INT. SUPERDOME - NIGHT SUPERIMPOSE: SEPTEMBER 9, 2010, 8:00 P.M. Opening night in the Superdome. Favre has yet to report to the Vikings. TAVARIS JACKSON is warming up on the field, thirty minutes before kickoff. RICH EISEN reports breaking news that Favre has been spotted in a vehicle on his way to the stadium. WARREN SAPP makes one of his usual crazy faces.
EXT. LOUISIANA HIGHWAY - CONTINUOUS HELICOPTERS spot a WHITE BRONCO carrying what is believed to be Brett Favre and his wife Deanna, speeding towards the stadium.
INT. ESPN STUDIO - MOMENTS LATER CHRIS BERMAN and TOM JACKSON share a bottle of champagne. CRIS CARTER has his usual sour-puss expression on. CRIS CARTER (disappointed) I told ya'll he'd come back. This is Brett FAHRVA we're talking about. Okay?
INT. JOE BUCK'S HOME - CONTINUOUS JOE BUCK and TROY AIKMAN are huddled together on the couch in front of a large TV. They are only wearing underwear. JOE BUCK The man just loves his football, Troy. TROY AIKMAN Not as much as I love you, Joe. They share an epic gay kiss.
INT. MADDEN BUS, SOMEWHERE IN AMERICA - MOMENTS LATER
JOHN MADDEN is eating a big bag of popcorn, anticipating the new NFL season. After hearing the Favre news, he gets very excited. 2.
JOHN MADDEN Virginia! Go get the Vaseline! It's going to be a good night after all! Brett Favre is coming back! His wife takes a drag from her cigarette. She looks suicidal.
INT. SUPERDOME - 8:25 P.M. The championship banner is raised for the city of New Orleans to enjoy. The national anthem is sung by some American Idol CAST-OFF. CAST-OFF (singing) "And the hooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmeeee, oooooooooooooooooooooooofffffff, thhhhhhhheeeeee, braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-aaaa-vvvv- aaaaa-vvvv-eee-aaa--brave" DREW BREES wipes a tear off his birthmark.
EXT. SUPERDOME - CONTINUOUS Brett Favre is walking to the Superdome entrance, putting on his pads and gear as fans swarm him, impeding his progress only a little.
INT. SUPERDOME - CONTINUOUS CLOSE ON Steve Mariucci. Mooch can't hold back the tears. STEVE MARIUCCI (fired up) If Brett can get on the field in time to keep his streak alive, you better believe he'll do it. He has such heart and love for the game. He may throw nine interceptions tonight since he hasn't practiced with the team all year, but they'll love what he brings to the team. DEION SANDERS (huge grin) Ladies and gentlemen, the one, the only, Brett Favre has returned to the NFL. Now, we can get this season started. Prime out. 3.
RICH EISEN And there you have it folks. What more can be said? We've been on the air for fourteen straight hours, and it's finally game time. Brett Favre in the house. Enjoy.
INT. SUPERDOME - 8:30 P.M. Hartley kicks the ball off and the game is under way. Percy Harvin returns the ball to the Viking 28 yard line. Tavaris Jackson takes his last instructions from BRAD CHILDRESS.
INT. SUPERDOME, TUNNEL - CONTINUOUS Favre, all ready to go, runs down the tunnel to get out on the field.
INT. SUPERDOME, FIELD - CONTINUOUS Jackson is just about to run to the huddle when... AL MICHAELS (O.S.) Jackson to start the game. And down on the field, there is Favre! Favre reaches the field and tackles Tavaris Jackson from behind. AL MICHAELS (O.S.) (CONT’D) And he tackles Jackson, his own teammate! Wow! CRIS COLLINSWORTH (O.S.) Ohhhh boy. There's just that extra bit of excitement that only Brett Favre can bring to a game. BRETT FAVRE (to Jackson) Sorry TJ, I'll take you fishing sometime or something. Jackson is planted on the field in disbelief. He looks up at the SIDELINE JUDGE. SIDELINE JUDGE (to Jackson) You just got Favre'd, boy! 4.
The defense watches from the sideline. JARED ALLEN is especially pumped up. JARED ALLEN Damn, you guys better watch me tonight. I'm so jacked right now I might get a DUI later! CHAD GREENWAY You mean another DUI? JARED ALLEN (sternly) Watch your mouth. Meanwhile Favre lines up and hands the ball to Adrian Peterson on the game's first play. The streak is intact. Things are basically back to normal.
EPILOGUE
INT. SUPERDOME, BOOTH - MIDNIGHT Michaels and Collinsworth wrap up the game. AL MICHAELS Well Cris, the Saints open up the 2010 NFL season with a convincing 63-17 victory. Brett Favre, shocking everyone, ran on the field just as the game was set to start and threw Tavaris Jackson out of the way to start his 286th consecutive game. How do you think he looked? CRIS COLLINSWORTH Yeah, well, it's hard to start a game when you haven't practiced with the team since January. Brett went on to throw nine interceptions tonight, but I have never seen another player have this much fun playing the game of football than what I saw tonight. Really incredible to watch this all play out. 5.
AL MICHAELS Indeed. With a little more practice, Favre should get things rolling again in Minnesota this year. Well partner, it's been a heck of a start to the season. Looking forward to more Favre in 2010? CRIS COLLINSWORTH (excited in a very Collinsworth way) You don't even have to ask me to know what I'm going to say! I wish we did Favre games every week. This is just another addition to his unbelievable legacy. I hope I'm here in 2020 with you and we're still watching Favre. AL MICHAELS (very serious) Well, I’ll probably be dead by then. (long pause) From New Orleans, the final score: Saints 63, Favre 17. Thanks for watching.