My Uncle

Shakespeare

By Gad Guterman

Performance Rights It is an infringement of the federal copyright law to copy this script in any way or to perform this play without royalty payment. All rights are controlled by Eldridge Publishing Co. Inc. Contact the publisher for additional scripts and further licensing information. The author’s name must appear on all programs and advertising with the notice: “Produced by special arrangement with Eldridge Publishing Co.” PUBLISHED BY ELDRIDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY www.histage.com © 2003 by Gad Guterman

Download your complete script from Eldridge Publishing http://www.histage.com/playdetails.asp?PID=1670 My Uncle Shakespeare - 2 -

Dedication This play is dedicated to Margot Celnik, my grandmother.

STORY OF THE PLAY When leads Margaret Douglas to Memory, a place where only those remembered can live, she is confused as to her whereabouts. Shakespeare eagerly tells her two stories to help her answer her questions. The first story is that of Thomas Hart, Shakespeare’s young nephew who unsuccessfully attempts to master his uncle’s craft. The second story is that of Sarah Douglas, Margaret’s hopeless granddaughter who seems incapable of completing any task or keeping any friends. As Shakespeare weaves the two tales, Margaret begins to understand that she has died and that she is in fact Thomas' distant relative. Now Shakespeare needs her help to reach Sarah, who will find the lost manuscript of Thomas’ play and restore the boy’s place in Memory.

Premiere Performance This play was written for and first performed by the students at the Dwight-Englewood School in Englewood, NJ on May 10, 2002.

My Uncle Shakespeare - 3 -

CHARACTERS (Large, flexible cast. Much doubling possible as most of Shakespeare's relatives only appear in the family tree in Act II.)

Main characters William Shakespeare Thomas Hart, his nephew, a young man Sarah Douglas, a modern-day seventh grader Grandmother 1 Grandmother 2

Characters in the present: Matt, a very cute seventh grader Jaime, Matt’s friend Peter, another friend Cop Jessica, a girl on roller-blades Amy, Sarah’s older sister Mom, Sarah and Amy’s mother Isabel, Amy’s friend Dr. Morgan, a professor of literature Scholar 1 Scholar 2 Scholar 3 Bobby, a local theater director Rachel King, a news writer TV Newscaster Residents of Highland Park

In Thomas’ play: Superhero (same actor playing Jessica) Hydra, a nine-headed monster

Characters in the past: William Hart, Thomas’ older brother Olivia, a matron in Stratford Violet, the town gossip Henry, Thomas’ best friend (Cast List continued on next page.) My Uncle Shakespeare - 4 -

Sir George Buck, the Master of Revels Julius Shaw, the bailiff A Boy Reporter And Shakespeare’s other relatives: (doubling possible) Judith Quiney Anne Hathaway Mary Arden Joan Shakespeare #1 Margaret Shakespeare Gilbert Shakespeare Joan Shakespeare #2 (later Joan Hart) Anne Shakespeare Richard Shakespeare Edmund Shakespeare Edward Shakespeare Elizabeth Hall Thomas Nash John Barnard William Hart, Sr. Margaret Hart William Shakespeare Hart Villagers

SETTING: The ridges of Memory. Can be a cluttered old attic, as in the original production, or any flexible, plastic space.

PROPS: The play can be performed with real objects or mimed ones, depending on the representation of Memory. In the original production the following were used: boom box, quill, candles, manuscript pages, simple casket, crossword puzzles, Shakespeare’s will, a bucket, large paper leaves, camera, hats, phones, and video camera and microphone. My Uncle Shakespeare - 5 -

ACT I

(GRANDMOTHER 1 and SHAKESPEARE ENTER dancing. He spins her. She looks around the space, amazed and confused, a lost child in a magic land.)

SHAKESPEARE: ‘Tis spectacular, isn’t it? GRANDMOTHER 1: (Dusting off a bit.) Well… SHAKESPEARE: It’s unattended once in a while. Here, sit. You must be tired. GRANDMOTHER 1: (Doesn’t sit.) You—? SHAKESPEARE: Yes. William Shakespeare, at your gentle service. GRANDMOTHER 1: But … you don’t seem… I don’t mean any disrespect, but you don’t fill the space with as much pizzazz as …. I thought. SHAKESPEARE: Fret not. It happens all the time. I am, in essence, Shakespeare: playwright, actor and philosopher of yore. His very spirit. We all appear different once here. GRANDMOTHER 1: Once where? SHAKESPEARE: Can I tell you a story? GRANDMOTHER 1: After you tell me where I am. SHAKESPEARE: The story will answer all your questions. GRANDMOTHER 1: All right then. Shoot. SHAKESPEARE: Sit. Please. GRANDMOTHER 1: Shakespeare telling me a story. Go figure. You know, I always get all your clues right. (SHAKESPEARE looks at HER blankly.) In the crossword. SHAKESPEARE: Oh. Thank you. Now, the story.... Hmm… Where to begin? GRANDMOTHER 1: The beginning? SHAKESPEARE: I’m afraid it’s a bit more complicated. There’s the past, the present, the (Gesturing to their space.) ne’er-between. GRANDMOTHER 1: You’re frightening me. Where are we? SHAKESPEARE: Got it. Two households… GRANDMOTHER 1: (Complaining.) I know this one. SHAKESPEARE: No, no, no. All artists need to recycle their stuff now and then. Listen. My Uncle Shakespeare - 6 -

GRANDMOTHER 1: Okay. SHAKESPEARE: Two households, both alike in dignity but unlike in place and time. One in the present, I dare say modern day, although we can never be sure about that. The location: Highland Park, New Jersey, a small, average town in the American continent. GRANDMOTHER 1: Hey, I live there. SHAKESPEARE: Oh yes. You play a part in the story, gentle lady. As do I. We’re both mere players in what is about to unfold. So, Highland Park the year (current year).

(SARAH ENTERS and begins to set up a karaoke machine.)

SARAH: Good afternoon, Highland Park! Guys and dolls of all ages, it is my pleasure to bring to you today the very first installment of Broadway on Broad Street, a new treat conceived by the conceiver of the Broad Street Blood Bank and Bagels of Broad Street: Me! OFF-STAGE VOICE (As shoe is thrown.) Give it up, freakazoid! SARAH: No, this time’s for real. Sorry, guys and dolls of all ages. The show begins. “If I were a rich man…”

(SARAH continues to mime singing while the second story sets up.)

GRANDMOTHER 1: Is that—? SHAKESPEARE: (Interrupting.) The second household in the thriving little village of Stratford—the one in England. The date: April 25, 1616—not my favorite date in history.

(THOMAS has set up his writing station. WILLIAM ENTERS, dressed up with black gloves.)

WILLIAM: ‘Tis time. We must go now. (THOMAS continues writing.) Here. Your black gloves. Mother washed them in a hurry. (THOMAS writes.) Put the cursed plume down!

(THOMAS stops, but does not move or look up.) My Uncle Shakespeare - 7 -

WILLIAM: I’m sorry, Thomas. ‘Tis difficult for all of us.

(HE LEAVES the gloves and exits. THOMAS puts writing materials away and puts the gloves on as SARAH sings out loud.)

SARAH: (In most cat-like way.) “Memory…”

(MATT, JAIME and PETER ENTER, laughing.)

JAIME & PETER: (Screeching.) Meeeemoooorrry… SARAH: Hi, Matt. JAIME: (PETER soon joins in.) Hi, Matt. I loooove you, Matt. Marry me, Matt. Kiss me, hold me, touch— MATT: Man, shut up! JAIME: Can we go? MATT: (To SARAH) What—? (Gestures to the microphone.) SARAH: Oh, it’s from “Cats.” I’m doing a new— PETER: Wait. YOU are trying something new? JAIME: What’s this? Like the fifteen-hundredth project of the month? SARAH: No, I— PETER: What? You what? “This time’s for real, guys.” JAIME: “For real. This time’s for real.” SARAH: Matt? MATT: Dude! It’s a … uh … it’s a pretty song. SARAH: Thank you. JAIME: He’s joking, you loser. PETER: It’s a stupid song. SARAH: What do you know? JAIME: I know anything you do—I mean try to do—is pretty— PETER: Moronic. JAIME: Yeah. What was it on Monday? Fortune-telling? PETER: No, man. Monday she was planting flowers by the school. JAIME: Oh yeah, didn’t those all die? End of Freeview Download your complete script from Eldridge Publishing http://www.histage.com/playdetails.asp?PID=1670 Eldridge Publishing, a leading drama play publisher since 1906, offers more than a thousand full-length plays, one-act plays, melodramas, holiday plays, religious plays, children's theatre plays and musicals of all kinds. For more than a hundred years, our family-owned business has had the privilege of publishing some of the finest playwrights, allowing their work to come alive on stages worldwide.

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