Faust/How I Rose
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FAUST/HOW I ROSE John Jesurun CHARACTERS LETTER #1 FAUST (FAUST flying above burning city, into GRETCHEN (RHONDA speakerphon.) . and an occasional brain KINDERMOERD) cell, for what, I ask you, ? I ask you, for what? Hello? Hello . ? Patchouli . MEPHISTOPHELES Patchouli! Can you hear me? . I’m PHAEDRA, A Mouse, Friend, and dictating letter #1 . all right . ok . Confidant to Faust (Phone goes dead.) ABDULLÁ, Assistant to Mephistopheles Letter #1. Dear one, I am writing you from JUDGE an airplane above your country. The com- puter breakdown continues over most of BABY KINDERMOERD, Child of the hemisphere. The nation is in a coma. Gretchen We are just about over the border, I don’t know if you’ll ever get this. As we move away we see only smoke and light. It’s hard SCENES to tell if it is fog or exhaust or light from the city but I would hate to tell you that your 1. LETTER #1 city is destroyed while you are still in it. But 2. DEAR PHAEDRA then you may know that already. Then 3. THE FALL again, we both know its true and you are just a photograph in my hands now. And 4. DEFENSE MEETING your city is smoke and vapor. Our plane 5. THE TRIAL OF FAUST: RHONDA continues to circle, sniffing the tureens of KINDERMOERD silence that surround it. What happened to the hotel? Hello, can you hear me? Hello...? 6. PLOT A 7. MONOLOGO—ABDULLÁ 8. LA MUERTE DE PHAEDRA DEAR PHAEDRA 9. MEPHISTOPHELES AS (In FAUST’s office; FAUST, MEPHI- GRETCHEN STOPHELES.) 10. HOW I ROSE FAUST: (Speaking into phone.) Rhonda, 11. DEAR GRETCHEN could you take this down for me? Dear 98 PAJ 78 (2004), pp. 98–127. © 1996 John Jesurun Downloaded from http://www.mitpressjournals.org/doi/pdf/10.1162/1520281041969002 by guest on 30 September 2021 Phaedra, I’m sorry it’s all worked out this universe and the moon moving that changes way. I never imagined it would turn out this everything. And because they move they way. I never wanted it to turn out this way. make time move and it’s time moving that What could I do? How could I change it? I kills everything, that makes everything die. had no power, no control over anything. I ask you, what is this incessant need to move? MEPHISTOPHELES: It was Faust who in his uncertainty and namby pambyism FAUST: You’re moving right now. Don’t couldn’t decide how to save her. believe him, Phaedra. Poor Phaedra. FAUST: Shut up asshole. And so, in that MEPHISTOPHELES: She can’t hear you. split second of time you were lost to me She’s a forever now. As if one move would forever. make them feel alive And realize the conse- quences of their movements. Do you think MEPHISTOPHELES: Strawberry fields for- Jupiter feels the consequences of its move- ever. ments? It’s just a dumb planet circulating as you, Phaedra, were a dumb mouse circulat- FAUST: And you became a strawberry mark ing as you my dear Gretchen are just a on the rug. That’s all that was left of you. fattened calf moving around the slaughter- house looking for a sledgehammer. No pain, MEPHISTOPHELES: I told her to stay no gain. Vade ad formicam, o piger, et hidden and not move, the fool. considera viaseius et disce sapientiam. Go to the ant, you sluggard and consider its FAUST: But you moved. And then the ways and learn wisdom. world moved. And threw you out of its orbit. FAUST: It’s this need to move that colors everything. That makes everything hurt. Is MEPHISTOPHELES: And then Faust that what it is? didn’t move. MEPHISTOPHELES: It causes everything FAUST: And then God and the Devil to pain and pale. It’s how the universe moved. I told you they always move to- works. Consider its ways and learn wisdom gether. But in different directions. Gretchen. MEPHISTOPHELES: I did not move. It FAUST: Don’t tempt me. wasn’t me. You see, the devil never moves. Everything around me moves. That’s the MEPHISTOPHELES: Did someone men- problem. I stay constantly still. It’s every- tion the word temptation? In the beginning thing else that moves. Do you see me was the word. moving? I’m talking to you but do you see my mouth moving? No. Ask them at the FAUST: And the word was with you. Politburo cantina, they know me better than you do. MEPHISTOPHELES: Neither do I tempt nor am I tempted. As I was hurtling down FAUST: Liar. from heaven at twice the speed of speed, I said to me: NBever tempt or tempted be MEPHISTOPHELES: Never moved a mil- but it was too late. Never be a tempter nor limeter, never changed an ounce. It’s god tempted be. Never be tempted nor a tempter moving and everyone moving and the plants be. In those seconds I thought I too would and planets moving and all the trash in the be a strawberry mark on the face of the JESURUN / Faust/How I Rose 99 Downloaded from http://www.mitpressjournals.org/doi/pdf/10.1162/1520281041969002 by guest on 30 September 2021 universe. But my fate was different because MEPHISTOPHELES: Get over it. Phaedra I stayed still and didn’t move and I have did. stayed still for millennia. And that was what I was trying to tell that fucking mouse FAUST: Lift up your strawberry-sized heart before she moved and the world shifted. and sing. FAUST: And you disappeared, Phaedra. MEPHISTOPHELES: Shut up about that But have you really disappeared? I hear that stupid mouse already. Do you want to get there are other parallel worlds. us thrown out of the delegation? MEPHISTOPHELES: You see they never FAUST: And now your head is in the tell me anything because I stay the same. I clouds in a world which I will never be can only travel in my own universe. allowed to see. FAUST: How the hell did we end up in the MEPHISTOPHELES: But I lived there same universe? once or I think I remember I did, didn’t I? Or am I making it up in my bitterness. And MEPHISTOPHELES:You’d think I would now I’m nothing but a three-legged knock- know about other universes or planes but I kneed dog knock, knock, knocking on don’t. heaven’s door. It’s a pity I never got to show her hell She would have loved it. FAUST: You do and you’re not telling me. MEPHISTOPHELES: God never told me. THE FALL—OR HOW I FELL The jerk. He’s been hiding things from me the way you have. Don’t you know you can’t (Phaedra, Faust, Mephistopheles in a bar.) hide anything from me? FAUST: What are you? FAUST: Get that chocolate away from me. MEPHISTOPHELES: You mean how did I MEPHISTOPHELES: Humans are always fall? Boy was I taken for a ride. I was hurled, hiding things from each other. What is that? vomited straight out of heaven. Run out of Where does it come from? And don’t look town on a rail. at me. I always wanted to know everything. I didn’t want anything hidden. The more I PHAEDRA: When was that? knew the more I slipped from the grace of heaven. The darker and more daring I MEPHISTOPHELES: In mouse time about became. 666 billion light years ago. Or thereabouts. FAUST: Phaedra, I’m sorry. There I go FAUST: What the hell did you do? talking about myself again and now you’re sad. But I’m trying to explain. Poor Phaedra, MEPHISTOPHELES: I had fallen in love it was all too much for you. I dragged you with another angel or something like that I into this. think. How the hell did I know it was illegal or unknown. Love didn’t exist then. I had to MEPHISTOPHELES: And now you’re a invent it and then pay the price. Then once stain on the rug. he threw me out I had to invent a place for him to put me. But nothing existed then, FAUST: He did this to you. Poor dear only love for god and him for us. But it Phaedra. wasn’t called love. I don’t know what it was 100 PAJ 78 Downloaded from http://www.mitpressjournals.org/doi/pdf/10.1162/1520281041969002 by guest on 30 September 2021 . obedience, glorifying. I don’t remember MEPHISTOPHELES: Oh great. Well, it’s ever loving god. Not in the way I loved the up to you. But that will change as you get to other angel. know me. FAUST: Who was it? FAUST: Will you shut up for a minute? MEPHISTOPHELES: It’s too long ago to MEPHISTOPHELES: Jeez. I’m just trying remember. You’d think I would remember to explain a few things . as I said, there the object and reason of my disastrous fate. was no love then. How do you like that? You invent love and get thrown out of heaven. So, ok it was a PHAEDRA: Yeah, right. Who let you in mistake. How did I know? He said it was here? my pride. What pride? There was no such thing as pride or love or sex or sexes. There MEPHISTOPHELES: There was no con- was just light. It was a big bore. Or words. cept of it And I brought this up to him. You know: “In the beginning was the word?” And he hurled me out, kicked me to the Not true.