THURSDAY,Campus SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / VOLUME 142, ISSUE 13 Times SERVING THE UNIVERSITY OF ROCHESTER COMMUNITY SINCE 1873 / campustimes.org Dining New modifies laundry hours of system operation introduced

BY JULIANNE McADAMS BY JUSTIN TROMBLY MANAGING EDITOR OPINIONS EDITOR

Starting this fall, the hours In an overhaul of River of operations have changed at Campus laundry facilities, the various dining locations across Office of Residential Life and campus. Housing Services (ResLife) has Marketing Manager for Dining changed the laundry payment Services Kevin Aubrey said in system for undergraduates living an email, “Our goal is always on campus. to provide the comprehensive New washing and drying dining program that our machines have also been consumers demand while being installed in every dorm, with smart with your dining dollars the exception of Riverview. Also to maximize the program in all starting this semester, students aspects. [...] Before making any can use the UR Mobile app to changes to hours of operation, PARSA LOTFI / PHOTO EDITOR find available machines and we try to take a hard look at SCIENCE GUY: 'KEEP EXPLORING' track existing laundry cycles. patron counts to see how many Executive Director of patrons we would displace with Campus Activities Board brought Bill Nye to campus as the Yellowjacket Weekend speaker. In a sold-out Strong Auditorium, Residential Life and Housing Nye discussed climate change, space exploration and how to change the world. For a review, see page 13. any one change.” Services Laurel Contomanolis Danforth and Douglass explained over email that the Dining Centers both close an Beals commit $2 million for film music changes at UR follow a trend hour earlier than they did last among other area colleges to year, with Danforth closing at promote more efficient and 8 p.m. and Douglass closing and media institute at Eastman convenient laundry services. at 7 p.m. While Douglass’s BY ANGELA LAI “that’s where I think the real She has provided vocals for the The decision came after ResLife dinner hours have shortened, NEWS EDITOR beauty of the institute is, in that ‘House of Cards’ score as well as was approached by the Office the building will be open for it’s not home to offer a degree [...] many other film and television of Facilities and Auxiliary continental breakfast at 7 a.m., Eastman School of Music it is a place to provide really special works. Operations last spring about half an hour earlier than before. alumni and couple Jeff Beal and unique opportunities for In a phone interview, Mrs. moving toward a new system. Other locations with changed ‘85E and Joan Beal ‘84E, a projects, for bringing guest artists, Beal explained that “Eastman has Rather than having students hours of operation are Starbucks, noted composer and vocalist to do things like Jeff did—bring­ ­a always been very important to manually pay $2.50 each time Pura Vida, Hillside POD Market respectively, officially committed guest and [...] really work through us, because it was the foundation they use a washing machine, Rocky’s Sub Shop, and the $2 million to Eastman for the a project with them together.” of our musical training and we laundry fees are now factored Commons. While Starbucks creation of the Beal Institute for Mr. Beal, a 15-time Emmy always felt we owed a lot to our into room and board costs; this was open until 2 a.m. Thursday Film Music and Contemporary nominee and three-time Emmy training.” The two also met at way, the fees are prepaid, and through Saturday, it now closes Media on Sept. 1. winner, graduated from Eastman Eastman and married after Mr. students no longer need to add at 1 a.m. Friday and Saturday, Separate from the institute, with a Bachelor of Music degree Beal’s junior year. money to their URos account. and at midnight on weekdays. Eastman has been developing with High Distinction and will She and Mr. Beal, she said, had While the new program Pura Vida now closes at 5:30 a degree in film scoring and been discussing “wanting to help operates the same in Brooks p.m. Monday through Thursday, digital media under the Jazz and ‘Seeing how excited the the school” for many years, and Crossing as it does elsewhere as opposed to 6:30 p.m. last year. Contemporary Media department students were about they eventually decided that the on campus—as part of a vendor Hillside opens later and closes for the past few years. The degree donation and staying involved contract—Riverview’s fees were earlier than last year on Monday program and the institute are this? That’s what we’re would be the “best way” to do it. eliminated through a special through Wednesday, on which negotiation with the facility’s expected to launch in the fall of doing it for.’ She credited passionate Eastman days it will be operating from 2016. students for “getting us excited owner. 9 a.m. to 1 a.m. Thursdays and Jamal Rossi, Joan and Martin serve as the institute’s artistic about staying involved,” noting The laundry process itself Fridays have a later opening time Messinger Dean at the Eastman director. Among his wide range recent Eastman graduates Dylan remains mostly unchanged from (9 a.m.) than last year, but the School, explained in a phone of work, he has scored films and Price and Michael Staffeldt for previous years. closing time will still be 3 a.m. interview that the goal of the television series like ‘Ugly Betty,’ founding the Empire Film Music “Students swipe the black Weekend hours are the same institute is to “create opportunities” ‘The Newsroom’ and ‘House Ensemble (EFME) two years box in the laundry room and except for Sunday, when Hillside for students to cross “between of Cards.’ He frequently plays ago while they were students. pick a machine,” Contomanolis closes at 1 a.m. classical music and jazz and all instruments for his own scores. EFME performed live music to explained. “It doesn’t take Rocky’s Sub Shop now accepts these artificial boundaries we put Mrs. Beal, a vocalist who accompany film screenings in a money from your account.” meal swipes beginning at 8 p.m., up, to do really creative projects graduated from Eastman with concert headlined by Mr. Beal Machines in Riverview, on the and its Thursday closing time and that’s whether it’s film music a Bachelor of Music degree, last April. other hand, are turned on by has been moved up to midnight. or contemporary media.” has premiered works by famed “Seeing how excited the pushing in a coin slide. Wilson Commons now has Rossi explained that while the composers and performed in students were about this? That’s Residential Advisors were SEE HOURS PAGE 4 degree is ‘outside’ the institute, numerous professional ensembles. SEE BEALS PAGE 4 SEE LAUNDRY PAGE 4 UR TECH: APPLE LET’S MAKE A DEAL LIFE GOALS INSIDE EVENT THIS CT What’s new from Cupertino? Examining the pros and cons Men’s soccer went into overtime Apple unveils the iPad Pro, of the Obama administration’s this weekend to smash Rutgers- iPhone 6s, and more. nuclear deal with Iran. Newark.

CHRISTIAN CIERI / ILLUSTRATOR PAGE 8 FEATURES PAGE 6 OPINIONS PAGE 16 SPORTS PAGE 2 / campustimes.org NEWS / THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 WEEKEND FORECAST COURTESY OF WEATHER.COM

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PUBLIC SAFETY UPDATE Unaffiliated male attempts to film in stacks

/ CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER BY ANGELA LAI AARON RAYMOND e-cigarette. The vapor from the STUDENTS ENJOY YELLOWJACKET CARNIVAL RIDES NEWS EDITOR e-cigarette activated the smoke UR students kicked off the year with the annual Yellowjacket Weekend celebrations, enjoying free “Feel the Sting” T-shirts, 1. On Sept. 6 at 5:35 p.m., alarm, causing the building carnival rides and food from local vendors on Saturday, Sept. 5. UR Department of Public evacuation alarm to go off. The Safety (DPS) officers responded area was checked and the alarm to reports of a loud male in was reset. The student and THIS WEEK ON CAMPUS the Rush Rhees stacks. Upon the visitor were advised not arrival, officers located a male to smoke anything, including THURSDAY matching the given description e-cigarettes, in the building. SEPTEMBER 10 speaking loudly into his cell No damage was reported. PARKING MANAGEMENT CENTER OPEN HOUSE SOUTH WEDGE-UCATION phone. The male stated that GOLER HOUSE, 11:30 P.M. - 1:30 P.M. BUSES LEAVE FROM ITS, 5:00 P.M. - 7:00 P.M. he was recording himself on Students warned Parking Management offers a chance to tour their Rochester’s City Newspaper offers deals and his cell phone for YouTube to stay off roof new location in Goler House and discuss services giveaways to UR students in the South Wedge videos. The male was identified available to UR students and staff. Refreshments will neighborhood. First 250 students will receive a free and determined as unaffiliated 3. On Sept. 4 at 4:57 p.m., be served after the tour. goodie bag. with the University. Officers DPS officers responded to informed the male that he was a house on the Fraternity FRIDAY disruptive and needed to leave Quadrangle where six to eight SEPTEMBER 11 the building. The male was people were observed out on 9/11 VIGIL ‘AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON’ the roof. Officers responded EASTMAN QUADRANGLE, 12:30 P.M. - 3:00 P.M. HOYT AUDITORIUM, 6:30 P.M., 9:15 P.M. & 12:00 A.M. escorted from the building to UR’s NROTC battalion will hold a vigil in front of Rush UR Cinema Group presents Marvel’s ‘Avengers: Age his vehicle and left the property to the rooms in the house that Rhees Library in remembrance of those who were of Ultron.’ Tickets are $3 for students and can be without any incident. have roof access and located killed in the Sept. 11, 2001 terrorist attacks. purchased in advance at the Common Market. two students who admitted to E-cigarette sets off fire alarm being on the roof for a short time. A third student admitted 2. On Sept. 2 at 2:43 p.m., to being on the roof. No one SATURDAY DPS officers responded to the else was found on the roof, and SEPTEMBER 12 fire alarm in Susan B. Anthony no one else was identified. All WELCOME BACK BBQ SIGMA BETA RHO PRESENTS ‘FUSION’ DOUGLASS LEADERSHIP HOUSE, 12:00 - 3:00 P.M. DANDELION SQUARE, 2:00 P.M. - 4:00 P.M. Residence Halls. Upon arrival, three were advised about the Douglass Leadership House will be hosting its first Come enjoy a cultural expo featuring Rice Crew, the officers found that the dangers of being on the roof annual Welcome Back BBQ with food, fun and BPG, Bhangra, Radiance, Korean Percussion Group, alarm had generated on the and advised that they need games. Xclusive, Sihir Bellydance, Yellowjackets, Vocal Point second floor. The officers were to stay off the roof. The three and many more. Hosted by the brothers of Sigma also approached by a student students were cooperative and Beta Rho. who stated that the alarm had agreed to stay off the roof. SUNDAY activated in his room. The Lai is a member of SEPTEMBER 13 student stated that he had the class of 2018. M&T BANK CLOTHESLINE FESTIVAL ALPHA DELTA PHI BUBBLE BOWL had a visitor in his room and Information provided by MEMORIAL ART GALLERY, 10:00 A.M. - 5:00 P.M. EASTMAN EAST HATCH HALL, 12:00 - 2:00 P.M. the visitor began to smoke an UR Public Safety. Browse and buy original work by New York State Teams of four can compete in a soccer tournament artists, enjoy entertainment and activities and sample while wearing inflatable bubble suits. Tickets are food at Rochester’s largest and longest-running fine $10, and all proceeds will go to Stop Soldier Suicide. Alert UR Fall Test set for Sept. 17 arts and crafts festival. Admission costs $5 and is free Hosted by Alpha Delta Phi Fraternity. The fall semester test of AlertUR, the University’s emergency for children 10 and under. notification system, will occur on Thursday, Sept. 17 at 6 p.m. It will not disrupt scheduled activities. AlertUR tests are scheduled twice a If you are sponsoring an event that you wish to submit for the calendar, please email [email protected] by Monday evening with a brief summary, including: the date, time, location, sponsor and cost of admission. year. The goal of AlertUR is to quickly transmit news and instructions to students, faculty, and staff throughout the University—including Campus Times the Medical Center—in the event of an emergency. SERVING THE UNIVERSITY OF ROCHESTER COMMUNITY SINCE 1873 Students are automatically enrolled via their Rochester e-mail. At Wilson Commons 102 any time, students are encouraged to update their preferences and University of Rochester, Rochester, NY 14627 contact information at www.rochester.edu/alertur. Office: (585) 275-5942 / Fax: (585) 273-5303 Information provided by UR Communications. campustimes.org / [email protected] EDITOR-IN-CHIEF AARON SCHAFFER MANAGING EDITOR JULIANNE McADAMS NEWS EDITORS ANGELA LAI HUMOR EDITORS ERIK CHIODO Want to make the SAM PASSANISI NATE KUHRT FEATURES EDITORS RAAGA KANAKAM SPORTS EDITORS DANI DOUGLAS TANIMA PODDAR MAX EBER headlines? OPINIONS EDITOR JUSTIN TROMBLY PHOTO EDITOR PARSA LOTFI A&E EDITORS JEFFREY HOWARD ILLUSTRATOR CHRISTIAN CIERI Join the Campus Times. AUREK RANSOM ONLINE EDITOR JUSTIN FRAUMENI COPY EDITOR SCOTT ABRAMS

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THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / NEWS campustimes.org / PAGE 3 Beta Theta Pi and Kappa Alpha Theta Humanities Center opens to open chapters at UR doors on English, history BY SAM PASSANISI fraternity or sorority life but chapter. Educational Leadership BY AUREK RANSOM NEWS EDITOR haven’t found the right group yet,” Consultants Annie Hornung A&E EDITOR University will be speaking on DiSarro explained. and Savannah Vogel will live in Oct. 29, and three other speakers, For the first time since 2010, a Beta Theta Pi approached Rochester for the following year Professor Gerald Early, the Merle all former or current directors of pair of new Greek organizations UR in 2012, looking to open to recruit and train new members Kling Professor of Modern Letters, humanities centers, will be featured will be establishing chapters an new chapter on the campus. of the sorority. Hornung and Professor of English and of African as part of the inaugural series. at UR this year. Beta Theta Pi At the time, FSA officials felt Vogel will be tabling in Wilson and Afro-American Studies at Since its formation in April, the Fraternity and Kappa Alpha that the group would be a good Commons from Sept. 14-24 and Washington University in St. Louis, Center has created approximately a Theta Sorority will both send addition to the University’s Greek will host information sessions will deliver the inaugural lecture at dozen programs for faculty, students representatives to campus this community, but that the timing during that time. On Sept. 25 and UR’s Humanities Center. and the Rochester community. It year to recruit founding members was wrong. DiSarro noted that 26, they will meet with interested Dexter Perkins Professor in also inherited multiple lecture series and to colonize the new chapters. Psi Upsilon and Alpha Delta sophomores, juniors and seniors, History and Interim Director of the and symposia from various sources. No new Greek organizations Phi fraternities were scheduled followed by a Bid Day for the UR Humanities Center Joan Rubin At the forefront of the Center’s have been established at Rochester to be reinstated in 2013, after charter members on Sept. 27. noted the good fortune of having future plan is an ongoing push to since 2010, when the Chi Omega having been disaffiliated from In January 2016, Kappa Alpha Professor Early as the inaugural engage undergraduate students who and Delta Phi Omega sororities UR. Therefore, DiSarro said, “the Theta will be able to participate in lecturer in the Center. are interested in the humanities. established chapters. The most decision was made to delay Beta Panhellenic sorority rush to recruit “He is such an accomplished “We really want undergraduates recent fraternity to open at UR Theta Pi’s colonization until the their first pledge class. DiSarro said scholar of African-American to know that they’re welcome at all was Sigma Beta Rho, in 2002. existing Rochester groups had that the Panhellenic Association culture and literature,” Rubin said. of our events,” Rubin said. Beta Theta Pi and Kappa Alpha stabilized.” Last year, he added, voted to open an eighth sorority “We got the idea of having a series To that end, a new creation of Theta will join the Interfraternity the IFC met with the national on campus last year, and that of speakers who can help us build the Center is the Undergraduate Council (IFC) and Panhellenic Beta Theta Pi organization and Kappa Alpha Theta was chosen our own [humanities center], then Conversations series, geared Association, respectively. invited them to colonize a chapter from among 10 applicants. we thought about what institutions toward its namesake demographic. The opportunity for new at UR. Both Beta Theta Pi and Kappa were kind of like us. I thought, ‘Oh, The first lecture of the series will Greek organizations to colonize Colin Close, the Associate Alpha Theta will handle their wow—if we could get this guy, be delivered by UR Professor Ezra at Rochester came about when Director of Recruitment and own recruitment processes that’d be terrific. […] I’ve heard that Tawil on September 29 and is Fraternity and Sorority Affairs Colony Development for Beta internally, with Close, Hornung he’s a great speaker.” The lecture will entitled “The Humanities and the (FSA) officials noted increasing Theta Pi, will come to Rochester and Vogel working to interest be held on Sept. 24 from 5 p.m. American Difference.” There will be Greek membership at UR. next month, and the fraternity undergraduates in their respective to 7 p.m. in the Hawkins-Carlson three Conversations each in the Fall Director of Fraternity and will begin recruiting in January. organizations. However, DiSarro Room of Rush Rhees Library. 2015 and Spring 2016 semesters. Sorority Affairs John DiSarro “During our colonization said that FSA is closely involved Professor Early’s lecture is the first Rubin praised the support of also said that over the past several process, the Fraternity’s expansion with both organizations and will of many slated to occur during the University administration in the years, only half of students who team will recruit founding fathers be coordinating room reservations, 2015-2016 academic year: MIT formation of the Center, saying, participated in fraternity or who want to excel on campus banners and tabling schedules Institute Professor and Professor “we have been very fortunate to sorority rush ended up joining [...] while building a genuine “on their behalf until they have of Linguistics, Emeritus Noam benefit from the support of the any organization. fraternity experience that will last undergraduate members to put Chomsky will be featured in April University administration at the “I hope these new organizations for generations,” Close said. these in directly.” through the Center’s Distinguished highest levels.” provide more options to students Kappa Alpha Theta has Passanisi is a member of Visiting Humanist program; Ransom is a member of who may be interested in also begun work on their new the class of 2017. Professor R. Larry Todd of Duke the class of 2017.

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10 Winthrop St., only 4 blocks from Eastman School of Music! Open daily 7 a.m. to 9 p.m. | hartslocalgrocers.com PAGE 4 / campustimes.org NEWS / THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 Beals ResLife Dining hours shift across campus are now not able to go there.” Aubrey said. “For example, commit $2 aims to HOURS FROM PAGE 1 He added that “it puts more some, if not all, of the changes shorter hours for Panda Express pressure on freshman who can’t from last year to this year are fine- million for create easier and the Salad Bar; these two use their unlimited passes” if tuning revisions from previous stations close at 10 p.m. instead Danforth closes before they get additions to the schedules based of midnight. out of practice. on feedback from students, media music laundry Sophomore Matthew Bathon Junior Sam Polk was less campus groups and more.” said he was disappointed with affected by the changes. “The Aubrey also said that changes institute experience the earlier closing time at way that I eat is that I tend to to the current system would not Danforth. He mentioned his eat off campus if it’s later, so be made without first allowing FROM PAGE 1 FROM PAGE 1 BEALS LAUNDRY experience as a member of the [Danforth] closing early doesn’t enough time for students what we’re doing it for,” she said. informed of the change at the fencing team. really affect me.” to realize the changes and “Whenever we go back and just start of the semester and were “We get out [of practice] at “It’s certainly not a foolproof consequently observe “adjusted see the students, and what they’re asked to inform their residents like 8:30, and traditionally we process, but, as ever, we always traffic patterns.” doing and how creative they are that the unlimited laundry would [go to] Danforth, but try to take customer feedback McAdams is a member of and how talented they are, we privileges are not meant to be since the hours changed, we and adjust as we feel is necessary,” the class of 2017. feel an impetus to help them out. abused. For example, students Because we know what that feels are not permitted to do laundry like, when you’re starting out for their non-UR-affiliated your career but you don’t know friends or families. what job opportunities are out Furthermore, only on-campus there or how your skills will fit students are able to use the new into the larger world.” system. Audiences have shown Contomanolis asked that increased interest in hearing music students use “high efficiency” composed for contemporary laundry detergent, which she media, Mrs. Beal added. said works better with the newly “The lines are blurring between minted machines. what we might say is traditional Otherwise, she indicated only symphonic repertoire and music that student life would benefit for media that’s being performed from ResLife’s changes. by these ensembles,” she said. “Better and easier laundry “What we’re hoping to teach experience for students, less are the skills that will enable hassle,” Contomanolis said students to create music in of her goals in implementing whatever style, whatever genre the new laundry system. “We they want, utilizing the current should also be able to see when technology [...] We’re saying a laundry machine is offline [or] here’s a tool, now do with it what not working and be able to fix you will to create music that will it earlier.” Valid through December 31, 2015 accompany visuals.” Trombly is a member of Lai is a member of the class of 2018. the class of 2018.

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©2014 JIMMY JOHN’S FRANCHISE, LLC ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / OPINIONS campustimes.org / PAGE 5 OPINIONS EDITORIAL CARTOON EDITORIAL BOARD Avoiding ticket mayhem

There were hundreds. They lines—rushed to class after be conducted to allow for shuffled around the first floor they were confronted with the improved sales predictions and of Wilson Commons, starting unfortunate reality that they from the Common Market, would be unable to purchase a snaking through the Ruth ticket. We encourage CHRISTIAN CIERI / ILLUSTRATOR Merrill Center and back to Although we appreciate Wilson Commons Rocky’s Sub Shop. The students efforts to make the event FROM THE EDITOR waited for hours, inching along more accessible through the staff to consider and as the line moved forward. Simulcasting of the event, the Between the lines: Their reward: a chance to score outcome of this ticket fiasco experiment with other tickets to see millenials’ favorite was frenzied. The bloated crowd options for selling “science guy,” Bill Nye. clogging the Commons and a changing Turkey In the days since, students the disappointment of those tickets. backdrop of the Turkey-PKK have decried the system used who were either unable to skip peace process, which started in to sell tickets as unfair, both in class or too far back in the line accomodating sales times. 2012 and produced a ceasefire, terms of timing and in the way to buy a ticket before they sold Our suggestions are which has since ended. Bombings tickets are sold. out were symptomatic of larger straightforward and easy by both sides have led to raids; inefficiencies. to implement. Wilson which have led to arrests; which Many of those who We encourage Wilson Commons administration has have led to protests, more arrests had class at the time Commons administration to acknowledged that last week’s and the deaths of more civilians, consider and exp­­­eriment with problems arose because student BY AARON SCHAFFER soldiers and insurgents in Turkey. felt shortchanged other options for selling tickets. interest in the event had been This week, an attack by the EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Increased online sales would estimated improperly, and PKK in the village of Daglica in because their classes relieve some of the bloat during we thank them for candidly southeast Turkey killed 16 Turkish It’s difficult to explain why I first sale times. recognizing this. soldiers. Mobs and protests have directly conflicted chose to go to Turkey. Originally, Alternative sale schedules— These practices would ease since targeted newspaper offices I jumped into studying abroad with the sale of the during evening hours, for the stress on students buying and political parties. (a requirement for my major, instance, when more students tickets and ease the strains on Two Vice News journalists were tickets. International Relations) with the are likely to be free of academic staff selling tickets. We suggest arrested and released on terror- understanding that it’d be best to obligations—would open that changes be made soon in related charges last week, and their get away from the “traditional” Those who had class at up sales to more students. anticipation of future events— cameraman, Mohammed Ismael locations most people choose. the time felt shortchanged. Additionally, we suggest Wilson Commons doesn’t need Rasool, is still detained. Frederike My first academic experience Others—turned off by the that more surveys and polls more clogged pipes. Geerdink, a Dutch journalist, was abroad was in Istanbul, Turkey’s “in custody” this past weekend, largest city. It is a city of about but has been released. Various 14 million people and is layered news outlets have reported that she in thousands of years of history will be deported. and multiple empires. Istanbul is The backdrop of all of these Ironing out the future of laundry unmatched in terms of modern events is the Turkish electoral urban life. It is a bustling system. Elections were held earlier At last, there is no more need their predecessors required. The be tracked. metropolis, where you can see this year, and four political parties to navigate through the process dryers, too, have been revamped; We appreciate ResLife’s efforts both anything and everything: received over 10 percent of the of funneling money into URos new options and features make to add checks and balances to this street vendors who directly engage vote. The parties—the ruling AKP, accounts for laundry, or to worry the laundry experience more seemingly free-range policy; only with you, a distinct lack of traffic secular CHP, nationalist MHP later about how much is left. efficient. on-campus residents can dip into law enforcement and conservative and the pro-Kurdish HDP—did Laundry services at UR have Paying for laundry at the this prepaid advantage, and it’s cafes and trendy bars that have not come to an agreement to form finally been revamped. beginning of the year eliminates been emphasized by ResLife staff extremely different clienteles. a new government. Recep Tayyip We welcome ResLife’s bold the chore of having to keep that efforts will be made to curb Istanbul was really the first city I Erdogan—the former Prime steps to improve the efficiency pumping URos into an account any abuse. Furthermore, this had a connection with. Minister and member of the and accessibility of our washing that is, for many, otherwise new system will benefit more I went to Turkey for the second AKP—is now President, and he is and drying needs. With this new untouched. While “free” students than it hurts, even if time this summer. I learned grappling arguably with his most system, which factors laundry laundry is an illusion—laundry Turkish in Ankara, the country’s insecure political position ever. fees into residential costs and fees are included in room-and- While ‘free’ laundry capital and second-largest city, and Early elections will be happening installs new machines in almost board costs—the relative ease lived with a host family. Ankara is is an illusion— in seven weeks, on November 1. of paying up-front is almost much more suitable for a work- Many outside observers of certainly an improvement. intensive environment, with fewer For the majority of laundry fees are Turkey have connected these We acknowledge that this one- distractions than Istanbul. dots—the uptick in violence, size-fits-all approach to laundry included in room- One Friday night this summer UR students, this new crackdown on press freedoms and billing will be inappropriate at a resort town on the Aegean Sea’s and-board costs— early elections—and concluded laundry system adds for some students. All things Turkish coast, I stayed up until that this is all part of a plan by considered, however, this new the early hours of the morning a layer of convenience the relative ease of Erdogan and the AKP to retain system allows some students to watching F-16 fighter jets take power. It’s not that easy. Turkey has to an otherwise do laundry more frequently and paying up-front is off from an airbase in Diyarbakir, been an ally of the U.S. for quite easily than they otherwise would in eastern Turkey. Initial reports almost certainly an a while. Both the United States cumbersome activity. have. stated that all bombings were and Turkey are NATO members, Students still swipe their IDs on Islamic State (IS) targets, in improvement. and with that relationship every dorm on campus, doing to activate machines (except for northern Syria, but it was later comes certain assumptions and laundry has been streamlined, in Riverview, where unreplaced just by sparing them the hassle of announced that the Turkey also expectations. As the conflict against and we believe its student-geared machines must be turned on by reloading URos every few weeks. carried out bombings of the PKK, IS and other related groups in the benefits outweigh its costs. For simply pushing in the coin slots). With its new laundry system, a Kurdish insurgent movement Middle East steps up, increased the majority of UR students, this While students aren’t directly ResLife has ironed the way for operating within Turkey. The partnership by both countries to new laundry system adds a layer charged for each specific load, a improvement to come. PKK has long been recognized as a combat common enemies in the of convenience to an otherwise token amount is deducted from We encourage them to keep terrorist organization by the United region will be vital. Unfortunately, cumbersome activity. an account unaffiliated with the students updated about any States and NATO. Kurds heavily few know the true origins of recent The new washing machines swiper’s URos account. Each changes to pricing or the overall populate Turkey’s southeast, and violent events in Turkey. are more efficient, as they use transaction is associated with its system after observing laundry they make up an estimated 18 A cycle of violence is restarting only around half the water user, and exorbitant card use can traffic and trends. percent of the Turkish population. in Turkey. It desperately needs to Kurdish freedoms were previously be stopped. The above editorials are published with the consent of a majority of the editorial board: Aaron Schaffer (Editor- under heavy restriction by various Schaffer is a member of in-Chief), Julianne McAdams (Managing Editor), Justin Trombly (Opinions Editor), Aurek Ransom (Copy Editor) Turkish governments. These the class of 2016. and Christian Cieri (Illustrator). The Editor-in-Chief and the Editorial Board make themselves available to the UR airstrikes occurred under the community’s ideas and concerns. Email [email protected]. THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / OPINIONS campustimes.org / PAGE 6 Deal or no deal Should we support the deal to disarm a nuclear Iran? Critics’ claims fall flat upon further inspection BY ZACHARY TAYLOR of Nuclear Weapons, other states nuclear sites would be impossible. When not attacking the deal’s for Iran to smuggle arms by will have an incentive to reboot What about unknown enforcement, critics claim the creating black markets. Further, n a surprising twist to the their programs. If the world has nuclear sites? Because no deal will financially bolstermost Iranians are ecstatic to see recent narrative of the U.S. too many nuclear states, it might country would allow foreign Iranian terrorism. The security sanctions lifted, and this means and other powers’ deal be harder to identify a nuclear inspectors unannounced access the government will pay a very withI Iran to limit the latter’s attacker with certainty, withering to every military facility, there Finances are not high domestic political cost if it nuclear weapons program, the any concept of deterrence. The is a process that takes roughly what limit terrorism; provokes the United States or head of a major anti-deal lobbying risk of nuclear war increases two to three weeks by which Israel through brazen terrorism. group, Americans United exponentially as the number of international inspectors can compared to This deal may lead to peaceful Against Nuclear Iran, resigned nuclear powers increases. access undeclared facilities they regime change in Iran, including after reading the controversial The enforcement mechanisms suspect host nuclear activities. conventional military a normalization of relations and deal and deciding that it was, in of this agreement are robust. Before balking at this two week operations, terror is an end to terrorism altogether. fact, worth honoring. Indeed, if The key to understanding the figure, consider the logistics. A Although it is folly to speculate on more people gave thought to the enforcement of the deal is uranium mine can’t be hidden cheap. the timing of major revolutions, it actual content of the deal, they understanding the distinction from satellites, so Iran would is undeniable that the nuclear deal would see that its benefits are between Iran’s declared and somehow have to divert uranium concerns of Israel and Iran’s other is a victory for Iran’s moderates. plenty, and that criticisms of it undeclared nuclear sites. At or plutonium from a source neighbors are legitimate, but It is true that, absent regime often fall flat. declared sites where nuclear the IAEA isn’t monitoring. the deal will not further Iranian change soon, the deal will require This deal prevents Iran from material is mined, enriched or There is only one such source terrorism. renegotiation. Still, this is a step acquiring a nuclear weapon in the bred, Iran will be under constant, in the world—North Korea— Mere finances are not what forward and better than any foreseeable future. If you believe— unannounced monitoring and you can bet intelligence limit terrorism; compared to other option. The international like many of the deal’s critics by the International Atomic agencies will pounce on every conventional military operations, sanctions on Iran were only until several weeks ago—that the Korean ship docking in Iran. terror is cheap. Iran is constrained sustainable because the United Iranian regime is fundamentally This deal prevents Even supposing Iran succeeded by its ability to smuggle arms States’ partners believed us to irrational or otherwise in doing this, it would have and by the threat of retaliation. be making an effort to reach undeterable, you can skip the Iran from acquiring a to build a large underground Even if Iran decides to spend the a diplomatic solution. In the rest of this paragraph. Otherwise, facility involving hundreds of extra cash on terrorism and not long term, they are morally, there are still many reasons nuclear weapon in the people, something it has failed rebuilding its crippled economy, economically and politically to support non-proliferation. foreseeable future. to conceal in the past. Should the deal does not lift the United untenable. A military option The world’s established nuclear the facility be compromised, it States’ targeted economic would only have set back Iran by powers have come close to would be impossible to clean up sanctions on Iranian leaders who a few years and given Iran reason nuclear accidents on a shocking Energy Agency (IAEA). It will tell-tale traces. This would allow support terrorism. Nor does it to pour more resources into its number of occasions. Every coup eliminate most of its enriched the United States to trigger the interfere with the United States nuclear program. or revolution in a nuclear state uranium stockpile for the next 30 “snapback” provision of the deal, and Israel’s ability to target the The other costs of a military gives terrorists and other non- years—although restrictions on reinstating all pre-deal economic flow of arms through other strike are presumably obvious state actors a chance to acquire centrifuges lighten after 15—and sanctions. Thus, if China or means. The deal lifts sanctions to anyone who has read a a nuclear weapon. If Iran follows redesign its one heavy water plant Russia did not want to impose that primarily punish ordinary newspaper since 2003. North Korea in abandoning the so it cannot be used to produce sanctions, this provision would Iranians. Keeping these sanctions Taylor is pursuing a Treaty on the Non-Proliferation plutonium. Cheating at known force them to. may even have made it easier master’s degree in data science.

Negotiated from weakness, deal is destructive

BY JESSE BERNSTEIN I believe President Obama Opponents of this idea Though in the agreement government, in which case a and Secretary Kerry when assert that Russia and other there are red lines that Iran request goes to an arbitration iplomacy can be they say that this was the best nations were also prepared is forbidden from crossing, panel that decides whether an amazing when deal they could’ve gotten, to lift their sanctions, which it seems those lines were inspection can take place. D done correctly. It’s a but my belief is severely would’ve resulted in the same drawn with far too broad a The fact is, this deal will testament to the unwavering tested when neither is willing outcome anyway. brushstroke. For example, pour money into a country ideal of peace that the United to admit that this deal is But, there’s no indication the U.N. will uphold an arms that sponsors terrorist States is even trying to make a seriously, fundamentally that more than a handful embargo on Iran for at least groups, like Hamas and deal with a country like Iran, flawed. of countries were willing the next five years, but that Hezbollah, while also which has been as violently Not only does this deal to end their sanctions, and number can be sanded down funding the Assad regime unhelpful to its own cause disallow the comprehensive now that the deal will end if the International Atomic in Syria, which has killed as one could be. Though the “anytime, anywhere” all sanctions—which means Energy Agency (IAEA) finds thousands of its own people clear goal of the Iran deal is to inspections that would that Iran’s nuclear program and displaced millions more. prevent Iran from acquiring a assure Iran’s compliance, I suppose taking a has remained peaceful. Where The Iranian government nuclear weapon, there also lies but it also sets a dangerous is the specificity there? How has done little to demonstrate an ever-present goal: moving precedent in the Middle leap of faith is part many different ways can that that it’s prepared to take toward long-lasting peace in East. Capitulating to Iran on of diplomacy, but, be interpreted? meaningful steps toward a volatile region more in need multiple key points without Perhaps the most confusing peace and has given no of understanding and patience any semblance of a strong sometimes, the best part of this deal is how it reason to believe it wouldn’t now than ever before. inspection regime, any thing one can do is details the frequency with take steps toward acquiring The actual details of the disclosure of Iran’s history which the IAEA will be able a nuclear weapon when this deal are far more important of uranium enrichment, walk away from the to inspect Iran’s nuclear and deal expires a decade from than any discussions about any commitment to ceasing military facilities. The IAEA now. “war-mongering,” any sponsorship of global terror ledge. will be given free range to A deal is preferable to no televised advertisement for or any release of Americans monitor Iran’s declared deal, but if a good deal is either side or any accusations held captive in Iran endangers the unfreezing of Iranian nuclear sites; but, in order to ever to come, the U.S. needs of being “un-American” lives across the world. assets abroad and the end of inspect their military sites, to know when to walk away (whatever that means). What’s How did we end up with the embargo on Iranian oil, it must go through a process from a bad one. I suppose important is how effective such a raw deal? Most would which has cost the Iranian that could take weeks, ample taking a leap of faith is part of this deal will be in preventing reason that we negotiated government an estimated time to obscure weaponization diplomacy, but, sometimes, Iran from acquiring a nuclear from a position of weakness, $160 billion since 2012— material. Additionally, any the best thing one can do is weapon and taking a major as the declawing of worldwide foreign bodies will have little requests made by the agency walk away from the ledge. step toward building peace in economic sanctions on Iran power to intercede if they to inspect military sites can Bernstein is a member of the region. soothed its desperation. suspect something is afoot. be challenged by the Iranian the class of 2018. THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / FEATURES campustimes.org / PAGE 7 FEATURES Tapingo allows students to tap and go BY ALYSHA ALANI for,” Schauf commented. food quickly. Not necessarily the employees, Schauf noted that “it’s currently not allowed. CONTRIBUTING WRITER Perhaps the most desirable customer service experience,” not adding to anyone’s workload Delivery is another option that You may have heard the name feature of the app is its speed Sroka said. on campus–it’s changing people’s may be on the horizon. Tapingo’s “Tapingo” around campus for those in a hurry. As Schauf However, while some see workload[s].” Though nomarketing associate Emily recently. But what exactly is it? explains, “it’s not going to be a the ‘grab-and-go’ quality of additional staff were hired to deal Rosenbloom confirmed that Tapingo is an app recently social experience. They need to Tapingo as a bonus, others view with Tapingo-related increases market testing via an on-demand brought onto campus in run in and run out.” it as further alienation between in sales, Marketing Manager for delivery team is in place on some partnership with Dining Services Sophomore Deedee Krupkin students and workers. Starbucks Dining Services Kevin Aubrey campuses, a program which has that allows customers to order falls into this demographic. In barista and senior Shenice Morris noted that there are more full- received “a ton of love on social food and drinks, pre-pay using commented, “With an app like time union staff members and media.” Declining, URos or a credit Tapingo, we are losing out on more student labor than in the It’s still too early to tell if Tapingo card and pick up their order human interaction, which is really recent past. If the need arises, will catch on at UR. Dining is at the counter of participating an invaluable good...even when additional staff, and perhaps even closely monitoring its rollout this dining locations: Connections, there are people involved, we still a Tapingo-designated counter, fall for any “rough edges.” Some Pura Vida, Starbucks and The treat them like a machine.” may be added during peak times. concerns from students include Commons. Graduate student Abby Connections student supervisor the app not updating menus with “We wanted to take the next Glogower added, “I am beyond and sophomore Julianna daily offerings or when products step in technology,” Director of skeptical–critical actually–of Kober agrees that “working at are out of stock and longer delays Campus Dining Services and technology that increases a system Connections during busy hours than the estimated wait time. Auxillary Operations Cam Shauf of on-demand labor...all these can be stressful for students and Students also have concerns about said. “It’s clear there are students apps just seem to strive to make employees when the lines get what will happen when the app we weren’t going to reach unless it consuming stuff as easy as possible long. Now, Tapingo saves time for gains popularity. was through their phones.” BRIAN CAPUTO / CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER while limiting human interaction students and hasn’t changed the “It’s silly,” commented senior Schauf said he believes the app and, frankly, encouraging workload for us.” Katharine Boyce. “Lines will be Tapingo is a new app that lets students will increase sales by improving order food on their phone. selfishness.” In terms of services, Aubrey just as long and the orders will get service to clients and attracting On the other hand, Schauf indicated the possibility of a mixed up.” new clientele who previously did addition to the bonus of not believes the app has the potential push-notification system that “If they have a great experience, not have the time to wait in long having to wait in line, Krupkin to improve service relationships. would promote special events or [people] should let us know. If campus lines. likes that “you can see the whole “Because the people that are in deals on campus and the ability to they have a negative experience, So far this year, there has been menu so there’s less pressure a hurry aren’t interested in that order meals with specific dietary they certainly should let us know,” an increase in the number of [when it comes time to order], conversation, and when you mix restrictions at certain locations. Shauf commented. “There is no credit card sales, which likely and it cuts out all of the customer them in the line, it can increase the Customers may soon be able to such thing as a perfect rollout of indicates purchases from graduate service awkwardness.” workload on the people standing place several orders at once, but anything, and so we want to know students, staff and faculty. “And Senior Nikki Sroka sees a there and decrease the time designate just one pick up person what we’re missing so we can fix that’s a market that we haven’t similar customer attitude at they have with each individual which eliminates the need for it.” been doing a very good job of her job as student supervisor in member. ” students to use each other’s IDs Alani is a reaching out and doing things Connections. “People want their In terms of workload for to buy food, a practice that is Take Five Scholar.

BY JODI ARMSTRONG Jodi says: Tips for freshmen fooled into thinking something is and that’s a good thing. You aren’t happens. Please be careful. How 8. Use protection. STIs and CONTRIBUTING WRITER wrong with you, there isn’t. supposed to have everything drunk are you or your partner? If pregnancies are real. Use a Welcome to college, freshmen! 3. There is no “right way” figured out from the get-go. What you’re drunk, how are you going condom, and get tested when I’d like to take some time to feed when it comes to sexuality. You fun would that be? to be able to tell how drunk you you have new partners. Girls you some of my infinite wisdom. can never make everyone happy or your partner is? How would have lots of birth control options 1. I’ll start here: no one has with your sexual choices. There the you feel if you woke up and you including the pill, IUDs and birth infinite wisdom. Friends and will always be someone there to “Sex& didn’t realize whom you had gone control implants. UHS can give upperclassmen will give you lots shame you or to call you a prude, ” home with? If you’re drunk and you more information, and most of advice, but you don’t have to or the opposite. If you’re focused LET SEX & THE CT HELPCT YOU smitten, just get their number. In options are free or affordable. If listen to it all. And, sometimes, on what other people think, you THROUGH YOUR MOST AWKWARD SEXUAL YEARS. the morning ask if they want to you’re concerned about privacy you still have to learn it for will always lose. Instead, focus Netflix and chill while you both and you’re using your parents yourself. Remember, even when on what you want and politely 5. Just as it’s important to recover from your hangovers. insurance, don’t let that stop you feel lost and confused, you remind anyone with unsolicited make decisions for yourself, it’s 7. If you are raped, it is not you. Ask UHS about that, too. know yourself better than anyone advice about how your choices are important to think about the your fault. There are lots of Additionally, UHS does provide else. none of their business. other person, too. Give them a resources. Bathroom stalls on free STI testing. 2. People talk about sex a lot 4. You are allowed to have safe time to say “no.” campus often have sexual assault So, fill the sails of your pirate in college, and it feels like they regret. Sometimes you go home A great line is, “We don’t have hotlines written on them. You can ship and get that booty! And have it all the time. But it is very with someone and it seems like to do anything you don’t want call Public Safety. You can tell a anytime you feel confused or normal to not have sex, and it’s a good idea, but the next day or to, and I won’t be upset if there’s friend or a professor. You can go want to have a laugh, shoot me an very normal to have never had next month or next year you find anything you don’t want to do.” to University Counseling Center, anonymous question at sex. It’s also very normal to not be yourself saying, “I’m embarrassed If you don’t get consent, it is rape. or UCC. They have emergency http://sex-thect.tumblr.com/ask. desperate to change the fact that that I did that.” But it’s okay. You Don’t rape. sessions available, and your first Armstrong is a member of you’ve never done it. Don’t get learn from the things you regret, 6. Drunk sex in college 10 sessions are free. the class of 2016.

UR OPINION “WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE PUT INSTEAD BY BRIAN CAPUTO & TANIMA PODDAR OF THE WEGMANS BUILDING? CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER & FEATURES EDITOR

MADELINE BLACKBURN JASJOT GREWAL ‘16 SAM LEEMAN ‘17 TATE RICHARDS ‘17 ALEXANDER ZAVRIYEV EUKARN ‘18 ‘19 LIENGTIRAPHAN ‘17

“Mock trial court house” “Nothing, I liked [the “Tennis stadium” “Underground parking “Pool table building” “Rock climbing wall” space] open” garage” PAGE 8 / campustimes.org FEATURES / THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 UR Tech: Apple event unveils new tech toys BY PARSA LOTFI quad speaker system with the search capability that searches revolution is Siri. You can have stunning resolution in each PHOTO EDITOR speaker housings built right through all services loaded on this digital assistant search photo, not to mention new Apple announced the year’s into the structure of the iPad. the box. Another advancement for content by actor/actress, video capabilities. Can you say new iPhone on Wednesday, Along with the tablet, Apple is the addition of an App Store director or by giving it vague 4K? The software working with Sept. 9. Lucky for consumers announced an Apple Pencil to the TV. The new remote parameters to search through. photos has also changed to (and Apple’s bank accounts), and smart keyboard. The For example, you could ask allow for an interesting feature they went far and beyond the Apple Pencil is their version of Siri to show you just family- known as Live Photos. Did you new iPhone. We got a neat look a stylus, but it will go beyond friendly shows, or you could ever watch the “Harry Potter” at some revamps of current today’s concept of the stylus ask for animated family shows movies and wish those moving products and an introduction by communicating an idea of that involve a specific voice pictures were real? Well, now to some fresh innovations that pressure and angle to the tablet, actor that was featured in a they are, and Apple insists they promise an exciting year for making the user’s writing and single episode. Siri promises to are not short video clips, but technology. drawing experience much more perform flawlessly. rather extended exposures of One exciting unveiling fluid. The smart keyboard acts Now on to the main event: still photos. It is an interesting was the introduction of the like any bluetooth keyboard the new iPhone. The iPhone concept, and I am excited to new iPad Pro. Chalked up as you’ve used in the past, but 6S and 6S Plus will feature a see what people do with it. the Microsoft Surface’s main it is powered and controlled similar body to the previous The Apple TV and iPad Pro CHRISTIAN CIERI / competitor, the iPad Pro will through a magnetic pin system. ILLUSTRATOR iteration, but will have will be released by November. include a 12.9 inch screen, Next in Apple’s speech was has the standard controls completely revamped internals. For those who have been and will be loaded with the long-awaited revision to that we’re used to, such as One of the most exciting waiting for updates for considerable processing power, the Apple TV. Unfortunately, volume controls, but most of additions is a feature called 3D operating systems, the new iOS courtesy of Apple’s A9X chip. since its last iteration, we the directional controls are Touch which serves to detect will be available in a few weeks, This new device will look like have seen competitors like the operated through a small glass the force with which you press along with pre-orders for the a stretched iPad, but because of Roku3, Amazon FireStick and touch screen. Between this and on the screen to reveal a few iPhone, and the new OS X for unique technological advances, other media streaming boxes, a built-in accelerometer, the new features and shortcuts computers, El Capitan, will be it will be able to serve better in but this newest Apple TV has remote is used like an iPhone for actions users go for most available on Sept. 30, five days place of a laptop, in comparison come back with a vengeance. to control games. In fact, an frequently. after the iPhone is available. with the current iPad lineup. Not only does it contain the iPhone can also be used as a Another interesting update So, keep an eye out! For our audio-inclined readers, features of other boxes, but it game controller. is a change to a 12 megapixel Lotfi is 75004a member of it will have a first-in-class adds Apple’s iTunes, and has a The final addition to this rear camera. This allows for the Class of 2015.

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5021A0058 C24849B Fall B2C Print BROKEN RECORD_10x9.56_nwsprnt_2.indd Cyan Magenta Yellow Black THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / ADVERTISEMENT campustimes.org / PAGE 9 PAGE 10 / campustimes.org ADVERTISEMENT / THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / ADVERTISEMENT campustimes.org / PAGE 11 PAGE 12 / campustimes.org HUMOR / THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 HUMOR A tragedy told in twelve aisles Physicist’s curiosity BY AUSTIN BAILEY perfunctory and emphatic: a was something along the lines of: CONTRIBUTING WRITER riveting salsa of the mundane. “If you ever want to talk about believed to have killed She ended up asking about my chemistry sometime, let me know,” It was almost too perfect for summer research. I managed to and then I’d hand her my number. words. Birds were singing in the ooze a few possibly competent Yeah, that sounded reasonable. Schrodinger’s cat gentle breeze that floated through sentences about carbon nanotubes That might even work. my window as sweetly as the warm in response. But, even despite “Forget a few things?” she asked. summer sun. I lay in bed admiring my apparent incompetence, she Mostly, I had forgotten how to talk PETA demands indictment the Saturday morning, feeling like seemed to like what I had to say. to girls. But then, all at once, time nothing could ever go wrong. But That’s where the trouble really flew by, and, before I knew it, she BY NATE KUHRT before I could even wipe the goofy began. was handing me my receipt. I had HUMOR EDITOR smirk from my face, I tumbled As I walked out, the ideas started to act quickly so I began to blurt headlong into the misadventure of hatching in my head, like the gross out “if you ever want to talk about A box found on the mantle in pass away from unnatural causes. a not-so-thrilling summer. aliens from “Predator”: “She’s chemistry” but made a complete a recent estate sale of the newly- The international impact that this It all started about a week cute!” “She seemed interested!” mess tripping over the “if you deceased, long-lost grandchild of cat had is hard to express in words. beforehand. I’m usually someone Finally, “What if you asked her ever” and had to start again. At Erwin Schrodinger was recently With that in mind, we will seek who keeps to himself, but in me on a date?” that point, she was within seconds put up for auction. Knowing the retribution. By my math, if cats there was a newfound affability When I got back home, I asked of ringing up the next patron, so potential significance, a world have nine lives, he had at least two that led me into a danger zone a friend how he felt about the I quickly added (in a full-blown renowned physicist—who has of those left. Additionally, this previously unknown to man: the situation. And, upon receiving the mumble) “talk about chemistry,” preferred to remain anonymous due will not be the first trial I have won (now) dreaded grocery store gal. response of “100 percent,” I knew and then left my number on the to safety after potential death threats with a ‘curiosity-killed-the-cat’ as So, there I was at Wegmans, what had to be done. So I went table behind her with all the bags from animal rights activists—chose the cause of death. Additionally, collecting foodstuffs, taking up to my room, heart beating out on it and walked away. to purchase the item. there was a 50 percent chance snapchats of the train set that of my ribcage, and scrawled my There was a good chance she The box contained the remains of that it had been dead prior to the glides above the cheese section and phone number onto a piece of didn’t see it. She kind of looked a cat which had been pronounced opening of the box. My team and devastating my shins upon the cold paper. Without a second thought, back and smiled. It was more of a dead Tuesday evening. It has I will look into how the statute of carapace of their shopping carts. I was out the door and returning smile that said “I don’t really like this been concluded that the cat once limitations applies to cat murder. One might say I was living the to Wegmans (a non-negligible job.” But, to make matters worse, belonged to Nobel Prize winner Either way, someone will not dream. But, one can only bump fourteen-minute drive, mind you). I was so disoriented by the whole Erwin Schrodinger. claw their way out of this one.” their shin so many times before At first, I walked around a bit, encounter that I began walking the In response to the half-death The physicist is currently the fun comes to an end. I pulled making sure she was still working, wrong way. If you’ve ever been to of the cat, People for the Ethical frustrated that everyone seems into an empty cashier lane on that and I noted how busy her register the East Avenue Wegmans, you Treatment of Animals (PETA) to be ignoring the fact that the fateful day, and there she was. was. But I couldn’t just go up to know that there’s only one exit. released a statement regarding cat was originally poisoned. Thin, black hair, and a set her­—I needed to make it look And, if you start walking the wrong its opinion on the topic, stating He is currently searching for of bangs that could pull your natural. So I grabbed some things way at the cash registers, you need that “we at PETA are absolutely veterinary experts to testify that heartstrings so hard, you’d think that I only sort of needed: a bag of to circumambulate the entire store outraged at the animal cruelty it is impossible for a cat to live you’d just got rejected from Vassar apples and a box of granola bars. in order to not look like an idiot. shown by [Name Retracted],” “It to 100 in a box without food; College again. She looked like a Yes, those two items would be the But, it was okay; I looked like an is so sad to see the life of an animal he has yet to be successful. It more down-to-earth version of ones to set her heart aflame. Finally, idiot anyway. I drove home in a cut short by science. We will see is suspected that he will be Zooey Deschanel, for anyone the time struck, and I made my lot of shame after that. She didn’t to it that justice is brought forth represented legally by the same out there who hasn’t suffered that entrance. It wasn’t until after I had even call me. to [Name Retracted].” attorney who defended Michael particular brand of Poughkeepsie loaded my apples and granola bars Whatever. Like I care, Claire. The New York’s Office State Vick in 2007. heartache. onto the belt that I realized I had Bailey is a member of Attorney commented, “It is Kuhrt is a member of The small talk was both no idea what I was going to say. It the class of 2017. heartbreaking to see this feline the class of 2017. Cold war heats up Tapingo creates BY SCOTT here at the UR, the student halls of the Staybridge Suites aura of confusion MISTLER-FERGUSON body possesses the mental and until their unavoidable removal. BY JULIANNE McADAMS agree on a name—a split in CONTRIBUTING WRITER physical fortitude to sneak Off campus residents seem MANAGING EDITOR nomenclature. Ah, the freedom. into their suitemate’s room at above the fray for now, but But, at what cost? Clearly, Temperatures met a universal 2 a.m., unplug their fan and they forget that their car’s Tapingo, the new app that Tapingo has formed a house high this summer with July as whisk it away to enjoy a slightly airconditioning unit will make allows students to order divided. UR student employees the hottest month in recorded more comfortable snooze until them targets as well. menu items online before have been heard arguing the history, as well for the University retaliation hits. There have been silver linings picking them up in person, pronunciation in hushed tones of Rochester; students are still Luckily, the bright young amidst this mayhem. New types has presented pronunciation that have escalated to disruption. struggling with the deadly minds that fill this University of idiotic challenges have arisen problems around campus. One Connections employee heat. Naive freshmen who are not only capable of theft in the form of “Sweat Lodges,” “To-pay-and-go,” one student reportedly stormed out, brought only one fan and deception. In fact, the most as one student referred to said quickly. “Topay-andgo.” refusing to distribute orders to along with their creative and ingenious methods them, where students brave the “Topayn-go.” “Ta-payngo.” customers who came in asking laundry hampers, hottest zones of the Stacks, Hill “Tapingo.” “Get it?! Because for their “Tap-ang-o” breakfast flat screen TVs Court and even you pay, and then you go!” sandwich. When the same and cheap buildings in A more popular pronunciation employee was asked to talk in fridges are the Quad in of this new marvel is “Tap- more detail about the “‘Tap- now paying a competition ‘n-go,” or a shortened, “tap ang-o’ breakfast sandwich” the price. for who can and go.” Because, similarly incident, he declined to respond. As fan wars survive the to the above, you “tap”, and Those customers had to resort break out longest then you “go”. Other spoken to asking the people behind over the before solutions include “Ta-pang-o”, the counter to hand them the meager high- or, of course, “Tapanga”. sandwich, adding a much dreaded supply of tailing it Upon further investigation, step to the consumer experience. cooling machinery, this back to a a tweet from the Lousiana Whether it’s a play on / CONTRIBUTING ILLUSTRATOR reporter has seen a peaceful MEGAN MEHRING freezing cold State University Student tapping and going, paying campus turned into a sweaty of warding off this heat wave shower. Union prompts the question and going, or some mixture of nightmare. are being implemented all over Even better than these of pronunciation to Tapingo the two, I think we can expect Fearful students cram campus. challenges is the recognition itself, to which representatives students for years to come to themselves into their own Students have taken to that this heat helps us forget the responded, “It was born as grapple with this distinction. fridges for some relief, professors replacing their mattresses with eight months of frozen winter ‘tapingo,’ but it’s 50/50 here Open forums hosted by suspend classes in any room ice packs. Athletes fake simple we’re headed for. For soon in the office. We’ll let you UR Dining Services will be above the third floor, and, of injuries before their seasons begin enough, the heat stroke will decide [smiley-face emoji].” tasked with choosing a side, course, everyone is stealing fans. in order to use the fabled ice bath. end and the ice age will begin. It appears that even Tapingo’s perhaps with dire consequences. Airconditioning units are The bravest have been known to Mistler-Ferguson is a member of corporate staff cannot McAdams is a member of not easily snatched away, but congregate in the air conditioned the class of 2018. the class of 2017. THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / A&E campustimes.org / PAGE 13 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT Bill Nye challenges students to ‘change the world’

BY SAM PASSANISI Nye’s status as a man of many Nye attributed this to a number space probes. lobbied for the New Horizons NEWS EDITOR talents. In early 2014, he cemented of factors, including a growing Nye had more than just serious mission to Pluto, Nye also his reputation as a champion population, deforestation and the topics to discuss, of course, fitting his referenced the unpopular decision The students started to chant of scientific thought when he burning of fossil fuels, such as the role as the man who made science by the International Astronomical his name before he entered the debated evolution against Ken extraction of oil from the tar sands fun for a generation of students. Union to declassify Pluto as a planet. room, before the lights had Ham, the founder of the Creation region in western Canada. Nye During the beginning of his speech, He doesn’t feel sentimental for the begun to dim in the auditorium. Museum in Kentucky. Nye is also also criticized politicians such as Nye related his family history, former ninth planet in the Solar He bounded out onto the stage the CEO of the Planetary Society, Florida governor Rick Scott, who, including his father’s fascination system, though. “Instead of being from the wings, with a loose, spry a non-governmental advocacy Nye said, prohibits members of his with sundials and his membership the last of the traditional planets, I gait and the boundless energy group founded in 1980 by the administration from using the term in the North American Sundial want Pluto to be the first of a new of a much younger Science late astronomer Carl Sagan to “climate change.” Society. Nye lightly mocked the class of objects—the Plutoids!” Nye Guy. He looks older now—60 encourage and lobby for space “We have a lot of science deniers group for their geeky fascination exclaimed, to laughter and applause years this November—but to exploration. Indeed, Bill Nye seems in the U.S.,” Nye said. He went on with the archaic timekeeping from the audience. the Yellowjackets in Strong to be following in Sagan’s footsteps to charge the students in attendance devices, facetiously commenting Over the course of the evening’s Auditorium on Saturday night, in more ways than one. Along with to work on problems of alternative that sundial enthusiasts party even talk, Nye was nothing if not he was twenty years younger, the astrophysicist Neil Degrasse Tyson, energy­—not only wind and solar harder than accountants. Ned Nye passionate. You could tell, for zany, wild-about-science host of an Nye is one of the most recognizable power, but also electrical storage and was the inventor of the “sand-dial,” a instance, that climate change deniers TV show that was last on the air voices advocating for scientific transmission. He described cutting- portable sundial that could be taken and young-Earth creationists make when UR’s current senior class was skepticism, awareness of climate edge liquid metal batteries, which to the beach so that the user could him hopping mad. Likewise, when in preschool. change and space exploration in can operate at higher temperatures avoid getting sand in his or her he talked about space exploration Bill Nye is a cultural touchstone America. than traditional alkaline batteries watch. He turned his invention into and the wonders that await the for ‘90s kids who remember One main point of Nye’s speech and carbon nanotube power a family enterprise that Nye joked human race on Mars and beyond, watching his show in science class, was the rising level of carbon lines, allowing for faster and more made them “dozens of dollars.” He his excitement was contagious. but he’s more than just a childhood dioxide in Earth’s atmosphere, efficient transmission of electricity. admitted, however, that his father’s “While we are solving climate hero now. In fact, he’s enjoyed which recently surpassed 0.04 If someone figures out how to hobby had an effect on him; when change, we have to keep looking a resurgence in recognition and percent. Although admittedly a implement these technologies, Nye Nye was consulted on the design up,” Nye said. “We have to keep popularity in the last few years. small number, even the incremental said, they would “...dare I say it— of the Spirit and Opportunity exploring.” In 2013, he was a contestant on increase of carbon dioxide and change the world!” This became Mars rovers, he convinced the If we can manage to do that, we Dancing with the Stars, where other greenhouse gasses contribute something of a refrain during other engineers to turn a photo- might just—dare I say it—change he danced the cha-cha to Oingo- to climate change. July 2015, Nye the speech, punctuating Nye’s calibration instrument on the rovers the world. Boingo’s “Weird Science.” Despite pointed out, was the hottest month exuberant outbursts on everything into a working “MarsDial.” Passanisi is a member of being voted off the show after worldwide since records began to from electric cars and carbon taxes After relating the story of how the class of 2017. three episodes, the stint proved be kept in the 1880s. to Martian rovers and the Voyager the Planetary Society successfully Summer, ‘From #Ferguson’ summons art from ashes BY DAVID LIBBEY in music CONTRIBUTING WRITER BY JESSE BERNSTEIN Now more than ever, America CONTRIBUTING WRITER is grappling with its history of violence and oppression towards Beach House, ‘Depression people of color. Last week, the Cherry’: The Baltimore duo’s Hartnett Gallery opened its first fifth album eschews the dramatic exhibition of the year, entitled drums of their earlier efforts while “From #Ferguson,” featuring retaining the theatricality of their works by Bryce Olen Robinson. sound. Victoria Legrand’s voice has A native of Ferguson, Missouri, never been stronger, and Alex Scally Robinson’s work speaks to the has been given some freedom to racism that he has seen and the play with some aggression, a word consequences it has had for him rarely identified with Beach House. and the nation at-large. Everything is bolstered by the organ To understand Robinson’s art, sounds that make this album so you must understand its context. distinctive. Highlights: “Space Robinson grew up in Ferguson, Song,” “Sparks,” “Days of Candy.” went to college in Chicago and Kamasi Washington, ‘The Epic’: returned to St. Louis to attend The man responsible for the tenor graduate school at Washington saxophone on Kendrick Lamar’s University. It is there that the “To Pimp a Butterfly” released his direction of his art changed debut solo album this May, brazenly drastically, when one day he drove titled “The Epic.” The album lives around looking for inspiration. DAVID LIBBEY / CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER up to its name—the expansive sonic He eventually found himself in The exhibit “From #Ferguson” features the works of Bryce Olen Robinson. It runs through Sept. 27th. scope and sometimes-cumbersome Kinloch, a suburb of St. Louis new meaning in his art. As he Other pieces are more city and damaged a community, length combine to create something adjacent to Ferguson and the first explained, “I had always wanted to conceptual, such as “#Ferguson” but left the ground ready to be that pays homage to jazz of the past African-American community in make work about my home, about (2014), a massive wooden map of reseeded and for new life to grow. while also happening to be very Missouri. Robinson researched racism, about the structure of St. Ferguson on which are branded Last year, thanks to the work accessible. Highlights: “Change of the history of the city and Louis. I always wished I could talk hash signs by, as Robinson of many, the issues that Michael the Guard,” “Henrietta Our Hero,” found that, despite systematic about it. I didn’t wish for this.” specifies, “people who have never Brown’s death brought to light “Re Run Home.” oppression, it was a prosperous Some of the pieces in “From been there.” An influx of national came to this campus, when student Tame Impala, ‘Currents’: Tame community until the 1980s, #Ferguson” are artifacts of the attention quickly changed how activists raised their voices against Impala has always teetered on the when it rapidly fell into decline. riots, like “Prime Beauty” (2015), Michael Brown’s death was racial injustice in the United States. edge of being really interesting. After spending many months in a neon sign from a makeup store perceived, producing positive Bryce Olen Robinson joins that “Innerspeaker” and “Lonerism” are Kinloch, he built relationships that was looted and razed. Next to and negative consequences. If the chorus, revealing to every student both good albums, but it’s on this with locals and ran a children’s the sign is an AP photograph—one story had not received so much the more and less obvious effects new effort that Kevin Parker really day camp for three summers. of many that were published— attention, Robinson said, “I don’t of racism. But his work, whether brings it all together. It’s an album Following graduate school, of it lying ironically among the think it would have burned.” intentionally or not, urges us to do of contradictions, really. Is it rock? Is his next project was to create a rubble. By taking the sign from the But he said he also realizes how something about it, to not stand it EDM? How can it sound at once sculpture park in Ferguson, which debris, Robinson hoped to reclaim Ferguson has come to signify so by and let it continue. mechanical and also dream-like? opened in June 2014, just two a piece of Ferguson that had been much more to the nation and the “From #Ferguson” runs through This is the band Tame Impala has months before Michael Brown distorted by the media, giving the world. In that way, “#Ferguson” is Sept. 27. been working toward becoming. was shot and killed on Aug. 9. residents back a little bit of their an ambiguous piece, acutely aware Libbey is a member of SEE SUMMER PAGE 14 Suddenly, Robinson found a own voice. of how fire has burned through the the class of 2016. PAGE 14 / campustimes.org A&E / THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 ‘The End of the Tour’ adds humanity to an enigma BY JULIANNE McADAMS Jesse Eisenberg, who plays unbearable. makes the fact that there is a movie of the thematic consistencies of his MANAGING EDITOR Lipsky, delivers a realistic, nuanced “I think if the book is about about him problematic). writing. Part of the beauty of the performance as someone who, with anything, it’s about ‘why?’ Why am What really makes the film film is the simulated encounter with “The End of the Tour,” based on all of the gray area of real life, is I doing it, and what is so American unique, though, is how relatable this illusive man; it was J.D. Salinger David Lipsky’s book “Although of hard to like, but redeemable in his about what I’m doing?” Wallace , these self-aware diatribes are. For who wrote, “What really knocks me Course You End Up Becoming intentions. The bond that forms portrayed by Jason Segel, says in the any of us who have ever second- out is a book that, when you’re all Yourself: A Road Trip with David between the two men is endearing film. “I think that if there’s a sort of guessed a text message, over-edited a done reading it, you wish the author Foster Wallace,” illustrates Lipsky’s until we are jarred by a shot of a tape sadness for people under 45, it has Facebook profile or felt like everyone that wrote it was a terrific friend of experience interviewing David recorder, or a question that brings us something to do with pleasure, and was watching us when walking yours and you could call him up on Foster Wallace while on a five-day into Lipsky’s perspective as a career achievement, and entertainment. across campus, Wallace’s concerns the phone whenever you felt like it.” book tour for Wallace’s colossal, journalist who needs “the story” Like a sort of emptiness at the heart are not far from home. The film makes the argument footnote-filled novel, “Infinite Jest.” (when Lipsky asks about Wallace’s of what they thought was going on.” Segel’s ability to act the sensitive, that to read Wallace’s writing, or The film begins with Lipsky in suicide watch or rumors of heroin Each scene is largely consumed out-there kind of guy fits Wallace’s anyone’s, for that matter, is to be 2008, when he receives the news addiction, to name a few). We lose by the analytical, introspective and insecurities and sense of isolation. stuck inside their head. Part of the of Wallace’s suicide. The majority track of what is genuine, and what self-aware dialogue of Wallace as Likewise, Eisenburg successfully consolation of “The End of the of the film is then a flashback to 12 is the interview. he interacts with a person who he plays the smart, ambitious and Tour” is the feeling that maybe, years prior: Lipsky is a thirty-year-old “The End of the Tour” addresses, considers to be a great danger to his sometimes off-putting young through Lipsky’s memoir, we are novelist and writer for Rolling Stone through Wallace’s reflection of control—Lipsky has the power to Lipsky. looking back into the less-fictional who is approaching the tour as not his own work, what it is to be represent Wallace in whatever way Although it isn’t necessary to have materialization of Wallace’s mind. only a job, but a chance to come “American,” and how so-called he wishes, and what Wallace wants read any Wallace before seeing “The McAdams is a member of face-to-face with someone he idolizes. “average” life can become, for some, is not to be represented at all (which End of the Tour,” it helps to be aware the class of 2017. ‘Rick and Morty’ returns Best music of summer 2015 BY JESSE BERNSTEIN teenage angst and insecurities are FROM SUMMER PAGE 13 play. Her lyrics betray a sincerity a little scared. And, yeah, Chance CONTRIBUTING WRITER on display; and Morty’s mother, Highlights: “Let it Happen,” that’s tough to find in most has a couple of real nice verses, Beth (voiced by Sarah Chalke), is “Nangs,” “The Less I Know the modern rock, which is as refreshing too. Highlights: “Nothing Came Animation can let thoughts and constantly asking herself between Better.” as it is interesting. A truly powerful to Me,” “Slip Slide,” “Sunday ideas get to some really strange places glasses of wine if she’s with her Jamie xx, ‘In Colour’: “Fun as and affecting album. Highlights: Candy.” that would be otherwise restricted husband Jerry (voiced by Chris hell” is the best way to describe “Horseshoe Crabs,” “Waitress,” Titus Andronicus, ‘The in a more realistic dramatic form, Parnell) because she loves him or Jamie xx’s debut album “In “Happy to See Me.” Most Lamentable Tragedy’: like live-action television or theater. if it’s because she got pregnant in Colour.” Though his songs tend Thundercat, ‘The Beyond/ If a 29-track, 93-minute rock When anything you want to do is high school. It’s heady stuff. to follow a pretty similar pattern Where the Giants Roam’: opera about a man who runs visually possible, the scope of ways Part of the beauty of modern (tense beats build on another until 16 minutes—that’s how long into his doppelganger before to approach a particular subject television is that you can find great the whole becomes greater than this album is. Stephen Bruner, going on a life-changing journey expands exponentially. content anywhere if you’re willing the sum of its parts, and then it also known as Thundercat, has that also works as a metaphor That’s part of what makes Adult to look. And, it is indeed a modern all peters out after that), the xx popped up on a lot great albums for manic depression is your Swim’s “Rick and Morty” so show—there’s an active subreddit producer’s solo effort is a party the last few years (“To Pimp a thing, then, yeah, this album is incredible. “Rick and Morty,” a dedicated to the show, where album that you can listen to on Butterfly,” “You’re Dead!” and the for you. Highlights: “Come On, micro-budget show that averages Roiland and Harmon sometimes your own. Highlights: “Gosh,” aforementioned “The Epic”), but Siobhán,” “A Pair of Brown Eyes,” around 2 million viewers per participate in discussions. “Obvs,” “Sleep Sound.” this is first solo effort that’s really “Stranded.” week, follows the adventures of Episodes have been released on Vince Staples, ‘Summertime broken through. It’s nostalgic, Destroyer, ‘Poison Season’: mad scientist Rick Sanchez as he Instagram, catchphrases have ‘06’: Of all the solo albums to it’s heartbreaking, it’s hopeful, Ten albums into his “side- bitterly and drunkenly whisks his been turned into merchandise come out of the Odd Future and again, it’s only 16 minutes. project,” Destroyer, also known grandson Morty through parallel within a week and the amount universe, this one may be the Highlights: “Them Changes,” as Dan Bejar, has perfected what universes. The comedy is sick of fan art dedicated to the show best. Staples’ lyrical dexterity is “Lone Wolf and Cub.” exactly Destroyer can be. The and self-referential, and Rick’s is staggering. Every week, people something to behold; he weaves Donne Trumpet and the poetry of his lyrics, his uniquely and Morty’s mishaps often end in respond to the imperfections of a tale of fear and excitement over Social Experiment, ‘Surf’: reedy voice and the dreaminess grotesquely-rendered death. these characters; they respond the nearly hour-long album to “You mean the Chance album?” of the music combine to create a The ways in which series creators to their flaws, to their mistakes devastating effect. The 22 year old Not exactly. Though he features specific sound that’s explored and Dan Harmon and Justin Roiland and to their regrets. But what has a bright future. Highlights: prominently on the album, make inverted with each new album. explore big, heavy questions keeps people coming back is the “Norf Norf,” “Lift Me Up,” no mistake: this is a team effort. Though “Poison Season” isn’t through a mixture of comedy, sci- show’s assertion that life’s ultimate “Jump Off the Roof.” Donnie Trumpet, Busta Rhymes, the masterpiece that 2011’s fi and stoner philosophy is unique meaninglessness can be mitigated Hop Along, ‘Painted Shut’: Eryakh Badu, Big Sean, Nate “Kaputt” was, it’s another strong on television. In order to tackle by surrounding yourself with Lead singer Francis Quinlan’s voice Fox—everyone on this album is effort. Highlights: “Dream Lover,” concepts like love as ownership people you love who are as messed is one of the more unique ones heard. “Surf” is an album that “Bangkok,” “Midnight Meet the and the general feeling of human up and weird as you are. you’ll ever hear. Over ten songs, understands peaks and valleys, Rain.” loneliness, the episode “Auto Bernstein is a member of her throaty howl is as much of an bringing the vibe from way up Bernstein is a member of Erotic Assimilation” introduced the class of 2018. instrument as anything you could high back down to reflective and the class of 2018. a past lover for Rick (voiced by Roiland) named “Unity” who takes on the form of entire planets’ populations. In confronting questions about the meaning (or lack thereof) of existence, the episode “Rixty Minutes” shows Morty (also voiced by Roiland), telling his sister: “Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everybody’s gonna die... come watch TV?” Existentialist sentiments like these aren’t generally associated with cartoons that take shots at narrative conventions of sci-fi and other commercial entertainment. Part of it comes from Harmon’s influence. The “Community” creator created a similar tone on the best episodes of that show, but something about the animation and Roiland’s talent has made “Rick and Morty” into something a little more. This season in particular, the show has matured greatly. Each episode combined the show’s sense of humor with emotional depth that (you’ll excuse me for this) gives a bunch of 2-D characters a fleshed-out feel. Rick’s bitterness and alcoholism are constantly referenced and explored; Morty’s THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / SPORTS campustimes.org / PAGE 15 ATHLETE OF THE WEEK Lee Stagg - Women’s Soccer BY DANIELLE DOUGLAS that put the game into overtime – player and think she has been SPORTS EDITOR and eventually double overtime? playing incredibly well. I also look Scoring against Union was up to my dad because he has been Stagg, a junior, is a midfielder probably the greatest feeling I’ve giving me professional advice and forward on the women’s soccer had after scoring a goal for UR since I was six years old – advice team. Although she was injured for women’s soccer. We lost to them that has truly helped my game. much of last season, she was named to last year, so to tie it up, especially This year, UR women’s soccer the 2014 UAA All-Academic team. with a 25-yard goal, was crazy. I am has 11 new freshmen. How In Saturday’s game against Union also a lefty, and scoring with my does having such a young College, Stagg netted the goal that put right foot definitely crossed out roster impact the team? the game into an intense overtime. one of my many goals on my list. Having such a young roster What is your favorite part with 11 new freshmen on the When did you first get of playing soccer at UR? team means that the team has involved in playing soccer? My favorite part about playing the ability to grow immensely I first got involved with soccer soccer at UR is the people in a short amount of time. when I moved from Ecuador I’ve met. I love the sport, and I also believe that they are to Boca Raton, Fla. when I was having my best friends on the great players and bring fresh six years old. My dad told my team makes it that much better. and new energy to our team. two older sisters that he signed PHOTO COURTESY OF UR ATHLETICS Who do you look up to the Would you rather play FIFA with them up to play that year. I Stagg hustles down the field after returning from ACL tear. most to improve your game? Donald Trump or Amy Schumer? asked for him to sign my twin I love playing on the field We can read what each other is It is hard to choose one person I would rather play sister and me up as well, and I with Kim. Especially since I trying to do, so it is very easy to who I look up to the most when FIFA with Amy Schumer have been playing ever since. have torn my ACL twice, I have play and connect passes with her. it comes to improving my game. because she’s a clown! What is it like playing on the realized how fluid it is when we How did you feel after scoring I look up to [my sister] Kim Douglas is a member of field with your twin sister, Kim? play together at the same time. the goal against Union College because I respect her a lot as a the class of 2017. LAST WEEK'S SCORES FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 4 • Women’s Volleyball vs SUNY Cordland - W 3-0 SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 5 • Field Hockey vs Oberlin College - W 6-1 • Women’s Volleyball vs Lebanon Valley College - L 2-3 • Men’s Soccer vs Rutgers-Newark - W 2-1 (OT) • Women’s Soccer vs Union College - T 1-1 (OT) SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 6 • Field Hockey vs Denison University - W 2-0 • Men’s Soccer vs Morrisville State College - T 0-0 (OT) WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 9 • Women’s Soccer vs Buffalo State - W 2-1 (OT) CHRISTIAN CIERI / ILLUSTRATOR National League Central: THIS WEEK'S SCHEDULE better than ever FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 11 BY JESSE BERNSTEIN strength of one of the best pitching • Women’s Volleyball vs Houghton College - 6:00 P.M.* CONTRIBUTING WRITER staffs in recent memory, which • Women’s Volleyball vs St. John Fisher College - 8:00 P.M.* is devoid of any big names. As the MLB regular season starts Finally, the Pirates have found SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 12 to wind down, the full extent of the production from every member of • Men’s Golf at Flower City NCAA Preview - Day 1 - Penfield, NY - 8:00 A.M. performances by clubs and their their lineup, and Gerrit Cole has • Women’s Tennis at William Smith College Mary Hosking Invitational - Day 1 - Geneva, NY - 8:00 A.M. players can be put into perspective. truly become the ace that Pittsburgh Outliers can be discovered, trends expected him to become when • Men’s Tennis at St. Lawrence University Fall Classic - Day 1 - Canton, NY - 9:00 A.M. can be pointed out and bodies they drafted him first overall in • Women’s Volleyball vs SUNY Geneseo - 11:00 A.M.* of work can be appreciated 2011. Put all of that together, and in full. After a long season of you’re looking at a division that • Field Hockey vs New Paltz - 12:00 P.M.* speculation and prediction, it’s lays claim to three of the four best • Women’s Volleyball vs Oswego - 1:00 P.M.* nice to have some certainty. records in baseball up to this point. According to STATS LLC, • Football vs Catholic University of America - Washington, D.C. - 1:00 P.M. One thing that no one was certain about at the beginning of that has only happened twice • Men’s Soccer vs Hobart College - 4:00 P.M. the season was the NL Central since divisional play began in 1969. The 1978 AL East had SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 13 division: How would the Cubs fare under Joe Maddon, and how the eventual champion Yankees • Men’s Golf at Flower City NCAA Preview - Day 2 - Penfield, NY - 8:00 A.M. would they incorporate all of winning out over the Red Sox • Women’s Tennis at William Smith College Mary Hosking Invitational - Day 2 - Geneva, NY - 8:00 A.M. their stud prospects? How long (yes, that was the year of Bucky can the Cardinals continue to Dent) and a Brewers club that • Men’s Tennis at St. Lawrence University Fall Classic - Day 2 - Canton, NY - 9:00 A.M. trot out nobodies that become featured mustache aficionado • Field Hockey vs Utica College - Utica, NY - 1:00 P.M. somebodies? Will the Pirates Robin Yount. Five years later, the • Women’s Soccer vs Montclair State University - Montclair, NY - 1:00 P.M. turn out to be too top heavy? AL East once again had three of All of those questions were the top four record. It consisted of TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 15 answered this season. The Cubs the Yankees, Tigers and another • Men’s Soccer vs Buffalo State College - Buffalo, NY - 4:00 P.M. are on pace to win 94 games, eventual champion, in Orioles. which will be their highest total Those two instances came at a time • Women’s Volleyball vs The College at Brockport - 7:00 P.M.* since 2008. The kids, from Kris when there were two fewer teams WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 16 Bryant to Kyle Schwarber, have and there were only four divisions. Now, there are 30 teams and six • Field Hockey vs Ithaca College - Ithaca, NY - 5:00 P.M. all performed better than could have been expected, playing and divisions, which makes this year’s *DENOTES HOME GAME acting like veterans from day one. NL Central even more impressive. Here’s to an absolute (DH) DENOTES DOUBLEHEADER The Cardinals have, once again, overcome injury after bloodbath of a playoffs. injury to post the best record Bernstein is a member of in baseball, largely behind the the class of 2018. PAGE 16 / campustimes.org THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2015 / SPORTS SPORTS Men’s soccer clinches first season win in OT An inspiration at the U.S. Open

BY EMILY LEWIS BY BEN SHAPIRO from the sport during his peak by his CONTRIBUTING WRITER SENIOR STAFF illness and anxiety. And at this year’s Open, he did exactly that, playing in the men’s singles event one last During the first round of With the U.S. Open in full time, winning his first round match UR’s annual Flower City swing, the biggest attention- and leading 19th ranked Feliciano Classic, the UR men’s soccer grabber, without question, is Serena Lopez before his body, which has team defeated Rutgers Williams’ quest to complete the not been subjected to the typical University-Newark 2-1 in a “Grand Slam”–the exceptionally training of a professional athlete for highly-contested overtime rare feat in tennis of winning all four quite some time, started cramping game on Friday. of the biggest tournaments in one in the hot New York sun. Lopez Junior midfielder Michael year. Despite the deserved attention even admitted that Fish was the Cross netted the winning goal for Serena, one person who won’t be better player and deserved to win. during an intense overtime lifting any trophies at the end of the The results don’t really matter period, tallying his first goal event was perhaps more successful though. Just stepping onto the Sophomore Ryosei Kobayashi stretches to save a ball. of the season. than anyone. court was a victory in itself “The team fought really hard Only three years ago, Mardy Fish for Fish. The American to gut out the win,” senior and was on a roll as the top-ranked displayed center-back Michael Sergeant American male, playing the impressive courage said. The key to the team’s best tennis of his life and to open up about success, Sergeant continued, getting set to take on Roger his mental battles, was that many players of all Federer in the U.S. Open despite the stigma attached class years stepped up their fourth round. Shortly to it. Professional athletes, performances to contribute. before the match particularly tennis players, are The first half remained began, though, often lauded for their mental scoreless as both teams Fish announced strength in the face of adversity, struggled offensively to start he was pulling and for Fish to reveal his off the game. In the first 45 out of the struggles was an extremely brave minutes, there were nine PHOTO COURTESY OF RUAIRI CONWAY tournament move. total shots on goal among the Junior Michael Cross goes up for a header during the championship game Furthermore, his participation two teams. UR senior and against Morrisville State. also serves as a reminder that goalkeeper Marshal Davidson pushed the game into overtime. In the championship game MORGAN MEHRING / CONTRIBUTING ILLUSTRATOR mental illnesses can be grabbed three saves during the The ‘Jackets came out strong of the tournament, UR managed, and that with the first half alone. to begin the overtime period. proceeded to tie Morrisville for “health reasons.” right treatment—Fish still takes Junior midfielder Ben During the seventh minute, State (0-0) in double overtime. Between that day and now, Fish medication for his anxiety—people Swanger gained the Cross scored a header off an Sophomore goalkeeper Redd has opened up about what exactly can do what they love. momentum early in the assist from sophomore Samuel Brown recorded seven saves was going on, revealing that he faced The word hero is often mentioned second half by scoring his Cekala. After only scoring during the Morrisville State a problem that caused his heart to when it comes to the world’s top first goal of the season at one goal during regulation matchup. race uncontrollably at seemingly tennis players. Although the feats of the 54 minute mark. He was time, “scraping our way back The ‘Jackets will compete random times. This issue would the sport’s top athletes deserve praise, assisted by senior Tyler Buck into the game was extremely at Hobart College in Geneva lead to crippling anxiety attacks that Mardy Fish truly embodies a hero. and freshman Milan Fatschel. rewarding,” Buck said. this coming Saturday, where would make him fearful of leaving His courage to publicly share his Less than five minutes later, Buck continued to say that they will be seeking their first his house or being alone for any struggles and triumphs in his battle Rutgers-Newark’s sophomore defeating Rutgers was a big win conference win of the season. period of time. with illness and mental struggles forward Atubi Chigozie for the ‘Jackets. “It will really Their next home game will be While Fish understandably took serve as a tremendous reminder to responded with a goal assisted give [us] some momentum as Sept. 22 against the St. John time away from tennis, he never everyone, not just athletes or fans, by sophomore Isaiah Kuris. we gear up towards the rest of Fisher College Cardinals. gave up the hope that he would be that these sicknesses can be overcome. No further goals were scored the regular season,” Sergeant Lewis is a member of able to end his career on his own Shapiro is a member of during regulation, which added. the class of 2016. terms, instead of being ripped away the class of 2016. A glimpse into the upcoming NFL season

BY JESSE BERNSTEIN field for him (not to mention 4. Adrian Peterson is going Le’Veon Bell is the best running should be even more explosive. CONTRIBUTING WRITER a lingering hamstring injury) to have a monster year: the back in football. Once he Don’t be surprised to could spell some serious issues last time Adrian Peterson had returns from suspension, see Big Ben raising for Shady McCoy this season. a year off, he rushed for 2,000 a Steelers offense that trophy number At long last, the great yards in the next season. He was top-10 last year three this expanse is behind us: the rocky 2. The Rams will make the wasn’t even injured February. and unforgiving terrain of playoffs: the last time the Rams this time, although Bernstein is a Tom Brady updates, fantasy made the playoffs, “Everybody his reputation member of football drafts and breathless Loves Raymond” was still on certainly was. Look the class of training camp reports (“He’s TV and the song “Hollaback for him to ruin a 2018. added 25 pounds of muscle!”) Girl” didn’t exist. What have lot of linebacker’s have been traversed, and here they been up to this whole days this season. we stand at the precipice of time? Mostly incompetence, another NFL season. Will the but there’s reason to believe 5. Jameis Winston is going Patriots repeat as champions? that this year’s squad, with to be more successful than Will J.J. Watt continue his their stellar defensive line and Marcus Mariota: the quality of reign of dominance? How exciting options on offense weapons that Jameis has at his will the Packers fare without (don’t sleep on Todd Gurley), disposal (Mike Evans, Vincent Jordy Nelson? Let’s make some could end the drought. Jackson, Doug Martin, a predictions. potentially great defense) is far 3. This is Jay Cutler’s final superior than those of Mariota 1. LeSean McCoy will season in Chicago: I’m a Jay (Kendall Wright, Bishop be hugely disappointing: Cutler defender, but there’s Sankey, an old sock). Alhough coming off of a season in which just too much negativity Mariota still has a chance to be he was handed the ball over around his current position just as good if not better than 300 times for the second year and not enough talent for him Winston in the future, it’s not in a row, McCoy is looking to to make it through this season going happen this year. reestablish himself as a premier either intact or having accrued back in Buffalo. However, a enough good will to get another 6. The Pittsburgh Steelers so-so offense and a lack of any year at Soldier Field. will win the Super Bowl: passing threat to open up the make no mistake, as of today, CHRISTIAN CIERI / STAFF ILLUSTRATOR