What Happened to Shonte Peoples? BY AARON STEELMAN convictions are still under dispute. gations made against him, "'lbey said it at them. And this is while rro in my Peoples was awakened in the early they saw things there was no way apartment above them and they are HONTE PEOPLES, THE morning of February 27 by his girl in the carport. They couldn't see." former University of Michigan friend, who had heard the alarm to Supporting Peoples' claims was S football player involved in a his Jeep Cherokee going off. Peoples physical evidence, or the lack. thereof shooting incident in Ann Arbor on grabbed his Glock 17 pistol and ran to There were no bullets or bullet-holes February 'n, is now a convicted felon. the porch of his upper-level apart discovered near Peoples' Jeep. Peoples was convicted on two colUlts ment. It is at this point that Peoples' Nonetheless, Peoples was charged offelonious assault by a Washtenaw story and the one told by the Ann with two counts of felonious assault. County Circuit Court jury on July 21 . Arbor Police Department (AAPD) con He was offered a plea bargain of one Peoples, who now plays for the flict. COlUlt OffelOniOUB assault, but refused Las Vegas Posse of the Canadian Foot Peoples says he saw some people it "He wanted careless discharge ofa ball League (CFL), will be sentenced in and SlUTOunding his Jeep and yelled weapon, which is only a misde in AIm Arbor on December 2, after the at them to freeze. He then claims he meanor," said Captain Richard conclusion of the CFL season. shot off three rolUlds into the air as a DeGrande of the AAPD. Peoples was originally supposed warning. "'Th.ey asked me to plea bargain, to be sentenced in September, but Those Surl"OlUlding Peoples' Jeep but it was no bargain," said Peoples to was able to delay his sentencing due were actually plainclothes policeman the Saginaw News. "If I was really to a motion filed. by his attorney, Gre who were filling out a report from an guilty I would have taken it But they gory Schmid. Punishment for the arrest they had just previously made. wanted me to plead assault with a Convicted felon Shont. PeopIee former All-American could range from They say that, instead of shooting in gun. I didn't do that. probation to four years in prison, al the air, Peoples shot directly at them. they could see. It was 4:00 AM. and though it is unlikely that Peoples will In an interview with the Saginaw dark, yet they say they saw my arm See PEOPlES, page 8 receive anything harsher than proba News, Peoples responded to the alle- lower with the gun like I was poin~ tion along with community service, due to the fact that he haa no prior arrests. Yet, even if Peoples receives The Ozone Alternative nothing more than probation, he may have more serious troubles ahead. BY MEeHAN RoEKLE from sexual abuse to suicidal tenden viduation and separation, and sup As a convicted felon, Peoples could cies. The quality of the COlUlseling is ports self-determination among teen be precluded. from crossing the border OMMUNITY BASED, impressive, and it is oriented towards agers." This philosophy is what brings into Canada, which would most likely collectively organized, free ser lUlearthing a teen's complete dissolu about concrete changes. Rather than end his career as a player in the CFL. Cvices, service philosophy, this tion with his self and his future, using supplying an endless flow of pity and While the CFL does have many Ameri is not describing the philosophy of the an outcome-based formula. almsgiving, the volunteers attack. the can franchises, the majority are still Maoist International Movement, but Ozone House also has a twenty cause of the youth's anguish and help in Canadian cities, thus making it that ofOrone House, a well organized four hour hotline which teens can call them to colUlter the negative effects impossible for Peoples to play in many service for rlUlaway and homeless to talk about an immediate crisis. The with responsibility and resolution. away games. teens in Ann Arbor. Ozone House is a colUlselors "listen, help clarify, and For runaway teens ages twelve to Peoples' possible dilemma is very crisis center with a challenging atmo offer resources." You may say, "Can't eighteen, a temporary foster care pro similar to the situation faced by funner sphere of self-sufficiency and conflict we just show these kids the Constitu gram is set up as a "cooling otr' period Detroit Red Wing Bob Probert a few resolution. This clean and cheerful tion and all the opportunities avail from any family tension.. Ozone House, years ago. Probert, who was convicted house has created a concise, counsel able to them?" No, not when they do however, encourages communication of transporting cocaine from Wmdsor oriented program from a limited city not care about their future, or believe with the family, and mutual input. to Detroit, was forbidden from freely and state budget, with private dona they can create their own. Thus, unless there is a court order crossing the border, lUltil the Cana tions adding the final touches. Ozone House has a game plan for from the department of social ser dian government, in a joint decision The center is staffed by volun homeless teens and rlUlaways that vices, the youths must have permis with U.S. authorities, reinstated teers, each of whom is required to centers on identifying the source of sion from their families to stay in a Probert's right to enter and leave complete fifty-two hours of training, each teen's personal dilemma. The foster home. With the goal of Canada. with a six month commitment to coun center's flyer proclaims, "AB a youth The actual events surrounding · seling service. The youth confide in advocacy agency, Orone House recog See OZONE, page 8 the incident that resulted in Peoples' these volunteers about everything nizes that growing up involves indi-
Mandatory From Suite Misguided Coffee Shop Book 3 Volunteerism 4 One 5 Diversity 6 Cynicism 11 Review Does required community Compulsory student In its quest for increased A haven for Ann Arbor's A scathing review of Cal service violate the 13th funding for MSA should be minority enrollment, the myriad of vexatious Thomas' The Things That Amendment? abolished. administration does more pseudo-intellectuals. Matter Most. harm than good.
' _"_"~~"""~_' ...... MV .. __ _ .~ ~ ._ ••••"."w_"._._ .. ".. _. _ __~~ _ _ _ ~ ____.... _,... ",_"""_,___ ~,, _... ~~.. _., ...... __ ... ""' ,""''''''===;;;;;;;;.... '"'';;;;= ...... = ..;;;;;;'''''_'''''_''''''=== ~ 2 THE MICInGAN REVIEW October 12, 1994 '.~
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o SERPENT'S TOOTH.· The Campus Affairs Journal of the University of Michigan ·We don1 need no stlnkin' government."
In a speech given recently to media dents to drink fluids, get plenty of illegal sexual activity in University EDITOR-IN-CHIEF: NaIll JImIson professionals, President Clinton said rest, and wear a condom. restrooms. In a related note, sexual PUBLISHER: Eric Lanon that he frequently reads sacred texts encounters between midgets are in CAMPUS AFFAIRS EDITOR: Rachel C.rdone seeking guidance and comfort. We In a related note, UHS is doing it's creasing on campus. MANAGING EDITOR: ...... A. RoM'tI, H FEATURES EDITOR: Greg pm. didn't know the McDana.ld's placemats part for the plague outbreak in India were considered sacred. by, you guessed it, airlifting ten thou The University's function? To force MUSIC EDITOR: Drew Pean sand condoms to the affected areas. liberal concepts down the throats of ASSISTANT EDITORS: Gene Kraa, DellI President Clinton warned Saddam students. The Residential College's Bakopoulol copy EDITORS: CIvIl Bm. IIoIIIn Krlahnan Hussein this week by saying, '1)0 not Talk show guru Geraldo Rivera re function? To do this in a more intimi CtRCULA TION DIRECTOR: Erik Schnuraln cross that border." Evidently Bill cently vowed to help clean up the dating, oops, intimate setting. wants to be first in line at Taco Bell. airwaves by refusing to do "trashy" STAFF: Jonethan Canedo, Chrll Camacchlo, Den topics on his syndicated show. The On September 29, the Daily alerted ChamberlaIn, lin Goldenberg, .IIr'er1\I ~, c.r· Critics of the University's Greek sys next week he featured John Wayne its readers to the fact that a "new" rIe Heitman, Chauncey HItchc:oc:k, MlrCUI Jayt*, BenJan*I Kepple, ChrIs MlcKechnle, DIve NnberTy, tem now believe that the teIm "Greek" Bobbit and the cast of Bobbit's new study says more partners increase W1II Nelson, Amln Panjwanl, RodMn Raha, IIItt should not be used in COI\iunction with porn film. the risk ofSTDs. The Daily also in Rechtlen, IIeghan RoeIde, MItt Savage, MItItIew fraternities and sororities out of re formed its readers that there is no StrIua, Uu WIgnet' spect for true Hellenic culture. Asked Coming Out Day was yesterday. Okay link between no partners and blind back EDITOR EIERITUS: TrlCY RobInson about the fraternity systems connec now, time to go inside, everyone. ness. PUBUSHER EMERITUS: Aarbn StMlmM tion with Greece, an anonymous so rority girl stated, "Well, like, Grea8e On the same episode ofGeraldo, porn All over campus, fraternities, inspired was like a funny movie and all, but, star Tiffany Lords revealed she was byt.he tradition of the groom carrying The AIcII/gNI Re.,." is an independent, bi-weeldy stu like. I really don't see how it relates to pregnant with Bobbit's child. We're the new bride over the threshold, are dert run journal II the UnNersiIy ~ Mchigan. We nelller sold nor accept monetary donalions from Ihe Unlversly us." not even going to touch that one, folks. having their pledges C8.lTY sorority 01 ~, and have no respect lor anyone that does. pledges into their house. This makes ContrIluIionB to the Mchigan Review are tax~bIe Cold and flu season is just around the You may have noticed the bathroom us wonder if they are consummating lI'Ider Seaion 501 (c)(3) ~ the ~ Revenue Code. We corner, and officials at University stalls in Mason Hall are much shorter the relationship in the "traditional" have no respect for the IRS (or any OIher IIegitImBIe depaItmtrt 01 the lederaI governmelt, 00 wal a second, Death, er, Health Services1ll'ge stu- this year as part of an effort to curb way as well. !heY lie allIegIIImaJe) Of lor people who acIUaI'f Ihilk we "''''1. need. gcMIfffIlIrIt. The RlWlilwIt nat aIIIIdId will r i any poMicaI party or \lWersly poMicaI ~oup.
DROVING PHOTOGRAPHER by Usa Wagner UnsIgned ~ represenlthe opI1Ion ~ the edlorial board. Ergo,they .e unequlvocably conect and ~ You neem' ~ to IisprIWe the logic ItIal went lito thei fomlation, for you cannoc Signed articles and cartoons represent the opinions 0I1he aUlhOf and I'd necessart; those ~ the Review. The opiIIons pt'eseRed n this pubI What animal do you resemble most? callen aJ8 ~ necessarIy those ~ the advett&ets Of ~ !he UnNersly 01 Michigan We welcome letters and arkIes and encourage commenIS aboIf the joInlaI.
Please address II ~ Inqliries '>: Putisher, c/o the AfchigMr Review. All advertisilg Inqlirin should be directed 10: Publisher clo the I.fchigMI Review. Edllorlll And Bull ..... omc.: Christopher Wynkowski Eric Feinberg Su.. an. Sophomore, LSA Sophomore, LSA 811 N. UnlvIl'lityAv.'IUI AM Arbor, MI 481ot-12S5 "'A marmoset: because Ren "Bacteria: because I like to and Btimpy talk about them hang on the toilet. '" TIL (313) 862-1101 Fax (313) 83&-2505 ...AI all the time, so they're cool. '" ~OllM,!If 'lilt IIIIcHgIn ~ Inc. AI~ __
Sheila Reynolds Mike Schaefer WED LIKE TO Freshman, LSA Graduate, Engineering REMIND YOU THAT THE "A squirrel: because Fm "A naked mole rat: because UNCENSORED CONTENT chipper.'" Fm going bald. '" OF THIS NEWSPAPER IS rvtADE POSSIBLE BY THE CONSTIIDTION OF THE UNITED STATES. THE CONSTIIDTION The words \!lie live qy
T , k.lrr. m,., ", Jb:Io..It the- l..':.oruutW.:>r. \ '-'1tC' Ccorut'lt.UU<' <1. \Vuh~')M . ~ n.c ~':":'QO T'nt c..:.."l"'>~ "" I...... 8Kcotcrn.\I ,.,[T he: l 'S C.,.. lI. utI./tJo...... It}!~ October 12, 1994 THE MICHIGAN REVIEW 3 o EsSAY Mandatory Volunteerism
BY JONATHAN CANEDO compulsory service of one to another." leftist paternalism embracing the the rights of states, Michael Walzer With over a quarter ofhigh schools in belief that only through government hit upon this point when he stated, , HE FIRST FRIDAY OF the United States now mandating that coercion can individuals become bet "As with individuals, 80 with sover classes this semester I spent their students perform unpaid com terpeople. eign states: there are things that we T in Detroit, worlring part of the munity service as a prerequisite to The USA Today is right to have cannot do to them, even for their own afternoon at a food distribution site graduating, the concerns over invol attacked the programs that Townsend. ostensible good." for Focus: HOPE. A community based untary servitude are extremely real, holds so dear in an editorial earlier It may seem, after reading this organization in Detroit, Focus: HOPE, for one may characterize community this year. They write, "Volunteerism article, that my concern over the IPPS . among other services, provides food service programs as such. is like patriotism: Impose it, and you trip to Focus: HOPE is much ado to thousands of needy people in the Various individuals and groups poison it." about nothing. In that case, the point tri-county area. are C\llTently raising other legal is 'Ihis is a position with which John of the argument against any manda 'Ibis day-trip to perform commu sues in opposition to these programs, Stuart Mill would strongly agree. It is tory community service has been nity service was a ~ part of orien though the constitutional protection Mill who best articulates the argu missed. For no matter how minimal tation for new students in the Insti against involuntary servitude seems ment against coervice volunteerism. or seemingly trivial a demand upon tute of Public Policy Studies UPPS), to be the best grounds for opposition. Over a hundred-thirty years ago he the participants that the trip may which I am. Whatever the individual Foremost among the individuals wrote: "[Man] cannot rightfully be have been, the questions raised. are as merits of Focus: HOPE, or any other and organizations opposed to these compelled to do or forbear because it appropriate to it as they are to the community service organization, this programs is the Institute for Justice. will be better for him to do BO ••• because, programs being forced upon' high trip gave me reason to ponder. The Institute for Justice has sued in in the opinions of others, to do so school students. Though not expressed as such, in several different states through the would be wise or even right... ln the The trip to Focus: HOPE may effect all of the incoming students in federal courts in order to have the part which merely concerns himself, have been only a very minor disre IPPS were forced to go, whether or mandatory programs declared uncon his independence is, of right, abso gard of individual rights, but it still not we cared to do 80. While spending stitutional. lute. Over himself, over his own body was a violation. To acquiesce in small a few hours in community service Scott Bullock, an attorney with and mind, the individual is sover cases like this is to place our stamp of may seem to be either a small incon the Institute, states that, "coerced eign. " approval on the more onerous and venience or a worthwhile experience, volunteering not only destroys the The state, or even good meaning oppressive programs being levied at neither point of view touches upon spirit of freely helping others, but individuals such as Townsend or the high school level. the underlying difficulties with a flagrantly violates the Constitution Mincberg, has no right or grounds to For there are no small erosions of mandatory approach to community 88 well. You simply cannot force people try to force its citizens to be good or to rights; there are only erosions of service. to work for others against their will force them to do good acts. WIj.tiRg'of rights. Ml The difficulties with mandatory and without compensation. " community service are two-fold Fh'st, 'The leftist advocacy group, People r------, there are serious constitutional is for the American Way, however, sup sues at stake. Secondly, compelling ports such mandatory programs. someone to perform community ser Elliot Mincberg, legal director for the vice contradicts the spirit ofaltruism organization, has stated that he would ! We Love Money, which is supposed to motivate indi prefer such programs if they were viduals to give of themselves in the voluntary but still supports the coer I first place. cive nature of the programs, adding, This i~ not to blow my trip to "making it a requirement overcomes Focus: HOPE out of proportion. It the natural inertia ofteen-agers." So Send V.s Some was, after all, only one day that in 'That is the largest argument pro cluded about three hours of actual ponents put forward for the programs. I I wi![ work and a free lunch. Still, the same There seems to be a belief among unaerstantl receive agootl in return for my ~ philosophical and legal questions re leftist educators that teen-e.gers must aetluctibfe contri6ution of$25 or more. fIs an atl'lJocate of main, regardless of whether the com be forced to overcome the material capitalist Ufeals antigreet! in genera!, senti me my proauct, I munity service mandated is a short ism and selfishness which is appar I one-time affair or a more involved ently rampant among teen--agers. As for I tfon't 6efu'lJe in giving anytfiing. long-term commitment a Los Angeles Times article puts it, I It is with ~ong-term mandatory "proponents ... believe that they [man I I commitments that the legal issues datory programs] are necessary to ~ou wif{receive a one-year subscription wliicli indUtks 14 take on their most serious nature. In counter a decline in civic values among I these cases the coercive nature of the many members of the MTV genera 6i-weel([y issues ana tIU 1995Summer Orientation Issue. I community service programs violate tion." the constitutional guarantee against Kathleen Kennedy Townsend, an Pfea.5e sen a my subscription to: involuntary servitude as expressed in outspoken advocate for the state-wide the 18th Amendment. The 18th service requirement adopted by the Amendment, while primarilyabolish state board of education in Maryland, ~~:------ing slavery in the United States, pro believes, "You don't choose to do good hibits involuntary servitude unless unless you learn to do good." She also used as a punishment for a crime. states that "A lot of people who are !Jttfifress: 'The United States Supreme Court forced to do something learn to like has ruled in the past that involuntary it." City: ______State: ____ servitude is any "condition ofenforced Unfortunately for Townsend, Zip: people often do good without first Please make check or money order payable to: Jonathan Canedo u a first-year having been forced to do so. And many graduate student in the Institute of of those people who volunteer freely THE MICHIGAN REVIEW 911 North University Avenue, Suite One, Ann Arbor, MI 48109-1265. Public Policy Studies and cares little are in fact teen-agers. What L for helping others. Townsend represents is a misguided ------_ .. 4 THE MIcmGAN REVIEW October 12, 1994
FROM SUITE o ONE .~'
,.~; Abolish Mandatory MSA Fees" ;1,1''''
s THE RECENT DEBATE OVER ANN ARBOR TENANTS' UNION (AATU) funding illustrates, the Michigan Student Assembly (MSA) is A often at the center of campus politics and controversy. Despite the active role that it tries to play, MSA has oonsistently shown that it ineffedively represents students at the University of Michigan. Furthermore, the mandatory fees that MSA uses to function are themselves illegitimate. For these reasons, the assembly should abolish such fees immediately. Like all collective bodies, MSA achieves its ends through coercive means. Students do not have a choice whether or not they want to support MSA; the assembly forces them do so through mandatory fees. Any student who refuses to comply with this policy receives a hold credit, severely hindering the -=;::z~ student's ability to attend the U-M. The student body does have the right to affect these fees by means of a referendum; individuals ultimately have little say in the matter, however, for they must abide by the whims of the oollective. By refusing to allow individuals to freely choose to not support MSA, the assembly fails to serve not only these particular students - it fails to serve the COMMENTARY general principle of liberty. o To ensure that all students may freely pursue their own interests and self development throughout their years at the U-M, MSA must allow them to Greek Weak decide whether or not the assembly effectively represents them. '!hat is, MSA must recognize the right of the individual student to either contribute or deny HE RECENT ACTIVITIES CONCERNING THE SIGMA PHI funds to the assembly. In order to do so, the assembly must designate the fees . Epsilon fraternity demonstrate the weakness withing the Greek system.. as voluntary, not mandatory. T While it is normal for a person to want to belong to an organization and One may argue that MBA will not be able to function effedively without the fraternize, it is illogical to acquire a group of 'friends' who will in turn degrade current mandatory fees. It is reasonable to expect that a multitude of students you and in some cases cause physical and mental harm. would opt to not support MSA if given the chance. '!his point is irrelevant, While not every house hazes, the Greek system has a history of hazing however, for MSA's record of addressing student concerns over the past several incidents that continue every year, a solid indication that the problem isn't years is dismal '!he U-M administration bas recently shown a great disrespect going fade. During 'hell week', pledges spend nuch time with each other, doing for individual liberties on campus; the assembly, in turn, has responded with things from singing songs and pla~ . trntb or dare (non-hazing practices) to an unwillingness and inability to defend the rights of students. drinking mass quantities of alcohol and doing unhealthy, degrading acts. The most prominent example of MSA's ineptitude in dealing with the '!he Interfraternity Council and Panhellenic Associations denounced the administration concerns the Statement of Student Rights and Responsibilities, recent hazing incident at Sig Ep, and they claim to be educating other Greek otherwise known as the Code. Perhaps the most unfair and oppressive initiative houses about the dangers of such acts. A system in which college students must undertaken by the administration, the Code is an establishment of "laws" be reminded of basic human rights doesn't seem logical. To what standards do governing student behavior, on and off campus. The U-M may try any student Greek participants adhere? that it believes is in violation of an ordinance. The accused, however, do not The most interesting part of the story lies in that Scott Sandler, former possess several of the basic rights guaranteed by the Constitution's Bill of president of Sig Ep, takes the defensive at each mention of the incident; he Rights and legal precedence. '!he Code, for instance, does not grant one the right thinks his house has become a scapegoat for all the ill feelings toward the to have an attorney to speak on one's behalf The entire procedure is private. system. He also denies that his house has a problem. Note that an intoxicated Despite its illegitimacy, the preeentation of the Code gave MBA a momentous pledge fell off the roofin 1992, and this year, a pledge almost died from being opportunity to defend the interests of students. Although it was armed with a forced. to drink. excessive amounts of vodka. student referendum showing wide-spread opposition to the Code, MSA was Again and again, negative stories concerning both fraternities and sororites futile in its efforts to revoke the initiative. Though the assembly discusses this circulate. Yet students continually put up with these negatives to become a part matter periodically, it seems to have accepted its own ineffectiveness and, ofthe system. Each fall the campus oomes alive with girls dressed in their best, unfortunately, conceded defeat. hoping to impress a certain house. During rush, they are judged on their Although MSA is inept when dealing with the administration on behalf of demeanor, jewelry, makeup, and a few words. There are no guarantees, which students, it is able to spend money quite lavishly. Currently, students pay $2.69 Panhel admits. They seem to know that underneath the facade the choice is each semester to support MSA Yet the student body receives little in return for based on superficiality and a guess. Only after a young woman becomes a pledge these fees. For this fiscal year, MSA's internal budget - the costs of running will a house know ifit made the right choice. oopiers, computers, long distance phone service, and the like - is $26,000. Such Although the Sig Eps renounced their charter, they are still living together extravagant spending is of little or no value to students, and is additional as a group of friends, and even though they cannot hold formal rush, they can evi~ence of the assembly's failure to serve. attract new friends by word of mouth. Until then, they will lease the house from MBA does not limit its spending merely on itself It has established a rather the National Chapter, party and function as a group of friends. Ironically, they extensive welfare state on campus as well. As of late, virtually every candidate will be truer to the Greek System ideal than the functioning houses which and party that has run for election to MBA has pledged to increase funding to continue to violate the original reason for having a house in the first place. student groups. '!his has resulted in a budget of nearly $200,000 appropriated One can avoid the problems ofjoining a system where participants commit to such groups on campus. What the assembly fails to realize is that doling out crazy acts to impress a brother or sister and act like sheep, unless one chooses money to student groups does not serve the the student body as a whole; it by refusing the Greek system all together. By choosing one's own friends from simply benefits those recipients who are lucky enough to survive a journey the vast number of people here on campus, one has ~ much better chance of through the assembly's political gauntlet. Student groups on campus should finding true ones: friends who can live together in a house, have parties, do take the responsibility to provide for their own existence - to rely on fellow things like rollerskating or bowling-even dress up and go out to a fancy dinner, students is unjustifiable. MBA's participation in this redistribution of income in a formal fashion. True friends ,do not test each other by making others grovel. is a detriment, not a service, to students. Within the microcosm of the Greek world, the notion of a true friend oomes by, In the wake of the recent AATU controversy, the time has come to but too often comes at a price. The incident with the Sigma Phi Epsilon house reevaluate the role ofMSA on campus. To guarantee the right of the individual only emphasizes this. Anyone who allows themselves to be haze4 not only lacks to freely pursue his own interests, mandatory student fees for MSA should be self esteem, but also the intelligence to know what life is about. In the end, the abolished. Mt letters don't count, the person does. Mt -Rachel Cardone
•• ,. __¥_ ~~ •••"~ ... ",,, ' ''_''"'_'''' ' ·_'__ '''' ", ,, • ., •• ,,.~ ....·,, ... ,,.,,,,,,.,,.,,_-...... ''' .... ''.m ,,...--,.,..,.,...,. ____"_ ~,,-..... _-..,_,..'" .. ,Q 'tP> ...... _~~~mflt~~~ ,.".."""...... _ __.... _ ...._ ....______October 12, 1994 THE MICIDGAN REVIEW 5 o EsSAY U-M's Mi$guided Diversity
BY AMIN P AN.JW ANI Asian American Council and a perspectives, none of which should be this is a flaw in University policy, and Chicano Cultural Center. They financial gains or prestige. It needs to the RAs should be trained." Rahul ULTIC ULTURALIS M, wanted blacks to constitute ten per realize that by the year 2000 in the Patel, LSA freshman commented, "If diversity - how many times cent of the student body by 1975; major cities of the United States, mi the RA is not trained for the students, M have you heard these words thirteen percent by 1976; and a per nority populations (collectively) will it's like saying the university is doing being carelessly thrown around by centage equal to or greater than that out-number the Caucasian popula nothing for minorities." Regardless of students, faculty, and the adminis of the state of Michigan. Interestingly tion. How are people supposed to co- how many RAs actually are oonamted tration? From the very first words in enough, nothing materialized. exist in this type of an environment if about minority issues, evidently, there the acceptance letter to freshman ori Then, in 1987, because of racial they are taught to accept each other are students who have had to suffer entation, the students at the Univer flyers being anonymously placed un for the wrong reasons? If the univer because of some ignorant, apathetic sity of Michigan have been crudely der the doors of students of color and sity continues to concentrate on the individuals who have wrongly been brainwashed into accepting the u racially offensive jokes being told on minority enrollment statistics and appointed to a leadership position. M'sliberal attitudes. WJJX. AM, the campus radio station overlooks the people that represent Welcome to the real world. Successful diversity can never be at the time, BAM was involved with the statistics, then about 4,500 stu Changing focus slightly, what achieved simply by wishing that it another strike. This time, BAM de dents will be graduating each year exactly does diversity entail anyway? would happen. It appears that the manded a permanent and completely will ill-informed attitudes towards All the _tension that exists between university has become so obsessed autonomous yearly budget for the people of color: the students and the administration with the number of minority students Black Student Union (BSU) of Apparently, many students feel is over minority issues. If there is a enrolling at U-M that it has lost con $35,000. They also wanted an endow that the university is not handling problem, what is the solution? Ac cern for the people that actually rep ment of$150,OOO for the 'Ih>tter House this issue well. As stated by Sanjay cording to Jolmson, "How are we push resent the statistics. (a cultural center) and an increase of Seth, an LSA freshman, "'Ihe admin ing towards a solution ifa lot ofpeople What exactly does the U-M have black faculty at U-M. The results of istration is not putting forth the effort don't even know the question?" First to gain from these colored statistics? this strike were not trivial. The bud they should be." This opinion that the and foremost, students need to be According to Malika Bibbs, an get of $35,000 was granted to the school is really not all that concerned educated about people of all cultures. lSAjunior and secretary of the Black BSU, as reported in SANKOFA. seems to be a popular one. "The Beware though! Student Union (BSU), "'Ihe more mi Somehow, it's no surprise that university's obligation is to make ev As Molefi. Asante, chair ofTemple - nority students there are at the U-M, this university requires protests in eryone comfortable. They could be University's Department of African the more money the university gets order to acoomplish something for the doing a better job in regards to mi American Studies was quoted in the. from the government. The minorities betterment ofits own students. norities. Minority services are not well University Record on September 26, . are here for the University's1inancial The University should not be · publicized,"_ Seth added. 1994, as saying "Trying to infuse gains." overly concerned L §' <:ow {4?d' ,s,
. ----.--.-- -.--,~-. -.. "-----... " .... --~ ,,,,-,.--'''---, October 12, 1994 THE MICInGAN REVIEW 7 o EsSAY Wolpe's "S~eetheart Deal"
BY KEvIN CosTELLO results. It is ironic that on that very After winning an election to the U.S. getting paid over $50,000 with ben day, the Michigan Daily ran stories House in the mid 19708, he appointed efits for just that one class!" N FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER on both Wolpe's sweetheart deal and Chester Rogers, a fellow professor at 'Ibis chummy relationship is remi 30th, I attended an event at the fact the University annually raises WMU, as his chief of staff in Wash niscent of similar 'sweetheart deals' I Othe Ypsilanti Ford Plant where tuition at twice the rate ofintlation. ington. have read about, such as the many Howard Wolpa, the Democratic can By the mid 1980s, Rogers that brewed in Little Rock, Arkansas didate for governor, campaigned and was back at Western as the during the 1980s. That candidate, Bill where student protesters were wait head of the political science de Clinton, preached against the "Poli ingforhim. partment. While in Congress, tics of greed." 'Ibis candidate, Howard Students were outraged after Wolpe donated thousands of WoIpe, strikes a similar chord. I fear reading that Howard Wolpe, the "com dollars back to his old employer. the scenario of the Lansing State mon man's candidate," received $486 After deciding not to seek re House being run like the Little Rock an hour for teaching part-time at election in 1992, Wolpe made a State House. western M.id:ligan University and the deal with his old chief of staff to The teachers may love Howard University of Michigan in what the work four hours a week for an Wolpe, but the students may not be 80 Detroit News called a "sweetheart annual salary of $54,700, in embracing. Mt deal." cluding benefits. Wolpe made a Students, already angered by sky sinillar arrangement with U rocketing tuition rates, felt betrayed Mat $50,750 for five hours a that this former congressman was week. RITE THE getting paid more than. the average Says one of Wolpe's stu full time salaries at both WMU and dents at Western, "he was ab U-M. Worse yet, he had scheduled . .sent for two regular classes plus REVI EWI office hours on 'fueadays for "'!he Poli he was not present at the mid- tics of Congress" at both schools dur "Common Man" HowardWoIpeface8 ote8ters. term or final examina~ions. ing the same timel pi' Congressman Wolpe's asSIStant Friday's event took. place during a 'This sweetheart deal had its ori did more work than the congressman sh.i.ft change at the Ypsilanti Ford gins back when Wolpe was a profes- . did himself I was very upset when I Plant After a cozy stay at the United sor at Western Michigan University. found out that Howard Wolpe was Auto Workers building across the '-' ~""~ street, Wolpa entered the plant to extend handshakes to workers as they came on and off shift. With him were what appeared to be a couple of his close aides and UAW members. Also with Wolpe were several disgruntled U-M students with signs, protesting. Wolpa's entourage, roughly equal to that of the students and obviously angered by their presence, began to name-call and insult them. 'Ihey were Feel like you have a mad money-munching mon referred to as communists and "spoiled ster in your pocket? Is cash flow just a term used children, .. never to get ":real jobs." One of the men, in a display of his grand in your economics class? Why not spend your free literacy. called me a "dick head." As time into increasing your cash flow? Wolpe looked on, I told the man that name-calling only hurt Wolpe's can didacy. 'lliat seemed to quiet him. As one of the students passed out copies of the Detroit News article to the Ford employees, one of the men with Wolpe actually lunged out to bite the student's ann! 'Ihis radical be havior oontinued until the police ar rived and the students left in good spirits. The people present obviously had Starting wage will be based on experience and availability. Inexpe no idea about the story in the News, judging from their reaction to the rienced persons will be considered for paid training. At Sveden signs that read "Wolpe Cheats Stu House your meals are FREE and scheduling is flexible enough to dents" and "At $486 an Hour, Wolpe be worked around most class and study time requirements. is no Common Man. .. The students are justified in be APPLY ANY TIME OR CALL TERRY TODAY FOR ing outraged. They see their tuition YOUR INTERVIEW. oontinually rising and do not see the Phone (313) 741-1135 Kevin Costello is a .nior in politWal science and a staff writer for the 2771 Oak Valley Drive, Ann Arbor Review.
______'____ """'M~_ ~ ...... _ _.. '~~"' ~ '~"' ~", ,,,,_,,,,,,___ ,,,,,v, ,~,,",,,,,__ ,.,~_ ,. ,~~.,, ~,,, ...... ",,'_ "' ...... '... '~~4 ___'....,,"'_ ... 6 THE MICIDGAN REVIEW October 12, 1994 o EsSAY Coffee Shops ,Brew Non-Intellect
BY GREG PARKER the mixing of people and ideas make tend to appear as they do; they simply because they sound "cool." But even a coffee shop a unique experience, a think that they really are intellectu though Beavis and Butthead say OFFEE SHOPS ARE OFTEN contemporary version of an 18th cen als. While casually sipping on a latta, "nachos rule" while pseudo-intellec a miaocosm of a city. 'This holds tury New England town hall. a pseudo-intellectual will redefine tuals say "socialism rules," their re Ctrue here in Ann Arbor, where Good conversation is the essence Einstein's relativity, his partner, in sults are empirically the same. any coffee shop contains a cross sec of a coffee shop. But good conversa turn, will resolve the mind-body prob- Pseudo-intellectuals travel to cof tion of what the city has to offer: tion becomes fee shops via a late seventies Volvo students, residents and workers. Ev bad when a diesel station wagon with "Love Your eryone goes to coffee shops to talk group of coffee Mother" and "Think Globally, Act abouteve~g. Philosophy, poli shop regulars Locally" and "Visualize World Peace" tics, Melrose Place, O.J. Simpson: cof enter the pic stickers on the bumper. Never mind fee talk knows no bounds. A flannel ture. In fact, that these eco-warnors drive cars clad fraternity-dude and his clones coffee s~ops rt~E:! ... _.... u (Jl~\\\. . l that spew out emissions equal to those will rave about the latest grunge al are sometimes ~_-="~ . #?'!,&:! of the average school bus. Afterparal bum while silent, scholarly old men known for leI parking the Volvo and dutifully focus intensely on a chess . game. these bringers paying the meter, the pseudo Sounds of jazz or classical music pipe of "bad" con intellectual's attire becomes appar through the place, and a live band v ersation. ent. Khaki pants and a t-shirt are might perform a few numbers while These people proper summer dress, and for the patrons casually go about their busi discuss politics winter season the pseudo-intellectu ness. The olfactory auras of smoke, and philosophy als don a turtleneck (black and extra coffee and fresh pastries distinct to a in ways that tight, please) while the khakis re coffee shop can only be broken up would make main. Other notable pseudo-fashion occasionally by certain unbathed cus Descartes statements include berets and goat tomers' stenches. The atmosphere of turnover in his ees, for that Euro-trash look. It is no a coffee shop cannot be duplicated; grave; these PIace8 Uke this have "pseudo-Intellectuar written .., (Nfl it coincidence that pseudo-intellectuals people are wear the same outfit day after day, Greg Parker wean RaM turtlenec1t8, what hereby will be called "pseudo lem while munching on a cranberry- and for that matter, smell as well; and th.inlta that $240 worth. ofpud intellectuals. " orange muffin. Nevermind that pro- they rarely wash their clothes or bathe ding is a kJtofpuddin '. Pseudo-intellectuals do not in- fessionals devote their whole lives to ~ ·~*'because hell, why waste time. better these problems - or that some ofilie spent thinking by washing something greatest minds in history have fo- that is just gonna get dirty again. cused on these enigmas; the pseudo- The spendthrift attitude the intellectuals have all problems solved. pseudo-intellectual exhibits through Just ask them. his dress and actions is a "holier than Pseudo-intellectuals exist solely thou" sire that seems to say, "I frown to hear themselves talk; they flock to on materialism of all sorts." What coffee shops because they know there results is a nonconformist trying so will be other pseudo-intellectuals hard to be anti-materialistic and anti- there with whom they may chat '!hey trendy that he actually becomes a ~BACKRQOM also seem to talk at a louder level than conformist. Hence, all pseudo-4ntel- ~ ¥ $ • A .: a. ( ; ...... 'T'O>' most conversations - this is a result lectuals look the same. of the pseudo-intellectual's craving Ann Arbor has the highest per for recognition. Pseudo-intellectuals capita rate of pseudo-intellectualism ------I ------,1/3 lb. Handpacked I Large 16" are easy to identify because of their in the world. This may be because of I Burger I vernacular, which consists of turning the university or possibly the water; simple concepts into the most compli- no one knows for sure. But it more Cheese Pizza I ill/~/1 d/ll/C!' Or~l~lIl) 01 I I ~ll/tI" Iltlll~l' ~altld cated, lo~winded, redundant and than likely is related to the high per- 1'1l\.. -UP pr D,·II\,,·I\'( )Ill\, $550 1 1'ld. lIf' ,'r Pd"'"ry (lnl\' $4 50 nonsensical linguistics possible. An centage of college educated people in bpm·... IIl -.11-"-I .LE'I'Jr"" 1(1 I] U·I ~ example: "The birth rate in China has the city - and we all know that a risen," would translate in pseudo- college education equals instant ------Chicken I ------Double speak to: "Due to the underlying neo- knowledge. domestication dichotomy of the femi- '!he general idea here is to expose Sandwich : Lun~~ Special. I nist circles, the defiance of contracep- th,e pseudo-intellectual; easy recog- III l': S,lff Ill/III, <;, 11,'1/,,'/11,1.1,' I 2 large 16 Cheese Pizzas I tion, and the post-Anglo imperialism nition will allow one to steer clear of I :,11,1,/;\1 I I II .lIll h' ~ 1'111 <'111\ I in post-Maoist Asia, an inclination in this ultimately annoying species. A I'I(\.. -Up "r [)"l1wry t llll\' $450 1 1'ld.. 111' ,'1 lkh\"'r\ ~ '111\· $995 child birth has happened." You, too, good rule of thumb is to sidestep any E,p"·,.... 1Il·1] '4 E'I"r,·.. III \ ] (1-1 can learn to talk this way. Just pick coffee shop with Volvos parked in ------+------~ out random words out of the dictio- front; another good idea is to avoid 16" Texas Pizza I BACKPACK LUNCH nary, pair them together in a string individuals that use more than four I (~'OIIl/d Hee,: ( )/11011, I 111/.1/1 )c/I ~t1l1di(I/d" d'OICl' 01 ~,IIlJl I and read the result. 'This is reminis- or five syllables regularly. If you do nil III 11111 [ll'PI'I';, 10"'"/0 L:'" I ll/ ~lIIlIlIl,tJlI~t' :;Ollld, li(~/ 1 ('lilt cent of an experiment where a mon- spot a pseudo-intellectual, and even (/1t'dd,1I d/,',v I c" Il' lC ~lltt I), IIIk key was given a typewriter and typed worse, unknowingly strike up conver- 1'1(\.. -1I 1' ,'r [\'I!\,vrv ('Ill" $850 1 1'1,1-. "I' ,'r [),·II\',·r\, ('111\· $525 random letters; eventually, a line of sation with one, just grin and bear it. I r'I'lr' .... I(1 11 '1.\ 1 1'1'11".,)11 \) ,,\ .J ------_ ... ------Shakespeare was constructed, and the After a few hours, the pseudo-4ntel- monkey was hailed a genius. lectual will even bore himself They 605 Church St, Ann Arbor • 741-8296 Furthermore, pseudo-4ntellectu- usually have the common courtesy to als' conversations resemble those of wake you up before they leave, how- Beavis and Buttbead. Both say things ever. m 8 THE MICHIGAN REVIEW October 12, 1994
Peoples .,t!. ~~'''~''!~ .~ rl 'i~Q, zon'" e. t W~i; !l ~:i;;~i; WW:: : ;;U: :i:;: Tlmji!~';~
As the world inches closer dance for future generations. Crit This translates into 133 million available allover the globe to the dawn of a new millen ics, on the other hand, charge the metric tons in the U.S. alone - an that can keep atomic plants in nium, increased attention is notion is nothing but a sugar amount that not only meets the business for a good long time. being focused on the challenge coated Green elixir that exagger stringent requirements of the As a result, most experts rea of how to meet the essential ates environmental distress and Clinton Administration's Climate sonably believe nuclear energy needs of a growing global popu would basically leave the people of Change Action Plan, but also takes can safely supply humanity lation without causing harm industrialized and developing na as much C02 out of the air as all of with ample amounts of energy to the natural ecosystem. A tions alike with little more than America's trees and plants com for thousands of years to come. new catch phrase known as spears and loincloths. bined! Whether or not "sustain "sustainable development" has Regardless of this dichotomy, Nuclear power has also proven able development," as it is be emerged to describe this goal, two things are painfully clear: to be a positive solution to the ing defined and implemented and however ambiguous, it has First, it is impossible to talk about alleged "nightmare" of acid rain. by United Nations bureau been central to the discussion true development without talking U.S. sulphur dioxide and nitrogen crats and environmental policy everywhere from the 1992 Rio about the lifeblood of modern soci oxide emissions have been slashed wonks, is the best course for Earth Summit to the more re ety - energy: and second, if one is by 4,7 million and 2.2 million tons humanity is certainly debat cent U. N. Conference on Popu interested in rmding a truly reli respectively, and thanks to the able. But nuclear power, with lation and DeVelopment held able energy source that is both atom's good work, account for a its ability to sustain real in in Cairo. abundant and environmentally huge chunk of the reductions dustrial and economic growth Support for "sustainable friendly, nuclear power is the ob needed to meet the goals of the while at the same time being development" has principally vious choice. 1990 Clean Air Act. Worldwide, classified as a "friend of the come from the camp of anti Of all the major energy sources atomic energy use has chopped earth," certainly deserves to growth, liberal environmental presently in use, nuclear power is levels of nitrogen oxide by a hefty be embraced by those on both ists who believe our current among the m ost, dare we say, 7 million tons and sulphur dioxide sides of the debate. patterns of industry and con "Green." Take the threat of global by a staggering 14 million tons. sumption are "unsustainable." warming, for example. The use of And as for future availability, They say we must use only nuclear power has reduced world nuclear power is king. It is widely "renewable" resources that do carbon dioxide emissions by about known that nuclear energy relies not pollute and will be in abun- 440 million metric tons annually. on uranium, a natural resource Paid Advertisement
""",,,,., .•._,.-- ,,. W" '.'+ '"' . _ "_"_"~'~"""""" ·" ><~ _ __.· ~ , ,,,_ . ,, .. _ _ ·_·_ ~· __ ·,,¥,_,· _ __...... ~,,, _v~ __.~ ,,,, ~_. ___ -'<_w>_ ,------...""' ... "" """''<' ~,_ _ _ ,_ ''''' ..... ____~ y 4 > October 12, 1994 THE MICHIGAN REVIEW 9 DSCIENCE Take a Ride on the Superhighway BY MOHAN KRISHNAN When your transcript information is mercial service was sued recently, on a system similar·to cable televi- accessible via computer, what would because a user posted a message that sion, whereby users pay certain base EOPLE PASS YOU IN THE happen if someone borrowed your another company found slanderous. charges monthly as well as additional halls muttering about web password? Should e-mail be viewed similarly to charges for premium services, as used. P seroers and spewing long se- What limitations does the system other forms of communication, such Additionally, cable companies are ries of numbers and mismatched syl- have? The answer may surprise you. as memos, and be considered legally researching ways j.o use their exist- lables that seem to have some hidden The Internet is not like your high admissible, or should it be viewed as ing connections to provide services, meaning. You wonder in awe at the school, and no one is aromui to babysit a private form of communication? which would be faster and avoid us- strange puzzles ResComp has posted you. Although private services are E-mail should be admissible as ing telephones. in your dorm. Your friends get their protected by passwords and other sys- evidence in the judicial process, just As infonnational services continue research done with their computers tems that verify users' identity, any- as most other forms of communica- to expand, the rules will continue to while you spend hours in the UGLi. It one can say anything they like on the tion are. This will not effect anyone in change: look at how cable has changed hits you when your professors give public forums, almost censorship-free. a negative manner unless they are in the past ten years. A few years ago, you electronic mail (e-mail) addresses In fact, many of these groups are engaged in criminal activities. This is buying a television and VCR was a instead of phone numbers; informa- devoted to things thought of as taboo another step in making it an accepted complicated process, if you wanted to tion technology is changing rapidly by popular culture. Reprimands are form of communication. There is re- watch cable. In those days, there used and has a profound eftect on om- lives. issued in extreme cases, like last ally nothing special about it that sepa- to be advertisements on network. tele- These new services offer conve- year, when a student sent a list of rates it from memos, faxes, or letters. visions wanting against the danger of nience, require less time and effort, racist jokes across the country, but in Another question that will steer a future "without broadcast televi- and allow access to information in general, ideas are not controlled. the growth of information technology sion." Yet PBS is surviving the on- new ways. And although Al Gore It is easy to see that there is no is this: although these services are slaught ofMTV now as well as ever. waves cute graphics and sound bites other option. Many of these services widespread at universities and in As regulations are defined and ser- about the future of the "information are managed by ordinary people who businesses, how will they reach the vices are increased, the Internet and superhighway," it is already here. saw the need for them and filled it As home market? Many entrepreneurs all ofth.e other buzzwords ofinforma- This "revolution" began years ago it is, many services are automated by have entered this field, offering com- tional technology will cease to be im- when the government laid the foun- computers and need minimal human petitive and successful products that portant and simply will be an ac- dation for the Internet This frame- interaction. Ifthese services were to can be installed on home computers. cepted part of life. Soon yom- home or work allowed universities, colleges, be carefully watched for unethical or In fact, many new computers come office will not be complete without a businesses, governmental agencies, questionable behavior, they would with products which operate over tele- networked computer, a fax machine, and other organizations to communi- require constant human supervision. phone lines. They typically operf;lte -·-and other electronic goodies. Ml cate through computers. The people who operate them are not The Internet took a long time to paid for this; the services would develop, and only the :recent market- quickly die. ing of computers for the general popu- In order to preserve these services, lation has made it viable for us. Per- the duty of watchguard lies upon its '5 6OOK5TORE haps this is a good thing, though, users. Even more than in other sys- 549 E. Unlv~n;~ 313 ..662 .. 3201 because this lag allowed for the sys- tems, the operators of these comput- tem to work more reliably. erized information sources rely upon SERVING ANN ARBOR Among other things, students can the input of their clients to maintain communicate with students at other and improve their operation. Surpris- 51NCE19M schools through Computers. They can ingly, this works very well. This sense converse in open forums about a di- of obligation causes Internet users to verse group of topics, from scuba div- be very protective, and new users ing to politics to audio equipment. should not be surprised to be cor- Information technology allows rected often when they make mis- more people to work. from their homes takes. ThO\lgh these corrections are and coordinate research data with far not always kind, and are sometimes away branches of their study. It al- not even helpful, they are typically lows consumers and manufacturers suggested with the best intentions. to interact on a quick and convenient Is this method of protection suffi- basis, leading to higher customer sat- cient? Although dangerous informa- isfaction and manufacturer produc- tion is often passed through comput- tivity. It allows students and their ers, it is also available in printed professors to communicate more eas- form. Many people, however, believe ily outside of class. that the regulations placed on elec- Is it entirely good that information tronically distributed infonnation is is so freely available? A rebellious not satisfactory. teenager could easily use the Internet A bill raised in congress last year to learn how to make bombs, break sought to allow the government to into long-distance telephone accounts eavesdrop on e-mail and other mes- or vandalize business computer sys- sages, in an effort to curb crime over tems. 'This dangerous knowledge, the Internet Although opposition to USED 5OOKS. NEW 5OOKS. MICH r .. SHIRTS. among other things, is available on this was overwhelming from actual ART SUPPlIES, TO'NELS, HATS & CAPS. the Internet too. users, their main point was one of SCHOOL SUPPLIES, BACK PACKS, POSTERS, Alternatively, private information principle. There are too many users of about you such as your home address e-mail, and government observation SHORTS, ACADEMIC SOFlWARE, M 5'NEATSHIRTS and phone number are freely avail- would not affect most of them. MICHIGAN ITEMS, AND MUCH MO~ I able to anyone at U-M, how can we At the heart of this issue is the know that it isbeintn>U't1.6lt66d u.ee? . . legal irtatus of e-mail On:e' major rom~ . ~ (. " . ~ t , ~ .. ;. , .; c'," ,'; J'
___'._ ,_ _ ~.~"n __•__ ' ____' __·' _ ____ • 10 THE MICHIGAN REVIEW October 12, 1994 o BOOK REVIEW Catch This Book
BY Ib:N.IAMIN KEPPLE Closing Time is a very good read, While Hellerintroduresnew char- the upper classes in New York City, however. Heller writes with the same acters in Closing Time, the old char- helping to supervise and plan a soci- ANS OF JOSEPH HELLER'S sarcastic flair as he did in Catch-22, acters that managed to survive World ety wedding, held in the Port Author- classic novel Catch-22 will but he fails to reach the the absurdity War II are back 50 years later. Milo ity BUB Terminal. Anyone who has F handily recognize Yossarian's that is present in the original. In- Minderbinder and ex-PFC Winter- been to the Port Authority will real- situation at the beginning of the se stead, Closing Time starts with a nar- green have merged to form a large ize just how odd this sounds (and if quel to Catch-22, eto.i11l1 Time. He is rative by Sammy Singer, the man you haven't been in the hospital with symptoms that now identified as the fainting #Agents are still interrogating there, don't go), but the doctol"8 cannot identify. In the 50 tailgunner during Catch-22's scene. it offers the upper years since Catch-22, Yossarian has with Snowden and Yossarian at poor ChaplaIn Tappmann, tor- crust of society a not changed. that much. ~vignon . But the ~ from the start, menting him by placing him un- chan~e ~ hold a 18 not so much COllllC, but melancholy. wedding m a new and somewhat resigned. '!he tone is der the hIm the hot lamps, when location. It also al- Closing Time also nostalgic, as many of the charac- th d' h·' t· lows Heller to sati- Joseph Heller ters yearn for the "good old days." ey lscover e IS unna lng rize the excesses of Simon & Schuster Sammy begins his Il8lTlltive by look- heavy water. and may cause ra- the rich with the ing through old photographs from his • • ' • • " . miserable condi- Hardcover, 1994, 464 pgs. childhood, and the war:, other new dtoachve contamlnahon. tiona of the ultra $24.00 characters introduced throughout the poor. HeUer uses the novel are also nostalgic, and begin military-industrial conglomerate that Port Authority setting to display some While CloWw TUne features mum their stories by discussing the past. sells evetything from Egyptian cotton of the travesties of our modem day oftb.e same stylistic tones that Heller In its entirety, Closing Time sati- to the "M&M E&A Sub-Supersonic society by forcing his characters to embodied in Catch-22, the sequel does rizes not war, but the relative absur- Invisible and Noiseless Defensive interact with the '):loor and downtrod- not compare well to the original. dities of peace, such as urban blight, Second-Strike Offensive Attack den." These upperclass characters the conditions of the poor, and the Bomber," aka the "Shhhhh." '!he at- have a disgust, mixed with curious Ben Kepple i8 an LSA fre8hman who government's pervasive inefficiency. tempted promotion of the aircraft to fascination, with the poor who spend apend& nuNJt of hUt ~ worrying about Heller also satirizes the bleak leader- the military leads to some of the fun- their days in the Port Authority. thing_ tIW moBt people ruually don't, ship that arises in government from niest dialogue of the book, satirizing Some of the humor in Closing liM GATr and worldwide currency political maneuvering, and how this the inefficiency and non~eadership Time is almost identical in fann to the rotN. may have grave conseqUeIu:es for all. in the military and the civilian gg.y,..- humorousleape that appear in Catch- .i------,;..-----. ernment Meanwhile, agents are still 22, but the overall tone of the novel ruthlessly interrogating the poor reflects an atmosphere of remem- Life is too short to Chaplain Tappmann, tonnenting him brance and nostalgia; to be blunt, the drink cheap beer! by placing him under the hot lamps, book is not as funny as Catch-22. when they discover that he is urinat- Perhaps it wam't meant to be. Clos- ing heavy water, and may possibly ing Time delivers a message as well cause radioactive contamination. as Catch-22 did, that the conditions We have added to our already extensive Heller also brings back some of the in which we live during peacetime are beer selection many new mico-brewed dead spirits of people killed in the no better than those during war. '!his beers for your sampling pleasure. war, such as Kid Sampson and message cannot be looked upon as McWatt, who are headed for another humorous in this day and age. Inter- bombing run in another plane. estingIy, Closing Time looks not at 1hroughout the novel, Yossarian, the front lines of World War II, 50 who works as a "semi-retired semi- years in the past; rather, it skewers consultant" for Milo Minderi>inder and the Home Front that exists in our ex- PFC Wintergreen, interacts with modem society. 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BY AARON STEELMAN Roberta Achtenberg, to a position at the United States, if Thomas could ologist to see the connection between HUD, and celebrating "gay pride" have his way, would be victimized by 'music' like this and the permission it EVIEWING AYN RAND'S events. Two of the remaining criti his holy crusade against civilliber gives some people who are predis Atlaa Shrugged, Whittaker cisms have to do with Clinton's posi ties. In perhaps the most vile chapter posed to such behavior to try it out on R Chambers remarked that, "Its tion on abortion. Thomas makes it of the book, The Promise of a woman they know (or one they don't shrillness is without reprieve. Its dog clear that he opposes Bill Clinton for Unrestrained Expression, Thomas know)." matism is without appeal. [F]rom al cultural reasons; it is not the fact that launches an all-out assault against With this statement, Thomas has most any page, a voice can be heard, Clinton is willing to increaseihe size the First Amendment, putting him exposed himself for what he and all from painful necessity, commanding: of the State to fit his agenda that squarely in the corner of Catharine other religious rightists are: comrades "To a gas chamber - got" The same upsets Thomas, it is that Clinton will MacKinnon and Andrea Dworkin. in arms with the left, unbeknownst to not do so to fulfill Thomas' agenda. Thomas' primary reason for cen either group. Thomas then divides the book into sorship is that people are like lem Thomas calls for censorship be The Things That Matter Most six. chapters, each of which contain mings and will, sometimes unwit cause he believes that people are fun Cal Thomas several short essays on subjects as tingly, believe anything they hear; damentally incapable of determining Harper Collins diverse as: why homosexuals are bad thus they cannot be exposed to ideas what to believe and what not to be Hardcover, 1994, 219 pgs. to why homosexuals should be perse which may be unpleasant or vulgar. lieve, and thus are incapable ofmak cuted, from why those who do not And, apparently, Thomas believes ing rational decisions for themselves. $22.00 believe in God will bum. in Hell to why He believes that there non-believers are destined to live a must be someone to watch could be said of Cal Thomas' latest miserable existence during their tUne over people so that they book, The Thing8 That Matter Moat, on earth. Perhaps 'TholW,lS thinks such won't fall into the devil's except from almoetany page one can issues are the most importantprob tra p and listen to rap envision an empassioned Thomas lems facing America today, or per music, and then go out screaming, "To Hell you will gol" haps he just doesn't think about other and rape and pillage. And, Thomas, a nationally syndicated issues. Whatever the reason, the re ultimately, he ac:b:irlts that columnist and CNBC talk show host, sult is the same: The Things That this standard-bearer, this has, in The Thing8 That Matter Moat, Matter Most is at the same time in protector from all things written a book almost totally devoid furiating and boring. 'Thomas simply evil, will have to ·be the ofment Its one redeeming quality is beats his pet issues to death. State. its brevity; 'Ihomas has kept his sense On homosexuality, the issue about III this mentality any le88 rambling down to 219 page8. In which he seems most paranoid, Tho differen:t than that held fact, the book would be completely mas states, "'lbe good news for homo by the modern left, who unworthy of review except for one sexuals, even gays, who want to created a program such as important fact: it epitomize8 every change is that they can. But one must social security because thing that is wrong with the "Reli first have the desire. [1] have a num they believed people would gious Right." ber of friends who were once part of be too ignorant to plan for 'Thomas opens the book with an the gay lifestyle. Many are now re their own retirements and explanatory essay. Its purpose is to married to people of the opposite gen thus must be forced to pay give the reader a brief synopsis of der and enjoying a new life. They are into a governmentally run 'Thomas' ideas and to set the tone for the best 'scientific' evidence that plan? Is this mentality any the rest of the book. It does a fine job people who can change ... shouldn't different than the ane that at bothi one will not wander into the be recognized as part of a wider and waS behind the creation of rest of the book expecting anything redefined family." the various attempts at a other than hastily reasoned, reaction It is this type of statement that speech code here at the aryideas. makes the militant left so upset. And Cal Thomas: Statist Authoritarian University of Michigan? In this brief introductory essay of so it should. But, almost without ex that the majority of this vulgarity 'The answer is no. Thomas' view of 14 pages, Thomas manages to de ception, those on the left who are emanates from modern music, for he man is fundamentally the same as nounce individualism, promote un appalled by such a statement are dis attacks 2 Live Crew, Guns N Roses, the left's. Ifhe could, he would per questioning obedience to authority, gusted for the wrong reasons. They and Pink Floyd as being purveyors of petuate policies as paternalistic and and damn all those who do not share say that homosexuality is a function immorality, all within a few pages. a uthoritarian as the ones that have his "faith." It really is quite a feat. of one's biological make-up and that His attack on 2 Live Crew is pre already been established by the left· In addition to the aforementioned anybody who dares to question this dictable, as every moral majoritarian and are Wldoubtedly being brewed up subjects, Thomas sets his aim on at premise is a bigot and a homophobe, has, at ane time or another, pointed to in the White House right now. tacking Bill Clinton, an easy target if instead of simply responding that it is their lyrics as being symbolic of While libertarians and thought there ever was one. Yet, he manages nobody's business what people ofvary America's moral decay. Yet, Thomas ful conservatives share similar views to screw even this up. ing sexual preferences do in private. goes one step further in his attack of on many issues and should work to Thomas makes seven criticisms By trying to make the biological argu 2 Live Crew. He, much like gether in reducing the size and scope of Clinton, and unbelievably only one ment, homosexual activists have side MacKinnon, suggests that there is a of government, classical liberals of them has to do with Clinton's insa stepped the broader and more funda causal link between listening to sexu should be as wary of religious right tiable desire to ina.-ease the size of the mental issue of how consensual, vic ally explicit music and one's propen ists, such as Thomas, as they have federal government. Three of Tho timless acts should be viewed in a free sity for committing violent sexual at been of the left. Although it may ap mas' complaints deal with Clinton's society, and in so doing have played tacks. Thomas states, "Anyone who pear as if libertarians and the reli policies towards homosexuals: at directly into the hands of seriously believes that people can gious right share common ground, as tempting to allow gays in the mili authoritarians like 'Thomas. - regularly listen to swill like this and their paths sometimes cross on an tary, appointing an open lesbian, Homosexuals should not feel privi not be affected by it - indeed, that a issue, such as home schooling, classi leged, however, for they are only one few already warped minds would not cal liberals must remember that the Aaron Steelman u ajunior in of many groups upon whom 'Th.omas be prompted to act out the sugges gospel of the religious right is economic8 and publi8her would like to impose his twisted mo tions contained in it - must be de grounded in authoritarianism and emeritus oftlu! Review: rality. Indeed, every single citizen of luded. [O]ne doesn't need to be a sOci- hostility to individual liberty. Ml 12 THE MIClllGAN REVIEW October 12, 1994 o MUSIC Not Your AYerage Reverend BY DREW PETERS AI was the first real producer we've full-on beer drinking guy, I had my ried in February and we all flew out to ever had. He didn't really tell us what fill of hard liquor in high school and Vegas because he was getting mar HE REVEREND HORTON to do, we did our songs and then he college." ried at the graceland chapel out there. Heat continues to rip out the took it and mixed it down. We still Taz went on to further destroy my We all had a great time, my wife and T wildest and finest 50s were real close though, and we had a all-out worship of their manly South- I, Jimbo and his fiancee, Jim and his rockabilly with their InterscopeiSub great time. I guess we're girl.fi:iend. We did a lot of gambling. I Pop release Liquor in the Front (keep pretty satisfied with the way think I came out just about even." on saying it, you'll get it). it sounds, but I personally Hell! The Reverend isn't a real Featuring .flDl "Reverend Horton" would like to try the next one Jesus-preaching, girl~eflowering Heat on gui- ,...... ------...., ourselves. We wanted AI to reverend! tars and vo- Reverend really fuck it up, we wanted "The religious thing is just for cab, Jimbo Horton Heat him to go over the edge, put fim. We all have our own beliefs but it Wallaoo on the Uquor in the Front hard-core sounds on there, doesn't have anything to do with the upright bass, Sub Pop/lnterscope like Ministry. In the end it band. Somebody called Jim "Rever and Patrick~------_~ just turned out too pretty, too end" and it just stuck. He's not really "Taz" Bentley on the drums, the trio tinny and too disgustingly happy with it, cause everyone goes started out in 1987 as a pure rockabilly heavy. So we had Thom over the edge with the whole "preach band, doing originals and covers. Af Panunzio remix most ofit, to ing" and "converting" thing at our live ter signing with Sub Pop in 1990, they get rid of the sounds that shows. We're really fearful of being released Smolee 'Em If You Got 'Em weren't really wanted. Pro;;; thought of as a novelty act; we're not and The FulJ--Custom Gospel. Sounds duction-wise it could have at all. We are guys that write music Of The Reverend Horton Heat. De been a lot better." and try to rock. We don't get up on acribed by Taz as "harder and faster" Nonetheless, the songs stage and try to be hammy. We just than the other albums, the Rev has prevail. The Rev's proclama are hammy." whipped up some more rowdy rock. tion that "young girls and gin If you bought a used car from these guys, you're stupid - -Well,.rock they do! Don't miss The and roll ri1fB on Liquor, complete with may be the cure" sums up Reverend lIorton Heat with Tender tales of sin, aex. and substance abuse. most of the lyrical content for the ern tastes. loin and Southern Culture on the But don't think that this album is songs on Liquor, however Taz adds "AB for gambling," explains Taz, Skids on 'fuesday, October 18th at St. redundant; the gang shows their that "his lyrics are fun but his story "we'll do it when it's there, but it is Andrews in Detroit. You have been Latin. surl', country, and - believe it telling his more important He teFs a almost never there. Jimbo got mar- '" studying too much lately. Go. m or not - Ministry influence on Li good story. We don't bnng politics quor. The latter comes partly from into our lyrics for the most part, if we Ministry frontman and renowned do iill be really overboard, really out country fan AI Jourgensen's produc rageous. Then there are more pensive Essential'Tenors;b] tion on the album. Predictably, 'l1le songs like 'In Your Wildest Dreams.' r·!~.- ~ Reverend Hortxm Heat and AI had an No matter what, I really trust and unusual start. enjoy his writing a lot." "He was watching us at one of our The Rev's support of the finer Our Time shows in Chicago," relates Taz ...After things in life (women,liquor and gam- the show, someone stopped me in the bling paraphenelia splatter the pack- I BY P1NxY Tu8cEDINO album even more interesting becaUBe hall, knelt down and kissed my feet. I aging) can bring out the rowdy redneck this group embodie8 the future of didn't know who it was and I was like, in almost anyone, yet the band seems Oy HARGROVE, A YOUNG jazz. It is worthwhile to note, how 'Dude, get up, let's have a beer.' It to live alternate lifestyles. trumpet and fluegelhom ever. that even with the youth of this wasn't until later that we found out it "I pretty much. hang out after our R player out of Dallas, Texa8, group, traditional styles ofjazz com was AI Jourgensen. We were kind of shows," relates Taz. '1 stay on the bus had a reputation in high school - a prise this album; the contemporary tossing around the ideas for our third or in the hotel rooms. I'm actually reputation ofbeing tmrted as the "'real jazz fusion style wu not considered.
album at the time and since Gibby pretty shy, I tend to hide more than thin~ by vet- r-,------, "Subtle" best describes With the Haynes (from Butthole Surfers) pro anything else. It's just that when you eranjazz play Roy Hargrove Tenon ofOur 7'ime. While certainly duced our second album we thought are on the road so long you tend to feel ers throughout Quintet not bland, the album. iB very ... mel that it would be cool to oo-produce it boxed in, even though we adore our the region. With the Tt7Wrs of low. The BOngs are impeccably pro between the thr6e of us; the band, fans. We still love doing what we do." Hargrove lived Our 1inu duced. and Hargrove's selections ac Gibby and AI. In the end AI ended up On the other hand '" '1 would like up to thesel Verve cent the styles of bi8 quintet 8.8 well doing it." to have more tattoos. fve only got four prophecies; bis 1....______....J aB the five guest players. With the The resulting work ended in semi or five. For the longest time I've latest album is a sparkling concoction Tenors ofOuT' Time is not eomething industrial sounds that were fitting wanted an American eagle on my back, ofjazz styles. that the group simply sat down and for the thrashier tunes but not suited with a banner that says "mother" on it With the Teno,.. of Our Time fea recorded; much rehearsal and a fine for a large portion of the Rev's work. or something. Something outra turet Hargrove'. quintet plu8 five attention to detail were an integral "We thought that would be great, geously big. " gueatmusicianB, tenor aaxophonista part of the album'8 production. sinoo we like living on the edge and Taz finds it hard to understand who define the j8Z1l ofour time: Johnny '!he future of jazz i8 safe with tasting our boundariee. We don't want the interest in the Liquor In The Front Griffin, Joe Henderson, Stanley Hargrove and his band. While his to be predictable. The first album was (Poker In The Rear) thing. Turrnetine, Branford ManaIU and saxophonists may not play with the recorded in one or two days (mostly "It's only a Texan saying. Nothing Joshua Redman. The relatively ~ung spontaneity of John Coltrane, and live on a two-track). We took about a more then that. We were gonna title ages, especially Redman, of this all Hargrove himself does not mimic week for the second one, but we never our second album 'Beer 'Thirty' but star saxophone collection makes the Miles Davis' "'cool jazz" sound, the' looked at Gibby as a producer, it was Sub Pop didn't really get it When you grace and subtlety of With the Teno,.. more .like a collaboration. He's a good are in Texas and someone asks you Finly Trutceclioo ;.. a former Vega. of Our Ti11U! make it an essential friend of ours, and he did a great job. what time it is, you say, 'It's beer LoU1f8e lIi1zger who U now enjqyi118 a addition to any modem jazz library. thirty,' meaning it's thirty minutes lucrative second career Q4 vice-prelli Drew Pete,.. never WeartlllOCk4. over drinking time. Actually, I'm a dentoftM United Statu
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