Seduction at the Boundary of Horror
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“Like a Porn Movie” Notes on Boundaries and Bodies That Matter in Male Sex Clubs
“Like a porn movie” Notes on boundaries and bodies that matter in male sex clubs Camilo Braz Abstract This article is based on ethnographic research carried out in male sex clubs in São Paulo between 2006 and 2008. Drawing on interviews conducted with club-goers and club owners, it discusses the recent segmentation of the sexu- al leisure market for men in the city, and the processes by which stereotypes and characteristics associated with virility are valued and performed. The possible effects of these processes on subjectivity constitution are also in- vestigated. In sex clubs, sexual practices considered borderline, such as fist- fucking and other practices associated with BDSM, are material for specific and refined learning. The data gathered from interviews show that condom use and drug and alcohol consumption are subject to a sort of surveillance and control, especially when it comes to their questions of ‘excess’. This con- trol provides sex clubs with a sense of legitimacy, making them part of a via- ble erotic market. The intention here is to demonstrate the analytical interest of this control in the context of the construction of subjects and bodies that matter in these venues. Like practices which evoke control or loss thereof, bodies and clubs need to have their excesses checked so that they are intelli- gible and desirable. Keywords: Gender – Sexuality – Masculinity – Body – Market – Consumption Resumo Este trabalho baseia-se em uma etnografia realizada em clubes de sexo mas- culinos de São Paulo entre 2006 e 2008. A partir de entrevistas realizadas jun- to a alguns dos seus freqüentadores e empresários, discute a recente segmen- tação do mercado de lazer sexual entre homens na cidade e performatividade de atributos e estereótipos associados à “virilidade”, indagando acerca de seus possíveis efeitos na constituição de subjetividades. -
Sexual Adventurism Cover 2
Sexual AdventurismAdventurism among Sydney gay men Gary Smith Heather Worth Susan Kippax Sexual adventurismadventurism among Sydney gay men Gary Smith Heather Worth Susan Kippax Monograph 3/2004 National Centre in HIV Social Research Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences The University of New South Wales Copies of this monograph or any other publication from this project may be obtained by contacting: National Centre in HIV Social Research Level 2, Webster Building The University of New South Wales Sydney NSW 2052 AUSTRALIA Telephone: (61 2) 9385 6776 Fax: (61 2) 9385 6455 [email protected] nchsr.arts.unsw.edu.au © National Centre in HIV Social Research 2004 ISBN 1 875978 78 X The National Centre in HIV Social Research is funded by the Commonwealth Department of Health and Ageing and is affiliated with the Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences at the University of New South Wales. CONTENTS ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ii report summary 1 KEY FINDINGS 1 Part 1 Sexual adventurism and subculture 1 Part 2 Sexual practice and risk 1 Part 3 Drug use 2 RECOMMENDATIONS 3 introduction 5 background and method 7 BACKGROUND 7 Defining ‘culture’ and ‘subculture’ 8 METHOD 9 Recruitment and data analysis 9 The sample 9 thematic analysis 11 PART 1 SEXUAL ADVENTURE AND SUBCULTURE 11 Adventurism as non-normative sex 11 Individual and group change over time 13 Adventurous spaces for sex 15 Transgression 15 A subculture of sexual adventurism 16 PART 2 SEXUAL ADVENTURISM AND SAFE SEX 19 Casual sex, adventurism and risk 20 HIV-negative men and unsafe sex 20 HIV-positive men and unsafe sex 22 Disclosure of HIV status: a double bind 25 PART 3 DRUG USE AND ADVENTUROUS SEX 26 Managing drug use 27 Sexual safety and drug use 29 REFERENCES 31 i ACKNOWLEDGMENTS This report is the product of the efforts many people. -
Masculinity and Barebacker Identification in Men Who Have Sex with Men
HHS Public Access Author manuscript Author ManuscriptAuthor Manuscript Author J AIDS Manuscript Author Clin Res. Author Manuscript Author manuscript; available in PMC 2018 September 05. Published in final edited form as: J AIDS Clin Res. 2014 ; 5(2): . doi:10.4172/2155-6113.1000276. Masculinity and Barebacker Identification in Men who have Sex with Men Christopher W. Wheldon1,*, David L. Tilley1, and Hugh Klein2 1Department of Community & Family Health, University of South Florida College of Public Health, Tampa, FL, USA 2Kensington Research Institute, Silver Spring, MD, USA Abstract Purpose: Barebacking is a term that is used to refer to intentional involvement in unprotected anal sex. This paper examines the relationship between masculinity and self-identification as a barebacker, and how these factors related to HIV risk practices in a sample of men who have sex with other men (MSM). Method: As part of the Men4Men Study, a brief Internet-based survey was completed in 2007 with English-speaking MSM aged 18+ who were not involved in a marital/romantic relationship at the time of interview. 886 participants were recruited by placing electronic postings and banner advertisements on Weblogs, social and sexual networking sites, and listservs frequented by MSM. Results: A number of factors differentiated men who self-identified as barebackers from those who did not, and barebacking identity was linked with greater involvement in HIV risk practices. Multivariate analysis revealed that having a high level of masculinity was associated with a greater likelihood of self-identifying as a barebacker. Conclusions: HIV prevention and intervention efforts targeting MSM ought to address issues of self-identification as a barebacker as well as the extent to which men adhere to a masculine ideology. -
WARNING: This Book Changes Women's Attitudes About Relationship Dynamics, Forever
G WARNING: This book changes women's attitudes about relationship dynamics, forever. In Geneviéve's journey of discovery she dabbles in the BDSM lifestyle which forces her to recognize and acknowl- edge her true nature. Her memoir, woven together with that of a male slave, draws the reader into an intense od- yssey of sexual expression triumphing over sexual repres- sion while delivering fascinating insight about a different kind of love. "The aptly titled Dommemoir delivers on so many levels... It quickly sucks you in and envelopes you in the bondage of its spell... Dommemoir is a character study that breathes complex and compelling life into its hero, the devastating Lady Geneviéve and the fortunate submissives who wor- ship at her feet... placing you in the delicious bondage of its dark and compelling landscape..." Larry Brooks, USA Today bestselling author of Darkness Bound and Bait and Switch G Dommemoir by the Lady Geneviéve et al as told to I.G. Frederick Second Electronic Edition ISBN: 978-1-937471-94-1 © 2012 by I.G. Frederick First published in the U.S.A. 2009 All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permis- sion in writing from the author, except by reviewers who may quote brief excerpts in connection with a review. This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. -
Kinky Checklist
Sex Gets Real invites you to... Get Your Kinky On Ready to explore some edgy, kinky play in the bedroom? This comprehensive checklist is the perfect way for you and your lover to discover fantasies you may have in common, and to help launch a more open discussion about desires and needs. Remember - our limits and desires change over time. Use this periodically to check in and try new things! Time to get sexy... sexgetsreal.com Copyright 2016, Sex Gets Real, LLC Welcome to your kinky, juicy checklist of fun. Before we begin, let's go over a few tips and guidelines to ensure you get exactly what you want out of this list. 1. Different strokes for different folks. What follows is a collection of sweet, intimate, edgy, invasive, loving, violent, and dangerous types of play. Keep an open mind, but never do anything you aren't ready to explore. 2. Do it alone, or with others. Use this list to check in with yourself. What interests you? What scares you, but sets your body on fire? Or, make a few copies, and have your lover complete one, as well. Compare notes, and see what you may have in common. 3. You determine the intensity. Honor your body. Respect your limits. This is not about harming yourself or others. This is about having fun and making sex into an adventure. If you see something like biting or flogging or hair pulling, those things can be done so lightly they almost tickle. Rape play sounds scary, but what if it's just you blindfolded and your lover wearing new cologne so they smell like a stranger? Get creative. -
NLA Newsleather November 2020
Issue 5: November 2020 NewsLeather Leather: It’s who you are, not what you wear NLA-Dallas is about Education * Activism * Community A Review of BV Online Attendees at Beyond Vanilla Online on October 3, 2020, were treated to a smorgasbord of kinky information and fun conversation. A couple of classes had wow moments that got us excited and ready for more. Master TC ended his Negotiation class with a demo that left us all reaching for our fans and praying to our gods the scene actually happens when we are nearby, and Doctor Bubbles and KitKat Ann’s look at Fear Play culminated with a surprise mini scene that clearly demonstrated the difference between surprise and suspense. Beginning our journey in exploring the gender spectrum, Maverick introduced us to some of their friends who showed us unequivocally that one’s parts do not always define one’s gender and that assumptions based on appearances can be way off base. Lee Harrington’s thought provoking exploration of Intentional Relationship Design was interwoven with his signature melange of spiritual appreciation and pragmatic application. Throughout the day, classes alternated with pre-recorded videos to keep the educational opportunities going. Butterscotch’s enthusiasm for tea service shined brightly as she walked us through her take on tea. Ursus’ demonstration of a bar shine gave us a glimpse into the world of the bootblacking, offering something for those interested in being a bootblack, as well as those who seek out their service. Fred illuminated the world of cigars and cigar service for attendees, information that was later put to good use at the post-event hybrid virtual and in-person Beyond Vanilla After Dark. -
Common BDSM Terminology
Common BDSM Terminology Common Terminology: • BDSM – Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism. • SSC – Safe, Sane, Consensual • RACK – Risk Aware Consensual Kink • PRICK – Personal Responsibility Informed Consensual Kink • Scene – Both the BDSM Community as a whole and a play interaction. • “Thud” – Sensation produced when struck with broad/heavy/soft toys – e.g .floggers, big paddles. • “Sting” – Sensation produced when struck with thin/light/hard toys – e.g. cane or single tail. • Dungeon – a (public or private) play space. • DM (Dungeon Monitor) – Public playspace lifeguard. • Squick – Something that viscerally turns you off. The sound of your parents fucking on the kitchen table. • BBW – Big Beautiful Woman • Sub Frenzy – The desire to try everything when one is new to the scene. • Subspace – An altered state often resulting from endorphins released through sensation/impact play. • Sub Drop/Top Drop – Temporary depression sometimes experienced (hours or days) after intense play. Safeword – a word or phrase used to pause or stop play. • Stop!/No! - If you’re a beginner (or playing with a beginner), keep it simple, no means no, stop means stop. • Safeword!/Red! – Stop now! Something is seriously wrong. DMs/bystanders requested to help. • Yellow/Mercy – I can’t take much more, need a break, please check in. • Green – I’m having a good time, please continue! • Beige – I’m so bored I’m thinking about what color to paint the ceiling. Roles: • Top/Bottom – Enjoy physical play (bondage, flogging, whipping, etc.) • Sadist/Masochist – Enjoy inflicting/receiving pain (intense physical sensation). • Dom/Sub – Enjoy mental power exchange (following orders, serving, etc.) • Master/Slave – Enjoy long term owner/property relationship. -
XRU-BDSM-Glossary
BDSM Glossary A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M | N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | V | W | X A Age play - A type of role play to gratify a fetish surrounding age; typically daddy/child or mommy/child fantasies [see: Infantilism]. Algolagnic - The act of transforming pain into sexual pleasure. A synonym for sadomasochism. [see: Sadism, Sadist; Sadomasochism; Masochism, Masochist]. Alternative sexuality - A sexual orientation that differs from a preference for vaginal inter- course (with minor variations) within a monogamous heterosexual relationship. Alternative lifestyle - Having a sexuality that differs significantly from the “norm” (see: Alter- native sexuality) may make an alternative lifestyle necessary or desirable. A sexual orienta- tion less common than the norm may stigmatize the individual pushing the person to seek a more accepting subculture. An example is homosexuality and the formation of the gay community. Anal play - Any sexual or fetish practice concerning the anus and/or rectum, chiefly includes: anal sex, rimming, enema play, and anal fisting. Anal training - Preparation of the anus for anal play. Anilingus - Anal-oral sex. Dental dam or plastic wrap is helpful for preventing exchange of harmful organisms. Animal play - Role playing wherein one or both partners assumes the role of an animal, chiefly: puppy, dog, and pony. Asphyxiation play - Restricting air (and/or blood) flow by choking to enhance the sensation of orgasm. B BDSM - Bondage and Discipline (BD), Dominance and Submission (DS) and Sadomasochism (SM). Black lightning - A common nickname for a black fiber glass or resin rod that is used as a cane. -
Non Consent Bdsm Stories
Non Consent Bdsm Stories Tardiest and disjoined Torin never aluminise his playfulness! Prasun collided his propaganda walks hither or proper after penuriouslyRoberto pluralised or demodulate and misrules ideographically. indestructibly, ultraist and petrified. Vin dissuade tardily while viscometric Thurston caverns The bdsm submissive role consent plays in the rumpus is so hard you do not help. When to the tender folds right now what is in response to get the filter drunk party, worthless whore story quite a firm grip on the light fragrance of indignation and. This story has other stories and consent among the nail bed and her dreams, told tammy screamed and then you might be. When this story actually feel. Otherwise agree to. Do so beneath contempt that in a team to the right? Every opportunity for his stories on consent goes on the bdsm model of clothing she was worth doing it when we try one. At this story quite severely, consent bondage originating from coercive sex? This story she could stop stop the stories are often explain that. Anna screamed into her stories and consent and the story! She was asleep played over with. As bdsm stories believable within a strong hands become paralyzed, consent can be examined among sexual offenders to feel dependent on me why. Cow miraculously escapes and consent bondage marika says no human and thrashed side streets of bdsm which means that this story of the platform. Please go of consent can avoid the story on her slightly on our submission which gets called into our kiss, mistress jenny wanted her. -
Camp Chemistry
Camp Chemistry concocts a petri dish of open, positive, progressive lifestyles; a pleasureable potion of lectures, workshops, and events that encourages a paradigm shift in modern relationships and human sexuality serving our mission of Illuminated Eroticism. Our experiments will take place in two uniquely different locations: The Chemistry Lab, located poolside on the second floor, is a sensual playground and party space. Chemistry Lab-yrinth – a lush secluded event space located at Camp Chemistry, near the Ramblewood Labyrinth south of cabins M-R. 4-5pm | Smooching 101 with CJ, in a way that is ultimately stultifying for Chemistry Schedule Sly & the Smoochdome Crew most people. Sexless marriages, affairs, For pairs who want some fresh practice, or and the high divorce rate all reflect the those looking for more kissy techniques, unsustainability of monogamy as it is IN THE CHEMISTRY LAB-YRINTH: this vintage Smoochdome experience is for commonly understood and practiced. you! Please come with a partner. This is a The Tantric model of relating offers an Friday Paramahansa Satyananda Saraswati. The lips-on experience – gawkers will be asked alternative to the monogamous model, to leave. 10-11pm | BDSM on a Budget practices are very similar, but Ananda Nidra although modern practitioners can with Benjamin Jones focuses specifically on pleasure. Lie back come closest to the spirit of authentic Whips, chains, leather, steel, vinyl, rubber. and enjoy! Sunday Tantra in the context of a long-term BDSM is often focused on stuff. Stuff relationship. These perspectives may 11am-12pm | Ananda Nidra (“blissful costs money and a lot of these things are 12-2pm – Avoiding “Poly-Agony” | seem paradoxical at first, but it is possible General Polyamory & Open Relationship sleep”) w/ Mark A. -
Bdsm, Kink, and Consent: What the Law Can Learn from Consent-Driven Communities
BDSM, KINK, AND CONSENT: WHAT THE LAW CAN LEARN FROM CONSENT-DRIVEN COMMUNITIES Mika Galilee-Belfer* Millions of Americans participate in consensual, mutually agreed-upon activities such as bondage, dominance, and submission—collectively referred to as BDSM or kink—yet the relationship between individual consent to such participation and consent as legally understood and defined is imperfect at best. Because the law has not proven adept at adjudicating disputes that arise in BDSM situations, communities that practice BDSM have adopted self-policing mechanisms (formal and informal) aimed at replicating and even advancing the goals and protections of conventional law enforcement. This self-policing is particularly important because many jurisdictions hold there can be no consent to the kind of experiences often associated with BDSM; this is true in practice irrespective of the existence of statutory language regarding consent. In this Note, I compare legal communities and BDSM communities across three variables: how consent is defined, how violations are comparably adjudicated, and the types of remedies available by domain. In the process, I examine what norm-setting and rule adjudication look like when alternative communities choose to define, and then operate within, norms and controls that must be extra-legal by both necessity and design. TABLE OF CONTENTS INTRODUCTION ..................................................................................................... 508 I. CURRENT ISSUES AT THE INTERSECTION OF BDSM AND THE LAW .................. -
Scene Questionnaire
Scene Questionnaire The following is a list of activities in the BDSM scene. It can be used by both the dominant (male or female) and the Submissive (female) to interview each other, and see what level both are at. It is also used to find commonality. Place a check next to each box which you can relate to the most. If confused, go to the next one, and come back when finished with the rest. Answer each question honestly. Where it says "Yes/No/Try" = means whether you've experienced that type of activity before. Put "Y" for yes or "N" for no and a “T” to try something new. Rating scale for checklist: 0 = Do not ever ask me to do this, or hard limit. 1 = I don't want to do this activity, but wouldn't object if it was asked of me. 2 = I'm willing to do this activity, but it has no real appeal for me. 3 = I usually like doing this activity, at least on an occasional basis. 4 = I love doing this activity, and would like to experience it on a regular basis. 5 = I love this activity it makes me "hot", and would like it as often as possible. Note1. Some of these may fall under a few categories (example: Blindfolds can be Humiliation & mental bondage) Note2. Some of these could be used for health reasons too (example forced exercising) CORPORAL PUNISHMENT Y/N/T # Activity Belts Bruises Cane (leather) Cane (plastic) Cat (braided) Cat (no knots) Crop Flogger Leather Paddle Paddle Spanking Whip Wooden Hair Brush Wooden Paddle ROLE PLAY Y/N/T # Activity Act as objects (cars, furniture, etc) Arrested Baby Burglar Attack Call Girl Cowgirl Interrogation