DOCSLIB.ORG

Girls' Narratives of Contemporary Bat Mitzvah

Total Page：16

File Type：pdf, Size：1020Kb

Download full-text PDF Read full-text
Girls' Narratives of Contemporary Bat Mitzvah A Ma’yan Research Report December 2013 It’s actually a pretty big deal Girls’ narratives of contemporary Bat Mitzvah “a Bat Mitzvah and all of its aspects should fall in the middle: not too showy or plain; not too cheerful or glum…it’s all about the balance. The Bat Mitzvah dress should be like a bridesmaid dress: not too covered or revealing, not too noticeable or too plain, and most of all, it should not distract from the real reason everyone is there: to watch you grow up.” -p. 11 Table of Contents Contributors 1 Introduction Written by Beth Cooper Benjamin, Ed.D., 2 Research Methods Director of Research, Ma’yan 3 Narrative Themes: Bat Mitzvah Research conducted by as.. Ma’yan Research Training Interns: • as a Source of Pride and Elana Blanchard, Rachel Fraade, Pressure Talia Friedman, Cece Nealon-Sha- • as a Social and Interpersonal piro, Aiden Reis, Rivka Rosenblatt, Experience Yafi Shafer-Sull, Sydney Watnick, • as Spiritual and Cultural Ex and Hillary Weinberger perience • as Performance and Expres and Ma’yan staff: Beth Cooper sion Femininity: Focusing on Benjamin, Ed.D., Jodie Gordon, Story Stem #2 and Rabbi Alissa Wise 4 Discussion and Implications 5 References 6 Appendix A: The Survey Instru- ment 7 Appendix B: Thematic Analysis Matrix Ma’yan provides social justice, feminist, and leadership training to teen girls and teaches vital skills to parents and educators. Ma’yan is a program of the JCC in Manhattan. Find out more at www.mayan.org Introduction: to observe Bnai Mitzvah on Saturday morning.3 Some families (particularly those who may not be affiliated In 2009, Ma’yan’s Research Training Internship (RTI) with a synagogue or other Jewish institution) have conducted research to learn how contemporary Jew- begun crafting very individualized Bat Mitzvah rituals, ish girls experience and understand the Bat Mitz- which can involve a family trip to Israel or an experi- vah. Over the course of 14 months, nine Jewish girls ence in nature. In most of these contexts, individual in grades 9-11 from the New York City metropolitan Bat Mitzvah observances can include any number of region worked as a collaborative research team with other ritual components, including leading additional their Ma’yan staff advisors to read existing research, services (e.g., Havdalah4) or prayers (such as the Motzi draft a research question, develop an original survey, or kiddush5 at a meal), or wearing a tallit or tefillin6 for collect data, and analyze the results. the first time. In much of the United States today, the Bar Following the religious service (and very occa- and Bat Mitzvah seem nearly ubiquitous and virtually sionally, in lieu of it), girls and their families typically in- indistinguishable. The event is so broadly recognized— vite guests to a social (often secular) celebration. This even envied—that it has been appropriated as non- can range from a kiddush7 held at a synagogue to a Jewish “faux mitzvah” and “black mitzvah” celebra- lavish evening party held at an event space. These cel- tions (e.g., Tresniowski, 2004; Bernstein, 2004). From ebrations, seen as an expression of the girl’s identity this vantage point, it is extraordinary to recognize that and interests, can also assume very different forms, less than 100 years ago, there was no such thing as a from a large dance party at a night club to a weekend ritual Bat Mitzvah. While the practice of Bar Mitzvah camping trip with a small group of friends. observance dates back to at least the medieval pe- Recognizing the Bat Mitzvah’s extraordinary riod, the Bat Mitzvah is an entirely modern invention. history and its rich variety, Ma’yan felt it was ripe for The first Bat Mitzvah ritual was observed by Judith some critical examination. What has it become in its Kaplan, the then-twelve year-old daughter of Rabbi ninety-odd year history? How has its widespread ac- Mordechai Kaplan, the founder of the Reconstruc- ceptance in the past generation or two changed how tionist movement, at his encouragement. In a mere girls today experience it? What might Bat Mitzvah blip of historic time, it has grown from a fringe-radical mean to girls who don’t see it as an issue of access or experiment to a nearly universal rite of passage for right, but as a simple expression of the gender par- Jewish girls in the U.S. and beyond. ity they have been raised to expect? And in a mod- Today, while Bat Mitzvah is widely practiced ern context in which twelve and thirteen year-olds and accepted, its expression and enactment vary become ritually and halachically8 “adult” long before widely according to affiliation, geography, family, local they attain other benefits and responsibilities of adult norms, individual preferences, and other factors. For status, what does it mean for a girl to become a Jew- most girls, the Bat Mitzvah includes both ritual and celebratory aspects. Almost universally, the Bat Mitz- 3 Even some progressive Orthodox synagogues now vah as an event is a culmination of many months of hold Shabbat-morning Bat Mitzvah rituals that include Torah study and preparation, either individually (e.g., with reading. 4 Havdalah: The ceremony that marks the end of a tutor) and/or collectively (in Hebrew school). At a Shabbat or other Jewish holidays and ushers in a new week. 1 Bat Mitzvah service, girls typically stand at the bimah 5 The blessings offered over bread (Motzi) and wine and chant from the Torah. Many give a D’var Torah2 or (kiddush) before a meal. other speech to the congregation. In Orthodox com- 6 Ritual garments worn during prayer, mandated for munities, a Bat Mitzvah may be observed during Fri- observant Jewish men, sometimes adopted by observant day evening services, but in more progressive denomi- women: a tallit is a prayer shawl; tefillin are small leather nations, the norm has become for girls (as for boys) boxes containing Torah texts placed on the upper arm and the head with straps. 1 Bimah: The raised platform or dais from which one 7 In addition to the prayer over wine (see Footnote #4, reads Torah in a synagogue. above), Kiddush can also refer to refreshments served after 2 D’var Torah: A talk reflecting on the weekly Torah Shabbat (Sabbath) services, either in a synagogue or at home. portion. 8 Halachically: According to Jewish law (halakah). 3 ish woman? Because its expansion has been so suc- of contemporary B’nai Mitzvah, Thirteen and a Day: cessful, the Bat Mitzvah itself is often assumed to be The Bar and Bat Mitzvah Across America (2005), and a successful or unproblematic ritual and cultural prac- interviewed family members and clergy to give histori- tice. But is it really working for girls today? How would cal context to our individual experiences. We identi- we know if we didn’t ask? fied pressing questions and devised an online survey. In addition, data from our previous Research We recruited participants and interpreted the data. Training Internship (where we conducted a broad sur- Finally, we presented our initial findings to a gather- vey on the beliefs and attitudes of Jewish American ing of Jewish communal professionals and parents, teen girls) indicated that for many contemporary Jew- and received feedback and reflections from other re- ish teen girls, the Bat Mitzvah becomes a key com- searchers who have written about Bat Mitzvah. This ponent of their Jewish lives and identities (Benjamin, report presents an expanded and refined version of 2009). Our data were tantalizing, but limited, and the initial analysis our research team conducted. we wanted to learn more. So we invited our second cohort of Research Training Interns to learn with us, Research Methods: bringing their critical investigative lenses as well as their own experiences of contemporary Bat Mitzvah. Girls ages 11-15 in New York, New Jersey, and Connect- icut were invited to participate in an online survey Participatory Action Research about “Jewish girls’ attitudes and experiences related to Bat Mitzvah.” As the survey was fairly long and The RTI is grounded in the principles of Partic- writing-intensive, a $5 Amazon gift card was offered ipatory Action Research (PAR), a research paradigm as a reward for completion. Of the 108 who initiated designed to engage members of a group being studied the survey, 46 did not complete it and were eliminated in the process of defining, producing, and interpret- from the analysis. Four other responses were omitted ing research about their own community. It’s a way of from analysis because they did not meet the inclusion shifting the traditional power relationship in social sci- criteria (they lived outside the tri-state region or did ence research, where typically, academic researchers not meet age requirements). frame the questions and decide what the data mean In total, 58 responses were included in the anal- and how the results will be used. ysis. Of these, 37 were post-Bat Mitzvah, representing PAR has been used generally in communities nearly 2/3 (64%) of the sample, while the remaining 21 where structural inequality disenfranchises marginal- (36%) were still approaching their Bat Mitzvah. While ized people from informing policies that affect their ages ranged from 11-15, the mean age in our sample lives. The girls Ma’yan works with in many ways defy was 13.2 years. The vast majority of participants came this profile; they are typically white and affluent and from New York (41, or 71%), while 15% (8) lived in New experience significant structural privilege. But despite Jersey and 5% (3) in Connecticut.
Load more

Recommended publications
  • The Bar and Bat Mitzvah Services 12
    TEMPLE BETH EMETH Table of Contents Contact Us 2 Welcome Letter 3 Bar and Bat Mitzvah Brit (Covenant) 4 What is a Bat or Bar Mitzvah? 6 The Brit (Covenant) Explained: TBE Commitment 7 The Brit (Covenant) Explained: Bat or Bar Mitzvah Commitment 10 The Bar and Bat Mitzvah Services 12 After Your Bat or Bar Mitzvah 14 Shabbat Weekend Honors, Opportunities, and Obligations 16 Bar or Bat Mitzvah Logistics 17 Glossary 21 Service- and Celebration-related Checklists 26 Appendix A: Hosting the Saturday Congregational Kiddush 30 Appendix B: Hosting a Private Celebration at TBE 31 Appendix C: Resources for Hosting a Bat or Bar Mitzvah Celebration at TBE 32 Appendix D: Mitzvah Project Opportunities for TBE Bat and Bar Mitzvah Students 34 Appendix E: Usher Instructions 36 Appendix F: Additional Resources 38 For any questions or concerns not addressed within this guide, please contact Cantor Hayut. 1 Contact Us Call the Temple’s phone number: (734) 665-4744 Fax: 734-665-9237 Website: http://www.templebethemeth.org Hours: Mon-Thurs: 9am - 5pm Fri: 9am - 3pm Staff Josh Whinston, Rabbi Ext: 212 [email protected] Regina S. Lambert-Hayut, Cantor Ext: 227 [email protected] Rabbi Daniel Alter, Director of Education Ext: 207 [email protected] Clergy Assistant Ext: 210 Melissa Sigmond, Executive Director Ext: 206 [email protected] Mike Wolf, Genesis Administrator Ext: 200 [email protected] www.genesisa2.org For any questions or concerns not addressed within this guide, please contact Cantor Hayut. 2 Dear Bar and/or Bat Mitzvah Family, Mazel tov as you begin this exciting journey! The celebration of a child becoming Bat or Bar Mitzvah is one of the highlights in the life cycle of a Jewish family.
    [Show full text]
  • Midway Jewish Center Bar and Bat Mitzvah Guide Page 2
    LET’S START PLANNING A—BAR/T MITZVAH BAT & BAR MITZVAH THE ULTIMATE MJC GUIDE FOR BAR/BAT MITZVAH Perry Raphael Rank Rabbi Joel Levenson Associate Rabbi Lisa Stein Director of Education Sandi Bettan Preschool Director Genea Moore Synagogue Administrator Michael Kohler President Howard Rosen Ritual Committee Chair Office Phone (516) 938-8390 Office Fax (516) 938-3906 E-Mail [email protected] Revised December, 2016 / Kislev, 5777 Midway Jewish Center Bar and Bat Mitzvah Guide Page 2 TABLE OF CONTENTS INTRODUCTION 3 WHAT IS BAR/T MITZVAH? 3 HOW MUCH OF THE SERVICE OUR CHILDREN WILL KNOW 4 WHY WE TEACH WHAT WE TEACH 4 RABBIS' ROLES 5 THE TUTORS' ROLES 5 TIMETABLE FOR THE BAR/T MITZVAH EXPERIENCE 7 HELPING OUR CHILDREN BECOME RESPONSIBLE JEWS 7 EDUCATIONAL AND RELIGIOUS REQUIREMENTS 8 THE DIRECTIONS / DECORUM CARD 9 BAR/T MITZVAH INVITATION DISPLAY POLICY 9 HONORS 10 KIDDUSH 10 SE'UDAH SHEL MITZVAH—A MEAL EMANATING FROM A MITZVAH 10 SYNAGOGUE DECORUM 10 A TZEDAKKAH OPPORTUNITY 11 SOME TERMS YOU OUGHT TO KNOW 12 AN ALIYAH: IT’S AN HONOR -- BUT WHAT DO I DO? 18 Midway Jewish Center Bar and Bat Mitzvah Guide Page 3 INTRODUCTION Is it hard to believe that your child will soon become a Bar or Bat Mitzvah? You might as well brace yourself now. That little boy or girl that just yesterday was strapped into a car seat is today getting all set for adolescence. Our children begin to go through some dramatic changes, physically and emotionally, at the age of thirteen. The rabbis were wise in choosing this age as the proper time for becoming Bar/t Mitzvah.
    [Show full text]
  • Kol Shalom Bar/Bat Mitzvah Guidelines
    Kol Shalom Bar/Bat Mitzvah Guidelines Introduction: Bar/Bat Mitzvah Ceremony in Perspective A Bar or Bat Mitzvah is a public acknowledgment that a boy or girl has become a responsible adult member of the Jewish community. It is an important step in the transition to adulthood and the acceptance of responsibility for one’s own actions. As a public expression, the ceremony takes place in the context of a normal worship service at which a portion from the Torah is read and a Haftarah is chanted. During the course of that service, the Bar or Bat Mitzvah is given the opportunity to demonstrate that he or she has acquired the requisite skills to fulfill the obligations of a Jewish adult. We must stress the fact that the ceremony is part of our regular Shabbat service and not a separate, private ceremony for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah family alone. That enables our entire worshipping community to celebrate the life cycle with family and friends. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah brings honor to him or herself by the manner in which he or she participates in the service. Since Kol Shalom is an egalitarian congregation, participation in the service is not dependent on the gender of the student nor is there any limit to the extent of that participation. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah at Kol Shalom is an event for the congregation as well as for the family. We all look forward to sharing the joy, as our children become young adults. Scheduling the Bar/Bat Mitzvah 1. Families must be members of Kol Shalom when the Bar/Bat Mitzvah is scheduled and must remain members through the time of the ceremony itself.
    [Show full text]
  • Bar and Bat Mitzvah Temple Israel Sanctuary
    Temple Israel Sanctuary The Ark, which is the central focus of the sanctuary, houses the Torah scrolls. Its doors MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE are carved with the Burning Bush. This represents a particularly moving moment in the early history of our people, when Moses accepted God’s mission and led the Jewish people out of Egypt to Sinai. The brilliantly hued tapestry within the Ark represents Bar and Bat Mitzvah the form of the Ark doors. The Hebrew letter Shin,which signifies the word Shaddai, meaning God, is sculpted into the center of the Ark doors. The term bar/bat mitzvah means son/daughter of mitzvah. According to Judaism, at the age of 13 an individual can now take on additional religious The Ten Commandment Tablets appear above the doors of the Ark. They represent the privileges and responsibilities. Mitzvot, literally commandments, are the fulfillment of God’s promise to Moses at the Burning Bush and are the guiding precept responsibilities of a Jew. Before reaching the age of bar or bat mitzvah, for the daily life of every Jew. The Eternal Light, symbolic of the Jew’s ongoing spirit, is children voluntarily perform mitzvot. Followingbar/bat mitzvah, mitzvot placed above the Tablets. From its form, a torch, we infer light permeating darkness, become obligatory. In this regard, the idea of fulfilling the commandments just as the Torah has illuminated the life of every Jew throughout the ages. suggests accepting responsibility as an adult. This is sacred and deserving of The stone mosaic wall on either side of the Ark symbolizes the wings of an angel.
    [Show full text]
  • The Bar/Bat Mitzvah Handbook
    Congregation Beth Israel BAR/BAT MITZVAH GUIDE 2021-2022 301 East Jefferson Street Charlottesville, Virginia 22902 (434) 295-6382 www.cbicville.org 1 WELCOME Mazal Tov to you and your child for deciding to pursue a course of study that will lead to a public celebration of his/her becoming a Bar/Bat Mitzvah! This handbook will provide you with information about the process of preparing for becoming Bar/Bat Mitzvah at Congregation Beth Israel. “Bar/Bat Mitzvah” is a noun. It refers to a person who has become responsible for the mitzvot (the commandments or imperatives of Jewish life). When your child becomes a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, the Jewish community will begin to see her/him more as an adult and less as a child. S/he will be counted in a minyan, s/he will be eligible to be called for an aliyah, and s/he will begin to be expected to make thoughtful choices about the mitzvot of daily life. One of the important mitzvot about which s/he will make a choice, concerns continuing Jewish education in the post-Bar/Bat Mitzvah program including culminating with Confirmation and graduation in 12th grade. In our opinion, if a Bar or Bat Mitzvah celebration at the age of 13 marks the end-point of Jewish study, it is comparable to dropping out of school after completing elementary school. It is a tragic loss of opportunity to learn and continue to explore, on a more mature level, what it means to live a Jewish life. We certainly hope you will encourage your child to continue his/her Jewish education, not only in our post-Bar/Bat Mitzvah program, but also throughout life.
    [Show full text]
  • TC Sisterhood to Hold Feb. 26 Program on Women of Reform
    February 10-16, 2017 Published by the Jewish Federation of Greater Binghamton Volume XLVI, Number 6 BINGHAMTON, NEW YORK “Facing Fakery: Journalism’s Challenge” to be topic at Feb. 11 Beth David Shabbat luncheon By Paula Rubin “Jeff Platsky, the featured speaker, is no a B.A. in newspapers from Syracuse Uni- ing as president for the last six. He and his “Facing Fakery: Journalism’s Chal- stranger to journalism or Jewish values,” versity and an M.B.A. from Binghamton family reside in Binghamton, where both lenge” will be the topic at the Beth organizers noted. University. His journalism career started of his children graduated from Bingham- David Shabbat luncheon on February Platsky has been with Gannett Central in Northern Maine and later on offered ton University and are currently pursuing 11, following services at Beth David New York Newspapers for the past 36 him a chance to witness “The Miracle on careers in business. Synagogue, 39 Riverside Dr., Bing- years. He worked as a bureau reporter Ice” during the 1980 Winter Olympics in For more information about the lun- hamton. The entire community has been and currently as an investigative/content Lake Placid. cheons or how to sponsor all or part of any invited to services, the free luncheon editor. A native of Queens, he attended He has been on the Jewish Community luncheon for any reason, call Beth David and the talk. New York City public schools, received Center board for more than 10 years, serv- Synagogue at 772-1793. TC Sisterhood to hold Feb. 26 program on Women of Reform Judaism By Helene Philips Women of Reform Judaism, founded in Temple Concord Sisterhood is part of includes “creative, inspirational” Shabbat Temple Concord Sisterhood will present 1913, is the women’s affiliate of the Union the Northeast District of WRJ, one of eight services with traditional and new music, the program “Why Women of Reform Juda- of Reform Judaism, the central body of districts in North America, and includes Torah discussions and Shabbat workshops.
    [Show full text]
  • Jewish Wisconsin 5775-5776/2014-2015
    A GUIDE TO Jewish Wisconsin 5775-5776/2014-2015 Your connection to Jewish Arts, Culture, Education, Camping and Religious Life Welcome from the Publisher Hannah Rosenthal Daniel Bader Welcome to A Guide to Jewish Wisconsin 5775-5776/ We also invite you to learn more about The Chronicle by 2014-2015, a publication of The Wisconsin Jewish visiting JewishChronicle.org. Visit MilwaukeeJewish.org Chronicle. The Guide is designed to help newcomers to learn more about the Milwaukee Jewish Federation, become acquainted with our state’s vibrant Jewish which publishes both the Guide and The Chronicle as community and to help current residents get the most free services to our community. out of what our community has to offer. If you are new to the Milwaukee area, please contact We invite you to explore the resources listed in this guide Shalom Milwaukee at the Milwaukee Jewish Federation and to get to know the people behind the organizations (414-390-5700). We are here to help you find a that make our community a rich and relevant place to meaningful Jewish experience in Wisconsin. be Jewish. We hope you will form strong connections, create new opportunities and find your place to thrive. Hannah Rosenthal Daniel Bader CEO/President Chair Connect with your Jewish Community online and in print. For your free subscription contact Tela Bissett at (414) 390-5720 or [email protected]. To advertise, contact Jane Dillon at (414) 390-5765 or [email protected]. JewishChronicle.org Welcome from the Publisher n 1 The Wisconsin Table of Contents WELCOME FROM THE PUBLISHER ................
    [Show full text]
  • Jewish Families and Mixed Marriage
    Double or Nothing? mn Double or published by university press of new england hanover and london po po Nothing? Jewish Families and Mixed Marriage Sylvia Barack Fishman BRANDEIS UNIVERSITY PRESS nm Brandeis University Press Published by University Press of New England, 37 Lafayette St., Lebanon, NH 03766 © 2004 by Brandeis University Press All rights reserved Printed in the United States of America 54321 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Fishman, Sylvia Barack, 1942– Double or nothing? : Jewish familes and mixed marriage / Sylvia Barack Fishman. p. cm.—(Brandeis series in American Jewish history, culture, and life) (Brandeis series on Jewish Women) Includes bibliographical references and index. ISBN 1–58465–206–3 (cloth : alk. paper) 1. Interfaith marriage—United States. 2. Jews—United States—Social conditions. 3. Jewish families—United States. I. Title. II. Series. III. Series: Brandeis series on Jewish women HQ1031.F56 2004 306.84Ј3Ј0973—dc22 2003021956 Brandeis Series in American Jewish History, Culture, and Life Jonathan D. Sarna, Editor Sylvia Barack Fishman, Associate Editor Leon A. Jick, 1992 The Americanization of the Synagogue, 1820–1870 Sylvia Barack Fishman, editor, 1992 Follow My Footprints: Changing Images of Women in American Jewish Fiction Gerald Tulchinsky, 1993 Taking Root: The Origins of the Canadian Jewish Community Shalom Goldman, editor, 1993 Hebrew and the Bible in America: The First Two Centuries Marshall Sklare, 1993 Observing America’s Jews Reena Sigman Friedman, 1994 These Are Our Children: Jewish
    [Show full text]
  • Rabbi to Rabbi
    RABBI TO RABBI A SELECTION OF CONVERSATIONS BETWEEN RABBI LISA J. GRUSHCOW AND RABBI N. DANIEL KOROBKIN IN THE CANADIAN JEWISH NEWS 2018-5779 Speaking to all on Rosh Hashanah The High Holidays can be a difficult time for some, reopening previous pain, and though not everything can be forgiven, we must seek to release our anguish RABBI N. DANIEL KOROBKIN, BETH AVRAHAM YOSEPH CONGREGATION, TORONTO RABBI LISA GRUSHCOW, TEMPLE EMANU-EL-BETH SHOLOM, MONTREAL September 7, 2017 _______________________________________________________________________________ Rabbi Grushcow: As we come towards Rosh Hashanah, as much as the events of the world concern us, it is clear to me that, above all, people are most concerned with their family relationships. Parents and children, siblings, spouses – all these relationships have their own challenges and their own blessings. For every family that comes together for an honour or shares a meal on the High Holidays, there is another that is distant. For every simchah – a new engagement or a milestone anniversary, a new baby, a new accomplishment – there are those carrying tzuris and feeling loss. I imagine that you, like me, do a significant amount of counselling and pastoral care in the weeks leading up to Rosh Hashanah. But I also think about how we can address some of these varied family realities from the bimah on the Days of Awe. For example, when we invite new parents to bring up their babies, we recall the story of Hannah and recognize the pain of infertility, offering a prayer for all those who hope to conceive. How do you approach these challenges? Rabbi Korobkin: The High Holidays can have the unintended side-effect of reopening old relationship wounds.
    [Show full text]
  • B'nai Mitzvah Handbook
    “Study from love and honor will follow” -Bahya CONGREGATION OR AMI “Light of My People” B’nai Mitzvah Handbook Rabbi Paul J. Kipnes Cantor Doug Cotler Rabbi Julia Weisz Diane Townsend, B’nai Mitzvah Teacher Fred Gruber President CONGREGATION OR AMI 26115 Mureau Road, Suite B, Calabasas, CA 91302 818-880-4880 * www.orami.org * [email protected] Congregation Or Ami B’nai Mitzvah Handbook page 2 Mazel Tov! Dear Bar/Bat Mitzvah Family, You, as a family, are about to experience one of the most significant, Jewish, and highly spiritual adventures of your lifetime. This is a highly emotional journey and, as such, will be filled with some anxiety, but mostly joy. This handbook is designed to relieve some of the anxiety and thereby increase joy of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah experience by answering many of the questions you may have. Although the congregation will do everything possible to prepare your child, family cooperation is essential. Yad b’yad b’yachad (together hand in hand) we can make this significant occasion a cherished memory in the life of your family. We encourage you to read through this handbook, and to use it as a reference book often. Since some synagogue policies may change between now and your child’s Bar/Bat Mitzvah date, you will want to be in touch with the Rabbi and the office as your date approaches. May this be only one of many family simchas (joyous moments) we will share with you! With Excitement, Rabbi Paul Kipnes, Cantor Doug Cotler, Rabbi Julia Weisz, and Diane Townsend Congregation Or Ami B’nai Mitzvah Handbook page 3 Table of Contents Section Page Mazel Tov! ...........................................................................
    [Show full text]
  • Bar / Bat Mitzvah Handbook
    Bar / Bat Mitzvah Handbook http://www.templerodefshalom.org/learn/bnai-mitzvah The PARENT’S Guide PARENT’S Bar/ Bat Mitzvah Timeline Meetings, Activities, and Other Requirements 12 Months Before Service 11-10 Months Before Service Month: Attend required B'Nai Mitzvah Workshop Receive tutoring assignment from Clergy Office • Meet with Cantor and attend service Attend services • Learn about the B'Nai Mitzvah program Do activities for months 11-10 • Receive notebook and Hebrew/Torah assignments • Fill out tutor assisgnment survey 10-7 Months Before Service 6-4 Months Before Service Month: Attend required Social Action Workshop at 9 months After 4 tutoring lessons (~2 months), schedule first Attend required Mitzvah Outing at 8 months Hebrew check with clergy at 6 months Begin tutoring: See clergy for a second Hebrew check at 4 months • At 8 months for a morning service Attend services • At 7 months for an afternoon service Do activities for months 6-4 Attend services Do activities for months 10-7 3 Months Before Service 2-1 Months Before Service Month: Month: See clergy for a first speech appointment at 3 months See clergy for a final speech appointment See clergy for a final Hebrew check (if needed) All Hebrew should be finished Attend services Attend services Do month 3 activity Do activities for months 2-1 Discussion Meeting With Rabbi Schwartzman Wednesday, the week before first rehearsal 4:15PM Meet with Rabbi Schwartzman and partner Date___________________ Rehearsals Morning Service Afternoon Service 2 Tuesdays Before Your Service 2 Thursdays Before Your Service 3:00 PM 3:00 PM Full rehearsal with your partner and the Cantor (parents Full rehearsal with your partner and the Cantor (parents aren't required).
    [Show full text]
  • B'nai Mitzvah Handbook
    B’nai Mitzvah Handbook Rabbi: Aviva Bass Cantorial Soloist: Margaret Schmitt Religious School Director: Dr. Rivka Felsher B’nai Mitzvah Tutor: Andrew Arnold Temple Sinai of Palm Beach County Religious School 2475 W. Atlantic Avenue Delray Beach, Florida 33445 561-276-6161, x119 www.templesinaireligiousschool.com Updated 09/17/16 Becoming a Bar or Bat Mitzvah Bar mitzvah means “son of the commandment”, and bat mitzvah means “daughter of the commandment.” Jewish youth at age 13 become bar or bat mitzvah as they lead a Torah service in their synagogue after years of preparation, guidance, and study in the areas of Jewish values, history, culture, philosophy, and language. Temple Sinai Religious School has a proud history of bar and bat mitzvah education in the Reform tradition. Becoming a bar or bat mitzvah means taking on the religious and civic responsibilities as others in the Jewish community. Some of our communal expectations include: -performing mitzvot (including a 13-hour mitzvah project in the months prior to one’s bar/bat mitzvah), -being counted in a minyan for the purpose of communal prayer, -leading prayer services, -reading from the Torah, -being accountable for one’s moral or ethical behavior, -and with one’s family, becoming a participating member of the Temple Sinai and broader Jewish community. For a Jewish child, the bar or bat mitzvah ceremony is likely the first time s/he takes on the responsibility of preparing to lead within the Jewish community. It is a rite of passage that signals the spiritual transition from child to adult in Jewish life and demonstrates the ability and willingness to be counted among the adult members of the community.
    [Show full text]