\ ..

Four page pull­ out Frosh special! .. pages 11-14 Friday, September 7, 1984 No student loss ' Library changes complete • by Bruce Arculus

has introduced a After a year that has seen picketers, delays, to Laurier to help noise, confusion, and even a suicide attempt safety and f'e9uce the from an uncompleted floor, the library violent attacks. The addition consisting of two floors is finally been named SAFE. complete. Early in June, it appeared as though page 3 students were facing the loss of a 24-hour study area,and access to the campus' only iilstration State; 24-hour photocopier. According to Laurier Vice-President Academic Dr. Russell :ar registration stats Muncaster and Chief Librarian Erich Schultz, ugh the numbers this is no longer the case. m last year, total Muncaster says that he will be deciding !p because of lower within the week where to locate a 24-hour study area after consulting with Schultz and WLUSU President Kevin Byers. In the past, a page 3 larqe reserve room in the hasement of the library served as a 24-hour study area Schultz maintained that "no other library· offered this service" and that the study area was being "abused by students." Schultz and Muncaster also echoed concPmc; held by Wes Robinson, Director of Phys1ca l Pla.1t and Planni l:J. ''The jamtcr:a! staff has experienced problems cleaning and getting rooms ready for the morning," said Muncaster. During an interview with the Cord, Muncaster took note of our concerns for access to quality photocopiers on a 24 hour basis, and promised that the problem would be solved by early next week When responding to complaints of mismanagement and disorganization of the page15 project, Muncaster responded frankly. "The delays were a result of unforeseen structural difficulties, and we have met the promise to of you who like have the facility completed by September. :ing, designing or Burning down the mouth! He also explained that during the summer, being involved in many structural re-organizations were taking heck out Theatre Frosh were treated to the spectacle of the Cosmic Comic Cabaret Wednesday night place throughout the school in response to at the Dining Hall. Although many may grumble that they would prefer burning sticks growth in certain programs, their needs, and page 17 to the dining hall fare, it looks a little too fiery for us. a desire to centralize faculties in specific areas of the school. This may have caused Supreme Court decision the appearance of disorganization, he noted. page 18 Ruling outlaws pro-rated ~ent season kicks off by David Black the Hawks meet Jver the course of the year, and lost apartment at Waterloo Towers, 137 the court, Utting says it may not be >hons in the first In a landmark decision, the · nterest on the money paid. Some University Ave. W. The fight originally ~ ....-;.·Bowl . easy to recover the money. Many Ontario Supreme Court has ruled students rely on the summer months began in 1980 and the tirst factors are involved and landlords that the practice of pro-rating rent is to earn money to meet the rental judgement ruled against the could claim the money was paid page 21 illegal. This ruling also invalidates costs, and with pro-rated rent they students. This recent victory for the voluntarily and does not constitute any signed leases that have the pro- had to come up with the money students was an appeal of that ruling. pro-rated rent. rated rent clause. · before the summer. The Federation of Students Byers echoed the problems still Pro-rating rent involves spreading Major landlords in the area are estimated the case would cost about vars1ty soccer being encountered. " It's fine to have 12 months rent over a shorter period affected by the judgement. It had $4,000 to litigate. Since it was an up for their first the court ruling, but where do we go of time, usually eight months. Chief been the practice of both Waterloo issue of concern to all university from here?" Byers feels that all Justice Joseph Potts ruled that pro- Towers and Hallman Rentals to students, other universities were students must become aware of the charge rent on a pro-rated basis. approached to share the costs. page 21 rated rent was a direct contravention new law and ensure that they hold of the Landlord-Tenant Act (LT A). They only applied the pro-rated rents WLUSU agreed, and contributed landlords to it. The judgement, made in July, has to student tenants. $500. According to WLUSU Byers is planning to hold a a dramatic effect on students in During the court case, landlords President Kevin Byers, "this benefits meeting with the Federation at UW to Waterloo, who will no longer be defended the use of pro-rated rents all schools and should have been see what the respective student r. required to put such large sums of by explaining that when students done a long time ago." Ten other unions can do to both inform and money 'up front.' Many students felt leave in the summer rent becomes universities j oined Laurier in protect students. Commissioners will they were discriminated against difficult to collect. Chief Justice Potts contributing to pay for the costs. The problem is far from over. next week. A because pro-rated rent forced them ruled that the pro-rating of rent was a Some landlords are still trying to Every student knows full well that to take place in the to pay for the summer's rent before form of a security deposit. Under the get around the ruling. Utting they are not in a good bargaining Centre on Tuesday they had a ch~nce to sublet it. LT A a security deposit cannot reported a case where a landlord position. This fall the housing is a.m. to 3:00 p.m. Tim Utting, Legal Services exceed the value of one month's demanded full payment of the lease extremely scarce, and the vacancy Director for Wilfrid Laurier rent up front. This amounted ~o about rate in Waterloc h~s dropped to University's Student Union (WLUSU) The University of Waterloo $5,000. According to Utting, this is 0.3%. Faced with these bleak said that having to pay pro-rated rent Federation of Students launched the the same as pro· rating over a one prospects. tr. -:r ..~·., t IS likely to hardship for most students. court case on behalf of Barbara Boyd month period. accept wi'latE'\ ~er 'lS the lar'Oiord were deprived of money and Robin Ide, who rented an Thoug"t this 1.11as ruled illegal by offering, whetr.E.: 1''c; ~gal or not. page 2 CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984

PIZZA

• PIZZA • SPAGHETTI • SUBMARINES

service. involves a student to his the WALK people into along six map). After a nig • would like to and who routes will group will travel their the group will simply .. Certosimo

WATERLOO 29 University Ave. East

1005 Ottawa Street North Laurentian Hills Plaza Stanley Park Mall Kitchener (entrance Dixie lilly) 893-6366 (Ottawa and Westmount) 742-6311 OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK TAKE OUT, DELIVERY PARTY RATES AVAILABLE Arts CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 page3

Birthright is an news emergency service designed to give friendly attention LUSU introduces new program t~ promote and practical help to I any woman who is ety- modified escort service incorporated pregnant. During that week they will be We can help if you presenting films, displays, and have an unwanted response to several incidents of In demonstrations promoting all pregnancy. For on campus last year, the aspects of safety. They also hope to laurier Student Union information and attract speakers so the issues can be assistance ... has initiated a new student aiven a forum. At the same time Certosimo and Howe will" gauge the as · (Students call SAFE success of the SAFE program" and Friends Everywhere), the IRTHRIGHT decide whether to make it a 0 wiD attempt to promote 579-3990 permanent program. awareness, and precautionary through various means. such features as a program, an Awareness Week ;:..;:;.;;.; 2 for 1·-----­ d for January, and a ·-- otional blitz this fall. coupon SAFE prooram is the product with hoc committee last February, desiqned at safety on and off campus up with the solutions," Design -a-wich to Scott Howe, one of the Open board members involved. $1.99 Certosimo, another WLUSU 12 noon Extras: member, is determined to Breads: ~eats Whole Wheat Ham lettuce incoming students aware of Kaiser Turkey Tomato _ problems Laurier has _____ SAFE Coupon valid Dark Rye Roast Beef Cheddar r...... rienced over the last couple of Pastrami MozzareUa ROUTES Mon. - Thurs. Swiss through the SAFE program. · Onion have already been minor Expires ,. Cucumber on campus, and there's no Six 'Walk' routes come close to most people's homes within a Sept. 13 WLV Choice of mustard or mayonnaise, in waiting for something major radius of 1.5 miles of Laurier. The dotted line indicates the six One meat included in price. happen before aoing something," SAFE walk routes. Walkers will meet with people who wish to said. use the service Monday through Thursday at 10:05 p.m. in the The incidents referred to by Concourse. Matt Certosimo, one of SAFE's organizers, 6HOIEI9 WATERLOO include the arrest of a describes the walk home service as a "student pedestrian pool." 4 King Sl N. (King & Erb) Waterloo 885-5840 man for trespassing at While designated people will be selected to lead the walks He was caught hiding in a initially, Certosimo hopes that groups will soon be able to ------·------~ washroom and identified organize themselves. caught 'peeping' in a woman's the year before. (see them at WLUSU offices on the The WALK program is designed "student pedestrian pool" with a little second floor of the Student Union protection for people ·organization, or an" orchestrated self Building). e atter night classes but help program". To get the program Another major thrust of SAFE is stressed it is not an escort started off, SAFE will use 'walkers' an ad program being run this week. (An escort service generally who ~II be the leaders of the groups a student escorting another an~ Will be recognized by a SAFE Certosimo explained that this is a to his or her home.) Instead ~mter. cap denoting their position. "well organized program to raise WALK program organizes ~·th time •. however, Howe hopes students' consciousness" about into groups who will walk there.. w•.!l be no need for safety. Brochures are being six pre-designated routes (see superv1s1on as the groups get used distributed to frosh, posters are to organizing themselves. being printed and ads are being The SAFE committee also sees placed in newspapers. The police a night class people who the group walks as a way of meeting and mayor have been consulted to to walk home in a group new friends and having fun walking ensure that the entire community is live alon~ one of the six involved. H.owe explained that this is will meet in the Concourse home instead of it bein~ a boring trudge after a night class. a very important aspect of the will then leave for home and Initially the 'walkers' will consist of program because " awareness itself AND YOU'RE THE their route. When a member of Ice Breakers but Howe and is a deterence." group reaches their home they Finally Howe and Certosimo are simply leave the group. Certosimo hope other people will WINNER! approach them to help with the effort planning a Safe Week for January. Certosimo describes WALK as a 1000's OF ROLLS TO . CHOOSE FROM Bring this ad in with you and receive ntry Average at record high the following specials:

funding and available space, as well The standard of 70% for BUY ONE GET $5.00 OFF as Laurier's desire to retain "the admission is three percentage points All PURCHASES A record-breaking Art.s and small classroom touch," Granger above last year's figure. According to admission standard of 70% defended the high admisssion Granger, this is simply because of ONE FREE indicative of an increasing demand standard. the greater number of applicants. He OH SElECTED ITEMS $50.00 or more limite duniversity space speculated that the high rate of the country, George "People at Laurier have to be unemployment, and bleak job _ r, Assistant Registrar· pleased that the standards are high," prospects for high school graduates k~~; ••;nnc said on Wednesday. said Granger. "It augurs well for the have prompted many young people FREE GIFT Come on down image of the school and the student to consider university as an option. Citing restrictions in government body as a whole." Unfortunately, this increase in WITH there is applications means that many EVERY potential students will be deinied much, much space, even though they have PURCHASE achieved the minimum 60% average in Grade 13. Granger exlained that accessibility is possible, saying that Registration Stats "if students are flexiable, most can find a place." Applied:9615 LSAT Enrolled:l376 GMAT Business: 770 Prep. courses for Arts & Science: all the rest Sepl29 LSAT Oct. 20 GMAT

for information call (416) 665-33n ( .... . ~ page4 CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 in brief

.Revised poster policy in effect Complaints about offensive posters concerning posters. appearing around the school last year has led Other notable changes to the policy include the school to revise its poster policy. 1) The maximum number of posten The revised policy, which took effect in April decreases from 50·25. ~~~~~ reads in part ... when displaying posters you 2) Event oriented posters must only "' will exercise common sense and good taste." posted for less then two weeks. Many complaints were raiSed last year over the 3) Stamps of approval are required. What appearance of stag posters in the halls. Twelve Though he admits that good taste is in the of the posters featured women in various eye of the beholder Nichols is convinced tha stages of nudity. this policy is an improvement on the Fred Nichols, Dean of Students, told the one. "I trust that once students putting "";;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;~ Cord that in the fall the school will hire a posters are aware that the new policy is irP student to police the posters in the school, see effect and will be enforced, the problems that they are hung in correct places and that have had in the past will subside," they conform to the school's new policies Nichols.

Vice President Venton to resign President: Finance, Peter has Laurier's Vice-President: Finance, Peter exceptional dedication, and had Venton, resigned from his post June 6. much to the welfare of the Venton served as Vice President for five Venton's job at Laurier included years, and cited personal reasons for his responsibilities of finance, personnel, decision to leave the school. services, physical plant, and athletic service Venton said that his family desired him to He has been noted for his contribution to th stay in Toronto. Presently, he travels home on school in such areas as salary and pensio weekends to see his family. His wife is reviews, the installation of a computerize employed there, and his family is reluctant to switchboard, and in-house development o move to Kitchener·Waterloo. computer forecasts. WLU President Dr. John Weir issued a The search committee that was establish! I'm very prepared statement with an announcement in June to find a successor for Venton hasy don't that said in part" ... during his five years as Vice to name a replacement Adventure Guide 258 King St. North (Just North of University Ave.) OSAP grants decrease sharply

(519) 886-3121 grant money saying, "this is the result of Last year over 6 million dollars was conscious decision on the part of the Ontan distributed in OSAP loans and grants to government about two years ago and ~t'Jr""'•­ Laurier students. This is 50% higher than the to be largely motivated by the ll>rt~nt'tllifl1l• year previous. crunch." The average OSAP loan last year was over The ave~age grant last year was $1 ,057 wli $2,500. As a result, the average OSAP .the average loan was $2,452. In 1979, Will going out on a limb recipient will owe over $1 0,000 after four years average loan was $},152. With the · in school. These large loans are in contrast to 1 inflation, this equated to a real riArr... ,..,. figures as little as four years ago. In 1980 over grants of over $400 per leave Helen's 55% of all OSAP money was in the form of Braden feels that the increase in grants. That number has been cut in half with allowing students to complete their , little more than 25% of all funding coming in places them under a great burden. The budget in limbo? \ the form of grant load becomes a heavy liability if, as ' Horace Braden, Director of Student Awards, students feel, there is reluctance to take expressed great concern over the decrease in responsibility of a loan. WLUSU considers joining CFS

This past summer, Wilfrid Laurier University Byers and Commissioner of University \Student Union (WLUSU), led by Vice-President Jane Flynn attended the Ontario Secretary Barb MJot, took the surprisinQ conference. . . . I initiative to make contact with the Canadian If WLUSU Wishes to JOin the nr111""i7;otil Federation of Students (CFS). . there must first be a referendum on CFS is Canada's national university student and over 50% of the full-time students union organization and has a membership of approve the move. In the meantime about 65 colleges and universities across Student Union can take pro Canada: Mlot attended the organiiation's membership in the Federation and pay annual summer national conterence that was fees. held in Edmonton this year. Once accepted as a full member Admittedly not knowing whatto expect Mlot will be charged $4 7.00 per student in CONTENTS returned from the conference convinced that Under the prospective membership-they • PEN • 1\Vo.TCH BOOK • l"tFORAATION • MONEY·SII\IING COUPONS there is a need for WLUSU to join the be levied a fee of $1.00 per student • ''CHURCH KEY" • OISI'OSI\BLE SHAVER • 5AL.E FL VERS • RECIPE BOOK1.fT organization. In the wake of Mlot's national The matter will be discussed by the • COASTERS 'louRS conference visit, WLUSU President Kevin board of directors in the coming fall <;i0,oo~'l\ !Bacchus expands to national (!

0 W SI'ORTS. 92 Kong St. S GAI.l.£RY IND!GENA. 22 Dupont St E. AU BAllA STEAK HOUSE. I JO King St S. STAG SHOP. 7 Kong St N PDR PICTURE F'I!AMES. 112·1/ 2 Kong St S. CUT (. DRIED IWR CAAE. 82 Kong St. S. an awareness arouo. not an abstinance Y~ KEYBOARD CENTRE. 13 Kong St S BEJ'iTS CN'Eill\5. 96 Kong St S. Aided by a grant from the Association of SCHENDEL STATIONERY. 120 Kong St S. MOniER'S PIZZA PAALCXJR, 28 Kong St N. Canadian Distillers, Bacchus launched a · said Smith. The group is concerned ACAD£l'.Y OF DANCE. 88 Kong St N WATERLOO TOWN SGlt.JAR.E BRONCO SHOES. 12 Bndgeport Rd E. TR!NfTY JEWElLERS. 22 King St. s national campaign. Laurier has been the only problem drinkers, and attempting to WORDS WORTH BOOKS. 88 Kong St S Canadian university to have such a program people from getting to that stage. " available for the students. The Association of of university students drink," said Canadian Distillers presented Bacchus with a of them have a drinking problem." $15,500 grant to cover their operating costs for is the Association of Distiller's Public the summer. Doug Smith, a Laurier 'student Director. She says that her associc~tion was hired to head up the program for the helping people take a more sensible summer. Bacchus, which originated in the towards drinking. When presenting the state of Florida less than five years aao. is a to Bacchus, she said "Our association is group that promotes a more responsible concerned that the Canadian young approach to drinking. Smith, and other develop good attitudes about drinking involved, continually have to stress that the products." CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 page 5 news) Question I of the Week WLUSU wrap-up and floor parties,'' according to by Bruce Maule adding a bar shell with railing. The WUJS(J president KeYin Byers. total cost of these renovations will be by Kart Van Lancfs(.hoot After the system was installed, it $4,200. Wilfrid Laurier University Student was discovered that the sound is not In other news: - Tim Otting has pies by Karim Virani Union (WLUSU) has been busier this the best when other activities are been appointed as Director of Legal summer than in the past, largely due taking place in the Turret At an April Services. · to the introduction of a full time paid 25 board meeting, it was suggested · A suggestion box will be placed summer president President Kevin that excess budget money be nect to the lrlormation Oftk:e. What Is your reaction to the CONSERVATIVE landslide victory Byers was hired for the summer by allocated for an improved sound - Wilfs hours will remain the student union at a salary of $295 syllem within the lounge. unchanged this year. They are from per week Treasurer Nancy Novinka noon to 2:00 p.m., 4:00 p.m. to 6:00 In addition, Byers received a free reported that Phase II will be p.m., and from 8:00 p.m. to 12:30 room in residence which cost the complete by this September. Phase II a.m. Monday to Friday. The hours on university an estimated $45 per consists of painting the Turret and Saturday are 8:00 p.m. to 12:30 a.m. week Barry Reider The ~295 weekly salary was 1st year Seminary . decided upon by a university It's about time, but I wish the personnel officer who rated Byer' s WLUSU: This is NDP was the Opposition. responsibilities. According to the university pay scales, his work justified a salary of $387 per week your student union At the first board meeting on the . . , subject of Byers' salary it was Returning . students to Launer floor as well. He is the university s decided that he would receive $325 have a good Idea otwhat~U~ liason with students. For per week A stipulation was added means and what Its function IS. relaxation, students will find Wilf s that he not be allowed to hold However, most first year s~udents lounge on the first floor open another job and that he file bi·weekly probably have no lde.a .. during the day and evening. Wilfs reports, with a summary being sent La~USUU . s~ntyd~t ~or t ii 1 ~fnd is fully licensed. to board members once a month. ~ner mv~rsl u en 01?n. WLUSU is also responsible for This was passed by a vote of eight for It ~s a registered corporation Student Publications, which puts and six against. ~hlch looks after stude~t out such things as the weekly At the next meeting, however, mterests on campus . and m newspaper (The Cord Weekly), "some people were upset about the Waterloo. ~very un~~rslty has a the W.L.U.er Handbook, the Wall Janet Fanning amount determined for my salary," student umon and It IS financed Calendar, the Pocket Planner, the 1st year Business said Byers. Five members had by the students . themselves. Inter-residence Yearbook and very surprised ... devastated. I requested a special meeting to ~LUSU provides many l.ooton (posters and buttons). don't know who won in my discuss the matter. Arts director seMces for students. They ~wn WLUSU is run mainly by riding. Jeffe Kaake moved that the and. operate the Student Umon students, although there are .President's salary be reconsidered Building (SUB) which itself offers some full-time employees. Many and that the figure of $295 per week many services. The best known of the students who run WLUSU moved. and appreciated service is likely are elected by the student body in Byers told the board that "the the Turretlthasoneofthe largest February each year. There is a salary was well researched and dance floors in the Kitchener- President and Vice-President as followed proper procedures." Byers Waterloo region, and always well as 14 board members who also explained that the situation at offers the latest in music. are elected from the various Laurier is unique. "Specifically, most On the second floor WLUSU faculties, other schools have full-ti me provides a games room. This Bi·monthly meetings are held Presidents year· round." includes video and pinball games and many committees are Board members also questioned and pool tables. The hours of formed to deal with various whether students would benefit from operation are from about 10 :00 student issues. In addition, many the $5,500 outlay and . if WLUSU a.m. to 12:00 p.m. Next to the of the board members sit on couldaffordasalarythathigh.Nancy Games Room is a 24·hour 1V other committees and boards in Novinka, WLUSU Treasurer lounge. This is often used by the school. Peter Silcox confirmed, however, that WLUSU students waiting for their next WLUSU's funding comes from 1st year Computer Bectronics did the ability to ::lass, or by people who just can't two sources. Part is provided by It's great, I'm happy. have pay. . The motion for dropping the missY and R. Finally, the second student fees collected at the same President's salary to $295 per week floor houses the offices of the time as tuition (currently $55 per was passed. ltudent union and publications. . student). Other revenue comes During the summer. WLUSU The first floor of the SUB from the operation of the Turret, spent close to $10,000 in their contains an information booth. the Games Room, and Wilfs. continuing efforts to upgrade the This booth sells Grey Coach WLUSU is here to serve the Turret More than half of this. fig~re tickets, postage stamps, and students, so anyone with was spent on a Video ProJection tickets to student union concemsorproblemsisinvitedto Monitor for ~illison Lo~nge. sponsored bands and events. the student union offices. Many (Willison Lounge IS the room m the Residence students will also find other services not mentioned northwest comer of the Turret). The their mailboxes on the first floor. here are available such as legal monitor was purchased because "it The Dean of Students, Fred aid, and others exPlained in detail Stedman will cause Willison to be utilized Nichols, has his office on the first in the W.LU.er Handbook more, especially by campus clubs L~~~~~~~~-----.;.;.. year Anarchy ______, M Tories should have sulphuric ICid sprayed in their faces and their limbs hacked off with chainsaws. dACK ABACK#1. The Snake Ble. elease 2 fluid ounces Rof Yukon Jack, a dash of juice from an unsus- pecting lime, tumble them Shana Hagan CNer ice and you'll have skinned the Snake Bite. Patti Martindale Inspired in the wild, midst 1st year Sociology the damnably cold,this, the If s great. I think Brian is a blacksheepofCanadian classy guy. liquoo, is Yukon Jack 'hkon .... ~ Jack 6 8 The Buck Sheep of Cmadian L~uors. Concocted with fine unadian Whisky.

For more Yukon Jack recipes write: MORE YUKON JACK RECIPES, Box 2710, Postal Station ·u ~ Toronto, Ontario MSZ 5P1 . page 6 CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984

lcomriient •.

University Editor NEWS understanding Editor Assistant Editor Now that summer camp is over we can tum our collective Contributors thoughts to just exactly why we have all arrived at Laurier's doorstep and what miraculous things we expect to happen to us over the next three or four years. The first answer is easy. We have come here to attend university. That is no great revelation. ENTERTAI The second question is a bit more difficult to answer. Why have Editor we come to university? Contributors If you have come here for job training, you have come to the wrong place. If you are expecting your degree to give you a job in sales or management upon graduation, you have come to the wrong place. If this is the only reason you are attending university, you might as well save yourself some money by dropping out SPORTS now and enrolling in a Lougheed Business College Editor correspondance course. You'(( learn just as little. Contributor umversJty ts not a government sponsored jOb-creation program. The number of recently graduated students who are collecting unemployment insurance will testify to that dismal fact. People COPY EDI between the ages of 20·24 suffer greater than 20% unemployment. University graduates are fairing somewhat better with only 11% unemployment What is university then? University is a chance for people to PRODUCT learn. Not to memorize what is in their psych, history or business text but to learn and grow. At university you are going to meet Manager more people than you ever have before, people of different Assistants religions, race, creed and possibly sexual orientation. How you react to these different people is what university is about This is what forms your learning and growing. You have come to university with an established set of beliefs PHOTOG A and prejudices. Once at university you will have those beliefs Photo Manager challenged. With this challenge you must decide if your beliefs are Photo Technician strong enough and/or adequate enough to get you through the Graphic Arts next stage of your growth. Your growth into an adult. Once Contributors challenged, how will you react? Will you reach out and learn as much as you can, digest it and adapt to a new belief system? CIRCULAT This is what university is all ~bout · meeting these challenging new thoughts, beliefs and people and growing in the process. Of course this is all based on the assumption that you will have some type of challenge in the next few years outside of the TYPESETT classroom. If you are already set in your ways at the ripe old age of 18 and don't plan on facing any of these challenges or for that Head Typesetter matter challenging yourself, the phone number for Lougheed is in the Yellow Pages under shut·in. "And the universe is unfolding as it should." ~. ~ o• ·~- .- ~. - ""'-"~ ------1 Chuck Kirkham L------_;;,_...;;;.....;;;..;...;;.___ ADVERTISI We need you The Cord welcomes all comments, criticisms, =::~~~ Volenteers are once again needed at The Cord Weekly. This or suggestions from its_readers. J,..etters to the student paper cannot operate without the input of more students. Funny I know, but we just seem to work best that way. Editor must be typed, double-spaced and hande ~!~r::~Pius Of course writers are needed, as are photographers. Also into the Cord editor by Monday noon. needed are production assistants, dark room help and g~phic artists. This is your big chance to become involved with one of All letters must bear the author's full name an1 CLASSIFJE the more exciting organizations on campus. Where else is sports, Co-ordinator -the arts, and.pcilitics, part ofthe no~I workirig- Clay. You Will tie elephone number. hard pressed to tind another such organization. The Cord reserves the right to refuse any submission which it considers racist, sexist, letters homophobic or libellous in nature. All letters ar subject to editing for length. Straight talk on gays I'd like you to get things straight you feel threatened if you're secure about gay discrimination. about your own sexual orientation? I Do you have any profound or outragous idea I'm straight. Even so, I cannot sign once heard a guy say that line and my name at the bottom of this paper. later discovered that he was gay. He Possibly you think you're the next Chuck I can't, because I'm obliged not to told me it was easier to deny it at the jeopardize the reputations of my gay time. Tatham? friends, especiaily if they're not I find that tragic - that it would be completely out ot the closet.' easier to deny yourself than to listen The Cord will supply, each week, a forum for Every time you hear a prejudicial to those cruel discriminatory words. comment about gays uttered in a In the same way my friend appears guest viewpoints and columns. All submissions conversation, think about it, as a fool, so does every person who ne Cord offices especially if you made the comment. says that kind of thing. And every must be typed, double spaced and_ handed into the Student Union It is possible that one of your friends time you say that kind of thing, there University. in that very conversation is gay and is probably someone listening who the Cord editor by Friday noon. you just finished hurting him or her thinks that you're a fool. Most gay again. It's also possible that a friend people appear to be 'straight' - how The Cord reserves the right to edit submissio who is straight, like me, has just been would you know who you are hurt again by your uneducated offending? And when you're not it considers racist, sexist, homophobic or Copyright 1984 remarks. aware of the gay people around you, vie~Npoints lzlurier I feel nauseous when I hear the it may surprise you to know that one libellous in nature. All and columns plJrt Of thiS puL'II'-'GIUI famous "I don't care what they do, as of your 'straight' best friends is gay. pennission of the long as the faggots don't come near One of mine was. are subject to editing for length. me." Why would a gay person come near you if you're straight? How can Louis CORD WEEKLY Friday, September.7, 1984 page 7 ~ 'U-·wtdy ~r , , com!ijent 1

Editor Chuck Kirkham Landlord problems far from- resolved

by Bruce Maule something about it. renting to students who agree. For every Although an individual student does NEWS When a high school student considers student that refuses, ten more will agree ~------not have the resources or knowledge simply to get a place to live. Editor Bruce Maule a university education s/he will most necessary to challenge a landlord likely expect final exams to be the most Real protection to students can only be Assistant Editor Bruce Arcuius practice such as this, an organization provided by a law which is both designed Contributors David Black difficult task during the future three or would. As a result, in 1980 the to stop pro-rating of rent and by one Matt Certosimo four years. When they arrive at university, Federation of Students at The University Timothy Neesam however, they soon discover they were of Waterloo launched a court battle in an which provides for penalties if it is Chuck Tatham wrong. In actuality, finding an apartment effort to outlaw pro-rated rent. Finally, disobeyed. It is fine to say that pro-rated to live in will probably be the most four years and $5,000 later, the rents are illegal but in the absense of difficult. Federation won it's case and pro-rated sanctions what do they really do'? ENTERTAINMENT At last count the vacancy rate in rent has been outlawed. A possible solution is to impose stiff Waterloo was only 0.3%. This does not fines on landlords who try to include a Editor Ruth Demeter This ruling means that all leases with a compare will wlth the 4% level which pro-rated rent clause or other illegal Peter Lear clause allowing pro-rated rent are void. Contributors economists say is optimal for both clauses in a lease. The fines should apply David Black All students should be aware of this and landlords and tenants. This extremely low should refuse to sign contracts with such whether or not the person renting agrees vacancy rate means two things. First, clauses. to them. This way the apartment hunter obviously, it is difficult to find an · Unfortunately this ruling does not solve dbes not worry about being pressured SPORTS apartment But secondly, when an all the housing problems for students. into a pro-rated rent agreement with an apartment is found the tenant is in no Landlords, who predictablY don't like unscrupulous landlord. The tenant could Editor Theresa Kelly position to bargain. The landlord can and this restriction, are trying earnestly to find simply accept the clause and then draw Contributor Chuck Tatham usually does set whatever terms s/he a loop hole in the law. One case has it to the attention of the authorities who wants. Of course the tenant can been reported where the landlord has would deal with landlord. complain. S/he can also sleep in a tent . charged the whole year's rent up front This case reflects a growing trend in all winter. Tim Utting, Legal Services Director for the way we tend to deal with problems. A COPY EDITING One of the terms which landlords have WLUSU feels this amount to pro-rated solution is given to a problem and it is become particularly fond of demanding Usa Schildroth rent except in a period of one month. followed through with. But somehow, is pro-rated rent The high student someone forgets to ask whether it will population in Waterloo makes this an Examples like this serve to prove a work. While the Federation is to be area where many people are subject to point. No matter what, if occupancy rates commended for their significant court PRODUCTION this stipulation. The landlords apply it continue at an almost zero level then victory and the benefits it may provide to Manager Karen Thorpe almost exclusively to students who are, students will be vulnerable. The landlord many students, they should go one step can still get pro-rated rent by simply Assistants Heather McAsh coincidentily, the least able to do further. Laura Lee Millard Andrew Dunn PHOTOGRAPHS / GRAPHICS Being aware is being SAFE Photo Manager Karim Virani by Matt Certoslmo '84 ), what happens when the whole city action. First, the washroom 'peeping Carl Van Landschnnt Photo Technician and Timothy Neesam is plastered with these signs? "Will toms' demonstrated that Campus Peter Lear G111phlc Arts Technician "So what does the pamphlet say?" crime disappear from Toronto? Isn't Security can't be expected to be in all Richard Cousins Contributors "I donno; it's got some weird design on this a silly way of deluding ourselves places at one time. Anything short of it and it says 'SAFE'." into thinking that the dark forces have armed guards and dogs and security "More birth control information?" been put on the defensive?" cameras would leave some areas on CIRCULATION & FILING "Probably. 'Preventative' it says. Oh, no Now, at Laurier, WLUSU is campus somewhat unsafe. Secondly, a sponsoring a program called SAFE and Nancy Bruin wait, there's more." Laurier student was mugged on Hazel Brochures, pamphlets and reports: it is taking much of its logic from these Street by a small gang of assholes, an each telling me to be more careful other, already tried safety awareness incident that reminds us that safety is TYPESETTING while doing everything from riding a programs. Why? Has WLU and the not only a women's issue. This student bike to walking home at night surrounding area become so infested was male and he was forced to face a Head Typesetter Wendy Chapelle with 'shadow lurkers' that people need knife on a well-lit, close to campus Jennifer Grady One brochure, entitled "Don't take to be paranoid about their safety? The route. Uz Young chances", begins with a chart that answer is quite simply " no" . No, there So, Laurier isn't perfectly safe. And, shows the rapid increase in crime since haven't been enough incidents to spur regardless of what John Sewell says, ADVERTISING 884-2991 1972. For example, assault is up 64% a reactionary protection service. I guess awareness programs that warn citizens and rape (sexual assault) is up 74% . that's why SAFE isn't that type of and criminals alike do work. From this factual base, the brochure Fred Taylor program. Furthermore, SAFE is just beginning. Manager justifies its 'safety tips': 'don't walk Assistants Ruth Demeter Some people have suggested that The people involved are learning with isms, alone'; 'don't take rides from strangers'; SAFE is more of a problem than the every step taken. The hope is that we're Ben Kooh 'keep your doors locked'. Is our society I Cliff Somerville problems it will face. That is, by making one step ahead of the problems, so we the becoming so violent that we should live a big deal about student awareness, can adapt quickly to the needs and National Advertising anded our lives in fear; live our lives in a SAFE is actually bringing attention to concerns of WLUers. But SAFE is Campus Plus (416) 481-7283 protective, security womb?? 'what if situations that don't exist here. secondary to the awareness it should on campus are well-lighted and well· You see, awareness does not mean raise. With all honesty, perhaps SAFE 884·2990 plllrolled. anything more than just that: awareness. should discontinue its efforts after this e and CLASSIFIEDS Then there's the Neighbourhood 1 1 Rather than waiting for an incident to trial year. Would this mean, however, Cl>ordinator Mike Kacmar Watch program that has all of Toronto raise our concern for safety, thereby that a major incident, like that of the organizing into mini community forts. being reactionary, SAFE asks people to murder last year at MacMaster The guide explains that with the use of be aware of the potentially dangerous University, would bring about the rebirth signs with peering red eyes, community situations and prevent them. of a preventative Safety program? I Watch committees and neighbourly co· Don't live your life in fear, but let's don't know about you, but I prefer a The Cord Weekly is published weekly during the operation the " ...threats to you and face it · life is not one continuous Frosh little inconvenience and thought, to an fall and winter academic terms. Editorial opinions your neighbours property can be Week! After all, Laurier did have a unwanted event. rs are are independent of the University, WWSU, and reduced." But, as John Sewell said in couple of incidents last year which I guess SAFE is more like birth Student Publications. The Cord is a member of the Globe and Mail ('Metro', Sept. 4, showed a need for some concern and control information than I thought. the Canadian University Press news collective. Eight month, 24 issue Cord subscription rates are: $)2.00 for addresses within Canada and $15 any.vhere else. What's up, Chuck? by Chuck Tatham The Cord welcomes all comments, criticisms and e) Kitchener - a large city to our right, of fact, I've done a quick review of suggestions from its readers. Letters to the Editor Stuff To Do Around Waterloo That No Kitchener has the largest per capita some of their big hits: roost be typed, double-spaced and handed into One Has Told You Frosh About Yet: population of greasy hoodlums and THE BRADY BUNCH · first of all, Cindy the editor prior to Monday noon. All letters must offensive sleazbags in Ontario. Only deserves a lobotomy. She nauseates beer the author's full name and telephone a) the Kent Hotel · it's not pretty, but town in Canada wl">ere it is legal to give oomber. The Cord reserves the right to refuse any you can relax there. If motorcycle me immensely. Florence Henderson out prophylactics for Hallowe'en. (Carol) looks like a stork, and she submission which it considers racist, sexist, gangs and toothless strippers are your f) University of Waterloo · our friends treats the boys in the family like a homophobic or libellous in nature. All letters are cup of tea, this place will be like heaven for just down University Avenue, these folks subject to editing for length. to you. bunch of emasculated wimps. Robert really think they're pretty special. Reed (Mike) outghta knee-drop her and ions b) Harmony Lunch · a stylish little restaurant located just down King Unfortunately, most U of W women are kick Alice, the fat maid, outta the into The Cord offices are located on the 2nd floor of Street, the Harmony's food is especially built like pool cues and most of the house. Alice never does any damn the Student Union Building at Wilfrid Laurier guys sleep with a Commodore 64. (and work around the house anyway. All she University. good about 20 minutes before the public health officer's weekly visit. Ask I don't mean Uonel Ritchie) does is eat, go on trips and eyeball about the fish soup and the antidote. g) Morty's · an exquisite bar across Greg's athletic friends. Lazy lummox. T)lleSet by WW Student Publications and printed King from the Athletic Centre, this GILLIGAN'S ISLAND - this whole show Ill Fairway Press, Kitchener. c) Ruby's · whether you're a guy or a gal, if herpes is what you want, Ruby's place should be renamed "Shorty's" , is unbelievable. In real life, the Skipper is where you'll get it. Only bar in town judging by the size of the dance floor. would probably kill everybody so he Copyright 1984 by Studnet Publications, Wilfrid with penicillin on tap. i) CKCO·TV · the local TV station that could hog all the food. The Professor l.a!rier Waterloo, Ontario. N2L 3C5. No ns Univ~rsity, you can haul in whether you have cable obviously wants to get Mary Ann in the part of this publication may be reproduced without d) Waterloo Park · a very pretty place permission of the editor. in the daylight, this natural wonderland or not. You can get retinal damage sack; what the hell's wrong with him? turns into a real "zoo" at night. Avoid from staring at the jackets on the And I don't even have to say what people who come out of tents carrying CKCO news team, and most of the Gilligan would do with Ginger if he was large salamis. other shows stink as well. As a matter heterosexual. page 8 CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984

1'HI 1J,;.-Jn....._" .: ._bn_~ ·e•___.(_ ,, -- ______NIEON fLAMINGO Profs resign over conflict Work

MONTREAL (CUP) - McGill University was The two professors set a precedent atM: unable to prevent a major conflict of interest when they rented lab spaee cheaply a DANCE when two of its microbiology professors university last year, used school equiprr interrupted their work to develop a secret and personnel to develop a secret proce! HOT invention, a report commissioned by the removing metals from liquids. They die Wonied about FEEL lliE HEAT university says. while still employed as full·time professo- loans? The The two McGill professors, Irving DeVoe and McGill principal David Johnston sa~ being expanded PARlY TO lliE RHYTHM Bruce Holbein, have since resigned from their university is now drawing up new guideline students on· or off· McGill posts. private research at the university. He exp part time basis. OF lliE NEON BEAT The Paterson report, released last spring, senate to approve the guidelines this fall Funded jointly confirmed allegations by McGill's student Some members of McGill's se; Government and STEP BY STEP newspaper, the McGill Daily, and the Montreal however, are dissatisfied with the rep: funds of up to Gazette that the two professors: findings. Paddy Webb-Hearsey, McGill fa: deemed to be COME ON • hired McGill microbiology staff and kept union president, said she thought the Ill Braden, Director 1 them on their private company payroll while justified the professors' abuse a at WLU, is hoping ' the staff received full salaries from the positions. advantage of university; "It seems the primary aim is to justilj "Not only does • hired DeVoe's wife on Holbein's National happenings. The actual information is q dependency on Science and Research Council grant, "doing horrendous if taken without the opinions a provide career Great music, great people. great atmosphere indirectly what probably could not be done Alex Paterson." are certainly life directly;" She also questioned Paterson's impartil gain much more & student prices • ignored their students and were secretive saying he works for Royal VIctoria HC!Sf Braden explained. about their work; which is closely associated with ~ • used government research funds to buy medicine faculty, including the microbia supplies for a private on-campus lab; department • sold stock to department staff, breaking According to DeVoe and Holbein, Quebec law; process can be used to remove iron i OPEN WED. • SAT. • paid for the services of millionaire stock foods, stopping bacterial growth. It canals HAPPY' HOOR 8 · 10 broker Irving Kott, who has been convicted of used to remove precious metals from n NO COVER WED. & lHURS. fraud. tailings. (or FRI. & SAT. before 10) No fare deal for Ottawa studen1 OTTAWA (CUP) - Ottawa's local transit the three schools· and the transit C0f111 ALJ...NIGHTERS company has refused to reduce bus fares for discovered that students think $20 i Fri. & Sat till 4 a.m. post secondary students, despite a seven year reasonable price for a monthly bus pass1 lobbying effort by student councils here. that the company's revenues would notd Citing an Three post secondary institutions - but would increase by nearly $20(),000 1 as opposed to Carleton University, the University of Ottawa result fought for two and Algonquin College - suggested a $20 "Srudents have to tell people they wan second year monthly bus pass for students, who now pay $2Q pass)," he said. than doubled $30 a month. High school students pay only Marcerollo added that if the institutl $32,000. Braden $18.50. accept the transit company's plan the redu support the But John Bonsall, the general manager for rate would be in place by September 1~ administration Ottawa-Carleton Transpo, said a $20 pass will the earliest, and buying passes at bulk 11 financially, and only be created if a universal fee of $2Q is levied would mean the student councils would il PCS office, to the on all students during registration. He said this a loss if not all students bought the idea move would protect the transit company from Marcerollo said the councils are~ possible revenue losses of up to $1 million. adler options, including possible retald Tony Marcerollo, Carleton University against OC Transpo. '.,UNIVERSITY OF WATERLOO student council vi<:e-president, said the Said John Casola, Carleton's stu! student association will press for its original council president: "How do pennies 9 Y"'f JEWISH STUDENTS ASSOCIATION- HILLEL proposal. He said a survey commissioned by )OU•• .say, 90 of them!'

CAMPUS CENTRE ROOM 235, UNIVERSITY Of WATERlOO, WATERLOO, ONTARIO CANADA N2L 3G1 Organizational Meeting: Visa students ''screwed'' by fee hu WED. SEPT. 12th, 4:30 pm C.C. 110 TORONTO (CUP) - Some visa students are information," said the stuctents' fat Opening Wine & Cheese Party: suing the University of Toronto for what they Kenneth Swan. call a "blatant" lack of notice about increases About 560 students are irM:llved in thee~ in differential fees. case and could win up to $t30() in back IIi THURS. SEPT. 20th, 5:30 pm UNIVERSITY CLUB The students, who have won the financial if the suit is SU

Coming up VANCCXNER (CUP) - Canada's best paid But instead, the outgoing student 1.n student union business manager got a 10 per president and the finance director ha Ismel Day Hanukkah Party cent salary increase this year without the negotiated the business manager's salary. "How can executive SB:f WED. OCT. 17th approval of the student council. the they SAT. NOV. 24th 8:00pm Charles Redden at the University of B.C. now wasting student money?" said Low. "fd rat CAMPUS CENTRE LOCATION TBA makes a whopping $73,000 a year, up $7,000 use the money for bursaries than give I from his previous salary and twice the amount someone who already has a fairiy go Watch for. of the next highest paid business manager in income." Canada. Speakers on V~rious Topics · S~bbat Dinners · Redden, who thinks salary increases sho. lnter·Campus Softball T oumament "It's outrageous that the (Student Union) would give a 10% increase to the general be kept confidential, said Low should not ha manager whose salary is double that of any reported the increase to UBCs stude Contacts: student society general manager," said Doug newspaper, The Ubyssey. Membership: Low, student union vice-president and the only JONATHAN KOVEN 886·7772 executive to oppose the increase. James Hollis, student union finano 1984-85: $5.00 SHARI SEGALL 886.0293 Low said the salary increase should be director, advised The Ubyssey not to pubi . OR USE MAILBOX IN FED OFFICE ratified by council, according to the society's infonnation about Redden's salary in<:re1 UNIVERSflY OF WATERLOO by· laws. because it would be "in bad taste". CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 news) Will going out on a limb I leave Helen's nflict Work study plan promises budget in limbo? fessors set a precedent at~ nted lab space cheaply year, used school Pt"DJ!n..­ to aid students in ~'~ee . d to develop a secret ~~Is from liquids. Worried about those mounting OSAP have all responded in a positive way with very ployed as full-time professors loans? The Ontario Work Study Program is helpful and constructive criticism," he noted. ipal David Johnston said being expanded this year to allow qualified To qualify for the program, students are ~ow drawing up new guidelines students on- or off- campus employment on a required to display financial need. As the Work rch at the university. He part time basis. Study Program operates within the confines of the guidelines this Funded jointly by the Ontario Provincial OSAP,astudentmustbeapprovedforajobby :....mbers of McGill's Government and WLU, the program provides the Awards Office. However, a student need dissatisfied with the funds of up to $500 per term for students not necessarily be collecting OSAP benefits to Webb-Hearsey, McGill deemed to be in financial need. Horace be eligible. "Each situation is assessed said she thought the Braden, Director of the Student Awards Office individually, and there are several cases in professors' abuse of at WLU, is hoping that more students will take which a student could qualify for a job while advantage of the program this year. not receiving OSAP loans or g~nts," Braden "Not only does the program help offset the 'said. dependency on loans, but the job itself c~>Uid ' Once the eligibility requirements are met, a Introduce yourself to the money-saving gOOds and sel"llices in Uptown Waterloo. Show your uni~~ersity student i.d. to recei~~e provide career training. In any case, the JObs listing of jobs can be found in the PCS office. It your Uptown Waterloo grab bag at any one of the are certainly life related. In this sense, students is then up to the students to select a job for establishments listed below. gain much more than just financial aid," which they are qualified, and apply to the CONTENTS Braden explained. potential employer. Braden cautions that a • PEN • MATCH BOOK • MONEY SAVING COUPONS financial approval from his office does not : ~OR!-IATION • sJ:j_RCH KEY • DISPOSABLE SHAVER guarantee a posting. "We had 30 positions • RECIPE BOOKLET open last year, but only filled 23. In some •COAS~ cases, the jobs were not compatible with the !interest of the student Some job postings GO'{ouRS asked for highly specialized people, and 10Dt''{\ lcouldn't be filled. Some students simply did ' not have the drive to acquire a job," explained 0 W SPORTS. 92 King St S GAll£RY INDIGENA. 22 Dupont St E Braden. A1.J BAllA STEAK HOUSE. I 30 King St S. STAG SHOP. 7 King St N POR PICTURE FRAMES. 1121 / 2 King St S CUT £, DRIED IWR CARE. 62 King St S. YAMAliA KEYBOARD CENTRE. 13 King St S BENTS CAMERAS. 96 King St S A pamphlet detailing the program will be SCHENDEL STATIONERY. 120 King St S MOTHER'S PIZZA PARLOUR. 28 King St N ACN:IEJ'IY OF DANCE. 6B King St N WATERLOO TOWN SGXJAAE handed out to ali new students as well as those BRONCO SHOES. 12 Bndgeport Rd E. TRINnY JEWELLERS. 22 King St S who will be recipients of OSAP benefits this WORDS WORTH BOOKS. 68 King St S and the transit com...... l year. Braden feels that this "opportunity for students think $20 reliance" will not be ignored by students if they for a monthly bus pass become aware of its many benefits. revenues would not Citing an alarming increase in student loans The second significant aspect of the by nearly $200,000 as as opposed to grants, Braden has successfully program this year is that it is being expanded to fought for two major changes in the program's off-campus locations. In the program's first second year of operation. Funding has more year of operation, only on-campus jobs with than doubled since last year, from $}2,538 to various faculties or administration $)2,000. Braden is lavish in his praise for the departments could qualify for the program. support the program has received. "The Now, volunteer agencies that operate on a administration has been most supportive non-profit basis will be eligible to hire a student, Waterloo financially, and everyone involved, from the and have their salary paid by the Work Study PCS office, to the employers and employees, Plan. HOLD EVE lNG!

Come to Pants Plus first IT'S A WHOLE NEW LOOK salary increases should said Low should not have toUBC'sstuden t>~«rm~m= "lllu1 student union financial (Jbyssey not to publish Waterloo Town Square 886-1260 Redden's salary increase "in bad taste". Westmount Place 886-1268 page 10 CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984. LUS

Tickets on sale at the Information Centre Monday, September lOth

W.L.U. $5.00 Others $6.00 erms of Endearment

BLUE JAY GAME on licens ·. Friday, September 14 1984 received Clendenni was pack The e September 13th Mondayn Room lEI at 8 pm night at W, was full o such agO< not to not week. Breakdan< demonstrc: Tickets are available at appear. Tuesda the Information Centre down. Tii Q_\?1 scavenge~ Going where no man has go.ne before ·entation Takes Oil Last Monday over 1,300 frosh success with 55 teams Wednesday morning came too way to the area's classiest night night. Today, bus tours of the area descended on the T A. for the first participating. Teams had a listof25 soon, but it was time for the next spots. Over 500 frosh crowded are being offered. The day ollicial welcome to Laurier and the items to procure within a time limit event · 'Sinking The Enemy' at their way onto nine buses to culminates with a huge Shinerama start of Orientation Week activities. of about three hours. Foxwood Golf Course. Over 50 participate in the annual event. The Bash at Conrad Hall and The For the first time in history of Success in the hunt required groups of four players each crawlers visited the Coronet, the Turret. Tomorrow, Shinerama Laurier, Orientation Week was cunningness to figure out clues, a smashed small white round aliens Neon Flamingo, the 'Loo, the Kent, explodes into the streets of centered around a single theme · good knowledge of Star Trek to across countless fields. and Ruby's. Anyone still standing Kitchener.Waterloo with over 1,000 Sar Trek. Frosh were guaranteed answer Trekkie trivia questions, Clendenning said all involved were after the pub crawl had Star Trek frosh participating. the lime of their life from the perseverence in finding items and a sure to have a good time, especially movies and the Cosmic Comedy moment they boarded 'Starship large dose of luck. The items since there was a prize for almost Cabaret to look forward to on Orientation -week winds up on Laurier' at the T A. until the time it included Lt. Uhura's favorite every player. Wednesday night. Sunday with an afternoon concert on Sunday night. centertold (officials wanted to see a In the afternoon, Orientation Orientation Week continued in and a slide show of the -week's Sheila Clendenning, one of nude male centerfold). Also Week's most popular and famous full swing with the annual events later on in the evening. Orientation's organizers, said "The required were Dr. Spock's balls event · The Pub Crawl · made its Bingeman Park Bash on Thursday response to Orientation Week has (green of course) and a plastic nhAnomenal." Even more flying saucer (only a frisbee was has been the response accepted). One of the more non-alcoholic events. enjoyable requirements involved Clendenning explained that many tasting all 31 flavours at Baskin Shinerama aims for $15,000 dtheFrosh (about 60%) are under Robbins. Only the smartest people were able to decipher the clue, Next is the breakfast in the attention and support the group is a result, the organizers held by Bruce Maule events to a minimum. "Beam me up to the Bridge, Dining Hall to start the Shiners off hanging a number of large banners every event which did Scottie." Teams had to find Spock This Saturday the Shinerama on the right foot. Directly after across King Street. inClude alcohol had a twin event on a bridge in Waterloo park to get Fund-raising campaign will enter its breakfast, 1,000 Shiners will hit After a day of fund raising the 1\tUch was dry. the points. 20th year. WLU began participating the streets of K.W. 103 locations Shiners will return to Laurier for a ''The effort to reduce the reliance The most ferocious competition in the event the first year it was have been targeted for the BBQ dinner followed by the on licensed activities has been occurred in the judging of 'Your launched and has participated in 1000 frosh to do their stuff. They Shinerama Bowl football game, received very well," according to Favourite Creature' costumes. The every campaign since. will be transported to their posts in another first. The game is between Clendenning. "Almost every event costumes were rated on a scale Laurier students raised 9000 for a fleet of eight buses. WLU and Guelph at Seagram WilS packed." from 1 to 15. With many teams in a the cause last year, placing 8th out of Each location will be run by a Stadium. All proceeds will be The enthusiasm started on dead heat in points, the quality of 45 participating universities. The group of frosh. Residence frosh will donated to Shinerama. tblday night with a break dancing the costumes meant the difference University of Western Ontario raised be led by their Dons and off· At the game, prizes will be right at Waterloo Arena. The arena between winning and losing. the most money last year with a total campus frosh will be organized by awarded to the winning team of full of frosh who were having Soon after the hunt was over and of $45,000. the Ice-Breakers. Once in position Shiners. The group of Shiners who such agood time that they seemed supper taken care of, it was time for This year's goal at Laurier is to raise the Shiners will shine boots and car place first will receive ten cases of not to notice the first hitch of the the next event. A street dance in the $15,000; if achieved, Laurier will, in windows and hand out balloons. beer, and the second place group week. The Sonic Dream Quad attracted over 400 frosh who all probablity, rank among the top Donations will be accepted for all will win a pizza party. The third Breakdancers who were to put on a soon discovered that dancing was frve. these activities. place prize still remains a mystery. demonstration were unable to the best way to keep warm on a Shinerama starts Friday night The community always University of Waterloo students cool September evening. At the with a pre-Shinerama bash. It is responds well to Shinerama, will get involved in Shinerama for pace didn't slow same time, the Turret enjoyed a occurring simultaneously at the according to WLU organizer Jim the first time this year by 'Search for Spock' capacity crowd as frosh jammed Turret and Clara Conrad Hall. Gabel. This year, in hopes of more conducting 15 car washes at hunt was a run-away into Laurier's favourite night spot. various locations around the city. page 12 CORD WEEKLY Friday, SepteJllber 7, 1984

• ---~~• page 14 CORD WEEKLY Friday. September 7, 1984

Your Roommate is. • • Cystic Fibrosis And What About Your Roo mate ?You'll find that he or she will ... · will wet the bed Cy~tic Fibrosis is not a high profile . not do any laundry until at least November · will wet the window disease so it may surprise most . will claim no knowledge of your missing · will wet the floor people that it is a major killer of cache of goodies · will wet your bed young people. In fact, cystic fibrosis SHINERAMA . will hide prophylactics in your bed for . will keep you awake until 5 a.m. to tellyou is the second leading killer of young when your parents decide to come for a of how they lost their virginity. They will do people behind only leukemia. visit this twice a month, and each time it will be Cystic fibrosis is a disease which . will promise to pay back that $20 'as soon a different story. effects the digestive system and as the cheque from Mom comes in' . will test market stupid jokes on you before lungs and occurs in one out of every . will crank Pablo Cruise or Meatloaf at 4 telling other people. They will be jokes like 1800 Canadian births. This a.m. 'What's purple and has to be plugged hereditary disorder is characterized . will cut their toenails on your side of the in? .. .An electric grape.' by abnormal secretions of the room . will dry their hair with a blow dryer in the mucous and sweat glands which . will position their furniture in such a way as room at 7 a.m . impair the normal functioning of the to take up over 70% of the space · will borrow all of your socks digestive system and lungs. . will either be gay, or a 350 lb. suma . will refuse to sleep in the lounge when you A child with cystic fibrosis is very wrestler who greets you with a flying bring a 'guest' over, and insist that they pay susceptible to pneumonia and has kneejerk headlock every time she sees you . will spread your deepest darkest secrets to great difficulty digesting food. To aid . will borrow your car in Frosh Week, return everyone you know in digestion, a cystic fibrosis patient it in May, and the gas tank will be empty . will never have money for the phone bill must take 20 pills before each meal. while this amount is high, research has cut the amount of medication required to a fraction of what was needed a decade ago. In addition, a First year is • • • cystic fibrosis patient must go through two hours of therapy a day to · wondering where to go for morning · wondering were to buy The Cord help deal with the disease. announcements and it relies on 18% of its annual · trying to find out what a 'P1025-27' is A person with cystic fibrosis can · having your system blown apart by dining income from the event. This years · missing a class, and bringing a note from go on to lead a normal life but usually hall food national goal is $311,000. home finds it cut short. Very few live past . thinking that you can live on a budget of ·trying to get back to residence through the the age of 20. Those that do (about $25 a week, and spending four month's A person with cystic fibrosis can tunnel 18% of cystic fibrosis patients) are worth in Frosh Week go on to lead a normal life, but · presenting your meal card in the Torque only defying the odds with each · thinking GLOW is the campus' Thomas usually finds it cut short. When the Room additional day they live. It is cystic disease was first identified, patients Edison fan club · Wondering what the hell a Torque is . learning to recognize the Supercopmobile fibrosis research that has allowed only lived a year or two after birth. · walking by MacDonald House, and patients to live even this long. When Even today, very few live past the age at least 400 yards away wondering if it's a torture chamber cystic fibrosis was first identified of 20. Those who do (about 18% of · being intimidated by Supercop · trying to figure ot how you ever enjoyed patients would only live a year or two cystic fibrosis patients) are only · not washing your hand for a month after Kraft Dinner before after birth. defying the odds with each additional shaking Kevin Byers' hand ·refusing an OSAP loan, because you won't The Cystic Fibrosis Foundation day they live. · forgetting to write Mom and Dad, or... need it conducts research and runs clinics Research is the key to a longer life . writing Mom and Dad, and $ubStituting · promising yourself to go to the across Canada. It's only national expectancy for cystic fibrosis dollar $ign$ in a$ often a$ po$$ible weightroom everyday and get in shape fund-raising project is Shinerama patients. . they write back, saying they ¢an't take a · going to the weightroom, and being hint terrified by Doc Holliday, the 290 lb. football . waking up so hung over that even your hair player hurts . finding out what an all nighter is and · coming to school as an English major, wishing you hadn't and being so drunk for the English . marvelling at the number of Icebreakers Placement test that you wind up enrolling in that are named Don 'English as a Second Language' · counting the words in your essays · thinking you'll recopy all of your notes on · wondering who Sam Board is f the weekend · being amazed that every book your prof · signing up for 8:30 classes has written is a required text . starting the year in Honours Business, · seeing your underwear up in the dining phoning your parents six weeks later hall entolling the endless virtues you will . picking your courses by the description in Both McLean acquire by switching to Economics the calendar been involved with . going home at Christmas, announcing · being too embarrassed to leave when you past, and have that you have decided to switch from realized half way through you're in the for student Economics to Political Science wrong lecture brief biographical · finishing the year in General Phys. Ed. · waking up beside somebody,

Friday and Saturday "Dance ••• Dance ••• Dance" Fri. Cover $1 -Sat. Cover $2 No Cover Before 8 p.m. Proper Attire Please Surprise Happy Hour

A Gem of a Ruby's Night Spot TER._J;.flO 475 KING ST. N. CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 page 15

eel your · local M.P.

The only surprise in the riding of Parliament in 1979, and managed to Students Overseas (CUSO). He Waterloo following the landslide survive the Conservative crumble of moved to Nigeria, acting as the first \ttory cl. the Conservative Party on 1980. After being appointed to the Nigerian co-ordinator of CUSO, and Tuesday was the margin of victory Mulroney shadow cabinet, MacLean, the chaplain at the University of JOHN SIMPSON ccmmanded by Tory M.P. Walter in his role as Opposition Spokesman Nigeria. Prior to his election in 1979, K-W RECORD FOOD CRITIC Mean. for the Secretary of State, devel· McLean was a Waterloo alderman. THE PORTIONS ARE LARGE AND THE PRICES Mclean's margin of victory was an oped policies dealing with women's McLean's main distinguishing ARE LOW. 1510\Jnding 17,941 votes over feature is his involvement in TOP THIS WITH PLEASANT SERVICE AND llleral hopeful Lynn Myers, who Parliameotarians for World Order (PWO), an international network of QUAINT DECOR IN A RELAXING ATMOSPHERE -~ g1111ered 13,805 ballots. University AND YOU HAVE A REAL GEM AMONG LOCAL of Waterloo economist Bob legislatures working within a United Needham finished third with 10,271 Nations structure. The group is DINING ROOMS £ composed of some 929 P~rliamen · CAROL VERDUN .tlile Ubertarian Layne Kulcheki ELMIRA INDEPENDENT ~ trailed distantly, managing to sway tarians from around the world who - only 520 voters his way. are actively pursuing a path for world fHE SURPRISE ABOUT APHOI~USMS IS THAT j peace. McLean serves as the SUCH A LITTLE, UNASSUMING PLACE CAN For McLean, the victory was Treasurer of PWO. SERVE SUCH REMARKABLY FINE MEALS AT ~ thriUing", since he managed to fight John Reimer is a name that many BARGAIN PRICES. off the Uberal Frank Epp with only of us at WLU will recognize, since he has sat on the · WLU Board of Governors for the last four years. Born and raised in Kitchener, Reimer ======Aph(>risms======::. John Reimer possesses a PhD in History, and has 84-A KING N., WATERLOO (KING & BRIDGEPORT) taught at Conestoga College for over ten years. Arst elected to Parliament issues, youth concerns relating to HOURS: in 1979, he was defeated by Peter post-secondary educational funding. Tues., Wed. 11:30 a.m. - 9:00 p.m. Lang in 1980. During his short stint ...J!tcl.ean is Presbyterian minister, as an M.P., he sat on three Thurs., Fri., Sat. 11:30 a.m. - 10:00 p.m . serving in WaLerloo·s 1\nox Parliamentary Committees Gustice, Sunday 12:30 p.m. - 8:00 p.m Presbyterian Church from 197) ·79 . external affairs, and provincial •He was elected as the President relations). 886-2372 of the Canadian Federation of In this area, he has also served on Students following his university many community organizations days. This was followed up by his co· such as the Hospital Board and the Walter Mclean founding of Canadian University school board.

a scant margin of 154 votes in the What if? 1980 election. the mood of the delegates were A much more dramatic swing in We had the honour (?) of starting to swing, albeittoo late for ~tes was evidenced in Kitchener, attending the Uberal leadership Chretien. Nevertheless, we -M1ere Uberal incumbent Dr. Peter Canon convention on a press pass. wonder what may have happened Lang lost his seat to former M.P. When we snapped these photos, if he had emerged the victor. John Reimer. Reimer had surrendered the seat to Lang in 1980 [b~c~ hy I ,512 votes, but captured 26,448 SOLAR CALCULATOR on Tuesday to easily top Lang's 15.949. Kitchener is a traditionally e Solar Calculator Grit seat; it has been held by the e Ultra· Slim e 8 Digit Uberals since 1963. LCD e 3 Key Memory Both McLean and Reimer have Sale Price 15.95 been involved with Laurier in the F44 Sc:tentltlc Sale 14.99 past, and have expressed concern F-73P ProgrammatHe Sale 44.95 for student issues. Following is a FP-11 P SdenUflc Printer Sale 71.60 brief biographical summary of each Financial 10 06gtt man, and his accomplishments. Sale f·~ nd s Sept. :w ; gJ Sa le 35.80 'Natter McLean was first elected to Schendel "' ~ Stationery Limited Waterloo WL U er coming soon 886-7310 Wall Calendar and, for the first time, 120 KING STREETS ., WATERLOO OPEN DAILY TO 5:45P.M. The W.L.U.-er, Wilfrid Laurier Restaurants and Greasy Spoons, two summer issues of the Cord. Uruversity's Student Handbook, will Churches, Shopping, Getting The Pocket Planner is the other be arriving on campus next week. Around Town, and WLU Athletics to new addition to the Student Elipected to be here Friday, the name a few. ' Publications' list of products. The book is a student information guide This is the second year that the Pocket Planner is a thirteen-month to WLU and the Kitchener-Waterloo handbook has been published using calendar with one month filling two area. The book has expanded over its new format and title. However, it is pages. Also included in the book is a IIIII )'ear to include 96 pages. the first year that the editor of the section for personal numbers and i :;,ec~Jons in the book include: book was kept on full time over the emergency numbers. This planner 38 King St. N. WWSU ·Your Student Government, summer to publish not only the should be available on campus 'Mlat to Do in Waterloo, Bars, handbook but the Pocket Planner, today. Waterloo p.m. (1 bloCk north of Erb) ®. "HO~ OF THE FOLDED.-OVER PIZZA" only 99( " delivery Ft~ST You ~oc.l) "'Tlif PA~R charge IA.J HAL- on campus FREE witheach panzerotti 1 • delivered COKE on campus PICK-UP, EAT-IN OR HOME DELIVERY 885·2740 Mon. TUft.-Thura. Fri. 4 p.m.-12 p.m. 11 :3().12:00 11 :3().2 a.m. ~i Sat. 4 p.m.-2 a.m. Sun. 4 p.m.-10 p.m. page 16 CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 .etceter• to be ... to be.~. Friday, Sept. 7 Monday, Sept. 10 ·Wednesday, Sept. 12 Thursday, Sept. 13 Upcoming

THE SECOND day of ALL ARE welcome at the home of LUTHERAN CAMPUS Ministry THE TOYMAKER AND SON.will FRIDAY NIGHT at the REGISTRATION will begin at 9 Chaplain Paul Bosch for a picnic Service of Holy Communion by be presented in the T.A. at 8:00 will show Terms of ~"nno,,,.. a.m. and continue as long as from 4:30p.m.- 6:30p.m. at 157 Candlelight at 10 p.m. in the p.m. This drama co-sponsored at 8 p.m. in 1E1 on the 1 necessary. Time and place are Albert at Bricker, sponsored by Keffer Chapel. A coffee hour will by the Laurier Christian September. j indicated on Permit to Register. the Lutheran Student Movement. follow. Fellowship and the Navigators of Laurier will cost only $3 for COR VISA REVIEW and renewal for FALL LECTURES will begin. Thursday, Sept. 13 students and $4 for adults. For TRINK Visa students from 9 a.m. to 4 more info. please call Mary CLASSIFIED p.m. in the P.M.C. Tuesday, Sept. 11 Palmer at 886-9694. FILM STUDIES screening will . MUSIC AT NOON will present AN INTERVIEW SKIL~ MIME AND MAGIC: An show Paul Tomkowicz: Street Barry Cabena at the organ in the Workshop will be held on Fri adventure into the Unknown will COME TO the Mature- Students Railway Switchman at 2:30 p.m. Keffer Memorial Chapel. All are September 14 in Room P1 start at 8 p.m. in the T.A. Meeting from 12:00- 1:30 p.m. in in 2E7. welcome. from 2:30 p.m. to 4 ' the Wilson Lounge. Sponsored PRE-SHINERAMA DANCE will by CounsellinQ Services. be held in the Turret at 8 p.m. ALL OFF-CAMPUS r=ROSH have been matched to a senior Saturday, Sept. 8 student through a Buddy System classified process. If you are an off-campus SHINERAMA WILL start at 9 a.m. Frosh come to the Athletic and will work its way through ' Complex on Tuesday, Sept. 11, Stenographic Services Articles for Sale Peraonal Bualneaa the K-W area. at 6:30 p.m. You will meet your 'Buddy' at this time. QUALIFIED SECRETARY. Will VCR, Toshiba, 2 week/8 ANYONE INTERESTED FOOTBALL-SHINERAMA type anything from resume to program, remote, Beta, front­ Joining the WLU Figure Ska BOWL. The Laurier Golden ANYONE WHO signed up to be a thesis. IBM Selectric and load, 105 channel re~dy , 14 Club, please contact Laurie Hawks will host the Guelph 'Buddy' last year is to come to the Olympia Electric typewriter. Will channel programmable, 12tapes Debbie at 576-3256. Gryphons at 7 p.m. Admission Athletic Complex on Tuesday, edit and correct spelling. Will including head cleaner, 4 will be $2.00, but those with a Sept. 11, at6:30 p.m. to meet their supply paper. Call Pamela at 884- motors, warranty, $900 value, sell BAND MUSICIANS WANTEt Frosh t-shirt will be let in free. Frosh. Any questions? Call 884- 6913. $570, 884-5857. Anyone interested in joininf 3739. small band with some stude THE FINAL VOYAGE of the PROFESSIONAL TYPING Personal Business We are in need of a·bass guitar Starship Laurier- with Cairo will Wedneaday, Sept. 12 Services. Usually 1 day services woodwind, brass, and gu take place in the Turret at 8 p.m. - we do emergencies. Call 885- players. It's for fun! Please 2230 & ask for Lisa. CAMPUS SHIRT Company. Mike at 884-9741 or Joe at PLACEMENT ORIENTATION Custom-crested sportswear, 2051 . Sunday, Sept. 9 Session for Graduating Students TYPING- 15 years experience, quality made at wholesale prices. from 10- 11 a.m. in the P.M.C. IBM Selectric, fast service 886- Also available buttons, caps, Personals THE ECUMENICAL CAMPUS 4902 Anne glassware, other promotional Ministry will sponsor a Service of THE QUARTERBACK CLUB . items, plus Nike running shoes HEY GIRLS! B221 Little Hou Holy Communion by candlelight luncheon will be held at the Cars for Sale all sizes and styles (subject to open (just ask for Bruce - in the Keffer Memorial Chapel, Waterloo Inn at 12 noon. availability in Canada). Call Jeff supply your needs). Satisfac Albert and Seagram Drive. Dean VW SUNBUG: 58,000 miles. · Dessau 885-4235. Guaranteed. Delton Glebe will be preaching at FILM STUDIES Screening will $2250.· Phone 743-8694 after 4 11:00 a.m. show Capital in 2E7 at 2:30 p.m. p.m. SIX WEEKS in flashback - K-W SERVICES for the nights; red light district; dieti Physically Disabled is in need of no running - good intenti volunteers to help out in their fall though; sex lingerie held by program. If you wish to get O.P.P. officers; Scoobi & Yog1 involved to share your time for a to the beach; male.s - friend few hours a week during the day -?; birth of a watermel or evening, please call 885-6640 dodging landlords' visits; between 9-5. bedhead visits, McDonald's Watch out Pants -- have we g THE K-W Board of Basketball surprise for you ! Thanks for officials is recruiting new laughs-- be sure to at leasts referees for the 1984-85 season. me a blank post card. I'll k Educational meetings begin who it's from. Mum. Monday, September 10, and " HON"- love you M.T.L. see1 continue every Monday from 7-9 in Kiddee school! The sore Ia> p.m. at St. Michael's school, 64 University Ave. W., across from TO MY new roomie: here's W.L.U. For more information, terrific year, full of fun, foodt Orientation ActiVities contact lan Dewar at 579-2376. good cheer. I know the rhyr111 not too great, but there'll anottJer at a later date. (Y T-SHIRTS September '84 poetic and entertaining trier SWEATSHIRTS Special Entertainment while you wait in line at the Bell HATS TO THE man, with the bea Sept. 4- 15 Bell Phone Centre! Musicians * Magicians * RUGGER SHIRTS Here's to a more 'normal' ye­ Draws* Clowns* Comedians FOOTBALL SHIRTS Hope you recover from y BASEBALL SHIRTS summer (clean our offia Don't forget to pick up your Uptown "Grab Bag" POLO SHIRTS full of valuable gifts and coupons from the SPORT SHIRTS DIANE C: Here's hoping to­ merchants of Uptown Waterloo! TURTLE NECKS cheerful new year without HOCKEY SHIRr; new cats to fear. May ally The "19 Minute Workout" ... Every noon hour we Custom printed for your GOLD~CYM . obsessions come true! Da will present an aerobics demonstration (co­ Team, club, frat, class, (sans Jay.) Sept. 10- 15 sponsored by Gold's Gym) and an active-wear floor, or house ROOMIE DEAR: Do not fear fashion show ... Four more ... three more ... student discount prices will go well even our hot w• Lorne Merkur and Sister Inc. won't smell. And if there's a["':tL~ Check this week's is~ue .of the Imprint or Cord Custom Silkscreen Designs echos near, Lucky you will ha Ili-..l!~oo_illlli:!!.._-.-..~~..-::~:._1 Weekly for our special Issue of Waterloo Town 1801 Avenue Rd., Toronto no whines to hear; Remember Sept. 13,14 Square News packed full of values for students only! (416) 781-6155- patient ear, will keep tile at# Sale ends Sept. 22. Call Collect swell. ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• The Great Canadian Paper Airplane Contest - co­ .- sponsored by Labatt's Look for your official entry form ...... in the Square ... fold your · ~THINK CORD favourite paper airplane design and come on down • to Waterloo Town Square to compete for prizes and trophies ... the big question is: will it fly'm CLASSIFIEDS Spectacular Savings! Act now and take advantage of Free Cord Classifteds. Hunyl This is a limited time offer• .Monday noon please • ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ._ ..t. A ..: .. 4...... a.& a ....&4~- -.. ~~---.-.-.-~-.-. ~.--.-.-.-.-g-.-~---.-.-.--..-:- ...-.-.~-.- .-.-.--~-.-...-.-.-; ..4 TERVIEW SKIL p will be held on F r 14 in Room P :30 p.m. to 4 \::;~:.; 'It'"-, t: . ~,·::::·. .. . .~ · ~:;.. \~· .·.:r. ' .. , .!~ ·.:·.•::.:J )/' I ./ /,? // / //~ ~/ ~

. :: .I ~~~- -,

~... :;- ·.::-:. .... r'"' .·.. . •f'?'. 'frt

.:·· ~:· .. "A.<:::;:~ ?y /I 8221 Little House I ask for Bruce - ~ - / r needs). Satic:f"'"'i'"• @/ / r./':.~7 in flashback light district; d ~·~ g - good intent lingerie held by ... rs; Scoobi & Yogi go ..... ; males - friend or· of a watermelon - dlords' visits; its, McDonald's .. Pants -- have we got a you ! Thanks for the sure to at least semi k post card. I'll . Mum. Thespians unite!

by Ruth Demeter F~ 1·9. "Midsummer Night's If you're interested enough in Dream" will be set in the round, and drama to understand the headline, or Dr. O'Dell plans some fascinating even if you're not, Theatre Laurier alterations to the production that probably has something you'll like should make it an experience for this year. actors, stage hands, and audience Here's hoping for a (Jnder the direction d Dr. Leslie alike. year without any O'Dell, drama at Laurier is making Auditions for the Shakespearean fear. May all your leaps and bounds. This year, with play will be held in October. come true! Daisy three major productions planned, Rehe!lrsals will continue through will undoubtedly be one d Laurier's 1]U~~ November, with a break for finest Christmas and exams, retumings to EAR: Do not fear, al The best part about what's a more strict rehearsal schedule in I even our hot water available this year is that the variety January. I. And if there's no should accommodate all interests. Lucky you will have · Besides the fact that the three It cannot be stressed enough that hear; Remember: a productions are very different, there all are encouraged to audition for ,, will keep life at #307 are opportunities to leam with whatever facet c:J theatre draws you. professionals in all areas of theatre O'Dell hopes to have enough production. turnover to allow each cast to be The first production, "Crimes d different, and to allow as many the Heart," is a comedy with a twist the English department to book These opportunities are relatively people to receive professional The first play d Beth'Henley, it has times. new to Laurier,and are available guidance as possible. won the Pulitzer Prize and the New Make an appoiotment for an largely through the efforts of O'Dell. Those who saw "The Rimers of York Drama Critic Circle award. audition if you are interested in any Professionals have been hired for set Eldritch" last year should be There are four parts for women and aspect of the production. There will design · and production, and a prepared for more creative and exciting theatre, and those who two for men. The play centres on be opportunities during the year to professional lighting designer will weren't able to be involved should three sisters and the influence that work on such things as stage also be participating in the most certainly "act'' now, with so their grandfather has had on their direction, production, lighting, and productions. It is a great opportunity many opportunities available. lives. First auditions are on set design, as well as anything else to work with and learn from Corne to the theatre! Wednesday and Thursday, you ean think ef that's involved in a professionals, and aU are welcome. September 12 and 13. Phone or visit theatre productio. · The second play will be presented CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 page 18 Will going out on a limb [,Mtertainnlent leave Helen's • budget in limbo? I What's on .in town Jane Siberry On Vinyl Iby Usa Schildroth tickets are $).00. Incidentally, the 13th as well. film has English subtitles, so you can Andre Gagnon will be coming to ' Summer may be over, but that leave your "Learn to Speak Italian" the Humanities Theatre on Oct 12, doesn't mean that your entertain­ books at home. as will the Nylons on Oct. 26 and 27. ment calendar will suffer. There are Now a plug for our own Art lovers will also be able to many theatrical productions, con­ production. The Laurier Christian choose from a fine selection d certs and art exhibits to take in this Fellowship will present Toymaker exhibits. The Kitchener-Waterloo Art fall which will help make first term & Son at the Theatre Auditorium on Gallery is presenting a selection d less painfuL Sept 13 at 8:30 p.m. Tickets are German expressionist prints from The UniVersity of Waterloo is $4.00 for the general public and McMaster University's fine art Introduce yourself to the money-saving goods and services in offering a variety of productions, $3.00 for students. collection. The exhibit is open 110\\ Uptown Waterloo. Show your university student i.d. to receive including both comedy and drama. Towards the end of the month, until Sept 16. your Uptown Waterloo grab bag at any one of the First up is Bartleby, running from you can catch David Copperfield at An exhibit of paintings by Victorian establishmentS listed below. Sept. 8-- to 11 in Hagey Hall, Room the Centre in the Square on Sept. 23 Canadian painter William Blair Bruce 108. Comedy takes over on Sept. 12 and take in the Air Farce at the is also being shown at the galle!) CONTENTS with the Comedy Show, featuring the Humanities Theatre on the 27th. until Oct 21, as part of a large • PEN • MATCHBOOK ever-popular Yuk-Yuks, at the Turning to concerts, the exhibit entitled Pictures For The • INFORMATIQN • MONEY-SAVING COUPONS • "CHURCH KEY' • DISPOSABLE SHAVER Campus Centre Great HaiL Parachute Club will be in town on Parlour: The English Reproductive • SALE Ft.YERS • RECIPE BOOKLET Admission is an amazingly low Sept 12 for a free outdoor concert Print 1775-1900. by Peter J. Lear • COASTERS $2.00, so you really can't miss. Kitchener's own reggae band, Don't think for a minute that this~ Later on in the month, the musical Messenjah, will be performing on a complete list of entertainmen The album (under comedy Country Hearts takes the Sept 13 at the Waterloo Motor Inn. events. I have barely scratched the ouRS Street Records) is stage at the Humanities Theatre, and Ticket prices for this concert are set surface. There are many more just Borders Here, which oc1 'l ~' runs from Sept. 18 to 22. at $6.50 for UW Student Federation waiting to be discovered. Keep \00~'· Lovers of opera might want to take members and $7.50 for others. Jane checking the Cord, and phone the true of this effort by in a screening of the film La Traviata, Sibbery (of "Mimi On The Beach" ticket offices for more information There is a large degree O.W. SPORTS, 92 King St. S. also at the Humanities Theatre. The fame) will be at the Breslau on the here. I don't know AU BABA STEAK HOUSE, 130 King St. S, Siberry's music to, PDR PICTURE FRAMES, 112-1/2 King St. S. classify it. There are Y~ KEYBOARD CENTRE, 13 King St S. new wave influences, SCHENDEL STATIONERY, 120 King St. S. ACADEMY OF DANCE, 8B King St N. call it? BRONCO SHOES, 12 Bridgeport Rd. E. It's certainly WORDS WORTH BOOKS, 88 King St S. The music seems GALLERY INDIGENA, 22 Dupont St E. within, as do STAG SHOP, 7 King St N. She tells us why CUT f, DRIED HAIR CARE, 82 King St. S, BENTS CAMERAS, 96 King St S. "The Waitress" - . MOTHER'S PIZZA PARLOUR, 28 King St N. be famous now if I WATERLOO TOWN SQUARE good waitress." TRINrTY JEWELLERS, 22 King S. !·I St. I Her imagination "Symmetry (The Way To Be)." Everythi symmetiy, no matter or so the lyrics SUCIQe:s, all of the tracks

Weleoate to Waterloo

1458 Weber St. East 324 Highland Rd.W est 893-6131 744-6311

28 KING ST. NORTH 886-1830 ''Come on home to a real meal''

------I Two dollars off any ~Z·slice: OFF pizza or la~nily size • r $2.00 Authentic Chicago Style • Please, just one coupon per order • Offer not valid on Wednesday special Deep Dish Pizza • Present coupon when paying Oller Valid Sept. 6 to Oct. 4, ~984 ~------~ ------CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 l entertain!rient I The Razor Edge

I Men's & Women's Hairstyling isc Men $7.00 Women $7.50 Backstage Complete with Blow Dry by Ruth Demeter Jane Siberry Monday - Closed w Welcome to Laurier. You are probably sick of hearing that by Oa Vinyl now, aren't you? It's true though, we're glad you're here. If you were Tuesday-Friday - 8:30-6:00 ell. around in the summer, you can empathize with what a nice feeling Saturday - 8:00-3:30 ~ agnon will be coming to it is to have a full campus again. ·ties Theatre on Oct. 12, In case you haven't figured out what I'm doing here on this page, ylons on Oct. 26 and 27. I am Ruth Demeter and I am your entertainment editor. Once you 28 University Ave. East rs will also be able to have survived the thrill/horror of Orientation (whether or not you're Across from Church's Fried Chicken ~om a fine selection of a frosh, it's a pretty wild experience), I hope to help you be amused Kitchener·Waterloo Art and enthralled by various events on and off campus. 886-2060 ~senting a selection of Be sure to read my cover story on Theatre Laurier. For those of ~>xpressionist prints from you who aren't sure, "thespian" is not a dirty word. It means acting, University's fine art and in this case it also means anything that has to do with drama. The exhibit is open now Leslie O'Dell is providing some terrific opportunities to learn from 16. professionals in all spheres of theatre · acting, producing, set of paintings by Victorian · design, lighting, or whatever else you feel up to. 1ter William Blair Bruce During the course of the year, this column will hopefully (I have Happy Hour shown at the gallery big dreams) focus on many different aspects of entertainment. I noon to 7 p.m. , as part of a larger am not just talking song and dance here kids. I am talking meat 2 for 1 draught Pictures For The (other than nude photography). There are things about this town Reproductive that are really great for people who like good bands, theatre, by Peter J. Lear museums, art, and books. There are also some pretty crummy for a minute that this is things like underfunding, and poor organization, and passe disco, list of entertainment and boring literature. Happy times, eh? ecJlJesct. barely scratched the The album (under the label Duke lJights ely Since I have a column, I can write about this stuff anytime I want ·1\~"1!> "" are many more just Street Records) is called No to (this is power). However, I need writers and photographers and l.aclies• • ilre be discovered. Keep Borders Here, which is certainly "'" poets and artists, and anyone with a flair for entertainment in some ~'b-'i lJJg}]ts Cord, and phone the true of this effort by Ms. Siberry. ~~ 'b-~ facet. Perhaps you can draw graphics for my poetry page, or even • -5840 To Be)." Everything falls into near the games room, which is right near the lV lounge, all of s~metry, no matter how you fight it, which are very fun places (trust me). or so the lyrics suggest. The lyrics in I'm looking forward to meeting you, and hearing what you have all of the tracks are unusual at to say, because really, what is entertainment if you can't share it times - to most humans I'm sure with someone? that it's most of the time. (I promise I won't be this sappy ever a~ain.) Lyrics are not all there 1s to· Siberry's work, however. The instrumental portions also stand up well under scrutiny. A mixture of guitar, bass, keyboards and :~~1t ~ percussion proves very pleasing, and Jane's voice works as another instrument. The layers in some of the music are rich, in particular on "Mimi On keyboards. Credit must also be given intentionally. More refinement is The Beach," a song about the to John Switzer, Key Myhr, AI Cross, necessary. idiosyncrasies at the beach and in Doug Wild, Jon Goldsmith and Rob It is only Siberry's second album the locker room. Yale, all of whom provide Siberrywith (her first was an independent Siberry is responsible for all of the solid sound. release), and overall, it lends il'lCS and music, as well as some of The album isn't perfect. Some credibility to her career. With talent me mstrumentals on guitar and tracks are a bit choppy, perhaps like this, fame is definitely on its way. Rd. West 311 Hey Students!

Watch for the WLUer, Laurier's student handbook This invaluable guide to life at the university is available to you FREE OF CHARGE within the next week Noteworthy items: GOOD TIMES - your guide to entertainment in Kitchener-Waterloo. Written by a well-informed and creative individual (your entertainment editor!), it contains reviews of restaurants and bars of all types. HOUSING· everything you wanted to know about leases and stuff. tyle There are many other incredibly exciting things, too numerous to mention, so do yourself a favour and pick one up! ~-4------J page 20 CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984

All poetry submissions should by Theresa Kelly Dear Poem be brought to The Cord Weekly Football season is l office to Ruth Demeter, Golden Hawks begin schedule on Satur Against the death of us, Entertainment Editor. Please shate your thoughts. exhibition game my dear, Gryphons. The two I have stocked veniso·n

to nourish what we have, to keep us ever looking startled, window eyed, shanks shivering in the mornng's mist.

And we wake and you run for the love of running forgetting the chase doe-quick forgetting the chased love-lost forgetting those who chase your body pressed close and warm against their sites.

Against the death of all my dear, my dear, I may have to share the kill.

I may have to eat you. But your memory shall stick to my teeth.

J. David Black

Smoke

The sulfurous strip of wood Struck against a noisy Cardboard education offer Flaming red and warm (1 Match is lit. Team The small thin burning stick of Weed and filter Yellow-staining packaged Cigarette is in his hand.

White curls of stinking Putrid polluting Offending and poisoning Smoke work their way to my lungs.

It hits the shining metal Cheap dirty filled to what is left of the brim Ashtray And it is done

But the damage has just begun. A Historical Event

Ruth Demeter History last season Is nauseating to avenge this A painful record of every single mistake Cnmmittee has All the lives lost the occassion. All the food wasted WLU head All the lives gone wrong Newbrough, is game can help History's music. History's music campaign reach lickets for the A record has only two grooves; everyone. Frosh The same music is played t·shirts get in free. Why did we say such nasty things? _Over and over again Why did you make me cry? Newbrough is a school ;ott... n.~;orlr .. When we loved each other so much?. Man will never change. Why did we just say good-bye? the Ruth Demeter one of despite the Jackie K. Riddell coRb ' ~V~y. ~p~lnbt!i'7: t984 page 21

:~;::

~::~X ::~· }:; SPO awks ready to soar should by Theresa Kelly the Shinerama Bowl, which gives a ... a Weekly Football season is upon us as the both teams a chance to try their Golden Hawks begin their 1984-85 players in different positions prior to Please' schedule on Saturday with an their respective season openers the exhibition game against the Guelph following Saturday. Gl)'phons. The two teams _meet in This year's squad features over forty returning players from the 6-1 , 1983 Hawks. This fact has given Head Coach Rich Newbrough reason to be confident about the team as he marks his coaching debut Two players-Alex Troop and Kris Keillor were selected for the Third Annual CIAU pre-season All Canadian team. Troop, a third year linebacker was a OUM and CIAU all­ star in 1983. Keillor, an offensive linesman was the OUM Rookie of - the Year in 1982 and an OUM all­ star in 1983. The only real weak areas at this time are the defensive line where two starters and their back ups have graduated, and the kicking game. The Montreal Concordes currently Alex Troop hold the playin~ riqhts to former Hawk kicker Roy ·Kurtz , who finished second last year in the scoring race. Although Kurtz has expressed an interest in returning to Laurier, the Concordes do not wish to release him from his contract, even though he has seen little playing time. For the first time in ten years, the kicking duties will be split among two players, which makes the kicking game less reliable. Dave Lovegrove, who has returned for another season will more than likely be the team's punter. Other returning players include: running backs Randy Rybansky and Courtney Taylor, quarterback Mike Wilson, centre Nolan Duke, CIAU rookie sensation Paul Nastasiuk. This year's training camp was ;quite successful, according to Kris Keillor Newbrough as he predicts a stronger contender this season because of • A good pick the added strength in many of the positions. All the teams in the OUM The football Hawks pared down their roster and trained extensively over the past few weeks in look stronger and according to preparation for Saturday's game. Not only will it mark the head coaching debut of Rich Newbrough, but scouting reports which will make the the Hawks are also determined to avenge for handing them their only loss of last season's regular league more competitive. McMaster season. Team hopes and Guelph will have virtually the same teams as last season, and Western looks ready to rebound after defense. "We'll take whatever the their passing game as well as the arrived on campus tor another to shine a disappointing finish in 1983. defense gives us," he said indicating running game. season. Because of the improvement within that he is confident in the team's The team has three captains this Newbrough will be assisted by 2 the OUM, Newbrough commented ability to pass the football. Most season-Alex Troop, Nolan Duke, full-time coaches and four part-time that, "I don't think anyone can go teams play Laurier with a 8 or 9 man and Randy Rybansky. Troop and coaches during the football season. Exhibition football takes on an undefeated this season." front line, expecting a running Duke were selected as captains in Tom Amott !!ftd Gary Jeffries will act added element of competition on The offensive attack for 1984 formation. Instead, Newbrough the spring practices because as offensive line coach and defensive Saturday as the Shinerama Bowl should be similar to 1983 as the plans to throw the defense off Newbrough felt it would provide the coordinator respectively. Brad Hall, tops off a day of fund-raising for Hawks will alternate the running and balance by passing enough so that team with leadership during the head Dave Rose, Ed Dietrich and Harry cystic fibrosis. The game features the passing game depending on the the opponents will begin to respect coaching uncertainty. Rybansky was Doering wit also be present on the Laurier Golden Hawks against the added as a captain rece~ when he sidelines. University of Guelph Gryphons at 700 p.m. at Seagram Stadium. The two teams have enjoyed a

However, the Gryphons ended the Hawks' unbeaten streakatsixgames , Women~s soccer debuts last season and the Hawks will want by Theresa Kelly single mistake to ave~e this loss. The Shinerama Women at Laurier have finally past His enthusiasm about· soccer two exhibition games against the purchase of game balls, and hiring of has donated a trophy for found something to kick around: Comrrutt~ should help the team through the Waterloo Juniors, a talented Ioc~l referees. the occasston. . soccer balls. This season marks the difficult times. dub team on September 10 and 13 The eleven starting positions are WLU head . football coach, Rich debut of women's varsity soccer at The team finds itself in afinancial at Bechtel Park in Waterloo. Their still open and any interested players Newbrough, ts confident the WLU. The team will participate in a ~at bind as this first season opens. The limited budget will provide some should contact the AC. or Horace game can help the Stunerama six·member inter-university interested players have to be willing funds for transportation, field rental, Braden for more information. campaign reach its $5,000 goal. exhibition league. - to make some monetarysacriticesin Ttekets for the game a~ $2 for As is the case in most new varsity order to prove their dedication to this everyone. Frosh with their Frontier sports, the team will compete in a new sport at Laurier. The athletic t·shirts get in free. Sanction B league. This administration, while not negative Newbrough is also hoping to set a classification requires at least one full about the development of new Hawks tackle Gryphons school attendance record of 4000 at season of exhibition games in order sports, finds itself appearing to be the the game. Football: is traditionally to qualify for full varsity status. 'heavy'. This cautious attitude has ooe of Laurier's stronger sports Instead of a regular league developed because of past despite the school's small size in championship, the teams will experiences when some new teams Seagram Stadium comparison with the University of · compete in an eight-team have lost interest by mid-season and Toronto or Western. Last season the tournament at Guelph. have withdrawn from their leagues. If Saturday Hawks finished first in the OUM with The team is being coached by the team manages to stay together a 6-1 record, and are hoping for Horace Braden, Director of Student until the second season, the athletic 7:00 p.m. another successful season. Awards. Braden has been involved in budget will be more willing to As the Hawks do not play their first many aspects of soccer: as a referee, accomodate them. See you there! home game of the regular season promoter of youth soc<;er in the Laurier will compete against York, llltil September 29, the Shinerama community and now as a head Brock, Guelph, Western and Bowlprovidesanearlyopportunityto coach. He has also worked with McMaster. Prior to the seven-game see the Hawks in action. WLU's men's soccer team in the regular season, the Hawks will play ------

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page 22- CORD WEEKLY Friday, September 7, 1984 page 23 spo Buy One Dessert Get· Seeond for Free: Soccer Hawks fly sout~ by Theresa Kelly CREPES CHERRY JUBILEE HOT FUDGE SUNDAE The men's sOccer Hawks kick off The week long training camp Andros Neocleos (W.C.L) and Marl)! Whole black brand1ed chernes spooned Rich and thkk hot fudge, ice cream and their 1984-85 season south of the Donner (Eastwood) are all expecte: over folded crepes Inside the crepes - a whipped cream topped off with featured quality-not-quantity soccer creamy cheese fill ing with a hmt of almond · walnuts border this week. The Hawks play which is indicative of the high levels to made strong contributions to til Si served hot with or without Ice cream .. $2.99 four exhibition games against of ball-handling skills in the Ontario team. Syracuse, Cornell, University of Youth soecer j:>rcigrams. Although the Hawks have lost th After a week of CHOCOLATE MINT WORLD'S GREATEST Rochester and the Rochester services of standout goaltende Vanilla ice cream in a crepe served with m10t BANANA SPLIT Institute of Technology in The team had a few scares off the Eymbert Vaandering, they are no group to another, you and chocolate sauce, whipped cream and A banana · cut in half. a minimum of three preparation for their twelve-game field just prior to the opening of without a quality replacement Slel! an individual. First creme de menthe $2 49 kinds of ice cream. walnuts, marshmallow, alphabetical group hot fudge sundae, whipped cream, and CXlM season. camp when Lyon was rushed to the Webb returns for a final season an: topped with a cherry . The team currently carries hospital due to hemorrhaging. He or artsies. So now that CREPES SUZETTE 30 will act as team captain. players, including 14 freshmen who was able to return for the last two The Hawks finished third in til every possible division, This traditional favourite combines a zest of all: us and them. of orange, ~m o n juice and orange brandy made the trip to the U.S.. Coach days of camp and is now feeling like CXlM West last season, advancif! folded in three crepes. Sprinkled Wlth By now, you've been Barry Lyon plans to cut the team to his old self. He praises the combined to post season play, before losing H confectionary sugar Served piping hot with university in this town - or without Ice Cream $2_99 23 players for the regular season. efforts of assistant coach Bob Brown to McMaster in their CXlM Wes According to Lyon the team is strong and senior players Steffan Kerry, semifinal. Lyon predicts thi university in town. You at midfield and stronger than ever in Barry Maclean and lan Drake who McMaster and defending OUN buddies - the ones MAPLE WALNUT DELIGHT once they become Coffee, chocolate and maple waln ut ice the forward positions. took control of the situation during champ Western will be the teams i cream, chocolate suace and fudge sauces The weak area will be defense, as his absence. beat. With only two playoff spl

WLU at McMaster September 15 at 2:00 p.m. Intra Men's Soccer

WLU vs Waterloo MEN'S September 15 at 1:00 p.m. Budd Park Activity

WLU vs McMaster Soccer September 16 at 1:00 p.m. Tennis Tournament Budd Park Volleyball Footbaii-Touch WLU vs Western Ice Hockey September 19 at 7:00 p.m. (Helmet & face nrr't"""''" Budd Park mandatory) Singles Squash T Women's Soccer WOMEN'S WLU vs Waterloo Juniors September 10 at 4:30 p.m. Soccer 3 LUCKY STUDENTS WILL EACH WIN A BRONCO! Bechtel Park Tennis Tournament ARST DRAW DATE: OCTOBER 17, 1984 SECOND & THIRD DRAWS: NOVEMBER 28, 1984, FEBRUARY 20, 1985 Volleyball WLU vs Waterloo Juniors Residence vu''"''''Ueanng sut11Crent postage NOTE ONLY ONE ENTRY PER ENVELOPE I ~ Volleyball [ntues ~urd oe motled to MAkE SOMEONE HAPPY LONG DISTANCE CONTESt lOX 1461 $TAT10N A. TOIONtO. ONaRIO M5W 2EI 1 I I I ) l I I ) I I I ; ) 3 Thefe w 1o be o toter at three (3) prl/es awarded (see Rule 4 !Of pr~te a.srnouliOn) Each prl/e WTII cortSJSt of o 985 Ford Standard Sfonco 11 Curling w1lh all srondmd equ•pment plus rne lollow•ng optiOnS H D oonerv AM radiO llnled gloss outomotJC locktng hubS deluxe ru tone pa•m guoge :Monday thru package Approx•mote reta•• va1ue S13 245 eocn Local deuvery prov•nc•ol and mun•c1pol taxes os opphcable ore 1ncluded os part aline prLZe at 2 [ I I ) [ I I ) I I I I ) no cost rome w•nnet" Ort\fet'S permrt •nsuronce and ven Et ie hcense WTII oe The resp()OSlbi''Y ol eoch w'nnet" Each vehiCle Will be delivered to rne Friday Ford deoter neorest lt'le w•nner s res.dence rn Canada A•l prrzes WTI; be awarded Only one prlle per person Prlles musJ be accepted as CO-ED awarded no SubS!tfullOns Pr1tes w•ll be dehvefed ro The w•nners os QutCkty as Clfcumstonces perm•! Pr1zes may not oe exactly as Illustrated 3 [ I I ) I I I ) I I I I ) 4 RondOfn selectiOns w'H be mode tram ott entr•es rece•ved by me contest JUdg•ng OJgan~totiOn on October 17 1984 November 28. 1984 and me 12-1:30 conies! ciOs•ng dote Febfuory 20 1985 Pr11es w•tl oe oworded os toiiO'NS one (I) Stanco 11 WTI\ be awarded !rom on entrieS Jecerved by NOON Water Fitness "iorne Octooet 17 Novembef 28 1984 and februarv 20 1985 respectTVely Enhres other man the w•nn•ng one '"the Qc•ooer 17 draw w111 automQfJcatty 4-5 ne rntered fOf The Novemt>er 28 1984 draw Entues otner than ftle WJnn•ng one lfllt'le November 28 1984 draw WTII outomaflcatty be entered tor Scuba me !rna• draw February 20 1985 Chances at w•nnrng are dependent upon lt'le totot numbef ol entrieS recewed os ot eoch draw The drown 9·10:30 Address Apt enTTanrs •n Ofdef to WTn w1U be requued ro hrst correctly answef on a11fhmef1COI sk•ll-testrng quesfiOn w•lt'ltn o pre--determrned 11me hmlf Stnlke Improvement Oec•SJOns of the contest OJgan•zahon Shall be l•nol By entenng w•nners agree to ltle use ol fhe•r nome OOdr~ al\d phOtograph tor resulting puo••Cif'v •n c.:onneclton WJitlltltS contest The wrnne-s wilt alsO be reqwroo to SIQn a tegot document staflng compliance Wlltl the conlesf ruleS Learn to Swim ''V Pmv The names ot the wrnnefs may be oblo•ned by send1ng o stomped sell odd1essed envelope to Telecom Conodo 40 Lau11er Ave W Room Beginner Squash 950 Bo• '140 Srotoon 0 Ollowa Olllar.a KIP 6H5 Saturdays lei No 5 Th•s contest 1s open only to students or me oge of mo1onty rn the prOVInce .n wl'l•Chltley re5Jde whO o1e reg,stered tun hme at onv accrediTed Conoamn Untvl!l's•rv College or Post Secondary JnstrfUIIOn EmplOyees otletecom ConOdo rts,membef companieS anclltletr otfthotes ltle11 (Wilere you con oe reoclled l Odvertrs•ng and ptomofiOOOI ogeocle5 The •ndepeodent conies! OfQOTlllOI'()Il and lhe•r •mmedJQ!e rommes (mother lather SISters t>rotners NOON4 fXJ Kung Fu spouse and cMdren) ore nQf eiiQrble ThiS contest rs SUbJect to on Fedet"o• Prov•nc101 and Mun•c1pallows ~ollegeor UntverSJiy Anend•ng ------Yoga 6 Oueoec Residents 7fXJ-9:00 1hove read the contest rules and agree to ab1de by them Allto•es ~llg•D'e undef me LOI sur tes IOterleS •es courses ·es concours pub1tclfo1res ettes apaletts Long Distance Dance Exercise d amusements l'lo...e been paid A comptomtrespectrng fhe odmmrslfol1on olttus ~;ontest may oe Ball Room Dance su0m1ned to IT'le Rt!gte des IOIC11es et courses du Oueoec 7; /. ,/. Sundays 1 'IIIIIr• 1 Sqnolure ------. A long diStonce COlliS 0 completed COli outside me enrront s de51gnorec tree COIItng area IP/Ptom unaui ------NOON4fXJ CORD WEEKLY Friday. September 7. 1984 sports sout Covering ~ Neocleos (W.C.I.) and Ma~ theHawks (Eastwood) are all expected So you like sports. Well, that's the strong contributions to the Sideli_ne first step to becoming a by Theresa Kelly writer/photographer for the Cord the Hawks have lost the sports section. People are needed to of standout goaltender After a week of orientation activities and being shuffled from one cover many of the sports. Vaandering, they are nd group to another, you probably feel more like an ID number than There are a wide variety of sports a quality replacement Steo.t an individual. First you're a number, then you're part of an at Laurier, but due to lack of interest for a final season and alphabetical group (A·K, L·Z), then you're divided into biz whizzes in some areas, the sports section fails captain. or artsies. So now that you probably think that you've mastered to give a comprehensive account of every possible division, there's one more that is the most important finished third in the all of them. By having people last season, advancing of all: us and them. interested in one particular sport play, before losing 1.() By now, you've been made painfully aware that there is a second share their enthusiasm with the rest in their OUM West university in this town · which some people think is the only of the students, it can only generate university in town. You probably will disassociate with your old Lyon predicts that I more interest in that sport buddies - the ones who had the misfortune to choose U of W - and defending OUM In· particular, writers/photogra· Pregnant \\l/..,.,tem will be the teams tD once they become brainwashed into thinking that their school is the phers are required to cover men's and only two playoff spots superior one in this town. And eventually you get the this·town-ain't·big· soccer, hockey, women's basketball season, every game wil enough-for-both-of-us syndrome. and volleyball, rugby, basketball, need help? to the Hawks as they football and volleyball. There are also CROWN Birthright is - reach the playoffs. The rivalry between ·the two school became even more intense many minor sports that require an emergency will return to Budd Park during a basketball game last January. For those of you who were busy Pregnancy Service some special attention from an CLEANERS giving friendly for their home games at your local high school learning calculus, we'll just say that there was interested spectator-including 65 University Ave. E. attention and The condition of the field contact made between two players (one of us, the other of them). One tennis, swimming, track, and curling. Waterloo (behind OTooles) free practical to Centenniel Stadium of us suffered a broken cheekbone and one of them received a 5-game One area that the sports section help to any woman the extra distance to suspension which their coaches vehemently protested. See what who is pregnant can expand is in feature reporting. and in need of help. · games advantageous to brainwashing can do to someone? Features are generally one page in * Clean, modern Birthright is - the Cord, including pictures, charts, As the school vear beqins, the new confrontations between the laundromat free pregnancy graphs and graphics. Some possible tests. medical Hawks and Warriors should prove quite interesting. Despite their topics include: athletic injuries and Close to aid. legal larger size in terms ot land and people, they do not dominate the prevention, the increasing * advice. campus counselling. athletic circles in Waterloo, as one might assume. Our football participation of women in team Hawks have terrorized them from day one, winning the annual employment. sports, a profile of former Laurier baby & maternity contest for the last dozen years or so. Our hockey team has placed * Staffed at athletes who are enjoying success in all times clothing. higher in the standings than their team despite their new on· sports, and the problems of Birthright is - campus ice fields. Ditto with soccer. recruiting athletes for a smaller ~ - Listening with love and understanding Let's see some stats, you say. Okay, here are the 1983-84 OUAA university. own final standings: - help where help is needed The "sports section can expand - completely confidential Football- Hawks 1st, Warriors 6th (of 8) leaners to suit the interests of the readers. Birthright is - Soccer- Hawks 3rd, Warriors 6th (of 7) Informative and challenging features t priced drydeanlng - as close as your telephone ... Lowes In K-WI Hockey- Hawks 2nd, Warriors 7th (of 13) such as the Sports Quiz and Pretty impressive stats for a school 1/3 the size of theirs. Scoreboard have become traditions, ' 579-3990 talk Unfortunately, we have not managed to run them out of town in but without willing volunteers they Mon. · Fri. 8 a.m. · 9 p.m. 0 IRTHPJGHT Saturday 8 a.m. · 6 p.m. rugby, men's basketball aAd volleyball in which they won their also become last-minute pieces. Sunday 9 a.m. · 6 p.m. division. Their women's teams-the Athenas-have also enjoyed (Lost wash I hour befono closing · So if you like sports, why not make drycleamng hours end 1 hour before closing) success over their female counterparts at Laurier, but that's where t.'"te sports section reflect your own you come in. The Hawks need support to win for us. ideas, interests and even your name? Intramural Schedule ... a complete look of men's & ladies' casual MEN'S COMPETITIVE sportswear, footwear and accessories ... Activity Activity Begins Enby Deadline When and Where

Thu. 27 Sept. Wed. 19 Sept Thu. A.F. 7:00 p.m. ES Soccer main floor level Tennis Tournament Wed. 26 Sept Wed. 19 Sept Wed. T.C. 1:00 p.m. Volleyball Wed. 26 Sept Wed. 19 Sept Wed. A.C. 8:00 p.m. MARKET SQUARE Football-Touch Mon. '2 1Sept Wed. 19 Sept Mon. & Tue. A.F. 7:00p.m Ice Hockey Mon. 15 Oct Wed. 100ct Mon., Tue., Wed. (Helmet & face protection Waterloo Arena mandatory) 11 :00 p.m. - 1:00 a.m. Singles Squash Tournament Mon. 29 Oct. Fri. 26 Oct Mon. AC. 7:00 p.m. WOMEN'S COMPETITIVE

SOCcer Wed. 26 Sept I Wed. 19 Sept Wed. A.F. 7:00 p.m. Tennis Tournament Wed. 26 Sept Wed. 19 Sept Wed. T.C. 1:00 p.m. Volleyball Wed. 26 Sept Wed. 19 Sept Wed. AC. 8:00 p.m. Residence Volleyball Sun. 30 Sept Mon. 24 Sept Sun. AC. 7:00p.m. Singles Squash Tournament Mon. 290ct Fri. 26 Oct Mon. A.C. 7:00 p.m. CO·ED EVENTS Organizational Meeting (Special membership rates through Athletic Mon. Sept 24 Raquetball Department for Columbia Raquet Club) 7:00p.m. AC. Indoor Soccer Thu. 27 Sept Wed. 19 Sept Thu. AC. 8:00p.m. Softball - Slow Pitch Sun. 23 Sept Thu. 20 Sept Sun. A.F. 1:00 p.m. Ski Club Organization during Registration Volleyball Mon. 24 Sept Wed. 19 Sept Mon.· & Tue. AC. 8:00p.m. Curling Thu. 18 Oct Mon. 15 Oct Thu. Granite Club 10:ocr p.m. CO·ED INSTRUCTION

Water Fitness Wed. 26 Sept Thu. 20 Sept Wed. Pool7:30 p.m. Scuba Mon. 24 Sept Thu. 20 Sept Mon. Pool7:30 p.m. I Stroke Improvement Wed. 26 Sept Thu. 20 Sept Wed. Poo17:30 p.m. l Learn to Swim Mon. 24 Sept Thu. 20 Sept Mon. Pool 7:30p.m. UP TO 50°/o OFF • Beginner Squash Mon. 24 Sept Fri. 21 Sept AC. 7:00 p.m. Lecture Room - Organizational AND MORE Kung Fu T.BA. Fri. 21 Sept Meeting Yoga T.BA. Fri. 21 Sept Dance Exercise T.BA. Fri. 21 Sept AC. 7:00p.m. Lecture ON SUMMER FASHIONS Ball Room Dance Mon. 24 Sept Fri. 21 Sept Room - Organizational Meeting page 24 CORD WEEKLY Friday, _September 7, 1984

For Business-& Economics Students ONLY Economics Special Intro Economics Lipsey, Economics, 4th edition, used. $10 off new list price· L------~ -~---- uw -a. - The $ 15 refundable if >< for the new Arts refundable after all, but students, University Ave. W. WLU October. It looks like students than expected se\\ used boo~s.{ot requesting it, even after \tlltllediate cted\t on favour of It during last purcnase of u•"' or (right next to Chances R) referendum. used boo~s ot stat\onet~ University Textbook Store Student 150 University Ave. W. WATERLOO

Diet Dinners The Dining Hall is som thing new this year. weekend meals are avauaniA students have the choice or heavy meal plans.

Transit Talk A student bus pass is available this year, Student Union is still trying us a better deal.

Chipping in ,...... "\ Recent additions to \ Computing Centre have \ our facilities more in \ today's ever changing world.

Th!nkinq of going to this year? A series ot available at the rP'<111Vi'11. closes on October 27. Shakespeare and T Williams are among the staged until Stratford their year.

Guelph grabs Th Golden Hawks 1& 10 loss at the hands Gu lph Gryphons Shmerama Bows last