The Unofficial Guide to Artemis Unofficially by Jazz
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THE UNOFFICIAL GUIDE TO ARTEMIS UNOFFICIALLY BY JAZZ BASHARA WHO DOESN’T LOVE A GLOSSARY? OKAY, I DON’T, BUT I FIGURE IF YOU DON’T KNOW ARTEMIS, SOMEBODY HAS TO BE YOUR GUIDE. THERE’S A LOT OF LINGO TO LEARN. CONSIDER THIS YOUR CHEAT SHEET, PLUS A MAP, SO YOU DON’T GET LOST. YOU’RE WELCOME. APOLLO 11/ 01.MAP OF ARTEMIS VISITOR CENTER Apollo 11 Visitor Center “Tourists love it. The half-hour train ride provides stunning views of the moon’s terrain, and the Visitor Center is a great place to look at the landing site without ever leaving pressure. And for those who do want to venture outside to get a better view, Dale and other EVA masters are ready to give them a tour.” MOLTKE ARTEMIS CRATER Conrad SMELTER / REACTORS “I live in Conrad Down 15, a grungy area MOLTKE fifteen floors underground in Conrad FOOTHILLS 20 Bubble. If my neighborhood were wine, connoisseurs would describe it as ‘sh*tty, MOLTKE A KM with overtones of failure and poor life decisions.’” ARTEMIS TO APOLLO 11 Aldrin CONRAD AIRLOCK VISITOR CENTER 40KM “Aldrin is the opposite of Conrad in every respect. Conrad’s full of plumbers, glass TRANQUILITY BAY blowers, metalworkers, welding shops, FREIGHT AIRLOCK CONRAD repair shops...the list goes on. But Aldrin is truly a resort. It has hotels, casinos, whorehouses, theaters, and even an ALDRIN honest-to-God park with real grass. Aldrin is the tourist center. Wealthy tourists BEAN from all over Earth come for two-week stays.” ARMSTRONG ISRO AIRLOCK Armstrong “Armstrong sucks. It’s a damn shame such an PORT OF ENTRY TRAIN STATION awesome guy got such a sh*tty part of town FREIGHT AIRLOCK named after him.” SHEPARD TO SMELTER & Armstrong is industry. The grinding thrum REACTORS of industrial equipment oozes from the 1KM walls along the old corridors. Shepard “Shepard is where wealthy Artemisians live. The hallways of Shepard feature wood TO ARTEMIS 1KM paneling and tasteful, noise-absorption carpeting. Chandeliers hang every twenty THE BERM REACTOR 1 REACTOR 2 meters to provide light.” SANCHEZ ALUMINUM SMELTER BUBBLE Really, really rich people here. Bean “Bean Bubble sits between Conrad and Shepard, both symbolically and geographically. It’d be my future home if all this scheming worked out...I could get TRAIN AIRLOCK a condo in Bean Bubble. A nice one with a living room, bedroom, bathroom, and its own shower. No more communal anything.” TO ARTEMIS 1KM 50 HEAT REJECTION PANELS SOLAR WIND COMPOSITION EVA AIRLOCK APOLLO 11 EAST DESCENT MODULE CRATER APOLLO 11 VISITOR CENTER PATHS TRAVERSED BY ARMSTRONG & ALDRIN PASSIVE SEISMIC TRAIN EXPERIMENT PACKAGE AIRLOCK 50 LASER RANGING RETROREFLECTOR TO ARTEMIS1KM 01 Canton, The—Five-star hotel in Aldrin 02.LINGO OF THE LAND Bubble that caters to the Chinese elite. Owned and operated by Hong Kong business Aldrin Bubble—See the map. interests, they provide a homelike experience to high-end travelers. Aldrin Park— Occupies the top four floors of Regolith—Thick layer of fine dust covering Aldrin Bubble. Instead of the Capsule Domicile, a.k.a. “Coffin”—Enclosed the lunar surface. Lunar dust is extremely everything-proof walls found around the bunk with a door that can lock. Used by bad to breathe. It’s made of teeny, tiny rest of the city, this area is protected by those who can’t afford a better living rocks, and there’s been no weather to ISRO—Short for Indian Space Research enormous panes of glass, which protects situation. Ahem. smooth them out. Each mote is a spiky, Organization. One of the organizations park-goers from the harsh radiation and UV barbed nightmare just waiting to tear up found on Space Agency Row in Armstrong that would otherwise roast you alive. The Connector—Large public passageway that your lungs. You’re better off smoking a Bubble. park’s design is simple and elegant. The links one Artemis bubble to another. pack of asbestos cigarettes than breathing circular grounds meet with glass walls. The that sh*t. KSC—Short for Kenya Space Corporation, the terrain is mostly flat with a few Conrad Bubble— See the map. megacorporation that owns, operates and artificial hills here and there, all Roosa—The largest spaceliner ever built, governs Artemis. covered in grass. Real, honest-to-God Conrad Down 15—Fifteen floors below ground with a 200-passenger capacity. Operates grass. That is no small achievement. level in Conrad Bubble; where I live, if between Earth and Artemis. Has full Ladies, The—Two statues standing in Aldrin you can call it living. centripetal gravity, with a radius large Park beneath a sculpture of a cinnamon Aluminum Droplet of Doom— Blob of molten enough that no one will get dizzy. It even tree. One was Chang’e, the Chinese goddess metal produced by welding. Could Crafters Row—Located in Conrad Down 6 helps people adjust to lunar gravity. They of the moon. The other was Artemis, the potentially burn through an EVA suit and (six floors below ground level in Conrad gradually slow the rotation over the Greek goddess our fair city was named kill you. If you’re not good with fire, Bubble). The best tradesmen in town work seven-day trip to the moon. So when people after. The two women stand frozen in stay away from the torch. here, but there aren’t any flashing signs first board, the passenger decks are at laughter, Chang’e’s hand on Artemis’s or advertisements. They don’t need to draw 1g, and by the time they reach the moon, forearm. They seem to be in the middle of in customers. They get their business they’re at 1/6th g. They do the reverse on some friendly girl talk. Locals know them through reputation. the way back to get folks accustomed to 1g as The Ladies. again. How cool is that? FIG.1 Earthers—How Artemisians refer to people Loonies—How some Earthers refer to who live on Earth; no offense. Sanchez Aluminum—Major aluminum-smelting Artemisians; we hate it when they calls us operation located one kilometer south of that. ESA—Short for European Space Agency. Artemis. Anorthite— Mineral essential for the Lunar Express, The—See Moonorail. production of aluminum; abundant in the EVA—Short for Extra Vehicular Activity. Moltke Foothills in the highlands south Scurry pack—A backpack life-support system Mare Tranquillitatis(The Sea of Tranquility)— of Artemis. See figure 1. FFC Cambridge Process—Sophisticated worn by lunar tourists during an EVA in a A large basaltic plain in the aluminum-smelting procedure employed by hamster ball. It adds oxygen and removes Tranquillitatis basin on the lunar surface. Arcade, The— New York has Fifth Avenue, Sanchez Aluminum in which anorthite is carbon dioxide as needed. It keeps the air The site of the Apollo 11 Lunar Landing London has Bond Street, and Artemis has the reduced to its base elements with at the correct pressure and temperature. and, therefore, the Apollo 11 Visitor Arcade. The stores don’t bother to list electricity. Center. Artemis is situated near the prices. If you have to ask, you can’t Shepard—See the map. southern edge of Mare Tranquillitatis. afford it. The Arcade District is located Gizmo—Multi-use device essential to Artemis in the center of the ground floor of Aldrin living; locks and unlocks doors, displays Slug—Short for soft-landed grams. S-L-G. Moltke Foothills— Highlands located three Bubble. schedules, makes monetary transactions, Slug. One slug gets one gram of cargo kilometers south of Artemis at the southern presents notifications: phone calls, delivered from Earth to Artemis, courtesy edge of Mare Tranquillitatis; primary site Armstrong Bubble—See the map. messages, alarms, and more. of KSC. It’s technically not a currency. of Sanchez Aluminum’s anorthite harvesting We’re not a country; we can’t have a activity Artemis—First and only colony on the moon Gunk—Dried algae and flavored extracts; currency. Slugs are pre-purchased service (so far). Located 40 kilometers south of generally tastes gross. credit from KSC. symbol: ğ the Apollo 11 landing site near the southern edge of Mare Tranquillitatis; Trigger—My electric cart I use to make Greek Goddess of the moon, daughter of Zeus deliveries for my job as a porter. It’s a FIG.2 and Leto — and twin sister of Apollo pain in the ass to control, but it’s good at carrying heavy things. So I decided it Artemis Longstep, The—Walking technique was male. I named him Trigger. employed by Artemisians that entails taking Moonorail—What many tourists call the long, quick strides to build momentum and Uphoff-Crouch Cycler Orbit—A special passenger train that operates between the get somewhere quickly. It’s a moon thing. ballistic orbit for spacecraft traveling Artemis Point of Entry and the Apollo 11 back and forth between the Earth and the Visitor Center; technically not a monorail; Artemisian—Permanent resident of Artemis; Hamster Ball—Sealed, clear inflatable ball moon; a transfer orbit conceived to sometimes referred to as the Lunar Express. as Artemis is not a country, technically used by tourists for extra vehicular leverage gravitational forces for efficient See figure 3. we can’t be called “citizens.” Lucky us. activities (EVAs); its flexible polymer shuttling of humans and equipment from Low skin is designed to block the majority of Earth Orbit (LEO) to Low Moon Orbit (LMO). OLTS—Short for Optical Loss Test Set; used Bean Bubble—See the map. incoming sunlight. See figure 2. to determine how much light is lost to heat ZAFO—Probably an acronym.