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Cold Open: The brothers (Bell-ski) led the largest Jewish led rescue operation of Jewish civilians in ALL of World War II. They saved over 1,200 men, women, and children - roughly 70% were women, children, and the elderly - by hiding them in the forests of Western Belo-russia, formerly Poland, currently , from 1942-1944 and through killing several hundred Nazi soldiers. Yeah buddy!

More than 20,000 descendants of the survivors the Bielski’s helped save are alive today because of the ingenuity, heart, and perseverance of these men and the bravery of those willing to join them. They led numerous attacks against the German forces, sabotaging their war and round up efforts, killing their soldiers, and earning a huge target on their heads. They dodged bullets and grenades, survived in the wild, and avoided capture over and over again while being hunted by thousands of armed soldiers.

You ready for a little inspiration today? You ready to get angry? A little choked up? Little less of a Triple M flavor to today’s Suck and more of a Rage Against the Machine vibe. Fuck you, I won’t do what ya tell me! Let’s get pumped, let’s get some revolutionary blood flowing through our veins, let’s feel thankful to just be alive today. LIFE is what the Bielski brothers fought for - and we deep dive them today, and go on a big emotional rollercoaster of a Suck, today, on Timesuck!

PAUSE TIMESUCK INTRO

I. Preroll Sponsor: MACK WELDON Hey Timesuckers. Hey Space Lizards. Hey Cult of the Curious. I’m Dan Cummins aka the Master Sucker and YOU are listening to Timesuck. And today’s Timesuck is brought to you by longtime

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II. Welcome!!: Alright Suckers. Recording from that same hotel room at the Bonus Crowley episode in Brea California again. Can’t wait to get back to the Suck Dungeon in Couer d’Alene next week. Thanks to all of you who came out to Brea over the weekend. So many new awesome gifts for the Suck Dungeon! I’ll get them all put up and get pics posted at @timesuckpodcast on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I can’t wait to see what Cleveland has in store next week. Hail Nimrod!

Thanks for all the recent iTunes reviews - just about to hit 3,000! May be 3,000 by the time you hear and that’s really good for a podcast. And it really helps Timesuck stay in the charts and reach new listeners. All reviews and ratings everywhere help so much - thanks for taking the time to do them. And thanks for so many five star ratings. They don’t make me feel like it’s time to rest easy by the way. Just make me

hungry to earn some more.

Tour dates. Where are they?

At Hilarities in Cleveland, Ohio next weekend, March 22-24th. Mr. Jon Huck kicking the show off - love working with him. So funny. Get there Cleveland. The Browns made some kick ass trades this past week - congrats on Landry and Tyrod Taylor. I sincerely hope you guys do some damage this coming season.

More fun shows coming up fast. Charlotte, North Carolina on April 8, Atlanta on the 9th, Birmingham on the 10th, Huntsville, Alabama - come on out NASA - let’s talk about the Flat Earth on the 11th, Nashville on the 12th, Houston the 13th, Dallas the 14th, San Antonio the 15th, and then Salt Lake City the 20th and 21st.

San Francisco, Sacramento, and Phoenix coming up right afterwards. And another live Timesuck podcast on Spokane on May 6th.

If you’re not familiar with my standup you can check out either my most recent special, Don’t Wake the Bear, available to watch on Amazon and elsewhere- it streams for free for Amazon Prime members.

Or, you can listen to my recent Pandora exclusive, Maybe I’m the Problem that Pandora Premium listeners can listen to as a proper album by clicking a link that will be in the episode description.

So much content - put it in your damn head already!

More tour dates at www.dancummins.tv Time for the Bielski brothers!

PAUSE INTERLUDE

III. Intro:

RESTARTED HERE

A. Who were the Bielski Brothers? Who were the Bielski brothers?

They were Skippy, Lance, Gary, and Leonard, and before the war they ran a barbers shop just outside of Warsaw where they made a decent living and also sang in a popular barbershop quartet. If not for the war, they could’ve been as big as the Friends of Yesterday. They were mostly known in the Jewish Club Scene for their rendition of that old standard Sweet Adeline. “ You're the flower of my heart, Sweet Adeline (Sweet Adeline) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvxMEzPBmY4 (for musical reference)

No - that is fucking ridiculous. They did sing in some cornball barbershop quartet.

No. The brothers were Tuvia (Two-vee-uh), Asael (Ah-soil), Zus, and Aron Bielski were four of 12 children born to a miller - a dude who works in a grain mill - and his wife in the rural, agricultural village of Stankevich (Stank ah vich), near the small city of (Nah Vah Grew Duck). They were the only Jewish family in this small Polish village that is now a part of Belarus. They rarely left their farm as children because they

were so scared of the very ugly, very monstrous-looking natives. Polish people living in the area. As many of you know, all Polish people are very, very, VERY ugly. And they’re as dumb as they are unattractive. And this village had the dumbest, ugliest Pollocks in all of Poland. Mirrors had been banned back in 1903. On Halloween, a local tradition started back in 1915, where local trick or treaters would dress up as non-Polish attractive people who could speak clearly and intelligently since the rest of the year they already looked like traditional Halloween monsters.

If you’re a first time listener - I hope you’re still listening and realize I’m joking. My wife Lyzne is half-Polish and it amuses me greatly to needlessly and undeservedly slander her heritage. Love you Polish bastards!

But seriously, the Bielski’s grew up in Stankevich which is tiny enough to not show up under various alternative spellings on Google Maps. Like, at all. It just doesn’t show up. It only shows up in searches related to the Bielski brothers, and then only shows as being referenced as the place of their birth. So, while they were the only Jewish family, I’m guessing there were also only like, four other families. It reminds me of places back in Idaho, like Pinehurst and Rapid River.

Pinehurst - not the town of Pinehurst in the Silver Valley near Kellogg and Wallace - the Pinehurst about 15 miles South of Riggins, is a place I lived for two years while going to school in Riggins. And, the little Pinehurst had a church and a little cafe slash gas station slash mini-store hybrid. And about 10-15 houses. No post office, bank, do dentist - not many people who

have ever been to a dentist - that kind of a place.

I had several friends that lived in Rapid River, a little neighborhood about 5 miles South of Riggins that’s had it’s own little store off and on as well. And again - doesn’t show up on a map or in a search. Just a little neighborhood only locals would know of by name.

Guessing Stankevich was or is similar. Very small. A few farms ass opposed to a proper town of any sort.

Nearby Novogrudok (Nah Vah Grew Duck)— or Navahrudak (Nah- vah-drew-dack), as it’s now known - is an old, very well- documented little European city. It goes back at least as far as the 11th century. It was once sacked by the Mongols in 1241.

The town had seen it’s fair share of occupiers over the years. The Swedes sacked the town in 1706 and destroyed Navahrudak (Nah- vah-drew-dack) Castle. Russians twice attacked and occupied the town during the Russo-Polish War that was fought from 1654-1667. The town has seen it’s fair share of empires and rulers - it was the first capital of the Grand Duchy of Lithuania in the mid-13th century. It’s changed named, changed rulers, changed kingdoms, been sacked, been rebuilt.

But not perhaps since the Mongols had it seen an occupier so ruthless as the Nazis.

It had a thriving, pre-WWII Jewish population - with roughly 5,000 Jews living there in 1900 and approximately 20,000 by 1940. The Nazis would kill around 10,000 Jews in the city in 1941 alone. It has

a total population of roughly 30,000 today. The Nazis would occupy it for three years during WWII, the second time the Germans had taken it over. They also occupied it for three years during WWI. So, it had to been doubly painful for some of the older residents when they came back. “God Damn it! These stupid German assholes again!”

Novogrudok (Nah Vah Grew Duck) is a town that’s come recently been mentioned in news stories in association with President Trump. When President Trump was criticized in 2017 for not reacting quickly enough to some incidents of anti-Semitism, his son-in-law Jared Kushner came to the president’s defense by telling the story of his own Jewish grandmother’s escape from Nazi occupation in the Soviet Union. Rae Kushner fled through a tunnel dug underneath the Jewish ghetto in this small town. And she would make it to the Bielski camp in the woods and survive the war. The President’s son-in-law would not be alive today if not for the heroism of the Bielskis. So interesting!

B. Jewish Ghettos: And what does the term “ghetto” mean in today’s episode’s context? The term "ghetto" originated from the name of the Jewish quarter in Venice, Italy. Venetian authorities compelled the city's Jews to live in the quarter, which was established in 1516. In the 16th and 17th centuries, officials ranging from local authorities to the Austrian emperor ordered the creation of ghettos for Jews in Frankfurt, Rome, Prague, and other cities.

Nazi occupation authorities established the first ghetto in Poland in October 1939. The largest ghetto in Poland was the Warsaw ghetto. In Warsaw, more than 400,000 Jews were crowded into an area of 1.3 square miles. The story of the Warsaw Ghetto -

deserves it’s own Suck someday. I’ve been fascinated with that story for years.

C. The Bielskis: So - the Bielskis - you got this family of Jewish farmers living outside this storied city at the outbreak of WWII. It’s an area of no particular note. You got farmers, a small city full of all the various shops a small city will have - grocers, cafes, banks, government buildings, tailors, carpenters, etc.

When it’s not being sacked or occupied, sounds like a quiet, rural place to live. Off the beaten path. And the main Bielski players in today’s story are Tuvia, Asael, Zus, and Aron.

1. Tuvia (Two-vee-uh) Bielski: The oldest of the brothers, he was “elected” as the leader of their group, by family members, in 1942; he’s tall, handsome, an avid reader, a natural leader and instills a sense of safety and confidence in others. He’s charismatic and highly intelligent. Neighbor’s referred to him as the “Clark Gable of the Bielskis”. Prior to WWII, Tuvia had been a corporal in the Polish army. And he’d continually take whoever needed refuge, despite the risks. He’s from Defiance.

2. Asael (Ah-soil) Bielski: Second in command to Tuvia, led many fighters into sabotage missions, was considered the “go to” guy when something was needed. He was played by British actor Jamie Bell in the movie. He was quieter and more reserved than his other brothers and had the war not been brought to this door he would’ve been happy to stay on the family farm.

3. Alexander “Zus” (Zeus) Bielski: Zus was the third oldest brother, born tour years after Asael and he was the brother in charge of gathering intelligence. He was a hot head - prior to the war his parents had to negotiate with local authorities on several occasions to keep them from arresting Zus for getting into fights. He was the more light hearted of the three, even seen as a bit of a “playboy” for the time. He’d apparently have his fair share of “forest wives” while hiding in the woods from Nazis. Handsome, confident, a bit of a pistol. He was played by Liev Schreiber in Defiance.

4. Aron Bielski : Aron (Air-ron) Bielski was the youngest of the brothers involved in the uprising. He was 14 when the war hit home. His main job was to survive but he would help gather intelligence. Played by the young British actor George MacKay in Defiance.

And all these brothers had a reputation, prior to the war, for being tough. Just like anti-semitism was rife in Germany well before the war, re-listen to last year’s Third Bonus Suck on the Rise of the Third Reich for more on that - it was rife in pre-war Poland as well. And the Bielskis weren’t known to put up with it. They frequently got in fights with other local farm kids. They were proud to be Jewish and didn’t put up with local, Aryan shit. They were able to hold their own against the locals and live their lives. But then the Nazi’s came and changed everything in 1941.

Before we dig into the Bielski’s direct encounters with the Nazis - the battles they fought against them, let’s talk about

the kind of people these dudes would be fighting.

IV. Some Nazis A. Couple tales from or about people, most of whom could be and may Timesucks’ themselves one day, to really establish how horrible the enemy the Bielskis fought truly was.

B. Gerda Weissmann Klein’s survival: Fellow Jewish Polish citizen Gerda Weissman did not fight back and was taken from another Polish city, Bielsko, in 1942 to the Gross-Rosen death camp. She’d bounce from one camp to another for the remainder of the war, working with textiles. And possessing a skill the Nazis valued was the only reason she survived.

By the end of the war, Gerda Weissmann was one of the “lucky ones” who survived and was liberated. She left the camp the day before her 21st birthday and weighed 68 pounds. Of the 2,000 other girls who had recently marched with her, only 120 survived. She saw girls, so frozen from the cold that their toes would literally break off, continue to march on command or be shot.

She’d recently been marched for six weeks by force on one of many Nazi “death marches” to a different camp as the Allies closed in on the Nazis. She hadn’t bathed in three years, and her hair had turned white. She was still wearing the ski boots her father had given her shortly before she was taken, insisting they would help her to survive. Her father was also taken and was killed in a concentration camp early in the war. Every family member she had would be killed by the Nazis.

The US soldier who held open a door to let her out of the last

camp she was held prisoner in was US Lieutenant Kurt Klein - a Jewish man who was born in Germany and immigrated to the United States to escape . Both of his parents had been killed by the Nazis at Auschwitz. And Gerda then fell in love with her liberator and the two became engaged in September 1945. They got married in 1946. And they’d stay married for 56 years until he died in 2002.

Gerda’s autobiographical account of , All but My Life (1957), was adapted for the 1995 short film, One Survivor Remembers, which received an Academy Award and an Emmy Award, and was selected for the National Film Registry. On February 15, 2011, Klein was presented with the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the highest civilian award in the United States.

And, as of this recording, she’s alive and well at 93 years old. And she was one of the many bright lights that the Nazi’s assigned zero worth to as a human being and were more than comfortable with snuffing out.

And that’s about a happy a tale as you’re gonna hear about survival Sespite all the death around her, Gerda at least lived. Former Nazi Oskar Groning knows of many, many others that didn’t.

C. Oskar Gröning aka “The Bookkeeper of Auschwitz” served in the SS at Auschwitz from 1942 until 1944, and then was brought to trial at 93 years of age in 2015. He was tried with 300,000 counts of accessory to murder in 2015 and sentenced to four years in prison - an incarceration length the court deemed

appropriate given his age. I don’t agree. He’s still alive and in prison today and set to get out next year. Once you’re an adult, age shouldn’t get you leniency. A crime’s a crime.

And Oskar is one of few Germans who has been willing to speak about his role in the Holocaust in effort to educate deniers - did you know deceased former chess wizard Bobby Fishcher, a man with a genius level IQ - was a holocaust denier, by the way?

Well, former Nazi Oskar wants to convince these deniers of the reality of this atrocity before he dies. His way of making some amends I guess. Here are some of his quotes:

1. "I want to tell those deniers that I have seen the crematoria, I have seen the burning pits, and I want to assure you that these atrocities happened," he said. "I was there."

2. "A child who was lying there was simply pulled by the legs and chucked into a truck to be driven away," he told the BBC in an interview 10 years ago. "And when it screamed like a sick chicken, they then bashed it against the edge of the truck so it would shut up."

Jesus. Interesting pronoun choice. All these years later, and he still refers to this child as an “it”. Probably a little easier to think about this having happened to an “it” rather than to a “he” or “she”.

So, a former piece of shit who at least feels enough remorse to confess. That, at least, makes him a much person than this

next example.

D. Ilse Koch aka “The Witch of Buchenwald”: Ilse (“Ill-sah”) Koch aka “The Witch of Buchenwald (Book-in-vald)” was also known as “The Bitch of Buchenwald (Book-in-vald)”, the “Butcher Widow”, and “The Beast of Buchenwald (Book-in-vald)”. And she was a serious piece of shit. She did stuff that might’ve made even Chikatilo cringe.

Her actions and reputation have created a terrifying legend that, had you not already heard about other monsters on Timesuck, might seem hard to believe.

1. Isle (“Ill-sah”) was a native German, born in Dresden, a bookkeeping clerk who went on to marry SS Col. Karl Koch in 1936, a man who would quickly build his own evil reputation. And her marriage to Koch would give her access to prisoners at the Sachsenhausen camp in Oranienburg (Oh-han-yun- burg) Germany near Berlin and then later the Buchenwald (Book-in-vald) camp near Weimar (Vy-mar), Germany, where she would become a sort of volunteer “commandant”. She was technically a guest but that wasn’t enough for her.

And this sadistic piece of shit was known to ride through camp on her horse arbitrarily whipping prisoners for sport. I imagine she had a big smile on her face while she did so. She was living in an evil Sadist’s paradise. And whipping was the the least of her crimes. Her greater crimes included creating a collection of lamp shades, gloves, and books made from the human skin of the forty prisoners she was rumored to have murdered for those particular uses. She was American skin

wearer Ed Gein’s dream girl! I imagine Ed was familiar with her work as he’d studied Nazi War Crimes extensively.

She was rumored to particularly enjoy tattooed skin. It was also rumored that she made, or at least used, soap made from the fat of prisoners. Shortly after the liberation of the Buchenwald Camp, war correspondent, Gene Currivan, observed that “parchment” was displayed inside the main gate that was, in actuality, the strips of tattooed flesh. A camp doctor and Koch had collected them as part of his “study” and her fixation.

She’d be one of the first prominent Nazis to be tried for War Crimes following the war, and a witness at her trial said the following:

“All prisoners with tattooing on them were to report to the dispensary… After the prisoners had been examined, the ones with the best and most artistic specimens were killed by injections. The corpses were then turned over to the pathological department, where the desired pieces of tattooed skin were detached from the bodies and treated further.”

2. Kark Koch: Her husband, Karl, was also, as you would imagine, a complete a total piece of shit. He was such a piece of shit he was actually killed before the war ended by fellow Nazis. That’s how you know someone’s a real scumbag, when they’re a Nazi who disgusts other Nazis with their behavior.

He was investigated for corruption, fraud, embezzlement,

drunkenness, sexual offenses and a murder and he was sentenced to death by firing squad for shaming the SS in April of 1945.

3. Isle’s Trial, Sentence, and Death: Isle (“Ill-sah”) was sentenced to life in prison for her war crimes, then had her sentence reduced to only four years when some became convinced she was innocent of some of her crimes, but then this sentence was overturned and she was re-sentenced to life in prison.

And then in 1967, she hanged herself while still incarcerated. She had been under the delusion that Jewish prisoners were attempting to harm her in the night.

How great is that? Little bit of karma came back to her in the end. I hope real shadow people were tormenting the fuck out of her in her final days. Why can’t this be the end story of every single Nazi? Tormented by their past crimes to the point they kill themselves once they can no longer handle the constant fear. Hard to imagine a more satisfying death. Tortured by the ghosts of those you yourself tortured. Maybe Shadow Bojangles showed up and chewed on her soul a bit before she ended it all. Maybe our fearless mascot snarled and snapped from the darkness of her mind until she couldn’t take it anymore.

Isle (“Ill-sah”) is an important name in the holocaust denier movement - the reason her first life sentence was reduced to four years was because no hard evidence was presented in court regarding items such as lampshades being made out of

human skin. In fact, some lampshades were presented that were made out of goat skin. And deniers point to this evidence as part of the proof that the holocaust is all made up. However, numerous witnessed testified at all the trials that they had witnessed her picking various prisoners based on their skin and that those prisoners were then never seen alive again.

I don’t think the exact type of skin found on one lamp potentially discredits the totality of all her crimes. Plenty of witnesses reported her being the personification of evil.

Speaking of evil personified, let’s talk about the Angel of Death.

One of the most infamous examples of a complete Nazi piece of shit is Josef Mengele (Meng-ah-ley).

E. Josef Mengele aka “Angel of Death”: Josef Mengele (Meng- ah-ley) aka the Angel of Death, was one of approximately thirty doctors at Auschwitz camp during World War II. And by the end of the war he worked his way into the top position of Chief Camp Physician of Auschwitz II through outrageous acts of cruelty. There wasn’t anything he wasn’t willing to do to a Jewish person to help the Nazi war effort and satisfy his own sadistic curiosity. And he’ll get a full Suck someday for sure.

As a physician, one of Mengle’s (Meng-ah-ley) required tasks was to sort incoming prisoners who arrived. This was called the “selection”. Prisoners were sorted into two categories for the most part: those to be killed immediately and those to be used

for slave labor. He was a face of terror to thousands - cold, calculated and cruel. He would often attend “selection” proceedings when off duty as well. You never take time off when you’re doing what you love! How fucked up is that? He clearly enjoyed the face to face process of deciding who lived and who died. Clearly loved playing God. For a time, he was also in charge of overseeing the use of Zyklon B gas in the gas chambers used for mass execution.

Mengele (Meng-ah-ley) was particularly focused on the use of twins in medical experimentation. Prior to the war, he had worked under another physician and used twins to study a variety of things. It was ideal to have two people with identical genetic makeup to study the effects of a variety of things in relation to environment and heredity. These studies were performed under strict protocol and with approved means. He was also intrigued by heterochromia - when people are born with two differently colored eyes, dwarves and people with physical deformities.

1. And much of his “research” centered around eugenics and the goal of proving the superiority of an Aryan Race which is nonsense as we’ve learned here on the Suck. “Race” is a social construct. Trace the shit back far enough and we’re all African. Germans weren’t always in Germany. And all of the various tribes of the world have been mingled to some degree if you go back far enough with other tribes. We’re all just meat sacks! Different shades of the same sack. Anyway, doctor fuckhead was attempting to learn how to enhance the number of “racially desirable” twin pregnancies. And his experiments included: purposely infecting one twin with a

disease to watch comparative health, forced blood transfusions from one twin to another, extracting health teeth to study, sewing twins together in an attempt to create conjoined twins and then separating them, drug experimentation, chloroform injections to the heart, injecting pigmentation into eyes in attempt to alter color, unnecessary limb amputation, and much more. He and Imperial Japan’s Doctor Shirō Ishii would’ve been besties. I’m surprised they weren’t pen pals.

2. Mengele Escapes: At the end of the war, Mengele (Meng-ah- ley) was in US custody but was quickly released because he wasn’t recognized but the soldiers who held him despite his well documented crimes, despite his name being on a list of wanted war criminals. Sounds sloppy, but, to be fair, the Allies were grabbing a shit load of war criminals and thousands upon thousands of Nazi at the end of the war and I’m guessing he was quite the smooth talking, sociopathic weasal. And it’s not like that hi-res, color photos of everyone back then.

He escaped and hid out for four years in Bavaria, working as a farmhand, before immigrating to Argentina. At first he lived there under an alias, but as time went one he eventually returned to Europe under his own name and even traveled back to Europe on vacation, securing an authentic German passport. Once Nazi hunters found him, Argentina was put under pressure for extradition. When they finally granted it he’d slipped away again, this time to the German enclave of Colonias Unidas, in Paraguay where he lived to the ripe old age of 67 and died from a stroke while swimming in the

coastal resort of Bertioga in 1979. Maybe. There are rumors that death was faked and that he lived even longer. Fuuuuuuuck. There will be a full suck for sure someday on that creep.

Why couldn’t that bastard die like Ilse Koch??

F. Overall holocaust stats: So - just wanted to give you a little sampling, a little taste of the types of people the the Bielski brothers were fighting. All manner of terrible things have been done in the name of winning a war by soldiers from all kinds of countries. War is inherently nasty and brutal, but the Nazis were exceptionally fucked up. And especially good at what they did, which was killing a preposterous amount of people. Which included an insane amount of non-combatants.

1. Overall Polish deaths: In WWII, the Nazi’s would kill at least 1.9 million non-Jewish Polish civilians during World War II. In addition, the Germans murdered at least 3 million Jewish Polish citizens.

2. Overall Nazi Victims: Overall, how many civilians and Jews did the Nazis kill in WWII? Historians agree it was right around 6 million. Additionally, they’d kill around 7 million Soviet civilians, ncluding 1.3 Soviet Jewish civilians, who are included in the 6 million figure for Jews.

They’d also take around 3 million Soviet prisoners of war - including Ukrainian nightmare and the Butcher of Rostov - Andrei Chikatilo’s father, if you recall that piece of shit, which I’m guessing most of you do, from Timesuck episode 57.

They’d kill 312,000 Serb civilians from Croatia, Bosnia and Herzegovina.

They’d murder up to 250,000 people with disabilities living in various European institutions. The’d butcher 196,000–220,000 of the Roma people - Gypsies, and just under 2,000 Jehovah's Witnesses. They’d execute at least 70,000 repeat criminal offenders and so-called asocials, an undetermined amount of political opponents and resistance activists, and hundreds if not thousands on the grounds of being homosexual.

They wreaked fucking havoc on mid-20the century Europe. And perhaps no civilians fought back more effectively than the Bielski brothers. And before we get into their incredible fight, we must check in with a quick word from today’s sponsor.

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Of course Timesuck is not brought to you by that. Sorry. Shit is so heavy I needed to lighten it up a bit for you Serious Suckers. If you’re a confused new listener wondering how that commercial could possibly be funny, maybe check out the back catalog.

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Alright Suckers. Sponsors and background out of the way, let’s jump into the Bielski’s incredible tale and epic fight for life in a Timesuck Timeline.

PAUSE TIMESUCK TIMELINE

V. Timesuck Timeline

A. 1902: In 1902, the first Bielski, son Chaim (Kaim), is born. And then between 1906 and 1927, the four brothers cental to today’s tale were born, all to David and Beila Bielski, who had twelve children in total, 10 sons and 2 daughters. They were a family of millers and grocers, living in Stankevich (Stank ah vich), near the small city of Novogrudok (Nah Vah Grew Duck).

The Bielskis owned a mill and farmed the land. Horses, cows, chickens, and geese also helped support the family. The Bielski mill stood at the river’s edge. The barn and several sheds were close to the mill, while the living quarters were further away and partly to the side of the rest of the dwellings. The Bielski home consisted of a wooden two-room hut. One room was only big enough to hold a medium-sized bed. Here slept the parents, Beila and David.

Each room had a small window and an unfinished clay floor. From the outside a door led into the main room that functioned as a kitchen, dining room, living room, and bedroom. To the right of this big room was a large built-in stove that served as a cooking stove, an oven, a heater, and a place to rest. During the winter months the warmth emanating from its stone surface made it a cozy sleeping place. Next to the stove a door led to the smaller room and a few wooden beds hugged the remaining walls. The center of this room was dominated by a rectangular table with two wooden benches at opposite sides. At the ends of the table stood armchairs reserved for each parent. Although the furnishings were sparse, the room was crowded, without a free wall, devoid of a single luxury item.

Because of limited space and the number of children, each bed

had to accommodate more than one occupant. In warm weather the barn offered additional sleeping space, easing the overcrowding. Though casual visitors wonder how such a large family could fit into this limited space, the Bielskis gave no thought to this matter.6 Born over a twenty-five-year span, some of the children would leave home before the birth of others. At no point did their hut accommodate the full family of fourteen.

And Tuvia (Two-vee-uh) had two older brothers, the first being born in 1902, Aron the youngest slipping on out in 1927. Holy shit. That poor woman was popping out babies for a quarter of a century. I feel truly terrible for her vagina. I feel like it probably could’ve qaulified for disability on its own by 1927.

12 kids. In a two-room hut! No thank you! How did they ever find time to make more after the first few were born? You’d have to be quick or real quiet or both. My grandpa Ward came from a family like that. I can’t imagine, as a parent trying to raise that many kids and provide from them. Just reading that makes me so glad that my old sperm tubes are tied off. I feel like I don’t spend nearly enough time with the two I have - can’t imagine how spread thin you’d feel with 12. And, as forgetful as I am, I can’t imagine keeping them all straight. I feel like there’d be at least one kid I’d keep forgetting.

“Alright, looks like everyone’s here, let’s head into town gang.”

“But Poppa! What about Alexander!?!”

“Alexander? Name sounds very familiar but i can’t quite

place it.”

“He’s your son, Poppa!”

“Really? I have a son named Alexander? That’s wonderful! Wait - is he the little one with rat tail and kind of pointy ears? Yes - that is Alexander. He kind of weirds me out, that one. Let’s leave him. 11 kids is already too many. No one will miss him!”

So. Big Jewish family, early 20th century Poland, living on a crowded farm with nothing but non-Jewish neighbors, many of whom were strongly anti-semitic. But, before the Nazi occupation, they hold their own and get along with the community. And the people that do give them shit, they handle. Long before the war, the Bielskis were known to be a tough, take no shit, bunch. The more I read about them, the more I love and admire them.

Check out this childhood tale:

1. Zus recalls defending the family farm: Zus would later recall defending the family farm as a teen. Some asshole, some “Chuck” for those of you who’ve already listened to the secret standup album - was a huge asshole whose land bordered the Bielski property.

He had a reputation of being nasty and greedy, someone to be avoided at any cost. And each year this neighbor would mow a few more inches of the Bielskis’ meadow and then claim it as his. Stealing a little bit of land each summer.

Zus Bielski said, “We grew up among the peasants, we knew them. We knew how to fight. My father was quiet, gentle. Mother was also a friendly person. . . . Father used to say that with fine people we have to be good and proper, but with bad people we have to be bad. . . . We would not let others push us around. We were never afraid, that was the kind of family we were.”

But in this case, David Bielski, didn’t feel like a fight was in order.He felt that the amount of land lost was so small it wasn’t worth bothering about and he advised his sons to ignore the matter.

Tuvia, Zus and some other brothers disagreed—to them it was a question of principle. So then one summer day when he was about fifteen, Tuvia, followed by his younger brothers, came to cut the grass. They were to start working at the edge of their property, near the neighbor’s meadow.

And when they went to work, Captain Dickhead burst out of his hut, screaming at the top of his lungs that they were now on his land and that they were trespassing. With a chuckle, Tuvia remembered: “He thought that if he screamed I would get scared. In his hand he held a scythe. He shouted, ‘I will kill you!!’ But I stood there laughing, which made him more furious. When he came closer, I reached for my scythe and with it hit his. He lost his balance and landed on his back.

When he was on the ground, I began to hit him with my hands. Four local farmhands came to look. They stood there

amused, laughing loudly at the man’s misfortune. “That day I gave him such a beating that we did not see him for two weeks. I was young then, a teenager, but I was big and strong. I was not afraid of the non-Jews and fought hard whenever one of them tried to wrong me.”

Like I said. Love this family! They didn’t take shit from anyone. And they wouldn’t take shit from the Nazis.

And, as I said early in the episode, they’re living outside Novogrudok (Nah Vah Grew Duck), the old town that had been ruled by a variety of rulers throughout its long history. A town that recently had been under siege or occupied numerous times. From 1915-1918 (WWI) it was under German control, for a bit in 1919 it was under Polish control (Polish-Bolshevik war), then it fell under the Soviet Red Army in 1920. In 1921, it was ceded to Poland. By the time WWII is in swing, in 1939, this area that had already been embattled for years and was anywhere but where you wanted to be. And it had a well established Jewish quarter, with just over 5,000 Jewish community members in the early 1900’s.

B. Fall 1939: For a brief period before the Nazi’s arrived, the Red Army of Russia took over their homeland. It was known as Western Belorussia. And again, today, their land is known as Belarus. And while the Russians weren’t as bad as the Nazi’s, they also weren’t pro-jew. They quickly abolished Jewish political parties, outlawed Jewish participation in various jobs and academic roles by labeling Jews as “politically undesirable”, and confiscated Jewish property. They deported some Jews and other Poles who didn’t adhere to the new regime to their

satisfaction to Siberian gulags.

In 1939, Tuvia and his wife lived in nearby Sybotniki and owned a small shop that collected and transported scrap metal to foundries. And then the Russians came and confiscated their business and added them to the politically undesirable list. Tuvia went into hiding from Russian authorities and his wife, who he’d soon divorce, stayed in Sybotniki to try and wait things out.

And then the Germans came in 1941 and shit went from bad to worse

C. June 22, 1941: On June 22nd, 1941, the Germans begin their march to the Bielskis. With begins with Germans invading Western Belorussia in the Soviet Union - Adolf Hitler launched his armies eastward in a massive invasion of the Soviet Union: three great army groups with over three million German soldiers, 150 divisions, and three thousand tanks smashed across the frontier into Soviet territory. The invasion covered a front from the North Cape to the Black Sea, a distance of two thousand miles.

We touched on this in Timesuck 71, the Joseph Stalin suck - Hitler breaking the non-aggression pact he’d had with Stalin. This would end as a military disaster for Hitler, to the relief of the world, but not before costing millions of innocent lives and sending the Bielski brothers into the role of heros.

D. Late June 1941: In late June of 1941, Zus, Tuvia and Asael were called upon by the local Polish military to resist the Germans but the military quickly disbanded and they were on their own. The

Russians began their retreat Eastward within days of the initial German attack and many Jews went with them feeling that life under the Russians, bad as it was, would at least be better than life under the Germans. Two of the Bielski children, Estelle and Joshua, would follow them and survive. The rest remained and David claimed that the war would not last forever and that Germany would lose. And he was right. Unfortunately, the war would last long enough to destroy almost his entire family.

E. July 1941: In July of 1941, laws are passed that require Jews to wear stars on the front and back of their clothes, prohibit them from walking on the sidewalks, along with various other ridiculous rules.

In August, pro-Nazi police come to the Bielski family home seeking information on the brothers - Tuvia, Zus, and Asael who didn’t share their father’s trust that everything would get better soon and were actively hiding from the Nazis - secret staying at the homes of non-Jews, obtaining false IDs, that sort of thing. It easy at this time for officials to know which Jews were missing because Jews had been held under close watch even more the Nazi’s got there thanks to the Russians and due to a variety of sources: census records, synagogue records, neighbors, school records etc. And the Nazis wanted all local Jews to be identified and accounted for. When the Bielski father, David, doesn’t give them the information the way they want it, he’s beaten and his ribs are broken with a rifle.

F. Fall 1941: Life begins to worsen rapidly in the area throughout Fall of 1941. The younger brothers of Tuvia, Zus, and Asael, named Yakov and Abraham - are arrested and killed in October

because they wouldn't give any information of their older brothers' whereabouts. Jews are now going missing and being visibly killed daily. The sound of gunfire is constant. Yellow stars now have to be worn by all Jewish citizens at all times. Their valuables are being forcibly taken and handed over to Nazi soldiers at all times. Still, the Bielski parents refuse to leave their home.

G. December 8, 1941: Then, on December 8th, 1941, Nazi officials gather over 6,000 Jews in the Nowogrodek (Nah Vah Grew Duck) District and began the “selection” process. Jews sent to the left have been chosen to be executed. Those sent to the right were to be deported to the ghettos. Of course no one knew this at first.

Local Jewish families not present for the selection are rounded up. When the Bielskis don’t show, Nazi officers head to their home and young Aron was at home when the officers came. He hid behind a tree and watched in fear as his parents and two of his brothers were drug from the home and forced into wagons. And he’d never see them again.

A massive grave had been dug prior to the selection, and the those deemed unfit for the ghettos - roughly 5,000 of the 6,000 were forced into it before soldiers opened fire.

Witness Sonya Oshman described the mass execution years later in a Bielski brothers documentary, saying, “It was a big grave. Very long one. They told the people to get in and they were shooting. The people who got the bullet, they were lucky. The ones who didn’t, had to die, to suffocate, buried alive. The

gentile people that they lived around saw that the ground was moving. It was constantly moving. It took more then a week for all of them to die.”

Holy fuck. Hell on Earth. And the Bielski parents die in this pit of despair. So did Zus’s wife and infant daughter.

And if you’re wondering, why didn’t the Nazis put all of the local Jews into that pit? Why kill 5,000 of 6,000? Why set up a ghetto at all?

1. Reason for Ghettos: Well, because the ghettos were assets in the German war effort. They didn’t just put them in these sealed off neighborhoods and then leave them alone. They ghettos supplied free labor and the production of various goods for the Nazis. This policy was called ‘rescue by labour’. For a time, before the late stages of the war when a higher and higher percentage of Jews were just killed for being Jewish regardless of ability, certain Jewish community leaders were able to convince Nazi leaders to allow them to live so they could help. What a fucked up position to be put in.

2. Life in the Ghettos a) Life in the ghettos wasn’t much better than death. Once families entered the through the gates, there was no plan or organization for living. Five or six families would share a small living space, some families would be split up, and comfort was nowhere.

b) If someone attempted to talk to someone outside the ghetto or tried to get food from the other side, they were

shot. Despite this, peasants often came to the border to trade food for gold and valuables that had been smuggled into the ghetto by Jewish prisoners. It was a small risk for them, large for the Jew, and could earn them a hefty earning - Bread for gold.

H. The Bielski’s Reach the Forest: After avoiding the ghetto roundup, Zus and Asael rescue Aron hide in the surrounding forest. They learn how to survive in the Naliboki (Naa-lah-bok-ee) forest, which is about 3,000 square kilometers of wild woods, full of swamps, deer, wild birds, bear, other wildlife. Tuvia is living in nearby at the time. He’d obtained false papers and could pass a gentile. But, hearing about the mass execution, he returns to Stank-o-vich to search for his brothers and searches the forest near his family’s farm for his brothers. Zue and Aasel have set up a small camp to base to live in and learn early on that if they don’t want to have to move all of the time they have to be extremely careful as to their location.

1942: In mid-February of 1942, a massive mistake was made. A group of men, out for supplies, found a cow and killed it. As they carried it back to camp, a trail of blood was left and German soldiers happen upon it. On arrival, the Germans opened fire. Partisans ran in all directions. Some ended up in a clearing where machine gun fire cut them down. The camp was destroyed and the survivors relocated seven miles west of Nowogrodek (Nah Vah Grew Duck), farther into the forest.

I. March 1942: By March 1942, nine people had joined Asael, Zus, and Aron in the forest. By April the group was up to 14 members. Asael and Zus taught some members how to shoot.

This was done without ammunition since it was too precious to be wasted on training. Besides, one had to be careful about noises that would attract attention. This enlarged group followed the established pattern. Under the cover of darkness a few men would venture into the village for food. Intimidated by the guns, the peasants would hand over whatever provisions they had.

The Germans avoided the forest, particularly when dark. The group took advantage of this and did most of their household chores in the evening, including cooking. Their meals were made in a large pot that hung from a branch. A fire was built underneath. They slept in tents under a tree. These tents served only as temporary shelters and were built out of branches, which were covered with all kinds of material. Although the tents offered protection from the cold and wind, they were less reliable when it came to rain or snow. No one undressed for the night—it was warmer and safer to sleep with clothes on, a habit followed by most partisans. The group’s survival depended in part on its ability to move. The peasants, their food suppliers, were poor and therefore unable to feed a large group for an extended time. Not to overburden them, the group would collect food from different farms. Besides, if these natives thought that a group of Jews had settled close to their village, they might be tempted to report them to the authorities. The Germans demanded from the local population the delivery of Jewish fugitives. To assure compliance, in addition to punishments they offered special rewards. The group’s movement was also dictated by chance meetings with civilians. One could never be sure whether these occasional encounters would lead to denouncement, and a change of location decreased the chance of discovery.

J. May, 8 1942: On May 8, 1942, another huge mass execution in the Nowogrodek (Nah Vah Grew Duck) ghetto takes place. The population of the ghetto had built back up to roughly 6,000 since the murder of roughly 5,000 Jews six months earlier. They’d be brought in from other nearby cities and rural areas. All the ghetto inmates were ordered to assemble in the central section. And once again the Germans and their collaborators split the Jewish population into two groups. 5,670 ghetto inmates are murdered that day. Only roughly 250 were left.

This time, the prisoners decided that they had no option left and began the dangerous task of digging a tunnel out, using spoons, forks, and their hands to dig. They’d dig a tunnel 600 feet they’d later be able to exit from in a single file fashion.

K. Mid-May 1942: In mid-May Tuvia Bielski, his new wife Sonia, and four members of Sonia’s family catch up with Asael, Zus, and Aron in the forrest. And the group, slowly increasing in size, continues to wander from place to place in the forest.

They were a group of more than 20 by now and Tuvia was chosen to be their leader. Their primary objective was clear: To rescue and save as many Jews as possible. Around this time, prisoners of the Nowogrodek (Nah Vah Grew Duck) ghetto have heard of the Bielskis and attempt to make contact.

L. August, 1942: By August of 1942, the Bielski group is now known as the Bielski Otriad - Russian for brigade or military detachment. Tuvia became the commander, responsible for running the otriad, formulating its policies, and maintaining its security. Asael, as the second in command, was in charge of the

day-to-day activities of the unit and the armed men. Zus was appointed head of reconnaissance. He would collect information affecting the group’s existence and safety. His job required familiarity with the area and the local population.

As commander, Tuvia made it clear that his brothers would respect him. Twice he had Zus whipped and tied to a tree in the center of camp. He had Asael whipped as well. Once, to establish how much control he had, he had Zus whip Asael. Another time he had Zus whip Asael who then whipped Aron who then whipped an elderly woman, Ruth, who then whipped five year old Rachel who then whipped a baby. He had to maintain order and I totally get it. Not everyone is gonna understand the need to whip that baby. But I do. In context, it makes sense.

And Tuvia made it clear that they would deny another Jews inclusion into their group. He would repeat over and over that it was better to save one Jew than to kill twenty Germans. This was a position he never budged from, no matter what the circumstances or the danger. And if a baby had to get whipped, so be it.

And the whipping stuff is total nonsense by the way. The only real whipping that was done was some emotional whipping done by me to you the listener.

Anywho - the Bielski Otriad began sneaking notes and letters into the ghettos of Nowogrodek (Nah Vah Grew Duck) and Lida. They urged others to risk death and escape, to join them in the forest. A Gentile peasant farmer, a rare ally named Konstantine

Kozlovsky, aided with this. The penalty for this help, or an attempted escape, was death by hanging. And Konstantine had three of his grown sons living with him. And he put all of their lives at risk when he helped.

What a cool dude Konstantine was! Holy shit. That’s a brave son of a bitch. In a way, arguably even braver than the Bielskis. The Bielskis were insanely brave, but they were hunted. They were gonna be hunted whether they helped others or not. Whether they fought back or not, the Nazis were gonna try to find them and kill them. Konstantine could’ve just kept out of the whole mess and just lived his life. He wasn’t inherently in harms way. He choose to be in harm’s way to do the right thing. And that, is an incredibly rare thing to do.

It’s so easy to read about this stuff and think - “I’d never help the Nazis! I’d rather die.” Would you? And what if you knew that not only you’d die, but, your kids would be killed if you didn’t play ball. What if you’d be raped or wife would be raped if you didn’t follow orders. Would you risk the lives of all of your family to help some strangers because it’s the right thing to do? History has shown us time and time again that most people will NOT take that risk which is why it’s always so damn impressive. So noble. Most people go along with it so no harm comes to them. Ironically, harm does tend to come to the people don’t resist - it just takes a little longer. Usually, when you’re turning a blind eye to some ruthless motherfucker ravaging your neighbors, it’s only a matter of time before they come for you too.

But in this case, if you’re Aryan and gentile, you really could just do nothing and be fine. You could, pretty much, for sure keep on living. Your family could living. Or, you could help people you don’t even know, and put the lives of everyone you love in grave danger.

I get irritated when people get incredulous about the German people, or the Polish gentiles, turning a blind eye to the Nazis. “How could they do that!?! ” Because they didn’t want to fucking die, that’s how. Same reason a lot of soldiers became Nazis. I’m sure a fair amount of them thought, privately, that Hitler was pretty fucked up and so was his agenda, but, when they’re called into service, it’s either join or die.

All of this is such a good reminder not to cave into social pressure to stay quiet about what you think is fucked up in society. Let your voice be heard.

Alright - back to today’s tale.

M. September of 1942: Shortly after making contact with the ghetto, in September, the escape tunnel is finished, and prisoners begin trickling out from Nowogrodek (Nah Vah Grew Duck) and they find the Bielski Otriad.

On one rainy night that September, hundreds of ghetto prisoners crawled through their tunnel to either freedom or death. Many were shot or captured once they reached the other side of the wall, but 170 escaped and found their way to the Bielski

Brothers Partisan Group. The group was now over 300 strong.

N. Early 1943: The winter of 1943 was hard and ten members of the group were killed while on a mission to gather food and supplies. The farmer, who led to those deaths, and his family were later murdered by the partisan group. Tuvia prepared his men for retribution, they surrounded the farm, killed them all, and burnt the structures to the ground. There would be a penalty for the killing of Jews. I like it! Don’t let those fuckers get away with murder when you can help it. Vengeance!

Also, the Bielski’s formed an alliance with some Russian soldiers around this time who were also hiding out in the forest at this time and who are also fighting the Nazis. Stalin, after retreating in 1939, was beginning to send small brigades back into this area of Belorussia slash Poland in the Winter of 1942/1943. Small otriads of soldiers parachuted into the area and were to protect local civilians loyal to Russia. And the Bielskis began fighting alongside and in collaboration with these Russians against the Nazis.

Zus would lead fighters in collaboration with Russian partisans to sabotage German trains. The “War on the Rails” began. In total, the traveled over forty miles, destroying train tracks and effectively cutting off German supply to the front for 51 hours of war time. This infuriated the Germans and a they put a reward of 100,000 marks on Tuvia’s capture - dead or alive. In total, the Otriad would “derail six echelons of the enemy, bombed 19 bridges, burned down a lumber factory and eight national German estates, blew up 800 meters of railroad tracks, and killed 261 police officers and Nazis.

They also prevented deportation of more than one thousand residents to the forced labor camps in Germany. How incredible. All from their little base in the woods!

O. July, 1943: In July of 1943, The Nazi Germans began “Operation Hermann” in an attempt to liquidate partisan groups in the forests. 20,000 (some reports say 52,000) German troops were sent to find and destroy Jewish hideouts.

The Bielski Otriad has to abandon a newly constructed camp where they had some roughly constructed bunkers and the beginnings of a little town in the woods. They’re forced to head deeper into the woods and have to cross a large swamp in effort to stay safe. During the crossing, children were carried on shoulders, water was often waist or shoulder deep, and bullets are heard. People, in need of rest, were tied to trees to keep from drowning and mud swallowed their tired legs, but somehow no one dies and they ALL make it across.

Eventually, the Germans tracking them give up. The Bielski Partisan group was now 75 miles west of Minsk, deep into the Naliboki forest, and begin to build their first permanent base for the now over 800 members of their crew. After years of constant moving, they begin to construct what they call their “Jerusalem in the Woods”.

P. Fall of 1943: By the Fall of 1943, with their numbers reaching over 800, they began construction on a more permanent home.

Their camp becomes pretty damn impressive. They had carved

out underground dugouts bunkers. They cut down timber to reinforce the tops of these bunkers. In addition, several utility structures were built: a kitchen, a mill, a bakery, a bathhouse, a medical clinic for the sick and wounded and a quarantine hut for those who suffered from infectious diseases such as typhus.

Herds of cows supplied milk. Artisans made goods and carried out repairs, providing the combatants with logistical support that later served the Soviet partisan units in the vicinity as well. More than 125 workers toiled in the workshops, which became famous among partisans far beyond the Bielski base. Tailors patched up old clothing and stitched together new garments; shoemakers fixed old and made new footwear; leather-workers labored on belts, bridles and saddles. A metalworking shop established by Shmuel Oppenheim repaired damaged weapons and constructed new ones from spare parts. A tannery, constructed to produce the hide for cobblers and leather workers, became a de facto synagogue because several tanners were devout Hasidic Jews. Carpenters, hat-makers, barbers and watchmakers served their own community and guests. The camp's many children attended class in the dugout set up as a school. The camp even had its own jail and court of law.

They had plays in the evenings for entertainment and it began to feel a little like more of a life, more than just survival. They built a whole secret town in the middle of Nazi territory. A town with over a thousand people. Holy shit is that impressive!

And most impressive is that someone was somehow able to sneak in a few wartime issues of the popular American comic book Pootie and Juju to help boost morale. The most

popular issues was issue 36, Rabbi Pootie and Doctor Juju where they two go undercover, Pootie dressed as a Hasidic rabbi and Juju as a Jewish doctor and they make their way to and are taken to a concentration camp, where, once inside, the shed their costumes and the Nazis soon realize that these are not two Jewish men but are actually two non-gender specific not-human cartoon characters who cannot be killed. The Nazis shoot them and the bullets turn their little bodies into swiss cheese but then the just rebuild themselves in the next frame and yell, “Too Little, Too Diddle Nazis!” and “Put it in your lunchbox, Hitler!” The Nazis throw grenades on them and the just shrug, look at the reader through the 4th wall, are gone the next frame, and then back and unharmed the frame after that. And then free all the Jewish captives, put all of the Nazis in the gas chamber, and high five as they kill them all, screaming “Park it in the Shed!” And then they lead their freed Jewish prisoners to camp after camp, kicking Nazi ass all across Europe! Gotta love some Pootie and Juju!!!!

Confused new listner? Don’t be - it’s just Pootie and Juju. The silly little cartoon that exists only within the Timesuck universe.

In all seriousness though, they built themselves an entire functioning village in the forest.

Q. February of 1944: In February of 1944, The Russians sought help again and asked for a clearing to be made as a landing strip for Russian supply planes. With this advancement made, news began to reach the group. They learned that the Germans had

surrendered to the Red Army in Stalingrad and that the Russians were pushing the Nazis out of their territory. Hope spread - any day could now be their liberation!

R. July 9th, 1944: A group of Nazi soldiers, retreating from the frontline, accidentally stumbles into their town. The Nazis opened fire, threw grenades, and nine of the partisans died in the battle. And then the Bielski Otriad mowed those fuckers down.

Four retreating Nazis were captured and literally beaten to death by various men and women in the group. They screamed, hit, spat on, and cried as the German soldiers begged for mercy. And they gave them none. They yelled that this was for their mothers, sisters, brothers, and fathers.

Holy shit. I can’t imagine how cathartic that must of been. Those Nazis really, really wandered into the wrong part of the woods.And then the next day, the war was over. They awoke to a Russian caravan announcing that they were free, and they could go home.

S. July 10, 1944: And then, on July 10th, 1944, The Bielski brothers led their unit of 1,236 Jewish survivors out of the forest and back into the world.

And that miraculous accomplishment takes us out of this Timesuck timeline.

PAUSE TIMESUCK TIMELINE OUTRO

VI. Segue into Idiots of the Internet. A. Wow. How intense is this tale? Hiding in the woods, literally surrounded by Nazis for years. Building your own ragtag army to join the Russians and fight the Nazis. Going from stealing here and there from local farmers and villagers to survive. Building your own self-sustaining and hidden community.

And this is just a brief overview of many incredible and/or terrible stories involving the Holocaust and the Nazi’s attempted total destruction of the Jewish people. And yet, many don’t believe the holocaust ever happened. People who, I’m guessing, are likely to also believe the Earth is flat. Dumbshits. Idiots of the internet.

PAUSE IDIOTS OF THE INTERNET

VII. Idiots of the Internet

A. CNN Holocaust denier video: https://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=nkm6bLE0Bmk

A video about holocaust deniers felt appropriate for today’s Suck. And I found a recent one.

This is from a CNN interview, posted by CNN on Feb. 8th, 2018, where Arthur Jones, is interviewed, a man/vile, ignorant piece of shit is running for a US Republican congressional seat in Illinois even though the Republican Party, to their credit, are urging their members NOT to vote him. That’s when you might want to

rethink your policies, when you’re own party is telling voters not to vote for you.

He’s running unopposed for the party’s 3rd Congressional District nomination on March 20. He’s also a former leader of the American Nazi Party. And, he was convicted of both beastiality and pedophilia in 2006. No he wasn’t. I just hate this guy so much I wanted to say that. He was a former Nazi party leader though.

Ugh.

Back on February 29, 2012, he was quoted as saying "the Holocaust is nothing more than an international extortion racket by the Jews. It's the blackest lie in history.” And to make this idiotic statement even more idiotic, this guy isn’t 30 years old. He’s 70. He was born in 1948. He grew up in the years directly following the Holocaust when hundreds of thousands of survivors were still alive, telling their stories, revealing their concentration camp tattoos. Nazi war crime trials were being broadcast on the news when he was a young man. He, especially, should know better.

He’s a gigantic piece of shit whackadoodle.

He has a website, artjonesforcongressman.com, where talks about his policies. The first four listed are:

1. Bring our troops home NOW to defend our borders! 2. No more “Sanctuary Cities”! 3. No amnesty for illegal aliens!

4. Make English the official language!

Altogether, they really paint a picture don’t they?? “I don’t want Americans living in non-white countries or fighting non-white wars. I don’t want non-whites coming into our countries and I want as many non-whites as possible thrown the fuck out of this country. And I don’t want to hear any more non-white mumbo jumbo when I’m in an uber, or buying a taco, or getting my lawn mowed. So make the right vote - make the white vote - on March 20th…”

And on Feb. 8th, he spoke with CNN's Alysin Camerota about his holocaust stance. They feature a recent speech, where you can watch him speak, and, if I was recording in the dungeon, I’d play you his audio. Instead, I’ll quote it. He says, or more accurately screams, “The white majority are fed up! With all of these lying, cheating, thieving, war-mongering, child molesting, political pimps and whores, of this corrupt and decadent two party, Jew Party, queer party system!!”

I would’ve screamed that as well for emphasis, but again, I am recording in a hotel room, I’m white, I have a tattoo of Idaho on my left forearm, and, you know, it wouldn’t look good if someone heard me.

And then he’s interviewed - and he looks completely fucking insane by the way. He looks exactly like the kind of guy you’d imagine saying the things I just let you know he said. He looks, I’m not kidding, a lot like Emperor Palpatine from

Return of the Jedi. He’s been evil and preposterously hateful for so long he looks like an evil fuck.

And at one point in the interview, Alysin reminds him that he denies the holocaust and he gets pissed and says, “Yes I deny the holocaust, it’s an extortion racket! Pure and simple! If you did any honest investigation into the holocaust you’d realize it’s nothing more than an international extortion racket run by the Jews to bleed, blackmail, extort, and terrorize their enemy.”

He is committed to this agenda. You can tell he believes it totally. And that’s scary. What’s scarier is how many other dumbfucks out on the interwebs believe and support him. This is the kind of shit we have to keep fighting. This is why this segment stays in the podcast. Being open minded is great, hearing other opinions are wonderful, BUT, when those opinions are aggressively racist and vile and based on nothing but hateful rhetoric and lies we have to shut that shit down!!! Fuck these idiots. To act like what they say is okay is to tacitly support them.

PieceOfShit Blackfor88 posts, “Wonder when they are gonna disable the comments. We all know they cant have this many comments from people agreeing with a "nazi" speaking some undeniable truth.”

Right numb nuts, because suppressing the truth is part of the “liberal media agenda”. I’m so tired of that phrase. The “media agenda” is about selling fear for higher ratings. And I don’t see it changing anytime soon. The more worked up you

get about what they’re pushing, the more you watch, and the more money they get for ads. They don’t give a fuck about catering to Jewish propaganda unless that were A) a thing and B) made them a lot of money.

User Dat Doo posts “To find out who rules over you, find who you are not allowed to criticize”.

Now - I thought that quote was from Voltaire and pretty cool the first time I heard it - I just heard it for the first time on the Tin Foil Hat Podcast last week - turns out it’s from Kevin Alfred Strom, another Holocaust Denier and White Nationalist. Damn it!! The suspected source of the quote is Strom’s 1993 essay, All America Must Know the Terror that is Upon Us. Kevin, by the way, also plead guilty to a child pornography charge in 2008.

The quote does sound cool and in a different context I’d agree with it. You are allowed to criticize Jews, but, when you criticize all of them as a collective group - you’re being racist. Just like if you were to criticize all blacks or all whites or all of any racial group. How do you not understand that? Oh, I know, because you’re an ignorant racist.

5. User Doc Hall posts “She's the ignorant one. All that college and still no brains to think for herself.” Uh huh.

6. Aptly named racist Kevin White posts, “I wanted to donate money to fund Arthur Jones' campaign for Congress of the state of Illinois but apparently the only way to donate to contribute to his campaign is to pay through Paypal which is

owned by a Jewish merchant Max Levchin. When I attempted to donate to his campaign through JewPal I received a prompt indicating that the recipient is currently unable to receive money. Does anyone know how to circumvent the Jewish controlled system so we can contribute to his campaign?”

“Jewpal”? First time I’ve head that one. This guy just clearly thinks some secret Jewish group controls everything. I’m sure he’s a real joy to be around.

Ricky Randy: “No way Rodney Bobby!! I ain’t buying no Jew Ford. I ain’t taking no Jew bus either. Not getting in an Jew- ber Uber neither.”

Rodney Bobby: “Well then how are we getting to the Toby Keith concert Ricky Randy??”

Ricky Randy: “We’re walking Rodney Bobby!”

Rodney Bobby: “On the side of the damn road??”

Ricky Randy: “Hell no! I ain’t walking on new Jew aspahult. I ain’t walking on new jew walk. We’re going through the woods on our own two Aryan legs, and we’ll swing through the trees on our Aryan arms if we see any Jew Prints.”

And the SUPPORT for this asshole politician just goes on and on in the thread.

7. And then User Martin Hyizna roasts all of the anti-semites with a one sentence jab that sums up the true motivation behind their hate, saying “Envy is the root of anti Semitism.”

Touche! Well put.

And then immediately about 30 other users shit on him with posts the equivalent of “no, Martin. Jews are the Antichrist! Simple as that.”

And this is why we did today’s episode! There is a dangerous amount of ignorance out there! The holocaust or it’s equivalent could easily happen again. Maybe again with the Jews or maybe to whatever race you happen to be, dear Timesuckers. So DO NOT LISTEN TO DARTH VADER - DO NOT “GIVE YOURSELF TO THE DARK SIDE”! DO NOT GIVE IN TO THESE IDIOTS OF THE INTERNET!

PAUSE IDIOTS OF THE INTERNET OUTRO

VIII. Conclusions A. The Bielskis were amazing, fighting the Nazis during the Holocaust that for sure happened. Not only did they save over 1200 members of their group, they also did stuff like have known Nazi informers assassinated in the area to prevent those informers from handing over other Jewish people hiding in places even they didn’t know about. They raided the homes of Nazi sympathizers to build an arsenal of guns. They did all of this when they should of been grieving the loss of their parents, siblings, children, and wives.

And what happened to them after the war?

B. Where are they now? 1. Tuvia: After the war, Tuvia and his wife, Lila "Lilka" Tiktin, who also survived the war, went to Israel via Romania, and ultimately immigrated to the United States in 1956. They joined another Bielski brother who didn’t fight with them but survived the war, older brother Walter, in New York, where he had gone before the war started. Tuvia and Zus ran a small trucking firm in New York City for 30 years. He and Lilka remained married for the remainder of their lives and had three children: sons Michael and Robert, and daughter Ruth, and ten grandchildren. Granddaughter Sharon Rennert made a documentary about her family called In Our Hands: The Legacy of the Bielski Partisans.

When Tuvia died in 1987 at the age of 81, he was initially buried on Long Island; one year after his death, his remains were exhumed and taken to Jerusalem, where he was given a state funeral with full military honors in 1988.

2. Zus: After the war, Zus initially moved to Israel with Tuvia and Lilka and his own wife he met at the Bielski camp, Sonia.

He died of cardiac arrest in Brooklyn at age 82 in 1995. He was survived by his wife Sonia, sons (David, Jay, and Zvi), and

six grandchildren. Jay served in the Israel Defense Force as a volunteer during the 1973 war, and Zvi served in the Israeli paratroopers during the Lebanon incursion. Matthew and Elan, Jay's sons, served in a Special Forces unit within the elite Israeli paratroopers.

3. Asael: After the Soviet occupation of the area and their freedom, Asael joined the Soviet Red Army, and six months later he was killed in the Battle of Königsberg of 1945. He never lived to see his daughter Assaela, whom he had fathered with Chaja, a woman he met at the Bielski camp who he married before heading out to fight again.

4. Aron: Aron Bielski, now known as Aron Bell, is still alive. He’s 90 years old and living in Palm Beach, Florida. He worked for his brothers, Tuvia and Zus, in New York for a time in their trucking business. He and his first wife Judith, had 3 children and 12 grandchildren. And then he remarried. And, I’m guessing, if he knows about Illinois Holocaust denier Arthur Jones, he hates his fucking guts.

Time for Top Five Takeaways.

PAUSE TOP FIVE TAKEAWAYS INTRO

IX. Top Five Takeaways 1. More than 20,000 descendants of the survivors the Bielski’s helped save are alive today, including Trump Son-in-Law Jared Kushner. He and Ivanka’s three children, President

Trump’s grandkids, wouldn’t be here without the Bielskis.

2. The 2008 Daniel Craig film Defiance is based on the Bielski brothers and, I gotta say, a damn good movie.

3. The Bielski’s oversaw the building of a hidden town in the woods where over 1200 Jewish men, women, and children were not only hiding, but working, dancing, sleeping in actual walled in structures, and even falling in love while the war raged around them.

4. Illinois politician Arthur Jones is a disgusting piece of shit.

5. Rumors of War Crimes: Number five - new info! When Defiance hit theaters, there were controversy regarding the portrayal of the Bielski detachment because there were accusations that they were involved in a massacre of Polish anti-Nazi resistance fighters by pro-Soviet partisans at Naliboki forest in eastern Poland on May 8, 1943, claiming that the Bielskis were stationed 37 miles (60km) from the area at that time. Some felt that they killed not only Nazis but some of their fellow Polish citizens and that they should of been brought up on war crimes. However, historians feel that they were either not involved or, if they were, that they were not able to stop Russian forces from killing these other freedom fighters. They were never charged for anything but I thought it worth mentioning in case you did your own research and saw those headlines pop up.

PAUSE TOP FIVE TAKEAWAYS

X. Closing announcements A. The Bielski Brothers have been sucked. Sucked dry. Sucked so good. Solid brother sucking. And that’s not weird at all to say out loud.

Now go out there and grab some tickets to my Flat Earth tour.

At Hilarities in Cleveland, Ohio next weekend, March 22-24th. Get it!

So many more shows up at www.dancummins.tv. Check out those dates and snatch up some tickets.

B. Thanks to Harmony Vellekamp, Jesse Dobner and the entire Timesuck team.

Special, special thanks to Bojangles Research team member and my sister Donna Hale for coming up with today’s topic and kicking off the research. Happy to have this topic as part of the Suck Lore now.

And thanks for all the reviews and spreading the suck!! Post on social media. Reference it on Reddit. Spreading that sweet Suck. Every review helps.

C. Next Monday’s episode - back in the Suck Dungeon to record it - the second Space Lizard vote winner - Chernobyl! We’re going nuclear! We’re going back to Russia. We just can’t seem to stay out of Eastern Europe for very long. Not sure what the Hell that is about. Guessing Chikatilo may show up in his homeland. Guessing we’re gonna learn a lot about how radiation works and if it’s safe to be around Chernobyl or not today. A nuclear reactor melted down back in 1986 and people are still speculating today about how much damage has been caused because of it. Do a bunch of animals now have multiple heads? How many super heros were created? So much to find out next week.

And let’s find out what you Suckers have been up to with this week’s Timesucker Updates.

PAUSE TIMESUCKER UPDATES

XI. Timesucker Updates A. This first one seemed pertinent to this week’s suck and it comes in from Sucker Ben! Ben writes:

Dear Sucklord Dan, I have listen to your comedy albums for a few years now and am actually listening to one of your podcasts while typing this. I just listen to your comments on black lives and how you see them as a justified group. While I agree with the other movements for the black community the Black lives matter movement themselves has been labelled as a terrorist organization by the FBI for its destruction of Black communities and large cities. I have lived in Charlotte all my life and was around for the riots and saw the aftermath didn’t solve anything.

I am not saying that blacks haven’t struggled in the past but they aren’t particularly suffering in the same way. White people are actually killed by police more often then blacks, those don’t make it on the news as much because it’s not as interesting I feel (but that’s only my opinion). I’m also not saying what has caused these protests are were good by any means but riots and destruction are no way to react. Sorry for making this email so long and I appreciate your open mindedness you are truly awesome and one of the funniest people ever, your podcast really speaks to me.

Again sorry for the long email and I hope to see you in Charlotte and REJECT ThE TeMPtrEsses LUCIFINIA yOUr mind and don’t

turn in to an everyday Chicitillo, may you ride away from her on Bojangles and may his speed be powered by Nimrod. Sincerely long time fan and new time sucker, Ben

Thank you Ben! Yes - I have heard from other listeners that various members of the Black Lives Matter organization are in fact terribly racist and destructive and that’s too bad. I’ve also heard some are openly racist against whites which is sad. Hating any color of people is racist.

Regarding moe whites being killed by police than blacks - that is technically true but also a misinterpretation of the data.

Here’s the results of some 2017 data released by Newsweek on Dec. 29th, 2017.

Police in the U.S. killed 1,129 people so far in 2017, and a quarter of those killed were black—even though they comprise just 13 percent of the population, according to a new report. In addition to being 25 percent of the victims, black people are also three times as likely to be killed by police as white people, according to the report, “Mapping Police Violence,” which was released Thursday.

So, you see, while the total number may be higher, it’s only because there are WAY more white people in America than black people. The total number doesn’t matter - the percentage does. And if the percentage is three times as high- that’s alarming. And that’s why there is so much uproar.

But to circle back to your original point - yes, I didn’t realize the

BLM movement was associated with so much negativity AND your right about the media - I think they’re guilty of sensationalism all the time - and certain crimes are sexier than others. And I think both black crime and the police reaction to black crime gets too much attention. Spread it around like the TV show Cops does.

Anyone else besides still watch that show? The Cops on Cops bust people of all colors and I love it. The go after white and black and brown dumbshits with equal gusto. Afros and mullets represented. It’s great.

B. This update from Bradi Treier cracked me the Hell up:

The Order of WHAT??? just listening to the Aleister Crowley episode and I swear to Nimrod the first 5 times you said it, I heard "The Order of the Golden Dong". The worst part is I thought it was fitting for him and didn't question it for those first 5 times!!! It's clearly way too early for me to listen to the Suck. Keep on bringing the Suck no matter what time of day. sincerely, Mme Dr. Bradi Treier Esq. VII

Haha! Hilarious. And you’re name is the best.

Next update is a very kind one from Timesucker Lex! C. hey Dan I'm going to try to make this quick. I'm using the Android app so sorry for ant auto correct bullshit. i just wanted to let you know that you have made a major improvement on my depression. I've been dealing with it on and off for years. these past two years have been really difficult with the hurricane and some family issues. I told my girlfriend that I was depressed

again and she told me that if I feel like hurting myself i need to get help or at least call the suicide hotline. thanks to you and the Cobain episode I feel like I had the perfect answer to this. I told her "don't worry I won't try. I really don't want to end up in Nimrods asshole" this podcast has been the perfect way for me to distract myself when I get down and I love learning new shit. can't wait to see you in San Antonio. oh and I'm a space lizard and I just listed to the 5th episode with your wife letting us know that she will be assisting you with the podcast. she's like the anti lucifina. so all hail Saint Lynze unless that offends her then my bad but thanks for helping with the suck. keep on suckin Lex

Wow! Thanks Lex! I love how happy this makes you dude. I don’t want you ending up in Nimrod’s butthole either. Don’t let Lucifina trick you into wandering in there. Begone Lucifina!

And Saint Lynze - I think she’ll like that very much. Although, she for sure has a little Lucifina in her as well. I like it. There’s a reason I have a tattoo of a half-angel half-devil lady on my shoulder.

You keep on fucking sucking too Lex!

D. And one more from a Norse sucker writing in about the Norse Episode last week:

Hi I'm a listener from and in Iceland, found the podcast on reddit, and have been listening non stop since then. I loved the norse god episode. Was afraid of some butchering mythology but it was of course well researched and very well done. I just wanted to ad that Loki's father in the Marvel movie was a frost

giant named Laufey, but that's a female name (like mine, ends in ey) that is the only thing that bothered me in the Marvel movies, and I can't recall if you mentioned that point. Also your pronunciation was good, I especially noticed my sibling's names Freyja (the j is silent) and Sturla (as in Snorri Sturluson). My sister has no problems with her name outside the country, but my brother gave up on making peaple say his outside the country. Keep on doing a great show, love the Nimrod, bojengels, lucifina and the juju comic side stories. Also you have gotten me a couple of time with the made up stories, wich I love. Thank you and hopefully I get to see your shows one day.

And then, after all those kind words about pronunciation, I seem to have no idea how to say your name. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gN2du-C7Png

Valey Jökulsdóttir (Yo-gull-stot-ture) Is that right? I found an Icelandic author that shares your surname. I love that your listening in Iceland - I so want to go there someday. Really, really want to go there. Gotta make it to Snori sturluson’s old stomping ground. Gotta track me down a spider horse to ride.

Thanks for listening Valey - spread the word over there so I can do an Iceland show!

PAUSE TIMESUCKER UPDATES!

XII. Goodbye A. Well, that’s all for today Timesucker gals and guys. Don’t deny the holocaust and do be sure to grab your discount at

Chikatilo’s Wrasslin Academy - support our sponsors and keep on suckin’!

XIII.Sources: Defiance by Nechama Tec http://www.latimes.com/world/europe/la-fg-belarus-kushner-2017- story.html https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Navahrudak http://novogrudok.by/ https://www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php?ModuleId=10005059 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lE46oEXXs58 https://www.ushmm.org/exhibition/personal-history/media_oi.php? MediaId=2867 https://www.amazon.com/One-Survivor-Remembers-HBO/dp/ B00ZK8B1O6 https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/vdxzd4/exploring-bobby- fischers-maniacal-racist-genius-915 https://www.cbsnews.com/news/oskar-groening-nazi-guard-at- auschwitz-death-camp-heads-to-trial-in-germany/ https://www.cbsnews.com/news/oskar-groening-nazi-guard-at- auschwitz-death-camp-heads-to-trial-in-germany/ http://opensiuc.lib.siu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi? article=1012&context=legacy https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ilse_Koch http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/ilse-koch http://www.history.com/this-day-in-history/the-witch-of-buchenwald-is- sentenced-to-prison https://academic.oup.com/gh/article-abstract/19/3/369/680819 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Josef_Mengele www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php?ModuleId=10007060

https://www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php?ModuleId=10008193 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=be7QR4pesbg (excellent first and second accounts in this documentary from survivors and children of the brothers), https://www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php? ModuleId=10007563 , https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bielski_partisans , http://www.yadvashem.org/yv/en/education/newsletter/28/ bielski_brothers.asp https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Navahrudak https://www.theholocaustexplained.org/life-in-nazi-occupied-europe/ ghettos-an-overview/why-did-the-nazis-establish- ghettos/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naliboki_forest https://www.preceden.com/timelines/301192-bielski-brothers-timeline

https://ballotpedia.org/Arthur_Jones https://pjmedia.com/election/theres-nazi-ballot-illinois-gop-let-happen/ http://artjonesforcongressman.com/

https://nationalvanguard.org/2017/01/voltaire-didnt-say-it/ http://www.newsweek.com/police-shootings-killings-us-unarmed- black-reform-michael-brown-764787 XIV.

A.