Planes Planes Are the Universes of the Magic Multiverse
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Deszmond Touray September 2, 2015 Magic: the Gathering Jump Feedback: [email protected] Planes Planes are the universes of the Magic Multiverse. Blah blah, mana, blah blah, ptolemaic model,, roll 1d8 1d12. 1)Dominaria Generic fantasy hub/center of the multiverse… until two dickweeds detonated a [cards are from the Time Spiral block] magical nuke, plunging the plane into a magical nuclear winter. But to complete this Mad Max Package, you’re still going to need… Free Drawback: Mad Max/Minnie: whatever you need to survive, you’re going to have a hard time finding it. 2)Zendikar ...Australia. Replace the wildlife with Lovecraftian horrors and the ground with a [cards are from the Zendikar and Battle for magical storm/mental illness called the Roil, Zendikar blocks] and you end up with a safer version of Austrailia. Free Drawback: The Eldrazi Hunter: Emrakul, Ulamog, and Kozilek(imagine the Outer Gods, but even less stoppable) are in the mood for shrimp on the barby. And everything’s a shrimp. 3) Innistrad Planet Transylvania. It’s been in the middle of a vampire apocalypse, but thankfully, the [cards are from the Innistrad block] angel Avacyn is keeping the dark forces in check. Free Drawback: Fright Night: Round 2: The angel Avacyn and the demon Griselbrand are playing a game of planar chess, with you as a pawn. And before you start going Rambo, Avacyn is indestructible and Griselbrand has Lifelink. You’ll know what that is later 4)Mirrodin Metal plane. Metal trees, Quicksilver(but not mercury) seas, and 5 suns that regulate the [cards are from the Scars of Mirrodin block] plane with their mana. And the remains of a war against the Phyrexians(think cyber-Nazis with a body horror element). The people have metal growths instead of body hair. Pack a lunch. Deszmond Touray September 2, 2015 Magic: the Gathering Jump Feedback: [email protected] Free Drawback: Jose’s Landscaping Service: Razorgrass in your bed, in your food, under your shirt. Dammit, Jose! 5)Shandalar The new generic fantasy hub. More mana than its denizens know what to do with. [cards are from the Magic 2015 core set] Free Drawback: Too Much Mana: Due to the abundance of mana, your spells have an 50% chance of shorting out fro the mana surge. Painfully. Pack some spare limbs. 6)Kamigawa Planet Japan. Shinto-inspired spirits and [cards are from the Kamigawa block] mortals are getting along now. Free Drawback: Turning Japanese: The denizens of Kamigawa take honor as seriously as a fanfiction writer takes canon on opposite day. And you represent Jump- Chan. 7)Theros Planet Greco-Rome. Enchantments are not only cast, but also forged and born. With [cards are from the Theros block] enough devotion, the gods themselves may fight by your side Free Drawback: One Does Not Simply Planeswalk out of Theros: You die, you get sent to underworld, forge a gold mask, and have your self(no, that’s not a typo) erased. You resist, you get poked with a weapon specifically designed to wipe overpowered beings from existence. In effect, the choice to stay is made for you. 8) Ravnica* Planet New York, except for ten guilds that are functional parodies of the colors they [cards are from the Return to Ravnica block] represent. Free Drawback: The Explicit Maze: Each guild has a figurative dog in the literal race to stop the Supreme Verdict(which will destroy everyone) from going off. That race takes place in a maze… and that maze is an asshole! 9) Tarkir* Planet China, which explains the western- [cards are from the Khans block] style dragons. Free Drawback: 1984: You have a symbol of what would have been your clan tattooed somewhere on you. Be sure the Dragonlords Deszmond Touray September 2, 2015 Magic: the Gathering Jump Feedback: [email protected] don’t see it. 10) Nicol Bolas’s Meditation Realm Roll 1d6. One a 1, you get dissolved into mana quicker than you can say “land, go”. This would be the part where you get sent home if there were anything left to send home. Don’t worry, the stuff you’ll no longer be needing is fully intact, including the key/portal to your… ware… house… … … I guess now’s a bad time to tell you Nicol Bolas is a planeswalker, and not just because you no longer exist either… Oh, you didn’t roll a 1? In that case, you make it out of a magic condo with a bag of S- grade weed that was just laying there on the table at the time, along with a free pick 11) Alara* One plane that split into five, and later [cards are from the Shards of Alara block] rejoined in an explosion of mana called the Conflux. Unfortunately, a dragon named Nicol Bolas already used it to achieve his current godlike state. Free Drawback: Odd Job: Nicol Bolas, future conqueror of the Magicverse, has some jobs for you. Whatever you can imagine(especially in the realm of getting out of your contract), he’s been there, done that, got the whole three-piece suit. 12) Blind Eternities You have five minutes until you are completely dissolved into the Aether and it’s miles to the nearest plane! Get busy swimmin’ or get busy dyin’. Also, free pick *These planes have factions you may be eligible to start off in. Until the official supplement is up, use common sense and http://mtgsalvation.gamepedia.com. **When I said free, I meant mandatory Deszmond Touray September 2, 2015 Magic: the Gathering Jump Feedback: [email protected] Color There are five colors of magic, which both describe the caster and their spells. You can draw mana of your color(s) from the land around you. You start as the color that most represents you. Now who exact is this WUBRG fellow? ● White ○ The color of goodness, unity, and justice at best, and suppression, tyranny, and “justice” at worst. White (more like desert sand mica) specializes in exiling things to the Aether and mustering small creatures into great forces. ○ You best draw mana from the rolling plains, especially in the daytime. ○ Mother Teresa and Adolf Hitler would be white. ● blUe ○ The color of reason, knowledge, and enlightenment at best, and cold- heartedness, apathy, and unethicality at worst. Blue specializes in the elements of air and water, as well as the mind. ○ You best draw mana from the cool, wet islands and the sea around them. ○ Isaac Newton and Unit 731 would be blue ● Black ○ The color of ambition at best, and outright douchebaggery at worst. Black specializes in death, assholes, and more death, except for this one con artist... ○ You best draw mana from swamps and the decay beneath them. ○ Isaac Newton and Unit 731 would be blue ● Red ○ The color of emotion, freedom, and individuality at best, and anger, hedonism, and recklessness at worst. Red specializes in the elements of earth and fire, as well as hitting stuff in the face… and feels ○ You best draw mana from solid mountains. ○ William Wallace and Davy Crockett would be red. Deszmond Touray September 2, 2015 Magic: the Gathering Jump Feedback: [email protected] ● Green ○ The color of nature, balance, and zen at best, and savagery, luddism, and ignorance at worst. Green specializes in the forces of nature, the circle of life, and the land… and hitting stuff in the face ○ You best draw mana from verdant forests. ○ Buddha would be green. ● Notes ○ You can draw mana from any source, but when drawn from sources outside of your color(s), it is colorless mana, which is both versatile and useless. ○ Most magic accords to a color, hence magic outside of your color(s) is simply inaccessible. Backgrounds Listing specific creature types and classes would require two novel- length supplements… each... so here’s something a bit more accessible. FYI, morphing time is on hold for now, so no alt forms. Oh, and here’s your thousand-choice-point budget. Also, factions have colors other than your own, which you may unlock in time. ● Drop-In(Rated Free for Everyone) ○ Choose one of your forms and get comfy with it: you’ll be stuck in that form(the Shapeshifter creature type notwithstanding) for the jump’’s duration ○ Other than that, you know the drill. ○ Magic: the Abridging(+0 CP): Enjoy that normal day while it lasts, because starting the midnight after you enter, the fourth wall is good as demolished, lampshades are a matter of legal mandate, and everybody and their mother will be increasingly out of character. ○ The Movie(+100 CP): Wizards of the Cost will bring the people of your homeworld the best licensed clusterfuck since Disney Infinity, scheduled to release the summer after you get your spark. Hideo Kojima and Guillermo Del Toro are the lead writers, while Michael Bay and JJ Abrams are in charge of effects. Oh, and it’ll be co-directed by Peter Jackson and Uwe Boll. Scene 1. Take 1. Action! Deszmond Touray September 2, 2015 Magic: the Gathering Jump Feedback: [email protected] ● Character(100) ○ The little guys that represent their respective color day-to-day. They start off as 1/1s( about as strong and tough as an average human of your sex) WIthout further ado, your choices... ○ Soldier(requires white) ■ Your willingness to work with others is directly proportional to your apparent will to live. ■ You know a thing or two about group tactics, teamwork and all that jazz, but a mixed bag individually. ■ You can keep your base form’s creature types(human, vampire, gem, whatever), and get a free weapon and uniform to boot! ○ Merfolk(requires blue) ■ natural-born swimmer/diver, and not just ‘cause you’re a fish person.