K Kodwo Eshun Knightrider issue11 Kults Kenny JULY/AUGUST Kooking Kristians Kourgettes plus all your favourite krusty regulars edi… …orial is. Of course, they conflate the whiter-than-white, mediocrity thirty-something success of shoutie rappers—the and props Beastie Boys—with the underground. edited by About a month ago I went to what was supposed Sydney hip hop is more accurately represented by to be the grand finalé of the Urban Xpressions the collective output of Blaze & Phibes’ Parallax View dale and yellow peril festival. Blackalicious were appearing ‘live’ (if you label and Elefant Traks—two labels that get more airplay from non-hip hop radio shows than by the real designed by can count one MC rhyming over some under- dale produced dubplates accompanied by a backing hip hop shows. In Elefant Traks’ case they don’t even get respect from the real hip hop underground—no vocalist live). And all around The Metro everyone cyclic website doubt because they don’t have the street credentials was giving each other massive props. Most of all flux & richard to the sponsors of the event, without whom and smalltown paranoia of those keepin’ it real. Also, Sydney hip hop wouldn’t be where it was today. Parallax view and Elefant Traks are labels that get little assistance from any industry—music or fashion. written by Excuse me while I vomit. yellow peril Financed by record companies and jeans manu- Anyway, we’re here at issue 11 of Cyclic Defrost and dale facturers trying to capture lost markets, Sydney we don’t have to rely on adverts to stay alive, which flux hip hop, as it was portrayed that night, seemed is good because if we did we’d be fucked. wasabi like a small bunch of inward-looking naïve fools. In this issue there are all the reviews that should degrassi Boxed in by stylistic demands to keep it real and have been in last month’s issue, plus lineups right up the collective inability to represent the diverse until early August including our 3rd birthday special copying, folding, geography of this city, Sydney hip hop barely on August 1st and several international guests. stapling and stuffing registers as more than a corporate blip on the the cryo crew with the long surface of the youth market. The real money Also, by the time Cyclic #12 is out, two more in our suffering monkeyboy at the series of limited edition 3 CDs will have been lies, apparently, in the R&B market, with its helm size matters… designer sportswear fetishes and multicultural released, so keep an eye on the discography section conspicuous consumption. The big joke is that by at www.snarl.org to stay informed. thanks to Limited edition 3” cds are here. Released every month and only financing an underground hip hop scene, the big available through the Snarl Heavy Industries website Yellow Peril Ozi Battla for keeping it real (www.snarl.org) or from Frigid itself. Each $10 gets split amongst companies think Sydney hip hop is bigger than it even in his absence, dave for the artists and goes back into pumping out the next one. Hand made packaging (and hand made recording), each individually numbered. the handshake and words of Collect the whole set… encouragement, r & s, kerrii This issue of Cyclic Defrost If you move, or want to frost brought to you by the fact contribute, comment or for folding covers so wonder- frozen blueberries out soon that Sydney council are fully, seb for putting up with advertise, please contact employing people to stand in rambling conversations at 2am free Sydney because of the the editors: and to matty mat mat for film giveaway: GO supposed danger of falling 1 rubble, and yet we can have hanging on. It’s about time we had another giveaway, the streets blocked off to [email protected] DDL this time courtesy of the Verona. Inside this welcome home 15 sledging or Advertising issue you’ll find a pass to a preview on bigots (with at least two inquiries can be directed to Tooth Wednesday, July 14, 1999. Below is a bit cheats) for winning a sporting [email protected] Jonny Phive of a blurb about the fillum… competition. Nostradamus the editors (see below) or to predicted the end of the jordan spence at uBin From the director of Swingers, Doug Liman, world…I predict the end of or, if you must Go is a smart and hilarious black comedy taste and dignity come [email protected] Sub Bass Snarl, which takes a fresh look at lives spent september 2000. WEBSITE getting cashed up, getting evicted, getting PO Box A2073 2 on it, getting out and getting going, starring FUCK THE OLYMPICS Snarl Heavy Industries vtek Sarah Polley, Katie Holmes, Scott Wolf, Jay cover: Sydney South, 1235 www.snarl.org. Lookout for the new Mohr, Desmond Askew, Timothy Olyphant, is that an Argentinian Bible cyclic defrost website up soon overcast Taye Diggs, Breckin Meyer and Nathan study pamphlet or an ad for (probably this issue given any luck) tele cafe? Look out for the lookout for questionnaire/ courtesy of the two richards. No more spinwarp Bexton. special anniversary edition next month… subscription forms next issue downloading hefty PDFs (although brothelowner Go releases nationally on August 19, 1999. they’ll still be available...) be on your must-see list… oh my god, they http://www.capalert.com/capreports/southpar little blocks of sweetness k.htm ICY crucified kenny… And check this plot summary— “Satan is portrayed as the homosexual lover of …you christians Saddam Hussein and is portrayed as a sensitive, loving and caring being. Hussein waves his POLES disembodied male member around. And it was SOUTH PARK—THE MOVIE not a cardboard drawing like most other images of the movie — it was of photographic “Morality and God are completely vilified and dismissed resolution. The most foul of the foul words was in SOUTH PARK. Evil is extolled. The movie takes literally clearly spoken *by the children* at least 131 Marxist Professor Herbert Marcuse’s statement that times and many other times in a muffled or language is a weapon of the revolution, and the goal of garbled way. The three/four letter word culture vocabulary was used at least 119 times. God’s the revolution is to tear down any semblance of morality, i.e., Christianity and the Bible. As Marx said, name in vain was used 11 times without the four or prostitutes are better than wives (whom he ridicules), letter expletive and 6 times with it. And many ? families are bad and religion is the opiate of the people. times the child characters were saying things The phrase “the truth is stranger SOUTH PARK captures all of Marx’s lame-brained, like “What’s the big deal” (about the foul than fiction” applies no stronger cult language). “Suck my —”, “Let’s ([homosexual by Flux immoral ideas on one piece of celluloid. Boycotting this than to the Aum Supreme Truth movie might give it more of an audience, but the intercourse)”, and repeated questions about a (Aum Shrinrikyo). The cult believed by sixteen days followed by riots and rational thing to do is to stay away from any theater female private organ were but a very few of the responsible for the Sarin gas attack accusations that they had stolen sixteen playing it. Regrettably, curious children will see it and be vulgar expressions used by the kids. in Japanese subways four years days of people lives. After all it’s 2000 AD corrupted. The future of our society looks very dim after ago are in the midst of a in the Christian calender. Angels were portrayed as females—nude, very thinking what those children will do and how they will resurgence. Their Phoenix-like rise nude. God was called many vulgar and hateful Unbeknownst to many, George Lucas col- behave after this powerful entertainment virus corrupts from the ashes has been made names. Satan was glorified. Jesus was equated laborated with Joseph Campbell (a their hearts and minds.” with sexual anatomy. A child was graphically possible through discount computer Theologian) for the development of the sales. Approaching what they Yep, its not often that Cyclic would mention a incinerated by igniting his anal wind, then Star Wars screenplay, drawing on the another kid tried to beat out the flames with a believe to be a big event (sometime mythology of many cultures. Lucas has mainstream Hollywood release, but after being directed around October this year) they are to read a web review of the film by the American stick and was concerned about the stick consistently been at the forefront of the catching fire. Body parts dripping with blood one of many modern cults (such as -evangelist movement ever since his Fundamentalist Christian Childcare Action Project, I Scientology, the Raeliens, and can’t resist. Here’s the review reprinted direct from the were ripped from a child by a surgeon who dystopian film THX1138 which explored expressed shallow concern. The dead child was Heaven’s Gate) that take their lead social control through interactive media. website. Make up your own mind whether this film must from . Based on then seen with an exploded chest. The dead His THX sound systems, Industrial Light child, after being rejected from Heaven (by nude Isaac Asimov’s Foundation trilogy and Magic, and Lucas Arts computer they believe they will form a holy, female angels) and cast into Hell, was then games were joined in the mid 80’s by his presented as a ghost trying to influence the pure group of technicians that will development of a graphical multi-user rebuild civilization after the other kids. An all-male chorus line wore pink virtual environment called Habitat (which bikini briefs. Homosexual acts were described. impending apocalypse. They are ran on Commodore 64’s!). reported to have misinterpreted Decomposing burned bodies were cast as live religious traditions, practiced rape, Interactive media has altered the meaning occupants of Hell. “Big brother” electronic shock torture and murder, and developed of the word Avatar (which came from the control of a child was used to prevent his use of laser, chemical, biological and Hindu for a god’s earthly presence in foul language (each time he cussed he was nuclear weapons (I kid you not). bodily form) to a manipulated simulation shocked-he used this shock later to defeat within a mediated virtual reality. ‘Choice’ Hussein by shouting every known and several Despite this evidence they are not (freedom?), the hallmark of consumerism unknown foul words). A man committed suicide far from some of the thinking in now implemented in a controlled mediated by jumping out of a window. And throughout the mass culture. A connection environment that provides instant movie was script to promote licentious belittle- between spirituality and technology ‘consumer profiles’ for the provider of the ment of wholesome life and entertainment: is becoming increasingly pervasive. ‘service’. The parallels between religious rationale to lessen even further the threshold of Such abstract fundamentalism is dogma and the rhetoric driving the acceptance. rampant across discussions of the ‘information economy’ are uncanny. Indeed These are but a very few of the examples of information superhypeway. From indoctrination and thought reform the virtual (‘virtuous’) communities ignominy in this celluloid developed in the fiery (previously termed mind control) surpass pits of Hell. And the kids in the audience loved it, that distance themselves from their political propaganda and advertising in bodies to the promise of a better almost as much as the adults with them. May their manipulative power. George Orwell God have mercy on us.” future (Heaven) there are parallels may not have been bleak enough! with Christianity in the middle ages. Hallelujah! The ‘pre-millennium tension’ as referred to last issue mirrors the Yellow Peril Church’s updating of the calender with kodwo eshun [T]he next step is to listen to what these aspects of the body are saying and to realise that these different sensory levels have been really misunderstood. wasabi The DJ goes into a journey of the hands. The whole scratch is like this manual cookin perception. I figure in the future that the DJs will have extremely developed That, folks, doesn’t mean you’re Zucchini Soup fingertips, because theyre super-sensitive, like lily pads, like frogs. Their heads cookin’ with that stinky, sharp, green will be fused to their necks, and I think in about twenty years time their legs written by paste. Allow me to clarify: a little bird Ingredients may well have withered away, cause they never dance. tol’ me that Frigid’s flavour of the 1 kilo zucchinis month is that most uncourgettable of a splash of olive oil angina dentata vegetables (allow me the indiscretion 1 large onion of that pun), the humble zucchini. Also hot water Love or hate his style of musical analysis,Kodwo Kodwo Eshun, Eshun from always an interview manages with convextvto known as the courgette, the zucchini a pinch of salt and pepper be entertaining. His work for such publications as the Wire and iD has proudly flaunts its culinary flexibility. It fresh herbs to taste constantly verged between the typically sycophantic approach of music can be both a savoury and a sweet a dash of white wine journalism and the rarefied air of the academy. Fortunately he has avoided vegetable, and it can be cooked in garlic the pitfalls of both disciplines, expressing a voice that is at once credible in myriad delicious manners; you could 2 chicken or vegetable stock cubes its street knowledge and also studied in its innovative use of the work even create a three course meal directly preceding him. His first book, More Brilliant than the Sun, is simul- based on the zucchini. Who would taneously an attempt to reclaim /music writing from its have thought that you could have so Method uncritical compilations of supposed facts and an analysis of the history of much fun with the one vegetable? It’s dead easy, chop and brown the onions and garlic in the oil in the what he terms Black Sonic Fiction. bottom of a large pot. Add the roughly chopped zucchinis. When Here is a simple recipe for zucchini they’re nicely browned, add the stock cubes, and other ingredients, His approach is indicative of the fact that, although black music from negro soup, it’s an old favourite I learned and cover the lot with hot water. Boil the hell out of it. If it boils spirituals through to jazz and to hiphop has long been a legitimate course from my mother. If you can overcome down too much, add more water. When the lot is nice and mushy, of study, very rarely has there been an attempt to go beyond the surface the fact that it has the colour and puree the mix. Swirl through some sour cream, or garnish with detail and actually engage in the grain of the music. Even Tricia Rose, in consistency of mucus, it’s a delicious, cheese, and serve with crusty bread. her groundbreaking study of HipHop (Black Noise) only touched on sonics in hearty winter warmer. Happy cookin’, one chapter, preferring to rely on a study of the rhymes to find reason, kiddies! rather than on the rhythms. Though much can be learnt from this approach it does tend to miss what is perhaps the most significant development in music in the twentieth century; the loop, and more importantly, the Breakbeat. The reliance on rhymes is a reliance on the word. Deemed the only way to express meaning, it ignores the politics of sonics. Significantly, it was a jazz drummer (Max Roach) who pointed out tamarillo that even though LL Cool J’s lyrics were not political, his sonics were. Black strange fruit and radio show all in one Sonic Fiction is a resistance movement made up of disparate individuals as far flung as Sun Ra, Tricky, and Dr. Octagon who Wednesday Breakfast FBI (96.9 FM) 6-9am have as their uniting force the recontextualisation of an ostensibly oppressive late twentieth century technology, both through utilising the with yer sleep-deprived hosts Vaughan & Yellow Peril technology to shake booty (rather than to lock it down) and by creating new myths surrounding technology’s use and functions. When I was a young raver I used to you ‘ll need; scamper home at 7am from a big one to The fact much of this music is non-lyrical only makes Eshun’s abstract find my folks had tamarillos sitting in the 4 to 6 tamarillos scientific approach more necessary. In More Brilliant than the Sun we are fridge. Just the right balance of sourness (they should be taken on a ride of neollogisms, word plays and sly references, like an mc in and a sweet syrup, the tamarillos were a uniform in colour and firm) full flow, and like an mc he tends to approach topics like a guerrilla soldier; great morning refresher ensuring a the juice of at least 4 lemons striking in short bursts and then leaving the scene smouldering. 8 tablespoons of sugar tranquil comedown and sleep. Eshun’s project is inherently political. He is attempting to reclaim music as But what the hell are they? Tamarillos are Put a pin prick in the skin of each tamarillo. Blanche the a medium that is capable of meaning beyond its function on the dancefloor, and by doing that he is also reclaiming the dancefloor as a site of a tasty fruit from New Zealand which are a tamarillos quickly in boiling water. Don’t leave them in the resistance, and reconfiguring the body as a distributed brain; bit like a tomato crossed with a lemon. boiling water too long—just long enough to be able to easily peel them. Cut into quarters and spread out in a Apaprently they grow in the Andes and are ‘There’s a psychoacoustics of rhythm: the big brain anticipates the cycle, casserole or other covered dish. Cover in lemon juice—the a big South American delicacy; in New gets into the groove, lives inside the tense present of the loop. The tamarillos should be totally submerged in the juice. Zealand they are commercially farmed. In Breakbeat becomes a mnemonic […] As your ambushed by beats charging Sprinkle the sugar liberally over the submerged tamarillos, Australia they appear in supermarkets and breaks dock at your joints, tug at the muscles of your mind. Treacherous put the lid on, and ram them in the fridge overnight. fuit barns for about 6 weeks during winter underfoot, they build a new psychomotor from the old you.’ and will cost between $0.80 and $2.00 In the morning you’ll find the tamarillos have gone a p24 each. They aren’t a cheap fruit to try but darker burgundy colour and their juice has mind-melded Adventures in Sonic Fiction being a New Zealander I know the secret with the lemon juice…serve up, sit back and remember Kodwo Eshun is presenting a paper and also playing some tunes at recipe to make the tasty… the night before. Frigid on July 18. His book is called More BrilliantMore than Brilliant the than Sun: the Sun and is published by Quartet. acts Frigid happens at the Globe Venue, 379 King Street Newtown every & films JULY Sunday night, rain hail or shine SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY JULY 11th JULY 18th JULY 25th [special guest] [special guest] FRIGID/ELEFANT TRAKS La Gonda (UK) Kodwo Eshun (UK) Dougie Dimensional (Gentle People, UK) DOUBLE HEADER [DJs] Quark Kent (live) Sub Bass Snarl [special guest] Sir Robbo [DJs] Bass Elefant (live) [vision] Buggin’ Mainstream (live) Sub Bass Snarl The Last Wave Pilfernators (live) Sir Robbo Tonight we start off with Peter Weir’s 1979 film Arieto (live) about an ancient Dreamtime legend and impending [DJs] apocalypse. Set in the Rocks when they were largely Sub Bass Snarl working class housing, this is an excellent insight into what at the time were progressive portrayals of Sir Robbo Aboriginal culture. The story is about a Sydney [vision] lawyer who has strange premonitions and takes up News Unlimited a case defending a group of Aboriginal people charged with murder. Hail falls in the desert, black It's another Elefant Traks double, this time with two rain in the city, and as the lawyer gets closer to the of the harder Elefant acts—Mainstream and The ‘truth’ the Apocalypse looms. It could have done Pilfernators, alongside two more eclectic outfits with better special effects, and now in 1999, the Arieto and Bass Elefant. The Pilfernators of portrayal of ancient/Indigenous/natural versus course are fresh from their already legendary modern/Western/technological is a bit hokey, but appearance at First Fleet park on the evening of still it’s the kind of film that you might have seen on J18, where, VB throwdowns in hand, they played an ABC in the early 1980s. Ozzie version of Fuck tha Police (with home made Tonight is another double floor biggie. We have two Than The Sun: Adventures In Sonic Fiction vocal sample) to the united mass (and a fair This evening’s guest is La Gonda (Hillegonda guests from the UK—first up is Kodwo Eshun, smattering of leather outfitted (and rather bored) Rietveld). I met Gonnie in Leeds last year at a dance thinker, music critic and author of More Brilliant Police. News Unlimited will be in the mix early on music conference and she took me clubbing in (Quartet with 90 minutes of locally made short films and . Gonnie was a member of Quando Books). Kodwo will be taking you on a two hour activist news. The regular Elefant Traks merchan- Quango, an early 80s band signed to New Order’s journey of spoken word, record and video through dising stand will be up and running all night so you’ll label. With very strong links with some of the central themes of his work—utopian be able to grab any purchases that you should have Manchester, she worked at the Hacienda and has tropes in Black music from Sun Ra, Miles Davis, made before without any hassles. built up an enormous knowledge of the British Coltrane, Jamaican dub to techno, dance music scene and the changes over the last drum'n’bass, RZA and Dr Octagon. Kodwo's work two decades. She published a book last year called tries to bridge the gap between the written word This Is Our House (Arena/Ashgate) which laid out and sound, and his multimedia performance tonight histories of in Manchester, London, will make you think about music in new ways. Also Rotterdam, Amsterdam and Chicago , and tonight sees the return of Dougee Dimensional theorised about its changing form. In Sydney to give from The Gentle People (Rephlex Records UK). a paper at UTS (9am Sunday 11th July) on new Dougee will be playing some of the new Gentle house music in London, her set tonight will be People material and also some more of his packed with some of her favourite tunes and some favourite tunes. Local guests will be Buggin' and tuff new sounds from London. Free entry to anyone Quark Kent, who will be playing material from his who can bring along one of her Quando Quango new album due out in August. releases on Factory Records… getchya hand off it grandpa AUGUST july SUNDAY AUGUST 1st picks with your host Yellow Peril Kid Loco/Various Jesus Life for FRIGID’s THIRD Children Under 12 Inches (Yellow Productions) BIRTHDAY!!! Source: Juno UK

[guests] Kid Loco’s solo work for Yellow Productions has been bubbling under Seymour Butz for ages. With elements of Gemma psychedelic pop and hip hop beats, DJ Crucial above: flyer from the third month of Frigid. Kid Loco fits between the soft focus and friends output of Pork Recordings (Fila Brazillia et al) and the French hip hop [DJs] of labelmate DJ Cam. Here on Jesus Sub Bass Snarl SUNDAY Life, Kid Loco presents a selection of Sir Robbo remixes done for other crews. I AUGUST 8th surmise that Kid Loco’s prolific remix [vision] work for British pop bands may We’ll see… [guests] indeed be a result of the close asso- ciations developed with both St Blaze Three years it has been since Frigid first opened back Etienne and Pulp. Anyway, what is in 1996 at Kinselas. The first six months of Frigid’ s Koolism (Canberra) presented are twelve remixes of life were as a single floor free Sunday nighter with Levelheads tracks from the aforementioned St guests ranging from a very young Metabass & Explanetary with F.Inj Etienne and Pulp plus Talvin Singh, Breath to Willow, one of our early Atomic Hi-Fi col- Quro/Emesyve High Llamas, Mogwai, Badmarsh & laborators. There were collectable fliers themed by Shri, The Pastels, Uriel and Tommy Trey movie stars, great revolutionaries, great psychedelic Hools. At its best, the remix of scientists, and some other memorable occasions like Fathom Mogwai’s Tracy, Talvin Singh’s the Loungeroom night where everyone DJed in their DJ ALF Traveller, Tommy Hools’ Les dressing gowns while guests watched telly and played Reprouves, The Pastels’ Viaduct and Atari 2600s. Then came the two years at The Dendy [DJs] St Etienne’s 4:35 In The Morning, which saw Frigid grow into a larger and more diverse Sub Bass Snarl Kid Loco puts the original track club with us properly incorporating the film element. Sir Robbo through the blender and, whilst often The Dendy years also played host to a short series of keeping the vocals intact, turns the Tonight is a hip hop double header with Tim from parties with Club Kooky called Dung. The first Dung tracks not so much on their heads, Explanetary bringing together some of Sydney’s was NYE 1997/8 and was a cheap alternative to but more into a languid horizontal underground heads together for some akshun. the preposterously priced other parties. Anyway, the position. Dendy changed management and the bar deteriorat- Canberra’s finest, Koolism, will be on hand ed to its present state where it hosts dodgy house alongside MC Trey who has a debut album parties so we left. This year we moved into our coming on Creative Vibes, plus former Adelaide Andy Weatherall & present home at the Globe where we reunited with head Quro, plus Fathom & Levelheads and DJs Richard Fearless/Various the soundman (and sound man) from Kinselas; Blaze and ALF (from Joined at the Bass and Live At The Social Volume 3 Richard Austin. Things started slowly at the Globe Trace Element).With a minimum of hype the (React) but have now picked up and all is good. Tonight evening should provide for some high quality there’ll be guests who have been most closely tied beats and rhymes. There’ll also be a stall with Source: MDS with Frigid over the years, plus all the regular tapes and local vinyl for those who don’t go birthday goodness; the legendary cake, and probably record shopping that often. The last two Live At The Social CDs a Jackie Chan film or a movie remix. by the Chemical Brothers and Jon Carter, were, when they originally Fridge Artists’ 9. Also there is Mice came out, eclectic mish-mashes EPH Parade’s live drum loop and of tracks new and old which char- (Go Beat) xylophone construction Organic acterised the nature of big beat reproduction Attempt, Live at a time before it was called big Source: Juno UK Human’s loping We Walk On All beat. Since then big beat has This is Fridge’s third album and Fours, the New Order circa narrowed into a form of whiter- first for Polydor subsidiary Go 1983 Spontaneous Combustion than-white rock’n’roll for kids who Beat and it seems as if all the from Immense and the wall-of- think the Prodigy is the real shit extra major label money has gone sound My Bloody Valentine styled and Fatboy Slim ‘rocks’. Anyway, into production. EPH sounds Paradise from Transient Waves. enough of my diatribe. Live At superb and sees Fridge realise The best thing about Fat Cat is The Social Three is a different their subtle blend of electronics their ability to transcend the kettle of fish altogether. Disc one with their live guitars, bass and latest sounds and work out on a is mixed by the great Andy drums with a clarity and richness limb in several, if you would Weatherall, perhaps the original lacking on some of the early believe the music press, dance-rock crossover man with releases. With loose drums, slow conflicting genres. The other Fat his early 90s remixes of My moody basslines and fragile Cat release is the full length Bloody Valentine and Primal electronics bubbling away each of album from Live Human. With DJ Scream and then the Sabres Of the eight tracks are excellent. Quest on turntables, a drummer paradise and Two Lone The album is also cleverly and a cellist, Live Human reminds Swordsmen. Weatherall shows structured with each track from me of Peril. Sometimes the his current penchant for deep the opener Ark becoming more tracks work and other times they house on disc one which is about edgy. The outstanding are loose cacophonies of rather as far away as you can get from combination of scattered drums dull hip hop turntablism and dear big beat. It opens with several and increasingly dense patterns predictable drums. Especially at excellent semi-vocal cuts including and saxophone on Bad Ischl is a the start of Monstereosis it as the excellent Marshall perfect precursor to the soft almost as if you are listening to a degrassi, Jefferson/Noosa Heads track electronic Yttrium and the violins rockin’ big beat record crossed Mushrooms before dropping into of the nine minute closer with outtakes from Q-Bert. Better some more percussive house Aphelion. An excellent album and to stick with the compilation. with Lionrock’s alter-ego a welcome respite from repetitive Gentlemen Thief, Nick Holder, The beats. Cartridge Family and then Various smoothing out to end with Ashley Live Human Mission Control Dear Degrassi, Beedle’s mix of Sakamoto and Monosterosis: The New (Trouble On Vinyl) I’ve been a huge Baywatch fan ever since it Steve Rachmad. Weatherall’s mix Victrola Method Well, no one of Dana Plato’s calibre died in started! I’ve even endured years of Pamela. the past month, so I don’t really have any is not as interesting as it should (Fat Cat) As the end of The real reason I watch it though is that I’m have been and after the first five drum’n’bass gets ever more excuse for not getting it together and writing Various an enormous David Hasslehoff fan! But the or so tracks it becomes a bit dull caught up in apocalyptic science something prior to 2 days before deadline. Across Uneven Terrain: red swimsuits are really starting to get to me a bad sign for someone as fiction visions it makes you Maybe it’s the fact that the Cyclic crew all 1997–1999 piled into a car and battled peak hour traffic and the plots are starting to get just a little bit innovative as he has shown to be wonder whether they’ve been more contrived and tedious. As far as I know, (Fat Cat) smoking a little to much pot and to drive out to Parramatta in order to have a in the past. Disc two is mixed by David Hasslehoff was unheard of before this the paranoia combined with pre- zucchini feast, only to find out that the Death In Vegas’ Richard Fearless Source: Juno UK show. I thought if anyone could tell me that and is full of electro and techno millennial vibes has taken over. “Zucchini Eatery” is only open during working he’s appeared in anything else, it would be tracks and a couple of classics Fat Cat used to a renowned What was once nihilistic urban hours on week days! It took us a long time to you! Please help…I’m starting to get the urge along the way ending with a three record shop in London until the gangsterism has gone into get over that!..but fortunately it’s a very long to have silicon breasts implants! Detroit classics in a row—Ron bubble burst and it closed. outerspace via the Alien movies trip back to the city and we were over it by Rather than shut up shop the time Parramatta Road turns into Trent’s Altered States, E-Dancer’s and X-Files. Here on Trouble On Muffy Implode (Kevin Saunderson) Warp, and permanently, Fat Cat became a Vinyl’s latest compile Mission Broadway. Still, there’s always the Zucchini releasing some of Bros in the food court below Grace Bros in 69’s () Ladies & Control, the kids in the oversized Girl, I don’t know where to start picking your the best and most eclectic 12”s the city if you really need that zucchini fix! Gentlemen. In between there are puffa jackets pull together faults! Have you forgotten to take that special of the last two years; from Why the zucchini fixation? It’s just a fantasti- tracks from Model 500, Slam, relentless rolling beats and medication that’s been prescribed to you? I to Funkstörung, Various cally versatile vegetable, second only to the Mike Dred plus Germans Third searing synthesizer scrapes and can only offer advice and I just hope for your Artists to Mice Parade. On their eggplant! Electric, Kit Builders, DJ Hell and shears. Unfortunately the RAM sake (and possibly the sake of those around official label compilation Across I-F’s classic Space Invaders Are people are doing this too, as is I do have something to rejoice about though, you) that you take it! To get started though, Uneven Terrain, several of the Smoking Grass. It’s a solid mix everyone else in the scene, and because Family Ties is starting up again on you really have to give your parents a good best Fat Cat tracks are compiled and quite diverse but, the whole new ideas are hard to find, but Foxtel as of 5th July! I’ve missed those funky talking to and possibly even divorce them for onto CD for the first time. There’s package lacks the diversity and nevertheless Mission Control is tan three-piece suits Alex used to wear, giving you such a terrible name! Sure, there’s weird deconstructed electronics ingenuity of the earlier Live At an easy way to get a slab of Malory’s bimbotic banter—and in a weird, always Mitzi Kapture, but she was also in Silk from Process and Fonn, The Social mixes. latest tracks together plus a sick kind of way I also kind of miss Jennifer— Stalkings as well as Baywatch so it’s her god Funkstörung’s reconstruction of bonus mix CD for accompanying I just don’t know why! given right to have such a name. Björk’s All Is Full Of Love and your power-walks around Autechre’s remix of Various Centennial Park. stay up just that little bit later to watch it. using his Dick Tracey style watch-like Comlink If only there were space for me to include the Actually, David had appeared in The Young and what was also a video camera and had the rules of the drinking game. For the Restless before this, but it was Knight power to open locks. KITT also didn’t have seat those of you who like to mix their cult television Rider that made him a star and 80’s icon. belts as these were replaced by the Passive viewing with severe liver damage, please e-mail Laser Restraint System. And to think that KITT me: [email protected] and I’ll send you a copy. David Hasslehoff plays Michael Knight, who was was able to run all this on a 5000KB memory originally Michael Long (not to be confused with housed within the frame of a black, customised the brilliant Essendon footballer [ed])—an below: The man is big in Germany apparently; David Hasselhoff, All American good looks and a swish car undercover policeman who is shot in the face Pontiac Trans-Am. to boot, what more could a girl want? A personality, and left for dead. Lucky for him, a As KITT was obviously on the road a lot, the businessman/philanthropist, Wilton Knight, just perhaps? Below that is the interior of the softly FLAG Mobile Command Centre that was spoken KITT, distant cousin of HAL and the bastard happens to find and rehabilitate him, giving him contained within in a semi-trailer, was a a new identity and surgically recreate his face child of a one night stand between Davros and a necessity. Here KITT was maintained by the likes shopping trolley (drinking Frigid Pis apparently). Below in the image of his long lost son, Garth. Garth of mechanics Reginald Cornellius III (aka RC3), appears later in the series and attempts to that even further (if you can actually make out the lo- Dr Bonnie Barstow and by Dr April Curtis. bring down Michael Knight and KITT, viewing his res jpeg downloaded from the net and then twice father’s misguided plastic surgery as an insult. Your average Knight Rider episode would photocopied) is the FLAG semi-trailer. Amazingly This little plot twist also allows for some very include: enough, it looks just like a black semi-trailer… shonky special effects and stand-ins as David Hasslehoff has to play both characters. Now • Michael joking around with KITT while working there’s something too good for a fan like you to undercover to solve crimes almost in the style of miss! a vigilante team under the instruction of FLAG, headed by Devon; Unfortunately, Wilton is not far from death himself and eventually dies leaving the future of • an invariably long driving/musical sequence; Knight Industries in the hands of his trusted friend and business partner, Devon Miles. Now • turbo boosts; Muffy, I know you’d have no idea, but some of • the development and installation of new the more ancient Cyclic Defrost readers may gadgets for KITT; remember him as the actor who played the friendly ghost in the television series of “The • Michael flirting with the female mechanics; Ghost and Mrs Muir”. • Devon thinking Michael is somewhat uncooth; Michael is set to work for a division of Knight and Industries called the Foundation for Law and Government or FLAG. This division developed • Michael and KITT beating the bad guys and KARR (Knight Automated Roving Robot) before Michael flirting outrageously the female guest it reached perfection with KITT (Knight star (who was generally a victim). Industries Two Thousand). KARR was to KITT Since Knight Rider was axed in 1986, the show what Cousin Sabrina was to Samantha Stevens has taken on cult status. The creators tried to in Bewitched. It had all the same powers as cash in on this in 1991 by producing the big KITT and looked pretty similar, but it had one budget film Knight Rider 2000 that was above: three different faces of KITT… major flaw that was that its primary directive yes, Virginia, that supposed to be pilot for a new series, but it is two more than David Hasselhoff. was its own self-preservation with no regard for human life. KITT, on the other hand, was lacked the flair of the original. This was a major programmed to protect the innocent, accept flop mainly due to the fact, I feel, that KITT was The fact that you think that Baywatch was voice commands and make its own decisions. replaced with a red Firebird called KIFT (Knight David Hasslehoff’s springboard to global KITT’s artificial intelligence was so advanced Industries Four Thousand). More recently, Team stardom does suggest that you were born that he was able to form close relationships Knight Rider was more successful, but it pales some time after the seventies ended. I think with the FLAG team, and especially his partner in comparison to the original. Their characters we’re definitely going to have to have the Michael Knight. aren’t as well defined and the fact that there are bouncer at Frigid start checking ID more a fleet of cars with personalities makes it seem ferociously, or at the very least, I.Q. Well, KITT could reach speeds of 480kph and had a more ridiculously far-fetched, as opposed to Muffy, you have missed out on one of the whole host of nifty gadgets and weapons such Knight Rider which was completely believable. greatest television shows known to western as a grappling hook, a flame thrower, smoke Also, steer well clear of the cheap and civilisation. Knight Rider—84 episodes of pure bombs, turbo boosts (making KITT increase deceivingly titled Knight Rider 2010 that is in no entertainment that first aired in 1982. I was speed dramatically or jump up to 150 meters way associated with the Knight Rider only in the 2nd grade, but because my parents vertically), infrared sensing systems and a phenomenon. It is the story of a woman whose saw that this was an important show both remote communications system that Michael mind is implanted in a home made car and that technologically and culturally, I was allowed to could use to summon him. 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