Imago Relationship Theory and Therapy
[email protected] Imago Relationship Therapy • It is a theory and a therapy of committed partnership. • Major thesis is that the purpose of the unconscious, in choosing a romantic partner, is to finish childhood. • Partner selection is the result of an unconscious match between a mental image of one’s parents/caregivers created in childhood (referred to as the Imago) and certain character traits of the attractive partner.
[email protected] Imago Relationship Theory • The Imago match is the determining factor in selection because it is driven by the unconscious purpose of recovering wholeness by restoring connection which was ruptured in childhood by need frustration. • Romantic love, at one level, is the result of anticipated need satisfaction. • Romantic feelings diminish and the power struggle ensues.
[email protected] Imago Relationship Therapy • Cooperate with the unconscious by creating a conscious committed partnership in which the couple intentionally meets each others unmet childhood needs. • Imago therapist use as their primary intervention a 3 stage structured process called the Couples Dialogue.
[email protected] Imago…as relationship therapy • Couples learn specific skills and effective tools • Move from reactivity to intentionality • Creates safety and intimacy • Renew the love, passion, and potential of the relationship
[email protected] Stages of an unconscious relationship Passion Expectations Attraction Disillusionment Attachment Frustration Illusion Anger/Fear Ecstasy Impasse