THE OBSERVER Volume 17, Number 5 College at Lincoln Center, Fordham University, New York March 31,1993 BOMB SCARE Language Programs AT ROSE HILL to be Consolidated By Clare Saliba Fordham University may not be able to sustain Louise Mirrer, Chairperson of the Humanities all of its major programs in the modern languages Division, feels that although it is "important not to in their present form. The Observer has learned. offer the same courses on both campuses," she In an effort to make the most of College at Lincoln "doesn't want to see any of our major courses Center and Fordham College language programs dropped." and to minimize duplication, course offerings in In addition, some majors, such as Russian and the foreign language department will begin to be German, may have to be eliminated altogether. integrated as early as Fall 1993. A definitive plan Regardless of which option is implemented, of action will be in place by this June. faculty and some student travel between the cam- The consolidation is the result to decreasing puses appears to be inevitable. enrollment in elective upper level courses in for- According to Professor Jean Macary, Chair- eign languages on both campuses of the Univer- man of the Modern Languages Department at sity, say administrative sources. Fordham College, "For the time being, two of our A number of options are being considered in professors will be teaching at [CLC] in the Fall order to make such.a collaboration both academi- and we have invited someone to teach in Spring 1994 at Rose Hill." Therefore, only three out of forty language professors will be affected in the Police respond to bomb threat at RH last Saturday immediate future, he said. Language majors may be Macary said he doesn't "know how [the exchange of faculty] can work easily." "It would By JP Connolly only offered at one campus be great if there was an excess of professors but two cars and the inspector in charge of the borough At 11:00 am Saturday, March 27, Rose Hill there isn't. There are only a few teachers in each of Bronx and Queens and the whole task force security received an anonymous phone call stat- wing [French, Spanish, Italian, and Russian] and were here," said Carroll. ing that there was a bomb in the Lombardi Center our faculty is limited," said Macary. "We have All were called because wanted to "expedite Gym that would detonate at 11:30 am, said John cally and financially beneficial for both of the reduced our upper level offerings already," he the search and get the building back to its use Carroll, Head of Security. colleges. Most of these options would require continued, "and some programs will be com- immediately." "Bronx Duty Captain Kissick re- According to Carol, the caller Was an adult some degree of faculty and student traveling pletely closed." sponded and personally declared the building safe male with a middle eastern accent. between the two campuses. "The exchange of faculty has occurred be- after a search by the officers and by security" said The student worker who received the call alerted One possibility, according to Dr. Frederick fore," said Mirrer. Professors from Rose Hill who Carroll. "When it was declared safe everyone was Carl Greenberg, the weekend supervisor. Harris, Professor of French and Comparative Lit- have taught at CLC in the past have been success- brought back in. The overriding issue was mat Greenberg immediately notified Carroll who ana- erature, would be to "reduce the number of [for- ful, she said. lives were protected and nobody got hurt" said lyzed the information and ordered the evacuation eign language] offerings [at CLC] and Rose Hill "Some faculty members will be very enthu- Carol. of McGinley and Lombardi Center. "The in hopes that we can retain a major on both siastic about teaching at Rose Hill," said Macary. The people evacuated from the building waited limited amount of time I had would not have campuses. This would probably mean that stu- "I wouldn't say that we were enthusiastic but outside for more than an hour as Fordham security allowed me to search the Gym" said Carroll. dents would have to move back and forth to some none of us is opposed [to traveling to the other tJong with the police searched the building. When There was aCatholic Youth Organization event extent to complete a major but they would not campus]," said Mirrer. "If there's a need and if it the police left, the building was re-opened along being held in the gym at the time of the call, said have to do all of their major on another campus," will help our programs then faculty exchange with the cafeteria and everything started rolling Carroll. Over 1,000 people occupied the building said Harris. seems to be a solution," she said. again. at the time including elementary level cheerlead- Another alternative, said Harris, i s All of the professors who were interviewed ers, university students and Fordham employees. Carroll did say that "there is a threat and they that "majors [in French, Italian and acknowledged that the integration might be diffi- [the detective squad] can do a follow up on it" Bomb threats in schools are very common, Spanish] will be housed either on one campus or cult for students. " I don't think that the faculty Carroll then stated that he "prefer[s] not to com- said Carroll but "Fordham cannot put any body's the other." "In this case," he said, "any student on minds traveling. I think that it's going to be more ment on what ever further'investigation is going life in danger. We don't evacuate every time,there the campus in which the major is not being offered difficult for the students," said Harris. "The on" but he did say that "we [Fordham security and is a bomb scare. It's based on a number of deci- would have to travel to the other campus to take students are different from the faculty. Traveling 48 precinct] are looking into see who made this sions all put together and totaled up, and see which that major." takes a lot of time-probably a minimum of one or way to go," Carroll said. call." "The 48th precinct responded, a sergeant and Continued on page 3 continued on page 2 Mariott Accused of Food Poisoning

By Lori Majewski Flyers alleging the n jnt food poisoning of WARNING!!! nine Fordham students from food consumed in the university cafeteria were displayed around Mariott workers AT LEAST NINE the Lowenstein building last Wednesday. in the CLC cafete- STUDENTS HAVE While students and faculty reacted by re- ria (right) serve evaluating the on-campus food services avail- BEEN TREATED able, representatives of Marriott, the company 2,000 customers a RECENTLY FOR which supplies and serves the food available in day, according to the Lowenstein, Lincoln Center and McGinley Dawn Hackett, POOD POISONING Center, Rose Hill cafeterias, disputed the allega- food service direc- tions that students became ill after eating their FROM FOOD EATEN IN THE food. In fact. Dawn Hacked, food service direc- tor. FORDHAM UNIV. CAFETERIA. tor for Marriott at Lincoln Center, said that the W SUGGEST WHIfiG ELSEWHERE company has no record of a single food poison- ing incident in its six years at Fordham. AT THIS THE FDR YOU* OVW "I take this personally," I lacked said. "I don't "It's absolutely not true," said Carole "I was in shock. I always hear stories like "They do this as a hobby, llie managers make sure that PROTECTION McCoskcy, retail manager for Marriott in Lin- don't wash the vegetables,' so it kind of made each and every day people arc doing their job coln Center. "We don't have any idea who did it. sense. But I realized shortly afterwards that (the correctly. I have 40 employees who do this for a Muybc it was a dissatisfied customer." flyer) was probubly done by some kid." living. They're not fooling around." McCoskcy said that she and other Marriott Some students believed the flyer was meant as Ironically, last Wednesday, the duy after the employees removed six of the flyers discovered a joke, given the old myth about airplane, hospital flyers uppcared, the Board of Health visited the Unauthorized flyer (above) in the elevators on the fifth and sixth floors and and school cafeteria food. Marriott employees, cafeteria for a routine inspection. The Board re- in several rcstrooms, however, were not laughing. posted around CLC last week ported no violations of food protection or prepara- (IDA student Belli Karp found u flyer in a "It's a malicious thing to do," McCoskcy sold. alarmed sonic students and "We take a lot of pride in what we do and it really tion codes. The inspectors' only complaints con- fifth floor phone booth. cerned the luck of "HinployccK must wash their amused others. hurU." "At first 1 wns like, 'Oh my Oodl," Karp Raid. continued on page 3

Arts: News; Butthole Surfers interview, p. 11 Bomb Threat at Rose Hill "Heine's celebrates its 30th USC Update t, Page 2 - CLC Observer - March 31, 1993 NEWS Learning to Live

By Sean Gallagher A forum sponsored by HEOP-SO (Higher Education Opportunity Organization Student Or- ganization) brought 3 speakers from the People with AIDS Coalition to CLC on Thursday, March 25. "I have a disease, I am not the disease," said Red, an HIV+ mother and grandmother. Two of the three speakers chose only to use their first "It's been an enlightening experience," she names during the hour and a half long program. said of her infection with the virus. She said it has Each of the speakers shared their personal expe- taughthermore about survival than she had known. rience coming to terms and living with AIDS. "It's been a blessing," she said. She stressed her "My primary interest was drugs," said Jules, reliance on a power greater than herself in helping who would have called himself a Republican a to live day to day. 'I'm living with AIDS today, few years ago. All three speakers attributed their but 24 hours isn't guaranteed to anyone," she said. infection with the HTV virus to drug use that She said she had respect for herself today. included injected heroin. Bill Thompson, the son The speakers expressed hope that the Clinton of a minister, said, "you don't have to be an addict Administration would work to relieving the suf- to get AIDS." AIDS, "is non-discriminatory," fering of people with AIDS. Jules said that the said Jules. disease was now killing more and more teens and Jules, an NYU graduate, said that he must women, while it was leveling off or decreasing have contracted the virus between 1979 and 1983, among other groups. "It's going to get much when HTV was gaining a larger foothold among worse. There's still a lot of denial among teenag- addicts. He said that the, "majority of Americans ers in America," Jules said. "You have to take care like to blame" the person who contracted the Bill and Red before the lecture on living with AIDS of yourself. That is your responsibility," Bill said disease. They say, "it's your fault." Jules said that of sex. attitude was further underscored during the Reagan The organizers were pleased with the presen- and Bush Administrations. people with compromised immune systems responsibility for the disease. "All of a sudden I tation, but were disappointed with the turn out. "We're making very little progress on needle Like the other speakers, he supported ACTUP didn't want to die," he said. He has since returned "The turn out wasn't what we expected," said exchange programs," Jules said. He said that (AIDS Coalition to Unleash Power). "They've to New York seeking better care and support. Maricela Brea, CLC '93. She felt there was a needle exchange programs in the United States served me and everyone else who has AIDS, Even after coming to New York it was quite general lack of participation at CLC. Between ten were only just getting underway to hamper the whether they know it or not," Jules said. Bill said some time before he could confide in people. and fifteen students came to the presentation, spread of AIDS, while England, where needle ACTUP was the only way to get change. "Once you've been infected, there's no turning which was being filmed by a documentary crew. exchange programs have been in existence since Bill's first exposure to AIDS came when, he back," he said. He called New York one of the "I think the people that were here came out with a the pandemic began, has managed to slow the discovered his companion was sick. "It became most progressive cities in the country in dealing better understanding than they had when they spread among heroin addicts. apparent that something was wrong. Something with AIDS. "We can leam to co-exist," with came in," said Mary Covello, CLC '96, vice Jules has been married for ten years and his was radically wrong," he said. His lover had been AIDS, Bill said. president of HEOP-SO. "The content of the wife is HIV-, he said. They are tested every six wearing layers of clothing to hide the weight loss Red said that when AIDS was first coming to lecture was excellent," Covello said. he was experiencing, he said. Bill moved to Penn- months and practice safe sex. "My wife never the forefront of people's minds it was a gay • "When some people were asked to come they sylvania shortly after his lover's death. wavered," when be told her of his diagnosis, he disease. "I wasn't gay stfl had nothing to worry said that they didn't want to bear about [AIDS]," said. "You live with complete uncertainty," he "I always felt like people could look at me and about. Surprise," she said. She described shooting Red gave a warning to those who thought AIDS said of his co-existence with the virus. Jules has see this disease in me," Bill said. Bill, who was galleries and dirty needles. "I also have the disease was not their problem. "If you're not infected, you not yet bad a major opportunistic infection. Op- Uving in a small town when he was told he was of addiction." Red said it is crucial to her to keep are affected," she said. portunistic infections are illnesses which attack HTV+, told no one out of fear of facing and taking a positive outlook.

Languages Dembo to Head Continued from page 1

two hours, which would be difficult for Some National Public Radio students," saidMacary. 'It is important to keep the majors on both campuses," said Miner. 'Traditionally, we've bad excellent programs in the language depart- ment, and very brilliant students, with a high percentage going on to graduate level," she said. All of the CLC students who were interviewed reacted very negatively to the idea of traveling to Rose Hill to take classes in order to complete a major or fulfill the language requirement. Prof. Joseph Dembo Sandra Delgado, CLC '95, doesn't think that "If we had wanted to go to Rose Hill then we with students would have, [traveling] a waste of time." Brian Foote, CLC '96, agreed. "Their lan- during a class guage classes meet at 8:00 in the morning five days a week, including Friday. That means we'd have to take the 7: IS Ran van. It's just not fair, when [Rose Hill students] can roll out of bed at five minutes to eight and go to class." "It's a mistake to use CLC to better [Rose Hill]," said Carol O'Brien. "They are always trying to integrate us," she continued, "If we had wanted to go there then we would have." "It's just not fair. I go to school and have a part time job. I don't have time to be running around the five boroughs of New York just to take a By Scan Gallagher language class. I went to the Lincoln Center Joseph Dembo, IVofcNsorofMcdiu Studies at tee, said, "We arc fortunate indeed that Joe has campus for a reason-convenience. It's an abso- CLC, has been named acting IVesident of Na- agreed to serve in this capacity. I Ic will have the lutely ridiculous idea to base some languages up tional Public Radio (NPR) according to Mury full support of NCR's bBourd, vice presidents there, I hope that the administration here will 1 Morgan, a spokesperson for NPR. mid stuff as he carries out his duties', " news director of CBS News Radio. woke up and cater to the needs of their own "I feel wry honored Hint they should offer "They talked about It being permanent, but In addition to originating the oll-nowi ndio student* instead of always pandering to those this," Dcinho siild, Dcinho, a former vice presi- I told them I have no interest In moving to formal, his other accomplishments that Include people up in Rose Hill," said one angry fctnnlc dent of CDS News, said he wns looking forward Washington," snid Dembo. He said he wan us mi Academy Award nomination for a collabora- Junior who asked not to be Identified. to four exciting months in Washington IXC. close to a native New Yorker as you can get, tive documentary in 1992. Ho recently planned Regular meetings arc (King held to discuss Ifcinhn's appointment begins In mid-April having lived In the city since 1953. New York, ami hosted a tribute to former CBS News Presi- the proposals with IVofcssor Macnry, Professor mid eomoK nftcr the the departure of NPR Presi- "Is an exciting and good place to live," Dembo dent Fred Friendly. Mirrcr, Kcv. Joseph M, McShanc, SJ., Dean of dent DougliiN J. Rennet, who Is taking u post with said. "I'll he buck In my classrooms at I'ordliam," I'onJhiun College, and lUlward Drislow, Donn of the Clinton Administration. Dembo was vice president of COS news mid on the first day of the next semester, ho wild. "I CLC. ('ur I Ivjiilllm.'.cn, tliuir (if lite sominh commit- executive producer of CBS Morning news and like It here," Dembo snlil. March 31,1993 - CLC Observer - Page 3 NEWS USG Gets Down To Business

By Vivian Lake The March 11 USG meeting began with a tained that he has only one absence, but Plasko 77K Observer from the meeting. By Tina Filiato confrontation between president Stephen Bonfa and other senators agree that he has three. "I ran on a set agenda of what I wanted to Approving the new constitution was at the top of and the Senators over a report in TheObserver of "There's no grounds for me to be impeached," accomplish before my term was over," said Bonfa the agenda at the March 24, United Student the March 3rd meeting, during which Bonfa's said Bonfa. "As far as I know, actions of the USG in his own defense. "I feel I serve the needs of the Government meeting. impeachment was discussed. have been through me, The senate has not pro- constituency. I feel I've done a good job, and I After reviewing the newly proposed constitu- The Observer reported complaints from within posed any new motions," he said. think I continue to serve them well. Maybe I did tion, USG President Stephen Bonfa, called for the USG of excessive absences by senators and Bonfa Plasko then went through a list of four duties not fulfill the letter of the constitution, but does vote to take place. The vote, however, had to be which has kept USG business at a standstill this the USG president must perform under the consti- that make me bad or good? If you ask the people postponed when Senior Senator and President semester. tution which Bonfa has not acted upon. "I don't who put me here, I think they'll say I've done a Pro-Tempore Jim Plasko stated that under the old While members agree that there is plenty of know what grounds you're standing upon," said good job," said Bonfa. constitution a three-quarter vote was needed for blame to go around, some also believe that Stephen Plasko, "but I'm concerned with what will hap- The consensus among the senators was that approval of a new constitution. This would mean Bonfa, has not been doing his job effectively, and impeachment would be counter-productive to that 12 votes in favor of the new constitution this has affected USG's performance overall. USG's future. would be needed for it to be approved. There were With 16 members in attendance, Bonfa qui- only 11 votes available at the meeting. etly faced the senators and asked, "I would like to "Maybe I did not fulfill the A discussion ensued and suggestions were made letter of the constitution, but on how to this overcome this minor technicality. "I think this is the best meet- When no suitable alternative was found, the vote "There's no grounds for me does that make me good or ing we've had" was officially held over to the next meeting. All bad?" members of USG must be present at the next to be impeached." meeting in order for the three-quarter majority to be reached. Other business included the scheduling of a club know what happened here last week. When have "I think we can use this [controversy] to our meeting, where budget planning and club registra- I been considered to be impeached?" pen if we impeach." advantage," said Susan. We should evaluate tion would be discussed, and the Senior cruise. "We discussed impeachment proceedings Plasko also questioned Bonfa's knowledge of what we need to do in the rest of the year." The student survey and forum were also on the according to the [USG] constitution," said Jim the constitution. 'It bothers me that you closed '1 think this is the best meeting we've had. If agenda. Changes involving the survey included Plasko, a senior senator. this meeting and under the constitution this is not this [attendance] is the result of [The Observer's] the addition of questions dealing with child care "I don't remember talking about Bonfa's allowed. It's your job to know the constitution coverage, let them write about me next time," services on campus and extended hours in both the impeachment We looked at the rules and said upside down and backwards," he said. Plasko said Mario Garcia. library on computer center. With regards to the wecouldimpeachalotofpeople,"saidNonnand was referring to flyers Bonfa had posted that The group then got down to the week's busi- student forum, Father William Dolan announced Parenteau, Associate Dean of Student Activi- morning announcing that attendance at the meet- ness, which included budgets for next fall, stu- that one will be held concerning the new dorm and ties. ing was mandatory, and that it would be closed to dent survey to be presented at a forum later in the security on April 14. » Plasko, who is Bonfa's most vociferous op- the public. The constitution states that USG must semester, and revisions of the constitution. Just before the conclusion of the meeting, USG ponent, said he was upset at Bonfa's absences, announce closed meetings 48 hours in advance. I think today's attendance went very well," Treasurer Michael Harrigan, displayed the newly and his performance as president Bonfa main- Bonfa was told of the rule when he tried to eject said Bonfa. "Let's use the energy in this room. I acquired CLC banner. The banner is maroon and think we can make a difference, so let's try.". reads, in white lettering, "Fordham University College at Lincoln Center," with a large ram's head, the Fordham mascot, below it. A decision has not been made yet to where it will be placed. Grant Competition Underway

By Christine Carotenuto The Puerto Rican and Latin American Studies totally to fund the film. If the person is doing more Institute at CLC has announced its annual compe- research, it can be more of a grant" Berger also tition for the Rodriguez Research Grant said stated that the student has to write up a "short, one Susan Berger, Director of the Puerto Rican and page proposal." ITGENT!!!! Latin American Studies Institute. As for the application, Berger stated that it is Berger said that the Rodriguez Grant is "a fund "just a letter describing the project that you have that Dr. Clara Rodrigeuz established form financ- in mind. There's no specific application form but ing her funds that she received from co-editing a it should be fairly specific since it's a research & book entitled, the Puerto Rican Struggle: Essays project" She stated that certain questions such as, Mariott on Survival in the United States. Rodriguez, of the "What's the main point to it? What are you going Social Sciences Division at CLC, instituted the to do?, How are you going to get it done? are The Observer needs Continued from page 1 fund in memory of her father and brother, she said. important questions which must be answered by hands" signs in the restrooms and a sink near the "The editors of the book put all the proceeds the student. "Maybe who you've talked to about PHOTOGRAPHERS grill area. into a fund and each editor has used the funds to the project would help," she said. "Also you do Close to 2,000 customers are served daily in establish grants." need to get two recommendations from faculty the CLC cafeteria, according to Hackett and the "Clara Rodriguez wanted to establish an an- members or other people you have talked to about company has yet to receive a complaint of "food nual grant to encourage students at Fordham Uni- the project." Berger was not sure as to the number Call 636-6255/56 r^ borne illness," or food poisoning. If someone was versity to do independent work on Puerto Rico or of applications given in already. "It usually hasn't to report such an incident, she said, the Board of on Puerto Ricans living in the United States." She been as many as we've wanted. It's usually less Health would be notified immediately. also said that it is not important whether the work than twenty-five. It changes yearly." All students interviewed last week said that is done in the social sciences, the humanities, film, Berger stated that undergraduates are eligible they never experienced food poisoning after din- or media studies. "What is important is that it's a for the grant, and that either campus was eligible. ing in the cafeteria. Some have regreted eating significantpiece of work done or project on Puerto "Rose Hill sends their applications here," she there on occasion, though. Ricans in the United States," said Berger. said. "I bought a sandwich once and the entire bread The Rodriguez Research Giant has been in The selection committee changes each year, was soaked with blood," said Rabia Kbalid, CLC effect for only two years now, she said, this being said Berger. 'It's the Director of the Institute and '96. "I don't know what it was from, but it was its third year since it was instituted in 1990. two other instructors who teach for the institute. If gross," Khalid guesses the blood was from either Berger described the finttowresearch projects there is a project or there are several projects that the food service workers or the meat she was which had won the Grant over the past two years. are very specialized in areas that none of the three Bomb eating. "The first project was of a student who did a film of us know too much about then we bring in Continued from page 1 CLC senior Carmine Boccia said that he be- script," she said. "She did interviews and wrote somebody else," she said. She gave an example came sick after eating bacon and cheese soup from a script based on these interviews dealing with of when there was a discussion about the media the cafeteria last year, 'It left a bad taste In my discrimination and Latinos in the United States." proposal the first year and they brought someone On Friday, April 2 the Spin Doctors (a mtnical mouth and I went into the bathroom and spat it Last year's project still hasn' t been completed, in form the media center to look at it and talk about group) will be performing at Row Hill. When out" she stated. "She's doing a research project on it." After the person U given the grant then they asked, Carroll stated there were no extraconcems. "The sandwiches taste like the plastic wrap- improvement of the welfare system, expectations are also set up with resources, people that they can He also said "I made the decision as to the ping and the pizza always looks scary," said CLC go to for information, laid Berger. of welfare, and the treatment of Puerto Ricans and level of security that was necessary for the Spin senior" Jay Cuasay. "They must be cholesterol Doctors concert weeks ago, this will not change! Latinos in the welfare system," said Berger. "She The deadline for the 1993-1994 Rodriguez freaks with no regard for the heart." That level of security is based on the amount of doing a random sampling at welfare institutions Research Grant li usually a couple of weeks after Any person not satisfied with the food or attendees, and all the potential problems we envi- and trying to complete it by the end of next the deadline, said Berger. "Lait year I remember service In the cafeteria should see a Marriott sioned In looking at the Lombardl Center, doors, month." we extended the deadline for a bit" she said. "I employee and explain the problem, Hackett said. exits, entrances and all of those decisions were Berger stated that the selection committee think there was some talk about extending It thin "If someone gets a sandwich that they're not made in advance and this threat had no effect what looked for "some creativity, originality, and if year also, but I'm not sure. Technically, the satisfied with, they should say something," she »o ever," feasibility could bo done or not. "There IN a time deadline in April tut, and then after all the propos- sold, "Nobody should settle for something less Carroll said that ho expect* copy col Incident* limit. The grant 1» only $500 and it eim Ins used to IIIH are In what wo do I* make Xerox copied of all than they're satisfied with." but IH not concerned with thoHo possibilities. help the (Undent fund the project," islie said. "For (lie proposals and we give them lo all the commit- example, first we did the film nntl used the money tee members." Page 4 - CXC Observer - March 31,1993 FEATURES

Point of Interest Where the Rich and Famous go to eat, Elaine's drink and be merry

By Melanie Torres and old. "We get a lot people j ust starting out, a lot attracted so many people to it over the years? "It's Celebrating its 30th Anniversary, is the infa- of young journalists," says Kauffman. conducive to people in the arts and creative people, mous Elaine's, located at 1703 Second Avenue. Elaine's is best known for its veal chops and a I would say," Kauffman answers with a grin. And After standing in the cold for ten minutes outside great assortment of pastas. Elaine's Northern since we all know that business people can be • Even^songwnters are of the restaurant, I mustered up enough courage Italian kitchen serves from 5:30 in the afternoon quite creative, Kauffman also gets her fair share to go inside and ask for an until 2:00 in the morning. Parties of two or three aware of the "reputation of of "suits." interview. To my surprise, can come in without needing a reservation. How- Elaine \f and write about it m Elaine Kauffman was Throughout the years Elaine's ever, reservations are needed for parties over four. more than willing to give You can call for a reservation at (212) 534-8103. their stng# Itf 1978; Billy has been visited me one, saying that she Even though Elaine's holds such a prestigious by several celeb- Joepielffiiij^'^lsiliefet-" had become used to giv- reputation, her business, Kauffman believes, would rities. Elaine ing interviews to the print have been better benefited if it were located fur- Stricht, a.musi- tin^^^t"ifSn*fc media. In fact this month ther downtown. With that in mind I asked her if cal comedy ac- ^here^^teji'r»i«| alone she has been written she ever considered opening another Elaine's. "It tress, Jacqueline up in Vanity Fair and the just seems like twice the work," she replies. Kennedy Onassis Sunday New York Times. So what exactly brought about this wonderful and her children. Elaine Kauffman first reputation? Well we already know that her food is Jack Nicholson, opened up in April of great, but what makes Elaine's special is the way and Warren t./ "T^wlre all im- 1963, with only ten tables Kauffman greets her customers and makes sure Beatty, just to and a kitchen in the back. that everything is just right. Kauffman gives her /presslsH with your name a few. In She was no rookie to the customers a home away from home atmosphere. fact, the Beatles Halston dress and the restaurant business, but Most importantly Kauffman's staff has been with and the Rolling this was the first time she her for over twenty years, thus helping to promote people that you knew at Stones even came bad run an establishment that family atmosphere. With the publicity that by for a great meal and a cozy environment after Elaine's by herself. Apparently, in- her earlier years, she Elaine's received expansion was inevitable. So in their concerts. When asked if anyone ever came had owned a restaurant in the village with friends, 1968 her restaurant went from ten tables and a And the story of your in to Elaine's that she never expected. "Marlon but when this business closed Kauffman became kitchen to twice the amount of tables and space, 1 Brando," she says. an, "uptown girl." "At the time, thirty years ago, but still only one kitchen. latest success kept em so it was the least expensive place I could find." Kauffman's good friend, actor Michael Caine, v Elaine Kauffman loves the restaurant business. \; '- entertained" Kauffman recalls, "The other thing about this found her atmosphere so inviting that he had his "Dealing one-on-one with people that I'particu- neighborhood was that a lot of people were hun- book party at Elaine's . But at no given moment larly suit," she says as she smiles, "Every day is a gry for a restaurant" should anyone think that Elaine's is only for the new experience." rich and famous. She welcomes everyone, young So what exactly is it about this place that has

A Face in the Crowd She'll get you a job on campus Rose-Marie Raiano By Teresa Yokoi On most Thursdays, inside a little office in the Raiano works out of her office at the Rose Hill .before she comes in to meet with students. of us. We assure them that the door is always financial aid department on the second floor of campus, and takes the Ram van down to CLC on Raiano is often surprised at the number of open." The most rewarding aspect of her job is CLC, you would most likely be able to find a Thursdays, and some Wednesdays when she has students that do apply for work-study on campus. hearing that everything is fine from students, and cheerful and friendly Rose-Marie Raiano busy at to distribute paychecks. According to Raiano, "I guess it affords them the opportunity tono t that they're enjoying what they're doing as much her desk. Rose-Marie Raiano, or "Roe" as some "There's always something new to look forward have to leave campus to work, and the flexibility as she does. "I hope that this is a trend that will of her colleagues, friends, and students address to. I wake up in the to work between continue in student employment because we are her, is the Assistant Director of Student Employ- morning and I want to classes," she says, "we here for them, to help them," she says. ment at both Rose Hill and CLC. go to work, which usually try to match stu- As busy as she is, and as rewarding a job as the Raiano grew up on Manhattan's west side and gives me the indica- dents up with their lik- one she holds in student employment, Rose- later moved to trie Belmont area of the Bronx. She tion that I have not ing. If they come early Marie Raiano is still setting goals for herself. is a graduate of Iona College where she majored reached that point of on, July, August, they There is so much that she feels she has yet to in Spanish. Her life shifted to Florida after gradu- burn out yet." She gets still have a choice. Later accomplish. Covering her mouth, laughing, and ation, where she worked for a while with a South satisfaction from her on, when you just have blushing at the same time, Raiano admits, "I still American import company. "The best thing about job because it is so certain departments have things that I want toexplore . I want to be an my job there," recalls Raiano, "was being able to multi-faceted. "With with positions available, attorney and I also want to be acting. Maybe make use of the language that I learned, and being my job, I get to meet we still try to match there's a meeting point somewhere between those around people all the time." After that experi- people from almost them up with their two professions. Hey, its never toolate . You have ence, she moved back to the Bronx, where she every department." skills." To Raiano, stu- to have goals in mind, if not, what do you have to now resides with her two young sons in the little Being able to also dents who come in to aspire to?" She also would like to finish graduate Italy section just minutes from Rose Hill. work at CLC gives apply for work are more school. Years ago, she had enrolled and took Raiano came to the Fordham community in Raiano a lot of pride. than just mere appli- courses at Fordham University Graduate School October of 1987 as a secretary in the Financial "I call CLC my cants. She enjoys tak- of Arts & Sciences at Rose Hill, but had to put it Aid office at Rose Hill. "I am grateful that I began 'baby'," laughs ing her time getting to on hold. "I thinkl would like to go back and study as a secretary in this office," says Raiano, "I got Raiano. "At Rose Hill know students better, education," She reveals. Rose-Marie Raiano is to know all the operation within the department. it is a little difficult to and finding out their in- definitely a person who likes to try out different As a secretary you are not only responsible to the see everyone because terests and goals. She avenues. administrator, but you are also responsible for it is so spread out, but describes the toys that In the mean time, she is extremely busy as the maintaining and organizing what gqes on in the here at CLC, its one she has on her desk in assistant director of student employment, she has office." Asshe talks animatedly about herself and building so it is easier her office at Dcaly Hall, her hands full as a full-time mother and all that her job.itiseasyto see how much she enjoys what to meet your neigh- in Rose Hill: "A stu- goes on in her daily life. On a final note, she her position provides, and what it enables her to bors." Raiano contin- dent would come in, expresses how amazed she is at students these do. ues, "In the student and I'd say.'How are days, "They are very in charge of their lives. I'm As the Assistant Director of Student Employ- employment office, you? Go ahead and pick so happy tohea r that students who major in acting ment, Raiano began placing students in Decem- we deal with all the offices. Between the two up a toy or game while I look over your applica- and drama, also take minors in other areas of ber 1988. She says that she was a work-study 1 campuses, we handle roughly 100 departments, tion. " She says that it helps to put nervous stu- studies. It is good tohav e something too fall back student herself at Iona College In the Modern and employ about 550-600 students." At CLC dents at ease. on." In regards tohe r job, Raiano concludes that, Language department, therefore she understands alone there are 32 departments and about 120 She explains a great deal about the student "To hove someone come back and thank you for what students go through when they come to see students employed. She says, "It is an ongoing employment office's relationship with the stu- the opportunity that you have given them is very her about positions. She tries her best to make situation when there are vacancies that have to bo dents, "First you have to boor in mind that a lot of rewarding. It makes mo feel extremely good. students comfortable and at ouso when they cotno filled. Even though in the academic world you are those students are freshmen who are new to this. Students aro the lifeline of our program. I would in for interviews, "Being a student worker, hav- sot to a calendar, In student employment wo got to environment. They've never worked before and like to be apart of that program and see It continue ing gone through Uio procedure, I can rclato to the mod a whole now group of students every July, aro anxious about tbo interview. I try to welcome to grow." students." She laughs and adds, "I really enjoy when we place them for (be coming academic them with a big smile and basically let thorn know my job because I look at it as an extension of year," Her vacations are usually planned a week that they can come in anytime and talk to anyone myself, and off-shoot of mo." March 31,1993 - CLC Observer - Page 5 FEATURES No Die Hard Escapes By Vickl Loughery Now that the World Trade Center has been the emergency, the fire gongs will go off. As soon as escape route aside from the one already known to trapped in the elevators and if the shaft Tills with victim of a terrorist attack, who knows where the people hear these-gongs they are to 1) Leave their most people. smoke it then becomes a life-threatening situa- next target will be? It could be the other Twin classroom/office, 2) Go to the nearest stairwell and 'In case of an emergency," said Kenny, "people tion. Tower, or Trump Tower, or Tower Records...My Fordham's four-step escape plan is posted in God, is anywhere safe? The next target could even most classrooms, along with directions to the be our very own Leon Lowenstein building. With "The roof is not a recommended escape route. Nor is nearest stairwell, i.e. an arrow pointing to the left that thought in mind, the Observer decided to find or to the right. It is a relatively simple and easy- out how to get out of Fordham alive in the event of tying yourself to a firehose, kicking out a window, and to-remember procedure, which is good, because a bomb explosion or other life-threatening emer- rapelling down the front of the building..." there is no alternative. gency. Most people are actually aware of Fordham's evacuation plan. In the event of a fire or other walk downstairs, 3) Go out the nearest on the west side of the building should use the west exit, and 4) Move away from the build- stairway, which will bring you down and lead you ing. After you are safely away from the out to the plaza. People on the east side should use building, you may want to 1) Fall down in the east stairwell and either go out the 60th Street a dead faint, and/or 2) Go to the Coliseum entrance, or ex it onto the plaza." Kenny states that IllllllHUHUn and order a number of your favorite, if the school should lose power, or if the halls millintifiilli muscle-relaxing drinks. However, these become filled with smoke, the glowing red EXIT last two steps are optional and not part of signs will remain on and will direct you to the IIUHHMUIUU Fordham's regular evacuation procedure. nearest stairway or fire exit. The stairwells are uuuumml u During the World Trade Center disas- also equipped with fire extinguishers. umimm ter, many people went up to the roof, During evacuation, people should not be afraid nnmmml insteadof going down to theground floors. to use the plaza as an exit. Despite the construc- According to Director of Security Mike tion, Kenny said that the plaza doors remain un- Kenny, although the New York City Po- locked and in the event of a fire, the plaza should lice Department has looked at Fordham's be used as an emergency exit. roof to see if it could possibly be used for Kenny stressed the point that the elevators should landing a helicopter, in case of an emer- not be used during an emergency, saying, "I think gency, the roof is not a recommended that lesson was very well demonstrated with the escape route. Nor is tying yourself to a catastrophe at the World Trade Center." The six firehose, kicking out a window, and elevators at Fordham all work in the same shaft rappelling down the front of the building, and if there is a fire or an explosion the shaft would a la Bruce Willis in Die Hard. As a matter act like a chimney, states Kenny and will immedi- of fact, there is no other recommended ately fill with smoke. People run the risk of being The Twin Towers Plaza entrance of CLC A Taxing Experience

By Jim Wolfe ' want of a better word, dumpy. She wore a purple (The story you are about to read is true. The lowed-out pineapples the size of oil drums. frock that accentuated this dumpiness making her names have been changed to prevent an audit.) "Are you with me?" Ruth said. look somewhat like a mutant grape. It was obvious that Ruth .Weintraub was a "Sorry, I was daydreaming," I replied, "Where 'This is Mr. Fallon, Iris. Oh... what a lovely highly-trained professional. Her silvery hair was do I sign?" purple." Ruth offered. perfectly lacquered into what would be best de- "Just let me get my niece to type this up for "It'snot purple. It's... it's... well it's not purple," scribed as a Grossinger's bouffant.-Her purple you." Lowering her voice to a whisper, she added, Iris whined. Tahari suit, fresh from a rack on Delancey Street, "She's a knockout Twenty-six... And single!" Since it obviously was purple, I supposed that helped to camouflage her matronly bust. Peering Iris Weintraub, the knockout, looked more Iris tired of Aunt Ruth's whispering and med- An English professor was flicking around over the top of her rectangular glasses, she said perhaps like she had been knocked out. She was dling. How many single males has auntie paraded the TV dial looking for something suitable soberly, "It looks like we may have trouble this short, had dull, stringy brown hair and was, for her past in a desperate attempt to marry her off? for his son to watch. He found a rodeo and he year. Let's see. I can put down an eight-hundred and his son began watching it "Wow! Look dollar charitable deduction and oh, let's say two at them bowlegged cowboys!" exclaiamea thousand dollars for journals, magazines and periodicals. That shouldn't raise any flags." the son at one point The professor was hor- rified with this improper use of language and I tried to imagine how many magazine sub- "All fear vanished. The image of the auditor was scriptions it would take to justify the deduction. vowed then and there to begin schooling his Let's see, if it was twenty-five dollars a magazine replaced by one of me, sunning on a Caribbean son in English each evening, with a particu- that would be eighty subscriptions. At Publisher's lar emphasis on the works of Shakespeare. Clearing house prices it would be almost twice beach, sipping Pina Coladas from hollowed-out Two years later, he was again flicking the that. I could picture myself frantically trying to TV dial when he came upon another rodeo. name a hundred and sixty magazines of vital pineapples the size of oil drums." After watching for a few minutes, his son interest to a bartender as the IRS auditor sat stiffly said, "What manner of men are these who in his gray suit, drumming his fingers, stifling a laugh when I got to Good House Keeping, Popu- wear their pants in parenthesesis?" lar Mechanics, and Cat Fancy. "Hey every- body!! Come into my office," he would say into Did they all have refunds due? the intercom, "I've "Come with me, Mr. Falcon," Iris said, rebuk- got a live one." ing her aunt's attempt at matchmaking. "Do you think "That's Fallon, dearie," Ruth said glowering Quote of the Issue it's safe to make over the top of her specs. up a deduc...," I "Ob, yes, FaUon. Well, follow me," she said "Leave each one his touch of folly; started. rolling down the hall. it helps to lighten life's burden which, "That will mean I trailed her to little cubicle that was as dishev- a refund of nine- if he could see himself as is, might be eled as she was. Stacks of files cluttered her desk teen hundred dol- and there was a picture of Aunt Ruth... with the too heavy to carry." lars," Ruth inter- glass cracked. She hunted and pecked at her -John Lancaster Spalding rupted, Remington until she said, "That will be two hun- All fear van- dred dollars, Mr. Mellon. Make the check payable ished. The image to Ruth Weintraub." "If you arc out to describ the truth, of the auditor was "That's Fallen. F-A-L-LON," I sold, signing leave elegance to the taylor." replaced by one of the check. "And by the way that's a lovely purple me, tunning on a •• Albert Einstein ' draii." Caribbean beach, I heard what sounded like Rtoum escaping as I sipping Plna turned and mode my wuy towards the door. Colndus from hoi- Page 6 - CLC Observer - March 31,1993 FEATURES A Face in the Crowd Cheryl Constan

By Cassandra Smith Sitting in a small office across the hall from states Constan, "And it is my job to counsel the paper from my hospital bed," Constan says, "I paper for one of my classes. So, I' ve been looking Adult Admissions, is an exceptional woman. undergraduates in our program in the areas of couldn't come in to classes and I didn't want to at my life as far back as preschool. I can see now Cheryl Constan is one of three student counselors academics... financial aid, personal services, and lose the whole semester of work. [The Director of how each stage of my life was [later] linked who work in the Higher Education Opportunity career planning." H.E.O.P.] Dr. Elena Vranich, assisted me, and our together." Program (HBOP). Being among other things a Currently working on her Master's degree, secretary Amber typed it up when it was finished." Constan pulled out a book, The Fives and Sixes student in the Graduate School of Education here, Constan offers more than advice and support. Her Not surprisingly, in addition to working on her Go to School, by Emma D. Sheehy. She opened Constan is an ideal role model for other students. students witness first hand what the rewards of Masters degree, and working full time in the it to a picture of very young students seated at a More importantly, she can easily identify with persistence can be. For what could be greater than H.E.O.P Program, Constan is also awaiting admis- table in a classroom. She blushed as she asked if students as they go through the daily activities of the benefits acquired in watching her practice sion to a Doctoral program in the Graduate School I could locate her in the picture. Even then she their studies. what she communicates to others? In sharing her Monday through Friday, you can find Constan in experiences with others Constan enhances her her office located in room 803. Her office, adorned communication skills as she establishes trust in "We have a lot of dreams that don't al- with photos of smiling students, is small but over- her relationships with people. "I have seven pa- flowing with an aura of serenity. It is almost pers so far this semester," reveals Constan, "Gradu- ways come true, but this one did." impossible not to submit to the atmosphere of ate school can be stressful-and demanding, but it's comfort that envelops one while speaking to not so much the classes as the wdrk load in- of Education. In view of this, it was surprising to appeared to be engrossed in what the teacher was Constan. And if that's not enough to calm the most volved." witness Constan's modesty in regards to her saying. The picture was taken when she attended nervous person, Constan's walls contain posters Hard work doesn't appear to stop Constan. achievements. But on closer examination of her the Boardman School in Manhattan. Closing the offering strength and encouragement. When she puts her mind to finishing something, earlier education there is no doubt of Constan's book of memories, Constan continues, "I attended For over four years now Constan has been work- nothing stands in her way. Last year for instance, abilities to achieve her goals. When asked about the United Nations International School from ing in the H.E.O.P. department at Lincoln Center. Constan had major surgery and as a result spent her educational background Constan inquired junior high through high school. It was an ex- "H.E.O.P. is a program for students who are at a two months in the hospital during the course of a innocently as to how far back she should go, tremely fortunate opportunity for me." disadvantage both financially, and academically," semester. So what did she do? "I did a ten page "Right now I'm working on an autobiographical Having developed^ an interest in Russian while attending the UN school, language became the focus of her studies when she reached college. Constan attended Manbattanville College, in Westchester, graduating in 1969 with a BA in language; Russian and French. So what accounts for her transition to counselor? "Actually, I got my first full time counseling position kind of haphazardly," Constan says, "I was unemployed, REWARD YOURSELF!and between jobs. I went to my church for assistance and they referred me to a youth pro- gram in East Harlem. I hadn't had any full-time Join GM's Graduation Celebration! experience as a counselor, but I had done some counseling before that for the city on apart-time basis. [After] I was hired I discovered I had a gift for counseling. Buteven back then... whatlreally [wanted] to do was work for a college or a univer- sity. We have a lot of dreams that don't always ' come true, but this one did." Constan also worked at one time in Malcolm King College, and it was there that she gained her experience in H.E.O.P. It was also where she found out about the position in Fordham. As to her students here in Fordham, Constan says she enjoys every minute she has with them. She affirms that she has always had a rapport with her students, and has learned just as much from them, as they have learned from her. "It's a two way street," she adds. When asked what advice she has for Fordham students, Constan says that, "Basically this is not original at all. Stay in school and finish because whatever endeavors you may undertake in the future... you're going to need the basic founda- tion of your education. It's really tough out there [in the real world] even for people who have their education. People are out there looking for work ... its just the times we are living in. But if you don't have an education; it's hopeless ..." Constan says that sometimes it might appear that she is nagging her students but it's important that they know how vital education should be to them. Congratulations Graduates! Take A Test Drive! Get A Free Gift! "I just can't stress it enough. As for H.E.O.P., You've worked hard, accomplished your goals and earned your diploma. Ifyou are eligible to pat ticipate in the GM College Grad Program, I think it is a really good program and that students Now it's time to get ready for the GM College Grad Program. It's a you can test drive any Chevrolet, Chevy Truck, Geo or CMC Truck. have alot of opportunities here at Lincoln Center. great tirtit: lo "Get to Know Geo," "Fee| the Heartbeat of America," or You'll love the experience anil receive your choice of a leather I realize that some of the students here are young "Discover the Strength of Experience." portfolio, electronic data bank or compact disc with our compliments, and don't know what an opportunity they have while supplies last. now. But sooner or later they will come to understand it." Constan spoke about the people Financing Options That Are Right For You! that she met along the road to her career. "Some of Once you've selected your car or truck, GMAC makes it easy lo find them asked me .. well what about your training the financing option that's right for you... from traditional purchase to in Russian and French? To this I say that for now SMARTLKASK™ by GMAC or our newest option, GMAC SMARTBUY.™ it's put behind me ... I feel that counseling and FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS working with people is meant for me. A lot of my Participate Today! friends make a lotof money but they arc miserable Graduates Get $500 Off From GM! To receive your $500 certificale, details on receiving in what they arc doing. I've found that forme ...I'd II you arc about 10 gnidu.ite. have recently graduated from a two- nr your free gill for taking a test drive, and other rather bo happy and fulfilled." lour-yeai i ullcge, or are a graduate student, you may qualify! You can program information, please call: Docs Constan intend to slop at the point sho has receive a SfiOO ceililkale good lowarcf any new Chevrolet. Chrvy Truck, reached now? I don't think so... When accepted Geo or GMCTiuck purchased or leased from n participating dealer, if in the Doctoral Program in Counseling and Psy- you (|ii,ililv .iiid finance through (.MAC Best ol all, lliinsp<< ul discount 1-800-964-GRAD chiatry, there will bo little doubt in my mind that is available m mlililinti lo most oilier rebates and incentives, (Olfci• Expires April 30, 1994) we would bo hearing more about Cheryl Constan. The II.E.O.P. offices arc located in room 803, 8M your pirllelpatlna Chevrolet, Chevrolet Truck, Goo or QMC Truck dwltr (or qualification dalallt. on tho 8th floor at CLC, To roach tho office by phono dial (212) 636-6235. CHEVROLET TSUCK GO®. QMC TRUCK. March 31,1993 - CLC Observer - Page 7 FEATURES Italy The Land and the People By Oleg Kantorovich Prior to my arrival to the United States I had the me in school, the library, on TV and in the movie- cordiality, responsive- chance to live in Italy for a while, the infatuation theater. Italy was the country of my dreams, a ness of herpeople make I developed for this country, herpeople and culture romantic and distant land the legendary poets, up an integral part of will stay with me forever. sculptors, artists and composers. So, you can this culture. It is quite While living in the former Soviet Union, I was imagine how anxious I felt about my upcoming, natural for Italians to quite familiar with certain elements of Italian cul- encounter with the land of Leonardo Da Vinci meet you half-way ture, because I was an amateur-artist who admired and Gianni Rodari. when you ask them for the art of the Italian Renaissance, and because I arrived at the Roman airport Fiumicino and discount in a store, to Italian literature, music and cinema reached out to was met by the friendly smiles of Italy's stop their cars and of- people. I knew only one phrase in fer you a free ride they Italian and that was from the- Divine see you hitchhiking Comedy by Dante Alighieri. However, (This, by the way, is a perfectly safe way of my ignorance of the language did not -"•t >" s-_*»1l8jW*,3gir. •». seem to prevent me from associating traveling) and to with Italians, perhaps because I had a show their concern decent knowledge of French, which is when you ask them similar to Italian. At first, I addressed „ for a favor. And even ^ thebeautyoftheltal- people in French and none of them ever Landscapes that inspire seemed to ignore me. On the contrary, ian landscape seems to be more irresistible be- they always paid real attention to what her Mediterranean picturesque landscapes and the cause you are constantly receiving good feelings I was saying, and always tried to make splendor of her unique ancient and medieval ar- from the people. The people treat you so nicely, sense of it. My French inestimably chitecture - this living legacy of past civilizations. are so willing to teach you their language. The helped me to master Italian, as soon as Most of all, Italy charmed and impressed me with people zealously try to keep up with the old I discovered the close affinity between her warm, kind and cordial people, because for the noble customs of hospitality. The people im- these languages. However, had it not foreigner the benevolent attitude of the native pressed me even more than the ancient cities, been for those Italians who patiently people is crucially important. It provides you with picturesque landscapes and iridescent Mediter- taught me their language at my numer- spiritual comfort, elates your spirit, and makes ranean Sea. We always perceive a foreign land in ous requests, along with my determina- you feel comfortable in an alien place. And in- the light of her people. Because the people are tion, it would have been an impossible deed, most of the people with whom I happened to the major wealth of any country. Because, in the task to achieve. interact with were extremely nice to me. final analysis, the people are what really matters. And of course, for me as an artist, an Italy, first of all, is the country of rich traditions, opportunity to stay in Italy was espe- deeply rooted in antiquity. These traditions shape The friendly people of Italy cially precious. This country fascinated m&,with her unique Italian culture. .And the hospitality,

Request for Nominations for Student Speaker at CLC Diploma & Awards Ceremony, Sunday, May 23, 1993 at Avery Fisher Hall, 3:00 p.m.

1. Nominations for the student speaker are invited from Park & Ride fellow students, faculty and/or adminstrators. One West End Avenue 2. February 1993 graduates and May and September 1993 (at Gtth Street) , degree candidates are eligible for nomination as student 212-246-4256 speaker, providing they have at least a 3.5 grade point average. For May and September 1993 degree candidates, the cumulative grade point average from Fall 1992 will be With this coupon used. The Academic Advising Center will supply or confirm M GPA. I $ 20 OFF 2ND MONTH PARKING RATE 3. The College Activities Committee of the College Council f For Now Monthly Customers Only will review all nominations and recommend to the Dean a 1 list of no more than five finalists. The committee's choice % Reserved Monthly Rate $143.76 + Tax will show a balance between scholastic achievement. The * Mor-ihly Storage Rate $109.94 + Tax Deain will choose the student speaker from the group of f finalists. The deadline for final decision will be approxi- * mately two weeks frm the closing of nominations. I • FRB SHUTTLE WITHIN AREA • OPEN 24 HOURS WIJH SECURITY 4. The finalists will be notified of their standing so their f • at£f AND CORPORATE ACCOUNTS WLCCM interest to speak may be confirmed.

5. Nomination forms are available, in Student Activities, i DAILY RATES LL408, Academic Advising Center, LL819, Adult Programs t Up to 12 hours $5.28 + Tax & Services, LL804, and Division Offices. 1 Up to 24 Itoun $7.19 b Tax Nomination forms should be returned to the Academic I Offer June 15,1993 Advising Center LL819.

Deadline for Nominations Monday. April 12th. 1993 Page 8 - CLC Observer - March 31,1993 EDITORIAL One Fordham

In an effort to minimize course dupliction, the Administration Many students choose CLC for its convenient New York City will begin integrating language courses at Rose Hill and CLC as location and the convenient class schedules. Already, a trip to Rose early as Fall 1993. The integration is a part of the overall integra- Hill and back costs $2 per trip. Fortunately for Rose Hill students tion of Rose Hill and CLC into one Fordham. Definite plans will taking classes at Lincoln Center, there are free passes available to be available in June, at the end of the semester, but the Adminis- them.But not so for CLC students. tration is hoping to make the plan financially and academically beneficial for all students and faculty. Traditionally, there has been a double standard in dealing with CLC, with CLC catering to the needs of Rose Hill. In this case, the But, for students, this means increased travelling and a disrup- future of CLC as a part of the Fordham University, is being tion of an education program already in progress'at one campus.. jeopardized. A decision of this magnitude, affecting the majors and What does this mean for adult students taking classes at night? foreign language requirements of all students has to be decided What does this mean for day students who hold part-time jobs? with all students and faculty involved. An open forum, involving What does this mean for commuting students? students and faculty, is in order.

Some majors, Russian and German, may also be phased out The University is trying to save money at the expense and entirely. This is in addition to cut backs in the number of classes convenience of students and faculty. It will ultimately cost more, being offered each semester.

LETTER

The Editor: I bad the unfortunate experience of learning a physically present to sign in a guest. should, is enforced consistently, and that all policy has to be passed on by word of mouth. disappointing truth about our "security system." I find nothing wrong with this policy. I find individuals affected by the policy are adequately I believe that if Fordham security had been differ- everything wrong with the inconsistent enforce- informed of it. Sincerely, ent and the "guards" of our institution more ment ofithe policy, which confuses the students, I hope that none of you ever experience the Elena Paraskevas helpful, a painful experience could have been and with the lack of visible announcements^ the terror and confusion I experienced because of a prevented. ' policy (one flyer on each floor near the elevators sloppy, indifferent and ineffective system. I have Our institution is our second home. Many of us would be sufficient). A been able to inform some students, much to their relief, of these rules when I happened to see them bring friends, family and significant others to I am also horrified at the behavior of the guards, anxiously waiting for a friend coming-from out- visit, tour the building, spend the day in our who could have been more helpful on that day to side the building. I find it sad that such a crucial classes or eaj with us in our cafeteria. Of course a scared minor. They could have done so many the new "stricter" security policy, effective Janu- things, without violating their policy and without ary 1, 1993, has supposedly accommodated this straining their mental capacity, to prevent me with new "sign-in" rules, visitors/temporary passes from believing that some harm had come to my 1IIIIIIUI II III Mill I IS*,, and I.D. checks upon entering the building. sister in the three hours for which I waited for her. This new policy has been the bureaucratic joke It did not occur to me to check the entrance, mini nimimnum of the year. Students and visitors (strangers) have because on my sister's previous visits, she was at times strolled into the building without show- allowed in simply after signing the binder. Kind of 11111111111111 f; ing identification. After the fire drill on Wednes- misleading isn't it? HI1MII day March 3, a swarm of students, professors and What kind of training do they receive anyway? other unidentified persons entered the building. My sister pleaded with them: "She was waiting on Perhaps it was too inconvenient for security to the second floor lounge, on the couch at the far check for identification at a time when our school right, closest to the Bursar's office." But they said iniumm was most vulnerable to the entrance of undesir- they could not leave their posts to escort her. I am able individuals. sure that they do leave once in awhile to relieve I'm not suggesting that entrance to the school basic human needs; it would have taken less time be unrestricted - in fact, here is where my story to escort her to the second floor. I cannot blame begins. On March 3, my younger sister (and them for doing their job - anyone can see the need legally my ward; the sometimes prolonged ab- for five security guards to be crowded at that tiny sence of my parents made this necessary to facili- desk by the front entrance. Who was asking them tate action in emergencies) visited me at Fordham, to search the whole school? I could have been as she usually does several times a week. As a found in a specific six foot square planned area. student at the High School of the Performing Arts, But, let's go by the book: The guards must and the School of American Ballet, both across remain riveted to their spot. Would it have been the street, she comes to Fordham often and knows too much trouble to ask one of the entering stu- the lay-out very well. We usually met at the dents to stop on the second floor, stick their head cafeteria, where I waited for her. She was usually out of the elevator and yell, "Elena, your sister is allowed in after signing the binder at the entrance waiting downstairs." Would it have been impos- of the Lowenstein Building. Never during her sible to notify the Student's Activities Office and visits did the procedure change. Ncverdid it vary. arrange for a visitor's pass, as standard procedure Editor-in-Chief John Stocker Never was it questioned. requires? Managing Editor Anastasia Damianakos Staff: Christine Carotenuto, John Cummings, That day, we had arranged to meet at 3:00 pm I don't expect a bureaucratic system to cater to News Editor Vivian Lake Amad Fontie, Mario Garcia, Oleg Kantorovich, at the second floor lounge. When 4: IS pm came my needs and to make exceptions for me by Asst. News Beth Karp, Erna Leslie, Vicki Loughery, Felix around and my sister didn't, I began to worry. By violating precious policy. But I do expect from Editor Clare Saliba Nunez, Rebecca Sausner, Karen Sbaschnig, 5:00 pm, I was hysterical. I called home and left trained professionals hired to protect me and other Cassandra Smith, Melanie Torres, Jim Wolfe, distraught messages on the answering machine, students, logical reactions within the confines of Features Editors TinaFiliato Teresa Yokoi. which later worried the whole family. I even policy. And I expect to be protected, not harmed, Rebecca Sausner colled the Ballet School in an attempt to locate by their decisions and actions. Arts Editor AdamWolvek her. At 6:00 pm, I found out what had happened. Is the training of our security personnel limited Commentary The guards at the entrance had kept my sister in to sitting at a desk? Can they not adapt to new Editor John Cummings Editors Emeritus the lobby for three hours. situations presented to them? Would they have Donna Hemans, Mina Landriscina, Sean Anyone can understand the need for restricting been ready to accept the responsibility had any Sports Editor J P Connolly Gallagher, Lori Majewski, Brian Hayes entrance to unidentified individuals in an educa- harm come to my underaged sister while she was Faculty Consultant Elizabeth Stone tional and business institution. Out, if one were to in their "care?" How would they have reacted in uslc any student of Fordham what the policy an emergency if a visitor had to contact a Fordham The CLC Observer Is the independent newspaper of the College at Lincoln Center, concerning visitors is (which I did), no answer student? Fordham University, New York. The opinion* expressedln the Observer, Including those would be the name. This personal incident has uncovered deficien- in columns, letters and graphics, are those of the Individual writer or artist. Those "Don't they just sign in?" cies, cither in the policy or the enforcement of it, expressed In the editorial sare the opinions of the editorial board. No part of the Observer "My friend went to 408 and got a visitor's that can have detrimental consequences for our puns," university. I am not asking for the violation of • Including articles, advertisements, photographs, and graphics - may be reproduced in "They didn't ask for I.D." policy, but rather the protection of it. I am asking any way, shape or form without the express written permission of the editorial board. 'llio policy is Oils: A I'ordhiun student must ho that policy does what it should, protects whom it For details contact the CLC Observer, Box 18, Lincoln Center Campus, Fordham University, New York/New York 10023, Room 420. Telephone 212 - 636 - 6255. March 31,1993 - CLC Observer - Page 9 COMMENTARY One Cheer For (Catholic) Fordham Accepting Multicultural By Patrick J. ReUly I thought it might never happen. Yet only three Fordham is nol Jesuit and presently nol Catholic, pro-abortion group is indicative of a willingness years after Fordham's administrators officially according to Pope John gaul II' s recent encyclical to restore Fordbam's commitment to Catholic supported an abortion advocacy group, the sadly on higher education. teachings and the moral development of its stu- Education mistaken and potentially dangerous "Students for Only traces of the "Old Maroon" still exist, dents - but I cannot be convinced by a single Choice" club has been rejected outright - and for including the administration's recent decisions to decision. If that were the case, then any one of the By Cuervo Gold the appropriate moral reasons. forbid condom sales and abortion advocacy. horrible decisions I witnessed a few years ago at A while ago one of Jesse Helms' supporters So while I join my fellow alumni in encouraging Fordham rides the ebb and flow of a "Catholic Fordham would have convinced me that Fordham came to visit our lovely campus. Despite our con- further change at Fordham, I must praise the tradition," but the inconsistency of the University's was on an irreversible journey to oblivion (and struction work, be was quite impressed with the oil Fordham administration for a decision that must devotion to that "tradition" is exactly where the many wise people have told me so). While I painting of John Houston and complimented the have been extremely difficult to make. After all, - problem lies. Is Fordham an institution firmly believe no course of action is irreversible, Fordham Marriot cafeteria on the variety and "tastiness" of these are the same administrators who vigorously rooted in the Catholic faith or not? The question certainly is headed toward oblivion, if only be- its offerings. Between jelly donuts and coffee, he advocated anarchist free expression as an excuse demands a "yes" or "no" answer, not the blather- cause the University refuses to address its own read the Observer and spoke to some of the more for officially supporting a pro-abortion group. ing mumbo-jumbo that escapes both sides of our identity crisis in a serious manner. The Board of "representative" students at CLC. What follows is Father Shea and Father O'Hare must have had a ' President's mouth. Students writing in campus Trustees and Father O'Hare continue to avoid a transcript of an informal chat with our friend from change of heart - and I wish them a multitude of publications repeatedly have called on the admin- any real decision on Fordham's identity, although the far right: graces for their apparent courage and newfound istration to define Fordham and its mission. Alumni it is important that a decision be made soon. A lot of folks at Fordham are sick and tired of all desire to maintain Fordham as a Catholic institu- have done the same. Despite all the harmful con- As die University publications are less than this fuss over lesbians and gays, African and Latino tion. troversy and a puppet display by O'Hare's "Com- adequate in their coverage of this institutional studies and the demands they make. Here is the I would be neglectful to praise the decision, mittee on the Year 2000," Fordham has not yet crisis, I invite students to write me for an accurate University nice enough to let them join their club however, without pointing out the most difficult resolved whether or not it will adhere to Church summary of the problems at Fordham. As founder and then they turn around and start rocking the and hypocritical position it places Fordham in. teachings in a consistent manner. and coordinator of an ad hoc association of boat. They want to change the curriculum, start Father Shea's insistence that "Fordham is not The problems will not go away, as Father Shea Fordham alumni, I have attempted to keep circulating that homosexuality stuff around decent neutral on this moral issue [of abortion]" requires learned with the return of the pro-abortion club. Fordham accountable to its supporters, who de- young people, and have everybody say, 'well thank immediate displays of the University's sincerity Fordham Lesbians and Gays (FLAG) has as- liberately are kept uninformed by the administra- you very much.', And don't ever try to say, 'now in advocating pro-life values. Father Shea also sumed a new name and has garnered the endorse- tion. To a lesser extent, students also are kept hold on a minute.'Why, they cry louder than a babe claims that Fordham is "a University in the Catho- ment of Campus Ministries (the recent George uninformed about the larger issues and are often taken from a sugar teat. lic tradition," which only adds to the general Will controversy certainly exposed the "support misinformed by the campus media. Write: Bunch of ingrates that's all. Starting now, confusion about Fordham's mission. group" as a radical censorship group that does not FLARE.PO.Box 1051, Washington, DC 20013. Fordham has got to tow the line! If this fine Campus publications have been both victims adhere to church teachings that homosexual activ- Together, we must salvage Fordham's future institution wants to keep its prestige, its got to cut and facilitators of this confusion by identifying ity is wrong). Fordham continues to receive for the sake of future students, like you. One to the bone! First to go is its image of a night school Fordham as a "Jesuit university in the Catholic "Bundy" funds,- even though an escape from state hearty cheer for Fordham, with many more to for adults. It's not fair to employers to have a tradition," in line with Fordbam's false advertise- control is more attainable than in recent years. come, I pray. • worker who is too caught up with some paper or ments. Fordham is less "Jesuit" than it is "Catho- Also, I question whether freshmen are still receiv- exam to be a productive employee. More impor- , 8 lic," as the society of Jesus has had absolutely no ing instruction in the use of contraceptives. Does tantly, think of all those latch key kids home alone formal control over Fordham since 1968. Fordham Helpline continue to offer referrals to abortion, 'cause mommy and daddy are too selfish to con- continues to declare itself nonsectarian in order to clinics? Do most Jesuits at Fordham continue to cern themselves with the job of'oeing parents. receive state "Bundy" funds that add up to less remain silent about the moral issues dancing, be- Next cut mat foolish American Pluralism course. than one'percent of operating revunues - rjoj the 10 fore their eyes? Last, I remember there's only one America and one percent that The Ram quite erroneously reported. I hope the administration's decision to reject the American history. If a person takes a notion to study immigration and ethnic cultures, fine. Make it an elective. It just stirs up enmity among people, bringing up old miseries and accusing the freest country on earth of being prejudiced. Hogwash. All those homosexuals got to understand that we don't hate 'em, but their lifestyle is contrary to RETIRING FACULTY: Can You Pass This Exam? what God and scripture has ordained. You came here to study in our club, not to flaunt yourselves. Dept.: Retirement That goes double for all you artsy people, don't try confusing the Bill of Rights with smut and pornog- Course: REAP 550—Take Control of Your Retirement raphy. There ain't no guarantees for people acting trashy. SPRING FINAL EXAMINATION Which brings us to the business of tenure. Now where on earth do you find anybody getting any Question 1: When I am ready to retire, how can I gain the kind of life time guaranteed job? Bel you a new flexibility to: dime that you got professors here who are against the Jesuit tradition, and scoff at Christianity. A a) Choose my level of income review of this institution has got to be done ASAP. If all goes well this will be a-fine club of higher b) Receive lump sum withdrawals at anytime, and learning for a young man to find his way in a world c) Create an estate for my family, gone to the dogs. Who invited this man's opinion? He's simply a without making irrevocable decisions? distillation of all the sugar coated and politely expressed bigotries that are now finding expres- TO RECEIVE THE CORRECT ANSWER sion on our campus. The way the trend is taking DO NOT MISS OUR FREE SEMINAR: shape, we'll be bearing more from Jesse's people. Date: April 12,1993 Time: 3:30 p.m. Place: Dumont Plaza Hotel 450 East 34th Street New York, New York (212) 481-7600 BECOME AN "A"STUDENT OF THE ROAD. A Motorcycle RidtrCouru is for It Is Your Retirement, It Is Your Money everyone who wants lo have more fun riding, while becoming a And Now It Is Your Choice.. . better, safer rider. Call MOO- REAP WHAT YOU SOW! 4474700 to join the class. Call Now for more Information: 1-800-786-1598 The Student Programming Board Presents Upcoming SPB Events

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The New York Post calls Comedy Nizht Jonathan Soloman "one of the hardest working Comedians around." TV appearances include : Thursday, April 1, 1993 Late Night with David Letterman. Star at 9:15PM Search, and The MTV Half Hour Comedy Hour. in the Plaza Cafe Jonathan's fast moving show offers information on everything from how to look cool at the mall when you're 14 and why your parents really don't want to know what you've been up to all JONATHAN weekend, to who's to blame for the hole SOLOMAN in the ozone layer and why men aren't really such jerks.

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--tllMIl WIBHUC ""i-. nn w IMII iwraMi -iintM .mill s,Tr.«WMI "tWiMmi-Wm TJUUl Tuesday and Wednewday, Tuesday April 6th al 2:30PM, April 20 and 21, 1993 and Wednesday April 7lh al 6:30PM SLWM (ml ••|!t|'M In Hi* filmic ill t.uunitr. Hmmi 411 V KH'M nml 'I:I'.I'M In ||ir> Minimi I iniii|>,r>, llnnin 412 •Rl'onintetl by lli« filiulriil I'li^rnnunlng llnanl Njiiiltnuirtl l»y Ilit* filiulrnl l'ttfp,l.1tMtMliif> lltiiMil- March 31,1993 - CLC Observer - Page 11 ARTS ^ contract with a major label; a notorious name. U pStr Could world domination for the Butthole Surfers be far behind? Read on. By Brian Hayes "If a band named the Butthole to the studio to produce the new al- Surfers starts to sell 20 million bum. records then there is something ter- "We offered sacrifices to Satan and ribly wrong with this society," said sold our souls to the devil and John the Surfers' drummer, King Coffey. Paul Jones magically appeared," "I mean, itjeither means that we've Coffey said. "But he drinks really foul sold out terribly or else we're cor- herbal tea and I don't know what's in rupting the system." the tea but he has some kind of weird Coffey shouldn' t worry too much herbal breath in thejnoming." about being legends in the music Despite his persistent odor, Jones world. That could never happen for hit it off with the Surfers and taught these punk cowboys from Texas. them a thing or two about being a rock They won't let it happen — they star. "I understand why you have old don't want to conform to any of the rock stars after talking with Jones," usual business standards. Coffey said," because say you are in But having signed up with Capi- a rock band and you enjoy what you tol Records after years of indie do. What are you supposed to do imprisonment, the Surfers don't ex- when you get old? Quit and do some- actly seem to be running from the thing that you hate?" establishment. In addition, their Could it be that the Buttholes are major label debut, Independani maturing? Actually thinking of the Worm Saloon, was produced by future? Have they finally reached their business biggie, Led Zeppelin bass- lifelong goal to be successful and ac- ist John Paul Jones. cepted in the music industry? Over the past 12 years, the "Yeah. Of course," Coffey said. Butthole Surfers have toured exces- "That's why we named ourselves the sively, bringing their circus like Butthole Surfers." • shows complete with retinal damag- As for the future, the Surfers al- ing strobe lights to wherever they ready have plans for a tour and a new weren't wanted. Some of the shows album. included appearances by their musi- "We're going to play more of like cal mascot, a pit, bull named after Butthole Surfers: (from left) Gibby Haynes, King Coffey, Paul Leary and visual images and we are totally go- Mark Fanner, a Capitol artist. Jeff Pinkus (and friends Mole and Mr. Lincoln) ing to rip pffU2," Coffey said.'"We're going to But the dog's not the only one with have our Butt TV." album "Fuck" and put a picture of a naked ' Sales," and the "Annoying Song" are just a few a weird name, obviously. And if. you think The concept for the next album? A tribute to woman on the cover we would be free to do so," titles of the 17 songs off the new album. Butthole Surfers is a little odd, then consider the Frank Sinatra and other labelmates Dean Martin Coffey said, speaking from his'home in Austin Haynes' lyrics are rambling, mostly sponta- other monikers they almost chose: the Dick and Grand Funk Railroad, according to Coffey. Texas. "Fortunately, we didn't take bis advice." neously prose that are so ridiculous, they're Clark Five; Vodka Family Winstons; Nine Foot "I hear that there is some Frank Sinatra For the co ver art they settled upon a montage Worm Makes Own Food, and Astray Baby funny. tribute album coming out and really that's the of pictures from lead singer Gibby Haynes'book Heads. h "The ^Annoying Song', grew out of this two main reason we decided to go with Capitol," he on tropical diseases. It was either that, Coffey Independent Worm Saloon has a more pol- dollar megaphone toy that Gibby got at said. "And when you go to Capitol, there's this said, or go with their first idea of a picture of a ished sound than previous albums Locust Abor- Toys'R'Us which makes your voice sound like huge, amazing portrait of Sinatra that all you bunch of worms sitting at a bar. tion Technician and Brown Reason To Live, but a robot," Coffey said. "He was going around could do is kneel down and light incense to offer Coffey insists it was notbecauseof any pressure The new album is slightly harder-edged than terrorizing us all with this mindless rant, so we from the label. In fact, the band actually man- their previous punkish releases, but it still exudes gave it a beat and it became a song." Haynes thanks and praise." And just like Ol' Blue Eyes, the Buttholes aged to convince Capitol to give them complete their trademark style which includes great songs hated the song, hence its name. can always claim they did it their way. They have artistic control. with lyrics, and titles which they say makes no The Butthole Surfers managed to persuade so far, at least. "The president of Capitol, who came to all of sense at all. "Che win' George Lucas Chocolate," rock legend Jones to bring his years of musical our shows, told us that if we wanted to call the "Dog Inside My Body," "Dispute over T-Shirt experience, laid-back style and distinctive odor Review Nanci Griffith and friends give new sound to old songs Folk Queen at Carnegie Hallos they try to keep folk alive.

By Brian Hayes tribute album. went into music was listening to Hester on her to undertake this project of documenting her The "Other Voices, Other Rooms" Tour. That The 77iw is your life, Nanci Griffith theme was transistor radio), left the audience silent after she folk history. Last New Year's Eve, Griffith and might have been what it said on the playbill for kept alive by supporting act. Iris De Ment, who finished singing Dylan's "Boots of Spanish Emmylou Harris were speaking of the beauty Nanci Griffith's concert that two-stepped into Griffith likened to the image of her younger self. Leather" with Griffith and De Ment and clarity of Wolfs Carnegie Hall last De Ment with her high twangy voice, humorous John Gorka, part of the rising new folk move- music. Both were Thursday, but the con- exposition, and downright innocent appeal gives ment, came out to sing "Gypsy Life" off of his saddened that, since cert, which showcased truth to the statement. In fact, it was one of new album, Temporary Road with Griffith on Wolfs death a few the singer's passionate Griffith's shows which inspired De Ment to back-up. years ago, the songs blend of folk/country pursue a musical career. The audience embraced Other standouts were "This Old Town," which were losing their im- music, also included and her with applause as she playfully ran offstage in Griffith sang with Janis Ian; "Three Flights Up," portance among a host of famous folk tears of joy. They had seen the spirit and wit of with Fletcher Christian, and John Prine's "Speed today's new artists musicians, causing Nanci onstage in De Ment, but were obviously of the Sound of Loneliness." and listeners. many to think up new anxious for the real Nanci Griffith. Looking like a closing jam at an inductee "Songs need new tour names. Soon the Austin, Texas native came out on ceremony at the Rock V Roll hall of fame, the voices to sing them "You know what stage and, flanked by her veteran Blue Moon stage was filled during the encores with everyone in places they've she's doing up here," Orchestra, opened up the show with 'Trouble in who was waiting backstage to pay tribute to never been sung be- said one legend, Carolyn the Fields," "Outbound Plane" and "It's A Hard Griffith. Grammy winning songwriter Julie Gold fore in order to stay Hester as she stood on Life." In between songs she delighted and amused ("From a Distance"), Odetta, Griffith's dad, The alive," reads the stage next to the tall and the audience by explaining the songs via south- Blue Moon Orchestra, Harris and all the other album's liner notes. timid Griffith. "Wel- erly-slanted anecdotes. And Griffith's feeble at- guest singers came out together to sing a power- So Griffith selected come to the First Annual tempts at the trademark Pete Townsend jumps ful rendition of the traditional folk song a few songs that rep- Nanci Griffith Folk Fes- along were worth the price of admission, her frail "Wimoweh." resented various tival at Carnegie Hall." frame jumping up with guitar in hand and land- Lead by Odetta on vocals everyone huddled stages in her folk his- The mixed audience of ing like a feather at tho songs' endings. around the mikes to sing the classic made famous tory. Griffith enlisted yuppies and cowboys re- Nanci Griffith But tho concert soon became a show in a show by Pete Sccgcr and the Weavers. Griffith stood singers and musi- sponded in applause and when tho various guests came out on stage to center stage with her dad, tears welling up in her cians such as folk screams of "yahoo." lend a voice for each song. Emmylou Harris eyes. Tho tour supports Griffith's debut on Elcktra greats Carolyn Hester, Odetta, Guy Clark, the came out, surprising the audience, to sing with After the stage was cleared Griffith came back Records, Other Rooms, Other Voices, her lentil IndigoOirls, Dylan, Chct Atkins and new voices Griffith on Kate Wolfs "Across The Great Di- for two more songs, One,"This Heart," a new collection of songs to date. This latest one Is, in Iris Do Mcnt and Lee Suttcrficld, to help pre- vide" and with Griffith's longtime friend and Buddy Holly-influenced song rocked through essence, a musical biography of Griffith's life, It serve and restore each song. piano player, James Hooker, on "Gold Coast tho grand concert hall. is comprised of the folk songs and artists whom The show tt Carnegie Hall reunited many of Highway." ("When ho retires," Griffith said," I Tho mood was quickly brought down when influenced and shaped her life at n linger/ the Album's contributor! onstage to sing and will retire because I can not continue without Griffith told the audience that she would love tho songwriter. Bob Dylan, John Prine, Gordon perform their part*. They also came to pay him.") For Hooker, who has the look of a next song, her own 'It's A Hard Life," to be Lightfoot, Woody Outline, and Kate Wolf are tribute to Griffith, who Is celebrating her fif- frumpy, balding man but the voice of Ray Charles, covered by some new folk artist 20 years from JUKI a few of the artists Included on (he 17-itong teenth year in tho music business, during which the duct was the chance to sing with one of his down tho road. CD. time lite wrote ninny classics of her own which favorite singers, Harris. A gift from Griffith, Judging by the amount of respect Mho already It WM (ho music of Wolf (hat umpired Griffith could very well be included on torn* future Carolyn Hester, (one of the reason* Griffith has In the business, that shouldn't be impossible. Page 12 - CLC Observer - March 31, 1993 ARTS Chilliwack's finest: Mystery Machine

So now, / will mface my comparison. it," explains Bean Ward. "Those who aren't, Picture, if you can, a man — make it Rod wont." Sterling. No wait — make it George Bush and In response to my question of their favorite Pat Buchanan as one guy: George Buchanan. odor, they cited marijuana as their favorite, Put him in the middle of a quiet highway closely followed by hashish and the somewhere in Arizona — surrounded by "rejuvenating smell of new hockey equipment. nothing but desert and windmill power The fifty minute album is no let down generators. George Buchanan is slowly though, believe you me. With the dirty crunch walking in the middle of the highway towards fuzz of Sonic Youth and the who-gives-a-shit- a clay-like mountain. The wind gales by as an anyway Marc Arm vocal apathy, 'all of the iguana hides behind a cactus. The sun is setting songs are°on the mark. The third track, "Valley a majestic violet. A faint sound of amp Song," would have to take the proverbial cake feedback and rusty engine is heard in the for me. With its blissfully harmonious bassline distance and crescendos, when emerges the van and loud periods of brief anarchy sandwiched from Scooby Doo out of nowhere. Speeding between soft vocals and light strums, the sound out of control, the music-van becomes too loud is the musical equivalent of an insane person and piercing. George Buchanan turns around running naked through the streets of New York with his hands covering his ears just as he screaming, stopping abruptly to have a short becomes a worthless piece of political road- and deep conversation with a passerby, then pizza. The speedy van journeys towards the running and screaming again. clay-like mountain and the violet fades to "The secret to that is the Boss darkness, leaving a trail of marijuana smoke Superfeedback guitar pedal — it lays waste," and the odor of Patchouli incense. That is what says Bean ward. Mystery Machine sounds like. Another secret to the uniquely brilliant While being huge hockey fans, we quibbled sound might be the beer Canadians call "Hi- briefly on the fates of the Cannucks and the test," appropriately named after a type of Rangers. "What do you think about a Mike gasoline. "Five point six-five alcohol content Richter trade," they ask me. got us through everything," says Bean Ward. "I "I always liked the 'Beezer' myself, so I'd think we were stoned throughout the entire support it," I respond. recording process. Drink eight or nine Hi-tests "Cool," they say. and you're flat on your back for the rest of the There are many drug innuendoes and blatant night" references on their new Nettwerk Records Does anyone know a good importing release Glazed. company? "The people that are into it will understand

Mystery Machine: (from left) Bean, with cap, Coming next issue: Jordan Pratt, Shane Ward and Luke Rogalsky By Adam C. Wolvek -Johnny Depp on his new film, What goes glub-glub, makes an inhalation city of Chilliwack, British Columbia noise, pauses, wipes some drool off its shirt,, (population 45,000.) Many jokes have been Benny and Joon; picks up a guitar and revolutionizes the told about this innocent Northwestern town Northeast's view of the Northwest? No, not the (but the, rumors of the name origin stemming city of Eugene, Oregon -it's the Vancouver- from an incident with a masturbator and a based Mystery Machine. And who is Mystery Mexican beef and bean dish are false.) Sixty Machine and what do they want from us? How miles east of Vancouver, Chilliwack, like any -An interview with theater's can we overcome our sudden distaste and other suburban place, is filled with churches, slight loathing for Seattle and that top left restaurants, and gas stations. Blue Man Group corner of the U.S. map? Why am I asking you? Shane Ward and vocalist/guitarist Luke You can't answer me. At least right now you , Rogalsky (19) started playing together in their can't. I mean, look, you're sitting there with this early teens when they realized that "real jobs paper in your hand, attracted by a "neat-o" were simply not an option." Meanwhile Bean picture of four guys who look like Luke and drummer Jordan Pratt (21) had the same Skywalker, a goat, and half of Pearl Jam - you epiphany while playing in numerous high have nothing better to do with your time than school bands. The four got together in the N E W Y O R K U N 1 V E R S 1 T Y to read about some band you've never heard of. warmer months of 1990. Soon thereafter, they Why should you keep on reading? (Read on released their demo S meg ma which won a T 1 S C H s C H O O L O F T H E A R T S and you shall soon find out.) local band competition sponsored by some N T E O F F 1 L M It was another one of those college band college radio station up there in Canada. With 1 s 1 T IJ1 T conference calls where ten or more people chill the prize of free studio time, they recorded a AND T E L E V 1 S 1 O N on one line and ask five questions each. I was seven song album with producer Dave "Rave" speaking to bassist Shane Ward (21), and Ogilve (Skinny Puppy, Babes in Toyland.) guitarist Bean (also 21) and it was quite Shortly after they played gigs with Pearl Jam, PRESENT! THE Slit ANNUAL difficult to differentiate voices between the Buffalo Tom, and appeared on the second stage two, so from here on in, I will refer to all at Lollapalooza '92. quotes as being said by Bean Ward. But first, Enough of that stuff. some background, if you will. "Wide and varied comparisons are They're not actually from Vancouver. (I just annoying," replied Bean Ward. "We've been said that so you'd think they were cooler. compared to Swervedriver, Dinosaur Jr. to Because Vancouver just has that reputation, Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin." right?) Mystery Machine were spawned in the

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NEW YORK CITY Cost: $2100.00 Deposit: $500 First come first served. General Meeting: Mon., April 19,5:30 p.m.; Room SL-34 TICKITS. $6 GINiRAL PUBLIC; $4 WITH STUDINT ID FOR MORI INFORMATION, PLIASI CALL (212) 998-1795. Call: Dr. Joseph Pcrricone: 212-636-6247; 212-636-6381 NfeW YortH i t iitj! f f ifjt* Mr uf ION March 31,1993 - CLC Observer - Page 13 ARTS Facing the Music: dishing and dissing the latest discs By Adam C. Wolvek Yes, I have reached the bowels of The opening tune, "Yip Song," featuring narcissism and have created |he "Adam C. Wolvek Head Rating System". Robyn saying "yip" repeatedly to a fast beat, Hypothetically, if I had to trade my own made me honestly want to shoot myself. But as head for an album, I'd be picky in my that song ended, everything got much better. choicemaking. Listening to an album after Perfectly beautiful harmonies are sung on songs I've given away my head would pose a such as "Railway Shoes" and "Driving Aloud." problem, but now, at least, you know what The Lady Waters type of storytelling is once 1 look like. It's all very surreal, isn't it? again revived on the cut "Serpent At The G ates The system is as follows: 1 Adam - poor; of Wisdom," and with a glass jug, a drum, and 2 Adams - bearable/fair; 3 Adams - very a cheese "grater, the last song, "Wafflehead," good; 4 Adams - excellent; 5 Adams - gives Respect the blatant sexual metaphor that flawless classic. is the signature of almost every Robyn album. To the virgin Robyn Hitchcock listener: Hey, what can I say ? Buy the album. If you like it, keep it. If you don't like it, break it and try to get the record store to refund your money. To the advanced Robyn listener: This is much better than Perspex Island but not as good as Element of Light.

No Cure For Cancer Pond Denis Leary Pond A&MRecords Subpop Records

This Portland trio whirls themselves into a I laughed and I shuddered. Denis Leary, deeeeeeep trance-like musical tornado and we, eating up the media attention like a shark with its the college public, are lucky enough to be alive mouth wide open gathering whatever falls in its and on this planet to hear it. This debut is path, has arrived. First the Showtime special. absolutely brilliant and wonderful to experi- Then the Doubleday book. Now the album. ence. This album coined the phrase "noctur- Unfortunately, for anyone who watched the spe- i • ; | - rr- fl 1/2 nal" as it has many songs about sleeping and cial or even Comedy Central's London Under- waking up. As a teeny-bopper in the fifties ground program (which Leary hosted for a sea- would describe: "these guys are so dreamy." son), there's really nothing new here. Fuzzy Leary on having a keg party with Barry Grant Lee Buffalo Manilow: "You write the songs, we'll drink the beer out of your head." Leary rants and raves Slash Records about drugs, smoking, smoking, drugs, meat-

0 eating, smoking, drugs, and smoking. Four cuts Strong acoustic debut in a, for lack of a better are actually songs, and not bad ones. His band, artist, Tom Petty sort of way. The album Fuzzy The Clams, and their first single, "Asshole", are sounds as if Jim Croce was reincarnated into Cat sure to amuse many. Stevens who just happened to take a sip of beer On "Asshole," which now plays regularly on from the mug of a lethargic and slightly angry MTV, Leary, spewing rhetoric on driving in a Beaiiflu Edie Brickell. , convertible eating McDonald's burgers, says: Bone Club Grant Lee Philips, not only two-thirds of the "I'm gonna wipe my mouth with the American Imago Records band's name, but the singer/guitarist, possesses flag and then I'm gonna toss the Styrofoam the same high note, off-pitch vibrato quality container right out the side and there ain't a present in John Lennon and Robyn Hitchcock. goddamned thing anybody could do about it, you All of the songs are pretty much hard and The lyrics, however, leave a little to be desired. know why? Because we got the bombs, that's straight-forward but maybe I got a bad recording Lines such as "I hear America snoring" bring to why." or something, because I felt like I could hear the mind old Studs Terkel material. Not bad on the whole, but I'd invest in the studio, (as my friend Pete always says.) I really This is the tape for your rooftop campfire in cassette instead of the CD. did though. It was a little dry in some places and the middle of Manhattan. The tape you crave as juicy in others. All in all, not a bad effort. you drive in the country, in the summertime at 3 ajn. In a time of grunge and heavy distortion, Fuzzy is anything but fuzzy.

Straight Out Of Ireland Various Artists Seoul Brothers Records

Forget about U2, Sinead O'Connor, The Pogues, and Hothouse Flowers for now. And totally disregard House of Pain and Black 47. This comp features eleven bands, all really from Ireland, dripping with rain, stammering through foggy hazes, ripping tunes very reminiscent of The Committments, Del Amitri, and new 10,000 Maniacs (although they're not Irish.) Being that St. Patrick's Day has come and gone once again, I sadly believe that these bands will as well. Worth mentioning: Straight out of Donaghnede, the band LJr dropped a gem in the middle of the album with "In A Day," aplanojutd Dunn Duran string acoustic number with a little bit or the Respect Dunn Dunn Jo In Nine G Hell Capitol Records "Death of a Disco Dancer" bast line. Robyn Hitchcock & The Egyptians Hair and Skin Trading Company The Fatima Maiwioni close the album with A A M Records Beggars Banquet "Valley of Dead Cars," a jumpy, Jane-will-you- Oh boy. They really lost me when they turned i top-this -crazy-thing type «ong.Not bad if you're These guys are probably in my top 15 favorite the Velvet Underground song "Pemme Fatale" Featuring the ex-members of Loop, this al- on crack. groups of all lime, yet not since "Balloon Man" into a happy, cheery dance number. It was bad bum l» • mixture of Ride, Carnival Art, ifrango The bulk of the album is essentially acousti- and "Madonna of the Waips" have they written a enough when RBM covered it, I must admit, techno on some track*, and the usual pseudo- cally bated but I found that the songs were • little song that stays in your head and beats you up the when I wus younger, way back there in fourth grungo coming out of England these days. On too happy and contained enough sax to put tkklle whole day until you get home, cry uncle, and play grade, I liked theso guys. But between Simon the whole, it's not bad, but because the mimic and The Cruinen to nhaino, Basically, if you own it. Rtipect is good though -- don't get mo wrong. taBon's feeble, off-pitch singing and the plastic Kyle change* drastically from one «ong to an- anything new by Paul McCartney, Peter Qabriel, It's typical Robyn and the Egyptians with Robyn RMI'-IIke quality of the album, these glamour other and back, its hard to know if you are Paul Simon or any of thoie old rockers who've sounding a lot lets like Syd Barrett u each album guyi of Croat Britain failed to record an album listening to the same band. released new and feeblesingle*,you'llenjoy this. iibirthed. that a!d« In food digestion, (Sorry Lori.) Page 14 - CLC Observer -March 31,1993 ARTS AIDS benefit celebrates dance class offered life through song Students take advantage of Ailey/CLC alliance

By Martin Bland A variety of dance courses are presently to be and there are some people in the class who being offered for academic credit to Fordham are very good and I think I'm pretty good too." students for the first time ever at the nearby Another CLC senior enrolled in the program, Alvin Ailey American Dance Center. The theater major Nicole Byrl, says she enjoys the courses are a part of a new exchange program relaxed atmosphere of her Ballet I class. which also gives Ailey students the opportunity "I don't feel that the classes are competitive to take academic classes at the College at Lin- at all or that people are in class to impress others, coln Center while they pursue a dance career. but just to work at their own pace," Byrl says, CLC students can choose from two levels of wiping her brow before sipping her bottled ballet (Ballet I, II, beginning and intermediate); water. "As a theater person interacting with the three different styles of modern dance tech- dance, it should be an unintimidating experi- niques (Horton I, Modern I, Dunham I, II); jazz ence." dance technique (levels I, II); a course in dance Francesca Sale, a CLC junior who had just history; a course in dance improvisation for exited the ballet class with Byrl, agreed. A would-be choreographers, and a course entitled, practicing dancer for the past two years. Sale 'Music for Dancers." says she finds the CLC-Ailey arrangement per- But students considering enrolling in a dance fectly suited to her career goal of becoming a class for the Fall 1993 semester are warned that professional dancer. an additional, $75 administrative fee to the "Once you get used to it, it's fine," Sale says Ailey school for course evaluation is required, of her class. "But it could prove intimidating if dance composition (improvisation) class. Smith you don't feel confident But that's exactly says her class is very large and mostly com- what the discipline of dance does. It helps build prised of "traditional dance students" and self confidence." younger, college-aged students. This initially Both Byrl and Sale agree that the instructors worried Smith, who takes the class for enjoy- at the Ailey school are non-intimidating, excel- Some of the featured performers from In Celebration of Life 2: (Front ment as well as the credit lent professionals and only regret that the alli- row) Terri Klausner, Billy Porter, Nancy LaMott, Rosemary Loar. (Back ance was not established earlier in their Fordham Row) Donna Murphy, Marni Nixon, Francis Ruivivar. careers. They say they hope the program is "I don't feel that the classes are expanded in the future, with perhaps a dance major or minor being added to the CLC degree By Peter Katucki competitive at all or that people program. According to Roger Mclntyre, CLC In a sea of red ribbons, wbat distinguishes In and the cooperation has been notable. "There's a Adult Admissions Director and the liason be- Celebration of Life 2 from other AIDS benefits lot of divas in the group, as in any group of are in class to impress others, tween the two school, the program, as it is now, is that this evening of music, sponsored by two singers or songwriters," said Znidarsic. "But but just to work at their own is "permanent" New York-based AIDS charities, will showcase there's never been a problem with anyone. pace." new songs sung by Broadway and cabaret They're all willing to rehearse whenever I need illuminaries written specifically for this event them. They're willing to write to make it all come classes available: by up-ami-coming composers and lyricists. alive. That's they only way the AIDS virus is "I was very surprised when I attended the class The annual concert is the brainchild of John F. going to be conquered, the only way the theater Kcause I expected to see a lot of older students Znidarsic, producing director of Arts and Artists will move on." here," Smith says. "But I was toe oldest, with the at St Paul's Roman Catholic Church. More than Some of the contributing composers and lyri- »xceptioh of the instructor. In my first clasg>I was Ballet I, II; Jazz I, II; a year ago, Znidarsic asked composers and cists include Stephen Flaherty and Lynn Abrens, errified. But by the second class I was more Horton I; Modern I; lyricists to write songs for the first event last . who wrote Once On This Island; Danny Troob jonfident" year to benefit The Momentum Project, (a non- and David Fjiedman who have worked on Disney Smith adds that her teacher is patient and "not Dance History; Dance profit organization that provides nutrition and movies Beauty and The Beast and Aladdin, is concerned with technique as she is with art- Improvisation and Music counseling for people with HIV infection and (Friedman is Kathie Lee Gif ford's musical direc- stry, creativity and freedom of movement You AIDS)andBroadwayCares/Equity Fights AIDS, tor as well); and composer Skip Kennon and ire completely free to be as creative as you want for Dancers (a nonprofit fundraising organization that pro- lyricist Ellen Fitzhugh, who have collaborated vides grants to healthcare organizations such as on a song written for Donna Murphy who last AIDS hospices and other services to Equity year starred in the off-Broadway bit Song of Union Members.) Singapore.. (On the wall of Znidarsic's office is a letter from Stephen Sondheim replying to his "A lot of the AIDS benefits have a tendency to invitation '"Thank you, but I can't this year'," be rather dark," said Znidarsic, "The whole key said Father Harris.) A defense against cancer can be to this concert was to write new music and if I said, 'write music for an AIDS benefit', people ' Among those performers sharing the spotlight. cooked up in your kitchen. would tend to write all dark, depressing songs. with the composers are Stephen Bogardus, who There is evidence that Because I did not want that to be the case, we is currently starring in Falsettos; cabaret singers diet and cancer are related. and sisters Ann Hampton Callaway and Liz Follow these modifica- made it In Celebration of Life, using the AIDS tions in your daily diet to thing as a backdrop." Callaway; Tony award winner Helen Gallagher, also known for her years on television soap luce chances of getting "The flip side [to the AIDS crisis] is that a lot icer: opera, Ryan's Hope; Jeff Hamer, who frequently of people who are living with AIDS are really 1. Eat more high-fiber living and are doing things in their lives as a performs at the Algonquin Room; and Marni Nixon who dubbed the singing of Deborah Kerr foods such as fruits and result of having contracted the virus that they vegetables and whole- probably would never otherwise have done," in The King and I, Natalie Wood in West Side grain cereals. said Father Steven Harris, a Paulist priest and Story', and Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady. These and other performers will be joined by the 2. Include dark green and co-producer and co-director of the benefit. "We deep yellow fruits and veg- thought if we're going to have an evening of Anerican Ballroom Theatre Co.; jazz group, The etables rich In vitamins A music, it's got to lift people's spirits," he said. ' Tonics; the entire cast of the off-Broadway show and C. All the songs are about life and living, some Wings; and the New York City Gay Men's Cho- 3. Include cabbage, broc- deal directly with AIDS. Terri Klausner will rus Chamber Choir. coli, brussels sprouts, kohl- close the first act with a song called "It Looks Underscoring the fact that this concert is being rabi and cauliflower. Like Life To Me," written by Steve Marzullo produced and performed in a Catholic church, 4. Be moderate in con- and lyrics by David Cady. "In the gentle touch Father Harris said, "lean sit here and tell you how sumption of salt-cured, of a lover's kissfm things like this/it looks like muchldisagrcewithCardinalJohnO'Connoron smoked, and nitrkc-cured life to me/I know tomorrow may be hard to face/ so many things which I think are overblown. I'm foods. but this alone I guarantee/beneath the tarnish of proud of the community at St. Paul's that we can 5. Cut down on total fat this tired place/a better world will come to be," put aside our baggage." Intake from animal sources Cady writes "The word catholic does not mean universal and fats and oils. All of the debuting songs of In Celebration of (or) non exclusionary," said Znidarsic, "this con- 6. Avoid obesity. L(fe 2 have been written for a particular cert IK bridging worldN." 7. Ik-moderate In con- performer's voico and personality. Father Har- "You can preach it but you have to put it in to sumption of alcoholic ris is delighted with the creative process. "I'll practice," said Father llarrlN. beverages. come into John's office and he'll put on the In Celebration of Life 2 can be enjoyed on April speaker phone and a composer will be at home 4th at 8pm in (ha great space of the nco-gothic at Iho piano playing Komclhing new asking, church of St. Paul the Apostle on Ninth Avenue 'What do you think or thin' or they'll fax the between 5!)lh and (iOlh directs, Ticket* are $25 lyric* mid ask 'Do you Ihluk Helen Gulluglwr which includes a reception following the con- Will like itils'," Hauls mild. cert. Proceed* licncfit Broadway Carcs/Iiqulty I'lghlH AIDS and llic Momentum Project, Lnst More (him one hundred artists arc donating year's concert ruined $I2,(KK), lfor reservations Ihclr Iline, talent, mid eniiipiiKsli MI lollie concert. iall(2l2)(>7H'>WO. March 31, 1993 - CLC Observer - Page 15 ARTS Review No hope in new Whitney exhibit

By Beth Karp "Not welcome: White, straight male men responsibility. It is easy to show what is wrong over 35" is the message that echoes throughout with society; the challenge, however, lies in the the Whitney Museum of American Art's" 1993 ability to change it. Biennial Exhibition," on view through June 20. The true measure of great art is that at first it But there is a catch line: "Just send money, can be shocking, but you are drawn to it over because the Museum wouldn't be here without and over again, always learning something you." new each time. So, I decided to test this theory After you purchase your ticket, the fellow and went back to see the Biennial for a second behind the counter gives you a pin to wear. time. But still, I felt nothing; only hype. Even (Mine said, "I can't imagine ever wanting to be the few interesting pieces become overshad- white.") Welcome to the Whitney's version of owed by sholck. a multi-cultural roller coaster, a horror which is Who is this exhibition targeted for? Every- especially meant to insult anyone who reads the one I know has been confronted with homeless Wall Street Journal. I walked out of the exhibi- people. I have friends who have watched help- tion a while later feeling numb and devoid of lessly as our loved ones died of AIDS. All of any hope for the future. America has experienced the LA riots on live Guided for the first time by a single curatorial TV. perspective, the Biennial exploits such issues as But there is hope, through it all, isn't there? sexuality, violence, race, and gender in its at- Why else would we keep going? Charity tempt to present, as they say, "the best new fundraising events are to the nineties as single work." bars were to the 1980s. People in their twenties 1 I am not going to belittle my art history and early thirties want action. We have moved Pat Ward Williams What You background by reviewing the works because away from the age of excess and have become Lookn At, 1992 (top) and Robert they seem almost inconsequential in the larger infused with a new sense of optimism for the Gober's Newspaper, 1992 (left), future. We as Americans are yearning for things picture of what is really disturbing with this two of the works on display in exhibition. I firmly believe that choosing artists to believe in. This is the same spirit that put solely on their race and gender is wrong. It is Clinton in the White House. the Whitney Museum's 1993 called politically correct quotas. Instead of cel- However, there is no sense of any hope or, Biennial Exhibition, on display ebrating and learning about other cultures, this for that matter, any reason to keep on living now through June. show separates and divides people even further. that can be found in this Biennial. Has the curatorial staff been out of the country for the Not only does this Biennial want to shock you past year? What is missing from the show is with works that range from Cindy Sherman's humor and wit, two elements that are essential grotesque images of mannequins in S&M pos- when times are bad. Photos couriety the Whitney Museum ses to George Holliday's tape of the Rodney So in closing, I direct this Question to direc- King beating, but they do so without any social tor david Ross, "I believe in a place called Hope, do you?" '

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(212) 246-5756 Page 16 - CLC Observer - March 31,1993 SPORTS

CAN THE GREAT ELECTROLYSIS SIENNA BARBARA LEIBOWITZ AMERICAN PASTTIME 50 West 34th Street (Room 16A6) The McAlpin House SINKS (across from Macy's) New York N.Y. 10001 BESAVED? 239-0783 RAMS member AMERICAN ELECTROLOGY ASSOCIATION NEW YORK ELECTROLYSISASSOCIATION By John Cummlngs RUGBY also INTERNATIONAL GUILD OF It seems today, as if every sports minded person that short right field?" I can dream about it, but I PROFESSIONAL ELECTROLOGISTS has an opinion on what is wrong with "The Great don't really want to know. ByJP American Pastime", baseball. What'seven worse, Let's get to the real issue, here. Since the advent strict sterilization procedures is that everyone also has an idea on how to fix it. of large network contracts, baseball has become," Although starters Rod Murphy and Aaron observed safe-comfortable-permanent results " The games are too long!" "They start too late!" primarily, a night time sport. I couldn't tell you LaFortune were out with leg injuries and the computerized multiple galvanic method "Its too expensive to go!" "The players make too the last World Series game played in the after- conditions were so bad that Fordham was unable referred by physicians much money I" All are legitimate complaints, but noon. What has happened to baseball, is that, to get the goal to stay up, the ruggers came out specializing in both problem and cosmetic cases if you addressed and corrected them, would the due to poor scheduling, and even poorer promo- strong in their first game of the season against SPECIAL OFFER people come back, not just to the park, but to the tion, they've lost an en tire generation of fans. Ask Sienna. 1/2 PRICE OFF FIRST television as well? I think not! any fifth grader who the starting rotation of the The team had only been practicing for a short 1/2 HOUR TREATMENT The baseball owners met in Phoenix, Arizona in Yankees is, and you'll get a blank stare, but ask time before their first match and the horrible field early March, to discuss the seeming decline in the him to name someone on the Chicago Bulls be- conditions only added to their sloppy play. The REG. $40.00 popularity of baseball. sides Michael Jordan, and he' 11 name everyone on many attempts by Fordham to score a try failed as Along with speeding up the games, by enforc- the Chicago Bulls besides Michael Jordan. the game slowly moved onward. Both Fordham's ing the already existing 20 second time limit Sometime this summer, drive around the neigh- and Sienna's backs seemed incapable of holding between pitches, and 90 second limit between borhoods of New York City. For the most part, onto the ball and moving it forward. innings, in addition to enforcing the real strike you'll see people, basketball in band, waiting their By the end of the first half, the only thing either zone, the owners are leading towards changes that turn to play for the court. Contrast that to the team had successfully accomplished was getting CLASSIFIEDS make baseball traditionalists cringe. empty, dustbowl baseball fields that fill the city, dirty. Neither team scored or even came close to Expansion, realignment, and (perish the thought) and you'll seethat the owners that dominate this scoring. There were a few good attempts by both Want to improve essential MATE interleague play were the remedies that came out and many others.see that the owners are directing teams but no one player or play stood out. That skills? oftheownersmeetingoftheminds. Yeah [That's their attentions in the wrong direction. would change in the second half, but not for the ticket! (apologies to Jon Lovitz) Huh??? It wouldn't take much for the owners of each Fordham. Let this experienced, reliable tutoi People are already losing interest in, what is franchise to get involved directly (and I mean Getting back into the game, the beginning of the show you how. All levels of math. viewed by many to be a watered down product as directly) in promoting inner cith baseball. For the second half showed some potential for the Rams. One on one or small group tutoring. it is, so let's add more teams, change the divisons price of a decent utility infielder, and a good set- Both teams were playing tough, and Fordham to confuse the fans who are still hanging on, and up man (about 3 Million Dollars per yeat. Major went out there looking for the first score of the Available at reasonable rates. I come let's let everybody play everybody! No wonder League Baseball could plant seeds in each of the game by either team, but it wouldn't happen. A to you. Call Tuti at 212-642-8108. the game is in trouble! 28 major league cities, and their surrounding Sienna back, after recovering the ball from a line First, chances are, after you see the pitching areas, from which they could reapfthe harvests out, managed to break one tackle then run ap- staffs the Colorado Rockies and the Florida Mar- from for years to come. proximately twenty yards almost untouched for lins put together for this year's expansion teams, The money could be uscJ to build new fields, the first try of the game. Sienna went on to score SEE JANE TALK. you'll get the idea that there's already not enough repair the existing dilapidated ones, buy some again and with both extra points successful, Si- talent to go around. The only way that will change uniforms, and maybe even the player* could get enna won the game by a score of 14 - 0. Both teams Be in the audience of the new "JANE depends on the health and well-being of Fidel involved on some level. Think of the thrill young- played well but Sienna just had what it took that PRATT' SHOW on LIFETIME. Castro, and whether or not Cuba opens itsdoors.in sters could receive by playing for the Mott Haven day to take home a win. For FREE tickets call Allyson at the next five or ten years. Junior Yankees, or the Maspeth Junior Mets. And Fordham looks forward to playing Catholic As for the idea of realignment, it really doesn't if the owners can't identify with that, they could 718-706-5273. work unless baseball expands, so if I won't dis- surely identify with the great public relations University on the weekend of April 3. cuss expansion, I can't discuss realignment. attention they would receive. List, and certainly not least, the thought of It is time for the baseball owners to wake up and MODELS! STOP INTERNA- interleague play makes a baseball purists skin address the real problem et hand. It is not the lack crawl. Those in favor say it would make for great of excitement that plagues baseball. Ii is no: the TIONAL SCOUTS seeking new rivalries; The Yankees and The Mets, The White lack of rivalries. It is not the big salaries. What faces for placement with majormodel Sox and The Cubs. These rivalries don't already does plague baseball is that the sport has lost an agencies for fashion, commercial exist? Besides, any fun baseball conversation usu- entire generation of fans, and if they lose another, ally starts with, "Do you know what would happen the plague might become fatal. print and runway. Call the Test Board if so and so got to play in Yankee Stadium with 212-986-8100.

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