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30 22 AWP Full Magazine Brooklyn’s Real Newspaper BrooklynPaper.com • (718) 834–9350 • Brooklyn, NY • ©2007 BROOKLYN HEIGHTS–DOWNTOWN EDITION AWP/18 pages • Vol. 30, No. 22 • Saturday, June 2, 2007 • FREE INCLUDING DUMBO POWER LIES It turns out state was wrong — A’Yards will tax electric service, raising rates By Dana Rubinstein The Brooklyn Paper When your electric bill goes up, put some of the blame on Atlantic Yards, Con Edison officials said last week. The utility’s assessment, given at an Assembly hearing in Albany on May 23, apparently contradicts as- / Melissa Saks surances by Atlantic Yards support- ers in the state government who last year insisted that Bruce Ratner’s mega-development would have only an “insignificant” impact on the en- Paper The Brooklyn ergy grid. Three parking agents patrol Montague Street in Brooklyn Heights — the city’s most-ticketed neighborhood. Con Ed officials testified that they needed a 17-percent rate hike to boost an energy infrastructure that will be strained by developments like those planned at Atlantic Yards and the West Side railyards. SHOW OF FORCE Company spokesman Chris Olert later sought to soften his bosses’ / Gregory P. Mango P. / Gregory statements, asserting that the At- lantic Yards and West Side railyards B’Heights a cash cow for traffic agents, city are “just one megapixel in the giant diorama of city projects.” By Melissa Saks as traffic enforcement officers fanned out for fear of getting a parking ticket. “No one “Look at the projects in Brooklyn for The Brooklyn Paper across Montague Street the other day. “My in Brooklyn Heights says anything.” car has been towed three times!” Others blame the NYPD’s supposed alone, like the new passenger ship Illegal parkers in Brooklyn Heights The Brooklyn Paper The Brooklyn There are many theories as to why 84th “quota system,” which requires officers to terminal, the expansion of Steiner mean big money for city coffers. Studios in the Navy Yard,” said Ol- Precinct cops and traffic agents — who write a certain number of tickets or be rep- Through May 27, the 84th Precinct was cover Brooklyn Heights, Boerum Hill, rimanded. ert. “The city’s in the midst of a credited with a whopping 20,210 sum- On your guard boom.” DUMBO and Downtown — write so “It runs in spurts because of the quota Members of the 84th New York Infantry (aka 14th Brooklyn, wearing red) and the monses — a 6.2-percent increase from the many parking tickets. system,” said Fort Greene resident Neville That did little to mollify Atlantic same time last year. 67th New York Infantry (wearing blue) line up in formation as they prepare to fire their Yards opponents, who saw the com- Some believe it’s all about the Ben- Pinnock, who has worked in Brooklyn Parking ticket fines range from $35 to jamins. Heights for more than 40 years. “They be- weapons at Green-Wood Cemetery on Monday. For story and photos, see page 5. pany’s very public admission as yet $180 each. one more strike against the Empire “They know the people in this neighbor- come more diligent when they are trying to “That’s life in the city,” Doug Biviano, a hood will pay the tickets!” said one Brook- meet their quota.” State Development Corporation, the neighborhood resident for seven years, said state agency that concluded in No- lyn Heights man who requested anonymity The NYPD denied that there is any pres- vember that Atlantic Yards’ “increas- sure on officers to write tickets — except THE FULL MARTY es in [energy] demand would be in- when they see a parking violation, of course. significant.” “The NYPD has no quotas,” said Detec- • FREE CRUISE UPDATE Opponents have long argued that How many tickets is 20,210? tive Brian Sessa, a police spokesman. the ESDC’s “environmental impact And there certainly are plenty of viola- • CB6 PURGE UPDATE statement” looked at the eight-million- The Brooklyn Paper tions. square-foot Atlantic Yards project in a The 84th Precinct has handed out more than 20,000 parking tickets so far this A 2006 study found that there are almost • NEW GOV. ISLAND FERRY vacuum without fully considering the year. Here’s a few ways of putting that into perspective: twice as many cars circling around Brooklyn • HONORS ‘MAD’ MAG FOUNDER impact of the tens of millions of addi- • It’s more than all of the tickets given out in Staten Island this year. Heights as there are spaces at any given time. tional square feet of residential, com- • If lined up end to end, they would stretch to almost two miles (1.9 miles) One reason for all the circling is the sup- mercial, retail and office space being • It’s 5,010 more tickets than were handed out in Lower Manhattan during the posed abuse of government-issued parking SEE PAGE16 built or slated to be built in the imme- same period. — Melissa Saks permits, which allow the possessor to take See LIES on page 16 See TICKETS on page 16 Williamsburg man’s strand nips the competition By Harry Cheadle long.” Curious to see what the by day, he’s an internal medi- the music for dramatic effect, an entire generation of young for The Brooklyn Paper record was, he looked it up and cine specialist at Wyckoff Med- announcing “the world’s largest people, mostly boys, to grow found out it was only four and a ical Center in Bushwick. nipple hair!” long body hairs and achieve It’s official! No one in the half inches, considerably shorter It might seem excessive to “How many inches?” some- their own dreams.” world has a longer nipple hair than the hair sprouting from his bring in a medical doctor for a body asked before a hush came Afterwards, Williams posed than Doug Williams. own vestigal mammary gland. single hair, but the Guinness over the crowd. proudly. Last Saturday, Williams had Those close to Williams Book requires that the measurer The official length came out “This is more or less the his celebrated chest hair meas- thought it was, well, a little odd. is a licensed doctor with “stand- to 129 millimeters — the Guin- most attention my nipple has ured at a barbeque in his Wil- “Initially, I was a little bit sur- ing in the community.” And that’s ness Book uses the Euro-centric ever received,” he noted. liamsburg backyard, complete prised,” said girlfriend Malika just one of many complex regula- metric system — or a little Once the paperwork goes with a grill, a keg, and even a Crutchfield. “But after checking tions imposed on the record- longer than five inches, demol- through, Williams will be immor- DJ. A group of photographers out the hair, I realized he had a breaking event. Williams filled ishing the previous record of 115 talized. But he hasn’t lost his and a videographer were also on shot at the record. I’m thrilled.” out pages of paperwork, the hair millimeters. sense of self, advising would-be hand, clustered around Williams The record-breaker himself re- had to be measured three times That once-illustrious mark nipple-hair champions to “just to get the best shot of the aston- mained low-key. “It’s a genetic and photographed, and it had to was held by Simon Mould, the follow your dreams, whether it’s ishing strand. thing,” he said with a shrug, as re- be wet during the process. pride of the United Kingdom. to grow long nipple hair or some- The barbeque was the culmi- porters hounded him with more To meet this last require- Trouncing Mould at his own thing equally as important.” nation of Williams’s quest to get questions than the beat writers ment, Crutchfield squirted bot- / Graham Letorney game was fun, but Williams told But Williams is not one to the hair into the Guinness Book who follow around Barry Bonds. tled water on Williams’s bare The Brooklyn Paper last week rest on his laurels. He’s got big- of World Records. He says he Measuring duties fell to Dr. chest from a couple feet away. that jealousy was not why he got ger follicles to fry. didn’t set out to break the covet- Sagat Verma, who bent over “That’s good,” he said, but into the nipple-hair game. “Hopefully I’ll discover a ed record, it just happened. Williams and carefully extended she gave it a couple extra “I am not attempting this very long hair somewhere else One morning, Williams was the strand, holding it against a squirts, just to be sure. Paper The Brooklyn record for the money,” he said on my body,” he said. “taking stock” of his nipple hair tape measure. Appraising nipple Then Dr. Verma measured Hair apparent: A doctor measures Doug Williams's nipple hair while a film crew documents before his quest. “It is enough A true champion, it seems, is and noticed one was “really growths isn’t Verma’s specialty; the hair while the DJ stopped the historic event. The hair measured 5.078 inches, breaking the Guinness Book record. for me to know that I can inspire never satisfied. Circus is Boo-liani in Ridge coming to Protestors rally against Rudy Coney Isl. By Matthew Lysiak The Brooklyn Paper Republican frontrunner Rudy Giuliani got a hero’s By Dana Rubinstein welcome inside a Bay Ridge catering hall this week The Brooklyn Paper — but outside, the man running for president as Coney Island is not dead yet, apparently. “America’s Mayor” got Swift-boated. The carnival community will come alive for at least About four dozen protesters, mostly relatives of a few more days this summer, thanks to 13 perform- World Trade Center victims and firefighters who typi- ances by the Cole Bros.
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