ENTERTAINMENTpage 21 Technique • Friday, January 19, 2001 • 21
Two Bits Horoscopes Tigers, dragons, oh my! ENTERTAINMENT Ever wonder what your choice of major Ang Lee’s subtitled Crouching Tiger, says about you? If so, the Two Bits Man Hidden Dragon is quite an exercise in Technique • Friday, January 19, 2001 has got just what you need. Page 24 epic filmmaking. Page 25 Don’t expect sudden rush to ‘Snatch’ up this garbled film By Andrew Pilsch luted caper. This time, the film use Mickey instead. Oh yeah, The editor needs bylines! is nasty instead of funny. and a lot of other people who Franky Four Fingers (Bene- the audience won’t care about MPAA Rating: R cio Del Toro) steals a “flawless” are involved in hunting for the Starring: Brad Pitt, Benecio Del 84-karat diamond from Antw- diamond. Toro, Dennis Farina, erp while dressed as a Hasidic So this description sounds like Vinnie Jones Jew. He then heads to London a great caper, but when com- Director: Guy Ritchie with the diamond in a briefcase pared to Ritchie’s last movie— Studio: Screen Gems strapped to his arm. Explaining which was great—this movie Running Time: 104 minutes how the rest of the characters really falls flat. I admit the mov- Rating: yy become involved would be an ie is funny, and one of the two exercise in futile confusion with- running jokes is actually quite If you were too busy laugh- out the use of flow charts and amusing, but overall, it’s just not ing during Lock, Stock and Two other visual aids. The story here as good. Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels to catch the point, is a convoluted mess of charac- Smoking Barrels was so good be- director Guy Ritchie would like ters with clever names—Franky cause it came out of nowhere, to have a few words with you. Four Fingers, Bullet Tooth Tony, was acted by nobodies with in- Of course, you could just go see Brick Top, One Punch Mickey comprehensible accents, and left his new movie Snatch instead, O’Neil, Boris the Blade, etc. its audiences in stitches. In Snatch, since his calendar is going to be The main plot arc—or at least the audience is faced with a sto- tied up with his new bride, Ma- the one that directly involves ry that doesn’t allow any of its donna. Mr. Ritchie is a little the narrator, Turkish (Jason characters to develop and leaves miffed by the fact that Lock, Stock Statham)—concerns an unli- them with a vague sense of hav- and Two Smoking Barrels was so censed boxing promoter trying ing seen this movie before. funny that people didn’t get the to stay out of trouble with un- The most glaring problem film’s central message, that “crime derworld crime boss Brick Top. with Snatch is its complexity. doesn’t pay.” So, he hits the streets His fighter is put in the hospital Where most films focus on four of London once again, with a by One Punch Mickey O’Neil or five characters and develops By Daniel Smith / SCREEN GEMS vast cast of pathetic low-lifes in- (Brad Pitt), a gypsy bare-knuck- Brad Pitt joins an extensive cast as Mickey O’Neil, an Irish boxer, in the new film volved in a massive and convo- led fighter, and he’s forced to See Snatch, page 23 Snatch. This is director Guy Ritchie’s first film credit since he became Mr. Madonna! ‘Vampire’ escapes shadows King Johnson explores life beyond the blues By Bobby Bowman many levels. Malkovich’s frustrated ge- By Alan Back Mewherter had been one than Col. Bruce Hampton.) Finally, his story is here... nius and Dafoe’s melodramatic vampire Likes to juggle time bombs of Wood’s classmates at Geor- “It took us an album and a are exceptional, especially in their shared gia State and had stints with half or so to find a sound that MPAA Rating: R scenes. The production and direction of Music fans have always had Ray Charles and Al Jarreau to was ours,” Wood explained. Starring: John Malkovich, Willem Dafoe Shadow stays true to the silent film era. their own particular ways of his credit. James, who had “It’s been evolving over the Director: E. Elias Merhige This includes using film cards to narrate paying homage to their idols. played with everyone from the years…just us kind of allow- Distributor: Lions Gate certain plot elements. The scenes in which Some collect albums and mer- Ringling Brothers Barnum and ing ourselves to be creative and Rating: yyyyy Murnau is filming Nosferatu convert from chandise. Some follow bands Bailey Circus to the late Steve do what comes naturally. I color to black and white seamlessly. The from city to city during tours. Allen, came in at a friend’s think it has taken us away from F.W. Murnau (John Malkovich) com- dialogue is nostalgic while the plot stays Some set up fan clubs and/or suggestion to replace original traditional things, which is ments at the end of Shadow of the Vam- inventive, providing a creative gem in a turn into deranged stalkers just sax player John Longo. Re- good, I think.” pire that “if it’s not in the frame, it doesn’t year of mostly unremarkable films. to keep everybody honest. garding the departure, Wood King Johnson shopped exist.” It is Murnau’s attempt to capture Shadow of the Vampire defies genre Then you have groups like stated, “He’s more of a stay- Luck So Strange to various la- authenticity on film that fuels the plot. classification and smoothly blends the King Johnson, which chris- at-home kind of guy, and we bels in order to distribute it to In 1921, Murnau directed a retelling of elements of horror, drama, and comedy. tened itself in honor of all the were starting to travel quite a a wider audience, but the job the Dracula story in the German silent This is not merely a horror film, as it blues greats who have carried bit. We needed somebody who proved easier said than done. film Nosferatu. Shadow of the Vampire avoids cheap thrill elements common to either of those two names. could travel and do what we Wood asserted that one label charts the filming of Nosferatu with the modern horror films. Its horror is more While this local five-piece has were doing, and we were lucky was ready to put out the al- fictional premise that an authentic vam- reminiscent of Boris Karloff and Lon since been tackling nearly any- bum, but suddenly found it- pire, Max Schreck (Willem Dafoe), was Chaney pictures. The ending, more sur- thing its members cook up, self caught up in a lawsuit that hired to star. The crew leaves the sound- real than horrific, seems to recall the disil- they never lose sight of where put the plans on hold. stage to film in Luxembourg. The crew lusionment of Sunset Boulevard’s they started or what a mix of “It’s common for “It left us very nervous and endures odd stipulations in filming— conclusion. The final scene fits perfectly, tradition and originality can us to reach back left them temporarily para- they may only film at night and in re- as director and vampire reach their differ- do in the right hands. lyzed. We were anxious to put mote locationss. The director attributes ent goals with similar consequences. The band began to take to the music of the it out and excited about it, so this odd behavior to method acting. Mur- At the heart of this vampire story is shape when guitarist Oliver good old days.” we figured, ‘We’ve done it be- nau bargains with Schreck; if he abstains authenticity and reality. As Murnau med- Wood and bassist Chris Long fore; we’ll do it again and put from his vampire urges during produc- itates on the power of the camera to give crossed paths in 1994. Wood Oliver Wood it out ourselves,’” he said, re- tion, Murnau will hand his lead actress life, the question of reality-based enter- was touring with blues gui- King Johnson ferring to the way in which to the vampire upon completion of the tainment is addressed. In a time when tarist Tinsley Ellis, while Long tthey handled their first two film. But when Schreck has trouble sup- The Real World and Survivor are popular had written for Delbert Mc- albums. pressing these urges, the film crew suf- television fare, this film comments on Clinton and Francine Reed. enough to meet Marcus.” “There are a lot of advan- fers. The plot builds until Murnau is modern times while being set in the 1920’s. Soon after their first meeting, Their latest album, Luck tages to putting albums out chasing his vision of authenticity to in- Entertaining and thought provoking, Shad- they decided to strike out their So Strange, benefits greatly from yourself…There’s a piece of the ordinate lengths. ow of the Vampire is well deserving of any own, but they needed some- the members’ individual in- pie that you save,” Wood con- The film works remarkably well on accolades it receives. one to cover rhythm. Enter fluences. Early jazz elements tinued. “On the other hand, drummer Greg Baba, who bubble up when Mewherter it would be nice to sign a record turned up at a Northside Tav- hoists his tuba—frequently deal with a really competent, ern jam session the same night used as a bass by the first New established company that’s as the pair later that year. Orleans bands—and later worth your while. There are King Johnson was born as pitches his trombone against so many new labels that come a blues-rock trio, and the 1995 James’ clarinet for a little Dix- and go.” debut Cats and Dogs reflected ieland revival. For a local band taking care those roots. By the time they But the five have more mod- of its own album sales, King released their self-titled follow- ern ground to cover; they fast- Johnson has built up an im- up in 1998, however, they were forward into surf, honky-tonk, pressive little resume that in- already starting to extend their funk, straight-up rock, Latin, cludes shows with the likes of reach a bit thanks to the addi- and the occasional flipped-out Hampton, the Funky Meters, tion of Adam Mewherter answering machine message. and Gov’t Mule. They’ve also (trombone, tuba) and Mar- (The voice that keeps yelling shaken up the stage at the At- By Jean-Paul Kieffer / LIONS GATE FILMS cus James (saxophone, clari- about buying a broken-down In Shadow of the Vampire, Max Schreck (WiIlem Dafoe) is a vampire starring as net, flute, keyboards). tractor belongs to none other See King Johnson, page 22 the infamous Dracula in F.W. Murnau’s (John Malkovich) 1921 German silent film. 22 • Friday, January 19, 2001 • Technique ENTERTAINMENT
of music they make, by the way King Johnson from page 21 they’ve succeeded. It’s kind of amaz- ing that a band with no guitar and lanta Dogwood Festival and the and so on. Even the old New Or- no singer, that’s really more of a jazz Atlantis Music Conference, as well leans style is emerging once again, instrumental band, has reached that as various festivals around the South- assisted by brass bands (Rebirth, kind of popularity. Somebody real- east—“just about everything except Dirty Dozen) that blend it with ly took the patience to listen; they Music Midtown,” Wood noted. modern grooves and improvising. didn’t need to hear vocals.” “We’ve tried every year to get “I guess it’s common for us to Then again, sometimes bands into that, but this is the year we’re reach back to the music of the good move up the ladder because they going to get in,” he predicted. Aus- old days…When I was young and have someone on board who knows tin’s South by Southwest confer- listening to, for instance, Stevie Ray how to make people want a piece of ence is the group’s other big target Vaughn, what was really interest- the action, whether or not the ma- for this year. ing was reading about him and learn- terial is actually any good. This bit Wherever King Johnson goes on, ing: why did he sound like that? It of reality often stacks the deck against there’s no denying that they draw was even more interesting to go back fledgling groups that can’t afford to liberally on styles that first emerged and check out Albert King, B. B. hire a manager or consultant yet. Courtesy of Brian Cooley / WICKED GROUP before its members were born. None King, the people he listened to.” Wood said, “We haven’t really King Johnson (Oliver Wood, Greg Baba, Adam Mewherter, Chris Long, of them are looking for an over- Help sometimes comes from gotten to where we’re selling our- Marcus James) will jazz up Smith’s at ttheir CD release party Sunday. hyped retro craze to milk dry, though. sources a little closer to home—like selves in any big way other than ly feel successful in a way already, attention—you might learn something. Wood believes that a more authen- the immediate family. Wood’s broth- trying to make good music, which even though it has not translated tic resurgence grows because of where er Chris plays bass for Medeski Mar- is probably our fault.” The chal- into cash or recognition. I definite- King Johnson will be performing at today’s musicians learned their craft. tin & Wood, a rhythm trio that has lenge for them is to find a good ly feel very content musically, and I Smith’s Olde Bar on January 21 to The grassroots popularity of jam been mixing improvisational jams person to handle the dirty work, while feel that’s the most important thing.” celebrate the release of their new al- groups such as Widespread Panic with funk and fusion since 1992. not going broke at the same time. What’s important for listeners is bum, Luck So Strange. Call (404) and Phish, he asserted, has led their “I love my brother’s band and His main goal for now has little that they get a fast ride through a 875-1522 for more information, or fans back to some of those acts’ what they do. Our band has been to do with the bottom line, though. century of blues, jazz, and nearly visit the band online at influences—blues, jazz, funk, soul, inspired by that one, by what kind “I’m enjoying it so much that I real- everything that grew out of them. Pay www.kingjohnson.com.
technique
MEETINGS: 7:00PM TUESDAYS PLACE: STUDENT SERVICES ROOM 137 PIZZA: FREE FREE FREE
Ah, Technique deadline, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways... ENTERTAINMENT Technique • Friday, January 19, 2001 • 23 Crossword DoubleTalk author Rudner 44. Pepper, et al? Snatch from page 21 1234 567 45. “Poppycock!” 46. Wildebeest them as the film progresses, Snatch swagger and is costumed in the same 8 9 10 11 12 47. Empty set (abbr) goes the other route and gives the thrift-store chic clothing that he wore 48. It comes before :// audience many characters but de- in Fight Club. What worked in Fight 13 14 15 velops none. This is unfortunate Club, has grown a little old in Snatch. DOWN because several characters seem to Also hurting this movie is its bru- 16 17 18 1. _____ Kosh… be very interesting, and the two most tality. Several people are tortured, intriguing get killed after only very many are murdered (most with shot- 19 20 2. Kipling character 3. Smelly brief encounters with the audience. guns), and there is a lengthy discus- 21 22 23 24 25 26 4. Polite double speak? (2 wds) Another thing that troubled me sion on the best way to dispose of 5. Stalk about Snatch was the familiarity of bodies. Overall, these elements make 27 28 29 6. Had multiple strokes? some of the characters. Vinnie Jones, the movie hard to truly enjoy for its 7. Estrogen, e.g. who plays Bul- many comedic 30 31 32 10. River City’s Trouble let Tooth Tony, bits. The film is 11. Game show buy, perhaps (2 is basically play- Snatch is an attempt edited—espe- 33 34 wds) ing the same cially in the 12. Cracked rival character he at creating an epic opening se- 35 36 37 38 17. “Dude!” played in Lock, movie with a cast of quence—to cut 18. Band job Stock, and Two between scenes 39 40 41 42 43 21. Jet (abbr) Smoking Barrels stars and complicated at breakneck without the sim- speeds and can 44 45 46 22. Famous Baba story. To see this done 23. Anger ilarly dressed son, be very nause- 47 48 24. Prof’s pre-test double talk? (2 the humanity, or well, go see Traffic. ating, especial- wds) the screen time ly when you try 25. Ken’s neighbor? of that role. Brad to read the text By Kit FitzSimons 21. He filets souls 26. Pig pen Pitt’s performance is an abomina- rapidly flashing onto the screen. It’s a double-crossword! 23. Gerund ender 28. I Don’t Know where? (2 wds) tion of bad acting. Ritchie thought Overall, this movie is not bad, 24. Lois’ love, et al. 29. Funnies’ double talk? it would be cute to make a running but when taken with its predecessor ACROSS 27. Like jerky Jim? 31. Singer Yoko joke out of the fact that Pitt’s ac- in mind, it doesn’t pay off. It lacks 1. So-so 28. Mined find 32. Bad ER condition (abbr) cent, a blend of Irish and British, is the first’s warmth, humor, and sense 5. Librarian double talk? 29. N’est pas, to Bubba-Joe Bob 33. Dropper’s double talk? incomprehensible. A bit of advice of embarrassed wonder. This film is 8. Be the dad 30. Spasm 35. Like McDonald’s? to any burgeoning filmmakers read- not only an attempt to insert a mes- 9. Double talk necessity? 31. The loneliest number 36. Dinghy rod ing this—don’t do something like sage into a formula that director 10. Non-stick spray 32. Swell 37. Soon this. Giving an international super- Guy Ritchie seems bent on follow- 13. MD gps. 33. Can. Province 38. Throw in one’s chips, perhaps star a whole film’s worth of unintel- ing, but is also a bad attempt at 14. Van Gogh’s loss 34. Word before cake or meal 42. Famous king ligible dialogue may seem like an creating an epic movie with a bloat- 15. ______tangent 35. July 4th double talk? (2 wds) 43. Death of a Cleo? edgy thing to do, but it comes off as ed cast of stars and complicated sto- 16. Campbell’s double talk? (3 wds) 39. Run circles around annoying. The fact that Pitt’s role is ry. To see this done well, go see 19. Traveler’s double talk? (abbr) 40. Hostel Welcome back to the crossword. Yay pivotal to the film doesn’t help things Traffic. Hopefully, Snatch will be a 20. Texas tea 41. “Naked Beneath My Clothes” yay. You’ll find answers on page 18. either. And Mickey, as acted by Pitt, stepping-stone between good mov- is a gypsy version of Tyler Durden, ies for Guy Ritchie, and he can re- New year, new movies, new music. Join Entertainment staff! Pitt’s character in the infinitely bet- capture the energy that made his ter Fight Club. He has the same directorial debut so good.
1) Daniel wanting my sister. (I wonder if we should tell Virginia?) 24 • Friday, January 19, 2001 • Technique ENTERTAINMENT ...01010101101010 10101010101010101010101010...... Two Bits Sure, you may have come to ex- off when you graduate, assuming good by comparison. ature. Your romantic prospects are consultant, thank you very much. pect my extensive genius to take the that we still have an economy by Management—Gemini (The somewhat mixed. Since you are sur- Fortunately for you, love is in the form of sage ramblings of technical then. In relationships you attempt Twins), May 22-June 21: Gemini rounded by, for lack of a better term, stars. With classes that are demo- wisdom; however, you should real- to be the dominant partner, but gets a bad rap for being two-faced geeks, you should be desirable. Un- graphically consistent with ize that the Two Bits Man does your significant other reminds you and devious. You’ve turned this into fortunately, you are surrounded by U[sic]GA, you’re doing better than have a softer side—just like Sears, of what a dork you really are and an advantage. You adjust to the fickle geeks who don’t know any better. the rest of us. However, your signif- but I don’t sell dishwashers. Yes, I slaps you back into place. whims of management theory as The odds are good but the goods icant others might not be as recep- do enjoy pondering the deeper fac- Civil Engineering—Taurus easily as most people change their are odd. Satisfy your romantic thirsts tive to your Total Quality ets of philosophy and mysticism. (The Bull), April 21-May 21: You’re socks. Your romantic future is pos- with a good Victorian bodice rip- Management initiative and stream- This week, I delve into the celestial more than just the station wagon itive since the traits that make a per and sneak over to Georgia State. lined processes in the boudoir. world and bring you the Two Bits that soccer moms drove before SUVs good manager (like lying and de- Industrial Engineer—Leo (The Computer Science—Virgo (The Majors Horoscope. conquered the road. You’re stable, ception) have proven beneficial in Lion), July 23-August 22: You were Virgin), August 23-September 23: Electrical Engineering—Aries reliable, and probably reinforced with attracting and maintaining a mate. the kid in preschool that put every- You are meticulous and detail-ori- (The Ram), March 21-April 20: concrete. Odds are, you are more You also stand a better-than-even thing back in its proper place and ented. Since you’re a perfectionist, You’re a geek, and you really don’t stable than the bridge you designed chance of graduating before you pass made sure everyone else darn well computer science is the ideal major care. It amuses you that you can for your senior project. We appre- your sexual peak. did so too. Those little snots knew for you. You aspire to be God, but solve Karnaugh maps in your sleep. ciate your determination and per- STAC—Cancer (The Crab), the fury of your teeth. Naturally since that position has been filled No, frankly it doesn’t. You got into severance. We just hope you June 22-July 22: You realized too you chose a major where you get and there are no vacancies expect- this major because you wanted to remembered to carry the two when late that you didn’t really want to be paid a lot of money to tell people ed, you settle for creating artificial make the big bucks, and you’re too you were designing that last high- an engineer. Unfortunately, you where to put their toys (and their worlds. It thrills you to no end that stubborn to get out now that you way overpass. In love, you will do couldn’t bear to transfer out of Ma southeastern regional distribution you can create a little world, create have been in college for a few years. better than most other signs be- Tech, so you changed to STAC, center) and why this is the only all the rules of the world, and de- Another six, and you might actual- cause you’re across the street from although you really want to go to statistically valid way to do things ly get out! Your persistence will pay the College of Computing, and look Vassar and study Elizabethan liter- and yes, of course I am right, I am a See Two Bits, page 27 , BUILDING
REE ERVICES UESDAYS F T S 137 REE PM F OOM TUDENT REE R : 7:00 :S :F EETINGS LACE IZZA M P P
Get Some
2) Chris making strange “puh-shah” utterances. ENTERTAINMENT Technique • Friday, January 19, 2001 • 25
‘Dragon’ a lush martial arts epic New year, new bands, new noise By Joseph Jeong and comics, I guess I am more fa- in every scene. As Yu Shu Lien, Li CJ’S LANDING (270 Buckhead Ave.) 1/21—Pietasters, Skatamatic Weapons, Crazy journalism, man, cra-a-azy miliar with this genre than the lay- Mu Bai’s love interest, Michelle Yeoh (404) 237-7657 Rocket 350, Criminal Ways man. Perhaps my expectations of definitely shows that she’s more than 1/19—Tin Roof, Jeniphoria 1/25—Some Young Guy, Self Motivational MPAA Rating: PG-13 the storyline was a little too high. just the female action star seen op- 1/20—Lickety Split, Ethan and the Ewox Speaker, Blue Druids, Truth or Treason Starring: Chow Yun-Fat, Michelle It’s a relatively simple story of posite Pierce Brosnan in Tomorrow 1/24—Brighter Shade, Radiant Tribe, Remi 1/26—Ghoul Town, 101, Striknine, “Wailin’” Yeoh, Ziyi Zhang, Chen Chang finding the right balance between Never Dies. 1/25—Homemade Jam William Sparks, Jerry Only Director: Ang Lee professional responsibility and per- Writer: Yes. Zhang Ziyi also turns 1/26—Drifting Through Web site: www.masq.com Studio: Sony Pictures Classics sonal desires told through the lives in a brilliant performance in per- Web site: www.cjslanding.com Running Time: 120 minutes of four people. It’s not a wonder haps the hardest role in the movie, ROXY (3110 Roswell Rd.) Language: Chinese (with English Ang Lee and screenplay writer James Jen Long. She is equally convincing COTTON CLUB (152 Luckie St.) (404) 233-7699 (404) 874-1993 1/20—SR71, Nine Days, American Hi-Fi subtitles) Schamus call this a kind of Sense as the spoiled brat early in the mov- yyyy 1/19—Vinyl, Modern Hero, Sick Speed, Superbs 1/23—Cheap Trick, Harmony Riley Rating: and Sensibility with martial arts. What ie and as a more mature lady in the 1/20—Left Front Tire, Diffuser, Grand Theft Web site: www.atlantaconcerts.com/roxy.asp did you like most about the movie? end. Audio, Pyrite [Closing credits and theme song Artist: The fight scenes, of course! Chang Chen also does admira- 1/26—Meat Puppets, Damnations TX SMITH’S OLDE BAR (1574 Piedmont Ave.) of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Drag- To be honest, I watched this more bly as Jen Long’s love, Lo. It was Web site: www.atlantaconcerts.com/cottonclub.asp (404) 875-1522 on is heard] for Yuen Wo-Ping’s martial arts also nice to see a legend like Cheng 1/19—John Mayer, Rodney and Michael, [Music fades and the curtain is choreography than Ang Lee’s di- Pei Pei, who was very famous in the DARK HORSE TAVERN (816 N. Highland Ave.) Tift Merritt raised] rectorial talents or any of the actors 60s, grace the screen as the movie’s (404) 873-3607 1/20—Big Ass Truck, Bradley Cole Smith 1/19—Persona, Favorite, Sparkledrive 1/21—King Johnson, Loveless [Two people enter from the left] involved in the movie. villian, Jade Fox. 1/20—Tommy Thompson, Jason Marcum Band 1/22—Echo 7, Suburban Love Junkies, [Lights] Frankly, I was plesantly surprised Artist: Are you sure you’re not 1/24—Arrant, Velure, Sipja Cuadro Flamenco Narrator: A writer and an artist despite my already high expecta- going to say anything about the iro- 1/25—Tilden’s Faith, Paul Sforza Band 1/23—Apartment Projects have just finished watching the pre- tions. The fight sequences were more ny that a Taiwanese director like 1/26—Billionaire, Rev 7, Presence 1/24—Tantric, Something 5, Travisty Theory view of Ang Lee’s latest movie, fluid than fast-paced, more beauti- Ang Lee keeps making movies with 1/25—Tender Idols, Metroscene, Wayne Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. ful than brutal, and more harmoni- some of the strongest female roles ECHO LOUNGE (551 Flat Shoals Ave.) 1/26—Blue Dogs, Heritage Cherry Tired of arguing about why the up- ous than heart-stopping. I thought out there? (404) 681-3600 Web site: smithsoldebar.citysearch.com coming year is truly the beginning they blended beautifully with the Writer:
3) Sharky being liberated from the trunk of the dented Nissan, once again free to “o-fish-iate” events. 26 • Friday, January 19, 2001 • Technique ENTERTAINMENT
Kennedys and Bill Clinton. You ed to build a spacecraft that would you designed work, at least most of rected any time soon. Romantically Two Bits from page 24 might, however, want to avoid be- take humankind off Mother Earth the time. The maxim “Civil Engi- your prospects are limited because coming an intern. and make us truly a space-faring neers build targets, Mechanical En- you get thrown off by the “1 + 1 = 3" stroy it on a whim. The sun is in Physics—Scorpio (The Scorpi- people, but your job requires you to gineers build weapons” warms your billboard on Peachtree Street. No, your sign this month, so you need on), October 24-November 22: build weapons. You also chose a heart in an odd way. Romantically this is not true even for large values to stay in the basement of the CoC. You’re well on your way to becom- major that is heavily dependent on you are a late bloomer. As a student of 1. You do, however, have the Romantically you are flatlining. The ing a mad scientist. You were voted which lobbyist has which senator in you might not be the hub of your dark and mysterious thing going only thing keeping you warm at “Most Likely to Hatch an Evil his pocket. Be social circle, for you. This is an advantage. night is the glow of Scheme” in high school even though prepared for you will do Psychology—Pisces (The Fish), lara_croft_striptease.mpg off your you really wanted “Mr. Congenial- frequent Aerospace Engineering: much better February 20-March 20: You are in 21" monitor. On the bright side, ity.” You wanted to build a warp changes. For- You wanted to build when you can touch with your feelings. Specifi- when you eventually graduate, you drive for your senior research project, tunately you charge $150 cally, you were very in touch with will make an obscene amount of but after failing that, you will settle are adaptable. spacecraft that would per hour as a your feelings the day you were shafted money and control companies, and for making something that causes a Romantically make us a space-faring consultant. and realized that you should proba- there are always people willing to really cool explosion. Romantically you have de- After all, peo- bly look at career options other than put up with anything for this. Look you have the best prospects of any cent prospects people, but your job ple will want engineering. While a part of you at Bill Gates. He’s married, and you major at this school. You are dark because you requires you to build you for your enjoys plumbing the depths of the know it wasn’t for his looks. and mysterious, and anyone who can truthfully money. You’ll mind, a part of you takes a secret Political Science—Libra (The has watched a soap opera knows say “Why yes, weapons. also excel be- pleasure in acting a bit silly just to Scales), September 24-October 23: that dark and mysterious people do I AM a rocket cause you’re make your roommate think you are You like being in the thick of things. well romantically. Invest in an eye scientist” in stable and sup- conducting a bizarre experiment on Now is the time to watch your fi- patch and remember: accessorize! bars. It has to be good for some- portive. Sucks to be compared to a her. May I suggest rearranging the nances because the moon is moving Check the Coach outlet for specials thing. structural beam, doesn’t it? furniture to make a maze? You could into an awkward state; with student on matching eye patches and gloves. Mechanical Engineering—Cap- Math—Aquarius (The Water put all your roommate’s textbooks loans and $26,000 salaries, there If you are lucky, you will be caught ricorn (The Goat), December 22- Carrier), January 21-February 19: in the center in order to give her an won’t be a Lexus in your immediate up in international intrigue and get January 20: You’re exceedingly down You like the honesty and purity of incentive to perform well. Roman- future. But if you persevere, your to hang out with Bond girls or for- to earth and practical. You like work- numbers. The happiest day of your tically you have the upper hand be- bank account will shame your engi- eign hunks until the super spy du ing with your hands and building life was when you went to http:// cause you can read your potential neering counterparts, especially when jour unfoils your nefarious plot. things. Naturally, you chose a ma- www.facade.com/legacy/amiinpi and date’s body language. This could you get a book deal after being caught Aerospace Engineering—Sagit- jor where you design things that found out that your birthday did in save you hours of time and loads of in your first major scandal. While tarius (The Archer), November 23- other people build. If you’re lucky, fact occur in pi. You like working humiliating rejection by diverting romance in college may be slow, December 21: You’re overly they might let you on the produc- alone, which is a good thing since your focus from those you repel. you have a positive future. Just look optimistic to a fault. You chose aero- tion floor once or twice. You get the tag team mathematics failed miser- The hypnosis lab will be a great how things turned out for the space engineering because you want- satisfaction of watching something ably, and is not likely to be resur- boon in this regard.
ADVERTISING CLASSIFIEDS to place classified advertisement go to:
Delivery Drivers/Kitchen PT. Be Your Own Boss, set your own Veterinary Assistant Wanted the island at one of eight resorts(your FOR RENT Staff hours, work around your own schedule, Veterinary Assistant wanted for a small choice)Plus Round-trip luxury cruise with existing job or obligations. CALL 770- food. Appalachia Travel! 1-800-867- HOUSE FOR RENT All Star Pizza (located in Office Depot animal practice in the Midtown area. 674-5426 Flexible Hours. (4)352-8353 or fax 5018 www.BahamaSun.com 1 mile from TECH 2/1 bedroom NEW Shopping Center on 14th St) is hiring (4)351-5080 central heat/air, w/d hardwood floors pizza makers, delivery drivers, and The Taco Stand Buckhead Need room for Chinese large kitchen large livingroom high phone help. Flexible hours, full or part Taco Stand is now hiring servers for Scholar ceilings big fenced-in yard. Available time. Call Rich 770-778-2958 nights and weekends. Fun environment FOR SALE Need room for Chinese visiting scholar Feb. 1st $1,200. month 404)794- ERRAND RUNNER and flexible hours. Apply in person beginning January 2001 within walking At 3279 Roswell Rd. or call. 404 995 1992 Nissan NX2000 4447 HELP NEW MOM WITH ERRANDS distance of Georgia Tech Campus. 0307 , two-door, “T” top, 5-speed, spoiler, Call 404-894-6846 IN BUCKHEAD AREA. 5-7 HOURS A AC/ PS/ PB/ PW/ Cruise control, HELP WANTED WEEK @ $10/HR.FLEXIBLE HOURS. TUTORS WANTED Alpine CD player/radio, under 99,000 DANCERS & D.J.’S Wanted Would you like to: Earn up to $25 per $$9 TO $$10 PER HOUR PLUS CALL 404-603-8152 TO APPLY miles, excellent condition, $4,200. Call for professional entertainment company. hour. Work 2 to 10hr/week right here (770) 926-6300 High energy, dependable & motivating. TIPS Fitness Instructor on campus. Help people understand No adult entertainment! Flexible Scheduling. Elite Parking Lead & instruct classes. Pays $8-$10 their course-work. If so, we want to www.ContagiousEnt.com Call Alyson Systems Call 404-892-1234 for each 30-50 minute class at local hear from you! www.tutor-union.com MISCELLANEOUS @ (404)497-9177 pre-schools. Allows for flexible part- Simply English time schedule. Will train. Call Julie GREAT OPPORTUNITY - CRIMINAL DEFENSE Offering TOEFL prep/ editing/private (770) 650-2063 Develope a state-of-the-art website, ATTORNEY File clerk 18hrs/wk $8.00/ use it as a class project, and GET or small group ESL/ 404 588 0488 [email protected] Sean McIlhinney. Experienced, hr INTERNET COMPANY PAID!! We are looking for an Affordable. Free consultation. 24/hr. Hrs: 3pm-7:30pm MWThF Filing/Pulling Silicon Valley Based. Seeking Help experienced Web Developer for new BAHAMA SPRING BREAK hotline 404-932-3099. O:404-321- Now! Incredible Earnings, with records, assisting front desk, misc tasks. cyber business. Able to furnish $189.00 5-Days or $239.00 7-Days. 7733. [email protected] Unlimited Feature. Earn $300- 900+ Typing skills preferred. Contact: Susan references and start work ASAP. Pay Prices Include: Accommodations on www.seanmac.com @ 404 874 9606 in one day, if you have the talent. FT/ negotiable. Call (404) 351-3378
4) Mental images of Jody holding the coffee pot, fanning Carter, and singing the Old Navy item of the week song.