HELSINKI TIMES TV GUIDE 5 – 11 JANUARY 2012 21

monday 9.1. tuesday 10.1.

TV1 MTV3 NELONEN TV1 MTV3 NELONEN

09:30 Fork to Fork 10:05 The Young and the Restless 10:00 Heartbeat 10:05 The Young and the Restless Part 1/6. 13:05 Doctors 11:05 YLE News in English 11:00 Emmerdale 10:00 Heartbeat 14:05 At the End of My Leash 12:30 The Green Green Grass 13:15 Doctors 11:05 YLE News in English 15:05 Better Off Ted 17:10 Heartbeat 14:15 Amazing Race 11:10 Carbon Hunters DOC 17:00 The Bold and the Beautiful 19:00 Joanna Lumley’s Nile DOC 15:15 Two and a Half Men The carbon trading business 18:00 Emmerdale Part 2/4. The journey 17:00 The Bold and the Beautiful was supposed to reduce 21:00 C.S.I. Miami continues from Aswan 18:00 Emmerdale carbon emissions and slow 22:35 In Plain Sight to northern Sudan by 21:00 Love Bites down global warming. The 23:35 Burn Notice ferry. Lumley explores the 22:35 C.S.I. Miami Private Valentine - Blonde & Dangerous documentary is about the treasures of the Nubian 23:35 Nip/Tuck The Dirty Dozen TV5 21:00 people who find, package, pharaohs. On her way to 00:35 30 Rock TV2 22:05 and sell carbon credits,and SUB Khartoum she meets nomads then take a cut from the sale. 07:00 Children’s Programming living in the wasteland. 07:00 Children’s Programming 12:30 The Green Green Grass 08:00 Sturm der Liebe 08:30 Gary Unmarried 21:00 Downton Abbey SUB 08:30 Gary Unmarried SERIES BEGINS. Keep on In German. 09:00 James Martin: Sweet 09:00 James Martin: Sweet Running. The British sitcom 08:55 Marienhof 09:30 A Baby Story 08:00 Sturm der Liebe 09:30 A Baby Story follows the life of Boycie, In German. 10:00 Bulging Brides TV2 In German. 10:00 Bulging Brides his wife Marlene and their 14:00 The Mask 10:30 Property Virgins 08:55 Marienhof Kirsten has gained weight son Tyler. 14:30 George of the Jungle 13:00 A Baby Story 06:50 Children’s Programming In German. during the time she’s been 17:10 Heartbeat 15:00 Criss Angel: Mindfreak 13:30 Bulging Brides In Finnish. 14:00 The Mask dating her future husband. 15:30 Make Me a Supermodel 14:00 Property Virgins 08:48 The Flying Doctors 14:30 George of the Jungle Now she can’t fit into her 16:30 Marienhof 14:30 James Martin: Sweet 11:10 Die Schwarzwaldklinik 15:00 Criss Angel: Mindfreak wedding dress. TV2 In German. 15:00 Pink Panther In German. 15:30 Make Me a Supermodel 10:30 Property Virgins 17:00 Sturm der Liebe 16:10 Life Unexpected 15:45 Animal Hospital 16:30 Marienhof 13:00 A Baby Story 06:50 Children’s Programming In German. 18:10 Married... with Children Sarajevo’s mine dogs at In German. Dawn and John’s second child In Finnish. 18:00 World Palooza 20:00 America’s Next Top Model their worksite. Two ponies 17:00 Sturm der Liebe is born three weeks early. 08:50 The Flying Doctors 18:30 Will & Grace Model Beth Stern teaches are looking for a new home. In German. Dawn is afraid that her mother 09:45 Globe Trekker: Istanbul 19:00 Friends the girls different kinds of Is there a rattlesnake in an 18:30 Will & Grace won’t get to the hospital in 11:05 Die Schwarzwaldklinik 19:30 United States of Tara facial expressions, and they empty apartment? The show 19:00 Friends time to support her. In German. 20:00 Glee practice by imitating Tyra. is hosted by Rolf Harris. 19:30 Two and a Half Men 13:30 10 Years Younger: The 16:15 Heartland 21:00 Lethal Weapon 2 FILM In the photo shoot the girls 16:15 Heartland 20:00 Big Bang Theory Challenge 17:00 Children’s Programming Two detectives fight a apply what they have learned 17:00 Children’s Programming 20:30 Simpsons 14:30 James Martin: Sweet In Finnish. criminal hiding behind by expressing certain colours. In Finnish. 22:30 Skins 15:00 Pink Panther 22:05 Winners and Losers diplomatic immunity. 21:00 Good Wife 20:30 Wallace and Gromit’s 23:30 Heroes 15:05 Build a New Life in the SERIES BEGINS. Four friends Directed by Richard Donner. 2 2:00 Nurse Jackie World of Invention 00:25 Harry & Paul Country who were bullied in school Starring: Mel Gibson, 22:35 Californication Part 6/6. From A to B. 01:00 C.S.I. New York 16:05 Extreme Makeover: Home meet ten years later in a class Danny Glover, Joe Pesci, 23:25 Frasier Wallace and Gromit explore Edition reunion. Old roles die hard, Joss Ackland. Frasier’s high school crush incredible transportation 17:10 Dr. Phil but will the former losers USA/1989 returns. Frasier becomes inventions from around the TV5 18:10 Married... with Children finally become winners? 23:15 C.S.I. New York a private teacher to get globe. People have stretched 21:00 NCIS 22:55 Rush (K15) 00:15 Claire Richards: My Big to know the woman of his the limits of imagination 06:50 Grounded for Life 22:00 4D: Michael Jackson & the Fat Wedding dreams. by inventing peculiar new 07:15 The King of Queens Doctor: a Fatal Friendship 01:25 Merlin 23:55 Married... with Children transport devices. The duo 07:40 The King of Queens A documentary about YLE TEEMA 00:25 NCIS Los Angeles finds out how to cross a river 08:05 Airport Michael Jackson’s doctor The NCIS is trying to figure in a plastic bag. 09:40 The Little Couple Conrad Murray’s trial, 17:00 Maps: Power, Plunder and TV5 out how come a sweet old 22:05 The Dirty Dozen FILM 13:10 Around the World for Free including interviews with the Possession DOC lady is involved in preparing A classic war film about 14:35 That 70’s Show doctor and video material Part 1/3. 07:05 Grounded for Life lethal botulinum toxin. convicted soldiers who 15:00 Relic Hunter from Jackson’s last rehearsal. 17:50 Rick Stein’s Far Eastern 07:55 The Little Couple 01:20 Legend of the Seeker are lead into a mass 15:55 Airport 23:25 Frasier Odyssey 08:25 The Hottest Home Baker assassination mission. 16:30 Hale and Pace 23:55 Married... with Children Part 1/6. Chef Rick Stein 09:45 Big Spender Directed by Robert Aldrich. 17:00 America’s Funniest Home 00:25 Tracey Ullman explores the treats the Far 14:35 DC Cupcakes JIM Starring: Lee Marvin, Charles Videos 01:25 Body of Proof East has to offer. He begins 15:00 Relic Hunter Bronson, Robert Ryan, Telly 17:30 My Wife and Kids 02:25 Good Wife his journey in Cambodia 15:55 Airport 13:35 Border Security: Savalas. USA/1967 18:00 That 70’s Show where he tastes spicy crabs 16:30 Hale and Pace Australia’s Front Line 18:30 The King of Queens and other delicacies. 17:00 America’s Funniest Home Season 5 rerun. 19:00 The King of Queens JIM 18:50 Cuéntame cómo pasó Videos 14:05 Sliced YLE TEEMA 19:30 America’s Funniest Home In Spanish. 17:30 My Wife and Kids 14:30 Madhouse Videos 12:00 Fifth Gear 20:05 Entre les deux, la vie DOC 18:00 That 70’s Show 15:20 Anthony Bourdain: No 18:00 Il était une fois... Les 20:30 The Fast Show 12:30 Dirty Jobs The birth of her child 18:30 The King of Queens Reservations enfants du paradis DOC 21:00 Disturbing Behaviour 13:20 Border Security: brought director Valérie 19:00 The King of Queens 16:10 Dinner Impossible Directed by Julie Bonan ja (K-15) FILM Australia’s Front Line Winkler to the basics of life. 19:30 America’s Funniest Home 17:00 Man v. Food Serge July. In French. A doctor takes on a task in 13:50 Sliced The documentary follows Videos 17:30 New York City Food Show 19:00 Un village Français which he has to transform 14:15 Iron Chef UK newborn babies, the fatally 20:30 The Fast Show 18:00 Dragon’s Den In French. unruly teenagers into 15:10 Dragon’s Den ill and people close to them. 21:00 Private Valentine - Blonde 19:00 Surf Patrol 20:00 Rick Stein’s Taste of upstanding citizens. A new 16:05 Pawn Stars In French. & Dangerous FILM 19:30 South Park Italian Opera DOC kid in the town suspects 16:30 Fifth Gear 22:00 Mama kommt! FILM A young actress joins the 20:00 The Crocodile Hunter Inspired by operas composed that things aren’t what they 18:00 Dragon’s Den A relationship comedy about army after everything in 21:00 Cold Case Files: Unholy by Rossini, Puccini and Verdi, seem. Directed by David 19:00 Pawn Stars a woman whose nightmare her life has gone wrong. Bible Rick Stein explores the Nutter. Starring: James 19:30 South Park is realized when her mother Directed by Steve Miner. A man in Texas is suspected connection between good Marsden, Katie Holmes, 20:00 Customs moves into her apartment. Starring: Keiko Agena, for cruel crimes. In Colorado food and Italian operas of the Nick Stahl. USA/Australia/ 21:00 JIM D: Ancient Aliens Germany/2010. In German. Randy Bordelon, a young woman lost the 19th century. Canada/1998 22:00 Pawn Stars Jennifer Finley. most important person in 22:35 Dr. Steve-O 22:30 Trigger Happy TV USA/2009 her life as a child and now 23:00 Private Valentine - Blonde 23:00 South Park 22:55 5D: Why men watch porn she is in search of justice. & Dangerous FILM Cartman is sent to future (K-15) 22:00 Pawn Stars Directed by Steve Miner. where there is no Nintendo 23:55 Fun with Dick and Jane 22:30 Wildest Vacation Videos Starring: Keiko Agena, Wii. Will he manage to return FILM (K15) Randy Bordelon, Jennifer to his own time or is he Directed by Dean Parisot. 23:00 South Park Finley, Cory Patt, Jessica trapped in the future for good? Starring: Jim Carrey, 23:30 Naked and Funny Simpson. USA/2009 23:30 Naked and Funny Tea Leoni, Alec Baldwin. 00:00 JIM D Biography: John 00:55 Sexcetera (K18) 00:00 Cold Case Files: Unholy Winners and Losers USA/2005 Belushi Part 2/2. Skins 02:00 Navy NCIS Bible TV2 22:05 02:00 Flashpoint 00:55 The Real A & E SUB 22:30 03:20 Relic Hunter 00:55 The Real A & E

Nick Barlow [email protected]. The writer knows the art of channel surfing.

exciting tour bus escapade from 1982, he randomly starts air drum- ming or gurning for no apparent reason, he drops random ‘fucks’ on Idols – KO! prime-time TV, and he was in Hanoi Rocks. Beat that, Sherlock. Hullo! Happy New Year and all that. Hope you had a good Christ- By the way, if you’re wondering why Koivuniemi is so annoying, mas. Mine was alright, thanks for asking, but I can’t help feeling even if she’s probably a nice enough person, it’s mainly because she nervous about the year to come. This being Finland, a country has the habit of nodding her head to the music out of time, which that hasn’t had a good telly show for, er, ever, it doesn’t do anyone drives me bonkers. any good to expect too much in the way of televisual innovation. Anyway, this is no normal music show! The twist, such as it is, is Nonetheless, I was hoping for a bit more adventurous program- that the judges can’t see the contestants until they approve them, ming than the currently announced shows for this year, which thus ensuring the voting is based on the actual singing rather seem to be almost exactly the same as last year, i.e. pointless real- than tight pants or cleavage. When they vote yes their chairs spin ity shows, new seasons for domestic soap operas and repeats of around like rejects from a 1960s Star Trek episode and they clap imported dross. their eyes on the crooner in question. Nelonen’s latest great ‘reality’ show hope is Dutch-conceived It’s actually a pretty good idea. There’s way too much emphasis The Voice of Finland. This is a show about singing and is basically on the good-looking these days, I reckon, and I speak only as one the direct rival to MTV3’s eternally naff Idols. On the face of it, of the more aesthetically-challenged members of the community. Voice of Finland is yet another dull performance show for boring So it’s quite nice to have the voice as the sole judging criteria. The people who want to be ‘famous’ (hah!). It’s fronted by four quite contestants themselves are likewise pretty good, although you can well-known Finnish musicians: Elastinen, one half of the popular bet that they don’t show the worst ones. Finnish rap group Finntelligens; Lauri Tähkä, a moderately ad- As usual with Nelonen, the main question for the viewer is can mired singer; the omnipresent and somewhat annoying schlager you stand the amateur editing, shoddy set-up, poor camerawork star Paula Koivuniemi; and the most celebrity of them all, Michael and generally third-rate production values? For myself, until some- Monroe of Hanoi Rocks fame – a coup if ever I saw one. Monroe one hires some decent producers and set designers I’ll not be ‘lik- is the archetypal glam-rock God. He almost always wears dark ing’ this on Facebook quite yet. Mind you, Voice of Finland is about glasses, and when he doesn’t he seems to be reliving a particularly a million times better than Idols, not that that’s saying much.