaps years afterwards we found ourselves mistaken and that the criticism was correct . How is it possible that such a thing should be ' Listen to two friends discussing and criticising one another , what is more common than the tone of protest or repudiation with which or some fault some virtue is discussed , and yet do we “ not feel naturally inclined to say , Surely the man m ust know himself better than his friend can know ’ him , if he says he hasn t that gift or fault who can know whether he has or not better than himself P' We do not say this because experience has proved to us how Often the critic is right and that in many cases a man is the worst j udge of himself. Indeed o ne may have a very deep knowledge of human character in general , and yet be profoundly ’ ignorant of one s own character . We look with the the so t same eyes , yet eyes that pierce easily hrough the artifi ces and deceptions of others become clouded and the vision disturbed when they turn inwards and ex amine oneself. And moreover it is to be remem bered that self- knowledge has nothing to do with SELF- KNOWLEDGE 7 mere cleverness or intellectual insight , but is largely if not entirely moral . When we consider how intensely self- conscious is the age in which we live , and the amount of time that most peo ple spend upon themselves one way or an an is other, what absorbingly interesting study that of the human heart, and all the more interesting when it ’ is one s own , we are amazed that we are, nevertheless, - most Of us , so lacking in self knowledge, that very often our latest acquaintance could tell us things to about ourselves that we should refuse believe, yet that are undoubtedly true . No sooner do we become thoughtful and begin to pray and try to get near God than all this comes o of up n us with an overwhelming sense incapacity . How are we to advance 'what are we to struggle with Deep shadows are seen to lie across the soul but we cannot tell what casts them . We feel held back from God but we cannot grasp and bring to light what it is us . that holds back We know well , indeed , some one ’ or two prominent sins which have dogged our life s path for years , and against these we struggle bravely — and are conscious that God is helping us but of these 8 SELF- KNOWLEDG E AND SELF - DISCIPLINE we are now scarcely afraid , such faults are visible, tangible, in a sense healthy, inasmuch as they can be met and fought face to face, but it is the unseen , the impalpable, the mysterious , that paralyses even now the strongest men , and to these the soul has awakened . There are ghostly fears that flit about the u background of the soul , stirring p evil , suggesting all kinds of doubts and fears . We hear the silent foot f steps o unseen foes hurrying hither and thither . We find ourselves at times excited by an unreasonable an taonism to our g the God , Whom , with all reason and our all hearts , we long to cling to and to serve . At i other t mes the heart is wrung dry of every emotion , every serious thought is ch ased from the brain , till kneeling before God with silent lips and dull vacant mind we feel almost hopeless . If I only knew what see it is that holds me back , if I could only the enemy I should not fear to fight him , but I now begin to realise that there is a life within of which I know nothing , that my mind has formed , habits have grown , and strangers have entered and taken possession of my heart and I know them not, neither their nature nor their name . SELF - KNOWLEDGE 9 The soul on awakening to God wakens to the sense o of its ignorance of itself, and the imp ssibility of - making any decided advance without self knowledge . It is at such moments haunted with the thought of the of possibility having been insincere in confession , or sin to that there is some unforgiven binding it earth, or at others it fears delusion , fears that it has never really repented and that the prayers and Communions that seemed earnest were the mere result of emotional .

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