SEVENTH ISSUE

The Right Attitude of Beginning Gratitude

‘My husband Halal and I Fun compete Activities over grades for Muslim and Families modules’ IOU Book App: READ ON THE GO

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The family is the basic building block of a society

advised his (ﷺ) Everything in this world will perish. However, have a conflict. Our Prophet some things last longer than others. A strong Ummah: base will keep a building standing for hundreds “A believing man should not hate a of years. But, a small earthquake can bring down believing woman; if he dislikes one of her a very tall building with a weak base. A character characteristics, he will be pleased with is the base of a person. A marriage is the base of another.” (Sahih Muslim) a family. The family is the base of a society. If the base is righteous and strong, so will be the rest. This hadith can be applied to all spheres of a Muslim’s life. Whenever a person finds something The secret to a strong family, hence society, bad, he should look at the good and keep that in is to follow commands and advices of our mind. This will allow him to search for the good Lord. No tradition should ever replace what is in everything and everyone, and overlook faults commanded by Allah. His Wisdom should be our and mistakes of others. guide. A strong connection with Him will help us walk the right path.This will bring out the best of Righteous individuals will create righteous us inside and outside of our homes. families who in turnt will create righteous societies. A family is the first place where we learn how to interact with others around us. It is impossible — Veronika Matulova to live together, agree on everything and never

SEVENTH ISSUE MEET THE TEAM YOUR VIEWS

Publisher : Islamic Online University We would love to you hear from you. Please let The Right us know what you liked or would like to see in Attitude of Editor-in-Chief : Dr. Bilal Philips Beginning Gratitude the magazine. If you have a particular piece or ‘My husband Managing Editor : Veronika Matulova feel you can make a valuable contribution to IOU Halal and I Fun compete Activities over grades Marketing Director : Hira Adnan Insights please email: [email protected] for Muslim and Families modules’ Designs & Layout : Fatimah Bint Aboobacker Cover Design : Fatimah Bint Aboobacker Editors : Aishah Ahmed Farzana Hussain Sadia Chunawala

Copyright 2016 by IOU Insights. All rights reserved. This publication may contain information which is copyrighted by others. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form without the prior written permission of the copyright holder. IOU Insights reserves the right to reject any advertisement. Readers should verify information directly with advertisers. Writers’ opinions are not necessarily those of IOU Insights.

3 Contents IOU BRIGHTENS ‘MY HUSBAND AND I COMPETE OVER THE FUTURE OF 20 GRADES AND MODULES’ 06 NIGERIAN My name is Roshan Razvi. I have been... EDUCATION In April and June 2016, CAN BABIES GO TO HELL? Dr. Bilal Philips was... 22 The birth of a child is usually considered as something wonderful and... IOU’S STUDENTS 08 EAGER TO IOU REPRESENTATIVES AROUND THE SPREAD 24 WORLD KNOWLEDGE The representatives and volunteers ... IN CANADA In May 2016, Dr. Bilal PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH Philips arrived in ... 28 Parenthood is a journey where you play the role of a teacher and your... WINNING THE HEARTS OF 10 GHANAIANS: DR. IOU EXAM CENTERS BILAL’S MUCH 30 The Islamic Online University exam centers and AWAITED VISIT proctors play an integral role in fulfilling our... Upon Dr. Bilal’s arrival in Ghana on ... DISSOLUTION OF MARRIAGE: COMMON 32 MISUNDERSTANDINGS HALAL FUN All praise is due to Allah Alone. May His ... ACTIVITIES FOR 13 MUSLIM FAMILIES ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE (PART 1) Upon Dr. Bilal’s arrival in 38 She opens her wardrobe. Two dozen dresses of Ghana on ... red, yellow, orange, pink, and you-name-it... SMILE FOR THE CAMERA: THE IOU THE RIGHT BEGINNING was reported by Abu Hurayrah ﷺ PHOTOSHOOT 41 The Prophet 15 CONTEST to have... Islamic Online University’s Promotions HAFSA BINT SIRIN: A PROMINENT Department ... 42 SCHOLAR Hafsa bint Sirin was a distinguished faqiha... PLANTING THE SEEDS OF LOVE: AN INTRODUCTION TO THE CLIENT- 18 MAKING OUR 44 CENTERED THERAPY EDUCATION Client-centered therapy (CCT) is a type of ... TECHNIQUES AGE APPROPRIATE ‘ACCEPTING ISLAM EARNED ME A SLAP “Didn’t I tell you to...?” I 48 FROM MY FATHER AND TORTURE’ heard my 5-year old... Modern Christianity is money-oriented...

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5 IOU brightens the future of Nigerian Education

n April and June 2016, Dr. Bilal by 1-Ummah. Prominent imams This encourages IOU’s students in Philips was invited by two Islamic of Abuja mosques, clerics, Nigeria to continue their studies organizations in Nigeria—Light and government officials were and in sha Allah, they will be able to of the Ummah and 1-Ummah. amongst the audience. In addition use their certificates in the country. IHe held talks and visited six states to the public lecture, Dr. Bilal therein: Kano, Kaduna, Abuja, Sokoto, Philips’ visited the management In Rivers State, Port Harcourt, Dr. Lagos, and Rivers. of Al Jaaiz Bank, the first Islamic Bilal Philips delivered a public bank in Nigeria. The meeting gave lecture at the Al Usra Islamic During Dr. Bilal’s stay, he paid a Dr. Bilal the chance to promote Organization Mosque. After his courtesy visit to the Emir of Kano IOU’s Islamic Banking and Finance main lecture, he featured on a live and Sultan of Sokoto, and had course to the authorities of the program on a popular radio station meetings with the Council of financial house. known as Info FM and discussed Ulamas in the country, as well as Ramadan, religious tolerance, and IOU students in each state. After his lectures in Abuja, global terrorism. IOU’s Nigeria team and Dr. Bilal In Sokoto State, the event was a Philips visited the NUC (National Workshops with Dr. Bilal on very memorable one, as over 5000 Universities Commission of Nigeria) Islamization of knowledge were people attended his lecture at to seek accreditation for IOU; so organized in Abuja and Kaduna for the Usman Dan Fodio University that the IOU certificates would be private Islamic schools in the two Stadium. His tour in the country recognized by the government. states. was an inspiration to the Muslims Thus, allowing IOU’s graduates to In conclusion, Dr. Bilal’s visit to who learned about their religion study further in any of the country’s Nigeria was a very successful trip and it helped promote IOU in the universities. country to a large extent. and contributed to the promotion Likewise, IOU Nigeria team and Dr. of IOU among Nigerians, especially In Lagos State, while speaking at Bilal visited the National Assembly among Muslims. the I-EXPO (Workshop for Muslim of Nigeria and met with the Entrepreneurs), Dr. Bilal promoted Chairman House Committee on the business administration course Education, Honourable Sulaiman offered by IOU. Aminu in their efforts to get IOU By Akindele Abdullah recognized by the country’s In the following days, during the Br. Akindele is the IOU national government. Alhamdulillah, Hon. representative of Nigeria. He holds a B.A. blessed month of Ramadan, Sulaiman promised the team that in Linguistics from the University of Ilorin, hundreds of people attended his he would use his position in the Nigeria. He is currently pursuing an M.A. public lecture in Abuja, organized assembly to fulfill his commitment. at the University of Malaya in Malaysia.

6 Sokoto: A keen audience at the Usman Dan Fodio University Stadium

Dr. Bilal meeting with Hon. Sulaiman Aminu, Chairman House Committee on Education

Sokoto: Dr. Bilal speaking about the Dr. Bilal and Ameer of 1-Ummah speaking to the Info FM importance of the Quran studio audience

7 IOU’s Students Eager to Spread Knowledge in Canada

Dr. Bilal giving a lecture at the Abu Huraira Center

Jumu’ah Khutbah at Abu Hurairah Islamic Center Event at the Quran and Hadith Society, Scarborough, Canada n May 20th, Dr. Bilal gave n May 2016, Dr. Bilal Philips the khutbah at the Abu arrived in Toronto, Canada. O Huraira Islamic Center I Although his visit was a in North York, Canada, located fairly short one, it was filled with just northeast of Toronto. This many events and engagements; center has been very supportive Prayer at the Abu Huraira Center including a Jumu’ah khutbah, of IOU and is not only an official a meet-and-greet program for exam center but also goes out of IOU’s students, lectures at the its way to meet the needs of IOU earning a livelihood or similar Gambian Conference and the ISNA students by hosting many IOU work, so it can be a significant Conference, and a program at the programs and meetings. part of our lives and one that we Quran and Hadith Center. are responsible for on the Day of The topic of the khutbah should Judgment. The visit presented an excellent be of interest to most of us opportunity to reach out to the who work to earn a living; as he Unfortunately, we find that there Muslim community and remind addressed the life of a Muslim in are Muslims who try to put as little them of their duty to Allah, their the work environment and what effort into their work as possible. fellow Muslims, and the citizens of our attitude should be toward He cautioned the Muslims to Canada. Of course, it was also a great work. An interesting point he fulfill their agreements and chance to spread the word about mentioned was that humans contracts and put forth an honest IOU and the great opportunity to generally spend most of their effort to our work, as indicated in gain authentic Islamic knowledge. living hours in the pursuit of the Quran and Sunnah.

8 Dr. Bilal explaining the history and the effort put into getting the University up and running at the “Meet- and-Greet with Dr. Bilal Philips” event organized by the IOU Student Committee in Toronto

Meet-and-Greet IOU’s committee) regarding studying in which they can be involved Students: Event in the at the IOU and being a part of the in spreading the word to their IOU local student committee, communities. One attendee Greater Toronto Area followed by a lecture by Dr. Bilal in particular attended the last and a Q&A session. monthly committee meeting and conveyed how he had taken he major event of interest Dr. Bilal spoke about “The Legacy huge steps to reach out to many during the visit was “The of the IOU” and explained the Islamic centers and schools Meet-and-Greet with T history and the effort that was in the region with the goal of Dr. Bilal Philips” organized by put into getting the University promoting IOU. He is presently the IOU Student Committee in up and running, as well as many working on an IOU training Toronto, which took place on of the challenges faced in the project involving Islamic schools May 23 (a holiday in Canada). process. The audience eagerly and Canadian Muslim teachers. Current students and potential absorbed the information students from various parts of the and followed up the lecture We pray this event will be a Greater Toronto Area, as well as with intelligent and inquisitive means of guiding others toward other parts of Ontario, attended. questions. the true teachings of Islam and The purpose of the event was keep those on this path steadfast to present an opportunity for On the whole, the program until they meet their Lord. IOU and potential students to attracted about 50 brothers and meet each other, Dr. Bilal, and 30-40 sisters. After the lecture the committee, and gain more and Q&A session, the attendees insight about the University. had an opportunity to chat with By M. Mubarak Ibrahim Dr. Bilal and the committee members. Br. Mubarak is the President of the IOU The program started with Student Committee in Toronto, Canada. a PowerPoint presentation He holds a Bachelor of Applied Science One of the positive outcomes of (Computer Engineering). He is presently by Brother Rahil (a student the program was that a number pursuing the B.A.I.S. program at the and member of the student of students inquired about ways Islamic Online University.

9 10 WINNING THE HEARTS OF GHANAIANS Dr. Bilal’s Much Awaited Visit

Day 1: Arrival at Kotoka International Day 2: On the Airwaves Airport Dr. Bilal visited Marhaba FM and Metro TV Upon Dr. Bilal’s arrival in Ghana on February where he delivered a few lectures and also 4, 2016, there was a press conference which spoke about IOU and its programs. The focussed on his mission in Ghana and also program was open to a live Q&A session and the Islamic Online University. The entire listeners were given the opportunity to call in leadership of the ASWAJ, led by the First and ask Dr. Bilal questions. Deputy National Imam, were at the airport to welcome Dr. Bilal Philips. After giving the khutbah in al Hashim Mosque, Dr. Bilal Philips began his series of talks in Ghana with the topic, “Insurgency in God’s Name - Revelation or Rebellion.” There were more than 1500 attendees, and it served as a good platform to promote IOU.

Day 3: Spreading the Message Day 3 began with a talk with Muslim professionals, both from the public and private sectors, followed by a major program at Dogo Moro Park, Kumasi, based on the theme of Day 4: University Dawa spreading the message. Here too, we had a After meeting the Muslim professionals and 1000 strong audience. duaat in Kumasi, we proceeded to Kwame

11 Nkrumah University of Science and Technology, Prison Project where the fourth lecture took place. The program Dr. Bilal met with Sheikh Dr. Amin Bonsu, CEO was attended by Professor Sulel, College of of Ameen Scientific Herbal Medicine, at his Engineering, Dr. Salifu, and other senior officers residence, in order to discuss the arrangement of the University. This was a good opportunity of a study center and some support to revive the for us to promote IOU, and it was met with great IOU Ghana Prison Project. enthusiasm by the students and staff alike. We also received an invitation from the From the University, we proceeded to meet management of Al Huda Society to meet with Fatima Fareeda, Proprietor of a school, to reverts and to visit the newly established Islamic discuss the possibilities of leasing out one of TV station in Ghana (Guidance TV). their old premises; to serve as the main IOU Ashanti Region Learning and Exam Center. Workshop on Islamization of the Islamic Curriculum Dr. Bilal Philips took this opportunity to organize a workshop for International Islamic Schools that are willing to Islamize programs in their schools.

Meeting IOU Students in the Ghana Office Dr. Bilal’s visit to Ghana was concluded with a special meeting with IOU’s students at the IOU Ghana office, where students had the opportunity to discuss with their Chancellor their studies and challenges they face.

One of the major developments that took place is the lecture at Ambraiya Central Mosque. It had a massive turnout of over 5000 attendees. Dr. Bilal was heard by the people in Tamale on radio and throughout the country through affiliate radio stations.

Broadcasting Legion University students’ benefited from their fourth program at Legion University and later on Dr. Bilal went live on the University Campus Radio, GH Islamic Online Radio, and Guidance TV.

By Samudeen Yusif

Br. Samudeen is the IOU Ghana Representative. He holds a Master of Business Administration (Marketing) from the Ghana Business School, B.Ed. (Management Option) from the University of Cape Coast and a Certificate in Project Management, Accra, Ghana.

12 1. Beneficial videos

These could be Islamic videos, HALAL documentaries, or educational shows. It includes any videos which have a clean, moral content and promote beneficial knowledge. Build a home library of videos ACTIVITIES that you approve of and allow FUN your children time to benefit from these videos. This is a far healthier alternative to television channels; FOR as we cannot control the content on MUSLIM such channels. FAMILIES Having fun is a crucial aspect of the development of young people. As Muslim parents, it is our duty to create an environment in which our children can have halal, clean fun and grow happily. Halal fun helps young people relax, recharge, experience happiness, and deal with stress. 2. Nasheeds Whatever age your children are, give them time and space to have halal fun. Nasheeds without any musical Here are a few different types of halal instruments. Children, by their activities that are fun and your children nature, are attracted to beautiful can enjoy: sounds, and as a result, may want to listen to music. As a Muslim parent, you need to provide an alternative. Research and find nasheeds that you are comfortable with and introduce those to your children so that they have a healthy alternative to music and do not fall into the traps of Shaytan.

13 3. Sports

Watching sports may be considered a waste of time by some, but playing sports is an excellent way to stay healthy and enjoy some halal fun. Muslim parents must set up halal sporting activities in their local areas; whether these are Muslim soccer clubs, 6. Encourage beneficial martial arts studios, or gender-specific hobbies swimming pools. Sporting opportunities need to be provided for our children, so Most children develop their own hobbies. that they may enjoy halal fun and grow As parents, we should encourage our stronger in the process. children to develop hobbies that benefit them, rather than hobbies that waste time and money. If a child becomes engaged in a 4. Encourage reading beneficial hobby, they will experience hours of halal fun as well as learn a great deal Reading books is a crucial life skill that through the process. separates the successful from the weak. All Muslim parents must work toward creating Final Reminder a culture of reading in their homes. This can be done by investing in bookshelves and As Muslim parents, we sometimes become filling them with beneficial and fun, age- overzealous in forcing acts of worship upon appropriate books. our young children and forgetting to give them some time to relax. Balance is the Parents can even consider setting up a key in raising righteous children. Teach book club in which children gather, read them the religion, encourage them to a specific book, and then discuss what worship Allah, but also give them space and they learned from this book. Reading is a resources to enjoy what is halal. highly relaxing form of entertainment that stimulates the intellect and creates leaders For children, play is often a form of learning. in society. This is why we must encourage forms of entertainment in which they learn beneficial skills and knowledge while having fun. In the end, a balanced home full 5. Spend time with nature of love, deen, and halal fun produces happy families that work together to please Allah. We tend to get so caught up in city life that many Muslim children are cut off from nature. Take time out to visit places of natural beauty so that your family can relax, recharge, and learn to appreciate By Abu Muawiyah the beautiful creation of Allah. Time spent Ismail Kamdar with nature, whether through camping or Sheikh Ismail is the Faculty even just a walk in the park, can be highly Manager of Islamic Online memorable and a fun experience for the University, founder of Islamic whole family. Self Help.com, radio presenter on Radio Al-Ansaar, author of multiple publications, and a homeschooling father.

14 FORSmile THE CAMERA The IOU Photoshoot Contest

15 slamic Online University’s photoshoot contest. Promotions Department initiated an exciting global There needs to be a special contest in March 2016 for the mention of the extremely talented IIOU Student committees. The aim photographer, who helped the was to encourage its students to get Maldives sisters to achieve this involved in the community service award—Br. Adam Naif, co-owner and promoting the University. of a photo studio named, “Portrait Participants were to submit quality Album.” Despite being a very photos demonstrating various famous and busy photographer, methods of studies in the 21st he made time for this IOU task and century. lent his service free of charge. May Allah accept his intentions and A certificate of appreciation signed reward him immensely for the work by Dr. Bilal Philips, and recognition he has done. on the IOU social media and IOU Insights Magazine were allocated These activities/contests help our for the top three winners from students connect and make a more different countries and ethnicities. productive community. Hence, giving them the feel of studying in Alhamdulillah! We had received a physical university despite being submissions from various an online one. This is one of the committees some of which were: advantages of the IOU over other Nigeria, Malawi, Philippines, online universities where students Bahrain, Maldives, Gambia, feel allied to other fellow IOU Tanzania, Somaliland, and students and the University itself. Indonesia. IOU will keep working hard for Remarkable work has been its students and give them such done by all the committees opportunities to display their and the designers had a tough aptitude and talent where they time choosing the winner. An graduate with much confidence astounding job that overshadowed and flare, in sha Allah. others was of the Maldives Sisters’ Committee (winner) followed by the Bahrain Student Committee (runner-up) and the Philippines Sisters’ Committee By Faiza Shaikh (2nd runner-up) who had also Sr. Faiza is the Assistant Head of the done an outstanding job for the IOU Student Committees.

16 17 seeds of love for Allah and His religion into my children’s hearts Planting is of utmost importance, so that they “want to” and not “have to” read the Quran.

the Seeds of Unfortunately, the root cause of this imbalance is the lack of proper understanding of the Love stages of development amongst Making Our Education Techniques Age parents as well as the educators. Appropriate We do not even have to turn to Western research and theories (not that I am saying they aren’t idn’t I tell you than most 40 year olds—he is helpful), to understand the to...?” I heard my extremely perturbed. Before he kind of behavior we need to be 5-year old son started lessons with this teacher, exhibiting with our children. being scolded by my son would pick up the Qaida Sayyidina Ali advised us to play “Dhis Quran teacher, as he stumbled himself and try to recite every with our children until the age over a few words in his lesson. now and then. Now, he feels of seven, to discipline and teach discouraged and tries to avoid them from the age of seven to After an hour of a “rigorous” Quran his lessons with all sorts of fourteen and to befriend them recitation lesson, the teacher came excuses. at the age of fourteen. Now out and told me that in addition consider the oft-quoted hadith of : ﷺ to the one-hour class he takes, I I pointed out to the teacher that our beloved Prophet should sit down with my son every his methods were not quite age day—after Fajr—and revise the appropriate, only to be met with “Tell your children to pray when lesson multiple times again. a look of disdain on his face as they are seven years old and if I wasn’t serious enough about smack them (lightly) if they do The result: even though my son’s having my son learn the Quran. not pray when they are ten, and recitation is almost flawless separate them in their beds.” at age 5—with tajweed better However, for me, planting the (Abu Dawud)

18 These narrations clearly indicate natural capacities, since Allah has the attitude toward children’s had the pen lifted from the child’s upbringing exhibited by our early book of deeds, because of his limited capability and to give him ﷺ generations—lack of harshness The Prophet and formal education during the “ sufficient room to grow before he is never child’s formative years. If a prayer- held accountable for anything. the most important pillar of faith, challenged Unfortunately, we, in our quest to after the declaration of faith—is children beyond achieve “fast-food” results, have to become a part of the child’s their natural completely deserted the teachings daily routine at the age of seven, of our religion, which has led to then what can we say about the capacities. devastating results. At the end of imposition of rigorous learning the day, I would rather have a child techniques before that?! who loves to pray and recite the Quran, as opposed to someone The question which then arises is: 15-minute lessons. One of the who grows up with perfect tajweed How do we then inculcate Islam in 19th-century educators,” Charlotte whilst believing the religion is harsh. our children’s lives? Mason, recommended very short lessons in order to ensure optimum With the plethora of information The answer to that is simple: absorption of the lesson. Practice it and your children will out there, little effort is needed to navigate through the sunnah of our follow. If you are in the habit of as well as the western ,ﷺ While dealing with children, Prophet reciting the Quran every day, your parents and educators must realize child development philosophies, children will pick up that love from that in order to raise our children which speak out against unnatural, you and do likewise. to be like the great sahabi Anas, we age inappropriate learning need to raise them as the Prophet techniques. did. Let’s have a look at the ﷺ Play,” which is often cited as“ an important part of the child’s love and respect with which the May Allah guide the parents and development, is, in fact, informal treated Anas: Anas said, educators of this Ummah to plant ﷺ Prophet learning carried out by the arrived the seeds of love for this religion in ﷺ When Allah’s Apostle“ child himself in an environment at Madina, Abu Talha took hold our future generations! conducive to his developmental of my hand and brought me to needs. It involves role-playing or Allah’s Apostle and said, “O Allah’s acting out of correct morals by the Apostle! Anas is an intelligent boy, parent himself so that the child so let him serve you.” Anas added, By Sara at home Tariq ﷺ will informally pick up the right “So I served the Prophet etiquettes of daily life. and on journeys; by Allah, he never Sheikh said to me for anything which I did: If you really want to take a more “Why have you done this like this?” Sr. Sara is the IOU Student Affairs formal approach to teaching or, for anything which I did not do: Officer primarily responsible for Islam, then do not make your “Why have you not done this like communication with the students. lessons more than 15 minutes this?” [Reported by Al-Bukhari] She is currently undertaking training long, especially for boys. In fact, in Early Childhood Education and is I would recommend building What does this narration tell us? It working on her first book that will never highlight habit training in Muslim ﷺ concentration span exercises (like tells us that the Prophet playing darts) before delving into challenged children beyond their children.

19 ‘My husband and I compete over grades and modules’

y name is Roshan Razvi. I have been studying the Bachelor in Islamic Studies (B.A.I.S.) program since the Fall of 2011 (Spring 2016 is my 9th semester; four more M courses to go, in sha Allah). My husband, Abdul Quddhus, has been studying the B.M.A.I.S. (Higher Diploma) since Spring 2011; he has two courses left, in sha Allah. We are both from India but reside in Kuwait.

I chanced upon IOU when I was looking for online Arabic courses. I came across IOU’s Free Diploma in April 2011 and did a few modules in Foundations of Islamic Studies, which sparked my interest and I immediately applied for the B.A.I.S. in September 2011. I began

20 to learn a lot about Islam in this and eventually we complete the program and I suggested to my semester. husband that he join as well; Studying as a alhamdulillah, in spite of his busy “ “…But they plan, and Allah plans. schedule, he enrolled for the family has great And Allah is the best of planners.” B.M.A.I.S. program. benefits, as the (Quran 8: 30) whole family is We have three children, Centuries ago, our predecessors alhamdulillah; two sons (Tariq: ten involved in the struggled and traveled a lot years & Muadh: three years) and learning process to gain, study, and memorize a daughter (Samrah: one year). Islamic knowledge. Our struggle They are all highly inquisitive and and benefits is negligible, or perhaps cannot active, so studying with them has immensely. even be compared, as we always been a challenge and an study from the comforts of our achievement, alhamdulillah. home which is manageable, alhamdulillah. Yes, the Internet Initially, we did not face any comes along with its own learning process and benefits baggage, but IOU has pioneered problems with our study immensely. It is amusing to see schedule; however, as the family ” in providing authentic, reliable, ten-year-old Tariq speak about grew with the birth of my second low-cost Islamic knowledge, the legal maxims. Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah. and third child, things became our children are nurtured with the quite difficult, more so, since we importance of learning authentic Time management plays a crucial both work. However, we always Islamic knowledge, its practical role in online studies where share the household chores and application and propagation as everything has to be preplanned. the time spent with the children, well. Even if it does not work initially, alhamdulillah. one should not lose hope and However, our journey is not carry on while making a lot of We constantly motivate each devoid of challenges, especially du’a. We both thank Allah for other to study and complete when both parents have guiding us to the right medium at the coursework, module tests, dedicated themselves toward the right time, alhamdulillah. midterm exams, assignments gaining Islamic knowledge. There (searching for references) and are times when each or both of May Allah help us all in acquiring final exams, within the defined us have to spend a lot of time Islamic knowledge that is submission period. Since the with the kids when they are sick. beneficial in this world and in the courses of B.M.A.I.S. are common It is even more difficult when one hereafter. Ameen. to B.A.I.S. as well, my husband of us is sick, and the entire load and I usually discuss the content, of the household chores and debate the fiqh rulings, and children is on just one person. indulge in a healthy competition At times, I have even considered of who scores higher on the tests quitting the program, but my By Roshan or who completes more modules. husband’s encouragement and Razvi My eldest son, Tariq, supports his support helped me to carry father saying, ‘We boys need to on, alhamdulillah. Though we get more marks!’ usually plan ahead, panic is rife Sr. Roshan Razvi is an IOU Info/ Helpdesk officer in CIH department during the midterm and final currently pursuing her B.A. in Alhamdulillah! Studying as a exams. Many times, things do Islamic studies. She is passionate family has great benefits, as the not work out as planned, but about Islamic sciences and Arabic whole family is involved in the then Allah is the Best of Planners language..

21 Can Babies Go to Hell ?

he birth of a child is usually considered as T something wonderful and amazing. Even before the child is born, parents imagine and plan their child’s future. However, sometimes, all the joy and happiness is cut short when Allah decides to take back what has been given to them to enjoy for a while.

In order to console those devastated parents, people may tell them that their child is waiting for them in Paradise. However, is this true? Can someone get a free pass to Paradise just because the angel of death visits him or her at a very young age? Would that be just?

22 to pray ﷺ One day, a child of one of the Ansar died. When they brought the child to the Prophet for him, his wife, ‘Aishah, said: “How fortunate he is, one of the little birds of Paradise. He never answered her: “It is better not to say anything, O ﷺ did any evil or reached the age of puberty.” He ‘Aishah. Allah, the Mighty and Sublime, created Paradise and created people for it—He created them in the loins of their fathers. And He created Hell and created people for it, and He created them in the loins of their fathers.” (Sunan an-Nasa’i)

This narration indicates that it is not as straightforward as a person dying young and being guaranteed Paradise. Allah in His ultimate justice caused them to die young, yet at the same time, He will test them on the Day of Resurrection, which will determine their final abode.

They all will be resurrected with all of their faculties. Hence, they will be able to comprehend the message. According to an authentic hadith, a messenger will come to them from a wall of fire. He will inform them about the oneness of Allah and give them further information about Allah. Thus, they all will receive the message and bear witness.

A Test of Obedience

“O you who have believed, obey Allah and His Messenger and do not turn from him while you hear [his order].” (Quran 8: 20)

Thereafter, they will be commanded to enter the wall of fire. Whoever obeys him and enters Bearing Witness it, it will be cool and safe for him, and whoever disobeys him and does not enter it will be A young child who has died is at the same level dragged to it. (Sahih al Jami’) as a person who died, while he or she had no means to hear about the true and correct form of Thus, the group will be divided into those whose His message due to either health issues, time, or final abode based on their obedience is eternal location. They both have no knowledge; they are bliss and those, whose disobedience brought not held accountable. them to eternal punishment.

Based on the lecture of Dr. Bilal Philips, ‘Can babies go to Hell?’

By Veronika Matulova Sr. Veronika is the IOU Insights Managing Editor. She holds a B.A. in Islamic Studies from the IOU and is currently on the path of perfecting her Quranic recitation with Tajweed Made Easy Academy Global (TMEAG).

23 IOU REPRESEN- TATIVES GLOBAL REPRESENTATIVE / INDIA

Mohammed Shajiuddin AROUND +91 9000777950 [email protected] [email protected] www.iouindia.com THE e is the IOU Global H Representative who never shies away from challenges WORLD and is always ready to help. USA

Mutahhir Sabree Their Role They can be contacted [email protected] for queries or matters +1 803-201-7961 related to: The representatives He is a well-known daee, and volunteers form an • IOU Courses residing in South Carolina, who delivers lectures and important and integral • Enrollment part of the Islamic Online khutbas all over the USA. • IOU Promotions University. Their dedicated services to the university • Establishment of learning and exam Yasmeen Rolland represent the foundation [email protected] on which the realization of centers the IOU motto, “Changing • Acceptance of course She is a great speaker the Nation through fee payments (or fee and lives in Texas. She Education” is being transfers) has been invited by many achieved! The official organizations to give lectures • Donations to IOU on various Islamic topics. IOU representatives deal • Formation of student with local student issues, committees communication with local GHANA Islamic organizations • Appointment of local Samudeen Yusif and institutions, and tutors for tajweed +233249540148 governmental bodies, as • Queries related to the [email protected] well as networking with University regional IOU student Since his joining IOU, he has committees, learning been actively promoting IOU centers and affiliated Meet the in the country and has many institutions. Representatives: great plans to take IOU to further heights. 24 CANADA

Sr. Bibi +1 647 236 9980 [email protected] She has been a great asset to IOU. She is one of the IOU BAIS graduates, a living example of IOU. TANZANIA Lusaka Hamidu Amani NIGERIA +255 686 121386 Abdullahi Akindele [email protected] +2348133327543 He is a young and energetic [email protected] brother, who works hard to He is the country representative for make IOU known to every Nigeria; leading the most potential Tanzanian. country for IOU with dedication and hard work. KENYA Adetoro Opeyemi Muritala Abdullatif Sheikh +2348164374646 +254 722 785 964 [email protected] +254 733 592 999 [email protected] He is the representative for southern region of Nigeria. He is a well-known scholar and the national representative for Kenya, Nura Hashim residing in Nairobi. He +234 703 618 8864 lectures throughout Kenya [email protected] and abroad. Dynamic and dedicated northern Twahir Hussein Kassim Nigerian representative, who has +254 722 259223 proved to be very beneficial to IOU. +254 734 259223 coordinator.eastafrica@iou. RUSSIA edu.gm Arslan Karaev He is a resident of [email protected] Mombasa-Kenya with an IT background, who left He is basically taking care of his field to serve IOU. He is all translation work of IOU a coordinator for the East Russia. The whole project is African countries. resting on his shoulders.

25 PHILIPPINES INDONESIA

Marlon Abdullah M. Masanque Adi Wira +63 9491888499 +6281573135369 [email protected] [email protected] www.iouindonesia.com Newly joined representative, who desires to take IOU to a new level in the Philippines. He is not just an Islamic studies graduate, but a good translator, administrator, and promoter of IOU. With the PAKISTAN launch of IOU in the Indonesian language, IOU will see a huge rise in enrollments. Malik Salman [email protected] EAST AFRICA With extreme talents and great leadership skills, he is now all set Saed Abdillahi Saed to take IOU to a new direction in [email protected] Pakistan. There are a few great initiatives happening in +252 63 4428498 Pakistan under his supervision. He demonstrates outstanding efforts GAMBIA in the Somali region and other neighboring countries. He established the IEC firm in his Ousainou Allen region and is ready to replicate it in other East African +2209666612 / +2207515541 countries. [email protected] Islamic Online University UGANDA Global Headquarters 21 Kanifing Mosque Road, Gainamungu Aminah P.O. Box 2340, Kanifing South, KMC, The Gambia. +256 703864237 [email protected] Since IOU established its headquarters in The Gambia, he has been handling all IOU operations with great She has only recently joined the enthusiasm and has done a tremendous job making IOU IOU representatives team, but is run smoothly. passionate about promoting the IOU in Uganda.

SIERRA LEONE MALAWI Sheikh Alie Y. Kallay Phone: +232 76847100 / +232 Abdullah Kachala 88027334 +265 888 88 39 56 WhatsApp: +232 79516072 [email protected] [email protected] BAIS student representing IOU with A Madina University graduate, who is working hard for his heart. the TEC accreditation in Sierra Leone.

By Mohammed Shajiuddin & Veronika Matulova

Br. Shaji is the IOU Global Representative Sr. Veronika is the IOU Insights Managing as well as the IOU India representative. Editor. She holds a B.A. from the Islamic Online He is a graduate from Osmania University, University and is currently on the path of Hyderabad. perfecting her Quranic recitation with Tajweed Made Easy Academy Global (TMEAG).

26 “If we are not teaching our children Islam at home, we should not expect miracles from the Islamic schools. A good education “begins at home.”

27 Practice What You Preach

arenthood is a journey forget that children learn by when you repeatedly ask them to where you play the role of a watching. Somehow, when you be polite while you are excessively P teacher and your children are frustrated and yelling at them rude with the people working are your students. As a parent, at the top of your lungs asking under you and you wonder what you are constantly worrying them to behave, you forget that has gone wrong! about the best education you you are not behaving yourself. can give to your children—be it When you cry out in exasperation You may not be aware of it, but in school or at home. You teach that your child has lied to you for you give your children much them how to walk and talk, what the umpteenth time, you forget more than verbal education. to say and what not to say, and that he or she has been watching Some of the qualities they see in what to do and what not to do. you lie to your neighbors or your you might become ingrained in However, somewhere during friends about why you could not them and manifest in different those lessons, parents at times go to that particular dinner. Or, ways when they grow up. They 1. Translation: Sahih international, Quran.com 28 see how you treat your spouse, Great is hatred in the sight of Allah friends, and neighbors—they see that you say what you do not do.” and they learn. They watch you (Quran 61: 2-3) If you want when you give that extra dollar to “ the poor man begging at the side Respected parents, you may mean your children of the road, they watch you when well, but while you teach your to have good you show respect to your parents, children the dos and don’ts of life, manners, you and they watch you when you do not teach them that it is okay to keep your word. All these happen say one thing and act differently. have to show while you are unaware and do For indeed, this is a hateful thing them ‘how’ by to Allah, The Most High. not mean to teach them; but they exhibiting it learn these anyway. If you want your children to have yourself. Many parents understand that good manners, you have to show what they are doing is wrong and them ‘how’ by exhibiting it yourself. do not want their children to follow If you want them to be truthful, do in their footsteps. Thus, they tend not let them catch you lying. If you them walk in your footsteps—the to impose on their children certain want them to keep their word, the footsteps that have been placed next time you promise them a day ” things that they themselves do for them out of Allah’s fear—the not do. However, this may result out or a chocolate bar—fulfill it. footsteps of taqwa (consciousness in your children having a dual If you do not want them to sit in of Allah). Your actions and personality; where they pretend front of the television for hours, interactions toward others will to be how you want them to be then do not keep the television teach them, by Allah’s will, the in your presence, while forgetting on for hours in your room. This lessons that you have been trying about it in your absence. It may way they will learn the importance to instill in them for so long. It is sound harsh, but this is the reality. of cohesion between words and you, who is responsible for their actions. upbringing, for developing their Allah says in the Quran, morale and character. You have Practice what you preach. Let your to lay the foundation on which “O you who have believed, why children learn from your actions, they will be built. Therefore, you do you say what you do not do? not only from instructions. Let have to be the person you want your children to be. The first step toward this is to practice what you preach, and this step you have to take today, now.

By Ferdousy Akhter Tani Sr. Ferdousy holds a B.A. in Pharmacy and an M.A. in Pharmaceutical Technology. She is currently pursuing a B.A. in Islamic studies (completed 7th semester). She is an educator in the Lakehead Grammar School, Bangladesh.

29 Islamic Online University Global Headquarters, Kanifing, The Gambia.

IOU Exam Centers

he Islamic Online University exam centers and proctors play an integral role in T fulfilling our mission of making high quality authentic Islamic and Islamized knowledge readily Azhariya center, Kumasi Ashanti Region, Ghana, Ghana Office, accessible to the world through the medium of Madina, Greater Accra Region, the Internet. As offline institutions, exam centers Ghana add the additional dimension of reliability and credibility to our graduate and undergraduate certification. For the administrative and examination purposes, the exam centers verify and confirm that those taking the IOU exams are in fact those who enrolled in the courses.

Students are required to attempt only the final exam at the center. Other exams are conducted online from the comfort of the student’s home. Existing IOU exam centers are spread across the globe and any student can establish a new IOU exam center located closer to his home as long as it fulfills the requirements. In 2013, IOU had 710 approved exam centers around the world and only Islamic Child Development two years later, in 2015, the number of centers Center, Ampang, Kuala Lumpur, increased to 1083, ma sha Allah. Hence, students Malaysia are adding new exam centers with each semester.

30 Victoria Garden city Central Mosque, Lekki, Lagos, Nigeria, Maa Shaa Allah Group of Schools, Ibadan, Oyo State, Nigeria

Salahudin Islamic Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Hikmah Institute, Bangalore, India.

IOU Exam Center Requirements:

The registered center should be either a mosque, Islamic community center, Islamic school/university, or professional Islamic institution. In rare cases, an office of a reputable Muslim business would also be considered if none of the mentioned are available.

Exam centers should be able to provide an Islamically reliable proctor with a working knowledge of the internet. He/she should be present in the room throughout the exam time (75 mins maximum per exam) and ensure that students do not cheat. Apart from supervising, a proctor also verifies the student ID’s and enters passwords provided by the IOU.

Though preferable, it is not necessary for a center to provide a Abu Huraira Center, Toronto, PC, laptop, or internet for the students. This can be brought in Ontario, Canada by the student him/herself.

By Veronika Matulova Sr. Veronika is the IOU Insights Managing Editor. She holds a B.A. in Islamic Studies from the IOU and is currently on the path of perfecting her Quranic recitation with Tajweed Made Easy Academy Global (TMEAG).

31 Common Misunderstandings

ll praise is due to Allah Alone. May reading secrets written and shared of a successful His Peace and Blessings be upon marriage, and above all the beautiful verses of the for a ﷺ A His Messenger and slave, Prophet Quran and guidelines set by the Prophet Muhammad, as well as his family and companions. prosperous lifetime relationship, I embarked on Allah said (interpretation of the meaning): writing about what makes it fail.

“And of His signs is that He created for you from For an outsider to any marital dispute, it can be yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in very confusing. There are so many thoughts and them, and He placed between you affection and questions in your mind, such as: mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who They just got married last year! give thought.” (Quran 30: 21) ● ● I remember at the time when they were getting The above-mentioned verse of the Quran married, they seemed to be so happy! implicates the framework for the basis and some of the objectives of marriage in Islam in general. ● They had such a big marriage banquet (waleemah) and everybody was saying that However, today we are only going to discuss some this was a marriage made in heaven! of the most common reasons why dissolution of marriage occurs. ● I can’t believe what has happened!

After pondering on all the ingredients, also ● And it carries on...

32 Before going any further I would like to share a One of them comes and says: “I did so and so.” And hadith, which illustrates the importance of marriage he says: “You have done nothing.” Then one amongst and the grave danger of breaking it. Jabir has them comes and says: “I did not spare so and so until said: ‘Iblis places I sowed the seed of discord between a husband and ﷺ reported that Allah’s Messenger his throne upon water; he then sends detachments a wife.” The Satan goes near him and says: “You have (for creating dissension); the nearer to him in rank are done well.” A’mash said: “He then embraces him.”’ those who are most notorious in creating dissension. (Saheeh Muslim: 6756)

After going through the statistics of various countries and cultures regarding the number of marriages and divorces and the courses of divorces, I feel it is only appropriate to share some of the information here. The World’s 10 Most Divorced Nations are as follows:

55% 9.France 60% 6. Luxembourg 61% 58% 53% 5. Spain 7. Estonia 10.USA 56% 66% 8. Cuba 4. Czech Republic 71% 1. Belgium 67% 3. Hungary 68% 2. Portugal

In Saudi Arabia, 8 divorces occur every hour, In Egypt, the economic factor has played 1 in spite of the general public enjoying a fairly 2 a major role in family feuds where up to 20 good financial status. To get married easily for divorces an hour take place. Huda Jadul Haqq, the first time and again after divorce, if one is able a researcher in women’s affairs and one of the to financially, may be a reason for this increase activists for them, says that the law of Khul’ (Islamic in divorce. Also, physical and mental abuse and term which means: the separation of the wife extreme jealousy have played a major role in in return for a payment; the husband takes the divorces. payment and lets his wife go, whether this payment

33 is the mahr (dowry paid by husband to wife) which ignore each other. Smartphones have just added he gave to her, or more or less than that) has made more supremacy to the already boiled dilemma. it easier for women to get their divorce. A woman Being independent financially and able to live in Egypt would pursue a divorce or settle for Khul’ prosperously after divorce just adds up. The for many reasons; though the most important practice of polygyny is also a known factor to all of one is the financial condition, apart from a the above. husband failing to meet the marriage obligations. The growing number of women who share the 5 In the war-torn country, Iraq, divorces in the financial responsibilities has become a reason also last 10 years have increased by 70% which as men tend to depend on this trend. Most of the is now at sixty thousand cases per year. It looks dissolutions happen in the first year of marriage. like there is a new culprit (at least seemingly) in the neighborhood. Turkish TV series, which 3 Surprisingly, in Tunisia where 1000 divorces portrays a rosy glamorous picture of couples and take place on a monthly basis, with a consequently leads to discontent in a matrimonial population of around 12 million, 40% of the life of Iraqis under extreme duress which they reason has been associated with sexual issues. are facing since the American invasion. Local Unemployment and harsh economic conditions research confirms that Facebook, internet, and play a vital role in almost all the divorces. smartphones are among the major reasons for divorces. Specifically that they end up interacting 4 When it comes to UAE, social media comes with others through these communications, as the first culprit for the divorces which in therefore creating jealousy and suspicions and the beginning of 2016 was at 4 divorces per day. then marital disputes.

Continuous social media From the above mentioned it is clear that interaction has become there can be many reasons. At a pandemic in many times it can be just one societies as this makes reason per couple the couple devoted to it and at times many and consequently reasons.

34 point to remember is that divorce doesn’t happen by accident. It builds up slowly when people overlook the A things that matter most. It isn’t a bubble that’s ready to burst. Though most people assume that a divorce is a shocker, something that comes right out of the blue when it is least expected. It may be true to family and friends, but to the couple involved, it’s something they would have seen all along or should have seen. We shouldn’t take our marriage as granted to last forever with no effort to make it possible.

The fact is that many people have put off marriage due to the increase in the number of divorces and complicated marital issues. Problems constantly build up over time, and at some point, the inevitable happens. Or one more accusation or error pushes the ball downhill and then, everything else comes crashing through the foundation of the marriage.

Apart from what has been already mentioned previously as a case study from certain countries, I am going to mention in general some of the most important factors in our modern day as being the reasons for dissolution of marriages.

● Not making the correct choice and it is mostly due to ignoring the advice of our when he said, as narrated ﷺ beloved Prophet by al-Bukhari (4802) and Muslim (1466) from :who said ﷺ Abu Hurayrah from the Prophet “A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty and her religious commitment. Seek the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper).”

● Non-compliance from the couple or one of them on the rights which Allah has mandated towards each other. For example, a husband may be negligent of his wife by not spending maybe she works outside which consumes on her, or his children, or by extensive traveling a lot of her time and it would naturally affect and being out of the house, and topping it her ability in the upbringing of her family and up by not showing any interest in her while shortfalls in her relationship with her husband. being with her. All of these may lead to mental Worst cases have been recorded where due depression and thus would lead towards the to her nature of work if she works in a mixed ultimate unwanted result. environment, she may shake hands with men and talk to them in a soft tone and in time ● On the other hand, the woman may be one one thing leads to another. As a result, she of those who always goes out of the house; would start to hate her husband as she would dividing her time between visiting others, compare him to those strangers she has been meetings, social gatherings, and functions. Or mixing with.

35 ● Indulging in sins. is too good for his/her partner, or thinking that he/she deserves a better spouse. ● Taking the word of divorce (talaq) as a joke and using it as they please. ● Lack of communication. Communication isn’t just about talking to each other. ● Drug or alcohol addictions. To know and Communication is about understanding understand the critical role this plays in each other clearly and learning more about many misunderstandings and divorces, and each other. it is growing by the day, we need to know that the drug industry turnover is estimated ● Unrealistic expectations from each at around $400 billion per annum, global other. alcoholic drinks industry over 1 trillion dollars, and cigarettes about USD 1.31 ● A difference in cultural backgrounds if billion. Only the Islamic law can take care not handled wisely leads to the undesirable. of this perfectly. There are so many cases ● Not understanding the needs or wants which I have personally handled that were of the spouse. related to the above and mostly the females suffer immensely as a result. ● A sudden change in lifestyle for better or worse.

● Trust. We should learn to trust each other, and we should avoid what may cause suspicion.

● Jealousy if it gets out of its acceptable proportion.

● Insecurity. ● Incompatible personalities. ● Abusive or over controlling relationships. ● Physical and/or mental abuse. ● Changes in priorities. ● Cheating and infidelity. ● A difference in sexual interests. ● Family members, especially mother in law. In many cases, if the spouses were ● Loosing interest in one’s spouse. A left to their own, things would never have person is no longer attracted to his/her escalated to a divorce. spouse.

● Repeated comparison of one’s partner ● Independence. with another man or woman. ● Arrogance. ● The head of the house not contributing towards the family income. ● Not willing to accept the guilt. ● ● Constant humiliation before others. Families and friends. ● ● One spouse thinks that he/she is too The so-called advisors. good for the other. One feeling like he/she ● Cheating.

36 Tongue.

I have handled too many cases where not knowing how to utilize the tongue has been the main factor in any misunderstanding. I have found this to be one of the most important factors which many may not consider something important. My brothers and sisters, remember that it is with a tongue that the husband said, “Yes, I accept her as my wife” or that, “I want to get married to her,” and in the end, one may do the total opposite by saying, “I divorce her” as the ultimate unwelcome result. This is where I want to remind myself and everyone with a few of the quotes from Al-Bukhari and Muslim narrated from Abu .ﷺ the sayings of the Prophet said: “Whoever believes in Allah ﷺ Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allah and the Last Day, let him speak good or else keep silent…”

Allah says in the interpretation of the meaning: “Not a word does he (or she) utter but there is a watcher by him ready (to record it).” (Quran 50: 18)

commanded us to control our tongues in more than one ﷺ The Prophet hadeeth, such as that narrated by al-Tirmidhi from ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Amir who said: “I said, ‘O Messenger of Allah, what is salvation?’ He said, “Control your tongue, keep to your house, and weep over your sin.” (Classed as sahih (authentic) by al-Albani)

Once we learn the art of speaking, many issues, Allah willing, can be solved before they get out of control. I pray that Allah gives us ease in maintaining our relationship with our spouses and enables us to be the best for our families. Ameen.

By Professor Mohammad Anwar Sahib Sheikh Anwar is the Head of the Department of Islamic Studies at IOU. He is also a founder, member and Chairman of At-Taqwa Trust, Auckland, New Zealand, Secretary for the Ulama Board of New Zealand, and advisor for halal issues to the NZ government.

37 Part I

38 Gratitude and Productivity he opens her wardrobe. Two As we grow, we tend to be unthankful and overlook dozen dresses of red, yellow, the blessings in our life. We focus all our energy and S orange, pink, and you-name- attention toward finding out what is lacking in our it colors are hanging in there. After lives. This is really ironic because the more we focus on a cursory glance, she bangs the scarcity, the more we tend to attract it. Being unthankful door shut. “Mom, I have ‘nothing’ to Allah adversely affects our productivity as the mind, to wear for the party. I have been which is in a negative state can hardly contemplate the begging you to take me shopping productivity in life. for ages. You never listen to me. What do I do now?” Western Research vs. 1400-year He is rummaging through the fridge for the fourth time. Pizza, Old Message chocolate, ice cream, fruits, and Research has proven that through our thoughts and juices are stuffed inside. He leaves emotions, we emit powerful signals, which have the the kitchen despondently. “There’s ability to attract signals of the same frequency. In other really nothing much to eat in here. words, our positive signals will attract all the positive Let’s go to the café and have some signals and the same is true for negative signals. decent food today.” Whenever we are being ungrateful, we are actually in the negative state of mind and allowing the self- She wakes up with the same defeating thoughts to emit all sorts of negative energy feelings of depression and dread. from us. (“I never seem to have enough money.” Or “I Thoughts of suicide are again can never be healthy.” Or “I can never find a practicing floating in her mind. She is married husband.”) This will lead us to attract more negative to a handsome man, with two energy. Ultimately, we will end up becoming a black lovely kids, a home, and a car— hole of despair. All the worries, arguments, and everything most women would ask frustration lead to more of the same. for. Apparently, life is perfect but there is “something” missing. It is Considering all this, if we want to attract more signals just because she is not married to of what we desire to experience, for example, peace, the man of her dreams. joy, harmony, ease, prosperity, then why not choose our thoughts consciously and carefully? He thinks that his life ‘sucks.’ He is seventeen years old. He has Today, non-Muslim researchers have discovered these an iPhone, Core i7 Dell, 1000 secrets in the name of natural laws; while these “open bucks monthly pocket money secrets” were given to us in the Quran 1400 years ago. but according to him, his life is a Psychologists and philosophers have painstakingly disaster. He cannot focus on his conducted researches and have come up with new textbook. He slams it shut and theories and ideas. All these “newly discovered” secrets starts pacing in the room as he were presented to us in the Quran in no uncertain terms. thinks out aloud. “If my friend Allah promises that He will give you more if you are can own a Jaguar, why can’t I? grateful (Quran 14:7). Everything sucks.” Robert A. Emmons from the University of California, and Do any of these scenarios Davis and Michael E. McCullough from the University of sound familiar? Miami conducted a long-term research project designed

39 to study the effects of gratitude. Here are some of their findings:

1. In an experimental comparison, those who kept gratitude journals on a weekly basis exercised more regularly, reported fewer physical symptoms, felt better about their lives as a whole, and were more optimistic about the upcoming week compared to those who recorded hassles or neutral life events. Surah al-Fatiha: 2. Participants who kept gratitude lists were more likely to have made A Pillar’s progress toward important personal goals over a two-month period compared to subjects in the other Pillar experimental conditions. It is well-known that prayer—the important pillar of Islam—is incomplete without surah al-Fatihah, which 3. Grateful people report higher levels begins with expressing our gratitude to our Lord for of positive emotions, life satisfaction, the countless blessings He has showered upon us. vitality, optimism and lower levels of Have you ever noticed that a lot of du’as taught by depression and stress. the Prophet also start with the same expression ﷺ of gratitude—Alhamdulillah? The day starts with the This is a ready-made formula for supplication, “All praise and thanks be to the One Who attracting more of what you want in life. gave us life.”

Why is gratitude such a key ingredient What is the significance of this? Allah wants you to in a successful life? Does it make sense start your day in a supercharged state, attracting now? Gratitude basically helps us make ample happiness and abundance in life. the shift. Consequently, we are able to attract more good, love, joy, money, The meal ends with the supplication, “All praise and health, and blissful relationships in thanks be to the One Who gave us food and drink.” Why? our life. Gratitude is one of the easiest Because He always wants you to have better food every and most frequently used methods to time you eat. All praise and thanks belong to Allah. alter the signals one is emitting. What we need to master is the attitude of gratitude—the attitude of appreciating everything in life. End of part I

By Bela Khan

Sr. Bela is an author and speaker. She is serving as an Assistant Professor of Psychology at the IOU. She helps women come out of their misery and become better versions of themselves. She can be reached at www.belakhan.com

40 THE RIGHT Beginning

was own aqeedah is correct and put Hence, working in the light of ﷺ he Prophet reported by Abu this aqeedah into practice. For the religion and ahadith, parents T Hurayrah to have example, Muslims know that can ensure a befitting, fulfilling, promised Paradise for the child Allah is Ar-Razzaaq, the Provider; and successful childhood, rich raised as a righteous Muslim, therefore, they should seek their with values and understanding saying: provisions through halal sources of the deen and dunya. and leave the outcome to Allah. “Seven will be shaded by Allah in The way to ensure a child’s future The rights of children: His shade on a day when there in both this world and the next is will be no shade besides His to have taqwa. a. Breastfeeding, physical shade; a just ruler and a youth contact, love, mercy who grows up worshipping A very common misconception Allah...”1 is that parents can get away b. Strong character formation with telling children to do and future personality Parents should desire for things that they themselves do themselves and their children c. Love and guide as much as Paradise, as Allah said: not do. If a mother is gentle, possible (physical affection) the children will be gentle. If “And for those who believe and children see the mother exert d. Quality time and personal whose offspring follow them in herself to worship Allah, they attention: playing with them, faith, I will join their offspring will want to emulate her. If talking to them and much more with them, and I will not decrease parents are not affectionate, 2 e. Gentleness — Prophet their rewards in any way.” kind, compassionate, merciful, said, “Gentleness ﷺ Muhammad the children also follow suit. But when should the Islamic is not found in anything except upbringing begin? Education Parents should try to make their that it beautifies it, nor is it starts before the child is born characters as upright as possible removed from anything except and continues from the time because the child will learn from that it...”3 of birth. Parents desiring to their example. Parents should raise righteous children should want their children to know themselves be righteous. They the real Islam and want to be must work on themselves, their the strongest influence in their By Aishah Ahmed relationship with Allah, their children’s lives. This is amongst Sr. Aishah is a postgraduate chemist knowledge, and their character. the strongest methods Prophet pursuing her B.A. in Islamic Studies at used in raising IOU where she serves as an IOU CIH ﷺ It is the responsibility of the Muhammad Officer. Sr. Aishah is actively involved in parents to ensure that their the generation of the sahabah. various volunteer projects at IOU.

1. Sahih al Bukhari. 2. Surah at-Toor, 52: 21. 3. Sunan Abi Dawud 41 Her Beginning Hafsa bint Sirin was a distinguished faqiha (Islamic jurist), qaar’iah (reciter of the Quran) and muhaddithah (narrator of Hadith). Her outstanding achievements in all three fields render her as a Hafsa notable scholar of her time. She was the daughter of Sirin, the freed slave of Anas ibn Malik and the sister of the renowned scholar, Muhammad ibn Sirin. Her Bint mother, Safiyyah, was also the freed slave of Abu Bakr. Due to the fact that her parents were in the vicinity of great Sahaba, the upbringing of Hafsa and her siblings was firmly rooted in Islamic knowledge. Hafsa and her sister were known to have memorized Sirin the Quran at a young age, Kareemah at the age of nine and Hafsa at twelve. This was the beginning to a milestone of achievements. Her Religious Devotion Hafsa was known to be a devout worshipper and an avid seeker of knowledge.

Mahdi ibn Maymoon said, “Hafsa bint Sirin stayed thirty years without leaving her prayer place, unless for sleep or to answer the call of nature.” (Siyar A’laam an-Nubalaa’)

She spent her time in the remembrance of Allah, reciting half of the Quran daily and regularly fasting.

Abdul Kareem ibn Muawiyah said: “It was mentioned to me regarding Hafsa that she would read half of the Quran every night and would fast during the day and break her fast (i.e. wouldn’t fast) the two Eids and

42 the days of Tashreeq (the three days after the day of and her name can be found in all six books of sacrifice, i.e. following the 10th of Dhul Hijjah).” (Sifah hadiths. Furthermore, her knowledge and wisdom As-Safwah, Dhikr Al Mustafiyaat min A’abidaat al were considered unparalleled by some great male Basrah, Vol 2, Page 709) scholars.

Hafsa Surpasses Male Scholars Iyaas ibn Mu’awiyyah said: “I did not meet anyone The superiority of Hafsa’s knowledge and her whom I can prefer over Hafsa.’ He was asked: ‘What proficiency in the various recitations of the Quran about Hasan al Basri and Muhammad ibn Sirin (her is greatly highlighted in the books of history, where brother)?’ He said: ‘As for me, I do not prefer anyone even her brother, Ibn Sirin, would refer to her when over her. She learnt the Quran by heart when she was facing challenges with a particular qira’ah. twelve years old.” (Al Mizzi, Tahdheeb al-Kamaal, xxxv. 152.) Hisham narrates that when her brother would find something difficult and ambiguous regarding Hisham ibn Hassan said: “I saw Al-Hasan (Hasan the qira’ah (recitation), he would say, “Go and ask al Basri), and (Muhammad) ibn Sirin, and I did not Hafsah how to recite.” (Sifah As-Safwah, Dhikr Al see anyone whom I thought was clever than Hafsa.” Mustafiyaat min ‘Aabidaat al Basrah.) (Sifah As-Safwah, Dhikr Al Mustafiyaat min A’abidaat Hafsa narrated many hadiths from Anas ibn Malik al Basrah, Vol 2, Page 709.)

Her Advice to the Youth (Sifah As-Safwah, Dhikr Al Mustafiyaat min ‘Aabidaat al Basrah) Hafsa (may Allah be pleased with her) devoted herself to the seeking of Hafsa bint Sirin died in 101 AH at the age knowledge and attaining the pleasure of of ninety. Her commendable character her Creator from a young age, knowing is one that is truly inspirational. It is her that the rewards to be reaped from such aptitude, dedication and devotion to an investment are incomparable. her Creator that distinguishes her as an eminent personality in our rich Islamic She said, “O youth (Ya Ma’shar history. Her scholarly achievements ash-Shabaab)! Take from portray the potential of women and their yourselves while you are young, excellence in the transmission of Islamic for certainly I do not see knowledge and the matters pertaining (real) action except in youth.” to it. May Allah be pleased with her and may He grant us the opportunity to follow in her footsteps, Ameen.

By Ibtihal Al Khalifin

Sr. Ibtihal is currently majoring in Islamic economics at IOU with the intention of spreading awareness about Islamic Shariah law in this field, in sha Allah. She is a passionate writer of Islamic articles.

References: https://ar.wikipedia.org/wiki/%D8%AD%D9%81%D8%B5%D8%A9_%D8%A8%D9%86%D8%AA_%D8%B3%D9%8A%D8%B1%D9%8A%D9%86 http://idealmuslimah.com/personalities/womenscholars/998-hafsah-bint-seereen-part-3.html http://thesalafifeminist.blogspot.com/2014/06/a-lioness-amongst-scholars.html 43 An Introduction to CLIENT- CENTERED Therapy

Client-centered therapy (CCT) is a type of counseling that was developed in the West by Carl Rogers in the 1940’s. CCT is centered around the concept of creating a space where clients can express their feelings in an environment nurtured by three main core conditions exhibited by the counselor, aiming toward a goal of self-actualization.

44 The three main core conditions are:

Empathy. 1 A counselor goes beyond having sympathy for a client by evaluating the situation and feeling it from the client’s point of view. This requires sensitivity and emotional understanding of the client’s feelings.

Unconditional positive regard. 2 Clients are encouraged and allowed to express their full range of emotions without fear of judgment. A counselor is willing to listen to a client without interrupting or judging.

Congruence. 3 Clients enter therapy in a state of incongruence where the difference between who they actually are and who they want to be are far apart. According to CCT, this is the cause of psychological distress. In CCT, the aim is to work to reduce the difference between the actual and ideal self, promoting a congruence between behavior and feelings, and thereby reducing psychological difficulties and distress. A counselor does this by expressing openness to hear all that a client wants to share and expressing the genuineness of their desire to assist the client.

45 The goal of CCT is self- name a few. As we see the stigma than directed by, the professional; actualisation. around mental health problems in therefore empowering the service- the Ummah reduce, we have seen user and increasing the chances A successful therapy will result in an increase in interest in the field, of adherence and consequent a self-actualised individual, with both in terms of training to become success. increased confidence in his or qualified counselors and in coming her own sense of self-meaning forward to seek counseling for This all sounds quite familiar, right? and growth in feelings of self- psychological difficulties. Let us take things back to our worth. Furthermore, a client will own Islamic history. This method be inspired to achieve to the best of counseling and the aspects of their potential, and motivated involved in the core conditions are to trust their own thoughts and all methods that were used by our ﷺ feelings. beloved Prophet Muhammad in dealing with his Ummah. The In CCT, the focus is on the concept of CCT actually goes back therapeutic relationship and even further in Islamic history than process as the client learns how the 1940’s when it was discovered to manage and solve their own in the West. Therapeutic problems within the space they techniques used in CCT are not ﷺ are given in therapy. Rather than new to Muslims. Our Prophet directing the client as to how to used these very counseling skills respond to their situation as some Today, we see CCT being over 1400 years ago in developing therapeutic approaches do, CCT developed to be used with wider warm and friendly relationships takes a non-directive approach populations— groups, families, and with his followers. Join us next and puts the client in control. This couples too. The main concepts of time to discuss the lessons in empowers the clients to change for CCT are also being integrated into counseling from our Prophet to themselves through the promotion other styles of counseling such as see how concepts of CCT were of self-awareness and self-esteem cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). already being used in Islam before in a caring environment. CCT is Regardless of a specific counseling it was formally recognized as a client-led, where the client can style, most counselors borrow from therapeutic modality in the West. be comfortable and confident to the concept of CCT in focusing choose the direction of therapy on the importance of the client- facilitated by the counselor, as therapist relationship in order End of part I they adhere to the core conditions to increase therapeutic progress to provide the environment that and success. Furthermore, we allows this to comfortably take also see institutions like health The Islamic Online University place. CCT has been used to care and education borrowing offers online counseling successfully treat a large number from the concepts of CCT in the compatible with Islamic of mental health problems, such delivery of patient-centered care principles led by the standards as depression, anxiety, stress, post- and student-centered learning. In of CCT. islamiconlineuniversity. traumatic stress disorder, anger such cases, the student, patient, com/counseling/counsel.php management, social problems, or client are the ones directing addictions, and psychosis to the services facilitated by, rather

By Hannah Morris

Sr. Hannah is a teacher and instructor of IOU’s B.Sc. Psychology course. She also works as a counselor for IOU’s Islamic Counseling Services: islamiconlineuniversity.com/counseling/counsel.php.

46 “Imam Abu Hanifa was not a Hanafi. Imam al-Shafi’i was not a Shafi’i. Imam Malik was not a Maliki. Imam Ahmad bin Hanbal was not a Hanbali. They all ”. ﷺ followed Prophet Muhammad —Dr. Bilal Philips

“ 47 ‘Accepting Islam earned me a slap from my father and torture’

Christianity is moved by their low standard preach the Friday service. I was not a religion, but of living, and I realized that I faced with a dilemma because I was actually living a luxurious had just accepted Islam and to a business. life through the money I gained preach that Jesus is God or the Modern Christianity is money- from them—this also added to son of God did not seem right. oriented. In the church today, the reasons why I knew that Nevertheless, I succumbed and we have blessings, holy oil, making a change by embracing performed the sermon. holy water, holy salt, holy Islam was the right move. handkerchief, and holy bath Usually, my father’s church for sale. Pastors and church On February 26, 2016, I finally organized many activities on leaders generate thousands of decided to accept Islam. I drove Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays. dollars from the sale of these to a mosque not too far away Being a pastor, I was confused items plus the offerings and from my home and said the on what to do! “Should I inform the tax. As a pastor, I was living shahadah. I was elated and the my parents or should I hide my a luxurious life, while regular whole atmosphere was joyous. Islam and continue preaching members of my church were When I returned home that Friday Christianity.” My dilemma living a subsistence life. I was afternoon, my father asked me to persisted…

48 I consulted the Imam, who On March 5, 2016, my father fornication is prevalent amongst helped me take my shahadah. sparked the discussion during a many Christians; about 95% He told me that I could not be in family dinner, ‘’These days your of Christians were born out of both religions; therefore, I needed behavior has changed toward wedlock and the evilest acts (drug to stop the church activities. I Christianity—you are not active usage, homosexuality, abortions) explained that doing so would during church services like before.” today were more prominent in lead to my expulsion from the I was silent for some time; then nations where Christians are the house. Upon hearing that, the he posed a question, “Is it true majority.” I further went on to Imam told me to continue with that you have some link with Islam say that Christianity was heavily the church services without now?” based on collecting money from people fraudulently. My father, believing in Christianity while he I replied, “Yes.” looked for a solution. Due to my within a short period has become father’s status, Muslims being a He asked, “What is that link?” one of the richest pastors in our minority in that area, and my fear Again, I was quiet. He then asked country whilst the majority of of religious violence, there was me, “Are you in a relationship with the congregation were living a none to host or support me. a Muslim female or do you have a substandard life. Muslim friend?” My mother told me, “Son, I expect I managed for a week; attending I replied, “No.” you to know better; we sent you church services and attending to Bible Seminary to know the salah (prayer) whenever I was He asked me, “Then what is the scriptures. Do you not know that able to escape. It was difficult problem?” we are living under a grace and to reveal my reversion to Islam not law?” because I was living with my I broke down and told him that parents and the entire family I was now a Muslim and that I I remained quiet until they left. including me was dependent on had accepted Islam a week ago. I immediately received a slap The following day, the church the money generated from the leader and some pastors called church services. As a result, I had from him. Before this, I cannot remember the last time he hit me. me. They tried to convince me to attend the church activities. about Christianity and dissuade I hardly had the opportunity to The whole family was upset me about Islam. I told them pray at the mosque, so I mostly with me. They all left leaving me if they wanted to help me, prayed in my room. Being new alone. I began to question myself, they should talk to my father to Islam, the only type of prayer wondering if this was the right and convince him to give me I knew were the two rakah of decision. I wondered if it was the freedom to practice Islam. Within prayer I did on Friday (Jumu’ah) path that will take me to Paradise. two days, I received calls from the day I had accepted Islam. I contemplated until finally, I fell Australia, America, and some asleep. After midnight, my mother parts of Europe encouraging me There is a radio station in and sister woke me up and wanted to change my decision. They even Monrovia, Liberia, that would to know the reason for making promised to take me with them play the prayer at each prayer such a decision. I told them that if I changed my decision. I told time, so I would follow it based I saw the truth in Islam and that them that those places were not on the one I did on Friday, the it was the way to Paradise. I tried Paradise. day of my conversion. As a result, to convince them that Christianity When all attempts to convince I would finish before they finish. had no solution to the problems me to leave Islam were rendered However, as destined, some of of the world. They asked me, why? I said, “High rate of divorce, futile, my father resorted to my father’s church members violence. He seized my car key, saw me visiting the mosque and high rate of alcohol consumption, non-marital relationships— mobile phone, and laptop; he informed my father. also told the guards not to allow

49 me out of the compound or else he retained my passport and of a school and found one at they would lose their jobs. My some documents; perhaps he Sukuta with a yearly tuition. maternal uncle, the Chief of staff was not completely convinced. Unfortunately, the Munazzamat for the Armed Forces of Liberia He asked me to conduct the could not afford it so they gave (AFL), came for me around church service the coming me some pocket money instead. midnight and I was taken to Sunday, which I did vibrantly—I a military base outside of the do not think that I have ever I later contacted my cousin who capital. I spent four days at the conducted a church service with was residing in The Gambia base. During these days, I was that amount of energy. (a Christian) to help me. She tortured to reveal the identity wanted to know why I was in the of the Imam who conducted my The following Monday, I secretly Gambia and I explained my story. shahadah ceremony and the visited my Imam to discuss my She took me to her neighbor Muslims that I have connections plan to leave Liberia—where to who was a Muslim and a teacher with. Amongst the officers who go and how to learn about Islam. to learn about Islam. He was were torturing me was a Muslim; He recommended The Gambia happy and accepted me. After a he was not happy but he could week, I moved to his compound. not help. After he knew the Later I found out that my cousin reason why I was being tortured, called my father and reported he would visit secretly and bring me. Within that week, my father called a Christian organization me food. He advised me to deny As a pastor, I was Islam outwardly while accepting “ in The Gambia, Winners Chapel, living a luxurious it in my heart in order for me to return me back. The pastor, to be released so that I could life, while regular with some officials of his church escape and practice Islam. He members of my and my cousin, went to meet my told me that in my case, there church were living cousin’s neighbor. During their was none who could help me a subsistence life. discussion, my father called and out except God because my spoke to him and encouraged father had a high status; he had him to help in returning me the Vice President of Liberia and home. Unfortunately, he some members of the House of succumbed to my father and Parliament as members of his counseled me to leave. church, and to top that my uncle and to look ”for the Munazzamat I was left in a state of confusion. was the Chief of staff of the AFL. Organization when I got there. After our discussion, the Imam There was none to help me. I was allowed to make a phone and I went to the Ministry of call; I called the Imam I knew Foreign Affairs to get a new I went to a friend of mine and and informed him about my passport. Two days later, I left explained my situation to him. condition and the advice of the Liberia, moved across to Guinea He condemned the idea of brother. The Imam embraced the Conakry and then headed for returning to Liberia. He took me advice and told me to go ahead. The Gambia by road. I arrived at to his teacher at Madinara, Br. The plan worked and the officers night and spent the night in one Ahmed. He hosted me and gave called my father and told him mosque. After the Fajr prayer, I me a room in his compound. I that I changed my decision and enquired about the Munazzamat joined his class and began to was now a Christian again. He and was fortunate to meet the study the “huroof.” One month was very happy about it and he director. After explaining my later, Br. Ahmed took me to came immediately and took me story, he called their education The Gambia Supreme Islamic home. He then returned all that director and asked him to search Council and I was introduced he seized from me and gave me for a Quranic memorization to the Secretary who made the liberty I once had. However, school for me. We left in search copies of all my documents and

50 recommended the Islamic Online was also mine and that I should mosque helped me by providing University (IOU). Before accepting stop by for breakfast, lunch, and me with clothes, money, and a the recommendation, I made it dinner every day. laptop for my studies at IOU. clear that I was a foreigner and did not have any money. He said When I returned to Sukuta, I On July 1, 2016, I was informed that I should start anyway; he received calls from two of my that my father was in The Gambia will contact my teacher and give aunts, persuading me to return and that he was searching for him money for my transportation to Liberia and Christianity, luring me. I had a discussion with every month. Thus, I began my me with a promise to take me my teacher, imam, and some journey with IOU. to America and Australia. The brothers present; we decided words of my Liberian brother that we would meet my father However, the situation was not echoed in my mind, “Allah will and enquire the reason behind as easy and I had to return to my test you.” I was confused and did forcing me back to Liberia. My previous teacher, my cousin’s not know what to do. father promised to meet us on neighbor, who was very happy July 4. The meeting was set. to see me return. Initially, I The following day, I recounted Nevertheless, Allah had other thought that everything was fine; the events to the brother. He plans. I had the opportunity to however, I soon realized that my meet Dr. Bilal Philips, the Founder father was still pressurizing them and Chancellor of IOU. He to return me to Liberia. advised me not to meet my father because meeting him would be After about a week, I was invited The words of my futile at this point. He also told by the librarian at IOU for me that it could affect my studies Jumu’ah prayer. Thereafter, I “ Liberian brother and more importantly, my Islam met the Imam and other Muslim echoed in my itself. Therefore, I agreed not to brothers and explained my state mind, “Allah will meet my father. Later I found out of affairs. The Imam told me that test you.” that my father returned to Liberia there was a Liberian brother on Wednesday, July 6—two days (also a teacher) who prayed at after our proposed meeting. the mosque. I was told to come the following day to meet him. Until this day, I am still in a On Saturday, I met the Liberian advised me to come over and difficult situation with my family. brother at his home, which stay with him,” which I accepted. My father only spoke to me once was only about a five-minute However, when I returned for since he left The Gambia; he is still walk from the IOU Campus at my clothes, my cousin and his very angry with me and threatens Kanifing. After telling him my neighbor restricted me from me. My mother and sister call me story, he told me, “My brother, it going. Eventually, I managed to quite often. They are not angry is Allah who called you to Islam, escape and reached the Liberian with me but they still feel that I Allah will test you and after brother’s home empty handed. should leave Islam and go back your test, Allah will help you.” He told me that Allah will to Christianity. May Allah guide He added that his compound provide. Some brothers at the them to seek the straight path.

By Sethon B. Kerbay

Br. Sethon holds a B.Sc. in Theology. He served as a pastor in Liberia until his conversion to Islam in 2016. He is currently studying Islam at IOU while learning the Quran.

51 IOU’s second online mental health conference is packed with interesting hot topics that affect our everyday lives. The IOU has put together an amazing team of scholars, life-coaches, and professionals to make this a one of a kind breathtaking online experience, which, in sha Allah, will have a positive impact on your lives.