1-27 XXXIV 3 9 12 16 at 20 issues volume last pg. pg. drafted .pg. life pg. and McKay and .....pg. of stolen, crumbles.

~ is J 5 Hawks Scott today Senate 6. s m ? student highlight by bike world -' 4 — X for Governors page s I a g Jr football your 03 C 13 forums of on □ photo: whole ■P =5 C/) Inside... « CFL...... theCord O 3 Open Tuesday. Platforms Board Three Evaluating evaluations entertainment Bravado Laurier. When your Story news extra sports to feature cover

The day they stole our bikes... j '.S"> a k ?H® I I ■ V B 1 b 112 1;. 4 f.;.iS: *

■' ■ ■ 1■• ' mHn|. |l m ESI '\' ft •. ■ ■'H- '»*•& m Kfl i^awirirfffWllW

S ■ WL. ■

- ' El - M i£+ % • » H - [ 11 .i Issl p| 1 V# ]

* IX I I • \ m m&' 112 iwi Hut *1L ■ ■ *»j(v Mfc JB

» E ■ m- JH mI ft* . tEJ, JsV ■ b • \ H \ I q^H

5388jKj22 HBBB £SSOhM| Bfl

•' w n Bfeß V>. '^lliiliiiMßgS vttwfS®* tt yotSo , .Jc

''

~ 'i^^iMß iii' -— --•

~ ■■ " w*f- BIS pp ' ®!/

**'

111 l 1 if M J j Jj|^^*(ai^^^Mlw^PTMßi^BM^PrT^Hi|^ir»iijppßl

W A g^^^^BKrH[^^L~^lgUo£Mv^BK jblj^tQu^s.^J NEWS

Waterbuffalos' donation

JELENA MIHAJLOVIC

Cord News

the $2 200 was donated by

Waterbuffalos club last Friday to

four charities.

On Friday, March 18 Scott

Walker and Matt Gillis, this year's president and vice-presi- dent of the Waterbuffalos club,

along with Laurier's Dean

Nichols, presented the donations

to various organizations in the community.

In total, $2 200 was donated

to the following organizations:

$1 000 to the Canadian Liver

Foundation; $500 to Laurier Stu-

dents for Literacy; $500 to

ACCKWA (AIDS Committee of

Cambridge, Kitchener, Waterloo

and Area); and $200 to the Sun-

shine Foundation.

When asked how the funds

were raised, President of the

Waterbuffalos Scott Walker said

had successful they a really year,

which he attributed to a "dedi-

of executives cated group and

social committee people."

An upcoming Waterbuffalo

event is their Pre-Exam Blow-

Out which will be held Wednes- Sheldon Waterbuffalos helping out local community. Pic: J. Page day, March 30 at the Twist. Open forum a big fizzle

KATHLEEN HONEY Nick Hrebicek suggested the issues of the quality of education meeting this year, as well as meet- his disappointment at the repre-

the Students' the The Cord News need for anonymous exams, as- and student input into deci- ings of the Union, sentatives for the Greenplan.

also Senate, and otherLaurier moderator for forum said Last Tuesday the open forum for signing students with numbers sion making process. He groups. the open

Senate Board of Governors and the the student noted the Kmet said he had not attended all had been con- (not same as num- upcoming capital cam- representatives

in be BOG this tacted. referendum elections was held bers) allowing students to paign. any meetings year, not- students After the Concourse. Sadly though, marked clearly on their merit. Jeremy Kmet said he wanted ing most are not aware the open forum,

— and the very few students showed up Pruyn Haskins, running for to make the BOG more account- of the time location of Catherine Phillips, representative

the able. He noted the dollars "I don't consider ex- for the said she had including some of people de- re-election, plans on getting stu- being meetings. greenplan not

for the voiced all student services for the been notified fending sides referendum dent concerns on com- spent to move to perience a prerequisite by anyone directly said said about the forum. She said it questions. mittees, where much of the deci- Regina and King Streets, and position," Kmet, noting per- open

main issues of sion is done. would be better her that The concern making actually the dollars spent sonality and interest as important was mentioned to an open

the the forum and that to the Senate Candidates were All candidates made it clear making library more useful, for position. was being held,

Athletic The last of the fo- she could show if she professorevaluations, increasing they were intent on making stu- and updating the Com- part open up wanted,

tuition the dent at the most but not time. fees, move of many issues felt senate, either plex. rum was perhaps poorly was given a

the main commit- A member of the audience student services off cam- through taking part on attended. Only two representa- HEALTH PLAN 202 and with the asked how the for pus to Regina 232 King tees, or by working mem- candidates would tives referendum questions Indicate which of the health bers of due the showed Charlie following Street, and the Senate's account- to create change. keep on top issues to up: Angelakos plan scenarios you prefer: ability to the students of Laurier. Because of the lack of at- infrequency of meetings (about supporting OUSA, and Peter • A mandatory Health Plan for the entire Paul McQueen showed con- tendance, few questions were five a year). Hearty supporting a mandatory student body. The renewal cost will be cern for the communication be- asked of the candidates. Perhaps Doak said he would spend health plan. $63.95 for an individual student or the Senate and other the the time between stressed the mini- for student and their tween or- most interesting question meetings creat- Angelakos $141.57 a family.

ganizations on campus such as asked at the open forum, posed ing proposals and creating solu- mal cost of joining OUSA, stat-

• An Health Plan. The Union. theother tions be it would increase optional (opt-out) the Students' Jeff King by Hrebicek, was asking to implemented. ing not cause an renewal for cost this plan will be $78.41 he wanted that if could be Kmet said of said to prevent grow- candidates they a most the work in Union fees, and the money for and individual student or $ 170.04 for sizes and for BOG done affect ing class decreasing bathroom fixture, what they was between meet- would not the bottom line. a student and their family.

would be. Hrebicek revealed he He said of said that course availability. ings. "[the Board Gov- Hearty choosing an OUSA Mike Rosenblatt's key inter- would choose to be a mirror, stat- ernors] don't understand what we opt out health plan would change Do favour of the WLU member of he had stolen the see and what the membership est as a potential sen- ing response we want [as stu- way student services are you Students' Union the Ontario Under- is the of Sean None the ate availability comput- from Taylor. of dentsj". viewed at Laurier. He painted a graduate Student Alliance? Aid member-

ers at Laurier, other candidates The candidates asked especially Banyan responded. were picture of students wanting to ship fee to be paid by the WLU Students'

Paul The next section the whether had attended have Union. computers. Young's peeve of open they any out opt out fees for the Ath- GREEN PLAN was the issue of student forum candidates for the BOG After letic repre- gave meetings. members Complex and the campus Do and environmental fee WLU sentation on the Senate. He noted Board of Governors chance the at a to of audience stopped com- bars. you that for proactive initiatives, fee to be that there are 64 on the address the handful of about the It not where the places people menting whether ques- was known $0.50/student per term? Senate, the of which around the Concourse. tion was Doak other majority milling planted or not, representatives were. A taken staff and Steve Doak main • Yes • No up by faculty. noted the said he had attended most of the member of the audience stated 4 NEWS THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 BOD End of year for SP

Committee The Committe tution were ratified yet again. The report. business was set to develop a Bored Watch changes were mainly trivial, and up future typically involved changing the plan and give direction for theirendeavours. Student number 2/3 into "two thirds". PUBs Boards in the An important change, how- Due to lack of information,

involved the Committee not able to come Publications ever, clarification was with financial statements of the proxy voting procedure up any AMAL MOUSSAOUI which had caused problems in for future projections. However, Committee did work with Cord News Commentary the past. Proxies according to the the various of the Cor- As the 1993/1994 WLUSP BOD constitution can not be used for departments

to set and establish wind up their term they are tying quarum. poration up

loose ends. Director mission statements that will help up some Namely, new Chris Bradley pre- work amendments to the Cord Consti- sented the Business Planning the departments towards an

ideal.

The mission statements, as Hiring for Director Sue Bradey pointed out, process which are supposed to give one a

"warm and fuzzy feeling," were Dons questioned mostly statements that involved working towards making the Stu-

dent Publications Corporation a

MARK HEASLEY hadn't even made alternate I self-sufficient profitable organi-

Cord News couldn't believe it, he would be zation, producing a high quality

don." Morrison later How are those wise, wise, folk the perfect paper to satisfy student's needs.

said. later on be in- known as 'dons' chosen? Are Kmet was placed The feelings that were to

the the best they chosen at birth because they alternate list. voked by statements were have the 'don' gene? Do they To improve the hiring reflected by the advertising de- proc- Do they look like they've had enough? Pic: Virginia Parker have to tasksand ess outlined some mission statement complete quests , Wdowczyk partment's

them adventure and of the that are included ask for such will be able ad- that take on changes being which promising to lications can not a to provide more

mortal made: a for all random of kind- This however, recommendations for danger beyond compre- paper screening make "one act levy. Agreement, equate the

be followed a hension? applicants, to by ness a day." will expire and will be up for Board. No. panel interview, and then the Another notable proposal of discussion in 1996. Under other business, there

do howeverhave Head Resident interview. The the Business Committe Business Plan- discussion They to pass Planning Finally, the was some regarding a series of interviews and nature of the situational is for in 1996 ask- existence Cord screen- prob- a referendum ning Committee was the movement of offices to

And lems that be the ings . it is this system that the applicants are to ing for a levy from student ratified by the Board, and Chair 202 Regina, once construction

Luke Morrison has asked will be revealed before- would be a problem population. This levy Phil Kinzingerrecommended that on the new Student Union Build-

with. hand - all in the to stream- similar the fees that the Stu- attempt to in the future the Committee mem- ing begins. Technicalities of the

"You in- line the and better the dents' Union on WLU bers in the will be dealt with the may question my process imposes should meet summer move by

since I was turned down chances of the best students. Under the current sufficient time for tegrity hiring person Op- to give prepa- new 1994/1995 Board of Direc- for to be a don," said Morrison, "but the job. Student Pub- This the erating Agreement, rations. way Committee tors which is set to meet soon. 1 feel that dons should be chosen

based on their qualifications, not

if the Head Resident is their bud-

dy. That seems to be how it is

now."

Fran Wdowczyk is WLU's

Student Life Co-ordinator. Con- cerned with the quality of life of

students Laurier on campus,

Wdowczyk's duties include be-

consulted the choice ing on of

dons.

"What we're in looking for a is Fast Niagara College offering Track programs that start don she began, "is someone in Here's a to to with common sense, is well y May. fantastic opportunity put your degree work and increase versed in the university and resi- dramatically your employability. dence systems, is a team player, is caring, compassionate, and capable of supervising fellow stu- ■fev Welland dents.". Campus

Interior is than Currently, the initial appli- SBl Design more you think it is. It's not confined to private residential and cants are filtered through a ten llprj- jHHI renovation restoration, but also takes in commercial/ minute interview to select who •' industrial projects such as health care facilities, schools and office should recieve a second inter- •• introduction and ' ; buildings. Study to interior design, textiles view. It is from this second inter- interior 8 finishes, drafting and business. The term runs for view that list is The ; a compiled. weeks 2 and then in three- ?w starting May September you join our final choice of who is to be a don *5t Interior year Design program. Applicants must have a Fine Arts however, lies with the Head Res- Start future ,J| degree. designing your own at Niagara College. Dons ident. re-applying are just granted an interview since it is likely that they are already qual- ified. Niagara Falls The final meeting with the ifei Campus

Head Resident is one issue creat- 'This is no run-of-the-mill program. It's a dynamic, multi- dimensional of concern. No written notes into the trade and ing exploration commerce between Canada, the U.S.,

are available, Mexico the these interviews and European market, highlighted by hands-on interac- ti° and in Luke Morrison's words : n with Canadian and American trade practitioners.There are op- call" the '"it's just a on portunities for work judgement . experience this ■i • ■■ • placements through one-year, ____, ■__» in *■• IS OUT I CIST real issue tnis Head Resident's part. ycor. International Trade will for post-diploma program. train you careers

Another area of concern is such as international marketing and sales, import/export manage- that of the percieved inconsisten- ment cu^ finance administration ' relations, among others. Wdtch fof our Special that students see in the cy some

itself. The case of hiring process Retrospect Al- niag ara Jeremy Kmet was raised. College alternate issue next though he made the list week, For call l 1 information our Admissions office he did not this of dons last year, a leek back at the last 36 of years (905) 735-2211 ext. 7618

- despite the qualifications year The Cord. that he had gathered in the last

"When I heard that he H year. NEWS THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 5 More university cutbacks

JANINE WHITE that benefit pay for most of the Cord News program with some help from the

cutbacks AQ are causing severe rest.

financial problems for several OCUA advised the Minister

universities, and Wilfrid Laurier to use the compromise formula,

is no exception. but unfortunately for Laurier and

AQ stands for Acquired others, the Minister has chosen

Qualifications, a program to take the second choice - that

which school all for through public Universities pay the pro-

teachers take can university gram. The plan will be imple-

courses to further their education mentedMay Ist if nothing isdone

in a particular subject area. about it.

Universities thathave teacher This means that the $58 mil-

training programs, such as York, lion must be taken out of the

Queens, U of T, Brock, and university system through cuts

take in the Nippising, part this pro- over next four years. While

The has gram. AQ program al- no university can easily handle

been funded the be ways fully by cuts right now, some will more

government, and this is where adversely affected than others. difficulties the have now arisen. Nipissing receives about a

The province has decided to third of its funding from AQ, and

eliminate AQ funding over the can gain from the tuition fees

four from these next years to save $58 mil- courses. Schools like

lion annually. Three proposals WLU who don't take part in the

how deal on to with the situation program will have to take the After the business office be for than before. File coming here, may coming to you more pic. were sent for discussion to the cuts with no benefits to balance

Ontario Council of the loss. University and pay full cost," she said. "Even Minister March 4th. The Deputy matically. An additional cut of

Affairs: that the universi- The will in would be better Minister their 4% is rumoured 1) only changes result an breaking even was sympathetic to for next year.

ties that benefit from the over $1 million in than this." pro- cut govern- concerns and the plan is being Dr Marsden and the others

for the that all ment for Laurier. gram pay costs; 2) funding Presi- Marsden, along with repre- reconsidered. hope an agreement will be

contribute Lorna Marsden is which will universities to fund- dent very con- sentatives from Waterloo, With all the cuts that have reached decrease the

or that a is cerned about the cuts. and had been made in cutbacks and lessen the fi- ing; 3) compromise McMaster, Guelph, an recent years, AQ reached in which the universities "We gain none of the benefit appointment with the Deputy Laurier's budget is shrinking dra- nancial strain.

It's the end ofthe year, and hope's running out

I don't believe it. would the that least a few the best education for food PROS & CONS Why assuming at peo- get possible, scrounging desperately

administration choose to build ple have been listening to what but it seems like an increasing and warmth and safety. Were they

Steve Doak when can't others now we afford more are saying. Sooner or later number of students just want to really human? Some were ready

because Cord NewsCommentary students, we're not get- reality should overcome aca- pay lessfortheirdegree. Attempts for death. Some believed in

* education believed in Hell. As this WLU forthe cur- demic idealism - unless the to make of a year swings shut, ting adequate funding leg- quality Heaven; some

be A student and that have been Some with seems to growing smoothly. rent population endary philanthropist was major issue largely never came up an

there's for foretold in olden does because I'll bet that lot has happened this year, and no hope any more days ap- impotent, mostly people original thought. some

next To in the future? to institution. can't decide how to it of them had the to value hopes are high for year. money pear save our measure audacity On the other the fund- of academic their existence few hear some people from the ad- hand, For the government end without challenging beyond a should be than ministration and the Students' ing crisis coming to an things, OUSA is still reaching freedom. Most students have been starving moments more your

end and for its The of left of this and education. Union talk, you'd think we were soon. Enough proposals potential. Ministry out debate, many

a rose been laid down Education and has been that will be taken But balance - living in garden. suggestions . e Training assume things you things your that the and the ad- them of without involvement. A rumour has been spreading government showing some respect. Now care their happiness against someone

is ministration should be able to find what will need to survive is So ask the for the amount that a building going up on the they they government else's, you give

of but solutions to concrete to to the amount demand. south east corner campus, some our problem, proposals present more money. against you

the and to individual The can't make government Meanwhile, poor people are government

universities. CFS-0 also the for when die. This is out trying asking government you happy you

the world while So the institution can't either. if to save whining more money. are unem- Maybe

that shouldn't have So the sick. So the they to pay to ployed. are are you concentrate on scrounging -

(J benefit from one of the best edu- pensioners. So are Canadian art- for food, shelter, and fashionable GIFTS OOA 1Gi C OtW'JO U GREETING CARDS 112O V cation systems in the world. This ists. So are the bureaucrats of the clothing, death will seem quicker.

leaves it all up to OUSA to chan- civil service. So is the military. Two hundred thousand peo-

nel student and the born all perspectives sug- Politics does not serve ple were today. They'll

individual. gestions concerning reality up to die soon enough. F 'ow HOS the Two hundred thousand So and £xSrroraF government. peo- enjoy your vacation, § '^E^Bri students Some Grab Most just want a ple died today. were old, your youth. some tunes, an H with Cards our Recycled tVg Deliver [I deal. I have cold good always thought some were young. Some never even tan, some beer, and a

should life that we, as students, try to realised there's more to than good fuck.

{daM- PRE-TURRET || Mt CHOKER CHICKEN | . „ Q mnA/^r T vUIiUAT INlwill This entitles the bearer to a basket I } coupon | of order of ik i112 our largest, juiciest wings BURGER SPECIAL for only $4 (plus taxes). 61 00 1/O I D 1 1 Good only 5-9pm Thursday. y1.77 1/4 LB. v 7/94 !tff %£„ti, I BURGER & FRIES _*dfinkpurchase necessary | *drinkpurchase necessary ______THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 6 NEWS

Bring me back my bike

outside be in happened right my door, find the they are going to punched McKAY The I will probably SCOTT designed for the purpose. three feet to be exact. And I the throat several times. was I but the likelihood of Cord News Commentary lock was gone. The way figure number, # Bitterman! not Damn Me! Buthow Bitter? Call me prepared. the bike is about as Bike. Owner. Victim. that the lock was removed was by finding good could I be more around with a bad atti- prepared? returned the crimi- Walking It dark and cold the interior of the lock as it by was a night. spraying having that Steal next bike and find tude in hand.The thing my with This will nals themselves. Few people will my Thieves were in the neighbour- a freezing agent. fact that it out! know disturbs me most is the brittle and return to a if they hood. Little did I know that I was render the metal very place

...I it will shatter with from a their next prey. Ready I was, a blow thought! Armed with defences hammer. Remember! Locks only in the Concourse that only the six million dollar keep honest people honest! Psychics in face! man could fracture. Big Gobbs of Egg my

laboured in and When I noticed the bikes I I my room gone

also unfamiliar bikes heard noise. Noise that was only noticed two

familiar I our The bikes were too to my ears. thought on property. the it was the loud neighbours. Mis- relative garbage compared to

it to take 1. Time ticked away and prizes awarded Biggest

time realize vul- Asshole of the on March was my to my Day flat and 21st. After further nerability. 1 left my investigation

dead in tracks. The the next I determined that stopped my day

railing outside the door seemed these bikes were also stolen. The

them our empty. Too empty. My heart thieves rode to place

ME" — and left them behind after raced to a stop. "FUCK I hitting

1 load. Damn was hit! And hit hard. called my the Mother lazy

1 called the and roommate— another victim. We criminals! cops

of kind- swore like unruly bailiffs. It did was met by a barrage But, not help. The only thing that came ness. They wanted to help.

- I to our minds was revenge. no serial number no report.

Ahhh...Sweet Revenge! still search for the elusive

far Too far Number Number Where Revenge is away. number.

Can You the to reach. I have a few ideas in my Be? If Cops happen

to find the bike and I do mind but I am challenged by the not pro- serial number bike skill of the thieves. My buddy's duce a my

bike was locked with a combina- will meet a horrible end. Sold off

auctioneer tion lock and cable. The cable by a drooling with half

had been snipped with bolt cut- of the Kentucky tobacco stock in

ters. Two other bikes, worth about his cheek. Whacked with a cane

and off with miserable a looney a piece, were near by sent some

have and unlocked. My bike was rotten child only to a play- what's future? Students came out in droves to the concouse this to ask Hey my past Monday so locked with a state of the art ing card jammed in the spokes up and card These and their fortunes of palm readers. psychics were presented by Myrth, Mystery GUARD lock and heavy cable it sounds like a lawnmower. Magic and the BSA. Pic: Virginia Parker

THE LOYAL ORDER OF| w a t e r b u/Sf l °P E s JOURNALISM s , g m A C H , a e

PRESENT

ra ft PP W A 11 Writing, editing, photography, interviewing,

I '» '*» II li W% W% production skills, public relations

iliif OUT andmoe

- Advanced r standing possible for university

graduates!

classes start in may

< nU ( Conestoga W*T College^

WEDNESDAY MARCH 30 I 1

VERY SPECIAL GUESTS For Further details on the Journalism Program, or

LOWEST OF THE LOW other quality College progarams, call:

ON STAGE AT 9:30

A L L I I THE COLLEGE INFORMATION CENTRE TfcKCEETS AV I A b L E'' a T

CENTRE SPOT;CONCOURSE 748-3516 THE TWIST; U OF W ADVANCE $6 DOOR $8 L

~ ~ DOORS OPEN BPM PHOTO ID REQUIRED 7 THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 NEWS

Tuition fee hikes may be SH..IT HAPPENS announced sometime tomorrow

observed inside the Straightfrom the illustrious Pe- was MARK HEASLEY Dhramsi a concerned Dhramsi had "made it He had somehow speaks as Laughren, ter Jorg, Laurier Security Su- premises. Cord News for this student clear in no uncertain terms that found his spokesman lobby pervisor way through one of

The rumour has come down that the for the back subse- group. justifications being given Mar. 15 - 01:15 : Disturbance doors. He was

Ontario's Cabinet has already "If three strikes and won't be you're cutting support accepted A minor disturbance was set- quently evicted and charged tuition approved a ten percent out was the rule for as justified." Dhramsi stated. tled when the officers with governments, duty pre- trespassing. hike each of the NDP wouldhave further illustrated over next two the hit the show- Dhramsi - vented two friends from getting Mar. 18 13:28 : Mischief with in conjunction a 4 ers long Dhramsi said. "The this point by using the example years, ago", into a fight outside the Students' At this time an unclad male was decrease in transfer percent pay- first strike was to student of the the fed- The witnessed the ignore province blaming Union Building. two were streaking through universities. ments to aid, the second was to further cut eral budget as the source of with- further Laurier sent on their way and no quad during day tours.

The long-awaited announce- and the third strike was drawing further funding, support. action was necessary. Upon investigation, wit- ments, supposedly to take tuition in this context." place increasing "They (the government) Mar. 15 -19:30 : Theft Under ness reports revealed that the

this Friday, which is another he continued. should be more honest with stu- just $1000 nude culprit began his journey nail in the coffin of the will NDP, Severely criticising its poli- dents," Dhramsi said, The fed- A WLU the end student reported her from east of campus and meet with considerable criticism OUSA had earlier sat in on eral has increased its cies, government wallet had been stolen from her headed to the northwest corner

as already shown by Titch the government's discussion of transfer payments to universities purse. In the wallet was $ 150 as before five females tackled and

Dhramsi. tuition to voice the of 25% since the NDP took of- concerns by well as the usual identification. kept him entertained until of-

As an advisor on the Steering Ontario's students. fice, but the NDP has in- only No suspects. ficers could arrive. The culprit,

Committee of the Ontario Uni- with creased its transfer to Ontario uni- Having spoken - directly Mar. 17 02:10 : Stolen Li- Larry Latourneau, is still in cus- versity Students' Alliance, NDP Finance Minister Floyd versities by 17%, Laughren is cence Plate tody. Clothes have been lent to

pocketing that remaining one- A WLU student him. reported that (Congratulations Larry on

quarter." the rear licence plate of his ve- winning this honourary- and un-

At Laurier itself, are things hicle had been stolen. No sus- fortunately fictional- crime from

not so dim according to WLU pects. the Entertainment Reader's Poll Students' Union and Ontario Mar. 17 - 14:10 : Theft Under draw.) Students' Alli- Undergraduate Mar. 19 - 08:30 $1000 : Missing Per- ance representative Charlie A WLU professor reported that son "I don't think Angelakos. we're had been The WLU his suit jacket taken sister of a student of (OUSA) being ignored... part from the classroom that he had reported that her sister could

our strength and credibility is that be and she been teaching in. He hadstepped not found was con-

we can stand an criticise the up out for a few moments at class cerned about her because of her he said. government" change and when he returned emotional state recently. The

"At Laurier, ancillary fees the later located jacket was gone. young lady was won't be like increasing next - She year Mar. 17 19:15 : LLA Viola- behaving very irrationally.

they are at other schools, and I tion was taken to K/W Hospital think that on Friday we'll see A WLU where she in the ~IHL student was found un- was given to regulations on ancillary fees and medical j^fjj^:~ - conscious in the 24 hour TV care of staff. a move more fair student fund- to - of the Students' Union Mar. 20 17:50 : Trespass X:: ■■: lounge . ; ; ' : -:\'w ■••:■' : x " ■'. ' ■'.': '' V W'V* 7^"' like the Income ing Contingent Building. Dueto his intoxicated Three non-university males

the Repayment Program condition he was taken to the K/ were evicted from AC for Angelakos finished. W Detox Centre. It appears that not having memberships. They

To the students of Ontario, all issued written he had been celebrating St. were trespass

Titch Dhramsi had to that say Patrick's Day somewhat early. notices. could look forward hav- to - they Mar. 17 21:10 : Trespass

ing "a that both access guarantee A part-time WLU student had All WLU students caught in and of education will be quality been refused access to the Tur- criminal activities must face

affected by the cumu- Fred and the negatively ret becauseof insufficient iden- Nichols forces of lative hits they've been taking." tification. A short time later he the Dean's Advisory Council.

■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■

11 SUPER OPTICAL] j

■ mz\WA f'.f.'H TtSZ 11Bifl I llTOWtm

■ m--^

kcil/il;fil 111=MM J[til sls» ■ IVH |[ |«|cETlilM ■

Buy any complete pair of glasses or contact lenses at regular price and

get a second pair FREE Ask about our mix and match combination M ITf' MiMi(BnwWriri^oW^^Jiiiw^HTlftffifW' |" 'n' iTf*?*" ■ glasses and contact lenses. Complete details in store. ■ examinations ■ Eye arranged. Expires May 28,1994 ■

■ ■

■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■ March 8 NEWS THE CORD Thursday, 24, 1994

More for your money

Similar screening process." with and intimate personals. JOHN HUCULIAK she has contracted gonorrhea he utters arrogance. When asked didn't ads be found in the Personals why they Male female exotic danc- can Cord twice and been assaulted once by and News in in Classifieds of most set up a brothel Nevada, where known section the a violent client. Now she as "strip- Wander about the streets of Kitch- pays ers, commonly is in After calling one prostitution legalized some natural for newspapers. and her cashman half of her earnings pers", are a target ener you might find more and where in I counties, they lived being a major newspaper, for and her cus- man yaccusations of gig- personal than a dime on the sidewalk. protection says before to offered "choice of wom- moving Waterloo, olos and strumpets. In was my Prostitution is indus- a growing 'Nick' responded by it custom matched to satisfy" explaining the K/W area, en, try in the Oktoberfest region, even I that "There was too much $ 150, but if I two, get ten com- seems that these for get if it is not too well known. in Nevada off! petition to gain a accusations are dollars "I've been on the for spot in when con- sizable profit. Here Waterloo, unfounded for Another personal, eight now," said one street- years there was almost a need more refined, for a the most tacted, was slightly "Business part. walker. picked up brothel or pleasure From investi- giving no prices or suggestions high-class awhile back, and so has the com- The establishment. We are not far gating the five anything illegal. two-person petition." of this from the Toronto market and this "nightclubs"in team in charge operation The is not as sim- profession Oktoberfest of I to allow is the capital North the area, was generous enough ple as just standing on a street interview with them. America.. . .Anyone in business found only two me an and if corner asking someone they the and 'Nick' own a would probably supply mar- cases of the 'Shannon' with for will sleep you money. in ket with something that it wants, strippers sell- pleasure establishment up- There is a considerable amount whose clientele and we ['Shannon' and 'Nick'] ing themselves town Waterloo, of training involved with it. Most in the middle-class are doing it." forafterclosing are mainly of it can be learned as you work, income brackets. All of the people interviewed time, at a very to upper-class but that takes time and time is saver suggested that the legalization of popular club "Sorry, no student plan business. tom- money in any During 'Shannon' the would close by this available here," prostitution industry be ers have very that time, a prostitute could "Our business is not a benefit the K/W area. Some citi- increased University. laughs. cheated, arrested, injured, even the abhor the the low-class affair," she states. "We zens on street, idea, and "all have Whether man- killed if they haven't learned the most ourselves on quality but of the citizens that were been knows about pride high "game". Their job varies depend- gentlemen. ager indifferent about services clientele at a asked were the have these occurrences is to our price 'Ray' may ing on the services they provide remember that there be recorded. that shows it. Our employees are matter. Just some yet to to theircustomers. Prostitutes can frightened away free is in Kitchener/ I' For the most well and benefit from prostitution buyers but m safe to part, paid be broken down into the areas of the to Waterloo, that it is still illegal, find others." the strip clubs in K/ monthly medicals, option streetwalkers, escorts, and site and the and that if look, shall NOT the room at the brothel, you you 'Tom', on the oth- W are place pro- workers. This articles covers all

our receive. a tection given from client er hand, doesn't need to pick up night three areas.

a cash man for protec- companion. Streetwalkers are what one

He But in so- tion. is a type of today's usually associates as typical pros- known where discre- who streetwalker ciety, titutes. They are prostitutes surviv- as a who's tion is a key to attract their customers at drink- bar-fly, of local in this the establishments and, working out a ing industry, ing you to find sex for bar, and getting paid way your guessed it, on the streets. They trick. is in Pick usually $50 per money print. have no real base to work out of, Monday March 28 Assault MATCH 1 Waterloo Sexual Sup- "Sometimes," 'Tom' up any or though some streetwalkers admit -5:30 Elections for next Centre p.m. or t presents Planning can be TAB magazine, and one p to special rates at cer- laughs,"l receiving International and year's Amnesty forSaferCommunities:awork- talked down.. . Hey, will find a few ads tain local hotels in the area. club executive will be held in For for for professionals. more I love women and personals at least, shop Streetwalkers are the kind the Niobe Direct Lounge. any information, contact Susan or have another J readers to try. The who have the greatest chance of ™ David @ 886- questions to Ray Caroline at 57 I -012 1. job that magazines themselves being arrested, assaulted, killed buys 8360. Sunday April 24 clothes." act as the go-between or infected with STD's, but this my Thursday April 7 his 1 : oo The 16th annual Great is He says for call girls (being p.m. not often the case. 'Kathy,' a International 7:30p.m. Amnesty Beat will is who have Ride/Walk to Cancer streetwalker, has worked the Vic- set-up simple: women come up prostitutes a place, is holding their general meeting Waterloo Town talk in out- start at Square, toria Park and buy him drinks, they though mainly specializing area for a few years the Waterloo Public at Library. forms can be picked about he tells them his calls) and their clients, publish- pledge up now. She makes anywhere from things, Eric Gabriel will be speaking on banks, bike if he leaves these ads and at area Canada Trust 20 price, they accept ing personals among $40 to $ 1 per trick, depending what individuals can do to sup- and fitness are-as. For with them. "I rarely am refused," other legitimate escort ads shops, on the requirements performed; many aboriginal rights. port more information call the Ca-

13 Wednesday April nadian Cancer Society at 886-

and 7:00 Atari user Control, monitor, adapt p.m. group 8888. KWEST holds its general meet- Saturday May 28 ANDREW "IRV" HOPPER Professor Gord service." McDougall, SkyDome's ing in MC2009, 2nd floor of the The Golden 10:00 to 5:00 p.m. Cord News organizer of the case, felt the case stated that the McDougall Math & Computer Building. Triangle Cat Fanciers will be Last Week, SkyDome officials' was one of the most successful case was selected by a colleague Phone 725-2068 for details, holding aCat Show at the Gran- Toronto Laurier students cases ever presented as the Inte- in and modified to meet Visitors welcome. problems gave jte club in Kitchener. Phone Case Exercise. a chance to strut their stuff. grated the SBE regulations. 14 Thursday April Carolyn Bennett at 740-6217 students lived stated "Students officals Some on pizza McDougall "SkyDome were 6:00 to 9:30 The Kitchener- p.m. for more information. the the for a week. Others got an average were presented with problem quite pleased with quality of

five hours in for the to the bottom line of the solutions on of sleep ... improve presented Friday

balance sheet with- the week. Hours were spent at SkyDome's by six finalists", McDougall SUMMER JOBS 1994 the said. Kinko's, in meetings, and on out harming the quality of

computer. Student Networking is a FREE service for The Integrated Case Exercise employers. Employers are able to hundred third (ICE) put about two TORONTO electronically search through the SN business students through year database to find the ideal for the (TMiT) MONTESSORI student(s) one of the most stressful times of job(s) employers have available. If your their lives. INSTITUTE resume is in our database, an employer may On Monday at 6:30 a.m., stu- be it this Don' t examining very moment. Established in 1971 dents went on a stripped-down delay, send your resume today. version of the Waterbuffalo Se- Toronto Montessori Institute is now accepting applications

for the 1994-1995 FOR MORE 5077 cret Tour and hopped on a bus- Teacher-Training Course. INFORMATION, CALi (519) 885

destination unknown. The only This course leads to a Diploma to teach 3 to 6 and 6 to difference about this tour is that 12 olds, Montessori year applying educational theory and until the partying was not done methodology. the end of the week.

the The main problem stu- Prerequisite: Undergraduate Degree.

dents faced with was how to were Course duration: August 2, 1994 - June 30, 1995. the create more attractions for Enrolment is limited. For further mi° information, SkyDome for the following year. jft m please call Pam Debbo, Registrar, at (905) 889-6882. This event gained the atten-

of K-W Record and CKCO- tion Course is accredited by the Montessori Accreditation | 886-1200 I TV News. The reason for this Council for Teacher Education (MACTE). summed in fascination was up % - 5 anywhere anytime for people or parcels TORONTO MONTESSORI INSTITUTE 8569 Bayview Avenue. word, one "SkyDome!" ni n Richmond Hill, Ontario L4B 3M7 9 THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 NEWS WLU Senate elections

Professor evaluations Senate and Board of ability must be a top priority.

become a more useful tool Governors platforms Education should not be com- must

More student in the future so that students for your voting enjoy- promised. repre-

know what are for ment. WLUSU referen- sentation is needed to provide a they paying for student voice. I will before signing up courses dum platforms were stronger a fight for innovative ways to pro- (and dropping couple grand). not submitted. vide students with the high This is not about supporting an

that this is about im- quality of services they pay Anti-Calendar,

the current "does for. We must make sure that the proving on

of attend classes pattern decreasing courses your professor

offered and increasing regularly?". The purpose of is enrollment does not continue. Laurier's administration to

the students to im- Greater access tocomputers and serve so as

be PAULYEUNG the of education. new technology must prior- prove quality This be students on the lead- point must never ity to keep I am a second yearBusiness stu- forgot- Paul McQueen students are the ing edge. Ancillary fees must dent who is specifically con- ten. Simply put, I'm Paul McQueen and I'm run- that the administration be kept to a minimum so cerned with the fact that the stu- reason why

ning to be one of your repre- is students can afford to continue dents of Laurier have experi- here. sentatives on the Senate. My This I have their education. Remember to enced an increase in fees in re- past year, consists of three platform pri- the work in the vote for King! gards to the adding and drop- gained experience ideas. D. mary Union and have de- SAMUEL ping of courses. Students are Students' Vital Student Services 1) fees for less communication GILLMORE paying more serv- veloped my Health Career (e.g.- Services, skills. As a student with these I am an older student with ex- ices. This is a trend that is un- Services) should not be moved in both full and be I feel I can effectively perience time em- acceptable must concerns, from their present location. voice the needs and of ployment and college. I will stopped! rights Recognizing that Regina is the harness both and The Senate, which deals Laurier students with the ad- my experience future centreof our campus, this the student with academic is a vehi- ministration. energy to serve body issues, move is ill-timed and doesn't student cle which should be used Please approach me as a representative upon more coincide with the wishes of the the WLU Senate. As member voice student with concerns in to a effectively to con- any regards students. first such the Senate and make voice of the WLU Senate my cerns over important issues your Present teacher evalu- will 2) such these fee increases heard the elections. duty be to voice any con- as as during ations, not by the supplemented well Thank you. cerns the student body and if as professor evaluations. professors themselves, are a elected, 1 will see that the fol- waste. Our adminis- addressed: complete lowing issues are be to tration must made recog- -Restructuring Professor Evalu- Board of Governors nize this. These courses are our ations -to allow objective stu- future! MICHAEL dent input on the quality of ROSENBLATT 3) With the help of Stu- teaching. is Michael candidates dent Governments 1 would like Hello, my name -Easing Effects of University Rosenblatt. For the last two to Senators have office Cutbacks decrease in see -stop any served the years, I have on serve more for our money. hours, publish some form of the puality of education offered Board of Publications. After We the newsletter, participate in Stu- cannot change by Wilfrid Laurier University time two I felt that it was world, but with a in- dent Roundtables, and be more years, strong, due to decreaded government for a change. This is why I am formed voice, we can change responsive to the needs of the support and resulting cutbacks vote to WLU. Whether it's standard students currently seeking your -limit the burden they represent. placed upon elect me to the Senate. Why duties, or I Accountability seems to special projects, students due to cutbacks and should vote for me? First have the knowledge about how have been a key point in all re- you resulting increases in tution of I have the in work, and I have the de- cent elections. As the Vice- all, experience things done. this student politics from the Board termination to get things Chair of years 8.0.D., I of Publications. Secondly, I have done my part to ensure the have the commitment and the concerns of students were be-

to do a good ing addressed. I have volun- energy necessary interests teered for Safety Audits, job representing your STEVE DOAK in the Senate. worked to ensure that the new I am the only candidate with Since 1 am in Political Students' Union Building the experience and the deter- Science with an Administration would take environmental con- mination to give you, the stu- I am familiar with both cerns into account, and am the option, dents of Laurier, the service Health Plan Co-Ordinator for the Faculty of Arts and Science

deserve on the Board of and the School of Business. you the upcoming year. Governors. in- This should assist me in I have been very repre- have For two years, I senting a wider student interest volved in campus life, from Var- worked at the Cord. I have at- rather than a narrow focus on sity Sports to Student Govern- PRUYN HASKINS tended most of the meetings of one ment. I con- merely Faculty. am dedicated, JEREMY KMET the Board of Governors and Hi! For those who don't know Some of cerned and willing to work my campaign Over the the Senate. I have met fre- next two years we name is Haskins. me, my Pruyn hard. that I issues include: I know can repre- the are to be tuition the quently with members of going facing Last year students of Laurier - the increase of tuition sent views and concerns keeping your increases of them in administration to discuss cur- approximately elected me to represent for students succinctly and responsibly to manageable 25%. Since we rent issues. I know how this are paying the Senate. Since alterna- University the Laurier Administration. and looking at other it is vital that the works - I know more, we this time I have been one of the University tives to increased tuition and students have and ef- vocal where to find information strong most senators torepresent - maintaining quality education, fective the interests. I I know the people that get representation on student's currently through increased technology Board of Governors. Finance Com- things done. sit on the Senate use students Next WLU's I think that should mittee, and senators year, represent and keeping class sizes man- have into deci- roundtable in- Long-Range Plan, expansion greater input at meetings. My ageable Build- sions how our volvement with of the Students' Union concerning ongoing - increase in the numberof com- and the will is I do not want includes the creation of ing, campus plan money spent. projects puters in the school the university to ahead Student's Commit- be issues needing strong stu- go a Advisory - improvement of the Library with its to move Student with dent representation. The new plans tee, helping the campaign facility and services offered off because VP: Academic should be Services campus to the move of examination of liberal stop proposed - a Arts

forced to realise that need they need to be acces- Student Services, and active we readily degree/program sible a focus on the to students. Increasing of exam bank for all - greater quality pursuit an recommendation of an im- fi- and The of edu- of education in the current campus safety improving programs. quality proved teacher evaluation sys- the of the and cation Laurier is main nancial climate. Dr. Berczi, the quality library at my tem VP: and the Athletic facili- focus, and if re-elected I will JEFF KING returning Finance Complex (As this is a matter which also should the ties are also important to me. continue involvement with Newsflash! The King has been Planning, open my is negotiated under a contract feel free to let stu- Please to approach Senate, and theLaurier budgeting procedure effectively repre- spotted on Campus. only an advisory role can be with that ALL of That's Jeff has dents know where their tuition me any questions sent students Wilfrid right King ar- achieved by the Senate) have and most im- is and to invite more might Laurier. VOTE PRUYN rived and he's ready to work for Vote Michael Rosenblatt for going you remember to vote. HASKINS. useful suggestions. We de- portantly, you on the Senate. Account- Senate. ONE FINAL REMINDER]

April I 4, 1 5, After "Finals" at stop /;'x

& 21 the bookstore and get

22 textbooks you'll C April -

9:00 to 3:00 never use again.

SELL YOUR BOOKS

We buy all books with current market value. ' WLU Bookstore in the Concourse

I Please Note: I I 1994 Winter Undergraduate Examination Schedule I

I 1994 - 1995 Undergraduate Timetable I

I are now available ON LINE, through the Campus Wide Information System I

I Type; wiuinfo I

I Choose: #4 Academic Information I

I Choose: #4 Undergraduate Studies I I Choose: #i for the Undergraduate Timetable I

I Choose: #2 for the Examination Schedule I sports

Ottawa takes it all in THL

ROB HUMS

Cord Sports

I Ottawa finished what might be considered a dream season on

Sunday by winning the Tamiae Hockey League championship.

12-0-1 After an undefeated regu-

lar season and losing only once,

to Quebec, in the playoffs, Ot-

tawa captured their second con-

secutive Mullin-Nesbitt Cup af-

ter a 6-3 victory over a deter-

mined Calgary squad to take the

best-of-three final series two games to none.

The return of talented centre

Kevin Sabourin to the Calgary

lineup appeared to give his team

some added jump. After some

fast and furious action in both ends, it was Ottawa, however,

who opened the scoring late in

the first period on a two-man ad-

Paul Riddolls vantage as tipped

in a point shot from Steve Hong

past a screened Greg English. In

the second period, Ottawa.opened

and scored three times things up

in a four-minute span to seem-

ingly take control of the contest.

The first of these resulted from a

blistering snapshot to the top right

corner off the stick of league lead-

ing scorer Jason Holman, fol-

lowed by Mike McMahon's goal

from the top of the crease after a

nice feed from Holman. Scott

Archer made it 4-0 for Ottawa For the second in Ottawa kicks Tamiae butt. Pic: "Rambo" Geroux year a row, some Jayson final heading into the frame, con-

with excellent offensive hat-trick and relentless defensive verting a breakaway pass from all originating off aggressive hockey, Hockey League championship

and second of are: Alan Brad Jamie Lally. forechecking and solid physical work, superb netminding, play in the game the team Avery, Tim In the first five minutes of play in front of the net. Todd thundering hits on either side as semi-finals complimented Carnegie, Rob Hums,

the third, Calgary displayed why Campbell, Rob Bobier and both teams looked for that all- Keung's shutout and enabled Ot- Snelgrove, Barry Symons, Jason

former Sabourin scored the This Emerson they are league champi- Calgary important "next goal." tawa to slip past an energetic Holman, Steve Hong,

each them the marker with into the Jamie ons. Capitalizing on power play goals, of burying eventually came Quebec team champion- Keung, Scott Archer, Lally,

from close minutes left in the final and then Brian Mike opportunities and some suspect puck range. three game, as ship repeat as McGoffin,

Ottawa defense, Calgary put three The remainder of the period Alan Avery, last season's Most Mullin-Nesbitt Cup champions. McMahon, Paul Riddolls and

offered Valuable and the Members the Matt Smith. quick goals past Emerson Keung, some exciting, end-to-end Player league's of Tamiae

all-time leading scorer, sneaked past the Calgary defense and put Athletic '94 one by English. Tim Snelgrove Banquet

capped off the scoring with an JENNIFER O'CONNELL empty net effort with ten seconds dent's Award for the most out- Cord to play. Sports standing athletic performance- all that now remains of this Stoumbos was With the likes of snipers and By female. this year Athletic the perennial all-stars Brad Tubman, year's Banquet are an OWIAA All Star, a Ist team

Greg Rickwood, Sabourin and new names engraved into shiny All Canadian, a member of the

Campbell providing the plaques and trophies and the dull CIAU Championship All Star thud of in was pounding a firepower for Calgary, it Ot- hangover Team and the WLU's team cap-

tawa's Keung who, in the end, the head's of student athletes, tain.

have been the trainers and coaches alike. may difference. Starquarterback Bill Kubas

He provided brilliant goaltending With nearly 300 attending is the male winner of the Presi-

the includ- the dinner and awards dent's throughout playoffs, presenta- Award. The fourth year

remarkable tion, the Athletic ing a eight consecu- Banquet brings MVPthis year became Laurier's

tive shutout five of which the athletic to formal close periods, year a all time leading passer, member in fashion..The came in the finals. When Calgary a spectacular of the Ist team Conference All

solved him in a multi-media tech finally the third banquet, high Star and 2nd team All Cana-

in includes the period Game 2, he rose to the event, presentation dian.

of awards to rookies of the occasion and came up with some year Because of the timing of and valuable scintillating saves to prevent them most players on the banquet and the publication

from the each of the varsity teams. deadline of full potting equalizer. Keung this paper, a

finished the with For the second in a row and playoffs a spar- year story some scary candid and for the third time in four kling 1.75 goals against average. photos of this year's Athletic fifth Not to be is the leader- years, year soccer captain will in the forgotten Banquet appear sum-

wins another Helen Stoumbos won the Presi- Ottawa yet faceoff. Pic: Jayson "Rambo" Geroux ship provided by Alan Avery. His mer issue of the Cord in May. THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 12 SPORTS

Graduating to the pros

of- the workhorse of the Western PETE ROBINSON For Ptaszek, he will be joining a team being selected late in the Cord fill in Cana- fence, was relatively Sports that definitely has a need to behind the Hamilton, not only The football has since That was shown by by season long past, dian receivers. process but also behind another one of and fact that the Lions used their first three Brenner, the new one is quite a ways away but Mike Mallot In the OUAA's fullbacks, the Golden Hawks football to select Canadian slot backs. top program re- picks Waterloo. It was not really a surprise shot in the when addition Ptaszek, B.C. Trevor of ceived a arm recently to picked up the situ- slot back of Weber State, with though for Brenner, summing up three players were drafted in the CFL Shaw a out "certain teams look for a and their first (sixth overall), and ation by saying entry draft. Slot backs Stefan Ptaszek pick of He went on to add McMaster's Mike certain type player." Craig Brenner were the of offence he in the that he thinks that type chosen by BC and "I don't think that Morreale sec- his talents as a fullback ond round (seven- played in here kept Calgary in the first and it has set in yet, It took a strong quite teenth overall). somewhat of a secret. third rounds respec- evaluation for I don't think it will On at the camp tively. Linebacker paper performance in the to him to raise his stock pro team eyes. Stefan Ptaszek File Mike Chevers Ptaszek pic was until I'm on the appears plane that will to a team had Ham- be the most explo- Chevers report picked up by the in the CFL for the on the out" roster last to play money." way sive of the three, six linebackers on their year. ilton Tiger-Cats in the the four Laurier last so Notes: Of players a DB at linebacker - other used year fifth round. Stefan Ptaszek with the two "They attended the CFL evaluation need someone," he who camp, more I think that they may Ptaszek, an all-Ca- being posses- Those i . undrafted. defensive i he will work two were two, said. He went on to add that still had sion receivers. It remains to be seen how nadian his last two years at WLU, end Paul and wide receiver and on Stoppenbrink Lions to hard in the weight room increasing trouble containing his excitement two many of the three the plan keep he Andrew but have his before re- weeks after the fact. "I don't think that it on their roster, Ptaszek seems to speed Scharschmidt to in June. Brenner's talents are may think it will attitude about it. "In a it's ports camp has quite set in yet, I don't a good way return to Laurier make the the is because I'll be against What may until I'm on the plane on way out," good competing however unquestioned, next It stiff year. re- 22 old summed like Canadians, in- competition quite how the personable year guys myself, young has mains to be seen for Chevers is the sta- recognition about him stead of veteran Americans." up his feelings being picked whether will Canadian they to the tus of been ninth overall. He is the highest Laurier For Brenner to make the jump sometimes secure a pro he will be linebacker Glenn to be drafted since another slot back. CFL it looks as though fighting grad hard to come by tryout...Peter an Ail- overall someone for the to in Young. Young, Ken Evraire was selected ninth as right stay Calgary. outside of his team Gisborn, who at- fullbacks, American at Syracuse well by the Saskatchewan Roughriders in "They keep two, maybe three tended the Ti-Cats make his senior 1988. so I will have to beat someone out to year, spent training last year, has re-signed and He full- last season on the L.A. Raiders practice camp Brenner expressed similar feeling it." went on to add that veteran will be there this If he fails to stick there this again year...Surprisingly, about his selection by the Stampeders. back Andy McVey is planning retirement roster. year, didn't think that his selection in his owned Hamilton and he Ptaszek who this and that he was encour- rights are by The twenty-one year old, played pri- year or next, the draft was the highlight of his career to that. To his teammatesBrenner's has indicated he will report to the Ti-Cats. marily at slot back for Laurier will be aged by was all the date. "To me the highlight talents however All three players are expected to sign moved to fullback when he attends camp are unquestioned, recog- friends and that I met four and no good people my in June. Chevers said that there is still nition has sometimes been hard to come contracts shortly are expecting situation here."...He was the first player cho- he will outside of his team. The draft trouble reaching deals. The was years some question whether play at by perhaps the followed best summed by Ptaszek, "I sen from OUAA, by Guelph's middle linebacker, his position at Laurier, best illustrated this. Tim Tindale, who perhaps up I want Rob Wessling. Hec awards while decided a long time that didn't or be moved outside. picked up two Crighton ago

victory Clothing bargains M 7__- FACTORY OUTLET _

BARGAINS !! — BrandHNNames...

• Body Glove • Hi-Tech • Point Zero

Vogue • Speedo • Starter • Pass *7Z**-gifl» Backstage J r?J? Scratch • Farini • Glensport • Raisins .

Nat Lacen • Massimo

And Many More!!

CHECK OUT Savings Re ular #%()/ g OUR 100 $500 Up nil /o Retail To Price AND $ IOM OFF

SPECIALS

Purple and Gold

will be closed Sat.

Mon-Wed 9am - m 0 Esprit 6pm Saturday 9am - spm STORE HOURS: April 2/94 Thurs.Fri 9 am . m 9 Jm Sunda/ 12pm . 4:30p

—— ■ — — Mon-Thur: 9:3oam - 6pm ■

9:3oam - * Friday: 7pm VISA Mastercard • Cheques Accepted

Saturday: 9:3oam - 4pm SPORTS 13 THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994

The year's best & worst

SCOTT STINSON Mavericks. he the chance to of the New York Dallas Cowboys. The manowned Senators and Dallas May never get Saberhagen Cord consideration for Sports the Super Bowl. Worst Performance(Player) - find out. Mets gets some with this is it. - bleach - at So The year is almost Worst Performance(Team) Thurman Thomas, Buffalo Bills; Biggest Idiot (Non-player) squirting reporters

This award water Jose Canseco is over. This being the last regular New York Mets. These guys, looked like he was carrying a live goes to perennial con- a gun. a

a tender Steinbrenner, the double nominee. Not did he issue of the Cord, let's take a who many predicted would win hand grenade instead of foot- George only He bounce ball off his look back at some of the memo- their division, had at least two ball. Honourable mention to New York Yankees owner. a fly head and

over the fence for home he rable sports happenings during players face criminal charges, had Michael Jordan's spring training recently ripped Yankee pitcher a run,

school too much to and ended his this year. a player injured due to a team- effort. Jim Abbott for spending attempted pitch

Best work and in Performance(Team) -With mate swinging a golf club in the Hype of the time on charity not season by tearing a ligament You his the winner is kudos to the Chicago Bulls and clubhouse, and stumbled Year - Ton- enough time on pitching. arm. However,

without Vince ex-Met. His the Toronto Blue across the finish line with Nan- see, Abbott was born a Coleman, theirthree-peat, k ya.

became the team in 59 wins and 103 losses. Tele- hand and he has devoted of firecracker at a Jays first fif- cy. right tossing a group

of fans is in its idio- teen years to repeat as World Impressive. Honour- scoping himself to encouraging physical- unparalleled

Series Champs. The amazing part able mentionsto the metal ly challenged children to chase cy.

to Take is that they did it with a vastly Ottawa baton. their dreams as he did. How silly Athlete Most Likely

of him the Out K-Mart with an Uzi - different lineup the second Enough By way, Abbott's a

time around. Even the said. pitching seems to be okay. He Dennis Rodman, San Antonio This is leads most faithful of fans had Player had a no hitter last September. Spurs. guy nuts. He

in from to be worried after los- Most De- Get a life, George. the league ejections

ing Henke, Key, Win- serving of a Biggest Idiot (Player) - Lots of games and technical fouls. His O' J ' Career nominees Reed hair field, Lee, Maldona- Ending forthis one. Jody is a different shade every

- of weeks. He do, Gruber and Injury Derrick the Milwaukee Brewers gets few talks to none of

his when he's Derekßell. Despite Coleman, New Jersey some votes for turning down an teammates except

the Nets. million dollar with the court. Last after the losses, Jays This guy actually eight contract on week,

the After from the he managed to suc- turned down a contract L.A. Dodgers. finding being ejected game,

would him himself with offers free removed his and cessfully defend that have paid no as a promptly jersey

minor off court. This man their title. in the neighbourhood of agent, he had to sign a strode the is Best Per- eighty million dollars. league deal with the Milwaukee unstable. formance million Brewers for So there have it. Just Fifty-nine was a couple hundred you a

few who made their (Player) - guaranteed. Derrick thousand. people sport-

or bad, this Emm i t t thinks he'll get better His agent was also considered in ing mark, good year.

free the Bret Have a Smith, money as a agent. non-player category. good summer.

Baseball guessing game

JASON GILMORE Watch out for Baltimore! They unless Cleveland's off-season lost Otis Nixon and Ron Gant. Gonzalez/Dick Schofield; don't

Cord Dennis Jack The Phillies be if but there Sports have picked up super-hitter signings of Martinez, may hurting expect smashing bats,

is unable will be At Baseball season is here again!! Rafael Palmiero, slugger Chris Morris and slugger Eddie Murray John Kruk to recover stronger defense. 38,

off from that Ed will have more con- Some of you may be groaning at Sabo and a couple pro pitchers. (the 37+ club) somehow pay the cancer was recently Sprague a the A Yankees to clean detected. sistent offensive and thought of people getting healthy pitching staff this year, expect Chicago year slightly

in fever all will in contention. The house. the West, Texas The are to better defense. The left fielders wrapped up Blue Jays keep them In seems Expos supposed the be after be better lost will be Rob Butler and Willie over again, but for the true base- Blue Jays are said to still be to favoured, especially even though they

Will Dennis Martinez and traded Canate; ball fans out there, it's time to team to beat, although they lost signing free agent Clark and away they'll provide good DeShields I the field and the Play Ball! six players and only signed vet- a healthy Canseco; California (bad mistake, think). speed on on

heard about middle and Oakland The Florida? bases. Borders will I'm sure you've eran reliever Greg are going through Mets? Yeah, right! Likely go bye-

the the divi- Cadaret. Watch Seattle Get hitters! The Central Knorrand will the changes to way out though; ru- some sort of'rebuilding,' some bye; Delgado com-

mill Borders and Johnson still has in this is bit bine and sions are set up. Now it's time for mour has Pat (Randy aside) Division league a of for good power some

erratic a Houston defense. Ward will a little guessing game, or what Domingo Martinez being traded pitching. joke too; maybe or respectable

it Cinci will of a down his others call 'careful predictions' for starter Bret Saberhagen or In the National East, is go- pull something out have a year, given re- of 1994's the Ameri- Kevin be Atlanta hat. In the West it looks like San cent tendinitis, Stewart will im- champs. In Tapani! ing to messy. was a

I'd The A.L. Central is division winner last but has Francisco should unless not in will can League East, like to say a joke; year grab it, prove (if jail), as

L. A., behind a healthy Strawberry Stottlemyre (ditto), Guzman will

and DeShields pull a fast one. break 200strikeouts and cut down

Blue will Now for a little blurb of on wild pitches, Hentgen John Jay predictions: first baseman have a respectable year and so f\ Olerud, second baseman (a will A 1 Leiter. Cito will use the RF Joe bench this and lot healthy?) Alomar, more year use a

CF the "Thanks Mitch" Carter, more platooning to give rook- Spoltore Devon White and DH Paul ies some action. Molitor will all have similaryears A Three-peat? Jays fans say

last but little haters "I not". to year, maybe a "Yes", say hope * for the lower in some stats. At SS there October will tell, making Only my

will be a platoon of Alex friends.... CIAU All-Canadian

* Team m Hockey Hoopsters

NICK SCHLECHTA

Cord Sports Wayne On Tuesday, March 8, 1994, the first annual Kitchener/Waterloo . Hoopathon was staged at University Heights Secondary School. It

was a joint project between WLU physical education students and

the vk Huntington's Society Canada. The event was a success due to contributions of WLU students. It is nice know that Laurier Gowing many to take time of their students are willing to out busy schedules to benefit

a worthwhile cause. Close to $700 was raised, thanks in part to the for the being efforts of many first and second year WLU students. All involved had

time while their basketball WE would a good polishing up on skills. CIAU Hockey JVOb like to thank the many businesses including Sports Link, Runner's Choice, Olde English Parlor, Sparx Candy Store and the Royal Bank Coach-of-the-Year in for donating prizes. We hope that the future the even t can grow and

become a bigger success in years to come. March 1994 THE CORD Thursday, 24, 14 ARTS

Xl i ai t © in b Y o xi W b r & 't h TOW »

Aand 3

®acln o'th ©r W© !©©k©d at ,

Haeairtt m©IIt©d. Y©m samilsd aii mj eam©ti©aii§» 3 gav© y©mi My

Ami y©m guv® y©mr§* t© 3 ©peaied a c© aid milt y©iuu lhad. Sounding eveirytMang 3 3 l©©ked like, ¥©m dtdaiH

Y©m ©ally saw amy personality.

Y©m t©©lk my Iheart*

3 ai e v e r Ihad a (cIiiikc©,

Y © m mad© am e feel s © alive*

S© vilbraaat.

1 And a fit ©a y©nn disappeared,

3 was left al©me.

Witib ©ally a am e am © r y,

And f©r s©]me©m© ARTS a yearaniaig a 3 barely liew.

Seaai Wild© A

FISHER SHEFFIELD'S EPILOGUE

by Terry Grogan

video!" I won't to see of if were ever great campaign Joyce - a details, PART TWENTY- need something, my friend lifestyle, get you go- exclaimed her I "Jurassic Park" this summer." ing to be able to debate well joyfully, undoing woman, a new pair of shoes, TWO: mak- "Fisher?" after the hair, flicking her head and - but joining Republican don't know what you aren't her curls bounce and down "THE NUCLEAR as Vice-President in ing finding it here." "And I won't even get to ticket up

around on her bare shoulders...as FAMILY GOES "That's right..." 1 smiled, play /Mortal Kombat" at the 1996." her contact lenses, White House arcade next fail," I 1 looked over at Myra, smil- Myratookout "This is about new shoes...! gotta KA-BOOM!" threw them and on her winked at Chelsea. as she with put get new shoes."' finally over ing gently, played away, "But We're our triangle? her hair it around glasses, thin, silver metal-wire Barefoot, 1 watched as Joyce / "Daddy?" again, coiling

a family, in our own way," I translu- "So I this is about her index frames, magnifying her bent over and, one by one, 112 guess finger. looked she over at Myra, as blue making her sucked into her new shoes: I new "Prime Minister Fisher cent eyes...and my toes mouth, gotta get took out her kit, and to 25 began shoes." Sheffield: how body balloon by about leaving behind wet spit with her does that sound up cook another for up injection "Sir?" pierced tongue: and the stud in j to you?" pounds. me, "You're my girlfriend I stuck her mouth felt good when she "I have so much to live Myra: "OK, OK, OK?" Finally, just my who's mother," and then I and my foot I'll write Icontinued, clenched fists in the air, ran it along my like a for...Maybe my smiling atMyra: up at she glanced back Joyce as shouted alive that "Kim me she out: "I've come wave...a wave compared to autobiography...and get on a Campbell promised her and spread legs apart, The is mine the warm sense of relaxation methadone program...or else run wouldn't run, if I did...and I'm again! night again!

stuck my left foot in her that for Prime Minister of Canada... to make Mrs. Myra has given me back my quickly spread throughout going you Myra crotch, her thick scratching after I decent haircut...and if be wife." heart! has returned me to my body as Myra positioned my get a Sheffield, you'll my Joyce pubic hair, "while you're the At last, it's good right foot between her soft legs, a fresh pair of sneakers." "OK, OK, 0K?...1'm not politics! long sister I swim naked with." I shut...and but...l think to be alive!" wiggled my big toe, and shot it snapped my gun trying to bug you,

As loaded it back down the table. After brief I asked Myra up my up with heroin. put on I'll go under the name Myra a pause,

with her other hand said dis- Radakovich Sheffield...when fiancee: "Babe, check what needle, Joyce giggled, teasing, as 112 |'Fisher?...Dad they my It's late." she reached connected brain last run for the time it is, would down, grabbed my Myra emptied the syringe, her your April, you Tory leadership you? in with left right leg, and stuck my other brow furrowed with concentra- whileyouwere Chicago, this spring." Myra grabbed Joyce's

to the inner wrist to foot between her big brown tion. a lesion angular gyrus of "Hey! And I'll be yourcam- arm, twisting her

I the of brain's check the imitation Rolex thighs. opened cylinder my your temporal 10be... paign manager, Daddy!... Just gold

if I had You've been beneath "You know, just gun, and spun it, as Joyce sat writing gibberish imagine - Saturday, June 12, watch strapped left fist. been able rise to the back and ever since." 1993 -Brian and Vunderstruck's to up, smiling innocently, Mila, up on the pale moment...and be "OK OK? Then she told "OK, OK, agree to Myra straightened out, putting Myra: OK, convention stage, shaking hands me:

to her ...Now that some of the with Fisher and OK?...lt's one minute Reagan's running-mate...or away needle, pushing the explains Myra...We cut exactly

else Sarah's hair from her face. lists ve been hand- to -she's lover...everything away grocery you' Carolyn Mulroney cry- midnight." have I the would turned out differ- Joyce grinned, sticking out ing me lately ing - before fading back to just looked over at

her ent -not necessarily better, just wet tongue, laughing. | Joyce: "Hey! And what Fisher...Fle's reluctantly being President's daughter. those I'm - for me." about white train different "Fisher? If Myra can get her track handed the keys to the country "Starting right now, go-

-" I nose - and scars on forehead? Prime back Picking up my gun, pierced Joyce can get your by Minister Mulroney - ing to put it all together,"

twisted head and winked her won't S Chelsea continued: "He also but Mila and I my tongue pierced -why Myra are jumping promised her, winking.

at Chelsea Clinton, said to around calmly my Mom let me get my ears they were going take with excitement in the Chelsea: "How?"

told me: short-term - who finally "Fisher, pierced?" away your memory, background and then Fisher At that, I picked up my gun

I and a but fi- fore- even with blueberry, ruby-red, just ignored Chelsea as safeguard, Reagan turns around, hops down from from the table, put it to my

and frosted pink lip gloss grinned back at Joyce. nally decided against it, arguing the podium, and kicks Mulroney head, and pulled the trigger.

stains around "You know, if I that need the balls Blam! your collar, you keep up this you might some recall in ...My God! What a ARTS 15 THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994

tAie distance &e>e> offvn yoa a

t/e rAd fte/dta/a ofea aw

bee/etna t/e w-eawM fevom

eAement&j Aofitny tofendbome e&cafie fevom

tAte niuAt. an oAd6

amonabt tAte vocA& 4>twiL€>y'i/ tAte damage to

Ai& auttedajAte/re /joatj it<^an

&$ut tAte

candAe Aew Ata,nd&. AoAdiny a in

QdVowtAtwe&tv-ieai. Ravings of the Mad Poet (SAofet feadAina

Loneliness doom Atev aAtoaAdeand a/t ow dwewtncf

Lonely and sad. to bAeeftfeow tAte niaAt. d?/Ae feAame i&

We are together,

miAeb Ate . Yet so far away. /yyiyAt/y Q/AAa,ny aapay

Heartfelt and joy AooAs at tAte andtAte a/t moon ofe Terrified sadness. btawb coAoawtny tAte nie^At catcAtna

Where is love? eacAfeor Al iafew&t wi&Attny andAto/tincf. , It is right here,

With me,

Yet miles away. Ay ofcff

Longing.

Loneliness.

for My need you

Grows ever stronger,

But time stands in the way.

The trial is almost done.

Soon the loneliness

Will be forever

Gone.

Forever yours,

Tim Miller 16 FEATURES ore thanju 1971 An evaluation of tea ev These were commellts made by fac­ ulty at Laurier in 1971, after a MARK HEASLEY stalled out at the Students' Union. While paign. "We're not coming at them WLUFA (Wilfrid Laurier Univer­ Cord Features the anti-calendar would be expensive and knives drawn, we just want a fair sity Faculty Association) meeting. You can only kick the dead horse so probably create a lot of tension between He believes that the teaching They voted down a fJroposal to in­ many times before it falls apart on you. the faculty and the Students' Union, I for would be the perfect vehicle for clude any student participation in Yes there are problems aplenty with the one would be willing to take the price tag to make their voice heard. faculty hiring, firing or tenure de­ professor evaluations that we fill out, and the political risk rather than stay with I think that he just hit the nail on istration. cisions. zombie-like, every semester to let the the black hole system of listening to stu­ head. Its almost as if the students of Whe professor know what we "think" of their dent concerns. school aren't seen as a real part viewer tli Dr. Heller - (Dept. of Chemistry) teaching. Although nothing can be really re­ sometimes, only as drifters passil tions don' expressed surprise "that students We know the evaluations aren't use­ vamped until the Collective Agreement through its halls. twinkle fl are willing to go along with" ful, the administration knows they aren't between the faculty and the university WLUFA action. The students have useful, and the faculty knows they're not administration comes back to the table in lost influence, and should go after used. So what are we doing about it? 1996, the possibility of "teaching dossi­ more direct influence. As Students' Union VP for Univer­ ers" has been suggested in Article sity Affairs, Tim Crowder feels that "noth­ 31 :Teaching Evaluations of the current Dr. MacLean- (Dept. of Classics) ing can be done with the stats passed on collective agreement. .agreed "with the result although from the evaluations. What's the prof To make the most out of the evalua­ not with the way it came about." going to think - gee, I got a 3 in attend­ tions that it carries out on the faculty, the He feels that some "student input" ance. Next time I'll go for a 6? It was Students' Union is trying to alter the in the operation of the school is pretty much admitted to me thattheevalu­ proposed program so that the students' desirable and was disappointed that ations are being used to protect, not evalu­ evaluation would be included in a file no other plan was mentioned in ate the faculty" that would be used by a committee (none place of the def~ated one. To show the administration and the of which are students) that is considering faculty the contempt that they feel for the a professors' application for tenure, pro­ Dr. McMurray - (Dept. of Geog­ 'bubble form', the Union is going to try motion, or appointment (the decisions raphy and Planning) Although he to organize a boycott of the evaluations. are not made known to students). This was not at the WLUFA meeting In their place, the Students' Union file (which would not be available to McMurray noted that it "appears will be offering professors with feedback students) would not have to be an essen­ that the trend toward further liber­ forms that they can choose to give to their tial part of hiring/promotion process, alization at WLU may be levelling class and get the suggestions and criti­ however. off." The position of the students is cisms back directly. Scott McCormick will be taking VP short-term and hence they do not The idea of a student anti-calendar, Crowder's place next year on the Stu­ have the background to make hir­ that would consist of student evaluations dents' Union, and made student profes­ illi!:.and fuinj.1 de"!~jon~ "Student· of courses and professors seems to have sor evaluations a major part of his cam- shoulcf'be involved In ilepartmen­ tal committees, but when it comes to hiring and firing it is going too far." Anti--calendar at WLU? Dr. Heick- (Dept. of History) was STEVE DOAK course's strengths and weaknesses is in­ in favour of the decision. "I cannot Cord Features cluded, gathered from the general com­ see students getting involved to the A new system for students to evaluate ments made by students. degree that that resolution called courses and teachers has emerged in The power of the Anti-Calendar for." Canadian universities: Anti-Calendar. comes from the seriousness people treat INGRID NIELSEN Currently, the biggest and best of it with. Summaries of the evaluations are Cord Features these publicized evaluations is produced accessible, and students seem prepared Prof. Albright - (Dept. of Eco­ The bubble form is not the only means lr by the Arts & Science Students' Union to put more thought when they see these nomics) "No comment." evaluating faculty at Laurier. It ish (ASSU) at the University of Toronto. It effects. Because the students treat the ever, the only compulsory means. has been produced annually since the evaluations with more seriousness, the Dr. Weir - (Dept. of Economics) Laurier has a Centre of Instructi 1981-82 academic year, and is the most comments made are more valuable to the "No comment." Development. It's role is to "aid profls.. commonly used model for such publica­ professors and the administration. sors in improving their teaching throtf1 tions in Canada. Professors benefit by the identifica­ Dr. Bezner - (Dept. of Physics) self-improvement," says Dr.Bill M11, The Anti-Calendar was originally tion of weaknesses in their methods that stated that "while administrators Associate Director of Instructional De­ produced as a collection of the evalua­ can be improved upon. The administra­ are capable of making mistakes, I velopment. tions produced previously by each tion benefits with more thorough infor­ feel that if students were to partici­ The Centre offers two areas of de Course Union (the student associations mation to use when evaluating profes­ pate in this area that even more opment; teaching and learning. of each discipline within the faculty of sors for promotion or tenure. serious mistakes might occur due "I offer to all faculty. to administ a Arts & Science). This increased the effi­ Variations upon the evaluation form to their inexperience in academic mid-term evaluation. It's on presentation ciency and the organization of the meas­ currently used at Laurier are limited by matters." skills more than anything else." urements. the agreement between the University It involves handing out a questiol­ Over the past decade, the ASSU and the Faculty Association, but some Prof. Miljan - (Dept. of Political naire to the students in her/his class. There services, Anti-Calendar has evolved considerably. professors have expressed interest in an Science) felt that the general opin­ are 60 questions, as opposed to the stan l­ ments are For the 1992-93 academic year, the additional, more thorough method and ion of those present was tat the ard 15. The scale is based on "shou d ers." Dean's office participated in composing the publication of results. It would take a students are not sufficiently ma­ increase significantly" to "should These the document. A standardized list of few years to attract a significant portion ture, the faculty are the best deci­ crease significantly". on top of questions was composed to increase co­ of professors to the program, but if sion makers and that therefore there Some examples include: "The ' hesiveness and the process was compu­ ASSU's success is echoed here, such a should not be direct student in­ -Makes eye contact with students courage f terized. system could become a widely accepted volvement. It was his personal opin­ -Digresses from main theme of lecture students The questions used in the evaluation characteristic of WLU. ion, however, that "students should -Ad vises students how to prepare fortests -but I hav are similar to those used in student course Minimal costs would be needed for have a feeling of participation. Jus­ or exams don't." evaluations at Laurier. Students are asked an anti-calendar at WLU. The ASSU tice should not only be done but -Shows tolerance for other points of vic w When to rate qualities such as the effectiveness Anti-Calendar is budgeted at $31 500- must seem to be done." The idea is that if students see an - beingdra of the teacher's delivery, the fairness of mostly printing charges and staff wages. thing that needs improvement, the pof at all. He the teacher's marking, and the value of A similar publication at Laurier would Prof. Noonan- (Dept. of English) can choose to improve this area.l really assignments and labs. Beyond this, the incur less printing costs, because fewer topics had left the meeting very confused encourage professors to talk with tht If "I wa question sheet also includes space for courses are taught here and fewer copies about the proceedings. "They could students about the results, "says Marr of questio additional written comments concern­ would be needed to supply everyone who only vote for extremes." He ex­ About 30 professors are taking p; rt says Man; ing the professor or the course. wants one. As with other programs such pressed hope that this situation each semester, and about I 00-130 ha 1e Impo The Anti-Calendar includes brief in­ as the Foot Patrol, staff wages could be would change. taken part in the four years of its exit­ type of e troductions by each Course Union and minimalised by the use of volunteers. ence. tary for al the statistical data provided by the evalu­ All that is needed is initiative and "It may seem like a low number, lilt almost ah ations. As well, a brief summary of each organization. it's not the sort of thing you need toJo seek addi rsday '-Aarch 24, 1994 FEATURES 17 a free pencil? chq evaluations at Laurier 1994 The following is remarks from mem­ AMANDA DOWUNG reached for the trusty agreement. The - course organization; bers of the Laurier Community re­ Corel Features official document was thrust before the - objectivity and promptness in grading, garding the current, standardized and The Collective Agreement. Aah, that interviewer, it's blinding pink cover blaz­ commenting on and mandatory teacher evaluation forms. wonderful document of democracy. That ing in the sunlight. "We would like to returning course assignments; old and faithful scapegoat of the admin­ have students write comments ... but we -availability and co-operativeness of the istration. can't." said Dean Read, "It's not in the Faculty Member; Jim McCutcheon- (Dept. of Busi­ When asked by an inquisitive inter­ Collective Agreement." - whether the Faculty Member gives ness) If you want my very blunt state­ viewer this week why teacher evalua­ The document was quickly replaced classes as scheduled; ment on the thing, I would say "Yeah! tions don't allow for student comment, a to it's sacred spot on the desk at the -the audibility and clarity of the Faculty Don't fill the thing in." twinkle flashed in Dean Read's eye as he Dean's left hand where it is kept for easy Member in oral reference. It sits there now, ready for the communications." next time a quick escape is needed from Further to this, it dictates that "all Dean Art Read- (Arts and Sciences) a similar confrontation. questions shall be constructed so that the Sometimes we do stupid things and What exactly does the Collective answers may be aggregated by simple don't include students. Agreement say about the student's role in statistical procedures." Student comments teacher evaluation? cannot be aggregated in this way, thus The text reads like the ten command­ they cannot be included. Dr. Kieth Horton- (Dept. of ments: "There shall be a uniform Univer­ It was the administration who intro­ Pyschology) Even very good instruc­ sity questionnaire." states section 31.2.3. duced the idea of a standardized, univer­ tors can have bad courses. "Student evaluations shall be obtained sity-wide evaluation of faculty. Many through the questionnaire administered faculty opposed the idea because older by the University ... " continues section forms which provided room for student Dean Robert Ellis- (Dept. of Busi­ 32.4. Every aspect of the teacher evalua­ written feedback were often returned with ness) I worry that there could be too tion process is spelled out in meticulous nasty and malicious comments. After much of a focus on numbers. The detail. some debate, the faculty accepted the teaching assessment may be too nar­ The agreement goes on to state that student evaluations that are in use now: row. evaluations "shall seek an assessment of all numbers, no comment. all and only: The current Collective Agreement Dr Mike Moore- (Dept of English) If - clarity of the course objectives, and expires in March of 1996. It is only then I were an administrator, I would be extent to which they that the powers that be will consider extremely nervous to use this (evalu­ are met; changes to the current form. Students ation form) to approach a faculty - understanding and competence in im­ will continue to have no comment until member. There just nothing to use. parting course material then. .- ason Anderson- (SBE- Student Council President) What students Democracy £ evaluations want is to see different weights to INGRID NIELSEN that they may have to explain and de- different questions. For example, Cord Features fend their reasoning before, at least, the more on communication. "It's like democracy - the only thing candidate. worse is all the alternatives." "The administration does not want Dean Anne Hall- (Faculty of Music) Dr.Mike Moore, English depart- to use these forms heavier than they do Evaluation forms are only one factor ctinalternative in the process. The information is ment, feels strongly on the issue of stu- now because they can't control the proc­ dent evaluations. There is no shortage of ess," says Moore. useful, but it's not enough. every class, every term," says Marr. controversy on this topic as everyone 'Tm entitled to confront my ac­ Another method is peer consultation. seems to be dividing up into camps - cuser. That is an element of natural jus­ Dr John McMenemy- (Chairperson Marr says this is "the most effective" students versus professors, good profes- tice," says Moore. of the Dept. of Political Science) The approach. sors versus bad. Students used to be a lot more in- best opportunity students have, across After a faculty member requests a What role should students play in volved in hiring, contracts, and tenure the university, is the course evalua­ peer consultation, three or four profes­ the professor evaluations? Are decisions, "and I liked that," says Moore, tion forms. sors are asked by IDC to sit in on the they qualified to deal with such ,'" "but it became apparent that students candidates classes, talk with him or her, life-altering,careerdecisions? ./ • • had a very limited agenda. If Dr Arnold Frenzel- (Dept. of Eco­ and administer a general survey to all Some students are fight- / _.-'.:;:\ pressed they would always nomics) I can see the student students in the class. ~ ing. for a much more influ- / ;; ''\:;-§?r... ~~%t, say that teach~ng is the frusrtation, and faculty too - there The evaluators also meet with a focus isn't alot in there that we can usefully group of seven or eight students. ent1al role. They feel ~hat j -~ "·~~:,;:. ~;.·:~::~. '.t;,.,~";;: •""•• only thmg they no one could better dtf- . ~- ___ .... """"'~) ·~ : .~ . ·_ "'"· care about." use. A report is written up, and given to ferentiate a good ~· .::S:::-2.~~;::··, .. ' ... >··<' "" .... ···., ·., However, the prof in question. The report is strictly y-· ··~- ""'~- '«;;;">-~ • _'It- ' ·, , ',A •' """"'11:<•: ...... • Ryan Feeley- (Communication Stud­ "teacher" from a bad _ ·::::-·~·~~?-i:~;·· J· ··:...~<:;-. ! .~ ,-.._, on a commit- confidential. teacher. But "what :.:::.:.:_::·-<~- . \ :--~. •~:- ..~- :':· tee with that ies student) The way the form is set Although Dr.Marr wouldn't say __ ... ,,:-...... ,...... '~ up, it's really hard to nail a prof that are the purposes of ·-- - ~-.:::::~~>· . : ··, .. :·, .. :.::;\;;,,,> . idea, they are which departments have utilized these . d ~~--- ...... • • ' • ,, '··,'· d . h . does all their teaching off overheads. t h ts process, an ~;:::-.;··~ .• ....,. '·, · :'~ • \• · ">, """' ••• • · not otng t etr services, he did say that "some depart­ """"""' ..,..~ ''\,1.....'\"- ''\.' . ;~- "v...... , . how much re- ... ·:::.--..... ,,...,,·,.\ , \•. '.\ '• , '-.~- JOb. There are ments are more likely to use it than oth- • • • ---...... ,. .· ~+ . -~ \" ~ \- ;,'l. ,- .• -,·--, ...... Sheldon Page- (Editor of the Cord) ers." sponstbtltty are : ~·,::....":""' -..... · '··~ -. ,·~·\\\'~· ._-, -~:.:.::.,"·. ~hree areas. to con- students ready ~, -~ · ::;;· . '",; "' · ''·..,~ .. -. · stder; teachtng, re- You mean there's more to it than free (. These evaluation techniques are done .,._ .. ,....._,_- ...... ,_ ': "\...... pencils? to accept?" ::'. ..:.::.'-:--i~,.;.~-~~>~.,:,·, , · *·; search, and university on top of the standard forms. ·,., ... , ..., ... "i.·.-::- ·. .,_~ ..• ::~'~.-"... ·. "My sympathies Idents courage faculty to seek feedback from ....• .-: .. :-.... ""'"" ...... ,...... ,,,"< :,,_ dents want •· ~~-.,::'~'·:::.-:- ..;""<. >~ are strongly on the side of b of lectun students other than the 15 question form ' ' . •• "'-'· ··'· ··"" ...... "' ... '' · ' .. _ •· • d h' " Stay tuned next year for more t hetr tnput to .~::-..·'· ·.:. ·-~·~~, ,,.. ..~:::.-~< goo teac tng, says pare forte~ -but I have a strong suspicion that many ~ .. ~.... ' ~ " . :",. __.,;_,.J-' ...... be worth more on ...... _;<-:h ':-·~:~ " .. ~ ··?,~·- Moore, "but not everyone's thoughts on student partici­ don't." the bargaining table, are '• """:~;t':~'!':• 7~··· ; are. Students have to realize, pation in faculty evaluations. b~ intsofvi• When the Collective Agreement was nts see ar being drawn up, Marr was not approached they willing to follow through · ':,~ .. !', · .. ~~·· this is a scholar institution." legally? Every other opinion and ···<.: . Moore, along with many nt, the p1 at all. He entered the process later when Correction: piece of information has to be verifi- others in the Laurier community, rea. I rea topics had specifically been designated. In last week's feature, I incor­ able. Are students able to verify their i s completely dissatisfied with the k with th "I was surprised when I saw the list rectly titled the article on Wicca opinions, should they be challenged? standardized evaluation form. i!says Marr of questions that had to be included," "Wicca is not Witchcraft". In fact, That is only in the case of student "I don't see these forms as being of ~ taking p says Marr. Wicca is Witchcraft, it's society's representatives on the committee. If it's any help. If I were an administrator, I 00-130 hn Important to remember, is that this interpretation of Witchcraft that is the entire student body, how can anyone would be extremely nervous to use these of its exi type of evaluation is completely volun­ in error. My apologies, Sean. be held accountable for the criticism to approach a faculty member. There's tary for all faculty. Marr admits that it is Ingrid they provide. Everyone else on the pro- just not enough to go on. You don't get number, I almost always the good professors that motion and hiring committees accept the faintest idea of what's going on." u need to seek additional feedback. I brain. I This is your

"'"^L

■ jjop" a .■■ i^vC-.. '/AHV '

■jqfc. TnHfv.-. . . jjk

'AfflUp ivAj3s(ugfl£«L .

fiQth^HjhoQßPP^BK'.« /?88f S s9^r ' oHH^

'''< | !•''' l ■ ii

■Ik' - ' 3K / jHafr'' MHb oMw • J^K,^H||^HR

A^vj^HylHF

I This brain I is your on I Saturday night. I |s**r

I free before 9:00 I I 341 MARSLAND DR. WATERLOO I entertainment

Still Getting Good Head

SELENE MacLEOD

Cord Entertainment

I was really looking forward to the Volcano that fine, hungover evening. It wasn't bad, by any

it wasn't I means, but as good as was expecting. March 18,1 saw a dinosaur: Hamilton, Ontario's

Teenage Head. "This band is not dead yet." The scheduled opening band cancelled due to injury, so the headliners delivered two sets of

nearly an hour each. Not bad, for old guys. Their fifties-ish brand of cigarette-smokin', leather- jacketed punkabilly kept the

it crowd dancing, although was a slightly older crowd than the

Volcano usually gets; so foronce,

there was no mosh pit. Wow, I never thought I'd see the day!

High points included a from-the-

groin slow blues rendition of

"Heartbreak Hotel", and the frontman's fancy footwork.

Once I made it past the bouncer, I conducted a short, rather stilted interview with the bandmemembers: drummer

Mark Lockerbie, vocalist/guitar- ist Howard Frankie, guitarist

Gord Lewis, and bassist Steve

Mahon. I felt really lost without my tape recorder, 50... "It's just rock and roll, just another night for us," Frankie

told me. The band is always busy, always working. They plan to release a new record in a few

months, (there's no word yet on a title or a label). A SoundTrack On The Biting Edge

SHAWN CALLAN probably are.

Cord Entertainment fun that This is a record, perfect for summer

movie for 90's Yes, drive best friend's However, be- WHAT'SHapping The 90's the graduate. reality to your cottage. Bites is sides U2's "All I Want Is the album may bite but the soundtrack for Reality You", danger-

to down for and soft rock mush. CKMS Benefit Concert fea- Receital Hall March 30 pretty good. Trying pin a sound a ously borders on pop idiocy

certain audience, Reality Bites features new There is no real depth or substance to the record and turing Paul McLeod, Tristan Faculty of Music students help target so-called alternative the Juliana Hatfield be called Lite. and of Cham- tunes by can appropriately Reality However, Psionic, Billybut Fishpants to perform a concert

3 and Crowded House, as well as classic such the record was not to be more than is at the Volcano March 24 ber music March 31 songs trying anything be if as Squeeze and the Knack's "My Reality Lite, and can enjoyed this is in Murder at the Howard She Stole My Beer is at the "Tempted" by kept Sharona". mind. Johnson's is presented in KW Volcano April 1 You never really come down from the "My The only bomb on the album is the full length Live Theatre's "Stage One" Bachman is taking care of busi- Sharona" when of Hawkes's "I'm theatre until Lulu's 2 high (especially subtly altered by inclusion Ethan Nuthin", in all black-box tonight ness at April

to Winona), and this somehow it's He's no Beck. A better choice would March 26 Student, Staff and Faculty Art myself My high glory.

makes the rest of the sound better than they have been Hawke's love tribute to the The Fureys jig at the Centre in Show at the Robert Langen Gal- songs delightful Ms. Ryder: "Add It Up". Dinosaur Jr.'s "Turnip the Square March 25 lery here at WLY until April 2 Farm" bears fruit while the Lenny Kravitz contri- WLU Jazz Ensemble performs The Rheostatics are at Lulu's

bution is a little a slow, in the Recital Hall March 25 April 8 disappointing: whining

Daniels effort on his Cheap Trick wants you to want The Charlie Band part. Crowded House 26 The new album is supposed to them at Lulu's March stomp Lulu's April 9

WLU Choir and WLU Sym- The Jim Rose Side Circus be pretty good and their track "Been Locked Out"

indicates that the talk is true. phony Orchestra perform at brings its own version of Squeeze's 'tempted' is and but I have been told it is the Receital Hall March 27 raunchiness to Lulu's April 15 light catchy, a

different version than the in The Wizard of OZ is at the Sarah McLaughlan is at the one played the movie. Mountain's of Peter I Centre in the Square March 28 Centre in the Square April 19 Big cover Frampton's "Baby Love Your is likewise and daft but until March 30 The Levellers are at Lulu's Way" light you

WILL be it later in Music at Noon concert in the April 22 caught humming to yourself the

March 29 and the Receital Hall Garden Bros. Circus is at the day, probably at most inappropriate time. Other contributors include Faculty of Music student com- Kitchener Memorial ArenaApril World Pary, The their the The Lisa and Phi posers show stuff at 22-24 Posies, Indians, Loeb, Me Me.

Overall, a decent soundtrack. THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 20 ENTERTAINMENT Country Wife Amazing

Consistency in costuming ANNE FERGUSON through the complicated plot, audience's full would also have lent more cred- Cord Entertainment demanding the to the 1950s While attention. Word around the lobby ibility setting. So who took me up on going to and that the had moved too the swirls, spots stripes of the play? Anyone? From where I was play con- the design enhanced rather than fast, leaving many feeling sat, not too many lethargic Laurier detracted from the the fused and lost. We members of play, cos- students strapped on their run- in our tumes ranged from 1950s dress the class were priviledged ners for the trek to University of and to a Hood intense of the play, hybid cowboy-Robin Waterloo's Theatre of the Arts. study look. The charac- immune to plot com- stereotypical the somewhat Save, of course, most of famed were dressed as such; while Had we not spent ters En 355 class which braved the plications. it this created additional humour it weeks working on it however, cold to attend one of the best rendered blatant would have been extremely diffi- once again too student productions I've ever something which should have cult to follow. seen. left theaudience If the wasn't convoluted been to to slowly That's right, I'm back writ- plot

someone decided the discover. ing about William Wycherly's enough, is all accents - This perhaps greatest The in actors should adopt my Country Wife which, case - with the some better than others to com- quarrel performance; U you hadn't heard, was at of was left to chance the it little more. Consist- nothing as W's Theatre of the Arts last week. plicate a

audience was force-fed should have been a goal to every Closing out the Drama Depart- ency careful lest be lack- strive towards, however; one nuance, we ment's 25th anniversary season characterexhibited blatant North ing in the mental ability required with a bang, the production was Americanese tendencies in the to figure it out ourselves. Mrs. very successful. for who midst of pseudo-Brittish lan- Pinchwife, example, The actors sped and whirled from the while the French moves the country into guage, type-cast

and catches on maid didn't even attempt the ap- town quickly to

the of her world, is propriate accent; maybe for the ways new in Bravado Hot! best. introduced as an innocent. Just missed it Sir Jasper spoke so quickly case we though, physi- (her voice and that deciphering devices should cal clues move-

the added. While Leanna models crawl under their have been distributed at door; ments) were TANYA KING and The Bay. These can Music Factory and Horner, the central charac- Nash performed exceedingly Cord Entertainment make anything look good, but chairs. mirth seemed lose ter, made too much of his affecta- well, generating frequent Usually when I review some sort can they make it look good on The second act to intrica- in the audience, her that the tion, detracting from the character, of live production I takeoff points me? This scene was excellently some of the excitement cies of the His like many others, left no room for for that the is but first act contained, but continued language. per- every minute show choreographed, provocative, that be formance left no doubt his interpretation. late in starting. This would mean not a sexual turn-off. to extraordinary compared to Granted who hasn't I've been character was false and affected, anyone Friday night's presentation of My favourite scene of the other fashion shows to. of Lisa cunning in his plan to bed as had the pleasure a year in EN Bravado would lose 10 points, night was "Swing Heil". Original designer the the married women as possi- 355 probably appreciated but considering the amount of Fairweather and Stars provided Demarte produced most in- many ble. his overtness of the I which throwback set of for the Unfortunately glaring production. bonus points gave the evening's clothing are a teresting clothing with it brashness, to the familiar Granted was funny and fast- performance, minus 10 is only a to the British influenced clothing evening, seemingly straight out eye the and left and Granted minor infraction. supposedly worn by the German of Fashion Television. They were play, was insulting paced entertaining.

for the subtleties of the actors did a fabulous and The Bravado fashion show "Swing Kids" of World War 11. designed for the underground no room job that I haven't student club I wonder how original text. seen a pro- was definitely a highlight in my The swing dancing was amazing scene; many Wycherly's

1 The best accent and duction this in a time. life here at Laurier. So let's take and the clothing was wonderful. people would notice if showed arguably good long

the best was deliv- concensus at the the Act one was rounded out at dressed as a Tomato performance Granted the post- you through evening's high- by up Phil's

the ered Roberts as was overall a lights. clothing by Stag Shop; the Soup can, a Kraft macaroni box, by Dylan play gathering posi-

inblack in Pinch wife, the dictatorial tive one. The first number provided us girlscameoutdressedall or a straight jacket. jealous

with look the de- boas The husband who threatens to carve Given all of these conces- a at original carrying (feather ones, not evening was truly great. the word whore into his wife's sions, I ask that next time signs of Heather McLeod. The constrictors, although that would The cast was both talented and only

men dressed in black have been comfortable the The forehead if she will not write his someone decides to produce were capes really interesting to on stage. The he William The Coun- and the solitary woman in white. see). The Next Exit, featuring choreography was incredible. It words. moment began to Wycherly's

show bold- old Star Trek Wife, one As the haunting music played on Esprit and Crossings, showed off was definitely a of speak episodes try they acknowledge the audience in of the and Producer flashed mind as I that their audience has in- was awe some wonderful, summer play ness high energy. through my thing; flowing choreography. I'm not clothes. And the entire cast and Robert Yeung has a great deal to watched a young and remarkably telligence enough to grasp some

about the of the the subtleties with- sure where one would wear these crew showed off moves and cho- be proud of, let's hope he brings energetic Scotty prance play's

it back in fits of them forced it. outfits, but hey, maybe we should reography that would make C&C next year. stage rage. out having upon all try everything once!

Scene two's clothes were NOW FOR LESS THAN I 111 1 great summer wear provided by the Funhouse and Magic Moun- THE PRICE OF THE jfljj Jl tain. The crew showed off their A NEW fantastic hip-hop dancing abil- TAX ON <■■]} ity, leaving the audience breath- for COMPACT DISC Save your letters less (or maybe that was due to

first of the sexual our taste aspect RENT YOU CAN k because of the show). September apart

The audience was next ONE At... treated to Leather by Chef. When from Classifieds j they announced that the audience

look for Lee was to out Tommy The Cord excited, but Jones, I got really then the girl beside me pointed is rintin P § no new material this out that it was only his jacket EMPORIUM from Under Siege. This scene, year - Next Week's however, had one small down- fall. As simulated oral sex oc- our awaited the T © week curred on the stage audience Open D@y§ long shifted uncomfortably in their

I 11 -S'S&i 11 - 6»Sun 1 -(i RETROSPECT! issue. seats (thank heavens didn't bring Weekdays I I my grandmother). guess should have realised something CD EMPORIUM' m was when I was greeted by up (and don't create any news for a "some material be offensive" WATERLOO may *402 Kinc Street, Unit Cl. (besioe Harvev'Vj. ￿ signs at the door. whlle because we can 1 cover II ALSO-BUYING AN CELLING USED CD'S ' ' Both females and males in the audience appeared to enjoy dammit!) m 'j&rd mfmouth business-p&ss it en! the lingerie by Amore Lingerie ENTERTAINMENT 21 THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 Readers Poll Resuits

/ - Sexiest Woman Alive: wasn 't quite sure what to expect Interesting answers Iron pant to the downright sombre. A last minute addition to the list 15) when / with the idea I There the came up for Maiden, Motorhead, Lawrence The Final Call for Cheers, not (thanks Lynn, owe you), Meg was quite a log jam at

this Laurier studreadersents the winner. A for this Tied for poll. Welk, Grateful Dead (oops, *of* even one of the choices (please Ryan was clear top question.

have record Demi Winona Pamela seem to a of apathy. the nineties, or *in* their nine- forgive me), came out of nowhere very distant second was first was Ryder,

However, 1 was pleasantly sur- ties?) to beat the last episode of Mash Moore. Maybe she Denise Anderson (Baywatch and

with the number for Van- Home prised of people 6) Favourite type of television by one vote. The better pose Improvement Fame),

who took the time to actually fill programming Bills Losing ity Fair again. Cindy Crawford, Sharon Stone

this There and Roseanne Arnold There out poll. are definitely Sitcoms blew the rest of the field th e Winona Ryder (?).

some creative there. 1 with distant in third. is also tied for people out away, sports a very Superßowl :ame a large group sec-

would like thank who second. This be ond - Demi to everyone would largely (XXV Interesting an- Moore, Whoopi

time to / Mike took the participate, and due to the short attention spans of XXVII) came swers: Tonya Goldberg, Sherilyn Fenn,

would wish which hinderthem in third. Rosenblatt and Sloan... to congratulate our moststudents, Noth- Harding (did you Greg

winners. Their and from that lasts like her when what! You sick. I'm contest names grasping anything ing being see face people are

the than half hour. kicked she broke her much than Rosenblatt. prizes they won are printed longer a Now, wher sexier

elsewhere this So without where Who else? - Julia Mariah on page. was 1... you're down. lace), Miss Roberts,

here's theResults Grace El further adieu, of Interesting answers - commer- Here is what Piggy, Carey, Meg Ryan, le

the First Annual Cord Isabella Entertain- cials, surgery, weather, cartoons, your peers Fones, Tracy Macpherson, Rossillini,

Readers Poll. Drew Julia Louis ment Enjoy. cooking shows, infomercials, thought were the Lords, Madonna, Dreyfus.

Just - Mrs. Greg Sloan learning channel, parliamentary greatest television Barry more. plain bizarre

Entertainment Editor channel, unpredictable Spanish moments: Leafs Lamb Chop Butterworth, Tonya Harding, The

sitcoms Win the Cup in '94, and myself, One That Says Yes, Grace Jones,

show: 1) Preferred music type: 7) Favourite TV. Geraldo's nose gets ''Greg Sloan. Ru Paul, Carolyne Mulroney,

whatever that Seinfeld was number Bono Just until Ariel - Alternative, means, your one broken, swear wait you see my (from Little Mermaid

beat Classic The and Mel and narrowly out Rock choice, narrowly beating ingontheGrammies, man next picture. yikes), Tanya (Dy-

the favourite of music for Star walks the when Brenda Favourite Band of as type Simpsons by just one vote. on moon, 13) All Time: namic Duo)

Next Homer in the land Novel You Want Laurier students. Sadly, country Trek: The Generation was a got arrested, of Voting was tight, with U2 com- 16) One Would

four close third. a only managed votes. I weep chocolate, topless "Price is ing out on top, Aerosmith in sec- To See Made into Movie:

for this school. - Interesting answers Welcome Right", Jays win World Series, ond and the Police placing third. There was no consensus at all for

- Back Interesting answers Eighties Kotter (they're still making Geraldo's A 1 Capone's vault, What, no votes for Honeymoon this one. Literacy is alive and Little Cheese Rock, Bagpipes, Polka, these?), House on the Prai- Chuck and Di's Wedding, Gold Suite? I'm shocked. kicking at Laurier.

Celtic Death Metal, loud and rie, The Urban Peasant, Check- Medal Shootout, Henderson Rocking In The Free World: who English Lit: 1984, Animal Farm,

Folk. Club for Men When to? in grumbly and Russian ers the Clown, Hair scores for Canada, Joey exactly are we listening Shane, Stranger a Strange

Favourite based Lawrence lost his Rockers: Stone Fifth Pride and 2) Laurier per- infomercial, CKCO News, virginity on Roses, Mega- Land, Business,

Blossom Bon Eric Homer's The former: Thunderbirds, (I hope Blossom, Bon Jovi day on death, Jovi, Ratt, Prejudice, Odyssey,

Laurier John Sound and the A Despite the tag that stu- they were only kidding) Hogan's MuchMusic 5 years ago,Final epi- Clapton, Crowded House, Fury, Prayer for

Kitchener of Owen Sunshine Sketches dents are apathetic, some of you Heroes, and High sode Cheers, Gulf War on Mellencamp, REM, Nirvana, Meany,

of the local School Girls Chan- Masturbation Van of Little Town are strong supporters Volleyball on CNN, episode on Journey, Halen, INXS a

Your nel 20 Seinfeld. CanadianContent: North- but who would star?: Ac- music scene here at Laurier. Rush, Okay,

the Blue the overwhelming choice was 8) Cheesiest Show Of All Time: 10) Favourite Movie ern Pikes, 54-40, Rodeo, counting Textbook, Diction-

Matthew You felt that there lot of It that Laurier students Gowan The Essential Calvin and Flaming O'Haras, with are a seems Tragically Hip, ary,

win- of The Kama Fisher Osbourne a distant second. cheesy shows out there. The watch a lot movies. This ques- Off The Beaten Path: Darkside, Hobbes, Sutra,

Part The Tao Te Interesting answers - Helen ner was Saved by the Bell, with tion also saw a wide range of Pet Shop Boys, Housemartins, Sheffield 8,

Mein Sears Cata- Stoumbos (?), Dean Nichols, The-Greatest American Hero answers, from Reservoir Dogs to The Smiths, Fishbone, Tom Ching, Kampf,

we Char- The of Sex and View Jennifer O'Connell, Samuel placing second. What if gave Sixteen Candles. The clear win- Waits, Chris Deßurgh, The logue, Joy

Morrison (Fish), Dave Bigioni, Screech the red suit? Full House ner, however, was Star Wars. latans UK, Digable From The Farm

the also made These 800 What You Registrar People, Ralph a strong showing. are your favourites...? Planets, Radleys, / 17) Personality

Reefer The The Would Like To See Spoltore and myself, Greg Sloan Interesting answers Madness, Slap Shot, Pee

3) The best local bar: Thunderbirds, Let's Make A Wee's Big Adventure, Debbie Just plain weird: Dead:

beer Chico and the Does Flesh this Wilf's, green or not, won Deal, Man, Chips, Dallas, Gordon, Deep ABBA, Village Jkay, so ques-

Phil's Mod Throat Walter tion little cruel. quite handily. was second, Partridge Family, Squad, (you people got to get out People, wasa

Brew and New But admit it. There's with the Turret a close third. Only WhataDummy, A-Team, Mighty more), Grease, Strange Ostanak,

So Power of The there two people picked The Twist. Morphin Rangers a slew Kevin Costner movies Kids On somebody out

who the hell all these Greatest TV. Moment 11) Favourite Film Actor: Block, Menudo would like are people 9) you to see

who show week? not and The from It up there every ever: Acting ability was always Chip- hanging a noose. for - Bar Wa- Since a criteria these selections. munks for few Interesting answers at we are seems, a people

terloo Rec Complex, The Legion the tel- How else do you explain 14) Sexiest anyway, that person would

best evi- be Michael Jackson. C'mon. 4) The place to see a con- Ralph Macchio, Gary Man Alive:

Coleman and The wide Leave the alone. cert in K-W: Shaquille poor guy

O'Neil it this He's related Wow. This was a close one, making on open vot- to LaToya, isn't

with list? The how- in this that A second two votes sepa- winner, ing enough? strong

rating first from ever, has proven him- category al- was Bob Saget, with or without

third. Phil's self to be the actor's lowed for almost any- the Full House gang. Tied for

and The third Rush was actor, proves thing to happen. result, was Limbaugh,

that of has overwhelmed. Andrew Dice first, some you well, me sortof Clay and Ziggy

Centre do have some The sexiest man alive, according from Much Music.

Take in the taste. a to many of your peers, is me, 18)The one band you would see

Square bow, Jack Greg Sloan. I'm not kidding. I at Laurier: The second, and Nicholson, held off a strong bid by Ethan Tragically Hip, Kingston's

deserve Hawke would be Lulu's third. you to come out on top. proudest sons, your

it. Jack Hawke's number Some people popularity was probably one choice to perform on

bolstered his must have narrowly by recent appear- Campus. Rage Against the Ma-

to beat in side chine in the money left ac- ance Reality Bites, along came second, while

these Tom I and the Beatles tied tually go to Winona Ryder. can only imag- Aerosmith

ine what would have if for places. Tanks, happened third, as long as they don't had made Interesting answers - who I just a movie with bring Yoko Ono with them. Other

choices None (too expensive), just came Winona Ryder. MMMMMM, were Van Halen, Pearl off Winona Cornerof King and Uni- a career per- Ryder... Jam, U2, Peter Gabriel, andßush

in versity, it depends where formance Philadel- World at large - Jerry Seinfeld, winners

the best concert would be, phia. Harrison Ford and Bono, Mel Gibson, Val Kilmer, Cerebella T-Shirt: Laura

the Legion (?), Steve's bed- Kevin Costner tied for third. Gary Oldman, Paul Molitor, Tom Rosenquirst

Who deserves the Classifieds room baby, Atrium, the Net- sion Oscar? Some Cruise, Sean Connery, Harrison for a year: Tim Solie

of other choices: work (?!) and 139 A Weber St. genera- your James Ford, Kevin Costner Keystone Yearbook:

Donald North. tion, we should Woods, Tommy Chong, I hope you're kidding - Mickey Christine Maki

5) Best Group of the Nineties: be best able to choose Sutherland, Jeremy Irons, Rooney, Prince, George Burns, Honourary Submissioninto Sbbh...lt what Answers ranged from Garth just was the greatest Humphrey Bogart, Christian Ernie or Bert, William Shatner, Happens: Larry Latourneau

moment ever. This Slater, Robin Brooks to Soul Asylum. The win- television Williams, Gary Brian Mulroney, Pee Wee Miscellaneous Grab Bay of uusi-cal

more than the received the widest hts: (and must ner, with ten votes question Oldman, Jimmy Stewart. Herman and Elvis (I specifically Delif you keep them)

the Favourite - Andrea and Skelton next contender, was Pearl Jam. range of answers, from flip- 12) Film Actress: said ALIVE!!!!) Murray Jim THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 22 ENTERTAINMENT Spotlight On Wlu Talent

who comes from the small and the of Toronto, town Garbutt has com- University CHRISTOPHER SKALKOS "When I started playing, I To date, because of Minden Ontario. chose to to Laurier Entertainment and with Laurier's figure skat- go Cord was playing on a organ peted pump music lessons allowed to take a second Teaching and Social Con- she was acted as the When ask most music stu- feet weren't enough [to ing team, you my long odd she switched performing jobs during her Music Students Consequently had vener for the study. dents at Wilfrid Laurier Univer- reach the floor] so mom my is summers, Garbutt for- her instrument of study looking under the and Association, conducted a term as major sity why they decided to study to lay down organ ward to graduating this April and from piano to the trombone. with her hands," vice of the Jazz Coun- music, they can recite a push the pedals president usually Teacher's over U of going to in various Choosing Laurier College. in- she added. cil and has played jazz profound reason or credit an deci- Garbutt doesn't T Western was a tough Ironically, want choirs and wind ensem- and spirational incident. Throughout high school, bands, to teach music for a In- sion make, but due to the peo- living. bles. One ofher most memorable to But for Dianne Garbutt, Garbutt was heavily involved in she to take five she has met, Garbutt says she stead, plans years occurred two ple stu- music lessons, school activities experience years fourth year music-education decision. off to form a rock band and has not regretted the "go while academics were when Garbutt co-organized dent, she has no hesitations tell- and clubs, ago for it." "The are really great band" that was formed people that the Partridge Family on the back-burner. Nearing the "spirit ing you put Garbutt so good Currently, jams with the when here, I've made many her to at Skydome influenced her to study music at the end of university pro- perform rock band from her home Vanier friends. With the music program a town, Garbutt finds theGolden Hawks won the Laurier. gram, history re- covers from [at Laurier] being so small you performing April "We Fam- itself she has accumu- were big Partridge peating as Cup. and Pat Benatar to the know it's like a big Wine Roll- Garbutt, who was accepted everybody, 23 lated a list of ily nuts," recounts the year long accomplish- Stones local and of like being ing at pubs tav- her into the music of the melting pot gossip, old Music Education major ex- ments during four year jog at programs this is in small town," said Garbutt erns; however, strictly for University of Western Ontario a plaining how she and her broth- Laurier. fun.

ers would mimic the characters As a career, Garbutt wants to of the musical comedy that aired make a serious stab at the rock 'n in the early seventies. roll music industry writing songs "We have photographs of us and performing for large audi- at home standing on the couch. ences. My mom's got an eight track of I've "All my life been cop- the Partridge Family playing in ping out to teaching, thinking that there the hi-fi and were standing teaching is the only way to go, with ice-cream scoops singing on but 1 love performing, I love the the couch," she said. limelight, I want to be famous by Garbutt. who's major instru- the time I'm thirty-five," she said. ment of study is the trombone, "You need to have a goal, took her very first music lesson and just within this past year I've and hooked on the piano, was on realized have you to set a goal music from then on. can't and you think that it's dumb. "When 1 was young it was a You have got to believe you can fad to take piano lessons because do it before can actually it...1 you go all my friends were doing after it," added Garbutt. liked it a lot, my parents never "... and the first step is had Garbutt seeing to tell me to practice," P' Skalkos yourself there." said. Trombonist Dianne Garbutt c; Chris

| WLU BOOKSTORE i T ri ns SOFTWARE BW SI M N a"l atte„d

;ST 'IS U U WAREHOUSE the launch of

COME ON UP TO OUR VERY FIRST !/ TERRY COPP'S

I I Specials Games ) k|'C j Gravis" Game^7TT"Ts27^4^BfjS|aE^E^Cit}-2000".557.00 ) A I A |\l AI 11 A |\| \ ) Rebel Assault $69.00 UltrasoundslB9.oo \ 7"\ LHI IflL/I 11 J 1 II Vf II 11 IV IIT\" i J 1 Shadows Of )

Darkness %57M 1 EVER WONDER how good that i 111 f\ T t/\ tmp / software is out of the package? a* |||||l|T/|TL|r )

find out with in-home trial ill NOWyou can our new \ 111 In program. f| J 111 J Come in & ask me about the details, or call me from,hat I vJwl 1/ L / We have about 60 titles of game ' comfortable chair! - GARY \ . \ & software new 1 __ appucation __ J

andp«™vved,at D ATTI Iflll HC (]f ) II I II 1 \J I regular [jlil | | | J /

~~ LOW PRICES! j)

CTMIS ALL PRICES ON THIS I IM Al"■ a / M I A A k IIS \I I ii NUKMAN JY

( ' MON TUE | WED "TOJ SpfETttS SAT SUN with he f,a* I„a« 1,3* .Coinciding J 50th Anmversar D Da m m f® IS" PI Pi $&* y °f y l=p| 111! km tail |Sf| ills Ills Thursday, March 24, 1994 2:30 \t& \*4 mi mi mi } p-m-

"

- - Liz —l—z. L_f —ii Faculty Lounge, CTB )'

—— ~ - - Sale In March sth March 27th, 1994 ~" Quantities Limited Effect » " _ i_ THE CORD ENTERTAINMENT Thursday, March 24, 1994 23

I power comes great responsibility. was given a great gift, and I must learn to use it wisely. That Spirit Of The West little advice, and the fact that I was taking six

ensured that I did become courses, not a concert

wildman. left that writers. After VIEW FROM going I to my Returns ToRoots

FARMTHE wading through all of their stories, it felt like I was

GREG SLOAN had the in there. I even ringing my ears. Oh, my

Entertainment Editor the mistake, that was just Lynn, production man-

Here it is folks. The last View From The Farm. in TONY CHARTRAND- them outofthe folk clubs ager, telling me to get my but gear. brought This is the last "real" Cord of the BURKE and into small still year (watch for It took me until early December before I theatres, they weeks Cord next special Retrospective and it I needed Entertainment to deliver an incredible issue), finally got a key for my office. I realized manage

will soon be time for to show with me the one when came to visit in Novem- fans of Canadian celtic- healthy doses of musi- put away gloves my parents up Early retire and as Entertainment Editor. ber. I took them by the Cord offices to show them rockers Spirit of the West would cianship and humour. In the spirit

I hope you can still see the text the that had and that have been ecstatic to be in at- of St. drummer through I my own mailbox, my name was Paddy's Day, wall that of tears must be welling in office door. I found that these are tendance for their Vince Ditrich and multi-instru- up your eyes. even on my Friday night know how I feel. I havn't been this choked the It 1 1:00 St. show at mentalist McMillan took you up true legitimizers of anyjob. was am on special Paddy's Day Hugh since the last of The Wonder Years. After the episode a Saturday morning, and there was nobody around. Fed Hall. two recent al- over stage to perform "Danny in case, I don't hear this disembodied bums which the band and of Except my The door was locked, and since my locksmithing saw adding Boy" a medley cheesy

voice from the future the drummer and to And the narrating zany, yet skills aren't that hot, we couldn't get in. So my a electric guitars Irish songs. audience just

value events of life. it always teaching, my parents got to look at the office through the tiny explore harder-edged material, ate up.

To commemorate the of this occa- band decided this It seemed that, after solemnity crack in the main office door that we affection- the was an event strange

I will know look back at sion, my reign as your ately call a window. that would be better suited for spending the bettter part of the Editor. Entertainment Start the film the best about to the the made four them- rolling. I found thing having a key dusting off songs that past years distancing

It all last March, when I received the is them Canada's their began offices, however, that it gives you a place to premier folk selves from folk roots, one call that I of phone informing me the are of Canada's vital bands got job check your coat when you going to the Turret. group. most Assistant Entertainment Editor. The before with for would much of their night I put that fifty cents I saved every time I went into Beginning "D De- jetison so and me a couple of buddies had decided that on for vehicle. Let's of the few recent work to backtrack as a special jar, trying to save up a mocracy", one they home from the The Turret we would out I saved about 3 bucks. Do know "eclectric" of the did. way try see. you anybody songs the night, the new Olympic Sport of snowbank Too their band off into the usual sual three from last diving. wanting to sell Ranchero? tore Only songs

bad we didn't decide to do this when there was At the end of the first For Rest" "And If semester some people show-clOsers "Home a year's Faithlift, Venice

some left, and not the rock that Sadness Grows" actually snow hard, felt the Entertainment section needed a per- and"The Old Sod". It was clear is Sinking", and, remains of the stuff that into. we were jumping manent column, written by myself, that would early in the night that this would almost apologetically, "Five Free woke the I next day, with a serve there week. Little be it up finding myself as an anchor, being every a particularly extraordinary Minutes", made into Friday

minor concussion. Either bad did know what themselves the that, or a really they they were getting concert. night's set. Perhaps Spirit of

when the I did not hangover. Anyway, phone rang into. January saw the first View From The Farm Pulling songs out of their West have reconciled their past think there for was humanly possible me as any way hit the newsstands. catalogue as far back 1984's with their new direction but, if a make it down the stairs it. "Tell them to to answer Now here I am, writing what could be the last. "Doin' Quite Alright", Spirit of band feels that it has the talent

I'm not home," I shouted to roommate. my Well, The fate of the column is up in the air. Now, lets the West played fast and loose. and the drive to continue record-

it was the so I of bed Cord, dragged myself out (it say a massive letter writing campaign was started, Vocalist John Mann had to stop ing after ten years of working

was and to the the View From The the then be early afternoon), limped phone. asking for continuation of midway through Tripping Up together, they should pre-

"Thanks a lot" was about all I could manage. Farm, how could next year's Entertainment Edi- Stairs' "An Honest Gamble" af- pared to showcase that material

I the and made a mad dash for hung up receiver, tor resist? Not that I would condone anything like ter forgetting the words to one of in concert.

the washroom. As I choked the remains of that. would the the up That be blowing my own horn, and we verses. Regardless, capacity

what had been 7-1 1 nachos with extra chili and humble folks do that. The has crowd were thrilled to dance country don't things like band certainly grown

I realized that bank have from three- with the old and reels. cheese, maybe snow diving So, a great summer. I hope you enjoyed the days of being a along jigs

wasn't such idea. — with After hours and a great the Entertainment Section this year. If you ever piece celtic nostalgia act two two encores,

Needless to it could from band left the with their say, only go up see a great concert, or listen to an awesome new Mann, flutist Geoffrey Kelly and the stage

there. And it did. The came in write of it. We free stuff Knutson "The biggest speed bump C.D., a review even get departed guitarist Jay staple drinking song when I Entertainment Those who October, to like and tickets here. All — to five member alternative Crawl". to see was promoted C.D.'s concert up you a came Editor because of unforseen It events. was a rocky have to do is write a review of them, and they're folk-rock group with hit singles Spirit of the West Friday night

transition for the first of but I Just and and a rare I couple weeks, soon yours to keep. come up bug next years videos. enjoyed treat, only hope

the it. vacation. the West have al- if the chance to caught hang of regime. Me, I'm about to start my Where Spirit of that, comes along

I discovered I could into in the it for been best-known for the them mate- get any concert did I put that sunscreen. Oh yeah, I used ways see perform newer

K-W area for free. Wow. Then I remembered, of their live shows. De- rial, that will be will- liquid paper back in January. And that's the View energy they equally from old that with in the show. my Spiderman comics, great From The Farm for this year. spite the popularity that has ing to take

Thank you to :n-~'

<* <* night

# HOMEMADE rrs* JAM BAND Z:™ A read these DM A. 9

I hallowed I TO

na CLOSE S*;

NO COVER WITH Ws Entertainment STUDENT [_ ID. [ 24 ENTERTAINMENT THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 Sound And The Furies

to with their GREG SLOAN The the and "rock's dar- this time Eddie taught a get across music is Fureys are coming to accoustic guitar During Cord Entertainment named Dave Stewart for the crowd to simply have Centre in the Square March 25. ing spirit". Their show consists young man a Stewart time. Eddie the Shimerin Shamrocks. If with how to the good encourages Holy you The Fureys have recorded 47 of foot tapping Celtic songs play guitar.

success with audience not to just sit there, but survive the whole St. Patrick's albums their of later went on to find over long and storied a strong dash humour.

to in on the fun. and don't The an the join day experience, you career. band consists of four Recently I had opportu- Eurythmics. wait The brothers with The band will be want to an entire year for brothers, Finbar, Eddie, George nity to speak toEddy Furey about joined up performing

1972 a mix of old favourites and another slice of the Emerld Isle, and Paul. They perform tradi- performing, touring and the city guitarist Davey Arthur in to new don't fret. The and material. Eddie thinks their Irish music legends, tional music updated with of New Orleans. He told me the form Fureys Davey ap- in the fact Arther. Since then The Fureys peal lies that they can band got started by playing mu-

the world. a bit of "home" to sic around the house with his have toured all over bring anyone

the in Aus- who fells a little bit Irish. Celtic Drunkness At aunts and uncles. His cousins Eddie said band was just It and they doesn't matter if you've been were in the circus, so show busi- tralia before Chrismas, the Their now the U.S. and from homeland for 60 ness was in their blood. are touring away

days or 60 Phils With The Mahones first big break came when they Canada. years. Eddie what them Eddie he likes Canadian were about 14 or 15, and were says keeps says

audiences. The band audiences because are a music festival. is the they DAVID POPOVICH They also have live dates on playing at big going easy like all the travelling, but and laid back, Cord They won the main event, and doesn't going something Entertainment CFNY 102.1 and City TV on natural for them to like themselves. He that March 23rd. The Mahones from that moment their careers it's just keep says Last Wednesday that fantastic bar are a very seldom do find a cold remarkable took off. touring because that is what they they audi- across the road and down the truly group who have

with his He doesn't ence here. deal of talent. If Eddie teamed are used to doing. stairs hosted an incredible Pre- a great you're up for the interested in brother Finbar and em- think they will ever burn out like Opening up Fureys is St. Patrick's Day Bash with the an amazing Irish younger Canada's own musical sound should take the barked on a tour of folk clubs in some bands do. comedy most fitting melodies of the you oppor-

and The they are act Jimmy Flynn. to see these live. Ireland, England Germany. messsage trying Mahones. Thanks to these gen- tunity guys

tlemen, Phil's home (my away

from home away from home)

once again provided an unbeliev-

able night of singing, dancing

and drinking. This phenenomial •V— A"--* A %

band played to the largest crowd " *" ***&& -y-,,, w"'-ww *" V- *vx™ • --•>*» --v , -•'"■

I've SfsSjVlV/. ever seen on a *-. -. .- Wednesday ,,, "' '"' '"" —'■ ' "••■■••••• • '4SSSSSSS^S^^S^^

112 v**tt.+ «-• -X«S«< night. TBMWtlJffli^'nfjf^ii'

Asijt Their blend of Irish music ■A

accented by some contempory

rockin' tunes had the audience

second enjoying every of this

groups incredible musical abili-

ties. You couldn't help but dance

to the sounds of these merry jo- ...... gaj)^| _

vial minstrels. With an authentic

Irish harmony the band played

through until the wee hours of ' ' '■■■■'■*!*■

V&V" the Waterloo morning. It was like • :^y,^.:^^^y.;.^v.^y

■- •■•■»«. Irish New Year's Eve wffrMWWSSW^W an as they

counted down the minutes to the ■ SsiSS^^ stroke of midnight ushering in St. Patrick's Day. Originally from Kingston,

these guys have done touring

throughtout the U.S. and Canada.

Lead singer Fintan McConnell.

informed me that the band just

hit the front of page Kingston's local paper. This is quite the hon-

our, since they're the only band, other than the Tragically Hip, who

have ever reached page one. (By

the way they did go to high school

with the for Hipsters any inter-

ested T.H. fans). Their tour con-

tinues until break bit they for a of

a vacation in August. After playing Phil's the band

had to return to Kingston on St.

Patrick's for two Day gigs pro-

the official release of their Some ofthis moting country's the CD, Draggin' Days, pro- duced under the Kenetic/Dennon most creative minds are in Canada's label. Could there be a more ap- propriate date? They have two insurance previous releases; however this industry.

be their first seems to major pro- the kinds of minds that know They're creativity educated, experienced and ethical of duction. This twelve track CD group far literature goes beyond art, or movies. making professionals equipped to pursue successful contains nine original songs. If like consider re that, why not a career with careers at the you local, provincial, national or even Most of the band's writing is done Canada's property/casualty, or general insurance international level. Fintan and the results by are just The offers wide industry? industry a variety of Choice, challenge, satisfaction and fantastic. security. career choices for creative minds. Accountants They are just some of the rewards you'll enjoy The music was spectacular but also yes, systems analysts, a creative lawyers, managers, through career in the the property/casualty as the captures true group loss prevention engineers, investment specialists, insurance industry. essence of the Irish sentiment. marine aviation investigators, underwriters, For more information, look for your local and The choice adjusters many more. is yours. Insurance Institute in the white pages or, contact General insurance is also an that Les industry Dandridge, 8.A., A.1.1.C., at The Insurance Kead Entertainment to its levels of encourages you acquire own Institute of Canada, 18 King Street East,

professionalism. As a Fellow or Associate of The or we will tear your 6th Floor, Toronto, Ontario, MSC IC4 Insurance Institute of would Canada, you join an (416) 362-8586 FAX (416) 362-1126. soul apart

Canada's Insurance Spread Evif Professionals The Graduates of The Insurance Institute of Canada THE CORD ENTERTAINMENT Thursday, March 24, 1994 25

The result of this 19th thanks to Dr. well of fel- centuries. Unlike the Americans cen- Special goes I, as as some my

sim- was that Barry Gough of the de- low Cordies, kind of chuckled (who had developed the gun tury military thinking history of thousands of who lent this book when I read the title of this book. ply for practical reasons because tens men were partment me

of the hundreds of thousands of slaughtered in useless infantry to review. Actually, some looked at me with

and which were as how this is the last men involved in the Civil War, cavalry charges Seeing WAR a strange but worried expression, and becauseof the advancements always stopped by small squads revei w for "War Story" this year, STORY an expression that said "Yikers, JAYSON machine I felt it thank the "RAMBO" Rambo has the the U.S. was in industrial of German gun crews. necessary to finally goneover making GEROUX the British did not people who contributed to edge." "The social history of the technology at the time), British Unfortunately, many

Cord Entertainment realize this until after three this column's success: machine gun?" I asked Dr. Barry military leaders hated the fact years of and thousands To Scott first I have been reluctant to that their best could be fighting tens of McKay (the profile Gough of our history department, troops books and down machine. of deaths had occurred. The les- entertainment editor) and on weapons firearms who had lent me the book. "Ac- brought by a mere

in this column son learned was that 19th Sheldon Page (the EIC), who for two reasons. tually," Dr. Gough replied, "it's To these romantic military lead- century gave the for First, while the diehard readers military thinking could not com- me go-ahead this column quite a fascinating study of the of this column (are there machine pete with 20th century warfare, waaaaaaay back in October. actually gun and its develop-

out where the of and To Eric Green, who any there?) would not mind ment." weapons war, designed the the "War it, a of not the men, were now mas- nifty Story" graphic that majority Laurier's stu- Guess what? He was right.

ters of the battlefield. It is a week that dents probably would not be able The book is quite fascinating for appeared every so you,

relate to it. its the statement that the reader, could to Second, to profile history on development of certainly applies instantly recog- this nize this column. Thanks abook on would becon- the to day. for weapons weapon, and it is a pretty very

sidered me as After the war the machine the time to do it, Eric. (by anyway) glori- quick read (took me a couple of taking

and in To Professor and fying war, romanticizing war hours). It is not, as the author gun grew popularity, especially Terry Copp for American in the Dr. is not what this column is about. writes, a book which describes gangsters Barry Gough who lent me a

I do feel that it is 1920's and 1930'5, and of books review for this However, "rates of fire, or muzzle veloci- through couple to

for historians its in the movies of column. Both have been incred- necessary military ties, blow-back actions or appearance

the of for the 1950's and all dis- influential in of to study weapons war, number-two stoppages" (techni- 1960'5, ibly my study

it is the weapons that play a fac- cal military jargon). It is, how- cussed in a short chapter which, military history in my years here

in the fates of the the author notes, showed the at Laurier. tor deciding ever, an interesting read on the soldiers who the bat- Americans To use them, weapon's early development and growing tendency for Kathryn Wardropper of tles that in in vio- who are fought, and some- its effect in the campaigns in particular to engage our Laurier bookstore, was

times even the wars themselves. Africa and the First World War. lence, whether real or make-be- always so nice, understanding,

The lieve. The last is and and who al- machine gun is one such The strength of the book lies in chapter an ex- helpful smiling

Its in modern the the cellent of the book as a lent me books review. weapon. use day discussion of why ma- summary ways to

warfare is of the chine whole. Thanks Ms. just one many gun was not accepted by Wardropper!!! Even the tools that militaries use in their in the ers who still believed in the though machinegun To Greg Sloan (the current many European (in par- power vast arsenals. Its development ticular the British) military hier- of the cavalry and the individual has declined in importance as the entertainment editor) and Paul

has an factor in and the "man was the mas- defining of war (it has McLean who with a lot of played important archy, consequences of infantryman, weapon put up

that ter of the and the been with the thermo- bullshit this col- this century's conflicts, espe- ignorance. battlefield," not replaced my concerning

the First World War of Even British nuclear missile, no doubt), this umn over the few months. cially (1914- At first, course, the ma- weapons. though past

book still to 1918). Thus, the reason I officials had seen the a And, finally, Lynn why chine gun was rudimentary in its military provides fascinating

decided the book effects the machine social of the the man- to review you design because the technology devastating history weapon McCuaig, production

here. had which, even it had a dev- of the Cord, who with see pictured As quoted by was not yet available to develop gun played against the peo- though ager put up

in Africa of effect in the First World even more of bullshit when it this book's author, "Guns, like it to its full capacity. After the ples (a chapter the astating my

book is dedicated to has become a of came to this column. Thanks for everything else, have their social American Civil War, when an solely these War, weapon

too. continued their use to the militaries of so history," effective machine gun was pro- campaigns), they everyday being understanding, Lynn.

of the romantic ideals the An read for And thanks to The Social History Ma- duced, it was still not accepted of use of cav- today. interesting goes anyone both buffs and who I have missed. God. 1 chine Gun, by John Ellis by the "romantic" military lead- alry and infantry right into the weapons military may First World War. historians. loved doing it. 186 pages, $16.00 ers of the late 19th and early 20th

Thanks # I I lIVIIII>vi

156 : King St. N. ;«*"» %I#*V

• I Waterloo 7Z5-WZ\ 4 Jf\ - ft 1|

"* ■ I jj|C-■ i 5 I for the work they did on j x £ I IQAA /

IwVf • * March 26 ENTERTAINMENT THE CORD Thursday, 24, 1994

Dear Primate Pete, Bite BarkWorseThan Dynamic Laurier for Well, you can't really blame a girl find be- not of the solution, having class. Do you yourself shaving you're part ANDREW COMBE knuckles off the re of the problem. These Duo tween the eyebrows? Get your you' part Entertainment like the Cord characters combine to ground. Hey Cro-Magnon, stop acting two make by Ventura and Melanie Seal of a Tanya be Reality Bites is the story for soulmate missing link. Your animal-like sex may good, Ryder's options very how she finale like Evolve into the college graduate and dichotomous. "What is Dynamic Duo, but who wants a that? your prob- Check into to the "real" modern man, homo erectus. yourself adjusts world. Wow! lem?", StillerasksHawke'schar- My girlfriend is very self conscious about her for a film. like This, What a premise "I'm cuckoo for CoCo has become the metro zoo and find a mate more you! great acter. body and to begin sex, it a forced with facial Winona Ryder (Heath- Hawke's character of is if don't mind a woman Starring Puffs", re- ritual that she steers me into port without letting course, you Dracula), Ethan Hawke hair. ers, plies. As you can imagine, by the me look down, or even hold the wheel, if you Poets White Fang) Dear Goddesses of Sex, (Dead Society, end of the film Stiller's character know what I mean. I am never sure what tunnel this film so! Tell and Ben Stiller (Stella) 1 Can it be true? Please it ain't me, is quite frustrated. have actually driven into. There aren't even any say it has lots for it or so has contributed to going , Another that takes street I she the gentleman that so faithfully thing signs. think may be getting me to away What I I'm trying is the column, that aren't giving up your sexu- appears. guess from the film dialogue. I perform anal sex without my knowledge. How your you movie is that to is that this not like the I 1 alter egos. You can't give it up now, say felt characters were con- can tell where am, so to speak, without accus- ally superior mannered lives of for several reasons. like of to return to the boring, mild great tinually talking they were ing her anything falsely. I always use a con- The movie continues to un- she be but Ventura" and "Melanie Seal" where you making soliloquies stating their dom and refuses to anywhere on top so "Tanya Hol- in need. What about dermine itself by putting a can no longer help those life's hopes and fears while the I can't see anyway to tell. Help me! the of tinge on normal life, those souls whoejaculate at mere sight lywood were talking to would Signed, I can 7 see a damn thing down there poor person they

that matter? What which never works. The other animal for just wait for their turn. Dear I can't see a damn thing down there, a girl, or some quietly own of the movie to be of those whose boyfriends demand things of moral appears don't talk but Night goggles are one option. But let's get girls They realistically, will fail if it them that could how to that a relationship only you two explain rather like they were on a T.V. serious, your ship will slide a lot easier into one that certain perform? These people would be lost without doesn't have "je ne sitcom in which tracks port than another. Take a whiff, you'll know laugh

turn...darkness on all sides. I fear ce pas". would their where you've been. You'll either have the scent anywhere to augment comments. the charac- however, that this letter will not yoOr In film, Ryder's One about the film of sweet loving, or just plain excrement. change good thing m Twill Your ter Lelaina must choose between Dear Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson, minds so come to my present problem. is the soundtrack which helps pick strait-laced business executive decision to abandon the students of Laurier in this a slack moments when My problem is truly an unusual one and has up some the and also named Michael, and a T.V. I has left me awestruck, quite limp to isn't the left me completely stupefied. Every friend have way dialogue generating under-achiever named be frank. Not even the harmonious notes of the watching had here Laurier has broken me emotional wallop that it should. at up with quite Hawke the couch national anthem could a rise out of this Troy. plays abruptly. This has taken place right after the first get puppy Overall the screenplay is weak the time like Brad Pitt's char- in I now! So for what is probably last ever, potato (just and the result is characters who sexual encounter each case. am pretty sure acter from True Romance) who is please end present misery with your keen and aren't well and there- that it isn't my performance that truly disap- my developed sexual out T.V. commercial slo- I that sharp wisdom. spits fore don't care pointing to them. However, admit my you particularly Bur in lieu of re- Signed, Down, not Out intelligent not. finishing moves in the "mixed-pairs belly-slap- gans if they find happiness or about is unusual. the Dear Down But Not Out, sponses when questioned I ping" dance rather Upon reaching wasn't surprised by one of what he intends do his Do not fear. We shall be here next to with crucial, and most explosive stage of the act, I sit again year. the "plot twists" in the film and would de- Ben Stiller also di- You think give us a life. (who up, arch my back, furrow my brow, and beat my seriously anyone neither will you be. At one point gree? We'll be writing the Dynamic Duo until the rected the film) plays the mature, chest with my palms while roaring like a gorilla. Hawke's character remarks, end of time...or until The Toronto Sun sensitive quasi-yuppie who com- 1 have no control this reaction and doctor syndicates "This isn't the Bunch over my Brady you See in the love that its innate reaction us. September, same bat paper, same pletes triangle. don't says just an to orgasm. My you know! Problems get solved

and bat column, but never the same bat sex question. He's the logical person who girlfriends find it "insulting" "childish" and in 30 minutes!" He was right in how to "Dynamic" often means loud or vocal in bed. has brief insights into sur- that Now cease to accept my calls. regard. they get solved Think about it... vive in the modern world, but Signed, Primate Pete in 100 minutes. I give it six out of who ultimately believes that if ten stars.

KW's Finest Exotic Entertainment

1 lit#-" 111. For Ladies One Night of Madness

TUESDAY, M«H#9th

I Tickets $5 in advance • $6 at the door

'

j» Hot, Hard Bodied Men

W T HE C E ■RRRH -————''-Free Pool

liHßip llMA) - SATURDAY

' :

, Tournament

at 2:00

jUik. jt I JBQ U.jll■j|H i I' Ii 11'i I 111 : I1 I I

Your First Choice for Live Stand-Up Comedy

nSBiTOPBWrBI WATEKLOO'S mn »»m« I\IEIH?WPK CAMPUS COURT "7V* ■■ V^iyll

597 I King Street Northj|,Waterloo o 746-5209 COMMENT THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 27

volume XXXIV the Cord issues 1-27 Who are you?

"The tie that binds Laurier" since 1926 So I'm in middle of and the other can't believe he's the a conversation person says"I John, always talking behind other people's backs. Who does he think he is?" A Wilfrid Laurier University Student Publication I hate hypocrites. 75 University Ave. West, Waterloo, Ont. N2L 3C5 And I hate people who can talk about nothing other than sports, and who spend absolutely all of their

884-2990 — (519) Fax: (519) 884-5596 than section. Or free time watching sports, and who never see any of the newspaper other the sports Advertising: (519) 884-5092 someone who can talk about nothing other than her boyfriend, and the cute things he does, and the deep

things he says, and "We're so in love. Really. I mean it. Don't you believe me?" EDITORIAL BOARD Try some variety; maybe you'll get interesting. EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Sheldon Page Then there's the people with dare-devil attitudes, who are soooo cool because they skydive or break NEWS EDITOR Kathleen Honey the limit do with scissors rebel their Whatever to speed or drugs or run or against parents. happened ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR Steve Doak productive hobbies, or the value of a good book? ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Sloan Greg Drunk Not who but who can't control people really get on my nerves. people drink, people ASSISTANT ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Scott McCormick themselves when they drink. Then again, what's the value of being able to talk coherently if you've got SPORTS EDITOR Jennifer O'Connell first nothing intelligent to say in the place, or you're not really that interesting tobe around. And drinking ASSISTANT SPORTS EDITOR Eda Di Liso . in is a really great way to escape those problems your life that you don't have the guts to face. PRODUCTION MANAGER Lynn McCuaig Has it always been this hard to find a good conversation, or have we been corrupted by comic books FEATURES EDITOR Ingrid Nielsen and television. It seems like some people have nothing more in their lives than to drink and do silly STAFF REPRESENTATIVE Sean Wilde tell stories and hear things, and then to their drinking over over again for years. It's like a joke that you

and with minimal variations best. The entertainment value is over over again, at soon gone. STAFF We pay thousands of dollars a year to attend this institution, and then many people go out of their Production Assistants: find the and to do the least work their These way to easy courses necessary to get degree. people are a Andrew Cameron waste of education. Paul M°Lean if weren't and weren't comfortable with Maybe you spoon-fed by mommy daddy or you so your Classified Co-ordinator Amanda Dowling the of social assistance be psychological dependency on guarantees you'd more willing to pull your own Circulation and Filing John Huculiak weight. Copy Editors: And I hate revolving doors; they're so condescending. Emma Dwyer What about who criticize this habit people can everything? Is supposed to be valuable? I though the Sandra Gabriele of nihilism Buddhism into point and was to progress a state where you could actually create something CONTRIBUTORS new. Sure it's easier to attack weaknesses to contrast any strengths you might have, but most critics don't Janine White, Amal Moussaoui, John Huciliak, Virginia Parker, to have to be contrasted. seem any strength AndrewHopper, Jelena Mihajlovic, Selene MacLeod, Mark Heasley, It's even worse when people criticize something because it is familiar, and not because it is Jayson "Rambo" Geroux, Tony Chartrand-Burke, David Popovich, Just because character such doesn't mean that it's imperfect. you can put a name on some trait, as zeal, Andrew Combe, Tanya Ventura, Melanie Seal, Anne Ferguson, bad there's necessarily bad. Unless, of course, you're afraid of looking yourself because no consistency Tanya King, Christopher Skalkos, Shawn Callan, Selene MacLeod,

in own Pete Robinson, Scott Stinson, Jason Gllmore, Nick Schlochta, Rob your personality. Then who know who and what know the Humes, Jim Boyce, Lisa James, Mark Heasley. there's people they are they believe. They way things ought

to be and they won't listen to anything to the contrary. They praise or condemn specific situations based

these realise be and that there are inevitable limits upon general beliefs. They don't they might wrong, Production: Chuck Fairley, Ryan Feeley, Jayson "Rambo" Geroux. to the applicability of their beliefs. Photo: Skalkos, Selene MacLeod, Parker, Christopher Virginia It's nice be in the niche carved for but that doesn't should to confident you've out yourself, mean you Jayson"Rambo" Geroux, Scott McKay. close if be better weaken. For yourself to everything else, even it might for you to example, many people Cover Scott photo: McKay. their but then go through the first couple of years of university determined about program, start to Arts Section Coordinator: Sean Wilde question if it's really right for them.Many of these continuedoing what they're doing until they graduate fpr ..gwfty... with a degree that has absolutely no value to them, just because they were afraid of looking at any STUDENT PUBLICATIONS alternatives, anything less safe than the path they're paved out. TREASURER Jennifer Martin I don't think I have and I doubt that I will. It would be met any perfect people, ever easy to PHOTO MANAGER Debbie Duiker define unlike the characterize everyone by their faults. After all, it's these imperfections that people, Photo Technicians Keli Watson inconceivable, undefinable infinite of human potential. 4~Kevin Dickinson I guess I'm just another hypocrite in a world with too many people. Graphic Arts Technician ..Anton Volcansek Art Director Tina Romano Editorial by Steve Doak, Associate News Editor

The opinions expressed in this editorial are those of the authorand do not necessarily reflect those of the ADVERTISING rest of the Cord Staff, or of its publisher, WLU Student Publications. Manager Mark Hand FROM Ad Production Manager Paula Kalijarvi PHOTO THE EDITOR

Ad Production Assistants Dawna Maclvor

David Janzen

Sales Jeff Nugent

Sean Mateer

Allan Paweiek

BOARD OF DIRECTORS

Adrienne Hodgin, President

Heather Mundell Sue Barry

Chris Bradley Phill Kinzinger

JeffOegema Michael Rosenblatt

Sean Taylor (ex officio)

The lasi real issue - thank God! Ai least our computer system works great 1

the be submitted (or submitted All Letters to Editor must signed, typed on disk or

via E-mail) and double spaced by May sometime, ai 12:00 pm for the following

publication. (A message to whomever stole my roomates' bikes - fuck you!) But,

we can only print letters that bear the author's real name, telephone number, and

I.D. number (if applicable). Please see the letters policy on the next page for all the

details. All letters must be no longer than 500 words. All submissions become (he

of The Cord the to edit or refuse submissions. property and we reserve right any

The Cord will not print anything in the body ofthe paper considered to be sexist,

racist, homophobic in nature by the staff as a voting body, or which is in violation

It vile will the of our code ofethics. is possible that some really letters show up in

- Cord letters section, since it is an open forum. I can sleep at night can you?

for addresses within Canada and $1Z outside subscription rates are $ 15.00per term

the country. The Cord is printed by well inked people of McLaren Press.

The Cord publishes each Thursday and damn we are proud of it . The Cord

of Canadian All is is a full member University Press. commentary strictly the

opinion of the writerand does not necessarily represent those ofthe Cord staff, the

editorial board, the WLU Student PublicationsBoard ofDirectors, or those people

who want Scott McCormick to resign. Copyright (c) 1994 by WLU Student

Publications, 75 University Ave. West, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3C5. No part of

this publication may be reproduced without permission of the Editor-in-Chief.

Damn staight. A farewell to a friend. March 28 COMMENT THE CORD Thursday, 24, 1994

dent has little clout when with moder- body dealing other column, enGENDERed species, school administration and faculty in school ates the anti-men and anti-women arguments decision The Student Affairs Com- The Cord's Letters week in The Cord. making. Policy that tend to surface every mittee is an ideal to students columns in The body give a (And is one of the few good - All letters must be and with identificationand signed submitted the author's name,student voice. Further development of this have from stronger Cord). On of all this, you letters telephone number. top new committee will be needed to attain a McCormick, that a more people like Scott present - All letters will be with the author's name. Letters can be without the viable student printed printed the liberal representation. dissenting point of view from author's there is much name only by of the Editor-in-Chief. Presently, concern over ex- permission flourish in The Cord. 1 thought that seems to aminations and the of final - in processing grades. Letters must be received at noon for in that week's issue print, few and by Tuesday publication thought Scott made a good points be Right now an exam can easily identified by on IBM format disk, or via E-mail at: [email protected] the white-male accurately reflected general instructor with the student When I the respective who - letters release correctness. Letters that are submitted on disk or via E-mail must be accompanied by a opinion about political However, to reduce the 'Al- wrote it. degree of form hard first letter, I to or a signed copy that can be obtained at the Cord offices. read that thought myself 1 grading would like to see afraid to take a subjective an there's a who's not - Letters must be double and cannot exceed 500 words. right, guy typed, spaced, examination Scott then "anonymous system" introduced bit of heat.'. Seems I was wrong. - The Cord will be corrected. reserves the right to editany letter. Spelling and not grammar can be found at other Such cam- (this institutions). succumbs to all the bleeding-hearts on - The Cord the letter in whole in that is in violation of reserves right to any or part, would reject a system identify exams by number and writes an pus apology. existing Cord policies. In - not name. instructors and what only by doing so, When will people stand up say

- The Cord is to theeditor. The Cord will black and white or colour would have to on their accepting photos accept the 'Politi- grade papers merit they believe and not worry about The address, number, student number, and alone influence of who photographs. photographer's name, phone eve- barring any actually cally Correct Police' that seem to pop up issue brief description must be printed on the back of the photograph. One photo per will wrote it. The Beth Haydl and rywhere within Cord? be used. these concerns 1 would like to what Beyond see Samuel Morrison have the right to say additional work done towards the has the Laurier they want. Scott McCormick same Corner and student in- who contrib- Speakers' improved when Pat Brethour took right, as does anyone on campus made two ago, years with to various Poor review ironic volvement respect faculty and Not that Pat had utes to the It just seems so over as Editor-in-Chief. ever newspaper. administration activities (ie. when determin- that if it's not pro-feminist or pro-homosexual Dear Editor. anything against anybody, let alone me. of a If there is then it can't be tolerated. ing tenure professor). some- in the over the course of an or pro-environment, I am writing response to the misguided Serializing story that know which needs to be ad- Once letter is or a column written thing you who the Cord entire alienated some a published individual wrote concerning academic year probably Senate feel free dressed by the to give me a call that breaks the liberal train of thought, Bravado '94 (the fashion show). The first and people, confused others, and barely caught the you extension 5566. Bohr the at most. But have people like Marjorie cutting only two correct statements 1 read during the attention of for the 10% of the Nick Hrebicek from 1 writer (Scott Get Out? Get real!) entire letter was "...being the opinionated crowd who stuck it out week to week, up. that said what I I efforts the It's about time people they 5.0.8. that am..." find Mr. Dallaway's hope you felt rewarded for your by I think: 1 I thought and stuck by it. Forthe record, comments offensive and misleading, "...a load "running gags" stuck into the story...and No surprise it's of pelvic thrusts set to music..." I was involved hope you enjoyed it mostly because never WOMEN. the did been done will be 1) Women should be spelled (I in four of fifteen scenes and not once before (and probably never the of the Dear Editor: I Mr. done still can't understand why presence thrust my pelvis at anyone. pity Dallaway again). It not to me that To I'm thankful forall of word MEN in WOMEN is so abhorred by was surprising for not having opened his eyes and seen the sum up, my good is alive and well at Laurier feminists!) the word WOMYN seems homophobia entire performance. Speaking of perform- experiences with The Cord and even some of Spelling March like a futile feminists to (Davis's letter, 17). During four but 1 remember both the bad ones. I hadn't "Me- to me attempt by my ance, yes, it was. Funny, (If quit writing that I have encoun- "BRAVADO I wouldn't have found come with another injustice has been years at Laurier, repeatedly the posters and the tickets saying, tropolis" two years ago, up the men tered The forms have varied back, this I once knew, levied them tyrannical (or homophobia. The High Energy Fashion Performance of "94". my reason to come girl against by that from hate and to should the word All 1 is that MYN?) of the and graffitti promoting violence, Maybe we underline perform- who sent me a letter back then.) can say past present the students and careless comments that such Mr. I contributed to the development of English jokes by by ance next year so people as is, encourage every single person reading has been week that this farewell the faculty. There not a go by Dallaway who do not wish to be entertained to come up to newspaper language. basis of 1 have not witnessed some form of and will attend. offices make 2) should be hired on the bigotry not sometime next year, and start to People

a tasteless comment at own to with no regard to gender, race, ignorance including 1 must thank Mr. Dallaway at this point for your contributions The Cord. If you're qualification,

of effort into this show interested, won't the or other irrelevant factor. WLUSU's training session for campus clubs his recognition the put you regret seizing oppor- religion any 3) who feel the need to executives and jokes by a T.A. during class. by the models, but that still does not excuse his tunity. People complain

ends last about little incorrect state- Most assume others to be comment in the final paragraph, "the Finally, here's one note for my close every politically people straight

if to tell Mark Hand: ment in The Cord elsewhere, ie: That and they weren't they would be able justify the means." The means in this case was friend and editor Scooby-Doo (or Jeop- thatOrenda Davis took such offense by dress, actions or mannerisms. It is this six months of tiring rehearsal followed by a could not be reached for comment. ardy game your that should take a look at the Canadian of the careless week of frenzied activity by the cast and crew Yeah. to) good type ignorance perpetuates and those of '94 Terry Grogan Charter of and Freedoms, and the con- comments bigotry. There are also Bravado just so that Mr. Dallaway Rights

of Freedom of I have the to who declare that don't care about a would have another excuse too air his com- cept Speech. right they per-

Food update what I does son's sexual as as it doesn't plaints concerning the state of modern society. think and speak want, as everyone preference, long Dear Editor: Mr. else of which take of that on them and its not obvious. These Dallaway, wake up and smell the '90's. If (some advantage impact There has been considerable discussion should consider how times don't like what more than others!) If you don't like just many you you see, you are always right people and in The Cord about the meal on-campus what I don't have to listen to it. demonstrate their sexual welcome to go live like a hermit in a cave say, you they blatantly prefer- card rates for next The following is the somewhere. year. And one last thing...the preceding com- ence.

proposed plans subject to the Board of Gover- the Jason George ments are not just opinions of what some In many ways the homophobia at Laurier

nor will approval. of you no doubt term a 'close-minded, is the most difficult to combat because most

In 1994-95 there will be two meal a plans: bigoted homophobic chauvinist paranoid' incidents are perpetrated by individuals who

meal valued at $2,000 with $300 Fisher's light plan (which I am not, in but consider themselves to be and eulogy my opinion anyways), enlightened allowance for off-campus meals and a regular the thoughts and reactions I have compiled accepting of differences. Overall, Wilfrid meal with Dear Editor: plan at $2,300 $600 allowance for for from weeks of listening to other people com- Laurier students, faculty and staff get a D+

Please allow me to take this opportunity off-campus meals. plain about the bullshit they see in The Cord, understanding and enlightenment and I do not

to look back four of with The locations consid- at my years working off-campus being but chicken-shit in individuals were too to write about. foresee any improvement until The Cord. ered are Casey's, Olde English Parlour, Yours in honesty, identify their ignorance and fears and work hard and It's to try sum such an impor- McGinnis Landing, Pizza Pizza, and the new up George Kirk towards improved communication and under- tant period of life in less than 500 words, food services in the Science Building. It is my standing. take shot it but I'm going to a at anticipated that there will be a total of three anyways, Senate Name withheld by request. because leaving The Cord just wouldn't feel off-campus alternatives. platform

right without somehow saying goodbye. The off-campus alternatives may be used

As I look back at my contributions to The after 7:oopm Monday-Friday, and all Sat- day Dear Editor, - not! am I Input Cord, I foremost grateful that was given urday and Sunday. The off-campus alterna- Unfortunately, due to some confusion, the hand" food include opportunity to "try my at so many tives are for only and do not my platform for Senate was not published in Dear Editor, different endeavours: I've been to taxes, or These must be for encouraged liquor, tips. paid at this week's edition of the of The Cord. This "Letter We would like to respond to some write everything from record reviews to seri- the time. to the Editor" is not to whine and complain comments made in Mark Heasley's article alized fiction, with in between at feature In there will be a rollover of stops addition, about the circumstance in but to put forth my about the proposed student services move a the end of the 1994-95 academic articles, weekly column, political interviews, $300 at year, platform. the March 3 issue of the Cord. The move is part and even with $10 administrative fee. comment pieces, sports reports, a As are aware the Senate is of the that of you probably a long range plan sees a doubling (twice) the main editorial: but, before I go any This proposal has been discussed with the body which governs over academic protocol students population and creation of an aca- further, I should note with thanks the many FoodServices Committee, the Inter-Residence and other of academic life here at demic student aspects core area on campus. Many different editors who Council, and the very always supported WLUSU Board. Laurier. Of the many issues which concern the services will be relocated to 202 Regina St. efforts: my Guy Etherington, Tony Burke, CliffBilyea Senate there are several which are cause for The administration has overlooked the stu- Mark Hand, Mike V. Bodegom, and Sheldon some concern. Among the issues that I wish to dents needs and use of these services. Director Services Page. of Ancillary address are Teacher Evaluation Forms, Laurier The plan that has been developed is based More I'd like to thank Guy for precisely, the Student Affairs Com- "Speakers' Corner," on the goal of keeping academics as the central me involved with the in the first getting paper mittee, and the idea of but "anonymous exams" focus on excellent Cord campus. This goal is for me the cover and the 4 disruptive place...Tony giving to few. serv- just name a neglects the daily use that some student whole for and Sorrow in To the Editor: pages "Savagery Most of these issues the important is the for- ices provide. Relocating student awards or Steeltown" in 1991...Mark for me the giving I've been reading the Letters to the Editor mat of the Teacher Evaluation Forms. As business office will have little effect on the cover and 6 whole for (again) pages "Savagery for the few weeks now, as well as some past has done Teacher Evaluation students used everyone (who a as these services are infrequently. 1992 and Sorrow in Fat City" in (plus that of the special columns (ie: Womenwords. Fish, Form) is aware the forms which exist today However, other services like Career Services Mike for whole "Metropolis" thing)... publish- etc.), and I have come to the conclusion that have no for visits capacity specific evaluation of the and the Co-op office require frequent damn word I ever wrote and not ing every The Cord is nothing more than a forum for instructor. Instead, students are presented from the students using these services, A loca- damn of In changing a single one them, shit-disturbers. FISH, have a columnist you with a host of rated subjective questions on a tion closer to the core of our campus seems dammit!...and Sheldon, for me crank helping that is to convert 'Chris- trying everyone to a numerical scale, in is futile. the ad- which, my mind, more logical for these services. Had "Fisher Sheffield's Epilogue" last Septem- tian' lifestyle, because if aren't up you Christian, I an evaluation which would ministration the promote cater to looked more closely at usage four of the Fisher Sheffield ber, to bring years are out on life. In another column, you missing an This will open-ended question. provide of the various services, a more appropriate to a finale. have fervent feminist experience (hopefully) fitting you a who with obviously students the means for a more candid and allocation student serv- of space to the various And now that "Fisher Sheffield's feels that Epi- women (or is that womyn? I better useful evaluation of the instructor. As a result, ices could have been devised. is done? Well, it was hard for check the logue" finally Politically-Correct dictionary!) are the evaluation will better benefit the both the fac- The second major assumption of cur- to kill Fisher off, but I still think that's still me being grossly mistreated in society and and the ulty student body. rent plan is that centralizing the student serv- character better than the the a* that men insensitive chauvinist J in limp off-stage are pigs. An- students feel Secondly, many that the stu- Continued on 29 page THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 COMMENT 29 Conti11ued from page 28 . ices will allow for "one stop shopping". Real­ Then there is Kashtin, Buffy St. Marie, 54-40, istically. students do not require one stop shop­ and Gregory Hoskins and the Stick People, all CORRECTON AND CLARIFICATION ping as most services are not used in combina­ of whom represent our spirit, and represent it The comment article entitled "Gay Bashing is a Deadly Crime" tion. How often have you gone from the pay­ well. which appeared in the January 6, 1994 issue of the Cord contains roll office to the registers office and then to The Oxford S.tudent Union elected its first factual errors. The murder that the article detailed, did not in fact take student awards. Students do not use these serv­ Canadian President this year. In traditional, place. The Metropolitan Toronto Police Force are not ignoring gay ices in this manner. unassuming fashion he is making big changes. bashing incidents in Toronto. In fact, the Metropolitan Toronto This final problem that students should Everywhere in the world, Canadians are consider, is the fact they have once again been accepted because we're known as a trustwor­ Police Force is expending considerable effort in an ongoing effort to excluded from the decision making process. thy, peace loving people. Americans aren't. develop strong contacts and co-operative programs with the gay YP Don Baker has stated that the WLUSU This is because Calixa Lavalee wrote '0 community. The Cord apologizes for any misconceptions that may president took part in the discussions regard­ Canada' as an anthem about loyalty and free­ have been generated from th .~s article. ing the long range plan. However, any major dom. not war. Do we really want an anthem change (such as eliminating all student serv­ like the Star Spangled Banner to give us a ices from the eore of the campus) should have reputation of being war-mongers and proud of mon, rather than divided, solutions. at least attempted to gain some understanding violence? enGENDERed After the Remembrance Day ceremo­ of the students' opinions on this matter. The It pains me to realize that there are so nies at Laurier last year, I attended a entire process has had little publicity. This many people in this country who cannot un­ teach-in on the war in former Yugosla­ derstand what it is to be a Canadian. For those largely eliminated the opportunity for students cJ' species ¥ via. I went to a session called "The to express their concerns to students leaders. cynics who ignored that "cheezy" Canada 125 Gendered Nature of the War" which fo­ let alone university administration. Celebration - you missed one hell of a show If the administration had requested more and an education. If the population would just by JIM BOYCE cused on the rape of women by soldiers. student input into the decision making proc­ make an effort to read some history once in a During the question period, a Laurier ess. a solution would have been reached that while. and to get to know the people down the "I want men to come to the micro­ professor said "I want men to come to the better serves the students' needs. street, we'd be well on our way to an 'identity'. phone and take responsibility for these . microphone and take responsibility for Gerald Knigh, Ed Sluys As for now, I'm sick of people telling me atrocities [rapes of women]." WLU Pro­ these atrocities." This is the type of com­ I do not know how to be a Canadian, and everi fessor ment I find divisive. It manipulates men more sick of ignorance. The current divisiveness between the by playing on their expected role as "pro­ Enviro thanks Megan Ollivier sexes stems from a constant emphasis on tectors," uses guilt to silence them, and Dear Editor. women as victims and men as oppres­ con9emns each individual for the acts of I would like to commend the Students Sick and tired sors. The belief, by many, of a "patriar­ others, It also leads to-inaction and the Union for finally taking a stand on environ­ Dear Editor, chy" that benefits only men and hurts ign{)ring of pressing problems. I attended mental issues by including the Green Plan in I am writing this letter because I am sick­ only women is naive and damaging to the conference to Jearn about what was the upcoming Referendum. This will send a ened by all the shit that has come back ,s.till in everyone. happening in Yugoslavia but left think­ signal to each student when paying their tui­ regards to Scott McCormick's editorial sev­ Consider this ... ing mostly of this professor's unfair and tion that the environment is important to our eral weeks ago. Marjorie Mohr ... SHUT UP!!! When we find that natives commit unproductive attack. I doubt if I was school. During my past four years at Laurier. You have done the exact thing that you accuse suicide four or five times as often as alone in my thoughts. I have often felt that this institution has been Scott of doing. He expressed a point of view. non-natives, we see this as a problem due I wanted to point out to this professor slow to tackle problems such as waste man­ albeit crudely, about an issue that spurs debate agement. This is largely due to lack of legis­ everywhere: political correctness. He later to racism. When we find that men com­ that when discussing the "Gendered Na­ lation and the limited funds the Administra­ apologized because it was not his intention to mit suicide four or five times as often as ture of War," we should also deal with tion has to devote to such work. offend. However, it always takes someone like women, do we see this as evidence of the forcing of men into armies (by pen­ A "Green Fee" would remove some re­ you to read into something and make a cause sexism against men? alty of prison or being shamed by the sponsibility from the Administration and, as out of it. Firstly, he did not say he was anti­ Do we consider it sexism against men and women of their culture) where part of the Students Union. students will have anybody. His point was that if you are not the men that they live an average of seven they are dehumanized and trained to kill. the right to give their input in how the funds best person to do the job, then you shouldn't do fewer years than women, get custody of I realize this professor was arc used. Green Fees have been included in it. It's that simple. He did not say that all children, Jess often, or remain trapped in well-intentioned, but comments like these student fees at Western and Waterloo for sev­ people get jobs because of their ethnicity or the breadwinner role? only serve to increase animosity and cre­ eral years with excellent results. What is also disabilities just as I am sure that, yes. some These questions are not meant to s ug­ ate problems rather than solutions. It is good about Laurier's proposed Green Plan is people are still denied jobs for the very same gest that a "matriarchy" exists (rather this type of divisiveness, of seeing men that the funds will be used for proactive initia­ reasons. tives. such as incorporating environmental You, however, have displayed incredible than a patriarchy) but to show that de­ and women as men and women first and awareness in Frosh Orientation. ignorance and close-mindedness. To deny that scribing the world only in polarized terms humans second, that will have to change At just $.50 per student per term, it will be the pendulum has swayed the other way is to --good and evil, victim and oppressor-­ if we are to find fair solutions to the difficult to accomplish great things in a little deny that there ever was a problem in the first is naive and dangerous. Doing so creates problems facing us all, whether they be time. Still. this is a start and. at such an place. Scott did not say that the treatment of a situation in which stereotypes and ani­ the gendered nature of war or the myriad insignificant cost. Laurier students have little natives by whites was not a bad thing or that mosity thrive and if history has taught us of other issues facing us. reason to vote against the proposed fee in the being disabled was easy thing to live with. In anything, thriving stereotypes and ani­ Referendum. fact. he did not even bring these things up. He mosity are a sign of danger. What our PSI want to thank Allison Potts for Thanks again to the Students Union. merely said that all people were not created society can do instead is recognize that her support this year and for agreeing to Sari Morrison equal. His point was that people were not co-write this column only an hour after equal as individuals, regardless of race and both women and men often feel like vic­ Canadian dammit that people should distinguish themselves by tims (and often are) and to look for com- we first met! Dear Editor, ability. My God, what a novel idea!! To have the past I ordered one. BIG MISTAKE. These working for next year. One such organization I'm shocked by Lynn McCuaigs' "Be someone doing a job because they can?!? Holy shirts are crap; they are see through. the letter­ is the Laurier University Debating Society. Canadian" editorial in the March 17th Cord, Shit!! ing if off centred somewhere under my armpit. During the National Debating Tournament held and am also tired of people telling Canadians Ms. Mohr, I find your comments intellec­ I refuse, like many consumers to pay for crap. this past weekend, Laurier took yet another that they have no true identity. The problem is tually stunted and morally reprehensible. Quo­ Committee members and "leaders" said no grand step. that it is a socialization thing. The more often tas are insulting to the very idea of equality. I refunds. Kim Morouncy. faculty advisor. heard The Debating Society held a tournament Canadians are told that they do not have out­ am sick of the sti ning slander that you attempt my complaint, acknowledged there were nu­ here at Laurier in January of this year, our standing cultural traits, the faster our spirit is to hide under the banner of social justice. It is merous others, but passed the buck indicating second year of existence. This tournament crushed. because of people like you that feed misinfor­ she talked to the dean and others and there was was so successful, that we won the bid to hold McCuaig suggest that we should fabricate mation to the media that causes senseless fric­ really nothing that could be done. the Central Region Championships next fall. a few Saints to "develop [our] own myths. tion between groups of people. Stop stirring up My claim is this; we are the School of A prestigious tournament, the Leger Cup will heroes. and heroines." Unfortunately. myths shit where shit ain't happenin'! Business and Economics. We consistently be run at Laurier the first week of November, and legends arc born from long histories and Brent P. Lanthier reach the students the importance of quality. 1994. We here at the Society are already Canada's (as a country) is not very long. This finding and meeting customer needs. the prac­ enthusiastic about the prospect. If there arc is why we sec people drawing from individual tices of ethical behaviour. and how to solve those of you who wish to give debating a try. heritages something to believe in. Americans Shitty t-shirts problems. Oh, I forgot to mention. they are come on out next year. You will have the have their Pilgrims. we have St. Pat and the going to solve this problem. The ICE execu­ opportunity to try your hand at a few tourna­ Queen. All we arc doing is what every one else Dear Editor. tive told me they are going to hold a pub night ments. then participate in the running of this has done- borrowtng stones. Also overlooked I'm currently tn third year business and at Wilf's doesn't normally charge a cover and event. arc the legends of the Indigenous cultures. If until recently somewhat resented the phrase I certainly won't, like many other,, wear this Along with winning this bid, a member of these are not a part of Canadian culture. Lynn. "bizknob". Those of us in third year have just crappy shirt out to a bar. 1\lice method of fixing our present executive, Ytnce Murton. will be neither is a cold Molson. finished traveltng a hellish journey affection­ the problem. moving up the ranks. He was elected the It is true that many Canadians look for ately called ICE WEEK. it really is a great I've purchased higher quality shirts for position of Treasurer of CUSID for thts com­ cxcu~e to have a good time. but parttes arc but experience focusing on teamwork. A commit­ less money many times and good businesses ing year. CUSID. Canadian University Soct­ a pebble in the mosaic of Canadian diversity. tee was formed by the students to organize and promote quality standards and give refunds or cty for Intercollegiate Debate represent' the Was Canada not voted by the UN as the #I run a semi-formal at week's end to celebrate exchanges to satisfy their customers. The SBE debating socteties of about 40 Universities all country in the world for a number of reasons? our accomplishment. Now the committee had may be teaching up there in the Peters Build­ across Canada. Congrats Vince. and good Granted St. Pats' day ts excessive. but is approximately 42 people on it... 42 ... did I say ing. but a number of students, oddly enough luck. McCuaig not happy that we' re at least express­ 42? Yes 42. Well we needed a finance, secu­ can't learn much. It's a generalization, but Our showing at Nationals was impresst ve. ing ourselves? rity. fundraising. promotion. legal, food and please keep the knob. in Bizknob. because given the new status of our society, and a few McCuaig never does tell us what being a other committees and needed at least that many there are some to whom it applic' unfortunate random round picks. Of course. Canadian is all about. Personally. I believe people right? God only knows how the Charity Luke Morriso11 and Dave Bigioni we have also prepared internally for the next year by voting in our new executive. A thanks ate that the collective diversity of our nation. not Ball and other formal committees successfully rv- our collective bar tab or collection of famous run their formals with only 5 or 6 executives for the executive who have done a magnificent people. makes us great. But, if it comes down on them. I guess they quit their classes. Debating news job this year. and a good luck to those heading ur­ to that, one cannot dispute that we have incred­ T-shirts were also sold by the committee the society for this new year rv- ible international myth-makers of our own. as mementos of ICE week. and I thought it was Dear Editor. The membership of the society must also Anne Murray is brilliant. Gordon Lightfoot is a great idea. They were $12 in advance and It is now approaching year end. and many be given thanks, for their support. We have the King of Canadian music and storytelling. looking at how great ICE t-shirts have been in organizations within the school have been Continued on page 30 March THE CORD Thursday, 24, 1994 30 COMMENT

feminists are lesbians. women who are Continued We all know this is a factor to screen out from page 29 Some lesbians are femi- do Some are not. Scott believes this is unfair, as seen shaky novices release their talents to applicants. WOMENWORDS nists. Some are not. debate and others. visible minori- become solid debaters. Many a good I, many (Including their it is unfortunate that this both in ties who wish to be hired because of Second, has been run, house and at tourna- members of the Women's Centre and not their skin-colour.) by woman is not a good professor (accord- ments. improving the speakers and qualifications

the above facts, there are of her entertaining the audience. Yet still there is Yet, in lieu of ing to your description lectures). editorial. who are by Scott's not something missing. That something is you! people angered However, again this is necessarily a

have labelled him as a racist, chau- The skills that are involved in will They being result of her a feminist. I debating who recently talked direct being A letter to brother One letter my with for the of life. Confi- vinistic and ignorant human being. stay you rest your have had several feminist professors who about "a femi- to me really awful dyke stand and have is that, "he was ignorant enough dence to up your say an expressed [Scott] who weren't his were fantastic and some so nist" he has one of think that all minorities that hired are professor for trait. And there are those of out to get important you there is good. I really don't think any less than white males that do not.' classes. there who already have the talent to take the qualified led kind of correlation. Which comments in the editorial you to world by storm. I wanted to address believe this? Scott knows that there are people A third concern Yes. it takes time. But not as much as you Dear Bro, about smarter than himself, including many I find it was your prof's think. Give a and at the much or another your apprehension may debating try, very For one reason So if that 'fat and watch the rounds of minority or disabled people. about demand for gender-inclusive language least come on out open difficult to talk to men my very also MORE Tournament be oriental homosexual man' who was You consented to the the Debating to who I am close to in all assignments. Legcr Cup feminism, even those the over the less-qualified at Wilfrid Laurier qualified, got job of not "he" to held here University. father, male importance using mean like you, my partner, my my male'...then has been served. Transformed L.U.D.S.. 'white justice by like and women but had a friends. This is not because I do not both men you is should be Jonathan Winter The bottom line that preference with man-on-man of closest friends are changing to human re- men. Some my problem given to the most qualified being, When I basket- find it difficult to talk to played skinny, men. Perhaps I player-on-player. Gone too far gardless if they are black, white, fat, ball in school we were man- or what- feminism is an on-going high taught male, female, homosexual, disabled, men because We I know where to-man defence. were women play- Dear Editor: ever! thing for me. don't exactly

the with other Does this make I have one to has If are on fence regard issue from censor- against women. basically thing say...this you sitting I stand on every single ing

me reassure wasn't it called too far! to opinion of Scott, let you Or it is sense to you? Why gone your ship to prostitution. perhaps McCormick's edito- have such a Over a month Scott that Laurier is lucky to qualified, or ago, I as a woman-to-woman player-to-player? because as soon as identify myself and rial. 'Correct in the Cord and dedicated person to repre- Crap', appeared hard-working I cer- It would not have been that difficult to feminist most men assume possess lot shit. V.P. next Scott to be frank, it raised a of Although sent us as WLUSU year. then I — a of more syllables. tain traits. If I am a feminist must say only couple letters the editor and there have been many to believes in equal rights equal opportuni- be radical, bitchy, a lesbian, totally un- By using gender-inclusive language, you I of ties for So when there is a discrep- supporting Scottcha, am shocked at some everyone. include both In reasonable, and of do just that, genders. in Scott will he did very demanding, the comments made against him. ancy equality, speak-up, as this means and al- thank and com- unshaven. sports encouraging The editorial, (or at least the one I read), in the editorial. We should course I to in and and how it now on a our conversation lowing women compete sports discussed political correctness mend him job well done! Anyway, during I for visible minorities. And for those who still wish to make as- should acknowledging women's competency. means favouritism So tried to argue reasonably why you this words in mouth, I idea. a while male), means or Scott's chance. Now that I think that's such a bad for Scott, (being sumptions put give this professor a don't You facts to read his editorial once discrimination. Certain supporting urge you again. think about what So I can to be as have had some time to only suggest you try FACT: been drawn from Scott's editorial can not be argued: will find that much more has here what I as possible. Further, I said and did not say is really open-minded pay minorities written. Quotas for hiring visible exist. it. than was actually attention to what she is saying and use wanted to tell you. will ask if are a FACT: Job applications you Sincerely, instead of narrow stere- First of all, don'teal I her a dyke. The critical thinking, if have Zora visible minority or you a handicap. Lovric merit of her ideas. the term is and otypes, to judge the If visible way you use negative /'ACT: you arc a minority, or are her, And will will be hired This is the last issue of the Cordbefore It is offensive to to maybe, just maybe, you get disabled, you over an equally derogatory.

will who are out of this course after all. qualified 'white male'. the end of the term that print feminists, and to all women something

once how can it he The next issue of she is a feminist Your Feminist Sister, I ask you again, argued letters to the editor. lesbians. Just because Fondly, Do Lisa James that white males arc at a disadvantage? you Cord will sometime in she is a lesbian. Some the appear does not mean think the 'visible minority or disabled' section May. Thank-you for your support! for fun? 1 think not! appears on an application

Students' Union FEEDback PROGRAM Cord Feedback

A selection of the last week's comments. Plant & Planning QUESTION: How long before a "phone-in" cal

be instituted? squash booking system will does the election council, "Fash- ments in fashion shows, he should QUESTION: I was just wondering if the Author of maybe Why which violations, to the cheesy mall fashion shows. never....we have lost polices poster put up ion Offensive" actually saw the Bravado just go ANSWER: Probably

Adam, if can't take in As material in locations inconsistant show ? Do us all a favour, you one secretary the last year. it is, we can unstamped

and unusual, next with alumni & calls. with the policy? Tim Crowder something original year barely keep up faculty poster

DON'T GO! However, if we had a volunteer to handle the

ANSWER: While the I Thomas calls, we consider it. Phone calls from any group, including Lighten up everyone... have heard enough Stephanie might Election Council (EC), is displaying about "Correct Crap". Scottcha knows that Alumni are not accepted until 9am; students posters

Canadian - what about the that is and Editorial on being can @ 830am. subject The Cord is forexpressing new different sign up throughout campus, group

Canada Tom has a from: Director to the Poster administered views. Rock on! Day? Stompin' great response Rich Newbrough. University Policy

about it! I love the idea of the Dean of Students' Office. All Kevin Rogers song Although Athletics & Recreation by posters

Leaf Day... Beaver Day, though? I don't must be stamped by the Dean's Office before

know. elections, candidates A good issue - Allison Potts' Engendered QUESTION: What exactly are those little being posted. During

Gilmore's Allison PotIs ice? I would are also ot Election Poster Polcy, Species was right on; Jason piece white granules used to melt subject

which further restrictions on the place- on Fundamentalism provided good insight presume it's more environmentally friendly place

else Oust Scott McCormick? That's a bunch of salt. ment and number of This for all Cord columnists (and everyone than campaign posters.

Bull!!! not Council itself. too); and for the most part, the letters were policy does cover the

Jordon I where the less reactionary Ad-hominem attacks, and Bunting ANSWER: The little white granules are re- am not aware of any case

ferred material more logical, balanced arguments. to as ice-melt and are a urea product. Election Council posted unstamped

Students of Laurier... a life! Leave the Poster Lan Torres get They were developed to be more in a location contrary to University

McCormick alone and deal with own your environmetally friendly and are more expen- Policy.

lives sive salt. Hunwicks, Chief Re- Why didn'ttheCordcoverßravado?If Adam than response from: Steve

doesn't like state- Marc Tomlinson Officer Dallaway seeing political response from: Ron Dupuis, Director Physi- turning

Vocal Cord "If you could have anything, what would it be?"

by Mark Heasley and Sheldon Page

love and to that I don't have." "World and Italian "To spread happiness "Everything peace a good "A good career

- lots for Elena Faclaris with the world and paid it." sausage lots of get garlic." Rhonda Forte - Hons. Coffee Services

Parker Lawrence Hammond - 2nd Poll Sci. Virginia year CLASSIFIEDS THE CORD Thursday, March 24, 1994 31

Summer Sublet Call (416) 340-0217 Call 884-0710 ext. 51 10, 5108, 5103 /fe* -

- 4 Bedrooms, 2 Full Baths in New jf v —

A L~r House Five Rooms for Five Women. Near Women's Rugby \ J 1 ! Nomads Club of Toronto Fully Furnished Columbia and Hazel St. Two baths, The Rugby

is for its women's Laundry, Cable, Parking kitchen, parking, laundry. 280 plus seeking players

For 885-2908 side for this summer. more in- Backyard & Patio, MaintenancePro- utilities, per room.

the No- vided - NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO? formation, please contact -IBM COMPATIBLE 466-3061 2 Min. from WLU (James Street) Available Sept. 94 CALL THE STUDENT mads Hot-line at (416) COMPUTER

Price 5 Bedroom House, Lakeshore Area HELPLINE 5250 Negotiable

Call 884-0710 ext. 5510 for more of Waterloo, Large Rooms, Quiet 884-PEER *TWO SOLD* fc: IS (ft kll A I NEW HOURS: *ONLY ONE LEFT!!!* ' Neighbourhood, Garage, Fireplace, }

Close To All Amenities 1 Year Lease Sun - Thurs: - 12am 30 MB Hard Drive 5 1/4" 360 K Bpm

Awsome House For $ 295 / Month 725-9816 Or 888- Mon - Wed: 7pm -1 am Floppy Disk Drive Sale!!! 1 295 Albert St. (North of University 7377 (1) Taking Intersession? 640 K main Memory Ave south of Columbia St.) Call DRUG PROBLEM? We can help. Deferred Exams? 14" Monochrome Monitor - Writing

Rambo at 725-5275. Excellent stu- CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP Call Narcotics Anonymous 651 -1121 Visiting Waterloo? 2 Serial Ports 1 Parallel port Take A Break enl house for four. Well-kept, un- $150/Month (3) Will run word processing and DOS

- This Summer At '•'

Awsome House For 725-5120 ask for Mark Single $19.95 First Choice etc Sale!!! | \jr" | ' $37 '°° room in house MaY- Au gust D° Ub e Will support a variety of printers. 1 0K Super Summer Sublet -nice and clean Daily, Weekly, Monthly Rates including Inkjet and Laser Printers. Large house, large kitchen & living -dishwasher & washer/dryer & mi- Available Very good condition Call x3958 room, parking, utilities included, crowave 884-1970 Call 884-0710 ext 5201

washer/ dryer. Room is above -patio with large private backyard CREAM For Reservations & Info

ground! Large Room! Mustsee! You -two fridges and deep freezer MairContracting hiring treeplanters. IBM Computer

can t et an closer to WLU! 195 *the sublet will on a first come See Career Services for details or J A Tribute To Woodv 80 megabyte drive B y go

Albert St. 1 50.00 basis to non-smokers MANCINI 746-6887 Thanks For This Such An Colour monitor $ Making

Call Scott at 725-1360 Enjoyable Year. 640 K memory HOUSE FOR RENT Student Entrupreneur & General With Love, Very Good Condition Spectacular Summer Sublet University / Lincon. Available Partner Wanted. The Gentlemen Of A 3 West <£450 Sept.

Villiage On The Green Townhouse (Or May), $1 100/Mo., 1 Yr. Lease, — Call 884-0710 ext 5201

month Reduced Rent - ($600) 5 Profitable Small Summer Busi- Alex! Will $125/ May Aug. Very Happy Birthday you

in the for the me? 2 large bedrooms, 2 fridges, BBQ, 2 Bedrooms, Laundry, Garage. 1-763- ness, making, looking marry WLU RINGS FOR SALE Mens & bathrooms, laundry, tennis 1988 (Guelph) right student entrepreneur, who is Ladies Solid 10 K All Sizes Best interested into into Come courts, air conditioning. going partner- to a free Christian Science Prices Guaranteed Custom Class Iccture / discussion with 884-0710 ext. 5239 Village on the Green ship; in a guarenteed money making on dealing Also Available 30Yrs Expe- Townhouse for Rent profit of 50% income with very little stress at the Davis Centre, Uof W, rience Call 747-0697 (1) 2577 7:00 Summer Sublet 4of 5 rooms available in May or capital required. Willing to rc-lo- room at pm Tuesday

March 29. the WLU / Bedrooms Left Sept '94 cate. Write stating business experi- Sponsored by Lloyd's stereo -CD dual cassette - UW Christian Science 314 Spruce St. (close to WLU) -clean close to WLU - tennis court ence, name, and phone # to: Organization. record player stand and two speak-

$ 125 / month & util. - A/C

- 2 old, used. 150 ers years barely $ Students Bricker 3 Bathrooms, -laundry facilities - avail- Mr. DaveCail Graduate The next obo Call 888-7114 Laundry parking News will be in 884-1970 ext. 5264 able. "Home Video" Concessions Street appearing

mailboxes Be Call Sue @ 885-5509 General Delivery your grad on Monday. 1984 Camaro 180 000 km (mostly read before vote! SUBLET Kitchener, Ontario sure to you Highway) winter stored, needs some

- ' m ' nute from WLU 5 Bedroom House available May N2G 2WB work 000 or best Call Ryan at HEY What if... Peter 273#2 State Street 1994 King Street near Ezra. Two TAPERS! 884-0710 ext 5252 (1) radioac- 4 bedrooms bathrooms, laundry, lots of parking. International Financial Services Parker had been bitten by a

2 baths licensed. 1 lease $ 500/month. Career tive duck instead of a spider? Quack PINK FLOYD TICKETS! year I Marketing Company Seeking

Call John 725-5768 Call 888-0258 or 884-5017 Oriented Individuals With Leader- quack! For Sale July 6 @ CNE Stadium To shi P Ability And A Desire Call Dan: 570-4041 L.S.F.L. Volunteers! Whatta Great Deal 7& 5 Bedroom houses for rent, park- Quickly Accept Major Responsibili-

thank for an ex- available, close to all ties. Call (519) 571-9801 ext. 47 For We wanted to you Cheap! ing, laundry ( Canadian Grown Ginseng 12 cellent Summer Sublet on Ezra Ave. amenities, close to Interview.(l) first year! Way to go guys! For Sale 742-4041 University.

--- And 1 Room Available month lease. Mark or James 747- we hope to see you back next

female 0683 $285 /month STUDENTS - Teach Conversa- NOW AVAILABLE Preferably year!

$ 145 / month plus utilities tionalEnglish year round, short term T-shirts featuring a Cerebella car- 725-5589 for Ja Hon Kon Nicole. Will be "Mrs. or summcr in P an S S- you my toon by Ryan Feeley are available - Taiwan, Korea. Excel- Leonard" and start a with for 15 bucks each. Come W Singapore, "dump" only up to No me?? Love Paul Two Roomates Needed. lent pay. experience or qualifica- Student Publications for more de-

Great Place on Albert &University tions needed. For details on living / - ta j|s

Aprox. $280 / month Tarot Card Readings! working conditions and how you can How is the University spending your

Vote Kmet Call: 884-1569 Call Heather M. @ 747-2704 (1) our free brochure at Let's find out! -dNt. apply pick up money?

JT* IP Vox* The Cord office or write to Asia for Board of Governors

Available Sept. 94 Mastering The LSAT - "Everything Facts (WLU). P.O. Box 93. King- — *j*

' 5 Bedroom House With LotsOfChar- the LSAT. ON K7L 4V6. Thermal Woman: Coffee, tea or you need to know about ston, (1)

- both? it be cold for acter. Nicely Decorated, Plenty Of but didn't know you should ask!" 1 May never too

Don't - "F" Waterloo Area. 1 800 567-PREP. EXCELLENT EXTRA shorts! the man Hosemate Wanted Parking, Uptown Despair

Naul! ear Lease. $1350 / month. 576- INCOME NOW! can't work days forever(Super) $275 / month (utilities included)

475 Or 888-7377 Word Service. --- $600-800 Evil. 5 min walk to WLU 1 (1) Processing Reports. Envelope Stuffing

resumes, letters, lists, form week Call 884-0710 mailing every

2 Large Rooms Sublet Rhinos and Roses I For letters, etc. on Laser Free Details: SASE to Smiles: Forever. Ext 5108 5110 5103 recycled paper.

James of Will Miss You. Love Evil. On St. (off King, across printing, dictaphone, equation edit- International Inc.

rom Ezra). 3 min. walk to WLU. available. 1375 Island Ave. - Summer Sublet ing, optical scanning Coney

furnished. Partially Large rec room. Audrey 884-71 23 (2) Brooklyn. New York 1 230 7) Jello: 3 down, Ito go! I'll send you So close you can hork a loogec on I (1 2 bathrooms, $ 150 - negoti- --- a postcard from Russia! Love Evil. WLU. $150 a month. Furnished 3 garage.

able. Call Lisa now @ 884-5943 (1) EXAMS ARE COMING! Tutors EXCITING NEW BUSINESS OP- out of 4 bedrooms available. 310-3

available in calculus, math, physics, PORTUNITY TREVOR & STEVE: How about Hawthorn St. Call Lynn or Sue. 886-

Available 94 German, and Call 886-2928 Job "...in 0f..."? What will Ido 4293. Sept. biology. Summer Managers Required memory

3 Bedroom And 2 Bedroom Units in Coast to Coast. Excellent Resume without you? Eener.

Duplex. 3 Bedroom Unit, Word and edit- Low Risk Profit, House For Rent Spacious processing thorough Experience, High

AndClean, Parking, Lakeshore Area, ing by experienced english teacher Selling and Installing Inground Irri- Rainbo(so) - The one and only G.I. 3 bedrooms, laundry, parking, $275 Close To All Amenities, Year Lease and freelance writer. Vocabulary, gation Systems, Call: STUDENT Joe. Happy Birthday maniac. per month plus utilities, 31 Mayfield 1 you $805 / Month. 2 Bedroom Unit 1 redundancies, concision. SPRINKLERS Evil. Ave. 884-7951 structure, 1-800-265-7691.(1)

Year Lease $495 / Month 888-7377 style. Introductory rate. 748-2838.

(l CLOSER THAN RESIDENCE > 0) Congratulations to next year's 1M /A M

- — - and Summer Sublet sports editor Scott Stinson as-

Sublet in downtown Toronto Perfection on Professional sistant editor Pete Robinson. -9 Rooms or Two 4 Bedroom Units Paper. sports

May 'st word Grad Your Predecessors 2 bathrooms, 2 kitchens, 5 fridges, • processing by University 2 bedrooms free & lg. solarium (English). Minor grammar correc- Summer Sublets laundry, furnished living room,

baths check 10 Second Walk ~ tions, spell available, same max. 7 people Ann:

Own and service. Laser Printer. Call $125/ Rent negotiable laundry parking day month 1 hate being away from you! Soon it

Great and Suzanne - Call 884-7789 condominium facilities at 886-3857. (EOT, TS) 5 mins from WLU will be all over I promise.

security — Love James " M III?;., ... \Ao\ «•

Pocket - Corner K - Centre Spot m wilf's - The Turret

I \/\ / and Laurier Live /H\ / self-motivated are personable, If you energetic,

work in environment and willing to super

PLEASE APPLY NOW ! Deadlines: {

- 21 Corner Pocket Mar .':,• for Bars, Centre Spot, Managers J

All other Positions -- Mar 31/94

and Summer will in April for Fall posltioniiy w Interviews begin

WHAT'S HAPPENING THIS WEEK: MARCH

„

Wed. 30th Thurs. 31th Frl. 25th Sat. 26th Thurs. 24th Sun. 27th

FRIENDS LAST - THE^TWIST ! , AT w lf . Wilf's: 0F STU THURSDAY WITH Lowest of the THE FLAMING COMEDY Mon. 28th A Low Tickets O'HARA'S ROYAL BLOOD 1 A Wrj Birthday Party SKETCH $6 Advance TURRET AT THE TURRET COMEDY at the cupcakes/prizes Tue. 29th Centre Spot

Loads of Fun —

m ~. m t ,

® I EXAM SPECIAL T ) / % ■ | 3£ A SPECIAL THANK YOU

CLIFF ERICKSON cj TO OUR SPONSORS -

I comes to -// \ ).. !■

TienHoa Trace Screen o Printing WILF'S CP .//A I/I 9ki ta V S ° \ IJ / Ginos Pizza Big Pharmacy S Adults Only Video Shoppers Drug Mart " 14-15-16 April | Jumbo Video Gus Maue Sports I Krebs Restaurant • Get There Early Kelsey's I The Heuther Golf's Steak House jg* I. i%"fn / j W Parlour Second #% $ Old The Cup .. nvlY , r , AM English _ Your Stress § Rsll6V6 Mr. Grocer's Princess Cinema I Waterloo „ / j t Superfresh Bowling

A— / Jik Zehrs Lanes

& Gold McGuiver's Restaurant y ' Hi Hi Purple

Budweiser Coca Cola IBB! - rV/ • jl/ Jamiesons East West Futons

' Cyclepath Futon 2001

E Dufferin Games Molson 2 Positions Still Available at the Student's Union mpM March 5 Snooker These to make the sponsors helped Saturday, The Corner Pocket thanks them and all Tournament a great success. 1 JV A nrr 7WI n irror 1. iVlrilKtrlinV> contributions. manager participants for their 2. Bacchus Director Ijgl

Congratulations to our Champion: Applications available in WLUSU Central #1% the one, the only, the man... an Christopher Coupal. DUE MARCH 30th W

call for details