S A TA N ’ S D I A R Y

B O N I A N D L I V E G H T P U B L I SH ER S NEW Y O R !

PREFACE

’ ” ’ ATAN d s t S DIARY, Leonid An reyev las ork a w , was completed by the great Russian S i few days before he died n Finland , in Sep 1 91 9 tember, . But a few years ago the most pop ular and successful of Russian writers , Andreyev ad l died almost penniless , a s , tragic figure , disi l i e - us on d, broken hearted over the tragedy of

Russia . A year ago Leonid Andreyev wrote me that h e was eager to come to America , to study this coun try and familiarize Americans with the fate of hi s unfortunate countrymen . I arranged for his visit hi to this country and informed him of t s by cable . But on the very day I sent my cable the s ad news came from Finland announcin g that Leonid An e dr yev died of heart failure . In “ Satan ’ s Diary ” Andreyev summed up his boundless disillusionment i n an absorbing satire e on human life . F arlessly and mercilessly he hurled the falsehoods and hypocrisies into th e face of life . He portrayed Satan coming to this earth to amuse himself and play. Having as

- sumed the form of an American multi millionaire , Satan s et out on a tour through Europe m quest of amusement and adventure . Before him passed m various for s of spurious virtues, hypocrisies , the ruthless cruelty of man and the often deceptive

innocence of woman . Within a short time Satan

finds himself outwitted , deceived , relieved of his e his millions , mocked , humiliated , b aten by man in

own devilish devices . ’ The story of An dreyev s beginning as a writer is best told in his autobiography which he gave 1 08 me in 9 .

” “ I l 1 871 and was born , he said , in Oryo , in ,

studied there at the gymnasium . I studied poor ly ; while in the seventh class I was for a whole n year known as the worst student , a d my mark

4 3. for conduct was never higher than , sometimes

The most pleasant time I spent at school , which

I recall to this day with pleasure , was recess time d a between lessons , an also the rare occ sions when sun I was sent out from the classroom . The beams , the free sunbeams , which penetrated some cleft and which playe d with the dust in the hall — i s o s o s o way all th s was mysterious , interesting, full of a peculiar , hidden meaning . ‘ When I studied at the gymnasium my father , an engineer, died . As a university student I was in dire need . During—my first course in St . Peters burg I even starved not s o much out of real n e es sit c y as because of my youth , inexperience , and ' my inability to utilize the unnecessary parts o f

u . my cost me . I am to this day ashamed to think that I went two days without food at a time when I had two or three pairs of trousers and two over coats which I could have sold . V1 It was then that I wrote my first story—about

a starving student . I cried when I wrote it , and

the editor, who returned my manuscript , laughed .

That sto ry of mine remained unpublished . 1 894 at In , in January, I made an unsuccessful

tempt to kill myself by shooting. As a result of this unsuccessful attempt I was forced by the au h riti t o e s into religious penitence , and I contracted heart trouble , though not of a serious nature , yet very annoying. During this time I made one or two unsuccessful attempts at writing ; I devoted myself with greater pleasure and success to paint ing, which I loved from childhood on . I made por traits to order at 3 and 5 r ubles a piece . “ In 1 897 I received my diploma and became an

assistant attorney, but I was at the very outset f h sidetracked . I was o fered a position on T e Cou rier t , for which I was to report cour proceed ings . I did not succeed in getting any practice s as a lawyer . I had only one ca e and lost it at every point . “ 1 898 — In — I wrote my first story for the Easter number and since that time I have devoted my self exclusively to literature . Maxim Gorky helped me considerably in my literary work by ” . c his always practical advi e and suggestions .

’ Andreyev s first steps in literature , his first short stories , attracted but little attention at the time of their appearance . It was only when Coun tess Tolstoy, the wife of Leo Tolstoy, in a letter “ No vo e Vrem a to the y y , came out in defense of artistic purity and moral power in contemporary ” d l i u t i literature , ec ar ng that R ssian socie y, n stead of buying, reading and making famous the l “ i works of the Andreyevs , shou d r se against ” such filth with indignation , that almost every body who knew how to read in Russia turned to the little volume of the young writer . a C t In her att ck upon Andreyev, oun ess Tolstoy s aid as follows

t An The poor new wri ers , like dreyev, suc ceede d only in concentrating their attention on the filthy point of human degradation and uttered a

l - cry to th e undeveloped, ha f intelligent reading an d public, inviting them to see to examine the decomposed corpse of human degradation and to ’ close their eyes to God s wonderful, vast world , wi with the beauties of nature, th the majesty of i e um art , w th the lofty y arnings of the h an soul, with the re ligious and m—oral struggles and the great ideals of goodnes s even with the down fall, misfortunes and weaknesses of such people as Dostoyevsky depicted . In describing all these eve ry true artist should illumine clearly b e n ot fore humanity the side of filth and vice , but should stru ggle against them by illumining the highest ideals of good , truth , and the triumph over s evil , weakne s , and the vices of mankind . should like to cry out loudly to the whole world in order to help those unfortunate people whose wings , given to each of them for high flights to ward the understanding of the spiritual light , beauty, kindness , and God , are clipped by these ” Andreyevs . This letter of Countess Tolstoy called forth a i an a e s torm of protest n the Russi press , and , str ng h e s ex to s ay, t representatives of the fair were among the warmest defenders of the young au An i n thor . swering the attack, many women, the their letters to the press , pointed out that author of “ Anna Karenina ” had been abused in almost the same manner for his “ Kreutzer Son ” ata n d , a that Tolstoy himself had been accused of e xerting just s uch an influence as the Countess n attributed to A dreyev over the youth of Russia . Since the publication of Countess Tolstoy ’ s con demnation h as , Andreyev produced a serie s of “ m r Th e aste pieces , such as Life of Father Vas ” “ sily, a powerful psychological study ; Red “ Laughter, a war story, written with the blood ” “ ” of Russia ; The Life of Man , a striking mo “ ” ralit t y presen ation in five acts ; Anathema , his “ m Th e greatest dra a , and Seven Who Were ” l Hanged , in which the horrors of Russian ife un der the Tsar were delin eated with such beau n tiful simplicity a d power that Turgenev, or Tol h stoy himself, would have signed his name to t is masterpiece . Thus the first accusations against Andreyev w his ere disarmed by artistic productions , per meated with sincere , profound love for all that 1 3 pure in life . Dostoyevsky and Maupassant de “ icted e t p more subj c s , such as that treated in The ” Abyss , than Andreyev . But with them thes e stories are lost in the great mass of their other A works , while in ndreyev, who at that time had lx but fe r as yet produced a w short sto ies , works “ ” like The Abyss stood out in bold relief . I recall my first meeting with Leonid Andreyev

1 908 . a t in , two weeks fter my visit to Coun Leo n i Tolstoy at Yasnaya Polya a . At that t me he had

already become the most popular Russian writer, his popularity having overshadowed even that of

Maxim Gorky . ’ As I drove from Terioki to Andreyev s house , l d s t~ covere a ong the u d road , the stern and taciturn little Finnish driver suddenly broke the silence by saying to me in broken Russian “ Andreyev is a good writer . Although he

i . s a Russian , he is a very good man He is build n d ing a beautiful house here in Finland , a he ” gives employment to many of our people . We were soon at the gate of Andreyev ’ s beau — a u - tiful villa fantastic str cture , weird looking,

original in design, something like the conception “ ” of the architect in the Life of Man . My s on is out rowing with his wife in the ” ’ Gulf of Finland , Andreyev s mother told me .

They will be back in half an hour . As I waited I watched the seething activity ’ everywhere on Andreyev s estate . In Yasnaya

Polyana , the home of Count Tolstoy, everything

e - s e seemed long stablished , fixed , well regulated , ’ r enel y beautiful . Andreyev s estate was astir

w . ith vigorous life Young, strong men were

building the House of Man . More than thirty of

them were working on the roof and in the yard , an d a little distance away, in the meadows , young

n and - wome girls , bright eyed and red faced, were x t and haying. Youth , s rength , vigor everywhere , above all the ringing laughter of little children “ at play. I could see from the window the Black ” s un Little River, which Sparkled in the hundreds

of feet below . The constant noise of the work ’ men s axes and hammers was s o loud that I did not notice when Leonid Andreyev entered the

room where I was waiting for him . “ ” as Pardon my manner of dressing, he said , “ m we shook hands . In the sum er I lead a lazy

ri . life , and do not w te a line I am afraid I am ” forgetting even to sign my name . I had seen numerous photographs of Leonid

Andreyev, but he did not look like any of them .

- - Instead of a pale faced, sickly looking young man ,

there stood before me a strong, handsome, well built man , with wonderful eyes . He wore a gray

ish blouse , black, wide pantaloons up to his knees ,

and no shoes or stockings .

We soon spoke of Russian literature at the time , particularly of the drama . “ We have no real drama in Russia , said An “ dre e y v. Russia has not yet produced an ything

that could justly be called a great drama . Per ‘ ’ haps The Storm , by Ostrovsky, is the only Rus

sian play that may be classed as a drama . Tol ’ stoy s plays cannot be placed in this category . An k Of the later writers , ton Che hov came nearest

to giving real dramas to Russia , but , unfo rtu nz tel hi i , he was taken from us in the prime of s 1ét ’ y e . “ ‘ What do you consider your own Life of Man ’ ‘ and th e To I asked .

X1 The y ar e n ot dramas ; they are merely pre ” s entation s s o a c in m ny a ts , answered Andreyev, “ and , after some hesitation , added I have not i written any dramas , but it s possible that I will ” ’ write one . At this point Andreyev s wife came

d e . in , ress d in a Russian blouse The conversa c tion turned to America , and to the treatment a o corded t Maxim Gorky in New York . “ ” h wa hi A re W en I s a c ld I loved merica , “ An a marked dreyev . Perh ps Cooper and Mayne h Reid, my favorite authors in my child ood days , were responsible for this . I was always planning to run away to America . I am anxious even now —I ma to visit America, but I am afraid y get as ” bad a reception as my friend Gorky got . A He laughed as he glanced at his wife . fter a brief pause , he said “ Th e most remarkable thing about th e Gorky incident ! is that while in his stories and articles about Am erica Gorky wrote nothing but the very worst that could be said about that country he never told me anything but the very best about o wi ri America . S me day he ll probably desc be his impression s of Am e rica as he related them ” to me . a It was a very warm d y. The sun was burning Mme An mercilessly in the large room . . dreyev suggested that it would be more pleasant to go

down to a shady place near the Black Little River . On th e way down the hill Andreyev inquired ’ about Tolstoy s health and was eager to know r a t s his views on contempora y m t er . x1 1 If Tolstoy were young now he would have ” bee n with us, he said . A We stepped into a boat, Mme . ndreyev took up W con th e oars and began to row. e resumed our versation . “ The decadent movement in Ru ssian litera ” “ ture , said Andreyev, started to make itself felt about ten or fifteen years ago . At first it was ’ e hi . looked upon as mer c ld s play, as a curiosity l Now it is regarded more seriously. A though I o do not belong to that school, I do not c nsider i h as it worthless . The fault with t is that it but an d e few talented people in its ranks , thes few e direct the criti cism of the decad nt school . They An are the writers and also the critics . d they

a . pr ise whatever they write Of the younger men , Al exander Blok is perhaps the most gifted . But a in Russia our clothes change quickly now days , and it is hard to tell what the future will tell u s —in our literature and our life . “ ” How do I picture to myself this future ? con tinu ed Andreyev, in answer to a question of min e . I cannot know even the fate and future of my own child ; how can I foretell the future of such a great country as Russia ? But I believe that the Russian p eople have a great future before them

- — in life and in literature for they are a great

- people , rich in talents , kind and freedom loving.

Savage as yet , it is true , very ignorant,but on the whole they do not difier so much from oth i ” pean nat ons . Suddenly the author of “ Red Laughter ” looked “ upon me intently, and asked : How is it that th e

ml l 3 European and th e American press has ceased to interest itself in our struggle for emancipation ? Is it possible that the reaction in Russia appe als ’ to them more than our people s yearnings for freedom, simply because the reaction happens to e ? be stronger at the present tim In that event , they are probably sympathizing with the Shah of i l a - Persia Russi to day is a lunatic asylum . The people who are hanged are not the people wh o r s should be hanged . Eve ywhere else hone t peo r i n ple are at large and only c im nals are in priso . In Russia the honest people are in prison an d the rn criminals are at large . The Russian Gove ment s is compo sed of a band of criminals , and Nichola ll II is not the greatest of them . There are sti greater ones . I do not hold that the Russian Gov men e rn t alone is guilty of these horrors . The Eu r op ean nations and the Americans are just as m much to bla e , for they look on in silence while m the most despicable crimes are co mitted . The h as murderer usually at least courage , while he who looks on silently when murder is committed e is a contemptible weakling . England and Franc , o who have become s friendly to our Government , are surely watching with compassion the poor

Shah , who hangs the constitutional leaders . Per haps I do not know international law . Perhaps

I am not speaking as a practical man . One na tion must not interfere with the internal affairs of another nation . But why do they interfere with our movement for freedom ? France helped th e Russian Government in its war against the p eo r a als ple by giving money to Russia. Ge m ny o x w ' — - l t d countn es helped secretly. In well regu a e h a each individual must behave decently. W en

man murders , robs , dishonors women he is thrown is into rison . But when the Russian Government mur ering helpless men and women and children ff the other Governments look on in di erently. And If h yet they speak of God . t is had happened in the Middle Ages a crusade would have been start ed by civiliz ed peoples who would have marched to Russia to free the women and the children ” from the claws of the Government . H i Andreyev became silent . s wife kept rowing

for some time slowly, without saying a word . We 1 1 reached the shore and returned silently to

house . That was twelve years ago . Th met him several times after that. e last I vis it d him in Petrograd during th e July in 1 g1 g

literary friend thus describes the funeral of L i eonid Andreyev, wh ch gives a picture of the trage dy of Russia “ r In the morning a decision had to be reached as to the day of the funeral . It was necessary to s ee to the purchas e an d the delivery of the ffi co n from Viborg, and to undertak e all those u n

avoidable, hard duties which are s o painful to the

ared that the Russian exiles living in had no e rmits from the Finnish G ov ib o r go to g, nor the money for that er appeared that the family of had left at their disposal only w one 6 s hi hundred marks (about dollar ), w ch the doctor who had come from the station af ter An ’ dr eyev s death declined to take from the widow h for is visit . “ ll This was a the family possessed . It was necessary to charge a Russian exile living in a i neighbor ng village , who had a pass for Viborg, with the sad commission of finding among some wealthy people in Viborg who had known Andre ev l y the means required for the funera . “ On the following day mass was read . Floral in tributes and wreaths from Viborg, with black ri tion s s c p made hastily in ink on white ribbons , n began to arrive . They were all from private i dividu als . The local refugees brought garlands of autumn foliage , bouquets of late flowers . Their children laid their carefully woven , simple and touching little childish wreaths at th e ‘ fo o t of the ’ oflin c . Leonid Andreyev s widow did not wish to inter the body in foreign soil and it was de cided, temporarily, until burial in native ground , to leave his body in the little mortuary in the park on the estate of a local woman landowner. “ The day of the funeral was not widely known . The need for special permits to travel deprived many of the Opportunity to attend . In this way it happened that only a very small group of peo ple followed the body from the house to the mor r r tu a y . None of his close friends was the e . Th like his brothers , sister, one of his sons , were

Russia . Neighbors , refugees , acquaintances the last two ye ars with whom cidentally thrown him into XVI nn —al had no co ection with Russian literature , — most all alien in spirit such was the little group of Russians that followed the coffin of Leonid

An dreyev to its temporary resting place . “ as i u It w a trag c f neral, this funeral in exile , of a wr iter who is so dearly loved by the whole intellectual class of Russia ; whom the younger generation of Russia acclaimed with such enthu i m s as . “ n — Mea while he rests in a foreign land, waiting waitin g for Free Russia to demand back his ” his . ashes , and pay tribute to genius his Among last notes , breathing deep anguish ai hi and desp r, found on s desk, were the follow ing lines : Revolution is just as unsatisfactory a means of settling disputes as is war . If it be impossible to van quish a hostile idea except by smashing the skull i n which it is contained ; if it be impossible to appease a hostile heart except by piercing it with a bayonet, then , of course , fight ”

Leonid Andreyev died of a broken heart . But hi ni hl the spirit of s ge us is deat ess . ERM AN ERN TE H B S IN. N t m ew Yo rk Se e ber . , p

SATAN’ S D IARY

u r 1 8 Jan a y . A tl ti On board the a/n c . HIS is exactly th e tenth day since I have be come human an d am leading this earthly

life . lin i My lone ess s very great . I am not in need

of friends , but I must speak of Myself and I have

no one to speak to . Thoughts al one are not suf

ficient an d ll ~ , they wi not become quite clear, pre n oise a d exact un til I express them in words . It r is nec essa y to arrange them in a row, like sol

diers or telephone poles , to lay them out like a ri railway track, to throw acros s b dges and via

ducts to construct barrows and enclosures , to , — indicate stations in cer t ain places and only then

will everything become clear . This laborious in engineer g work, I think , they call logic and con t sis ency, and is essential to those who desire to

b . h e e wise It is not essential to all others . T y

may wander about as they please . f u one The work is slow, di ficult and rep l sive for ’ Satan s Diary

is a st to—I t to ll w—ho ccu omed do not know wha ca it to embracing all in one breath and expressing l a l in a single breath . It is not in vain that men re i spect their th nkers so much, and it is not in vain n i k that these unfortu ate th n ers , if they are honest s and conscientious in this process of con truction ,

r n . as ordina y engi eers , end in insane asylums I am but a few days on this earth and more than once have th e yellow wal ls of the insan e asylum

and its luring open door flashed befo re my eye s . ’ Y e s is diffi e , it extremely cult and irritate s on s ” ! th e nerves . I have just now wasted s o much of ’ ship s fine statione ry to express a little ordin ary ’ th ought on th e inadequacy of man s words and logic . What will it be necessary to waste to give expression to th e great an d th e unusual ? I want a t th to warn you , my e r hly reader, at e very out tra rdi s et o ni . ex o n , not to gape in ast shment The ary ca/rmo t be exp r es s ed in the language of your eli o th e grumbling. If you do not b eve me , g to nearest insane asylum and listen to th e inmates they have all realized So mething and wanted to can th e give expression to it . And now you hear e roar and rumble of th se wrecked engines , their

wheels revolving and hissing in the air, and you can s e e with what difficulty t h ey manage to hold intact the rapidly dissolving features of their as tonish ed faces ! 2 ’ Satan s Diary

u all I see yo are ready to ply me with questions , now that you learned that I am Satan in human form : it is s o fascinating ! Whence did I come ? What are the ways of Hell ? Is there immortality is th e there , and, also , what the price of coal at ? stock exchange of Hell Unfortunately, my dear reader, despite my desire to the contrary, if I had s such a desire , I am powerles to satisfy your very a proper curiosity. I could h ve composed for your benefit one of thos e funny little storie s about n d d hi o horny a hairy evils , w ch appeal s much to your meagre imagination , but you have had enough of them already an d I do not want to lie so rudely and ungracefully. I will lie to you else l where , when you least expect it, and that wi l be far more inte resting for both of us . — An d th e truth how am I to tell it when even my Name cann ot be expressed in your tongue ? d You have calle me Satan and I accept the name, j—ust as I would have accepted any other : B e it s o I am Satan . But my real name sounds quite dif fe rent f ! , quite di ferent It has an extraordinary sound an d try as I may I cannot force it into your narrow ear without tearing it open together with

i : o— An d hin your bra n Be it s I am Satan . not g more . An d o you y urself are to blame for this , my friend : why is there s o little understanding in 3 ’ Satan s Diary

’ 7 r is l e ack your reason , You reason ike a b ggar s s , c t in l il is on ain g on y crusts of stale bread, wh e it n to e s ecessary hav omething more than bread . , You have but two conceptions of existence : life

d . h and eath How, then , can I reveal to you t e ! third? All your existence is an absurdity only b e hi third n t cause you do not have t s co cep ion . An d

? - u where can I get it for you To day I am h man ,

e ou . k ul ven as y In my s l is your brain . In my are r mouth your cubic words , jo stling one an othe h ll about with their s arp corners , and I cannot te you of the Extraordinary . If I were to tell you that there are no devils I B t s a a would lie . u if I y that such cre tures do o Y ou s e e f u exist I also deceive y u. how di fic lt it ! is , how absurd , my friend I can also tell you but little that you woul d un der tand th e m n s of how I assumed hu a form, with which I began my earthly life ten days ago . First ll t o n of a , forge ab ut your favorite , hairy, hor y, s h re winged devil , w o breathe fi , transform frag ments of e arthenware int o gold and change old me n an n into fasci ating youths , d having done all

this and prattled much nonsense, they disappear b l . : we suddenly through a wa l Remem er when , want to visit your earth we must always become h i s o ll l a human . W y th s is you wi earn fter your hi e : am a u n death . Meanw le rememb r I h ma 4 ’ Satan s Diary

is n ot l being now like yourself . There the fou smell of a goat about me but the fragrance of p er to fume , and you need not fear shake My hand lest I may scratch you with my nails : I manicure them just as you do .

But how did it all hap pen ? Very simply . When I first conceived th e desire to visit this e arth I selected as th e most s atisfactory lodg

- - in 38 Am l e . g a year old erican bil ionair , Mr r n o i h ni —o f Hen y W o derg od. I k lled im at ght, s i course, not in the pre ence of w tnesses . But you n e hi cannot bri g me to court d spite t s confession, b Am ALIV ecause the erican is E , and we both greet you with one respectful h ow : I and Wonder good . He simply rented his empty place to me . An l You understand ? d not al of it either, the him ! t r can devil take An d, o my great reg et I return only through the same door which leads

t : you too to liber y through death. m This is the most important thing. You may u derstand something of what I may have to s ay f later on, although to speak to you o such mat ters in your language is like trying to conceal a mountain in a ve st pocket or to empty Niagara i w th a thimble . Imagine , for example , that you ,

' my dear King of Nature, should want to come l closer to the ants , and that by some mirac e you e ame l — b c a rea little ant, then you may have s ome ’ Satan s Diary conception of that gulf which separate s Me now ! from what I was . No , still more Imagine that you were a sound and have become a mere symbol

- No l a . ! musical mark on paper , stil worse - No comparisons can make clear to you that ter i s do o e s r ble gulf who e bottom even I n t s e a yet . ll Or, perhaps , there is no bottom there at a . i : tw o a r Th nk of it for days , fte leaving New snfier e ! York, I d from seasickness This sounds queer to you, who are accu stomed to wallow in di ? I—I a your own rt Well, h ve also wallowed in was nl i e it but it not queer at all . I o y sm led onc it n ot W onder o od in thinking that was I, but g , and s aid : “ W onder oo d ! Roll on, g , roll on There is an other question to which you prob ably wan t an an swer : Why did I come to this earth and accept such an unprofitable exchange “ a im to be transformed from Sat n , the mighty, ” mo rtal chieftain an d rul er into you ? I am tired of seeking words that cannot b e found. I will n answer you in English, French , Italian or Germa — n e languages we both understa d well . I hav grown lonesome in Hell and I have come upon th e earth to lie an d play . l is . An d You know what ennui as for fa sehood, la — you know it well too . And as for p y you can judge it to a certain extent by your own theaters 6

’ Satan s Diary

thl a r my e ar y friend ; I have heard th t you a e wise , ul r e s on tolerably honest , properly incred ous , p sive to the problems of eternal art an d that you yourself play and lie s o badly that you might ap p r eciate the playing of others : not in vain h ave e t a to r An s a r a c s . d s o you o m ny g I have come . You understan d ? My stage is the earth an d the nearest scene for b which I am now ound is Rome , the Eternal City, is n as it called here , in your profou d conception of eternity and other simple matters . I have not yet selected my company (would you not like to Fate Chance join But I believe that and , to t ll whom I am now subservien , like a your l l un l earthly things , wil rea ize my se fish motives n a d will send me worthy partners . Old Europe is s o rich in talents ! I believe that I shall find a keen t o o . and appreciative audience in Europe , I con of fess that I first thought going to the East , which some of my compatriots made their scen e of ao tivity some time ago with n o small measure of suc s an d ces , but the East is too credulous is inclined are too much to poison and the ballet . Its gods t ai ludicrous . The East still reeks o o much of h ry l animals . Its ights and shadows are barbarously crude and too bright to make it worth while for a o refined artist as I am t go into that crowded, foul i e m o ain at u . h a c rc s tent A , my fri nd, I s v th I ’ Satan s Diary even begin this Dairy not without the secret ln tention of impressing you with my modesty in th e role of s eeker of words and comparisons . I hope you will not take advantage of my franknes s and cease believing me . Are there any other questions ? Of the play it s self I have no clear idea yet . It will be compo ed by the s ame impresari o who will assemble th e

‘ —Fat f M o actors e i y modest r le , as a beginning, will be that of a man who so loves his fellow h beings that h e is willing to give them everyt ing, his soul and his money . Of course , you have not forgotten that I am a billionaire ? I have three ufficient— not — one billion dollars . S is it for e sp ectacular performance . One more detail befor

I conclude this page .

I have with me, sharing my fate , a certain Ir a —a win Toppi , my secret ry, most worthy p erson hi s lk hi s in black frock coat and si top hat , long nose resembling an unripened pear and his s - l moothly shaven , pastor like face . I wou d not s be surprised to find a prayer book in hi pocket . i th ere . e . My Toppi came upon this earth from ,

: from Hell and by the s ame means as mine he, too, assumed the human form and it seems quite suc — , , ce s sfully the rogue is entirely immune from sea sickness . However to be seasick one must hav—e s ome brains and my Toppi is unusually stupid e 9 ’ Satan s Diary

- h e n . e ve for this earth Besides , is impolite an d f ventures to o fer advice . I am rather sorry that out of our entire wealth of mate ri al I did not M res s select some one better, but I was p ed by his honesty and partial famili arity with the earth : it seemed more pleasant to enter upon this little j aunt with an experienced comrade . Quite a long time ago he once before assumed the hum an form and was so tak en by religious sentiments — — that think of it h e entered a Franciscan mon aste r e y, lived ther to a ripe old age and died l peacefu ly under the name of Brother Vincent . His ashes became the object of veneration for b e lie rs— il ve not a bad career for a fool of a dev . No sooner did he enter upon this trip with Me than — he began to snifi about for incens e an incurable habit ! You will probably like him .

An n . c . d ow enough Get thee hen e , my friend a I wish to be alone . Your sh llow reflection upon this wall wears up on me . I wish to be alone or onl y with this W on der goo d who has leased his abode to Me and seems to have gotten th e be st m Th e . a of Me somehow or other . sea is calm I no longer nauseated but I am afraid of something. I am af raid ! I fear this darkness which they call night and descends upon the ocean : here , in the

cabin there is still some light , but there , on deck, e are there is terrible darkness , and My yes 1 0 ’ Satan s Diary

reflectors— are quite helpless . Thes e silly they hi da worthless . They are able to reflect t ngs by y but in the darkness they lose even this miserable th e power . Of course I shall get used to dark ness . I have already grown used to many things . But just now I am ill at ease an d it is horrible to think that the mere turn of a key obsesses me with this blind ever present darkness . Whence does it come ? And how brave men are with their dim r eflec tors : they s ee nothing an d simply say : it is dark ! here, we must make a light Then they them selves put it out and go to sleep . I regard these braves with a kind of cold wonder and I am s s a seiz ed with admiration . Or must one po ses t o ? great mind to apprecia e horr r, like Mine You W on der o od al are not such a coward , g . You ways bore the reputation of being a hardened man an d a man of e xperience ! There is one moment in the process of my as sumption of the human form that I cannot r e col lect without horror . That was when for the first hi time I heard th e beating of My heart . T s regu

- as lar, loud, metronome like s ound, which speaks much of death as of life , filled me with the hitherto l inexperienced sensation of horror . Men are a n can ways quarrelli g about accounts , but how they carry in their breasts this counting ma 1 1 ’ Satan s Diary

i a i chine, reg stering with the speed of a m g cian the fleeting seconds of life ? o a below At first I wanted to shout and t run b ck , before I could grow accustomed to life , but here I looked at Toppi : this new- born fool was calmly brushing his top hat with the sleeve of his frock coat . I broke out into laughter and cried “ ! ” Toppi, the brush We both brushed ourselves while the counting machine in my breast was computing the seconds to and, it seemed me , adding on a few for good l measure . Final y, hearing its brazen beating, I thought I might not have time enough to finish ill my to ette . I have been in a great hurry for

some time . Just what it was I would not be able

to complete I did not know, but for two days I was in a mad ru sh to eat and drink and even sleep the counting machine was be ating away while I lay in slumber ! l But I never rush now. I know that I wi l man age to get through and my moments seem inex h stible au . But the little machine keeps on beat

l u . ing just the same , ike a drunken soldier at a dr m An d how about th e very moments it is using up

now. Are they to be counted as equal to the great ones ? Then I s ay it is all a fraud and I protest as a honest citizen of the United State s nd a as a merchant. ’ Satan s Diary

e I do not feel well . Yet I would not repulse ev n ! a friend at this moment . Ah In all the universe I am alone !

1 4 1 9 . February 7 , “ R . ome , Hotel Internationale I am driven mad whenever I am compelled to seize the club of a policeman to b ring order in my

: ! t ! brain facts , to the right houghts , to the left — moods, to the rear clear the road for His High ness , Conscience , which barely moves about upon

i : w s its stilts . I am compelled to do th s other i e re deb ra An d ab ca . there would be a riot, an , chaos — so I call you to order, gentleman facts and lady thoughts . I begin . l n . . Night . Dark ess The air is ba my There is a pleasant fragrance . Toppi is enchanted . We i are in Italy. Our speeding train s approaching

Rome . We are enjoying our soft couches when , ! t suddenly, crash Everything flie s o the devil i ts i . the train has gone out of m nd . It is wrecked I confess without shame that I am not very brave , that I was seized with terror and seemed x n to have lost consciousness . The lights were e ti guish ed and with much labor I crawled out of the i corner into wh ch I had been hurled . I seemed to have forgotten the exit . There were only walls and corn ers . I felt something stinging and beat 1 3 ’ Satan s Diary

at an d n ing Me , all about nothi g but darkness .

Suddenly I felt a body beneath my feet . I s tepped right upon the face . Only afterwards did I dis a of cover th t the body was that George , my lackey, killed outright . I shouted and my obliging Toppi came to my aid : he seized me by the arm and led

i : me to an open window, as both ex ts had been bar of car ricaded by fragments the and baggage . I l eaped out, but Toppi lingered behind . My kn ees li ni were tremb ng . I was groa ng but still he failed to appear . I shouted . Suddenly he re appeared at th e window and shouted b ack What are you crying about ? I am looking for our hats and your portfolio . A few moments later he returned an d han ded i me my hat . He himself had his s lk top hat on rri a and ca ed the portfolio . I shook with l ughter and said “ m n th Young a , you have forgotten e um brella ! ” fi n n H e But th e old bu o o has o sense of humor . replied seriously : “ An o w I do not carry an umbrella . d do y u kno , ” our George is dead and so is the chef . hi h as i an d So , this fallen carcass w ch no feel ngs upon whos e face one steps with impunity is our George ! I was again seized with terror and sud denl W l y my ears were pierced with groans , i d 1 4

’ Satan 3 Diary

o You are carrying your human f rm, Toppi, r ve y well . I respect you . But what are we to do — now ? Those lights yonder in the sky they are ” the lights of Rome . But they are too far away ! “ ” Y es ffi , it is Rome, a rmed Toppi , and raised “ ” his han d : do you hear whistling ? From s omewhere in the distance came the long

s . drawn , piercing, shrieking of locomotive , They r were sounding the ala m . “ ” Y es r e , they a whistling, I said and laughed . ! ” They are whistling repeated Toppi smiling.

He never laughs . m But here again I began to feel unco fortable .

was . e I cold , lonely, quivering In my feet ther

was still the sensation of treading upon corpses .

I wanted to shake myself lik e a dog after a b ath . You must understand me : it was the first time d that I had seen an felt your corpse , my de ar to reader, and if you pardon me , it did not appeal l me at al . Why did it not protest when I walked ' over its face ? George had such a beautiful young

face and he carried himself W ith much dignity .

. An d Remember your face, too , may be trod upon W i ? ill you , too , remain subm ssive We did not proceed to Rome but went instead ni in search of the nearest ght lodging. We walked W long. We grew tired . e longed to drink, oh, ! And me how we longed to drink now, permit 1 6 ’ Satan s Diary

m s to present to you my new friend, Signor Tho a

a. Magnus and his beautiful daughter, Mari fl At first we observed the faint icker of a light .

As we appro ached nearer we found a little house , its white walls gleaming through a thicket of dark i cypress trees and shrubbe ry. There was a l ght n in one of the wi dows , the rest were barricaded with shutters . The house had a stone fence , an d— . An . iron gate , strong doors silence At first

s . glance it all looked suspiciou . Toppi knocked f Again silence . Finally there came a gru f voice ,

Still silence . I knocked . Again silence . Finally r ufi n th e there came a g voice , aski g from behind iron door “ Who are you ? What do you wan t ? hi e Hardly mumbling with s parched tongu , my brave Toppi narrated the sto ry of the catastrophe t and our escape . He Spoke at leng h and then came th e click of a lock and the door was opened . Fol lowing behind our austere and silent stran ger we l entered the house , passed through severa dark t i and silen rooms , walked up a fl ght of creaking stairs into a brightly lighted room, apparently ’ the stranger s workroom . There was much light , n many books , with o e open beneath a low lamp shaded by a simple , green globe . We had not no ticed this light in the field . But what astonished me was the silence of the house . Despite th e 1 7 mo e not a o no a rather early hour not a v , s und, t voice was to b e heard . “ ” Have a seat . s at We down and Toppi , now almost in pain , b i the egan aga n to narrate his story. But strange ho st interrupted him “ Yes , a catastrophe . They often occur on our ” roads . Were there many victims ? e t l Toppi continu d his prattle and the hos , whi e him out listening to , took a revolver of his pocket t d a d and hid it in a able r wer, a ding carelessly “ — This is not a particularly quiet neighbor

e e . hood . Well, pleas , remain her For th e first time h e rais ed his dark eyebrows and his large dim eyes and studied us intently as if he were gaz ing upon something s avage in a

. n z museum It was an impolite a d bra en stare . I aros e an d said “ ar I fear that we e not we lcome here , Signor, and He s topped Me with an imp atient and slightly sarcastic gestu re . “ ll i . Nonsense , you rema n here I wi get you r some wine and food . My se vant is here in the

i s o l to . dayt me only, a low me wait on you You il w l find the b athroom be hind this door . Go wash e and fre shen up while I get th e wine . Mak your l ” se f at home . ‘ 1 8 ’ Satan s Diary

- 1 e l w Lt1 savag re ish, I t s un symp ath i n gentleman kept on g a book as if ther were no one else in the ’ To i s u room , undisturbed by pp m nching and the ’ r e i dog s st uggl with a bone . I stud ed my host l carefu ly. Almost my height, his pale face bore an

o . expression f weariness He had a black, oily,

n t- his hi s ba di e beard . But brow was high and s H o no e betrayed good sense . w would you de

b ? a e ari s . scri e it Well , here gain I se k comp son reat Imagine the nose betraying the story of a g ,

e a . a passionat , extraordin ry, secret life It is be u tiful and seems to have be en made not out of o f— muscle and cartilage , but out what do you it ?— H e call out of thoughts and brazen desires . ui at seems q te brave too . But I was particularly

b s : tracted y his hand very big, very white and

- impression of self control . I do not hi s hands attracted me s o much . But b e autifully e xact th e a f ex ctly ten o them, ten thin , cro oked fingers ! I s aid politely a o Th nk you , Sign r He replied “

a o a . My name is M gnus . Th mas M gnus Have some wine ? Am e ricans ? a e for a n I w it d Toppi to introduce me, ccordi g 1 9 ’ Satan s Diary

th e n to English custom, a d I looked toward

. be an l nus One had to ignorant, il iterate

not to know me . Toppi broke in W onder o o Mr . Henry g d of Illinois . His s r etar y, Irwin Toppi , your obedient servant . t ” citizens of the United Sta es . bufio on his The old blurted out tirade , evin a — thorough lack of pride , and Magnus yes , a l o w s . a little startled Bil i ns , my friend, billio He gazed at Me l ong and intently “ W onde r o d on e r Mr . go ? Henry W d go od? s you not, sir, that American billionaire who to bestow upon humanity the benefits of his lions ? ” f I modestly shook my head in the a firmative . ” a Yes , I am the gentlem n . — Toppi sh o ok his head in affirmation the as s ” ar e . Yes , we the gentlemen Magnus bowed and said with a tinge of irony in his voice : “ d W onder o o . Humanity is awaiting you , Mr . g Judging by the Roman newspapers it is extrem

impatient . But I must crave your p ardon for very modest meal : I did not know hi e I seized s larg , strangely warm hand

shaking it violently, in American fashion , I s “ a s Nonsense, Signor Magnus . I was ’ Satan s Diary

ai hi are a herd before I became a billion re , w le you i r w an stra ghtfo ard , honest and noble gentlem , whose hand I press with the utmost respect . The k a et devil ta e it, not a single hum n face has y aroused in me as much sympathy as yours ! ” Magnus said Magnus said nothing ! I cannot contin ue this ” “ ” - I said , he said, This cursed consistency in is deadly to my inspiration . It transforms me to a silly romanticist of a boulevard sheet and makes me lie like a mediocrity . I have five senses . I am a complete human being and yet I speak only An th e ? of the hearing . d how about sight I as hi sure you it did not remain idle . And t s sensa e tion of the earth, of Italy,of My exist nce which I now perceive with a new and sweet strength ! You imagine that all I did was to listen to wise T homas Magnus . He speaks and I gaze , under

i : W stand, answer, while I th nk hat a beautiful t ! ear h , what a beautiful Campagna di Roma I persisted in penetrating the recesses of the house, into its locked silent rooms . With every moment t my joy moun ed at the thought that I am alive , l that I can speak and p lay and , sudden y, I rather liked the idea of being human . a I remember that I held out my c rd to Magnus . W on der o o d was Henry g He surprised , but l aid the card politely on the table . I felt like im 21 ’ Satan s Diary

t k s l t plan ing a is on his brow for this po i eness , a to o . the fact th t he was human I, too , am I was particularly proud of my foot encased in

fine, tan leather shoe and I pe rsisted in swingin : e u c ! it swing on b autif l , human , Ameri an foot was extremely emotional that evening ! wanted to weep : to look my host straight in

eyes and to squeeze out of my own eyes , so f l o o e dn . v and goo ess , two little tears I actu did it , for at that moment I felt a little ple s a hit a ting in my nose , s if it had been by wo l of lemonade . I observed that my t ittle made an impression upon Magnus . — But Toppi ! Whil e I experienced this dr ou s poem of feeling human and even of —h e n e th ing, slept like a dead o at e very n hi table . I was rather a gered . T s was i a him go ng too far . I w nted to shout at , but Ma nus restrained me “ He has had a good deal of excitement an d i ” d r o W on e od. weary, Mr . g a e h ad The hour had really grown l t . We be talking and arguing with Magnus for two ho ff when Toppi fell asleep . I s ent him o while we continued to talk an d drink for l a r e strai whi e . I drank more wine , but M gnus

mn . himself . There was a di ess about his face was begin ning to develop an admiration for 22

’ atan s ar S Di y!

h W nder o o : o d . proac , Mr . g I am not jesting You will find in me the same pure love for humanity? hi w ch burn s s o fiercely in you . He was laughing at me and I felt pity for ! not to love people Miserable , unfortunate n u s . I could kiss his brow with great ple Not to love people ! “ ” Y e s ffi , I do not love them, a rmed M but I am glad that you do not intend to th e conventional road of all American th ro ist p s . Your billions “ s ! n i Three billions , Magnu O e could bu ld nation on this m oney C Y e s ? “ ! Or destroy a nation , said I . With this go a Magnus , one can st rt a war or a revolution I 7 ) Y e s ? I actually succeeded in arousing his interest his large white han ds trembled slightly and in eyes there gleamed for a moment a look of ' “ s : W onder o od ar e n ot pect You , g , as foolish !” I thought He arose , paced up and al room , and h ting before me asked snee “ And you know exactly what your humanity needs most : the creation of a new or th tion of the old state ? War or peace ? Rest W onder o od 0 revolution ? Who are you , Mr . g ll to l e thes e I inois, that you ess ay so v problems 24 ’ atan s ar S Di y ,

You h ad better keep on building your mate rnity is hospitals and universities . That far less dan or ’ the man s hauteur . I bowed my head and said

Signor Magnus . Who am I , W onder o o d t g , to under ake the solution of problems ? But I do not intend to solve them. I merely indicate them . I indicate them n h t a d I seek t e solu ion . I seek the solution and man the who can give it to me . I have never read ui a serious book carefully. I see you have q te mi of books here . You are a santhrope , You are to o much of a European not us sily disill ioned in things , while we , ni young America , believe in huma ty . A man must You in Eu rope are bad craftsmen and have created a bad man . We shall create a b et

n . ter one . I beg your pardon for my fra kness long as I was merely Henry W on der o o d I g— o te d myself only to the creation of pigs and

pigs , let me say to you , have been awarded no deco rations than Field Marshal ” ow I desire to create people . Magnus smiled ‘ a W onder o od : ul You are an lchemist, g you wo d ” le ad into gold ! want to create gold an d I seek th e 25 ’ Satan s Diary

’ h l e i p i osophe r s ston . But has t not al ready ? h as found It been found, only you do not Ah u s e : . how to it It is love , Magnus , I d k o e t n w y what I will do , but my plans are n o and magnificent . If t for that mi

smile of yours I might go further . Believe

Man , Magnus , and give me your aid . You kn ” what Man needs most . He said coldly and with sadness “ ” n ! He needs prisons a d gallows . I exclaimed in anger (I am particul arly adep in feigning anger) i me ! s e You are slander ng , Magnus I e you must have experienced some very gre at

fortune , perhaps treachery and “ W on de r o o d ! a Hold on , g I never s pe k of self and do not like to hear o thers speak of Let it be sufficient for you to know that you the first man in four years to bre ak in upon

s olitude and this only due to chance . I do ’ like people . “ . e . Oh , pardon But I do not believ it Magnus went over to the bookcas e and W i an expression of supreme contempt he seized

first volume he laid his hands up on . “ ” u h e And yo who have read no books , s do you know what the s e books are about ? 0 l o th e and sufierin s about evi , ab ut mistake s g 26 ’ Satan s Diary

h l r humanity . T ey are fil ed with tea s and blood,

o : hi hi W onderg od. Look in t s thin little book w ch I clasp between two fingers is contained a whole k oce an of human blood , and if you should ta e all !( of them together And who has spilled this blood ? The devil ? I felt flattered and wanted to bow in acknowl d ment e g , but he threw the book aside and shouted “ sir : ! h as ! No , Man Man spilled this blood X o Yes , I do read books but only for one purp se ; to learn how to hate man and to hold him in W onder o o d r contempt . You , g , have transfo med ? An d s ee r your pigs into gold, yes I can how you n gold is being tra sformed back again into pigs .

W onder o o d. They will devour you , g But I do not wish either to prattle or to lie : Throw your money — into the s ea or build some new prisons and gal l ows . You are vain like all men . Then go on building gallows . You will b e respected by seri ous people, while the flock in general will call you ’ e . ll gr at Or, don t you , American from I inois , ” wan t to get into the Pan theon ? “ ! No, Magnus ” “ ’ ! t o s e Blood cried Magnus . Can y u e that it is everywhere ? Here it is on your boot now I confess that at the moment Magnu s appeared to be in s ane . I jerked my foot in sudden fear and 27 ’ Satan s Diary

only then did I perceive a dark, reddish spot on my shoe—how dastardly ! Magnus smiled and immediately regaining his composure continued calmly and without emotion “ I have unwittingly startled you , Mr . Wonder good ? Nonsense ! You probably stepped on something inadvertently. A mere trifle . But this conversation , a conversation I have not conducted for a number of years , makes me uneasy and

- on der o od. good night, Mr . W g To morrow I shall have the honor of presenting you to my daughter, and now you will permit me And s o . on In short , this gentleman conducted me to my room in a most impolite manner and ff well nigh put me to bed . I o ered no resistance : why s hould I ? I must s ay that I did not like him at this moment . I was even pleased when he turned to go but, suddenly, he turned at the very a d threshold n stepping forward , stretched out his large white hands . And murmured “ Do you s ee these b an ds ? There is blood on ! them Let it be the blood of a scoundrel , a tor e turer, a tyrant , but it is the sam , red human l ! b ood . Good night — b H e spoiled my night for me . I swear y eternal salvation that on that night I felt great o pleasure in being a man, and I made myself th r oughly at home in his narrow human skin It 28 ’ Satan s Diary t made me feel uncomfortable in the armpi s . You s ee , I bought it ready made and thought that it woul d be as comfor atble as if it had been made i to measure ! I was h ghly emotional . I was ex f tremely good and a fable . I was very eager to ! ! play, but I was not inclined to tragedy Blood How can any person of good breeding thrust his white hands under the nose of a stranger—Hang men have very white hands !

Do not think I am jesting . I did not feel well . In the daytime I still manage to subdue Wonder ni s hi s good but at ght he lay hands upon me . It is he who fills me with his silly dreams and shakes — within me his entire dusty ar chive And how godlessly silly and meaningless are his dreams ! He fusses about within me all night long like a i returned master, seems to be look ng about for r something, g umbles about losses and wear and tear and sneezes and cavorts about like a dog ly mf ing unco ortable on its bed . It is he who draws me in at night like a mass of wet lime into the n depths of miserable huma ity, where I nearly choke to death . When I awake in the morning I feel that W on dergo o d has infused ten more de — grees of human into me Think of it : He may soon eject me all together and leave me standing —h e outside , the miserable owner of an empty barn into which I brought breath and soul ! 29 ’ Satan s Diary

’ Like a hurried thief I crawled into a stranger s hi clothes , the pockets of w ch are bul ging with o —n o f rged promissory notes , still worse ! is e It not only uncomfortable attir . It is a low, dark and stifling jail , wherein I occupy less space i W onder o o than a ring m ght in the stomach of g d.

You , my dear reader, have been hidden in your prison from childhood and you even seem to like I—I o l it, but come fr m the kingdom of iberty . ’ And I refuse to be W ondergo od s tap e worm : one swallow of poison and I am fre e again . What s a onder o od ? will you y then , scoundrel W g With i h Y ou out me you w ll be devoured by t e worms . — will crack open at th e seams Miserable carcass ! touch me not ! On this night howeve r I was in the absolute on der o d l to power of W g o . What is human b ood Me ? What do I care about the troubles of their life ! But W ondergo od was quite aroused by th e — s crazy Magnus . Suddenly I felt ju t think of it h l e T at I am filled with blood , ike the bladd r is an d of an ox, and the bladder very thin weak, so that it would be dangerou s to prick it . Prick it and out spurts the blood ! I was terrified at the idea that I might be killed in this h ouse : That some one might cut my throat and turning me w i l let upside do n , hang ng by the egs , would the blood run out upon the floor. 30

’ Satan s Diary and me th e t—Ah h th e seized by throa , a , by throat !

I awoke in pain . Apparently he did try to O pen me up . My wrath was so gre at that I neither sighed nor smiled nor moved . I simply killed nd r W o e o o d . g again I gnashed my teeth , straight ened out my eyes , closed them calmly, stretched out at full length and lay peacefully in the full e a E consciousn ss of the gre tness of my go . Had the ocean itself moved up on me I would not have ! batted an eye Get thee hence , my friend, I wish to be alone . r an d And the body grew silent , colorless , ai y empty again . With light step I left it an d before o ex traordinar my eyes there ar se a vision of the y, a th t which cannot be expressed in your language , my poor friend ! Satisfy your curiosity with the dream I have just confided to you and a sk no ! “ ” more Or does not the huge , sharp corkscrew — suit you ? But it is s o artistic ! =X= r 3; 3k 3? an d In the morning I was well again, refreshed beautiful . I yearned for the play, like an actor who has just left hi s dressing room . Of course

I did not forget to shave . This canaille Wonder good gets overgrown with hair as quickly as his hi golden skinned pigs . I complained about t s to

i W om ait us . Toppi w th h , while w ing for Magn I 32 ’ Satan 8 Diary k was walking in the garden . And Toppi, thin ing a while , replied philosophically “ hi Yes man sleeps and his beard grows . T s , — is as it should be for the barbers !

Magnus appeared . He was no more hospitable than yesterday and hi s pale face carried unmis a takable indications of weariness . But he was c lm and polite . How black his beard is in the day time ! He press ed my hand in cold politeness and said : (we were perched on a wall . ) “ You are enjoying the Roman Campagna, Mr . W ondergo od ? A magnificent sight ! It is s aid that the Campagna is noted for its fevers , but there is but one fever it produces in me—the fever ” of thought ! Apparently W on dergo od did not have much of ik a a l ing for nature , and I have not yet m naged to develop a taste for earthly landscape : an empty field for me . I cast my eyes po litely over the countryside before us and said “ People interest me more , Signor Magnus . He gaz ed at me intently with his dark eyes and lowering his voice said dryly an d with apparent reluctan ce : “ s Ju t two words about people , Mr . Wonder

. o s e e t good You will s on my daugh er, Maria. s She is my three billion . You understand ? m I nodd . y head in approval . 33 ’ Satan s Diary

But your California does not produce such l go d. Neither does any other country on this i t . s dirty ear h It the gold of the heavens . I am no t on de . W r o od e a believer, Mr g , but ven I ex p erience s ome doubts when I meet the gaze of my

Maria . Hers are the only hands into which you might without the slightest misgiving pl ace your billions I am an old bac helor and I was overcome with n n fear, but Mag us continued s ter ly with a ring of triumph in his voice “ sh e ! But will not accept them, Sir Her gentle s r han d must never touch this golden di t. Her clean eyes will never be hold any sight but that i t s . of h s endles , godless Campagna Here is her der o e . W on o d monastery, Mr g , and ther is but one exit f or her from here : into the Kingdom of ! ” Heaven , if it does exist “ I beg your pardon but I cannot understand

i d e in . th s , my ear Magnus I prot sted great joy “ Life and people

The face of Thomas Magnus grew angry, as it nd h e e u did yesterday, a in stern ridicule, int rr pted me “ s dear W onder o od And I be g you to gra p , g , is that life and peopl e are not for Maria . It warn enough that I know them . My duty was to ” d : i the u you. An now he aga n assumed attit de 34 ’ Satan s Diary —“ of cold po litene s s I ask you to come to my ! You too , Mr . Toppi an d h of had b egun to eat , were c attering i M ar a t . matters , when en ered The door

which sh e entered was behind my back . k her soft step for those of the maid s the dishes , but I was a tonished by the

- long nosed Toppi , sitting opposite me . His eyes ik hi as e grew round l e circles , s face red, if he wer ‘ ’ choking. His Adam s apple seemed to be lifted dis above his neck as if driven by a wave , and to i appear aga n somewhere behind his narrow, min isteri l h e a . collar Of course , I thought was chok to death with a fishb on e and shouted Toppi ! What is th e matter with you ? Take some water. l hi nno c But Magnus was a ready on s feet, a un

M d a . y ughter, Maria Mr. Henry Wonder — I turned about quickly and h ow can I expres s the extraordinary when it is inexpressible ? It was something more than beautiful . It was ter r ible in its beauty . I do not want to seek com is s a par on . I shall le ve that to you . Take all that you have ever seen or ever known of the beauti ful : h e un on earth the lily, the stars , t s , but add, add l sti l more . But not this was the awful aspe ct 35 ’ Satan s Diary of it : There was something else : the e lusive yet — astonishing similarity to whom ? Whom have

I met upon this earth who was s o beautiful- s o — b eautiful and awe - inspiring awe - inspiring n unapproachable . I have lear ed by this t W on der o o d do your entire archive , g , and I believe that it comes from your modest gallery “ ” Madonna ! mumbled Toppi in a ho arse voice scared out of his wits . “ ! So that is it Yes , Madonna . The fool was an d s right , I, Satan , could under tand his te

Madonna , whom people see only paintings , in the imagination of th e name which rings only in hymns f h e venl i s books , a y beauty, mercy, forg vene s love ! Star of the Seas ! Do you like that 1 1 Star of the Seas ?

It was really devilishly funny . I made a dee bow and almost blurted out “ Madam , I beg pardon for my unbidden trusion , but I really did not expect to meet h er e . I most humbly beg your pardon , could not imagine that this black bearded h as the honor of having you fo r his daughte A thousand times I crave your pardon for

e s . But enough . I said som thing el e

ri a. How do you do , Signo n It is indeed pleasure . 36 ’ Satan s Diary

! And sh e really did not indicate in any way that she was already acquainted with Me . One must respect an incognito if one would remain a gen tieman an d only a scoundrel would dare to tear a mask from a lady ’ s face ! This would have been all the more impossible , because her father, s u a Thomas Magnu , continued to rge us with chuckle “ o Wh n ot Do eat, please , Mr . T ppi . y do you ” W onder o o d ? . drink, Mr . g The wine is splendid In th e course of what followed 1 . She breathed 2 li . She b nked 3 . She ate h e l and s was a beautiful gir , about eighteen years s hi of age , and her dre s was w te and her throat bare . It was really laughable . I gazed at her

— : bare neck and believe me , my earthly friend I no t am not easily seduced , I am a romantic youth , but - b I am not old y any means , I am not at all an bad looking, I enjoy independent position in the world and—don ’ t you like the combination and Maria? M aria and Satan ! In evi of the seriousness of my intentions I can t at that moment I thought more of our X

and sought a name for our first- born

d- in frivolity . 37 ’ Satan s Diary

’ ’ Suddenly Toppi s Adam s apple gave a j erk and h e inquired hoarsely “ one i Has any ever pa nted your portrait, Sig ” no rina ? “ ” Maria never p o ses for p ainters ! broke

Magnus sternly. I felt like laughing at the f

Toppi . I had already opened wide

filled with a s et of fir st- class American ’ when Maria s pure gaze pierced my eye r t — eve y hing flew to the devil, as in that m of the railway catastrophe ! You understand —o r turned me inside out, like a stocking how shall I put it ? My fine Parisian costum e was driven in side of me and my still finer thoughts t o con which, , I would not have wanted “ however th e o sur vey to lady, suddenly appeared up n the

face . With all my secrecy I was left no more s ealed than a room in a fifteen cent lodging hous e . t sh e o r ave But f g me , said nothing and threw

her gaze like a projector in the direction of Toppi, l e o . i lumining his entire b dy You , too , would hav laughed had you seen how this poor old devil was — s et aglow and aflame by this gaze clear from the prayer book to the fishbo ne with which b e

nearly choked to death . Fortunately for both of us Magnus aros e an o him invited us to foll w into the garden . “ ” C e l t o the . om , e us g into garden, said he 38

’ ‘ Satan s Diary sweet and simple ! Toppi abandoned his r m lit a airs and I crossed my legs co fortably, a cig r, and fixed my steel - sharp gaze upon the whites of ’ s Magnus s eye . “ ofi to W onder o You must be _ Rome , Mr. g ’ They are probably worrying about you, said host in a tone of loving concern . “ ” H e mi I can send Toppi, I replied . s led added ironically i h o ffi I hardly th nk t at w uld be su cient, W ondergo o d ! I sought to clasp his great white hand but it did not seem to move closer . But I caught it just h e the same , pressed it warmly and was com p elled to return the pre s sure ! ‘ ! o ff ! Very well, Signor Magnus I am at once

I said . “ ” e l e h e re I hav a ready sent for the c arriag , ‘ th C plied . Is not e ampagna beautiful in the ” morning ?

I again took a polite look at the country- side and said with emotion

“ ! Y e s ul ! a , it is beautif Irwin; my friend, le ve s a u s for a moment . I have a few word to s y to Signor Magnus Toppi left and Signor Magnus open e d wide his him big sad eyes . I again tried my steel on , and his : bending forwar d closer to dark face , I asked 4 0 ’ Satan s Diary

e dear th e Have you ever observ d Magnus , very striking resemblance between your dau gh — r te , the Signorina Maria , and a certain cele ’ b rated personage ? Don t you think sh e resem the Madonna ? “ dear drawled out Magnus . No, ’ W onde r o o d a . g , I haven t noticed th t I never go Th e to church . But I fear you will be late . Roman fever I again seized his white hand and shook it vig fi N did o . o rou sl . o y , I not tear it And from my eyes there burst forth again th os e two tears “ ’ Let us speak plainly, Signor Magnus , said I . “ I am a straightforward man and have grown to love you . Do you want to come along with me and be the lord of my billions ? ”

Magnus was silent . His hand lay motionless in m a ine . His eyes were lowered and something d rk seemed to pass over his face , then immediately to l disappear . Final y he said , seriously and simply “ W on der o o d— I understand you , Mr . g but I e must refuse . No , I will not go with you . I hav h s failed to tell you one t ing, but your frankne s and confidence in me compell me to s ay that I h must, to a certain extent, steer clear of t e

R i ” The oman pol ce , I asked, betraying a l “ ” s ight excitement Nonsense, we shall buy it . 4 1 ’ Satan s Diary

” “ th e te n a l No , in r tional, he rep ied . I you do not think that I - have committed some crime . The trouble is not with police

. r W ond r . e o od he bought You are ight , Mr g , sa a an you y th t one can buy almost y one . t t a can tru h is h t I be of no use to you . What do you wan t me fo r ? You love humanity an d I de i in difl r t t. e en est At best I am t to it . Let it live and not interfere with me . Leave me my Maria, le ave me the right and strength to detest people as I read the history of their life . Leave Campagna an d that is all I want and all of Al I am capable . l the oil within me has b t onder o d ou W o . , g You see before you an i h e gu s d lamp hanging on a wall, a lamp — b once Good ye . “ ” no t I do ask your confidence , Magnus , I in r te j e cte d. ‘ r l . Pa don me , you wil never receive it, Mr W r de go od . My name is an invention but it is ” only one I can offer to my friends . “ ” To tell the truth : I liked Thomas Magnus that moment . He spoke bravely and simply. his face one could read stubbornness and This man knew th e value of human life and the mien of one condemned to death . But it

i o m the m en of a proud, uncompr mising cri in wh o will never accept the ministrations of 4 2 ’ Satan s Diary pri est ! For a moment I thought : My Father had a an d many bastard children , deprived of leg cy s wan dering about the world . Perhaps Thoma Magnus is one of these wanderers ? And is it pos sible that I have met a broth er on this earth ?

Very interesting. But from a purely human , busi o n an ness point of view, e c not help but respect a man whose hands are steeped in blood ! n I saluted, cha ged my position , and in the ’ n humblest posible ma ner, asked Magnus s per ' mis sion to visit him occasionally and seek hi s ad ai vi ce . He hesitated but finally looked me s tr ght in the face and agreed . “

W on er o o . . d d. Very well, Mr g You may come I hope to hearfrom you things that may supple An d ment the knowledge I glean from my books . , im by the way, Mr . Toppi has made an excellent pression upon my Maria ”

Yes . She has found a striking resemblan ce h e between him and one of her favorite saints . S ” goes to church frequently . Toppi a s aint ! Or has his prayer book over balanced his huge back and the fishb one in his throat . Magnus gazed at me almost gently and only his thin nose seemed to trembl e slightly —It with restrained laughter . is very pleasant to know that behind this austere exterior there is 4 3 ’ Satan s Diary so much quiet and restrained merriment !

It was twilight when we left . Magnus followed us to the threshold , but Mari a remained in se lu io c s n . The little white house surrounded by the cypress trees was as quiet and silent as we found fi n it yesterday, but the silence was of a di ere t r : e cha acter the sil nce was the soul of Maria . I confe ss that I felt rather s ad at this departure e M re s sions but very soon cam a new series of p , i e h which dispelled th s feeling. We wer approac ing Rome . We entered the brightly illuminated, densely populated streets through some opening. in the city wall an d the first thing we s aw in the l Eterna City was a creaking trolley car, trying to a make its way through the same hole in the w ll . i Toppi , who was acqua nted with Rome , revelled in the familiar atmosphere of the churches we were pasing and indicated with his long finger r emn an ts of ancient Rome which seemed to clingin g to the huge wall of the 1 1 just as if the latter had been bombarded with shells of old and fragments of the missiles clung to the bricks . Here and there we came upon additional heaps of of this old rubbish . Above a low parapet stone , we observed a dark shallow ditch and a large tri “ The m h al nk . u p gate , half su in the earth ” ! l ll . Forum exc aimed Toppi , majestica y 44 ’ Satan s Diary

coachman nodded his head in affirmation . With e very new pile of old stone and brick the fellow l swel ed with pride , while I longed for my New

York and its skyscrapers , and tried to calculate the number of trucks that would be necessary to clear these heaps of rubbish called ancient Rome h away before morning. W en I mentioned this to Toppi he was insulted and replied “ ’ You don t unders tand anything : better close ” your eyes and just reflect that you are in Rome . I did s o and was again convinced that sight is as much of an impediment to the mind as s ound not without reason are all wise folk on the earth blind and all good musicians deaf . Like Toppi I began to snifi the air and through my sense of smell I gathered more of Rome and its horribly long and highly entertaining history than hitherto : thus a decaying leaf in the woods smells stronger than the youn g and green foliage . Will you believe me when I s ay that I sensed th e odor of blood and Nero ? But when I opened my r eyes expectantly I observed a plain , eve yday kiosk and a lemonade stand . “ l ? ” l Well , how do you ike it grow ed Toppi, still dissatisfied “ It smells t l ll ! It il m ll Well, cer ain y it sme s w l s e 4 5 ‘ ’ Sata/n s Diary

o r : str nger with eve y hour these are old , strong

W on der o o d. aromas , Mr . g

And s o it really was : the odor grew in strength .

I cannot find comparisons to make it clear to you . All the s ections of my brain began to move and k u . b zz li e bees aroused by smoke It is strange , but it seems that R ome is included in the archive n er o od is of the silly W o d g . Perhap s this his na tive town ? When we approached a certain p opu lous square I sensed the clear odor of some blood s hi e relative , w ch was soon followed by the convi

t . ion that I, too , have walked these streets before

Have I, like Toppi, previously donned the human ? form Ever louder buzzed the be es . My entire beehive buzzed and suddenly thousands of faces , and dim white , beautiful and horrible , began to dance before me ; thousands upon thousands of c voi es , noises , cries , laughters and sighs nearly t s e . : me de af No , this was no longer a beehive it was u e fi a h g , ery smithy, where firearms were

being fo rged with the red sparks flying all about . Iron ! e e Of cours , if I had lived in Rome b fore , I must h ave been one of its emperors : I r emember the

expression of my face . I remember the movement

of my bare neck as I turn my head . I remember th e touch of golden laurels upon my bald head 4 6

‘ ’ Satan s Diary

e ? l h With a bon You are si ly, Toppi : s e is n did h k p olite a d not recognize you . S e simply too you for one of her saints . It is a pity, old boy, fo r e that we have chosen ourselves these sol mn, American faces : had we looked around more carefully we might have found some more beau

I ui i am q te s atisfied with mine , sa d Toppi s and e adly, turn d away. A glow of secret self

a hi e . satisf ction appeared upon his long, s ny nos A‘ h Ah ! , Toppi , , the saint But we were alre ady being accorded a trium l pha reception .

1 4 Febru ary . “ o l . Rome , H te Internationale no I do t want to go to Magnus . I am thinking to o much of his Madonna of flesh and bone . I have come here to lie and to play merrily and I am not at all taken by the prospect of being a o n mediocre act r, who weeps behi d the scenes and h hi r appears on t e stage with s eyes pe fectly dry. s Moreover, I have no time to gad about the field c atching butterflies with a net like a boy. m The whole of Rome is buzzing about e . I am an extraordinary man , who loves his fellow beings to and I am celebrated . The mob s who flock wor ship Me are no less numerous than those who wor 4 8 ’ Satan s Diary

two s all at ship th e Vicar of Christ himself, Pope — om l once . Yes , happy R e cannot consider itse f an orphan ! l all is I am now living at the hote , where aquiver with ecstacy when I put my shoes outside my door for the night, but they are renovating a p al ace for me : the historic Villa Orsini . Painters , u sculptors and poets are kept busy. One br sh ri pusher is al ready painting my portrait, assu ng mi me that I re nd him of one of the Medicis . The other brush - pushers are sharpening their knives him for . I ask him An d can you paint a Madonna ? l . s reco Certainly he can It was he , if the ignor i a lects , who painted the famous Turk on the c g r o n ette boxes , the Turk whose fame is kn wn even i An re America . d now three brush pushers a painting Madonnas for me . The rest are running about Rome seeking models . I said to one , in my m barbarous , A erican ignorance of the higher arts : “ But if you find such a model , Signor, just ? ” bring her to me . Why waste paint and canvas He was evidently pained and mumbled “ Ah — ? , Signor a model ’ “ I think h e took me for a merchant l n live stoc But, fool , why do I need your aid for m which I must pay a com ission, when my ante 4 9 ’ Satan s Diary chamber is filled with a flock of beauties ? They l i a l . Sav n r ola worsh p me I remind them of a a , an d they seek to transform every dark corner in

! my drawing room, and every soft couch into a confessional . I am s o glad that these society l l i adies , ike the painters , know so well the h story of their country and realize who I am . Th e joy of the Roman papers on finding that I did not perish in the wreck and lost neither my l as egs nor my billions , w equal to the joy of th e p ap ers of Jerusalem on the day of the r esurrec — tion of Christ in reality there was little caus e far for satisfaction on the part of the latter, as as re I am able to read history . I feared that I might

a o f . a mind the journ lists J C esar, but fortunately they think little of the past and confined them~ selves to pointing out my resemblance to Presi ! dent Wilson . Scoundrels They were simply m flattering my A erican patriotism . To the ma o rit j y, however, I recall a Prophet , but they do o n s n t know which one . O thi point they are ‘ At modestly silent . any rate it is not Mahomet my oppos ition to marriage is well known at all a telegraph st tions . ‘ It is difiicult to imagine the filth on which I fed my hungry interviewers . Like an experienced

- e swine herd, I gaz with horror on the mess they

at n d e t l . Al feed upon . They e a y t hey ive though, 50 ’ Satan s Diary

i ! Y es I must adm t, I do not see them growing fat terday morning I flew in an aeroplane over Rome and the Campagna . You will probably ask ’ ? did whether I saw Maria s home No . I not fin d it : how can one find a grain of san d among a myriad of other grains—But I really did not look for it : I felt horror- stricken at the great altitude .

But my good interviewers , restless and impa tient, were astounded by my coolness and cour age . One fellow, strong, surly and bearded, who nni reminded me of Ha bal, was the first to reach i me after the fl ght , and asked “ s . Did not the ensation of flying in the air, Mr W onde r o o d th e g , the feeling of having conquered man elements , thrill you with a sense of pride in , who has subdued ’ He repeated the question : they don t seem to o trust me , someh w, and are always suggesting the proper answers . But I shrugged my shoulders and exclaimed sadly “ Can you imagine Signor—No ! Only once did I have a sense of pride in men an d that was—in r bo th ‘ ’ the lavato y on ard e Atlantic . “ Oh ! In the lavatory ! But what happened ? A storm , and you were astounded by the genius of man , who has subdue d “ xt di r Nothing e raor na y happened . But I was 51 ’ Satan s Diary astounded by the genius of man who man age d to cre ate a palac e out of such a disgusting neces sity ” a r s a lavato y. C‘ Oh I) , l hi A rea temple , in w ch one is the arch priest ! ” “ e k of P rmit me to ma e a note that . It is such — an original illumination of th e problem

An d to - day the whole Etern al City was feeding hi on t s sally . Not only did they not request me to l but th e a t eave the place , on contr ry, his was the day of the first official visits to my apartments hi o t somet ng on the rder of a minister of s ate , an ambassador or some other palace che f came and poured sugar and cinnamon all over me as if I were a pudding. Later in the day I returned the

: s visits it is not very plea ant to keep such things . Ne ed I s ay that I have a nephew ? Every Amer ican millionaire has a nephew in Europe . My ’ i W onder od nephew s name s al so go . He is con ected l o n with some egation, is very c rrect in man ners and his bald spot is s o oiled that my kiss could serve me as a breakfast were I fond of s cented oil . But one must be willing to sacrifice l n s something, especia ly the gratificatio of a ense o f ll k c me sme . The iss ost not a cent, while it meant a gre at de al to the young man . It opened r for him a wide credit on soap and pgrfume y. 52 ’ Satan s Diary

But enough ! When I look at these ladies and gentlemen and reflect that they are just as they were at the court of A s chu rb anip al and that for the past 2000 years the pieces of silver received his by Judas continue to bear interest , like kiss

I grow bored with this old and threadbare play . n an d Ah , I wa t a great play. I seek originality talent . I want beautiful lines and bold strokes . This company here casts me in the role of an old brass band conductor. At times I come to the ’ conclusion that it wasn t really wo rth my while to have undertaken such a long journey for the

- t c sake of this old drivel Ti o exchange an ient, mag nificent and multi - colored Hell for its miserable n m . t a t replica E ruth, I sorry tha — his Madonna refused to join me we would have played a little—just a little ! t I have had but one in eresting morning. In fact o I was quite e xcited . The congregation of a s “ ” called free church, composed of very serious men an d women, who insist upon worshipping in a di ccordance with the ctates of their conscience , invited Me to deliver a Sunday sermon . I donne d

' a black frock coat, which gave me a close resem — blance to Toppi , went through a number of par ticularly expressive gestures before my mirror was r and d iven in an automobile, like a prophet d m s rv mo e , to the se ice I took as my subject or ’ Satan s Diary

” ’ text Jesus advice to the ri ch youth to dis — tribute his wealth among the poor and in h ot l an o n more than ha f h ur, I demonstrated as co e 2 2 4 ’ lusively as and make , that love of one s

neighbor is the all important thing . Like a p rac a tical and careful Americ n , however, I pointed out that it was not necessary to try and go after the whole of the kingdom of Heaven at one shot ’ “ and to distribute one s wealth carelessly ; that on e can buy it up in lots on the instalment plan an d

by easy payments . The faces of the faithful bore e a a look of extr me concentration . They were p p arently figuring out something and came to th e

conclusion that on the basis I suggested , the King dom of Heaven was attainable for th e pockets of l a l of them .

tu - Unfor nately, a number of my quick witted

compatriots were present in th e congregation . One of them was about to ri se to his feet to pro a pose the formation of a stock comp ny, when I realized the dan ger and frustrated this plan by and letting loose a fountain of emotion , thus ex tinguish ed his religi ously practical zeal ! Wh at did I not talk about ? I wept for my s ad child in a hood, spent l bor and privation ; I whined about

my poor father who pe ri shed in a match factory . I prayed solemnly for all my brothers and si sters a s o e t in Christ . The swamp I cre ted was hug hat 54

’ Satan s Diary

—h and I drove him out . But Toppi e was trium ph an tly silent all the way home and finally he said very respectfully “ t o You were in fine mettle day, Mr . Wonder I good . I even wept . t is a pity that neither Mag his nus nor daughter heard you preach , She sh e n would have cha ged her opinion of us . “ i You understand, of course , that I felt l ke kicking this admirer out of the carriage ! I again felt in the pupils of my eyes the piercing sting of hi wa n in hers . The speed with w ch I s again tur ed ’ side out an d spread out on a plate for the public s view is equal only to that with which an exp eri n e ced waiter opens a can of c onserves . I drew e d ll my top hat over my yes , raise the co ar of my coat and looking very much like a tragedian just fi e hissed o the stage , I rod silently, and without acknowledging the greetings showered upon me , Ah to t . I proceeded my apar ments , that gaze of Maria ! And how could I have acknowledged the greetings when I had no cane with me ? ’ I have declined all of to - day s invitations and am at home : I am engaged in religious medita ” — ti on this was how Toppi announced it to the

r . j ou nalists . He has really begun to respect me

Before me ar e whiskey and champagne . I am slowly filling up on the liquor while from the din ing hall below come the distant s trains of music. 56 ’ Satan s Diary

My W onde rgood was apparently considerable o f a drunkard and every night he drags me to the win eshop , to which I interpose no objection . ’ What s the difl er ence ? Fortunately his intoxica tion is of a merry kind an d we make quite a pleas ant time of it . At first we cast our dull eyes over the furniture and involuntarily begin to cal cul ate the value of all this bronze , these carpets , Vene

e tc. tian mirrors , “ ” ! n i A trifle we agree , a d w th peculiar self satisfaction we lose ourselves in the contempla tion of our own billions , of our power and our s in remarkable wisdom and character . Our blis creases with each additional glass . With peculiar pleasure we wallow in the cheap luxury of th e — —I hotel, and think of it am actually beginning to have a liking for bronze , carpets , glass and stones . My Puritan Toppi condemns luxury . It mm r is reminds him of Sodom and G o o ah . But it difficult for me to part with these little emotional ! pleas ures . How silly of me

We continue to listen dully and half - heartedly

e to the music and venture to whistle som . ae com anim n p e ts . We add a little contemplation on the c ll de ollete of the ladies and then , with our step sti o firm, we pr ceed to our resting room . But we were just ready for be d when suddenl y I felt as if some one h ad struck me a blow and 57 ’ Satan s Diary

e I was immediately seized with a t mpest of tears , nd Th of love a sadness . e extraordinary su ddenly

d . a foun expression I grew as bro d as space , as deep as eternity and I embraced all in a single ! ! breath But, oh, what sadness Oh , what love , Maria ! But I am nothing more than a subterranean lake in the belly of W o ndergo o d and my storms

in no way disturb his firm tread . I am only a s o a his hi lit ire in stomach, of w ch he seeks to rid himself !

We ring for the servants . “ Soda ! ” a I am simply drunk . A rivederci , Signor, buon notte !

1 9 4 u r 1 8 1 . Febr a y , “ Rome , Hotel Internationale .

Yesterday I visited Magnus . I was com

elled to in an d p wait long for him, the garden, when he did appear he was s o cold and indif

i fe rent that I felt like leav ng . I observed a few

‘ gray hairs in his black beard . I had not no ? ticed them before . Was Maria unwell I appeared i un t concerne d . Everything here s so cer ain that on leaving a person for one hour one may have to ” seek him in eternity . “ r is ou s Ma ia well, thank y , replied Magnu , 58 ’ Satan s Diary l y. He seemed surprised as if my question “ An d presumptuous and improper . how fl ir n de r o o d ? a s . W o are your a , Mr g The Roman sco r papers are filled with news of you . You are ” ing a big success . i With pain aggravated by the absence of Mar a , I revealed to Magnus my disappointment and my

ennui . I spoke well, not without wit and sarcasm . I grew more and more provoked by his lack o f ri hi s a attention and interest , plainly w tten on p le

and weary face . Not once did he smile or venture

to put any questions , but when I reached the story of my “ nephew ” he frowned in displeasure and

Fie ! This is a cheap variety farce ! How can trifle s you occupy yourself with such , Mr . Won

I replied angrily But it is not I who am occupying myself

with them, Signor Magnus “ And how about the interviews ? What about

that flight of yours ? You should drive them away .

This humbles your three billions . And is it true that you delivered some sort of a sermon ? ”

The joy of play forsook me . Unwilling as Mag

nus was to listen to me , I told him all about ’ my sermon and those credulous fools who swal

lowed s acrilege as they do marmalade . 59 ’ Satan s Diary

And did n hi d ff Mr you expect a yt ng i erent, . W ondergo o d “ I expected that they would fall upon me wi th clubs for my audacity : When I sacrilegiously bandied about the words of the Testament . “ ” Y e s , they are beautiful words , agreed Mag “ ’ nus . But didn t you know that all their worship of God and all their faith are nothing but s ac rilege ? Wh en they term a wafer the body of hi s Christ, w le some Sixtus or Pius reigns undi turb e d an d l s as , with the approva of all Catholic A the Vicar of Christ, why should not you , an mer c al i an from Illinois , c l yourself at least

? hi n o t as s acrile e Mr . governor T s is meant g , .

W onde r o o d. g These are simply allegories , highly convenient for blockheads , and you are only wast ing your wrath . But when will you get down to ” bus in es s ? I threw up my hands in skillqy simulated sorrow “ want kn o I to do something, but I w not what to s do . I shall probably never get down to busines ” until you, Magnus , agree to come to my aid . hit He frowned, at his own large , motionless , w e han ds and then at me “ W onder o o . d. You are too credulous , Mr g This

l . is a great fault when one has three bil ions No , 60 ’ Satan s Diary

ar a . I am of no use to you . Our roads e far ap rt “ ! But, dear Magnus dear I expected him to strike me for this gentle , hi w ch I uttered in my best possible falsetto . But o al l I ventured t continue . With the sweetness I

managed to accumulate in Rome , I looked upon the dim physiognomy of my friend and in a still

gentler falsetto , I asked “ al dear And of what nation ity are you , my Signor Magnus ? I suspect for some re ason that you are not Italian ? ’ He replied calmly

No , I am not Italian . But where is your country My country ? Omne solum liberam libero ? patria . I suppose you do not know Latin It means : Where freedom is there is the fatherland

of every free man . Will you take breakfast with me ? ” The invitation was couched in such icy tones ’ an d Maria s absence was so strongly implied

therein that I was compelled to decline it politely. The devil take this man ! I was not at all in a merry mood that morning. I fervently W i shed to weep upon hi s breast while he mercilessly threw

' I s i h cold showers upon my noblest transports . g ed and s changed my pose . I a sumed a pose prepared ’ Satan s Diary i al . e n i n especi ly for Maria Sp ak g a low voice , I said “

an . I want to be fr k with you , Signor Magnus a My past . contains many d rk pages , which I

should like to redeem . I He quickly interrupted me “ h ’ T ere are dark pages in everybody s past, Mr . on de r o r e W g o d. I myself am not so clear of proach as to accept the confession of such a wor ” thy gentleman . ” ri I am a poor spi tual father, he added with “ a most unpleasant laugh : I ne ver p ardo n s ire/ne rs

and, in view of that , what pleasure could there be

for you in your confession . Better tell me some ? ” thing more about your nephew . Is he young — W e spoke about my nephew a nd Magnus

smiled . A pause ensued . Then Magnus asked whether I had visited th e Vatican galle ry and I

- b bade him good y, requesting him to transmit a my compliments to Maria . I confes s I was sorry sight and felt deeply indebted to Magnus when he s aid in bidding me farewell “ W on der o o . d. Do not be angry with me , Mr g I am not altogether well to - day and amrather f ’ worried about my a fairs . That s all . I hope to a but s o be more ple sant when we meet again, be see kind as to e xcuse me this morning . I shall l ” that Maria gets your comp iments . 62

’ Satan s Diary

l th e e ear r simu ating gaze of oth rs , my h t, su ren dering obediently to the click of the look of a ' an e house of shame . I c s e all thes e excited ani mal s in their groan ing and their caresses and I cry with revulsion at my own mass of bones an d r ! ak at u flesh and ne ves T e care , S an in h man ! form , Deceit is coming over You ’ l m t Won t you take Maria for yourse f, y ear hly ? ' Ah friend Take her . She is yours , not mine . , if r Maria were my slave , I would putga rope a ound and her neck would take her, naked, to the market place : Wh o will buy ? Who will pay the most for a a ? this une rthly be uty Ah , do not hurt the poor,

l n : e s e b ind mercha t open wid your purse , jingl l ! ouder your gold , generous gentlemen t sh e ? a sh e Wha , will not go Fe r not, Signor, l o sh e . wil c me and will love you . This is sim I ! tie th e ply her maidenly modesty, Sir Shall I other end of the rope about her and le ad her to

ir ? ak . your bed , kind s T e the rope along with you

I charge nothing for that . Only rid me of this heavenly be auty ! She has the face of the radian t

Madonna . She is the daughter of the honorable Thomas Magnus and both of t—hem are thieves : he stole his white h an ds and sh e her pristine face ! Ah

in But I am beg ning to play with you , dear reader ? That is a mistake : I have simply taken 64 ’ Satan s Diary

the wrong note book . No , it is not a mistake . It s r is worse . I play because my lonelines is ve y r —I h as ! great, ve y deep fear it no bottom at all an d d I stand on the edge of an abyss hurl wor s , t a many heavy words , into it , but they fall withou

sound . I hurl into it laughter, threats and moans . fli I spit into it . I ng into it heaps of stones and — rocks . I throw mountains into it and still it i rema ns silent and empty . No , really, there is no o b ttom to this abyss and we toil in vain , you and ! I, my friend But I s ee your smile and your cunning laugh : you un de rs tand why I spoke s o sourly of h ’ ! t . A loneliness , tis love And you want o ask whether I have a mistress ?

Y es : there are two . One is a Russian countess . ’ ifl er The other, an Italian countess . They d only

m u s e in the kind of perfu e they . But this is such an immaterial matter that I love them both l equa ly. You probably wish to ask also whether I shall ever visit Magnus again ?

Y e s a e , I shall go to M gnus . I love him v ry much . It matters little that his name is false and that his daughter has th e audacity to resemble ’ n o the Madonn a. I haven t enough of W o derg o d in me to be par ticular about a name- and I am 65 ’ Satan s Diary

too human not to forgive the efforts of others to i appear div ne . I swear by eternal salvation that th e one worthy of the othe r !

21 1 91 4 . February , ,

Rome , Villa Orsini . X l . Cardina , the closest friend and confidante of th e h as a Pope , p id me a visit . He was aecom anie d bé . ral p by two ab s In gene , he is a person age whose attentions to me have brought me no s mall measure of prestige . I met H is Eminence in th e reception hall of my c new pala e . Toppi was dancing all about the r p iests , snatching their blessings quicker than th e a lover does kisses of his mistress . Six de o t n n v u hands hardly ma aged to ha dle one Devil , w gro n pious , and before we had reached the

threshold of my study, he actually contrived to ! touch the belly of the Cardinal . What ecstasy k Cardinal X . spea s all the European languages an i d, out of respect for the Stars and Str pes and i e . my billions , he spok Engl sh He began the con

versation by congratulating me upon the acquisiz tion of the Villa Orsini and told me its history in 2 un detail for the p ast 00 years . This was quite at u un expected, very long, times conf sing and s o l a l intelligible, that I was compelled, ike rea 66 ’ Satan s Diary hi American ass , to blink constantly but t s gave me an opportun ity to study my distinguished and eminent visitor . o He is not at all old . He is broad sh uldered, well built and in good health . He has a large , l a an s a most squ re face , olive skin , with a blui h a n tinge upon his sh ve cheeks , and his thin, but B e beautiful hands reveal his Spanish blood .

di o . fore he de cated himself t God , Cardinal X was a Spanish gran dee and duke . But his dark eyes are too small and too deeply s et beneath his thick eyebrows and the distance between the short nose and the thin lips is too long . All this reminds ? me of some one . But of whom And what is this curious habit I have of being reminded of some one ? Probably a saint ? For a moment the cardinal was lost in thought

: h and suddenly I recalled Yes , t is is simply a s monke ! s it s ad haven y Thi must be s , boundless s s it il pensivene , s, ev gleam within the narrow

But in a moment the Cardinal laughed jested , — and gesticulated like a Neapolitan lazzaron e h e was no longer telling me the history of the palace . r He was playing, he was inte preting it in facial expression and dramatic monologue ! He h as short fingers , not at all like those of a monkey, and when he gesticulates he rather resemble s a 67 ’ Satan s Diary

penguin while his voice reminds me of a talking — n parrot Who are you , a yhow ? ! No, a monkey He is laughing again and I oh ll s e rve that he rea y does not know how to laugh . It is as if he had learned the human art of laugh l s ter but yesterday. He ikes it but experience conside rable difficulty in extracting it from hi s im throat. The sounds seem to choke him . It is possible not to echo this strange contagious laugh ’ e ter . But it s ems to break one s j aws and teeth and to petrify the muscles . I as all m a a e t w re y re ark ble . I was fascin t d nl hi when Cardinal X . sudde y cut short s lecture on the Villa Orsini by a fit of groaning laughter i l m wh ch eft hi calm and silent . His thin fingers l r p ayed with his rosa y, he remained quiet and gaz ed at me with a mien of deep e st reverence and gentle lov e : something akin to te ars glistened in had a his dark eyes . I m de an impression upon ! him . He loved me ? a What was I to do I g zed into his square , ape d r l l like face . Kin liness tu ned to ove , ove into n d n th e passion , a still we mai tained silence another moment and I would have stifled him in my embrace !

are in Mr . Well, here you Rome , Wonder ” ol wi u ai good, sweetly s ang the d monkey, tho t

tering his loving gaze . 68 ’ Satan s Diary ” o Here I am in Rome , I agreed bediently, con tinuing to gaze upon him with th e same sinful pas sion. “ W on der ood And do you know, Mr . g , why I

i. e . di came here , , in ad tion, of course , to the pleas ” ure I anticipated in making your acquaintance ? a i I thought and with my gaze unch nged , repl ed i ? ” For money, Your Em nence Th e a his Cardin l shook, as though flapping a — wings , l ughed, and slappe d his knee and again lost himself in loving contemplation of my no s e . re This dumb reverence , to which I replied with c doubled zest, began to wield a peculiar influen e in upon me . I purposely tell you all this in detail order that you may understand my wish at that

: i a moment to begin cavort ng about, to sing like cock, to tell my best Arkansas anecdote , or simply to invite His Eminence to remove his regalia and play a game of poker ! “ Your Eminence ” der oo . . on d I love Americans, Mr W g

‘ Your Eminence ! In Arkansas they tell a st ory . “ s ee ? Ah , I , you want to get down to business

I understand your impatience . Money matters should never be postponed . Is that not so ? “ ’ It depends entirely upo n one s concern in the se ” atte i m rs , Your Em nence . 69 ’ Satan s Diary

e e e The square fac of th Cardinal gr w serious , i and in h s eyes there gleamed for a moment a ray. of loving reproach “ I hope you are not vexed at my long disse rta onde r o o d h . W . s o t e tion , Mr g I love much his tory of our great city that I c ould not forego the pleasure the things you see before you are

d. . W on der o o not Rome There is no Rome , Mr . g n Once upon a time it was the Eter al City, but to day it is simply a large city and the greater it e is grows the furthe r it is from eternity . Wher that great Spirit which once illumined it ? ” I s hall not n arrate to you all th e prattle of thi s

l o - al purp e parr t, his gently cannib look, his grim s aces and hi s laughter . All that the old haven monkey told me when it finally grew weary was “ Your misfortune is that you love your fellow beings too much “ Love your neighbor .

. Go Well , let neighbors love each other on teaching that but why do you want to do it ? When one loves too well one is blind to the short c o f an d : omings the , beloved still worse one ele s ou r e vates these faults to virtue . How can y form people and make them happy without real izing their shortc omings or by ignoring their ? th e vices Wh en one loves , one pities and pity is se e t n death of power . You , I am qui e fra k with 70

’ Satan s Diary

’ i h . W onder d s all t e o o . But t same, Mr g You , ! c . e s yourself cannot a complish much Yes , y ’ kn ow a One must people to m ke them happy. Isn t that your noble aim ? But the Church alone kn ows

people . She has been a mother and teacher for s x ri n e thousands of year . Her e p e e c is the only and s a one worth while , , I may y, the only reliable A s . one . far as I know your career, Mr Wonder

good, you are an e xperienced cattle man . And ex e ri enc you know, of course , what p e means even in the matter of handling such simple creatures H A s swine .

He was startled- and suddenly be gan to b i : . to cough, to wh ne he was laughing again “ ’ ’ ? . Swine that s fine , that s splendid , Mr W der o o d n o one fi th g , but do t forget that nds ! ” devil, too , in s wine C easing his laughter he procee ded t l In eaching others , we earn ourselves . I d n ot contend that all the methods of education training employe d by the Church were equ

c l. e suc essfu No , we oft n made mistakes , every one of our mistakes se rved to improve our

hi . methods we ar e approac ng perfection , Mr W onder o od we hi ! g , are approac ng perfection I hinted at the rapid growth of rationalism hi to w ch, it s eemed to me, threatened destroy the 72 ” but r . pe rfection of the Church, Ca dinal X again flappe d his wings and almost screeched with laughter. “ Rationalism ! You are a most talented hu ori t W ond r oo d ! m s , Mr . e g Tell me , was not the celebrated Mark Twain a countryman of yours ?

e s ! ! t hi . Yes , y Rationalism Jus t nk a moment From what root is thi s word derived and what —ratio ? An nes cis mi lis uan tiila does it mean , fi q i n ti ri it r is ? s ap e a g ur o b Ah , my dear Wonder good ! To speak of ratio on this earth is more out of place than it would be to speak of a rope ” in the home of a man who has just been hanged ! I watched the old monkey enjoying himself and I enjoyed myself too . I studied this m—ixture of a monkey, parrot , penguin , fox, wolf and what not ? And it was really funny : I love merry sui cides . For a long time we continued our fun at the expense of ratio until His Eminence calmed him self and assumed the tone of a teacher :

As anti - Semitism is the Socialism of 7 ,

And are you familar I told you we are approaching p erfec ! is tion So rationalism the wisdom of fools .

The wise man goes further. The ratio constitutes th e holiday dress of a fool . It is the coat he dons in the presence of others , but he really lives , 73 i Satan s Diary

l die sleeps , works , oves and s without any rati o at lL ” a a . W o n der o o ? Do you fe r death , Mr g d ik i I did not feel l e reply ng and remained silent . “ Y ou need not feel ashamed, Mr . Wonder

: good one should fear death . As long as there is death The features of the monkey ’ s face suddenly contracte d and in his eyes there appeared horror and wrath : as if s ome one had seized him by the back of his neck and thrust him into the darkness re a and terror of a primeval forest . He fea d de th

r . and his ter or was dark, evil and boundless I needed no word s of expl an ation and no other evi

: i dence One look upon this d storted , befogged and confused human face was sufficient to compel rev erence for the Great Irrational ! And how weak is their steadiness : My W ondergo o d also grew i ah ! pale and cr nged , the rogue He was n ow seeking protection and help from Me ! “ c ? Will you have some wine , Your Eminen e i Bu t His Eminence was himself aga n . He curved his thin lips into a smile and shook his head in the negative . And suddenly he broke out again with surpri sing fury “ 1 s And as long as there is death, the Church unshakable ! Let all of you who seek to under mi u — ne her, tear her, and blow her p you cannot And ? conquer her . even if you should succeed in 74 ’ Sat an s Diary

r o in ri y g her, the first to pe sh beneath her

d be yourselves . Who will then de against death ? Who will give you sweet i everlast immortality, in eternal l fe , in W on de r o o d Believe me , Mr . g , the al l not seeking your ratio . It is a misun 1 7 , ? ” But what does it seek, Your Eminence What does it want ? M un dus c ult decipi know our Latin ? the world wants to be ed ! ” An d the old monkey again grew merry, begun s his to wink , to beam with sati faction , slapped

al . knee and burst into laughter. I so laughed Th e rascal was so funny ! “ ” “ ? And is it you, said I, who wants to fool it The Cardinal again grew serious an d replied

d W on de r o o . The Holy See needs funds , Mr . g The world , while it has not grown rational , has be come weaker in its faith and it is somewhat ” diflic l u t to manage it . He signed and continued “ W onder o o d? You are not a Socialist , Mr . g W li e . Ah , do not be ashamed . are all Socia sts now We are all on the side of the hungry : the more l e ll a satisfied they wi l be, the mor they wi fe r ” death . You understand ? 75 ’ Satan s Diary

He flung out hi s arms and drew them in again, like a net filled with fish an d said “ W on e . d r o o d e We are fishermen , Mr g , humbl fishermen ! And tell me : do you regard the ” desire for libe r ty as a virtue or a vice ? “ The entire civilized world regards the desire l r ” i for ibe ty as a virtue , I repl ed angrily . “ I expected no other reply fr om a citizen of th e ’ e United States . But don t you personally believ that he who will give man limitless freedo m will al so bring him death? Death alone releases all ’ the earthly ties . And don t you regard words ‘ ’ ‘ ’ ” freedom an d death as synonymous ? “ I spe ak of political liberty . l ? a n o ob ec Of political iberty Oh, we h ve j e tion to that . You can have as much as you pleas ! ask of that Of course , provided men themselves al ? for it . Are you sure they re ly want it If they s ! e do , plea e help yourself It is all nonsens and calumny to say that the Holy See is in favor of th reaction . I had e honor to be present on the bal cony of the Vatican when His Holiness blessed the first French aeroplane that appeared ll over Rome, and the next Pope , I am sure , wi e gladly bless the barricades . The time of Galile W on der o od we ll k h as . a passed , Mr g , and now now that the earth does move ! ” 76 ’ Satan s Diary i hi He drew a circle in the air w th s finger, indi cating the revolution of the earth . I said : You must permit me to think over your pro ” posal , Your Eminence . u i Cardinal X . j mped up from his cha r and gently touched my shoulder with two of hi s aris to cratic fingers “ Oh, I am not hurrying you, my good Mr. Won er o d go d. It was you who were hurrying me . I am even convinced that you will at first refuse me, but when , after some little experience , you al ne ed will have re ized the real s of man I,

' W onde r o od too , love man , Mr . g , to be sure , not s o passionately and wi r He departed th the same grimaces , bea ing himself with dignity and dispensing blessings all h him about im. I saw again through the window at the entrance of the palace , while the coachman was bringing up the carriage : he was speaking i é r e nto the ear of one of his abb s , whose face ’ counte sembled a black plate . The Cardinal s nance no longer reminded me of a monkey : it was

a li . rather the f ce of a shaven, hungry, tired on This able actor needed no dressing room for his

- u ! l all make p Behind him stood a tall ackey, i li dressed in black, rem nding one of an Eng sh baronet . Whenever His Eminence turned about 77 ’ Satan s Diary

hi s h e l in direction , wou d respectfully lift his

faded silk hat .

Following the departure of His Eminence I was r sur ounded by a merry group of friends , with whom I had filled the spare rooms of my palace for th e purpose of al leviating my lon eli an d n ness en ui . Toppi looked proud and happy he was s o satiated with blessings that he fairly — bulged . The artists decorators and others what ,— ever you call them were greatly impressed by i ’ i the Card nal s visit , and spoke w th much glee of the remarkable expression of his face and the grandeur of his manner ! The Pope himself But when I remarked with the naivete of a Red o skin that he reminded me of a m nkey, the shrewd canaile s burst into loud laughter and one of them X immediately sketched a portrait of Cardinal . e in a cage . I am not a moralist to judg other peo ple for their petty sins : they will get what is due — them on their Judgment Day and I was much

pleased by the cleverness of the laughing beasts . They do not appear to have much faith in love ’ for one s fellow beings and if I should rummage

about among their drawings , I would probably

find a pretty good sketch of the as s Wondergo od. m t I like that . I find relief in com union wi h my 78

’ Satan s Diary

i li a th See s rumb ng with hunger . I g zed long at e well executed caricature of the Cardinal and the

z : e e longer I ga ed , the less I liked it no , th r was e something mis sing . The artist had sensed th

ridiculous pretty well , but I do not see that fire of spite and malice which is in constant play be

neath the gray ashes of terror. The bestial an d th e human is here , but it is not molded into ex trao r dina r that y mask which, now that a long distan ce separate s me from the Cardinal and I n o on hi s e n l ger hear heavy laught r, is begin ing di l fl me to exercise a most sagreeab e in uence over . Or is it because the extraordinary is inexpre s sible through pencil ? i s l t a In reality he s a cheap ra ca , no bet er than : h e is plain pickpocket, and told me nothing new human enough and wise enough to cultivate that contemptuous laughter of his at the expense of ea hims el the rational . But he rev led f to me and f i u do not take o fense at my Amer can r deness , dear

reader : somewhere behind his broad sh oulders , a cringing with terror, there gle med also your dear i e countenance . It was l k a dream, you under

stand : it was as if some one were s trangling you, to e : ! and you , in stifled voice , cried h aven Murder ! third is Police Ah , you do not know that , which wh o neither life nor death , and I know it was that was strangling you with his bony fingers ! 80 ’ Satan s Diary

? at But do I know Oh, laugh him who is

hi a . rn laug ng at you, comr de I fear your tu is Do coming to have some fun at my expense . I know ? I came to you from the innermost depths , merry and serene, blessed in the consciousness of h e s itat my Immortality . And I am already hi ing . I am already trembling before t s shaven ’ monkey s face which dares to express its own low

a n : horror in such aud ciously gra d style Ah, I have not even sold my Immorality : I have simply r as c ushed it in my sleep , does a foolish mother her newborn babe . It has simply faded beneath s u your n and rains . It has become a transparent nfi th e cloth without design , u t to cover nakedness of a respectable gentleman ! This reeking Won dergo od swamp in which I am submerged to my eyes , envelops me with mire , befogs my con s ciou sness and stifles me with the unbearable odors e of d cay. When do you usually begin to decay, : i my friend on the second , the th rd day or does it depend up on ' th e climate ? I am already in the proc ess of decay, an d I am nauseated by the odor of s o my entrails . Or are you used to the work of the wo rms that you take it for the elevation of thought and inspiration ? ma My God, I forgot that I y have some fair ! mdst readers, too I humbly beg your pardon , hi worthy folk, for t s uncalled for discussion of 81 ’ Satan s Diary

o . a a ali dors I am most unpleas nt conversation st, am milady, and as a perfumer I worse no , s till wors e : I am a disgusting mixture of Satan an h o a and American bear, and I know not w to p reciate s p your good ta te . am ! No , I still Satan I still know that I am immortal and when my will shall command me e I will strangl myself with my own bony fingers . But if I s ho uld fo rget? Then I shal l distribute my weal th among the to p oor and with you , my friend , shall crawl up nk the old shave n mo ey. I shall cling with my A e a i m ric n face to his soft slipper, em tting bles

. o s ings I shall weep . I shall rave with horr r “ ! ” Save me from Death And the old monkey, ai brushing the h r from his face , reclining comfort e al l ably, gl aming with a holy light illuminating — , about it and itself trembling with fear and hor — ror will hastily continue to fool the world, the world which s o loves to be fooled !

But I am jesting . I wish to be serious now . I him t b e like Cardinal X . and I shall permit o

gild himself with my gold . I am weary . I must

d an d W onder o o d me . sleep . My be g await I shall extinguish the light and in the darkness I shall listen for a moment to the clicking of the n d e counting machine within my breast . A th n

will come the great pianist , a drunken genius , and 82

22 Febru ary . ni Rome, Villa Orsi . n AGNUS was ot at home . I was received

by Maria . A glorious pe ace has suddenly de l scended upon me . In wondrous ca m I breathe at

. o this moment Like a schooner, its sails l wered,

I doze in the midday he at of the slumbering ocean .

e . Not a stir . Not a rippl I fe ar to move or to open wide my eyes , dazzled by the rays of the

sun . I breathe silently, and I would not rouse the slightest wave upon the boundless smoothnes s of

s e An a . the a. d quietly I l y down my pen

23 February . l Vi la Orsini . u a n ot a Thomas Magn s w s t home and , to my

r . g eat surprise , I was received by Maria I do not suppose you would be interested in how I greeted her an d what I mumbled in th e first few moment s of our meeting . I can only say that I 84 ’ Satan s Diary mumbled and that I felt a strong impulse to laugh . I could not lif t my eyes to gaze upon Mari a until my thoughts cast off their soiled garb and s e e did donned clean attire . As you , I not lose consciousness altogether ! But in vain did I take l these precautions : that torture did not fol ow. ’ Maria s gaze was clear and simple and it con taine s d neither earching, p enetrating fire nor was l th e fatal forgiveness . It ca m and clear, like — sky of the Campagna and I do not know how it —i happened t penetrated my entire being. h She met me in the garden . We s at down by t e t ga e , from which vantag e point we had a good e th e view of the Campagna . When you gaz at a Camp gna you cannot prattle nonsense . No , it was she who gazed at the Campagne and I gazed e — sk e into her ey s clear to the seventh y, wher you end the count of your heavens . We were silent — —or if you regar d the following as conversation we spoke “ Are those mountains ? Y e s , those are the mountains of Al bania . And — there is Tivoli . She picked out little white houses in the distance and pointed them out to me an d I felt a peculiar l ’ Th ca m and joy in Maria s gaze . e suspicious resemblance of Maria to the Madonna no longer troubled me : how can I possibly be troubled by 85 ’ Satan s Diary the fact that you resemble yours elf? And came a moment when a great peace of mind descended me upon . I have no words of comparison whereby to reveal to you that great and bright calm I am forever conjuring up before me its ai that accursed schooner with lowered s ls , on i which I never really sa led , for I am afraid of sea sickness ! Or is it because on this night of my i mi loneliness , my road s be ing illu nated by the Star o th e Seas ? f Well , yes , I was a schooner, if s o e you desire it , and if this is not agr eable to you All No thin s ee I was . Besides I was g. You what nonsense emerges out of all this talk when W ondergo od begins to seek words an d compari sons . I was s o calm that I even soon be gan to gaze ’ el into Mari a s eyes : I simply b ieved them . This is de eper than mere gazing . When necessary I h shall find those eyes again . In t e meantime I shal l remain a schooner with sails lowered . I shal l be A ll and I shall be No thing . Only once i f or did a sl ght breeze stir my sails , but only a moment : that was when Maria pointed out the n l Tiberia road to me , cutting the green hil s like a h ad white thread , and asked whether I ever traversed it before . “ ri Yes , occasionally, Signo na . I often gaze upon this road and think that it 86

’ Satan s Diary

n nd hi ri my ha d a s eyes were b ght and kind . Even his face s eemed less pale and not as weary a s usual. I was invited to breakfast lest it worry s a you, let me y right now that I remained until late in th e evening. When Maria h ad retired I C H i told Magnus of the visit of ardinal X . s merry fac e darkened slightly and in his eye s ap eare d his p former hostile flame . “ X m s e Cardinal . ? He ca e to e you ? I narrated to him in detail my conversation “ ” h e a a h e with t shaven monkey, nd rem rked that had impressed me as a scoundrel of no small caliber . Magnus frowned and said sternly “ l W onder o o d. a e You augh in vain , Mr . g I h v l a ong known Cardinal X . and I h ve been k is eeping a close eye on him . He evil, cruel and dangerous . Despite his ridiculou s exterior, he is ” as n d l ! cunning, merciles s a revengefu as Satan And ! a ! hi you, too , Magnus Like Sat n T s

- - n blue faced , shaven orang outa g, this caressing u a i nk o g erill , th s mo ey cavorting before a lo king glass ! But I have exhausted my capacity for in ’ th e sult . Magnus remark fell like a stone to l e bottom of my bliss . I istened furth r “ i s his th e His flirting with the Social st , jokes at l th e expens e of Galil e e are al lie s . Just as his a enemies of Cromwell hanged him after de th, 88 ’ Satan s Diary

s l l s o would Cardinal X . burn the bone of Ga i ee with immense satisfaction : to this day he regards fi n the movement of the earth as a personal a ro t. der o o d . W on It is an old school, Mr g ; he will stop

at nothing to overcome obstacles , be it poison or hi murder, w ch he will take care to attribute to the t misfortune of accident . You smile but I canno m l s o discuss the Vatican s i ingly, not long as it contains such and it will always produce i li l . . some one ke Card na X Look out, Mr W ondergo o d : You have landed within the n d sphere of his vision and interests , a , let me as

sure you, that s cores of eyes are now watching

' you perhaps me , too . Be on your guard , my friend ! ” was r Magnus quite excited . Fe vently I shook his hand “ Ah a ! l , M gnus 5 But when wi l you agree to help me ? ” “ But you know that I do not like human beings . ou W ond r o od It is y who loves them Mr . e g , not ”

I .

e his A gleam of irony appear d in eyes . “ Th e Cardinal says that it is not at all nece s

sary to love people in order to be h appy. ” o ! The c ntrary, he says “ An d who told you that I wan t to make people ? ou happy Again, it is y who wants to do that, 89 ’ Satan s Diary

n l . to C a not I Ha d over your bi lions ardin l X . His recipe for happiness is not worse than other

di . r his patent me cines To be su e , recipe has one disadvantage : while dispensing happ in es s it de s troys p e op le but is that impo rt an t ? You W on der o o s . d are too much of a busines man , Mr g , an d I s ee that you are not sufficiently familiar with the world of our inventors of the Best Means for the Happine s s of Mankind : Thes e means are more numerous than the s o - called best tonics f o r t l the grow h of hair. I myse f was a dreamer at one time and invented one or two in my youth but I was short on chemi s try and badly singed my did hair in an explosion . I am very glad I not th come across your billions in os e days . I am o nde r o o d be joking, Mr . W g , but if you wish to

is a : serious , here my nswer keep on growing and k multiplying your hogs , ma e four of your three t billions , con inue selling your conserves , provided an they are not too rotten , d cease worrying about the happiness of Mankind . As long as the world likes good h am it will not deny you its love and admiration “ And how about those who have no mean s to buy ham ? ” “ What do you care about them ? It is their — — belly pardon me for the expression that is lat o . a e rumbling with hunger, not y urs I congr tu

’ Satan s Diary donna an d told him of the miserable brush - pushers

’ in search of a model . He laughed, agreed with me in my opini on of the aforementioned resem an d l blance, grew wistfu . “

t l d. a a . W onder o o It is a f resemblance , Mr g You remember that heavy moment when I spoke to you of blo od? Already there is blood at the feet of Mari a the blood of one noble youth n whose memory Mari a a d I cherish . There are a l hi fat l faces , there are fatal r es emb ances w ch confuse our souls and lead to the abyss of self destruction . I am the father of Maria , and yet I myself hardly dare to touch her brow with my a o lips . What insurmount bl e barriers does l ve raise for itself when it dares to lift its eye s upo n ” Mari a ? This was the only moment of that happy day when my oce an became overcast with he avy “ a ar clouds , as t ngled as the h e d of Mad King ” i Lear, while a wild w nd shook the sails of my schooner . But I lifted my eyes to Maria , I met sk her gaze . It was bright and calm , like the y — above u s and the wild wind dis appeared without a o f trace , be ring away with it fragments the dark a ness . I do not know W hether you underst nd m hi ui e in these sea co parisons , w ch I consider q t : adequate . Let me explain I again grew l m t t ca m . What is that noble Ro an you h 92 ’ Satan s Diary who himself unable to find comp aris ons was hurled over the head of his Pegasus ? I am a white - winged schooner and beneath me is an eu : tire ocean , and was it not written of Her the Inco mp arable ? The day was long and quiet and I was charmed with the precision with which the sun rolled down it from s height to the rim of the earth, with the measured pace with which the stars covered the heavens , the large stars first, then the little ones , k until the whole s y sparkled and gleamed . Slowly

a . grew the d rkness Then came the rosy moon , at t first somewhat rus y, then brilliant, and swam maj estically over the road made free and warm d by the sun. But more than anything else di I and Magnus feel charmed when we sat in the half darkened room an d heard Maria : sh e played the harp and sang . And listening to the strains of the harp I r e aliz ed why man likes music produced by taut strings : I was myself a taut stri ng and even when the finger no longer touched me , the sound con tinu e d to vibrate and died so slowly that I can still hear it in the depths of my soul . And sud denly I saw that the entire air was filled with taut and tremblin g strings : they extend from star to s star, catter the mselves over the earth and pene trate my heart like a network of telephone 93 ’ Satan s Diary

t —if wire s through a cen ral station , you want

more simple comparisons . And there was s ome ’ thing els e I understood when I heard M aria s

voice . W on der od No , you are simmy an animal , go t When I recall your loud complaints against love its o and songs , cursed with the curse of mon tony —is that not your own expression t—I feel like i o ff send ng you to a barn . You are a dull and dirty animal and I am ashamed that for a whole e l ma hour I list ned to your sil y bellowing . You y

hold words in contempt , you may curse your em

braces , but do not touch Love , my friend : only through love has it been given to you to obtain a ni ! ! glimpse into Eter ty Away, my friend Leave o Satan t himself, he who in th e very blackest depths of man has suddenly come upon new and m ! n ot unexpected fla es . Away You must see the j oy and as ton is hm en t of Satan ! a The hour was late . The moon indic ted mid night when I left Magnus and ordered the chauffe ur to drive by way of the Numentinian road : I feared lest this great calm might slip

away from me , and I wanted to overtake it in the

depths of the CM pagna. But the speed of the

car broke the silence and I left my machine . It went to sleep at once beneath the light of the moon l over its own shadow and looked ike a huge , gray 94

’ Satan s Diary

. Tr th wall With each moment u flees from Me . In vain my words try to overtake it : they merely shoot by. In vain I seek to surround it in the tight embraces of my thoughts and rivet it with chains : the prison disappears like air and my em braces envelop nothing but emptiness . Only yesterday it seemed to me that I had caught my prey . I imprisoned it and fastened it to the wall v with a hea y chain , but when I came to view it in — ‘ the mo rning I foun d n othing but a shackled skeleton . The r usty chains dangled loosely from its neck while th e skull was nodding to me in brazen laughter . s ee l You , I am again seeking comparisons , on y to have the T ru th escape me ! But what can I do when I have left all my weapons at home and must resort to your poor arsenal ? Let God himself don this human form and He will immediately begin to speak to you in exquisite French or Yid dish and He will be unable to say more than it is possible to say in e xquisite French or Yiddish . ! God And I am only S atan , a modest, careless , human Devil !

Of course , it was careless of me . But when I looked upon you r human life from beyon d no , wait : You and I have just been caught in a lie ! B e ond , old man When I said from y you understood at once it must have been very far 96 ’ Satan s Diary

? i d away. Yes You may have already determ ne ,

mi . a perhaps , the approximate number of les H ve you not at your disposal a limitless number of “ ”

? . B e ond zeros Ah , it is not true My y is as “ ” H ere close as your , and is no further away

i r . than th s ve y spot You see what nonsense, what a lie you and I are pirouetting about ! Cast away your meter and your scales and only listen as if behind your back there were no tickin g of a clock and in your breast there were n o counting

An s o : e machine . d when I look d upon your life from B eyon d it appeared to Me a great and merry game of immortal fragments . ’ Do you know what a puppets s how is ? When c one doll breaks , its pla e is taken by another, but the play goes on . The music is not silenced , the auditors continue to applaud and it is all very in i th ter e st ng. Does e spectator concern hims elf u about the fate of the fragments , thrust pon the “ scrap heap ! He simply looks on in enjoyment . th e So it was with me , too . I heard the beat of r u c d ms , and wat hed the antics of the clowns . And I s o love immortal play that I felt like becoming

. n an actor myself Ah , I did not k ow then that it la is not a p y at all . And that the scrap heap was terrible when one becomes a puppet himself and that the broken fragments reeked with blood . ! You deceived me , my friend 97 ’ Satan s Diary

But you are astonished . You knit your brow in contempt and ask : Who is this S atan who does not kn ow such s imp le things ? You are ao to customed respect the Devil . You listen to the commonest dog as if he were speaking ex cathedra . You have surrendere d to me your last dollar as if I were a pro fessor of white and black magic and suddenly I reveal myself an ignoramus in the most elementary matters ! I understand your disappointment . I myself have grown to respect medium s and cards . I am ashamed to confess that I cannot perform a single trick or kill a bedbug by simply casting my eye upon

w . s it, but even ith my finger But what matter most to me is truth : Yes , I did not know your s imp les t things ! Apparently the blame for this ivi is for that d de which separates us . Just as you do not know my real Name and cannot pro i s o did nounce a simple thing l ke that, I not know o u rs y , my earthly shadow, and only now, in great ecstasy do I begin to grasp the we alth that is in

: t you . Think of it such a simple matter as coun ing I had to learn from W on der go o d. I would not e ven be able to button my attire if it were not for the experienced and dexterous fingers of that fine chap W onde r go o d !

li e . s en Now I am human , k you The limited sation of my being I regard as my knowledge and 98

’ Satan s Diary trembling fin ger points in the direction of ! ah, the scrap heap

Yesterday, I questioned Toppi about his former l h um ife , the first time e donned the h an form : I wanted to know how a doll feels when its head is i cracking and the thread which moves it s severed . We lit our pipes and with steins of beer before u s l th e , ike two good Germans , we ventured into realm of philosophy . It developed , however, that this numbskull has fo rgo tten eve rything and my questions only confused him . “ Is it possible that you have really forgotten ” e ! verything, Toppi “ Wait till you die and you will learn all about it yourself . I do not like to think of it . What good is it ? “ Then it is not good ? And have you ever heard of any one praising

e Quite true . No one has yet show red praises ’ 7 l ! And no one wi l, I know

We s at silent . “ And do you remember, Toppi, whence you have come ?

” “ lli — e From I nois , the same place you com ” from . “ o k s omethin els e . N , I am spea ing of g Do you 1 00 ’ Satan s Diary

remember whence you came ? D o you recollect your real Name ? ” d i Toppi looked at me strangely, pale sl ghtly

and proceeded to clean his pipe . Then he arose

and without lifting his eyes , said “ thus . I beg you not to speak to me , Mr W onde r o o d th e g . I am an honest citizen of United States and I do not understand your in

sinuations .

But he remembers . Not in vain did he grow pale . He is seeking to forget and will forget soon enough ! This double play of earth and heaven is too much for him and he has surrendered entirely to the earth ! There will come a time when he will take me o fi to an insane asylum or betray me to Cardinal X . if I dare to speak to him of Satan . “ ” I respect you , Toppi . You are quite a man , I said and kissed his brow : I always kiss the brow of people I love . Again I departed for the green Campagna desert : I follow the best models : when I am ill at e ase I go into the desert . There I called for Satan and cursed his name but he would would not m e . answer I lay there long in the dust, plead

ing, when from somewhere in the depths of the fl desert I heard the muf ed tread of feet, and a

bright light helped Me to arise . And again I s aw

the Eden I had left behind , its green tents and 1 01 ’ Satan s Diary

n u unfadi g s nrise , its quiet lights upon the placid h ear d waters . And again I the silent murmurs of lips born of Immaculate Conception while s toward my eye I saw approaching Tru th . And I stretched out my hands to Her and pleaded : Give me back my liberty “ ” M aria !

: ? a Who called Maria Sat n again departed , the lights upon th e placid waters were extinguished u —and and Tr th , frightened , disappeared again I sit upon the earth wearing my humM form and

gazing dully upon the painted world . And on my knees rested my shackled han ds . “ Maria ! It is painful for me to admit that all this is really an invention : the coming of S atan “ ” with his light and ringing step , the gardens of

Eden and my shackled hands . But I needed your attention and I could not get it without these

gardens of Eden and these chains , the two ex T h e — tremes of your life . gardens of Eden how — r ! beautiful ! Chains how ter ible Moreover, all this talk is much more entertaining than merely ’ r ee squatting on a hill, cigar in one s f hand, think ing lazily and yawning while awaiting the arrival f M aria of the chau feur . And as far as is con e cerned , I brought her into the situation becaus from afar I could s ee the black cypress trees 1 02

’ Satan s Diary

h e t n li t o h t night. S ay here a d s en t t e barking of Mars ! ” For several days dense clouds had been gather ing over Rome and a heavy rain had been beating i s l down upon t wa ls and ru in s . This morning I read in a newsp aper a very p ortentous weather bulletin : cielo nuvo lo il nen to fo rte e mare molto a it t n g a o . Toward evening the threat tur ed into a storm and the e nraged sea hurled ac ross a range of ninety miles its moist odors upon the s ea walls of Rome . And the real Roman , the bil all lowy Campagna, sang forth with the voices of li the tempest , ke the ocean , and at moments it an seemed that its immovable hills , its cient waves , e long evaporated by the sun , had onc more come

to life and moved forward upon the city walls .

Mad Mars , this creator of terror and tempest , i flew like an arrow across its w de spaces , crushed th the head of every blade of grass to e ground , sighed an d panted and hurled heavy gusts of wind into the whining cypress trees . Occasionally he would seize and hurl the nearest objects he could lay his han ds upon : the brick roofs of the houses shook beneath his blows and their stone walls roared as if inside the very stones the imprisoned n wind was gasping a d seeking an escape . h ll We listened to t e storm a evening. Maria l was ca m but Magnus was visibly nervous , con 1 04 ’ Satan s Diary stantly rubbed his white han ds and listened in tently to the antics of the wind : to its murderous s its whistle , its roar and its sign , its laughter and groans the wild - haired artist was cunning enough to be slayer and victim, to strangle and to plead for mercy at one and the same time ! If

Magnus had the moving ears of an animal , they would have remained immovable . His thin nose r e trembled, his dim eyes grew dark, as if they flected the shadows of the clouds , his thin lips mi n . were twisted into a quick a d strange s le I,

t : too , was qui e excited it was the first time since I became human I had heard such a storm and it raised in me a white terror : almost with the horror of a child I avoided the windows , beyond

. Wh which lay the night y does it not come here , I thought : can the window pane possibly keep it out if it should wish to break through ? Some one knocked at the iron gate s several times , the gates at which I and Toppi once knocked for admission . “ f That is my chau feur, who has come to fetch ” “ ” : me , said I we must admit him . Magnus glan ced at me from the corner of his eye and remarked sadly “ h There is no road on that side of t e house .

There is nothing but field there . That is mad is m Mars who begging for ad ittance . 1 05 ’ Satan s Diary

s And as if he had actually heard his word , Mars broke out into laughter and disappeare d hi i w stl ng . But the knocking was soon resumed . It seemed as if some one were tearing o fi the iron e t gat s and several voices , shouting and interrup in ing each other, were anxiously speaking ; an fant was heard weeping . “ Those must be people wh o have lost their way — you hear an infant ! We must open the ” gates . “ ’ Well, we ll see , said Magnus angrily. ” I will go with you , Magnus .

W onde r o o . Sit still , g d This friend of mine ui here , is quite enough He q ckly drew th at revolver from the table drawer and with a peculiar expression of love and even gentleness he grasped it in his broad hand and carefully hid l it in his pocket . He wa ked out and we could hear the cry that met him at the gate . ’ “ On that evening I somehow avoided Mari a s eyes and I felt quite ill at ease when we were left alone . And suddenly I felt like sinking to the

floor, and kneeling before her so that her dress might touch my face : I felt as if I had hair on my back, that sparks would at any moment begin to fly if some one were to touch it and that this would o relieve me . Thus , in my mind, I moved cl ser r and closer to Her, when Magnus retu ned and 1 06

’ Satan s Diary

The kind host himself went out to dismiss the h au fl eur h c . Through the window I could see t e bright lights of the lanterns of the machine and for a moment I yearned to return home to my a n w e b ple sa t sinners , who er probably im ibing their wine at that moment in expectation of my

' Ah n . I return , have long since aba doned philanthropy and am now leading the life of a u k amblerf a dr n ard and a g And again, as on th t hi o l first night, the quiet little w te house , this s u

: r e of Maria , looked terrible and suspicious this l o o n . volver, these stains of b d upon the white ha ds

and, maybe there are more stains like these here . Th But it was too late to change my mind . e machine had gone and Magnus , by the light, had blue ul not a , but a very black and beautif beard mi his an d his eyes were s ling pleasantly. In broad hand he carried not a weapon , but two s an d bottle of wine , from afar he shouted merrily “ On a night like this there is but one thing to

do . , to drink wine Even Mars , when I spoke to u ! u him, looked dr nk to me the rogue Yo r ” W onder o o d ! glass , Mr . g

But when the glasses had been filled, this merry drunkard hardly touched the wine and sitting deep in his chair asked me to drink and to talk . e l th e Without particul ar nthusiasm, istening to 1 08 ’ Satan s Diary noise of the wind an d thinking about the length ni of the ght before us , I told Magnus of the new and insistent visits of Cardinal X . It seemed to me that the Cardinal had actually put spies on my trail and what is more strange : he has man aged to gain quite an infl uence over the unb rib able Toppi . Toppi is still the same devoted friend of mine but he seems to have grown sad , goes to conf essional every day and is trying to persuade me to accept Catholicism . Magnus listened calmly to my story and with still greater reluctance I told him of the many un successful e fio rts to open my purse : of the endless hi a petitions , badly written, in w ch the truth p pears to be falsehood because of the boresome an d i monotony of tears , bows na ve flattery ; of crazy inventors , of all sorts of people with hasty projects , gentlemen who seek utilize as quickly , to as possible their temporary absence from jail o f all this hungry mass of humanity aroused by weakl the smell of y protected billions . My secre taries—there are six of them now—hardly man hi age to handle all t s mess of tears on paper, and the madly babbling fools who fill the doors of my palace . “ I feaf that I will have to build me an under

: hi ground exit they are watc ng me even at nights . at They are aiming me with picks and shovels , as 1 09 ’ Satan s Diary

‘ h n if they were in t e Klondike . The ons ense pub lish ed by these accursed newspapers about the bil lions I am ready to give away to every fool dis a playing wound in his leg, or an empty pocket, has driven them out of their senses . I believe that some night they will divide me into portions t and e a me . They are organizing regular pil grimages to my palace and come with huge bags . la a My dies , who regard me as their property, h ve a found for me a little D nte Inferno , where we take daily walks in company with the society that storms my place . Yesterday we examined an old witch whose entire worth consists in the fact that sh e h a s outlived her husband , her children and ff is . her grandchildren , and now in need of snu And some angry old man refused to be consoled and even would not take any money until all of us had smelled the old putrid wound in his foot . It was indeed a horrible odor . This cross old fel e low is the pride of my ladies , and lik all favor An d t . i es , he is capricious , and temperamental

are you tired of listening to me , Magnus .

I could tell you of a whole flock of ragged fathers , r t hung y children , green and rotten like cer ain

‘ wh o de s is e me kinds of cheese , of noble geniuses p i like a negro , of clever drunkards w th merry, red noses . My ladies are not very keen on ut l e e e a drunkards, b I ov them b tt r th n any other k1 1 0

’ Satan s Diary

e There has been a great chang in you , Won ” er o d g o d. “

s . Quite possible , thank you , Magnu

There used to be more life in you . Now you

r . a arely jest You h ve become ve ry morose , W onder go od. ( ‘ Oh xn You have even grown thin an d your brow is sallow . Is it true that you get dru nk every night ” in the company of your friends ? “ ” It seems so . a r th t you play cards , squande your gold , and that recently some one had been nearly murdered at your table ? ” ‘ I fear that is true . I recollect that one gentle man actually tried to pierce another gentleman hi ll with s fork . And how do you know a about that ? He replied sternly and significantly

Toppi was here yesterday. He wanted to see

Maria but I myself received him . With all W on der o od s a a due respect to you , g , I must y th t l ” your secretary is unusua ly stupid .

I acquiesced coldly . i a You ar e quite r ght . You should h ve driven ” him out . s I must say for my part , that my last two glasse of wine evaporated from me at the mention of 1 1 2 ’ Satan s Diary

’ Maria s tt name, and our a empted conversation was marked by continued evaporation of the wine

n ik . I dra k, l e perfume out of a bottle I have always regarded wine as unreliable matter . We found ourselves again listening to the storm and I remarked “ The wind seems to be growing more violent, ’ Signor Magnus . “ to b e Yes , the wind seems growing more der o o d i W on . violent, Mr . g But you must adm t ’

W ond r o d. . e o that I warned you beforehand , Mr g “ r n Of what did you wa n me beforeha d, Signor Magnus ? ” He seized hi s knees with his white hands and d h k irected upon me t e gaze of a sna e charmer . Ah he did , not know that I myself had extracted e ml my poisoned teeth and was quit har ess , like a ! mummy in a museum Finally, he realized that there was no use beating about the bush , and came straight to th e point “ ” M aria ai I warned you in regard to , he s d “ slowly, with peculiar insinuation . You remem ber that I did not desire your acquaintan ce and expressed it plainly e nough ? You have not for what gotten I told you about Maria , of her fatal influence upon the soul ? But you were bold and insistent and I yield—ed . And now you ask u s me and my daughter to view the highly exhilar 1 1 3 ’ Satan s Diary

ating spectacle of a gentleman in the process of di i re sintegration, one who asks noth ng, who ro ach e s on e c p no , but can find no sola e until every one has smelled his wound I do not want to d r o . on e repeat your expression, Mr W g o d. It has Y es sir a bad odor . , , you have spoken quite frankly of your neighbors and I am sincerely e fi a i glad you hav nally . ab ndoned th s cheap play at love and humanity . You have s o ! a many other pastimes I confess , however, th t I am not at all overj oyed at your intention of pre th e s edimen t senting to us of a gentleman . It ir mi seems to me , s , that you made a stake in leav ing America . and your canning business dealing with people requires quite a difie rent sort ” of ability. ! H e was t He laughed almos driving Me out , “ ” l a this ittle man , and I, who write my I in

- him super capital , I listened to humbly and ! n meekly . It was divinely ridiculous Here is a other detail for those who love the ridiculous before his tirade began my eyes and the cigar b e tween my teeth were quite bravely and nonoba lantl e y dir cted toward the ceiling, but they

changed their attitude before he had finished . To this very moment I feel the taste of that miser

l n . ab e da gling, extinguished cigar I was choking With laughter that is I did not yet know 1 1 4

’ Satan 3 Diary prising : he lo oked at Me with pity and even stretched out hi s hand . “ fi in su er . You are g very much, Mr Wonder ”— good ? a question quite difficult to answer for the celebrated duet! I blinked and shrugged my shoulders . This appeared to satisfy Magnus and fo r a few moments we were both silent . I do not nk know of what Magnu s was thi ing. I thought

: of nothing I simply examined with great interest, l — the wa ls , the ceiling, books , pictures all the fur nishin s i e g of th s human habitation . I was parti ularly absorbed in the electric light upon which I fixed my attention : why does it burn and give light ?

u . I am waiting for yo r answer, Mr Wonder ” good . So he was really expecting me to reply ? Very well . “ I ’ t s very simple , Magnus you warned me ,

- u I admit . To morrow Toppi will pack my tr nks and I shall go back to America to resume my ” business . “ And the Cardinal ?

? Ah ! l . What Cardinal , yes Cardina X ’ — e and my billions . I remember. But don t gaz at me in such astonishment . Magnus . I am sick of ” it . W onder o od? o . What are y u sick of, Mr g 1 1 6 ’ Satan s Diary “ It e . . Six secr taries Brainless old women , nu fi a s , and my Dante Inferno , where they t ke me ’ s o M a for my walks . Don t look at me sternly, g l nus . Probably one cou d have made better wine a out of my billions , but I m naged to produce only ? sour beer . Why did you refuse to help me Of ” course, you hate human beings , I forgot . “ But you love them ? s a s ? No What shall I y, Magnu , I am rather ’ n ifier n o i d e t to them . Don t look at me s pity ’ in l ! indif g y. By God , it isn t worth it Yes , I am fe rent d to them . There are , there were an there ’ will be s o many of them that it isn t really worth while “ ! So I am to conclude that you lied?

Look not at me but at my packed trunks . No , e I did not lie , not ntirely. You know, I wanted to do something interesting for the sake of amusement and s o I let loos e this this emotion . “ So it was only p lay?

I blinked again and shrugged my shoulders . I i like th s method of reply to complex questions . An d this face of Signor Thomas Magnus appe aled his e to me , too ; long, oval face recompensed m slightly for my theatrical failures and

Maria . I must add that by this time there was a fresh cigar in my mouth . 1 1 7 ’ Satan s Diary

You said that in your past there are some ’ s a dark page Wh t s the trouble , Mr . Wonder good ? ” “ ! it Oh was a slight exaggeration . Nothing in t par icular, Magnus . I beg your pardon for dis tu rbin g you needlessly, but at that time I thought I should have spoken thus for the sake of style Style ? th e Yes , and laws of contrast . The present is always brighte r with a dark pas t as a background you understand ? But I have already told n you , Mag us , that my prank had little result . In the place I come from they have quite a mistak en conception of the pleasures of the game here . I shall have to disabuse them when I get b ack . For a moment I was taken in by the old monkey, but its method of fleecing people is rather ancient and too certain like a counting house . I prefer ” an element of risk . “ Fleecing people ? ’ ? Don t we despise them, Magnus And if the h a ai game s f led , let us not at least deny ourselves

nk e a . the pleasure of speaking fra ly . I am v ry gl d er But I am tired of this prattle and, with your p ” mi e . ssion , I will tak another glass of wine There was not even the resemblance of a smile ’ o a m l n Thomas Magnus f ce . I mention the s i e 1 1 8

’ Satan s Diary an d hopping all over th e stage when the sup — moved upon him with their crosses an d silent reply to Magnus was an artistic p rovisation of both the first and the second t ah , at that moment I could think of nothing b to imitate ! I swear by eternal salvation never before had I been permeated by s o many deadly currents , never did I drink such bitter n n wine , never was my soul seized with such u co trollable laughter ! ik e Now I no longer laugh or cringe , l a actor . I am alone and only my own serio can hear and s e e Me . But in that moment of umph I needed all my strength to control laughter s o that I might not deal ringing blow the fac e of this stem and honest man hurling

Madonna into the embraces of the Devil . you really think s o ? No ? Or are you merely W on der o o d Am thinking of g , the erican , with goatee an d wet cigar between his gold teeth ! tr ed an d and contempt, love anguish , wrath t — th e laugh er, these filled to the brim cup sented to Me no , still worse , still more bi still more deadly ! What do I care about th ceived Magnus or the stupidity of his ey brain ? But how could the pure eyes of have be en deceived ? Or am I really such a clever Don Juan that 1 20 ’ Satan s Diary can turn the head of an innocent and trusting girl e ? by a few simple , sil nt meetings Madonna, ? s o r e where art Thou Or, has she di c vered a n semblance between myself and one of her sai ts , i ’ like Topp s . But I do not carry with me a trav ! ? eling prayer book Madonna, where art Thou

Are thy lips stretching out to mine ? Madonna, where art Thou ? Or ?

An d yet I cringed like an actor . I sought to stifle in respectful mumbling my hatred and my “ ” contempt when this new o r suddenly filled me with new confusion and such love ah , such love ! “ “ Or Th i , thought I, has y immortal ty , Ma l donna, echoed the immorta ity of Satan and is it now stretching forth this gentle hand to it from e ? divin e the realms of Et rnity Thou, who art , hast thou recognized a friend in him who has b e human ? above come Thou , who art , dost thou him below? Oh pity who is , Madonna , lay thy han d upon my dark head that I may recogniz e thee by thy touch !

But hear what further transpired that night.

I know not why Maria has fallen in love with you . That is a secret of her soul , too much for my i understand ng. No , I do not know, but I bo w ll to her wi as to her frankness . What are my 1 21 ’ Satan s Diary

e all- human eyes b fore her penetrating gaze, Mr. W o nde rgo o d ! a i th e e t (The latter, too , was s y ng sam hing ! “ ” o A m ment ago , in a fit of excitement , con “ tinue d i Magnus , I said someth ng about murder der . W on d . o o and death No, Mr g , you may rest secure forever : the chosen one of Maria eu t j oys complete immuni y as far as I am concerned . — He is protected by more than the law her pure his r e love is a mor . Of course , I shall hav to ask you to le ave u s at once . And I believe in your W on der o o d t l ce e honest intention g , o p a the oc an between us ‘ But Magnus moved forward towards me and shouted angrily “ Not another word ! I can not kill you but ‘ ’ e n if you dare to m ntio the word marriage ,

e hi s an d He slowly dropp d uplifted hand , con tinned calmly : ‘ I s e e that I will have to b eg your pardon again a als e for my fit of passion , but it is better th n f

h o o d o f h a . , examples which we ve had from you

W onder o o d. D o not defend yourself, g It is quite e An d r e me unn cessary . of ma riag let will ring less insulting to Maria than it would hi le m t a . from your lips . It is qui e unt nk b Reme 1 22

’ Satan s Diary

An d do you remember what you said about love ? Ah W on der o your for man , my dear go d : I would be a bad warrior and politician if my edu cation did not embrace the art of lying a little . ’ ! We were both playing, that s all “ ” i i You played better, I adm tted quite gloom ly. An d r — you played ve y badly, my friend , do o fiende d not be . But what am I to do when there suddenly appears before me a gentleman all loaded with gold like “ Like an ass . Continue . And begins to reveal to me his love for hu i manity, wh le his confidence in his success is equal only to the quantity of the dollars in his pocket ? W onde r o o d The main fault of your play, Mr . g , is that you are too eager for success and seek im hi c a mediate results . T s makes the spe t tor cold and less credulous . To be sure , I really did not think you were merely acting— the worst play is — be tter than sincere as s ininity and I must again crave your pardon : you seemed to me just one of those foolish Yankees who really take their own bombastic and contemptible tirades seriously and you understand ? ”

be . Quite fully . I g you to continue — u Only one phrase of yours , something abo t i il w—ar and revolution purchasable w th your b li seemed to me to posses s a modicum of inter 1 24 ’ Satan s Diary

r l oo but the rest of the d ive proved that that, t , l was a mere s ip of the tongue, an accidental ex ’ cerpt of some one else s text . Your newspaper fli anc —re triumphs , your pp y in serious matters member Cardinal X !—your cheap ph ilanthropy f No are of a quite di ferent tone , Mr . Won er o od ! d g , you are not fit for serious drama And

- your prattling to day, despite its cynicism, made a better impression than your flamboyant circus

: M ri pathos . I say frankly were it not for a a I would gladly have had a good laugh at your ex pense , and , without the slightest compunction would have raised the farewell cup ! ” “ : r Just one correction , Magnus I ea nestly de sired that you should take part “ ? ? In what In your play Yes , your play lacked the creative facto r and you earnestly de sired to saddle me with your poverty of spirit . Just as you hire your artists to paint and decorate your palaces s o you wanted to hire my will and i ! ” my imag nation , my power and my love But your hatred for man Up to this point Magnus had maintained his tone of irony and subtle ridicule : my remark, how hi e ever, seemed to change m ntirely. He grew pale , his white hands moved convulsively over his body as if they were searching for a weapon , and his e l fac became threatening and even horrib e . 1 25 A s if fearing the power of his own voice , he low ered it almost to a whisper ; as if fearing that his words would break their leash and run off at a i wild pace , he tr ed desperately to hold them in check and in order . “ ? sir Hatred Be silent , . Or have you no con science at all or an y common sense ? My con ! ! tempt My hatred They were my reply, not to e love your th atrical , but to your sincere and dead ff indi erence . You were insulting me as a human being by your indifieren ce : You were insulting f ! . wa life by your indi ference It s in your voice , e it gleamed savagely out of your yes , and more ! than once was I seized by terror terror, sir - when I pierced deeper the mysterious e mpti ness of your pupils . If your past has no dark pages , which, as you say, you merely added for the sake of style , then there is something worse t whi An d than that in i : there are te p ages in it . I cann ot read them ! “ ! ” Oh, oh e l When I look at your terna cigar, and see your self - s atisfied but handsome and energetic

' face ; when I view your unassuming manner, in which the simplicity of the grog shop is elevated ni ul to the heights of Purita sm, I f ly understand i your na ve game . But I need only meet the pupil of your eye or its white rim and I am im 1 26

’ Satan s Diary

n - da Do not forget, Mag us , that to y I myself ” S indifieren poke to you of ce . n He waved his ha d wearily and carelessly. “ Yes , you did speak . But there is something W on der o o d else involved here , g . There is noth f ing insulting in the indi ference , but in the other I sensed it immediately upon your appear ance with your billions . I do not kn ow whether but immedi you will understand what I mean, I ately felt like shouting of hatred and to demand gallows and blood . The gallows is a gloomy thing but the curious j ostling about the gallows , Mr . W onde r o od ! g , are quite unbearable I do not know what they think of our game here in the ‘ ’ place you come from, but we pay for it with our lives , and when there suddenly appears before us some curious gentleman in a top hat, cigar in mouth , one feels , you understand , like seizing him by the back of his neck and he never

m . stays to the end of the perfor ance , anyway W onde r o o d Have you , too , Mr . g , dropped in on us for a brief visit ? ” With what a long sigh I uttered the name of

M aria! And I no longer played , I no longer lied , when I replied to this gloomy man “ Y e s , I have dropped in on you for a brief visit ,

r . Signor Magnus . You have guessed ight For

' certain ve ry valid r eas on s I can reveal nothing to 1 28 ’ Satan s Diary

hit l th e you of the w e pages of my ife, existence of which behind my leather binding you have like

wise guessed . But on one of them was written eath de art r t0 d p u e . That was not a p hat in the

hands of the curious visitor, but a revolver you understand : I look on as long as it is interest ing and after that I make my bow and depart .

Let me put it clearer and simpler, out of defer

l : ence to your rea ism in a few days , perhaps to

r . mor ow, I depart for the other world No , that is not clear enough : in a few days or to - mor re row I shall shoot myself, kill myself with a volver . I at first planned to aim at my heart but have decided that the brain would be more reli able . I have planned all this long ago , at the very beginning of my appearance before you, and was it not in this r eadin es s of mine to depart that you have detected ‘ inhuman ’ indifference ? Isn ’ t it true that when one eye is directed upon the o ther world, it is hardly possible to maintain any particularly bright flame in the eye directed upon this world ? I refer to the kind of flame I see ! in your eyes . O you have wonderful eyes , Sig ’ nor Magnus . Magnus remained silent for a few moments and then said “ An d Maria ? m Per it me to reply. I prize Signorina Maria 1 29 ’ Satan s Diary to o highly not to regard her love for me as a ” l a fata mist ke . “ But you wanted that love ? It is very diflicult for me to answer that ques — tion . At first, perhaps when I indulged in

—J dreams for a while but the more I perceived this fatal resemblance “ ” That is mere resemblance , Magnus hastened “ ’ to : tn be hi assure me But you mus t a c ld, Won ’ er ood ! an d d g Maria s soul is lofty beautiful , but n h sh e . S e is huma , made of flesh and bone prob ably has her own little sins , too . “ b ? And how a out my top hat, Magnus How about my free departure ? I need only buy a seat to gaz e upon Maria and her fatal resemblance — admitting that it is only resemblance but h ow ” must I pay for love ? Magnus said sternly “ Only with your life . nl e ! H ow did You see : o y with my lif , then , you expect me ‘ to desire such love ?” “ But you have miscalculated : sh e already loves 7 ?

l Oh, if the Signorina Maria rea ly loves me

death : do then my can be no obstacle however, I not make myself clear . I wanted to say that my

e ar b sa . d p ture no, I had etter y nothing In 1 30

’ Satan s Diary

ence . There was the gleam of faces , the weak sound of voices and curious laughter . And then ,

again all was silent . I turned my gaze to the other — side and there I was met by dumbness . It was as if I were immured between two dumb , stone : was th eir h walls behind one human life , w ich I an d had abandoned, behind the other , in silence t and in darkness , stre ched forth the world of eter n d a . Its nal real being silence was resounding, i its darkness was gleam ng, eternal , joyous life a o n be t c nsta tly like breakers , upon the hard rocks of the impenetrable wall . But deaf was my con i sne sc ou s s and silent my thought . From beneath the weak legs of Thought there came M emo ry and it hung suspended in the void , immovable , h b e paralyzed for the moment . W at did I leave hind the wall of my Unconsciousness ?

Thought made no reply . It was motionless , empty and silent . Two silences surrounded Me , two darknesses enveloped me . Two walls were al burying me , and behind one , in the p e move ment of shadows , passed their human life , while —i behind the other, n silence and in darkness stretched forth the world of my real , eternal being. Wh ence shall I hear The Call ? Whither can I take a step ? And at that moment I suddenly heard the voice of n t s a man , stra ge and distan It grew clo er and 1 32 ’ Satan s Diary

closer, there was a gentle ring in it . It was Mag fio r nus speaking . With great e t and concentra t tion, I tried to catch the words and this was wha I heard “ ’ li And wouldn t you rather continue ving, W ondergo od ?

1 8 March .

Rome , Palazzo Orsini . It is three days now that Magnus and Maria are living in my palazzo in Rome . It is empty l i and silent and rea ly seems huge . Last n ght, worn by insomnia , I wandered about its halls and rw stai ays , over rooms I had never seen before ’ s oul and their number astonished me . Maria s has expelled from it all that was frivolous and im pure and only the saintly Toppi moves through its emptiness , like the pendulum of a church clock .

ai . Ah, how s ntly he looks If not for his broad th e back, broad folds of his coat , and the odor of fur in his head , I myself would take him for one of the saints who have honored me with their acquaintance . n I rarely see my guests . I am tur ing my entire estate into cash and Magnus and Toppi and all the secretaries are busy with this work from morning to night ; our telegraph is constantly buzzing. Magnus has little to say to me . He only 1 33 ’ Satan s Diary

a talks business . Mari it seems as if I were n s e avoiding her . I ca e her through my window r walking in the garden , and this is quite enough fo me s ou l , for her is here and every atom of th e air l is filled with her breath . And , as I have a ff ready remarked , I su er with insomnia . ou a As y see , my friend , I h ve remained among livin ri the g, a dead hand could not possibly w te even the dead words I am not setting down . Let us forget the past , as sweethearts would who have f just settled their di ferences . Let us be friends , ! you and I . Give me your hand , my friend I vow by eternal salvation that never again will I chase you hence or laugh at you : if I have lost th e wis dom of the snake I have acquired the gentleness of the dove . I am rather sorry that I have driven away my painters and my inte rviewers : I have no one to inquire whom I r es emble with my radi ant countenance ? I personally feel that I re mind one o f a powdered darkey, who is afraid to rub the powder o ff with his sleeve and thus reveal ! his black skin ah , I still have a black skin alive Yes , I have remained but I know not yet how far I shall succeed in keeping up this state have you any idea how hard are the transitions a from a nomad to a settled life ? I was redskin , o ff a carefree nomad , who folds up and casts all la that is human , as he would a tent . Now I am y 1 34

’ Satan s Diary

l all l shou d not I, traversing the ages of man , ike th e o the seasons of year, gr w to be a gray old th sage , a wise guid e and teacher, e bearer of the ? o covenant and arterio sclerosis Ah, this ridi ulou s —it sclerosis , these ills of old age is only i now that they beg n to seem terrible to Me , but , can I not get used to them and even grow to love . them ? Every one says it is easy to get used to l ’ ife . Well, I, too , will try to get used to it . Every thing here is so well ordered that after rain comes is sunshine and dries him who wet , if he has not been in too great a hurry to die . Everything here is s o well ordered that there is not a single dis i d ! ease for wh ch there is no cure . This is so goo be One may ill all the time , provided there is a drug store nearby ! At l o any rate , I have my ittle door, my se r exit, my narrow, wet , dark corridor, beyond are the stars and all the breadth of my ! space My friend, I want to be frank there is a ce rtain characteristic of insu tion in me , and it is that I fear . What is or a catarrh of the stomach ? But it is pos t n o re hat I may suddenly refuse to cough, for a s on r o ff ! at all, or for some t ivial cause , and run to I like you at this moment . I am quite ready but conclude a long and fast alliance with you , s omething may suddenly gleam across your dear 1 36 ’ Satan s Diary

do face which no , it is quite impossible to without a little secret door for him who is s o ! t capricious and insubordinate Unfor unately, I —an am proud , too , old and well known vice of ! fi Satan Like a sh struck in the head , I am dazed by my human existence . A fatal unconsciousness is driving me into your life , but of one thing I am r am quite certain : I am of the race of the f ee . I r ler of the tribe of the u s . I come from those who transform their will into laws . Conquered kings are taken into captivity but conquered kings never e become slaves . And when I shall perceive , abov my head, the whip of a dirty guard and my fet tered hands are helpless to avert the blow well : shall I remain living with welts upon my b ack ? Shall I bargain with my judges about an other blow of the whip ? Shall I kiss the hand of the executioner ? Or shall I send to the druggist for an eye lotion ? e No , let not Magnus misjudge me for a littl slip in our agreement : I will live only as long as I

want to live . All the blessings of the human exist ff ence , which he o ered me on that night , when n o Satan was tempted by man, will t strike the weapon from my hand : in it alone is the assur ! ance of my liberty Oh, man , what are all your s kingdom and dukedoms , your knowledge and d your nobility, your gold an your freedom be 1 37 ’ Satan s Diar y hi side t s little, fre e movement of the finger which , in a moment carries you u p to the Throne of Thrones ! M aria!

Yes , I am afraid of her . The look in her eye di is so clear and comman ng, the light of her love c am is so mighty, en hanting and beautiful that I all atremble and everything in me is quivering and urging me to immediate flight . With hitherto nk u nown happiness , with veiled promises , with singing dreams sh e tempts Me ! Shall I cry : — Away o r shall I bend mine to her will and fol low her ? ? o Where I do not kn w . Or are there other worlds beside thos e I know or have forgotten ? Whence comes this motionless light behind my back ? It is growing ever broader an d brighter . s o Its warm touch heats my soul , that its Polar ice crumbles and melts . But I am afraid to look back . I may see Sodom on fire and if I look I may turn into stone . Or is it a new Sun , which I have not yet seen upon this earth that is ri sing behind my back, and I, like a fool , am fleeing from it and baring my back instead of my bre ast to it, r l in the low, dumb neck of a f ightened anima , ste ad of my lofty brow ? Maria ! Will you give me my revolver ? I p

th e . ten dollars for it, together with holster 1 38

’ Satan s Diary

likewise refrain from looking at my face in th e mi : is hi rror it painful to t nk I have a face , which al did s o l can see . Why I fear darkness much at the beginning ? It is so e asy to conce al one self

in it . Apparently all animals experience such lu subtle shame , fear and worriment and s eek s ec

sion when they are changing their skin or hide . n ? e So, I am cha ging my skin Ah , it is the sam , worthless prattle ! The whole troubl e is that I ’ i to M aria s n have fa led escape gaze a d am, ap arentl t th e p y preparing o close the last door, ! door I guarded s o well . But I am ashamed I t l swear by e erna salvation , I feel ashamed , like a

al hi . girl before the altar . I am most blus ng

n : h Blushing Sata no , quiet, quiet e is not here ! Quiet !

Magnus told her everything. She did not reit e r ate that sh e loves Me but looked at me and said “

me . Promise , you will not kill yourself r t The es was in her gaze . You remember how bright it is ? But do not think that I hastily a agreed . Like a s lamander in the fire , I quickly a changed colors . I shall not repe t to you all the

flaming phrases I uttered : I have forgotten them . But you remember how bright and serene Maria ’ s gaze is ? I kissed her han d and said humbly “ Madam ! I do not ask you for forty days and a desert for contemplation : the desert I will find 1 4 0 ’ Satan 8 Diary

myself an d a week is quite enough for me to think

the matter over . But do give me a week and ’ me please, don t look at any more other wise ’ m No , that wasn t what I said . I said it other ’ a words , but it s all the s me . I am now changing my skin . It hurts me . I am frightened and ashamed b ecause any crow might s e e me and come

~ to pick my flesh . What use is there in the fact that there is a revolver in my pocket ? It is only when you learn to hit yourself that you can hit a crow : crows kn ow that and consequently do not fear tragically bulging pockets . Having b eé ome human and descended from above I have become but half a man . I entered upon this human existence as if into a strange element, but I have not lost myself in it entirely I stil l cling with one hand to my Heaven and my

eyes are still above the surface. But she com mands me to accept man in his entirety : only he

man : is a who has said never shall I kill myself, a never sh ll I leave life of my own free will . And what about the whip ? These cursed cuts upon my back ? Pride ? ! Oh , Maria , Maria , how terribly you tempt Me I look into the past of this earth and serious myri ads of tragic shadows floating slowly over climes and age s ! Their hands stretch hopelessly 1 4 1 ’ Satan s Diary

into space , their bony ribs tear through the lean ,

thin skin, their eyes are filled with tears , and their e dri s e sighs hav ed up their throats . I e blood and l h madness , violence and fa sehood , I hear t eir o a oaths , which they c nst ntly betray, their prayers i to God , in wh ch , with every word of mercy and h r t . W e forgiveness , they curse their own ear h

ever I look , I see the earth smoking in convulsion ;

no matter in which direction I strain my ear, I hear e verywhere unceasing moans : or is the womb of the earth itself filled with moaning ? I s e e r a my iad cups about me, but no matter which

of them my lips may touch , I find it filled with ru st and vinegar : or has man no other drink ? And this is man ? th them em . I knew before . I have seen before But I looked upon them as Augustus did from his

u : Ave a ! box pon the galaxy of his victims , C esar

These who are about to die salute you . And I looked upon them with the eyes of an eagle and b el rele d my wise, au head did not disdain to take notice of their groaning cries even with so much

: a d a r as a nod they c me and is ppea ed , they — marched on in endless procession and endless

f ae - was the indi ference of my C sar like gaze . And

now is it really I who walks on so hastily, playing with the sand of th e arena ? And am I thi a e wh o s dirty, emaciated, hungry sl v lifts his 1 4 2

March 29 R m o e .

UY th e l t t a l l b ackes pain vai ab e , take the d largest brush you can find an , with a l broad ine , divide my life into Yesterday

- da f and To y. Take the sta f of Moses and divide e d the str—am of Time and ry it up clear down to l wi - its bed then on y ll you sense my To day.

A ve Caes ar moritu rus s alu tat , , te !

2 April , Rome .

Pallazzo Orsini . i me I do not want to l e . There is not yet in , a has oh man, any love for you , and if you h ve

tened to open your arms to me, please close them : the time has not yet come for passion t o a l ate embraces . Later, a s me other d te , we shal re embrace , but meanwhile , let us be cold and

mi . strained , like two gentlemen in sfortune I can not s ay that my respect for you has grown to any l d u a e be extent, a though your life an yo r fate h v 1 44 ’ Satan s Diary

come my life and my fate : let th e facts suflice that I have voluntarily placed my neck beneath th e yoke and that one and the same whip are fur s rowing our back .

ffi . Yes , that is quite su cient for the present You have observed that I no longer u s e a super- capital “ ” — in writing the word I ? I have thrown it out together with the revolver . This is a sign of sub ? mission and equality . You understand Like a al u king, I have taken the oath of legiance to yo r constitution . But I shall not, like a king, betray this vow : I have preserved from my former life a respect for contracts . I swear I will be true to

— - your comrades - at hard labor and will not make any attempt to escape alone! fe w For the last nights , before I took this de i i c s on our . , I thought much upon life It is ’ ? ff wretched . Don t you think so It is di icul t and humiliating to be this little thing called man, the ni cun ng and avaricious little worm that crawls , ul t hastily m tiplies itself and lies , urning away its — head from the final blow the worm that no mat ter how much it lies , will perish just the same at the appointed hour . But I will be a worm . Let hi me , too , beget c ldren , let the unthinking foot also cru sh my unthinking head at the appointed —I hour meekly accept all consequences . We are o hi b th of us humiliated, comrade, and in t s alone 1 4 5 ’ Satan s Diary there is some consolation : you will listen to my n —t complaints a d I o yours . And if the matter l should ultimately reach the state of itigation , why the witnesses will all be ready ! That is well When one kills in the public square there are al ways eyewitn esses .

. h e I will lie , if necessary I will not lie in t at fre play of lying with which even prophets lie , but in that enforced manner of lying employed by the him hi rabbit, which compels to de his ears , to be n gray in summer a d white in winter . What can one do when behind eve ry tree a hunter with a rifle is concealed ! This lying may appear to be ignoble from one point of view and may well call c n forth ondem ation up on us , but you and I must

l . s tan de r ive , my friend Let by s accuse us to ’ l their heart s content, but , when necessary, we wi l ! lie like wolves , too we will spring forward, sud denl b a : y, and seize the enemy y the thro t one must an d live , brother, one must live , are we to be held responsible for the fact that there is such great lure and such fine taste in blood ! In reality our neither you nor I are proud of our lying, of cru elt and blo o dthir s ti cowardice or of our y, , our ness is certainly not a matter of conviction . ma But however hideous our life y be , it is still i ? more miserable . Do you agree w th that I do l not ove you yet, oh man , but on these nights I 1 4 6

’ Satan s Diary

l e th e nal his mi whi fi judge is slow about co ng .

But he will never come . I s ay this to you : we are

forever alone with our life . hi c . h s But I a cept t s , too Not yet a th e earth endowed me with my name and I know not who I am : Cain or Ab e l ? But I accept the sac rifice as

I do murder . I am everywhere with you and e v h e e r w re ll . to y I fo ow you , Man Let us weep on gether in the desert, knowing that no e will give heed to us or perhaps some one will ? You s ee you and I are beginning to have faith in ’ some one s Ear and soon I will begin to believe in a triangular Eye it is really impossible e that such a concert should hav no hearer, that such a spectacle should be wasted on the desert air !

n e I think of the fact that o one has yet be aten m , h i e ul and I am afraid . W at w ll b come of my so ’ when some one s grubby han d strik es me on th e ! face . What will become of me For I know that no earthly revenge could return my face to ? me . And what will then become of my soul

I swear I will become reconciled even to this . h Everywhere with you and after you , man . W at is my face when you struck the face Chri st and sp at into his eyes ? Everywhere wi ! And you if necessary, I myself will strike ' Chri st with the hand with which I now write 1 4 8 ’ Satan s Diary

all . go with you to ends , man They beat us and r and they will continue to beat u s . We beat Ch ist l m Ah al hi . will sti l beat , bitter is our life , most unbearable !

hi e a . Only a w le ago, I rej cted your embr ces I e s a : said th y were premature . But now I y let us embrace more firmly, brother, let us cling closely —i s o ri to each other t is painful , so ter ble to be alone in this life when all exits from it are closed . And I know not yet wherein there is more pride

t : and liber y in going away voluntarily, whenever e the one wishes , or in accepting, without resistanc , hand of the executioner ? In calmly placing ’ s hi one hands upon s breast, putting one foot for r an d t a kwa d to wa d , with head proudly ben b c r ,

d ! Do thy uty, executioner Or : “ ’ ” : fire ! Soldiers , here s my breast There is something plastic in this pos e and it pleases me . But still more am I pleased with the fact that once again my greater Ego is rising with

i t . in me at the str king of hi s pose Of course , the executioner will not fail to do his duty and the t soldiers will not lower their rifles , but the impor hi is momen t ant t ng the line , the , when before my very death itself I shall suddenly find my el t l n s f immor a a d broader than life itself. It is 1 49 ’ Satan s Diary

strange , but with one turn of the head , with a phr se , expressed or conceived at the proper ment , I could, so to speak, halt the function my very spirit and the entire operation would pe rformed outside of me . An d when death sh r file have finally performed its of redeemer,

darkness would not eclipse the light , for will have first separated itself from me te r ed a into sp ce , in order to reas where and blaze forth again but where ?

Strange , strange . I sought to escape from — men and found myself at that wall of Uncon scio sn s ! t u e s known only to Satan How impor ant,

! e te . indeed , is the pose I must mak no of that But will the pose be as convincing and will it not a ex ecu lose in plasticity if instead of de th, the tio ner and the firing squad I should be c ompelle

i : to say something else well, something l ke “ ’ ” Here s my face : strike ! I do not kn ow why I am s o concerned

a . 0 face , but it does concern me gre tly I man , that it worries me very much indeed . N mere trifle . I will simply subdue my spirit . them beat me ! When the spirit is crushed the operation is no more painful or humiliating than it would be if I were to beat my overcoat on its hanger . But I have forgotten that I am not alone 1 50

’ Satan s Diary

an d e Magnus heard me in silence , as it s emed

to me, with some inner excitement . He works day al and night, virtu ly knowing no rest, and the com plicated business of the liquidation of my prop e rty is moving forward as rapidly in his hands as

if he had been engaged in such work all hi s life . I lik e his h ero 1 c gesture s an d his contempt for de tails : when he cannot unravel a situation he hurls millions out of the window with th e grace of a an grandee . But he is weary d his eyes s eem larger and darker on the background of his dim n fac e . Only now have I lear ed from Mari a that

he is tortured by frequent headaches . a e My complaints against life , I fe r, hav failed to arouse any particular sympathy on his par t : No matter what the accusations I brought against m n a and the life he leads , Magnus would reply impatiently : “

W onder oo d. Yes , yes , g That is what being a a discov man means . Your misfortune is th t you ered this rather ril s a y aroused . rrifie s at least a part of that which now te you , you fi i e r nt . will speak in quite a d e tone However, I am glad that you have dropped your

you have become , much more nervous and ener B o ur e r getic. ut whence c mes this immeas abl te 1 52 ’ Satan s Diary

u l er ror in your eyes ? Collect yo rse f, Wond good ! ”

I laughed .

am e ll . Thank you . I quit co ected Apparently s lave it is the , in expectation of the whip , who

peers at you from within my eye . Have patience , to a Magnus . I am not quite acclimated the situ ‘ ll no ll e , t tion . Tell me , shall I or sha I be compe d to commit murder ? ” “ ” Quite possibly. ” And can you tell me how this happen s ? Both of us looked simultan eously at his white hands and Magnus replied somewhat ironically “ i w . No , I ll not tell you that But if you wish I will tell you something els e : I will tell you what — it mean s to accept man to the very en d it is this l ? ” that is rea ly worrying you, is it not And with much coolnes s and a sort of secret m as i patience , if another thought were devouring me un his attention , he told briefly of a certain ri willing and ter ble murderer . I do not know whether he was telling me a fact or a dark tale th e created for my personal benefit , but this was

r : sto y It happened long ago . A certain Russian , man i e a political exile , a of w de ducation yet io as e s deeply relig us , often happens in Russia, kato r a f caped from g , and a ter long and painful a n the b w nderi g over Si erian forests, h e found 1 53 ’ Satan s ‘ Diary

- r refuge with some non confo mist s ectarians .

Huge , wooden , fresh huts in a thick forest, sur l c rounded by ta l fen es ; great bearded people , — large ugly dogs something on that order . And his in his very presence , soon after arrival , there was to be performed a monstrous crime : these fl insane mystics , under the in uence of some wild n an religiou s fa aticism , were to sacrifice innocent l i - m amb . e . e to th acco , , upon a home mad altar, e

animen hi . p t of hymns , they were to kill a c ld t all in ai Magnus did not rela e the pa ful det ls , lim iting himself solely to the fact th at it was a seven old an d year boy, in a new shirt, that his young e All th mother witnessed the c remony . e reason able arguments ” all the objections of the exile a that they were about to perform a great s crilege , that not the mercy of th e Lord awaited them but b the terri le tortures of hell, p roved powerless to overcome the fierce and dull stubbornness of the s o hi n fanatic . He fell up n s k ees begged , wept — , and tri ed to seize the knife at that moment the l th e ta victim , stripped , was a ready on ble while the mo th e r was trying desperately to control her tears and cries—but he only succe eded in rousing the mad anger of the fanatics : they threatened to

to o . kill him , Magnus looked at me an d said slowly with a peculiar calm 1 54

’ Satan s Diary

n not a d then tell me about it . You have changed ” us ? your intention , I hope, of remaining with e o He laughed and w nt away, patronizingly p lite . And I remained to think . And so I think where is the bo undary ? I confess that I have begun to fear Magnus somewhat or is this fear one of the gifts of my complete human existence ? But when he speaks to me in this fashion I become animated o e with a strange c nfusion , my eyes mov timidly, my will is bent, as if too great and strange a load

: had been put upon it . Think, man hand with r ev e ren ce and find j oy ev This is not true of me before, but now, in hi man conversation , I perceive that t s can u rth e r f than I in everything. x rien I fear I hate him . If I have not yet e p e a love , I know not h tred either, and it will strange indeed if I should be compelled to be by hating the fath er of Maria ! In what a f ! we do live , man I have just merely mention the name of Maria, her clear gaze has only touch my soul and al ready my hatred of Magnus is tinguish ed (or did I only conjure it up ? ) extinguishe d also is my fear of man and life ? did I merely invent it ) and great j oy, great p e h a s descended upon me . It is as if I were again a white schooner on 1 56 ’ Satan s Diary

glassy o ce an ; as if I held al l an swers 1 n my hand and were merely too lazy to open it and read there if immo r talit r to ah in, as y had retu ned me , no man ! Le u I can speak more , oh, t me press yo r hand ?

A 6 1 91 4 pril , . H e Th e good Toppi approves all my actions . i a . amuses me gre tly, th s good Toppi As I h as com letel e expected, he p y forgotten his tru origin : he regards all my reminders of our of past as jests . Sometimes he laughs but more if r e ten he frowns as he were hurt, for he is ligiou s and considers it an insult to be compared “ ” l : with a horny devi , even in jest he himself is now convinced that devils have horns . His Amer icani sm e , at first pal and weak, like a pencil l sketch, has now become fi led with color, and I, myself, am ready to believe all the nonsense given — out by Toppi as his life it is so sincere and con vinci h n . im g According to , he has been in my service about fifteen years and particularly amus

ing it is to hear his storie s of his youth .

Apparently he , too , has been touched by the charms of M aria : my decision to surrender all my money to her father astonished him much les s h e his t an I xpected . He merely chewed cigar for a moment and asked 1 57 ’ Satan s Diary

An d what will he do with your money ?

I do not know, Toppi . He rai sed his brow and frowned ‘

. W on der You are joking, Mr good?

s ee : i. e You , Toppi just now we , . , Magnus is occupied in converting my estate into gold an d j amming it into banks , in his name , of course . You understand ? “

can il e . How I fa to und rstand, Mr Wonder good ? ” “

e al . These are all preliminary, ssenti steps What may happen further I do not know yet a: ? Oh, you are jesting again t m You must remember, old man , tha I yself did not know what to do with my money . It is n not money that I need but new activity . You u n kn de rs ta d ? But Magnus ows . I do not know yet what hi s plans are but it is what Magnus said ‘ that is important to me : I will compel you to ’ W o n de r o o d ! . work, g Oh, Magnus is a great man t You will see tha for yourself, Toppi Toppi frowned again and replied

! You are ma ster of your money, Mr . Wonder ’ go o df “ e r ! Ah , you have forgotten ve ything, Toppi ’ Do n t you remember about that play? That I wanted to play ? ” 1 58

’ Satan s Diary an d t l spen severa hours in this study. You were ” not at home at that time . “

do . No , I not know We have not spoken about in that, but have no fear : we will find s ometh g for

. : u en the cardinal Confess , old man you are q ite ” chanted with that old monk ey ?

Toppi glan ced at me sharply and sighed . Then he lap—sed into thought and strange as it may seem something akin to a monkey appe ared in ’ his countenance , as in the cardinal s . Later, from e somewher deep within him, there appeared a mi i s . mile It illu ned his hang ng nose , rose to his e n d yes a blazed forth within them in two bright,

l . ittle flames , not devoid of wanton malice I looked at him in astonishment and even with j oy : um yes that was my old Toppi , risen from his h an e grave . I am convinc d that his hair again has th e smell of—fur instead of oil ! Gently I k—issed his brow old habits cannot be rooted out an d exclaimed “ ! what was You are enchanting, Toppi But it that gave you such j oy ? ’ “ I waited to see whether he woul d show Maria to the cardinal ? ” Well ? ” He did not ! Well ?

But Toppi remained silent . An d as it had 1 60 ’ Satan s Diary

did the mil : fi come so s e disappear, slowly at rst the hanging nose grew pale and became quite in at am hi his distinct, then all once the fl es wit n —an d eyes went out again the old dejection, sour ness and odor of church hypocrisy buried him who had been resurrected for a moment . It would have been useless to trouble th e ashe s with fur ther questions . t This happened yes erday . A warm rain fell during the day but it cleared up towards evening and ff Magnus , weary and apparently su ering with ri headache , suggested that we take a de into the ff rac Campagna . We left our chau eur behind, a p du tice peculiar to all our intimate trips . His b i extraor din ties were performed y Magnus , w th

. i ary skill and daring On this occasion , h s usual daring reached the point of audacity : despite the

- ever thickening twilight and the muddy road , Magnus drove the automobile at such mad speed that more than once did I look up at his broad,

: motionless back . But that was only at first the presence of Maria , whom I supported with my arm (I do not dare s ay embraced ! ) soon brought e me to the loss of all my senses . I cannot describ — — it all to you s o that you woul d really feel it the th aromatic air of e Campagna , which caressed my face , the magnificence an d charm of our arrow like speed, my virtual loss of all sens ation of ma 1 61 ’ Satan s Diary terial weight , of the complete disappearance of bo d a y, when I felt myself Speeding thought, a

flying gaz e .

M aria But still less can I tell you of . Her Ma d hi in onna gaze w tened the twilight, like marble ; lik e the mysterious silence and perfect beauty of marble was her gentle , sweet and wise silence . I barely touched her slender, supple figure , but if I had been embracing within the hollow of my hand the entire firmness of earth an d sky I could not have felt a more complete mastery of the whole wo rld! Do you know what a line is in measure

_ ? No —is th a ? was ment t much, t not so And it only by th e measure of a line that Maria bent h er — e ! But divine form to me no , no mor than that l s a s un mi what wou d you y, man , if the , co ng down from its course just one lin e were to come clo s er to you by that distance ? Would you not consider it a miracle ? t th My e xis ence seemed unbounded , like e uni n e e verse , which k ows n ither your tim nor dis n me ta ce . For a moment there gleamed before c the wall of my un onsciousness , that unconquer able barrier against which the Spirit o f him who h as a —an d donned the human form beats in v in , e as quickly did it disapp ar : it was swallowed, “

’ o s with ut ound or conflict, by the waves of my new e d th e s a Even higher they ros e, enshrou ing 1 62

’ Satan s Diary

i . daring magination Moreover, a gentleman feels ill at ease in speaking of his succes s with the

: ladies . Besides , it was time to return on the hills the lights of Tivoli were already gleaming and

Magnus reduced hi s speed . We were moving quite slowly on the return trip hi s and Magnus , grown merry, wiping brow with hi k s hand erchief, now and then addressed brief l remarks to us . There is one thing I wi l not con ceal : her unquestionable womanliness emphasizes the completeness of my transformation . As we mi walked up the broad stairs of my palazzo , a d its princely wealth and beauty, I suddenly thought “ Why not send all this adventure to the devil ? Why not simply wed and live lik e a prince in this ? i n palace There w ll be freedom, childre , laugh ter, just earthly happiness and love .

An d again I looked at Magnus . He seemed “ ” strange to me : I will take your money ! Then I — s aw the stern gaze of my Maria and the contra hi diction between her love and t s plan of simple , modest happiness was s o great and emphatic that my thought did not even require an answer . I now recollect this thought accidentally as a cu ri “ ” i T i m To ism o s ty of opp s . Let me call it pp in honor of my perfect Toppi . At ’ Th e evening was charming. Magnus t e quest, Maria sang. You canno imagin the r 1 64 ’ Satan s Diary erence with which Toppi listened to her singing !

He dared not utter a word to Maria , but on leav ing he shook my hand long and with particular warmth . Then , similarily, he shook the hand of

to . Magnus . I also rose retire “ ? Do you intend to do some work yet, Magnus ’

0 . N Don t you want to go to sleep , Wonder ’ In good ? Come to my room . We ll chat a bit .

cidentall . y, there is a paper for you to sign Do ” you want an y wine ? “ i Oh, w th pleasure , Magnus . I love conversa tion at night .

We drank the wine . Magnus , whistling some hi thing out of tune, silently walked the carpet, w le

I, as usual, reclined in a chair . The Palazzo was lik all silence , e a sarcophagus , and this reminded me of that stirring night when Mad Mars raved behind the wall . Suddenly, Magnu s exclaimed i loudly, w thout hesitation “ afiair i The is progressing splend dly. So ? ”

In two weeks everything will be completed . hi Your swollen, scattered wealth, in w ch one can wi be lost as in a wood, ll be transformed into a clear, concise and exact sack of gold to be — more correct into a mountain . Do you know the ” W onder o o ? exact estimate of your money, g d 1 65 ’ Satan s Diary

’ ’ k i . . t to t Oh , don t, Magnus I don t wan now ’ ” it s . Moreover, your money Magnus looked at me quickly and said s harply : “ ’ ” No , it s yours .

I shrugged my shoulders . I did not want to argue . It was s o quiet and I s o enj oyed watch ing this strong man silently pacing to and fro . b e I still remembered his motionless , stern back, o n hind which I could clearly s ee hi s heart . He c tinu e d 3 , after a pause “ n onde r o od Do you k ow, W g , that the Cardinal ” h as been here ? “ Y s ? e . The old monkey , I know What did he want ? ” ‘ The same thing . He wanted to s e e you but I

! did not feel like taking you away from your ” thoughts . “ nk Tha s . Did you drive him out ? Magnus replied angrily “ — ’ I am sorry to say, no . Don t put on airs , W onde r go o d : I have already told you that we must be care ful of him as long as we remain here .

ri . a But you are quite ght He is an old , sh ven , ! ” useless , evil , gluttonous , cowardly monkey “ h ! him ? ” Ah, a Then why not show the door ’ Impossible . o s hi I believe you , Magnus . And what d e t s 1 66

’ Satan s Diary

to o l I, , shall a ways find something to do beside you at any rate this will be much better ix than my brainless old women and s secretaries . li a Why do you refuse to be eve in my modesty, s

I believe in your genius . Imagine that I m a come from some other planet , from Mars , for instance, and wish in the most serious manner pos to man sible, pass through the experience of a . ! ” It is all very simple , Magnus Magnus frowned at me for a few moments and suddenly broke into laughter “ You certainly are a pilgrim from some other W on de r o o d ! planet, g And what if I should devote your gold to doing evil ? ” “ Why ? Is th at s o very interesting ? Hm ! You think that is n ot~ intere sting?

s o . Yes , and do you You are too big a man to do little evil , just as billions constitute too much as money, while honestly far as great evil is con reat evil ? cerned, I know not yet what g is Per haps it is really great go o d? In my recent con tem lation s e a p , there cam to me strange — thought : Who is of greater us e to man h e wh o ? hates or he who loves him You see , Magnus , how ignorant I still am of human affairs and ” how ready I am for almost anything . me Without laughter and , with what seemed to , his extreme curiosity, Magnus measured me with 1 68 ’ Satan s Diary

: 1 8 hi eyes , as if he were deciding the question t s e a fool I s e before me , or the foremost sage of America ? Judging by his subsequent question he was nearer the second opinion s So , if I have correctly understood your word , ” n hin W onder oo d ? o t . you are afraid of g, Mr g “ ” hin n o I t k t. An d murder many murders ? You remember the point you made in your story about the boy of the boundary of th e hu ? ma man In order that there y be no mistake , il I have moved it forward s everal k ometers . Will that be enough ? ” Something like respect arose in Magnus ’ eyes him con sid the devil take , though , he really ! ers me a clod Continuing to pace the room , he looked at me curiously several times , as if he were trying to recall and verify my remark . Then , with a quick movement, he touched my shoulders “ is i W on der o o d. You have an active m nd , g It

a pity I did not come to know you before . ( C ” W hY?

Just s o . I am interested to know how you will speak to the king : he will probably suggest

something very evil to you . And great evil is ” great good . Is that not s o ? He again broke into laughter and Shook his hi head in a friendly fas on . 1 69 ’ Satan s Diary

’ I don t think s o . The chances are he will pro ” pose something very silly . “ Hm ! And is that n ot great wisdom ? He laughed again but frowned suddenly and added “ : onder o o seriously Do not feel hurt, W g d. I liked what you said very much and it is well you do not put any questions to me at this time : I could not answer them just now . But there is something I can s ay e ven now in general ” c ? terms , of ourse . Are you listening ‘ ” I am all attention .

Magnus seated himself opposite me and , tak s i n ing a p of wine , asked with stra ge seriousness How do you regard explosives ? ” ” With great respect . ? sa Yes That is cold praise , but, I dare y, they ’ don t deserve much more . Yet, there was a time when I worshiped dynamite as I do frankness this scar on my brow is the result of my de youthful enthusiasm . Since then I have ma great strides in chemistry—and other things

and this has cooled my zeal . The drawback of

every explosive , beginning with powder, is that the explosion is confined to a limited space and strikes only the things near at hand : it might do but it d e for war, of course , is quite ina equate wher

r . bigger things a e concerned Besides , being a a n thing of material limit tions , dy amite or powder 1 70

’ Satan s Diary

An d the crux of the matter lies , you understand, h w in o to load the shell and, what is still more

: to . important how explode it You know, of th e course , that method of exploding various preparations depends upon their respective com positions ? ’ I am not going to repeat here the lecture on ex plosives given me by Magnus with great zeal and enthusiasm : it was the first time I had seen him in such a state of excitement . Despite the ab sorbing interest of the subject , as my friends the l s journa ists would say, I heard only half the thing he was saying and concentrated most of my atten hi tion on his skull, the skull w ch contained such an k wide and d gerous nowledge . Whether it was ’ due to the conviction carried in Magnus words , — — or to pure weariness I know n ot which this wi m his round skull, blazing th the fla es of eyes , e x gradually assumed the character of a real , lit ao plosive shell , of a bomb , with the fuse for tion . I trembled when Magnus carelessly threw upon the table a heavy object resembling a

- a invol cake of grayish yellow so p , and exclaimed untari ly : “ What ’ s that ?

It looks like soap or wax . . But it has the force s of a devil . One half of thi would be enough to ’ l t . It a b ow St . Peter s in o bits is capricious 1 72 ’ Satan s Diary

Devil. You may kick it about or chop it into re pieces , you may burn it in your stove , it will main e ver silent : a dynamite shell may tear it apart yet it will not rouse its wrath . I may throw it into the street , beneath the hoofs of horses ; the dogs may bite at it and children may play with — it and still it remains indifferent . But I need only apply a current of high pressure to it—and the force of the explosion will be monstrous , lim l ! it e s s . A strong but silly devil

With equal carelessness , bordering almost upon contempt, Magnus threw his devil back into the table drawer and looked at me sternly. My eye brows twitched slightly : “ an d I see you know your subject to perfection ,

I rather like this capri cious devil of yours . But man I would like to hear you discuss . Magnus laughed “ And was it not of him I have just spoken ? Is not the history of this piece of soap the history of man your , who can be beaten , burned , hacked to bits , hurled beneath the hoofs of horses , thrown — his to the dogs , torn into shreds without rousing consuming wrath or even his anger ? But prick — him with s ome thing and the explosion will be ” . W der on ood. terrible as you will learn , Mr g He laughed again and rubbed his white hands with pleasure : he scarcely remembered at that 1 73 ’ Satan s Diary

moment that human blood was alre ady upon them . And is it really necessary for man to remember that ? After a pause commensurate with the r e spect due to the subject , I asked “ And do you know how to make a man ex plode ? “ Certainly . And would you consider it permissible to give me this information ? ” “ Unfortunately it is not so easy or convenient because th e current of high pressure would r e ” de o W on r od. quire too much elucidation , dear g Can ’ t you put it briefly ? ri a Oh , b efly . Well, it is necess ry to promise ” n mira l ma some c e . “ ” Is that all ?

That is all . Lies once more ? The old monkey ? It Yes , lies again . But not the old monkey . is not that I have in mind . Neither cru sades nor immortality in heaven . This is the period of e other miracles and other wonders . He promis d resurrection to the dead . I promise resurrection to the living . His followers were the dead . Mine — ” ours are the living . n t ar th e But the dead did o is e . How about living ? “ n t Who knows ? We mus t make a exp erimen . 1 74

a ? W e l this pl net will give it a little ho iday. But it ! ” enough jesting . I do not like He frowned e ro angrily and looked at me sternly, lik an old p f e s s o r the manner of this gentleman was fli n not distinguished by pp a cy. When it seemed to him that I had grown sufficiently serious he “ shook his head in approval and asked : Do you W onder o o d a know, g , th t the whole of Europe is now in a very uneasy state ? ” ‘ C , 7 W ar ? l Possibly war. Everybody is secret y expect B u t th e ing it . war precedes the belief in king miracles dom of . You understand : we have lived ic too long in simple faith in the multipl ation table , we we are tired of the multiplication table , are filled with ennui an d anxiety on this straight road mi whose re is lost in infinity . Just now all of us are demanding some miracle and soon the day will come when we will demand th e miracle im mediately ! It is not I alone who wants an cap eri — men t on a large s cale the whole world is prepar W onde r o od ing it ah , g , in truth , life would not be worth the candle if it were not for these highly interesting moments ! Highly interest ” ! u is ing He greedily r bbed h hands . You are pleased ? ” l re . a As a chemist, I am in ecstasy My she ls l t con alre ady oaded, without being hemselves 1 76 ’ Satan s Diary h it ll Scious of t e fac t, but they will know we e nough when I apply the torch . Can you imagine

the sight when my dynamite will begin to explode , it its consciousness , its will, s eyes directed straight upon its goal ? ” “ And blood ? Perhaps my reminder is out of place but I remember an occasion when you Spoke ” of blo o d with much excitement . Magnus fixed his long gaze upon me : something akin to suffering appeared in his eyes : But this was not the prick of conscience or pity—it was the emotion of a mature and wrs e man whos e thoughts had been interrupted by the foolish ques “ ” “ ” i : ai ? t on of a child Blood, he s d , what blood I recalled to him his words on that occasion and told him of my strange and extremly unpleasant l d dream about the bottles , fil ed with blood instea

s o . of wine , and easily broken Weary, with his e to yes closed, he listened my tale and sighed

” — “ ’ Blood ! h e murmured : blood ! that s non t sense . I old you many trite things on that occa W on der o o d t sion , g , and it is not wor h while to i . th s recall them However, if gives you fear, it is not too late. I replied resolutely o thin A s n . I fear g I have already said , I ll i m sha follow you everywhere . It s y blood that 1 77 ’ Sr atan s Diary — — is protesting you understan d? not my con i n s c ou s e s s or will . Apparently I shall be the first

be e : n o to fool d by you I, too , seek a miracle . Is t your M aria a miracle ? I have been repeating th e multiplication table night and day an d I have grown to hate it like the b ars of a prison . From mi e the point of view of your che stry, I am quit loaded and I ask but on e thing : blow me up as ” quickly as possible ! Magnus agreed ste rnly “

l . Very we l In about two weeks . Are you satisfied ? ” “ n rin Th ank you . I hope that Sig o a Maria will then become my wife ? ”

Magnus laughed . “ Madonna ? ” ’ n il Oh, I don t understa d your sm e and , a I must s y, my hope is altogether in conformity th with e regard I bear for your daughter, Signor ” Magnus . “ ’ n er d W o d o o . Don t excite yourself , g My smile was not about Maria but about your faith in mir

W onde r o o d. acles . You are a splendid fellow, g

I am beginning to love you like a son . In two weeks you wil l receive everything and then we

a . shall conclude a new and strong p ct Your hand, comrade ! ”

For the first time he shook my hand in a strong, 1 78

’ Satan s Diary

duced h e— u — ourselves , his adj tant, I Thoma s

Magnus . I confess I had not a very flattering Opinion of the former king and that is why he astonished me i all the more with his h gh opinion of himself . He gave me his hand politely but with such haughty f indi ference , he looked at me with such complete

- confidence as a self , if he were g zing at a being of d s o a lower or er , he walked ah ead of me naturally, s at down without invitation , gazed upon the walls n and fur iture in such frankly royal manner, that my entire uneasiness due to my unfamiliarity with as nl etiquette disappeared immediately. It w o y wh o necessary to follow this fellow, appeared to l a was know everything s o we l . In appe rance he an d quite a young man, with fresh complexion f suf magnificent coi fure , somewhat worn out but

ficientl - y well preserved , with colorless eyes and s a calm, brazenly protruding lower lip . His hand l were beautiful . He did not try to concea that he a was bored by my American face , which appe red wi an d me Je sh to him , by the necessity of asking for money : he yawned slightly after seating him self and said

Sit down , gentlemen . And with a slight command of the hand he or dered the adjutant to state the nature of his pro t at all and pos al. H e paid no a tention to Magnus , 1 80 ’ Satan s Diary

a ta t was while the fat, red and obliging dju n “ stealthily narrating the story of the misunder ” standing which caused the departure of His Majesty from his country—His Majesty was non h al n tl hi c a y examining s feet . Finally, he inter ’ rupted his representative s speech with the im patient remark “ nder o o . W o d Briefer, Marquis . Mr g is as well familiar with this history as we are . In k a word, these fools icked me out . How do you ” W onder o o d ? regard it, dear g “ ” How do I r egard it ? I bowed low

I am glad to be of service to Your Majesty . ’ ll all . Well, yes , that s what they say But wi

? . you give me any money Continue, Marquis

The Marquis , smiling gently at me and Magnus (despite hi s obesity he looked quite hungry) con tinued to weave his thin flimsy web about the mis k e understanding, until the bored ing again int r

You understand : these fools thought that I ’ was responsible for all their misfortunes . Wasn t l W onde r o o d ? that sil y, Mr . g And now they are ‘ o fi : worse than ever and they write Come back , ’ hi ! ’ for God s sake . We are peris ng Read the letters , Marquis .

At first the king spoke with a trace of e xcit e-z fi ment but apparently any e ort soon wearied him. 1 81 ’ Satan s Diary The Marquis obediently took a packet of papers from the portfolio and tortured us with the com th e plaints of orphaned subjects , begging their l o rd to return . I looked at the king : he was no less bored than we were . It was s o clear to him that the people could not exist without him that all confirmations of this seemed superfluous . And I felt s o strange : whence does this miserable man get so much happy confidence ? There was no u doubt that this bird , unable to find a cr mb for hi l mse f, sincerely believed in the peculiar quali s e tie of his personage , capabl of bestowing upon a whole people marvelous benefactions . Stupid ity ? Training ? Habit ? At that moment the mar quis was re ading the ple a of some correspondent , f a in which , through the web of o fici l mediocrity and the lies of swollen phrases , gleamed the very sam e confidence an d sincere call . Was that , too , stupidity and habit ? “ ” An s o d o forth , and s forth , interrupted the “ ui king listlessly : that will do , Marq s , you may , l i s . clo e your portfolio Wel , what you th nk of it, ” W o nder o o d ? dear Mr . g “ I will be bold enou gh to s ay to Your Majesty that I am a representative of an old, democratic republic and “ W on der o o d ! ! Stop , g Republic, democracy ’ e . That s nons ense . You know w ll enough yourself 1 82

’ Satan s Diary

ever thin W onder o od King can do y g, g , you under stand ? ” “ But the law law Ah , this fellow, too, speaks of . Do you ’ ? a hear, Marquis No , I really can t underst nd what you want this law for ! That all may suffer ! equitably However, if you are so keen on hav law ing , law you shall have . But who will give it ? ” to you , if not I “ But the representatives of the people

The king directed his colorless eyes upon me , almost in despair : ’ Ah a i ! ou un , ga n citizen A and B But can t y der s tan d W onder o od ? , dear g What kind of a law is it if they themselves make it ? What wise ’ a e ? . man will gree to ob y it No , that s nonsense

Is it possible that you yourself obey this law, W on dergo o d ? “ t th e le Not only I, Your Majes y, but who of A merica .

His eyes measured me with symp athy . “ ’ l Pardon me , but I don t believe it . The who e ’ of America ! Well, in that case they simply don t — a understand what law is do you hear, M rquis , ’ the whole of America ! But that s not the thing. ’ r d onde o od. u a I must return , W g Yo ve he r what ” th e poor devils write ? 1 84 ’ Satans Diary

I am happy to s e e that the road is open for you, my lord . “ ! Open ? You think s o ? Hm No , I need ’ money. Some write and others don t, you under stand ? “ ’ Perhaps they don t know how to write , my lord ? ” I “ They ? Oh ! You should have seen what they

flu s tered. a wrote against me . I was quite Wh t ” they need is the firing squad . “ All of them ? ” Why all of them ? Some of them will be c enough . The rest of them will simply be s ared W on der o o d to death . You understand , g , they have simmy stolen my power from me and now, of course , will simply refuse to return it . You ’ can t expect me to s e e to it that no one robs me . ’ —h e And these gentlemen , indicated the blush ing Marquis—“ to my sorrow did not manage to ” guard my interests . The Marquis mumbled confusedly Sire ! ” bu Now, now, I know your devotion , t you were asleep at the switch just the same ? And now ” s ! —h e there is so much trouble , o much trouble “ sighed lightly . Did not Cardinal X . tell you I W onder o o d? needed money, Mr . g He promised to . Of cour se I wil l return it all an d how 1 85 ’ Satan s Diary

ul ever, you sho d take this matter up with the Mar quis . I have he ard that you love pe ople very ” W onder o much, Mr . g od ? A faint smile flitted over the dim face of Mag nus . I bo wed slightly .

The Cardinal told me so . That is very praise W on de r o o . worthy, Mr . g d But if you do love i ’ people you will certa nly give me money. I don t doubt that in the least . They must have a king. r The newsp apers a e merely prattling nonsense . in Why do they have a king in Germany, a k g in l England, a king in Ita y, and a hundred other ’ ” kings ? An d don t we need a king too ? The adjutant mumbled A misunderstanding i ui Of course a m sunderstanding. The Marq s Th r e olu is quite right . e newspape rs call it a v tion , but believe me , I know my people ; it is sim ply a misunderstanding. They are now weeping

with out ~ a themselves . How can they get along king ? There would be no kings at all then . You understand ? What nonsense ! They now talk of no God, too . No , we must do a little shooting, a ” little shooting ! He rose quickly an d this time shook my han d with a patronizing smile and bowed to Magnus . “ - - b b W onde r o o d. Good y, good y, my dear g a fi . You have a magni cent figure Oh, what 1 86

’ Satan s Diary

How old is this creature ? ’ ’ ? W onder oo d? Didn t you know, g That s had. ” is 32 He years old . Perhaps less . “ Did the Cardinal really speak of him and ask ” you to give him mo ney ? “ — Yes , from what you may have left after the ’ ” i al Card n s wants are attended to . “ That is probably due to the fact that the monarchist form of government is also in vogue in heaven . Can you conceive of a republic of saints and the administration of the world on the basis of popular representation ? Think of it ' even devils will then receive the vote . A King is ” r W on der o o d . most necessa y, g . Believe me “ ” Nonsense ! This is not worthy even of a jest .

I am not jesting . You are mistaken . And

s o di : pardon me for being rect , my friend in his di h e scussion about kings was above you, this time . You saw only a creature , a countenance of H e purely mate rial limitations and ridiculous . conceived himself to be a symbol . That is why he is so calm and there is no doubt that h e will ” return to his beloved people . “ ” And will do a little shooting. l l An d will do a ittle shooting . And wi l throw W on der o o d a little scare into them . Ah , g , how stubbo rn you are in your refus al to part with the multiplication table ! Your republic is a simple 1 88 ’ Satan s Diary

l hi —do l e it ?—is ‘ tab e , w le a king you rea iz a

‘ r l ! n l mi ac e What ca there be simpler, sil ier and h o ele more p s than a million bearded men, gov — erning themselves , and how wonderful , how miraculous when this million of bearded fellows are governed by a creature ! That is a miracle ! And what possibilities it gives rise to ! It seemed very funny to me when you spoke with s o much warmth about the law, this dream of the devil . A king is necessary for the precise purpose of breakin r wil e g the law, in order that the l may b ” above the law ! “ n But laws cha ge , Magnus . To change is only to submit to necessity and

law hi . to new , w ch was unknown to you before will Only by breaking the law do you elevate the . Prove to me that God himself is subject to his own i e . . t r laws , , to put it simply, tha he cannot pe form

- a l miracles , and to morrow your sh ven monkey wil share the fate of loneliness and all the churches will be turned into horse stables . The miracle , W onder o o d t e — w g , h miracle that is hat holds human beings on this cursed earth ! ” Magnus emphasized these words by banging th e wi . table th his fist His face was gloomy. In his dark eyes there flickered unusual excitement . as h e n Speaking if were threatening some o e, h e

£1 89 ’ Satan s Diary

H e l mi him be ieves in racles and I envy . He is is c insignifi ant, he is really what you might call a creature , but he believes in miracles . And he has al ready been a king and will b e a king again ! And we ! He waved his han d contemptuously and began to pace the carpet like an angr y captain the deck of his vessel . With much respect I gazed upon

e an a : his heavy, explosive h ad d bl zing eyes for the first time I realized what Satan ic ambitions l there were concea ed in this strange gentlemen . “ And we Magnus noticed my gaze and shouted angrily “ Wh y do you look at me like that, Wonder ’ good ? It s silly ! You are thinking of my ambi ’ ? on der o o d ! n o t tion That s foolish , W g Would ou l y , a gentleman of Illinois , a so like to be Rus s ia e will well, at least, Emperor of , wher the ” is still above the law ? “ And on what particular throne have you your ” ? a eye , Magnus I replied , no longer conce ling my irony . If you are pleased to think of me so flatter in l W onde r o od aim g y, g , I will tell you that I much ! l higher . Nonsense , my friend Only b oodless o as moralists have never dreamt of a cr wn , just only eunu' chs have never tempted themselves with ! th e thought of woman . Nonsense But I do not 1 90

’ Satan s Diary

Th e di l m r money is at your sposa , y dea ” friend. l e at Magnus ook d me thoughtfully. “ ’ ” It s t not wor h while , he decided . This mir ff e acl e is old stu . It requir s too many police to l compe belief . We shall perform a better miracle . “ Oh . ll i , undoubtedly We sha contr ve a better ? device . In two weeks “ ” Y e s t ! l , about hat rep ied Magnus cordially. We shook hands warmly in parting and in about two hours the gracious king sent each of u s a decoration : some sort of a sta r for me and some thing else for Magnus . I rather pitied th e poor i idiot who cont nued to play his lone hand .

A l 1 6 e . pri , Rom Mari a is somewhat indisposed and I hardly e nf l — s e her. Magnus i ormed me of her il ness and lied about it : for some reason he does n ot want ? me to s ee her . Does he fear anything

Again Cardinal X . called on him in my absence . “ ” Nothing is being said to me about the miracle . — But I am patient, and I wait . At first this was rather boresome but re cently I have found a new pastime an d now I am quite content . It is the Roman museums , where I spend my mornings , like a conscientious American who has just 1 92 ’ Satan s Diary learne d to distinguish between a p ainting and a B ae decke r wi piece of sculpture . But I have no th me and I am strangely happy that I don ’ t under

stand a thing about it all : marble and painting .

I merely like it . Wh I like the odor of the s ea in the museums . y — the sea ? I do not know : the s e a is far away and

‘

I rather expected the odor of decay . And it is — s o spacious here much more spacious than the e e Campagna . In the Campagna I s only space , u over which r n trains and automobiles . Here I s ! swim in time . There is o much time here Then, rv too, I rather like the fact that here they prese e with great care a chip of a marble foot or a stony i s ole with a bit of the heel . Like an ass from Ill a t nois , I simmy c nnot unders and what value there hi but is in t s , I already believe that it is valuable an d I am touched by your careful thrift , little man ! Preserve it ! Go on breaking the feet of

. t live men That is nothing. But these you mus preserve . It is good , indeed , when living, dying, 2000 r ever changing men , for the space of yea s , take such good care of a chip of marble fo ot . When I enter the narrow museum from the

Roman street, where every stone is drowned in of th e r sun nd the light Ap il , its transparent a e a even Shadow s ems to me peculiar light , more u le t h e d rab han the expensive rays of t sun . A8 1 93 ’ Satan s Diary

far as I recollect it is thus that etern ity doth shine . An d thes e marbles ! They have swallowed as much sunlight as an Englishman whiskey before they were driven into this place that they do n ot

n. h . a fear g t at all And I, too , do not fe r the night when I am near them . Take care of man ! them, thi rt an as s If s is what you call a , what you are ,

W d r o d on e o . e g Of cours , you are cultured , you look upon art with reverence as upon religi on and you have understood as much of it as that as s did on which the Messiah entered Jerusalem . And what if there should be a fire ? Yesterday this thought troubled me all day and I went with it to

re d Magnus . But he seems extremely o ccup with hi an d l a somet ng cou d not, at first, underst nd what s I wa driving at . “ ’ Wh W on der ood? at s the trouble , g You want — to insure the Vatican o r something else ? Mak e it cle arer ? “ ” Oh ! to insure ! I exclaimed in anger : you ” a ! are a barbarian , Thom s Magnus

At last he understood . Smiling cordially, he

t e . stre ch d , yawned and laid some paper before me “ a You really are a gentleman from Mars , de r ’ W onder oo d. a t and S n s g Don t contr dic , ig thi ” a h e . p per. It is t last one 1 94

’ Satan s Diary

a I— r th t bowed pa ticularly low and politely. But h e restrained me with a gracious gesture, point ing to a chair W on de r Where are you going, go o d? Sit down . We have seen so little of each other of ” late . How is your health ? “

. An Fine , thank you d how is the health of Signorina Maria ? ” “ ’ l . A Not particu arly good But it s a trifle . few more days of waiting and you So you l W onder oo d ? a ike the museums , g There was t n d ime when I, too , gave them much time a feel ’ ‘ ing. Yes , I remember, I remember . Don t W onder o od a you find , g , that man , in mass , is repulsive being ? ” I raised my eyes in astonishment I do not quite understand this change o f sub th ect . j , Magnus On e contrary, the museums have revealed to me a new an d more attractive side of man .

He laughed .

“ ‘ ? ell well Love for mankind W , , do not fi nder o e e n s e W o od. s take o e at the jest, g You e—verything that man does in crayon is wonderful but repulsive in painting . Take the sketch of

Christianity, with its sermon on the Mount , its l a ! ilies and its e rs of corn , how marvelous it is n A d how ugly is its picture with its sextons , its 1 96 ’ Satan s Diary

be funeral pyres and its Cardinal X . ! A genius

an t . gins the work and an idiot, animal , comple es it The pure and fresh wave of the ocean tide strikes — a the dirty shore and returns dirty, bearing b ck with it corks and shells . The beginning of love , the beginning of the Roman Empire and the great — revolution how good are all beginnings ! An d their end ? An d even if a man here and there h as was r managed to die as beautifully as he bo n, the W onde r o o d masses , the masses , g , invariably end the liturgy in shamelessness “ ? Oh , but what about the causes , Magnus The causes ? Apparently we find concealed bs tanc e l here the very su of man , of animal , evi a and limited in the mass , inclined to m dness , eas ily inoculated with all sorts of disease an d crown ing the widest possible road with a standstill . And that is why Art is so much above Man ! ” “ ” do I not understand . What is there incomprehensible about it ? In art it is the genius who begins and the genius com t . : ! ple es You understand the genius the fool, the imitator or the critic is quite powerless to change or mar the paintings of Velasquez , the t n sculp ure of A gelo or the verse of Homer . He can destroy, smash , break, burn or deface , but he is quite powerless to bring them down to his own — s o a level and that is why he detests re l art . 1 97 ’ Satan s Diary

W onder o od ? You understand, g His paw is help less ! ” hi Magnus waved his w te hand and laughed . “ But why does he guard and protect it s o as s id ou sl u y. “ he wh o s It is not guards and protects . This i ” done by a special species of faithful watchmen —Magnus laughed again “ and did you observe ” how uncomfortable they feel in th e museum ? “ Who—they ? e hi Well , thos who came to view the t ngs ! But the most ridiculous phase of the whole business is not that the fool is a fool but that the genius unswe rvedly worship s the fool as a neighbor and fellow being and anxiously seeks his devastating l hi . e ove As if he were a savag mself, the genius does not understand that his tru e neighbor is a genius similar to himself and he is eternally open — ing his embrace s to th e near human who eagerly crawls into them in order to abstract the a his ! a w tch from vest pocket Yes , my de r Won der o o d an d g , it is a most laughable point I fear . o He lapsed into th ught, fixing his eyes upon the floor : thus apparently do human beings gaze into the depth s o f their own graves . And I understood just what this genius feared , and once again I bowed before the S atan ic mind which in all the 1 98

’ Satan s Diary iseum in the very place where martyrs used to , — die but I do not know why we did not do it I b e f lieve there were technical di ficulties . And how Splendid Toppi was ! At first he drank long and

i . silently, l ke an archbishop Then he suddenly began to perform interesting feats . He put a his r u bottle of Chianti on nose , the wine nning all over him . He tried to perform some tricks with cards but was immediately caught by the affable b andits who brilliantly repeated the same r e trick . He walked on all fours and sang some i i u cri l g o s verses through his nose . He suddenly announced frankly that he was a We walked home s taggering along the bumping into walls and lampposts and o l u s y enjoying ourselves like two students . tried to pick a quarrel with some p oliceme touched by their politeness , he ended by ri hi r t a ng s ste n blessing upon hem, s yin gloomily “ Go and sin no more . Then he confessed with tears that he was 1 0 love with a certain Signorina, that his requited and that he must therefore l a 1 spiritua c lling . Saying this , he stony threshold and fell into a stubborn s An d f thus I le t him . ri o ! Not Ma a, Maria, how y u tempt me 0 200 ’ Satan s Diary k d have I touched your lips . Yesterday I isse only red wine but whence come these burning traces on my lips ? But yesterday I stood upon my knees , Madonna , and covered you with flowers but yesterday I timidly laid hands upon the hem

- of your garment , and to day you are only a woman and I want you . My hands are trembling. The obstacles , the halls , the paces and the thresholds ! separating us drive me mad . I want you I did not recognize my own eyes in the mirror : there is a thick shadow upon them . I breathe heavily and irregularly, and all day long my thoughts are ri wande ng lustfully about your naked breast . I have forgotten everything . ? In whose power am I It bends me like soft, heated iron . I am deafened , I am blinded by my

. o m n own heat and sparks What do y u do , a , when that happens to you ? Do you simply go and tak e the woman ? Do you violate her ? Think : it is i I can a night now and Mar a is so close by. p proach her room without a sound and I want to hear her cries ! But suppose Magnus bars the ? l road for me I will ki l Magnus .

Nonsense . ? No , tell me , in whose power am I You ought

? - to know that man To day, just before evening, e as I was seeking to escap from myself and Maria , th I wandered about e streets , but it was worse 201 ’ Satan s Diary

: w s aw there every here I men and women , men I and women . As if had never seen them before !

They all appeared naked to me . I stood long at

Monte - Picio and tried to grasp what a sunset was but could not : before me there passed by in end o less procession those men and w men , gazing into ’ — each other s eyes . Tell me what is Woman ? I s aw — —i e one very beautiful n an automobile . Th sunset threw a rosy glow upon her pale face and in her ears there glistened two diamond sparks . She gaz ed upon the sunset and th e sunset gazed

: on her, but I could not endure it sorrow and love ri he a . e g pped my he rt , as if I were dying Ther hi e l o a . nd her wer trees , green , a m st bl ck Mari a ! Maria !

A r 1 9 e Ca . p il , Isl of pri

Perfect calm reigned upon the sea . From a i e h gh precipice I gazed long upon a littl schooner, Its motionless in the blue expanse . white sails were rigidly still and it seemed as happy as on

that memorable day. And , again , great calm de n scended upon me , while the holy ame of e resounded purely and peacefully, lik the Sabbath bells on the distant shore

There I lay upon the grass , my face t

the sky . The good earth warmed my back , w my eyes were pierced ith warm light, as if 202

e his e a a Toppi bow d h d and mumbled a pr yer, while I removed my hat and thought hi i t l fil How gh above th s ear h y vessel , led nl s with moo it twilight and mysteriou charms , you M ri . a a l stand Thus does stand above my sou . Enough ! Here again the extraordinary begins a e and I must p ause . We sh ll soon drink s om h fe champagne and then we shall go to t e ca . I understand they expect some mandolin players o from Naples there t day . Toppi would rather be shot th an follow me : his conscie nce troubles him B u a . to this day . t it is good th t I will be alone

ril 23— Ap Rome ,

Palazzo Orsini . i h i t. a d N g My pal ce s dea and silent , as if n it we re o e of the ruins of ancient Rome . Beyond the large window lies the garden : it i ent and white with th e rays of the th e vaporous pole of the fountain res embles headles s vision in a silver veil . Its splash scarcely heard through th e thick window- pane as if it were th e sleepy mumbling of th e n guard . Y hi i ll ti l . es s a , t s beau fu and how do y

- i i e . put t? t breathes with lov Of course, would be good to walk beside Maria over th e 204 ’ Satan s Diary san d of the garden path and to trample upon her di i Shadow. But I am sturbed and my d squiet is i e w d r than love . In my attempts to walk lightly n th e ll I wander about the room, lea against wa , a d recline in silence in the corners , n all the time hi i a I seem to hear somet ng. Someth ng far aw y, n hi all a thousa d kilometers from here . Or is t s — lodged in my memory that which I strain my ear to catch ? And the thousand kilometers—are they the thousan d years of my life ? Y ou would be astonished if you saw how I was dressed . My fine American costume had suddenly e hi become unb arably heavy, so I put on my bat ng

l o hi nd . . ta l a suit This made me appear t n, wiry I tri ed to test my nimblenes s by crawling about flo oi' l e the , suddenly changing the direction, ik a noiseless bat . But it is not I who am restless . i It is my muscles that are filled with th s unrest , and I know not what they want . Then I began i s a n . to feel cold . I dressed and t dow to wr te I drank some wine and drew down the curtains to th e shut white garden from my eyes . Then I e mi fix xa ned and ed my Browning. I intend to take it with me to - morrow for a friendly chat with

Y ou s ee o lla bo r , Thomas Magnus has some c a to rs . That is what he calls thos e gentlemen un known to me who respe ctfully get out of my way 205 ’ Satan s Diary

we e when meet, but n ver greet me , as if we were

meeting in the street and not in my house . There

were two of them when I went to C apri . Now s ix they are , according to what Toppi tells me ,

and they live here . Toppi doe s not like them .

do . a ace Neither I They seem to h ve no f s . I

could not s e e them . I happened to think of that

just now when I tried to recall them . “ ” a These are my ssistants , Magnus told me

to- day without trying in the least to conceal his e ridicul . “ s a Well, I must y, Magnus , they have had bad ” training . They never greet me when we meet . “ a W onder o o d ! On the contr ry, dear g They are

- nn ri very well mannered . They simply ca ot b ng themselves to greet you without a proper intro

duction . They are extremely correct people . ’ - However, you will learn all to morrow. Don t W onder o od ! u st‘ one . J frown Be patient, g more night ! “ ’ How is Signorina Maria s health ? ” - m o rr h l To ow s e wi l be well . He placed his a e hand upon my shoulder and brought his d rk, vil , “ braz en e yes cl o ser to my face : The passion of ? ” love , eh I shook o fi his hand and shouted Signor Magnus ! I ”— You ? he frowned at me and calmly turned 206

’ Satan s Diary tain and Maria and my very thoughts on the man — r eal mi Magnus , but the my nd can neither nu d ravel nor understan . I assiduously examine my an d memory it is Silent, like a closed book, and I t e con have no power to open his enchanted volum , cealin m g the whole past of y being. Straining my a eyesight , I gaze into the bright and dist nt depth from which I came upon this pastebo ard earth but I see nothing in the p ainful ebb and flow of the i . o boundless fog There , beh nd the fog, is my c un —i t try, but it seems seems I have quite forgotten the road . ’ I have again returned to W ondergo od s b ad habit of getting drunk alone and I am slightly h . t e . drunk now. No matter It is last time I have just seen something after which I wish to s e e lo nothing else . I felt like taking a ok at the white garden an d to imagine how it would feel to walk beside Maria over the path of blue s and . I turned o ff the light in the ro om and opened wide the drap ; An me e eries . d the white garden arose before , lik — — a dream and think of it ! ove r the p ath of blue , — s an d there walked a man and a woman and th e ! e woman was Maria Th y walked quietly, tram pling upon their own shadows , and the man em in braced her . The little counting machine my the and breast beat madly, fell to floor broke , all th e —it was when , fin y, I recognized man Mag 208 ’ Satan s Diary

h Ma s t e . nus , only Magnu , dear Magnus , father y he be cursed with his fatherly embraces ! M aria i Ah , how my love for surged up aga n within me ! I fell on my knees before the window e and stretched out my hands to her . To b al sure , I had ready seen something of that kind in ’ it s the theater, but all the same to me : I stretched out my hands—was I not al one and drunk ? Why should I not do what I want to do ? Madonna ! ‘ Then I suddenly drew down the curtain ! i o Qu etly, like a web , like a handful of m onlight, I will take this vision and weave it into night

209 25 1 91 4 — May , . Italy. AD i I at my d sposal , not the pitiful word ul but a strong orchestra , I wo d compel all i the brass trumpets to roar . I would ra se their blazing mouths to the sky and would compel blaz en them to rave incessantly in a , screeching voice which would make one ’ s hair stand on end and scatter the clouds in terror . I do not want the a lying violins . H teful to me is the gentle murmur of false strings beneath the fingers of liars and ! ! scoundrels . Breath Breath My gullet is like r — a a brass ho n . My breath hurricane , driving forward into every narrow cleft . And all of me ri c ngs , ki ks and grates like a heap of iron in the a f ce of the wind . Oh , it is not always the mighty, wrathf ul roar of brass tru mpets . Frequently, i very frequently it s the pitiful wail of burned , ru ik sty iron , crawling along lonely, l e the winter, th s ri e whistle of bent twig , which d ves thought cold an d fills the heart with th e ru st of gloom and r hi homelessness . Eve yt ng that fire can touch has a burned up within me . W s it I who wanted to 21 0

’ Satan s Diary — billionaire Henry W ondergoo d do you remember a Am n hi s th t genial erica , with cigar and patent ? ! gold teeth Alas He is no longer with us . He died suddenl y and you will do well if you order a requiem mass for him : his Illinois 8 0 1 1 1 is in need of your prayers . e to l Let us return, howev r, his ast hours . I shall try to b e exact in My rec ollections . and give you not only the emotions but als o th e words of —it e o that evening was ev ning, when the mo n was shining brightly . Perhaps I shall not give you th il l quite e words spoken but, at any rate , they w be the words I he ard and stored away in my i e memory . If you were ever wh pp d, worthy f i w comrade , then you know how di ficult t as for t h A e you to c ount all h e blows of t e whip . chang ! a ? n of gravity You underst nd Oh, you u der hi s stan d everyt ng. And so let u receive the last W onder oo d breath of Henry g , blown up by the M ari culprit Thomas Magnus and buried by a. I remember : I awoke on the morning after that

t rm e . s o y ev ning, calm and even gay Apparently ff it was the e ect of the sun , shining into that same , broad window through which , at night, there streamed that unwelcome and too highly signifi n : th e cant moo light . You understand now moon sun ? and now the Oh, you understand every I a e thing. t is prob bly for the v ry same rea 21 2 s on I acquir ed my touching faith in the inte grity of Magnus and awaited toward evening that cloud h was less bliss . T is expectation all the greater because his collabo rators you remember his — collaborators ? had begun to greet and bow to i — . s ? e a me What a greeting ah, how much it m ns to the faith of man ! s ll You know my good manner and, therefore , wi believe me when I s ay that I was cold and re strained like a gentleman who has jus t received a legacy. But if you had put your ear to my belly ul in you wo d have heard violins play g within . e hi Som t ng about love , you understand . Oh, you

. vio understand everything And thus , with these lins did I co me to Magnu s in the evening when i a was the moon was sh ning brightly. M gnus i e alone . We were long silent and th s indicat d it me ‘Fi that an interesting conversation awa ed .

’ How is the Signorina s health ? But he interrupt ed me “ f ul t lk W onde We are facing a very di fic t a , r ” go od ? Does that disturb you ? “ l ” al . Oh, no , not at

n ? l . Do you want wi e We l, never mind I shall k n l . dri a litt e but you need not Yes, Wonder ” go od ? He laughe d as he poured out the wine and here 21 3 ’ Satan s Diary

I n oticed with astonishment that h e himself was ’ v er t : y exci ed his large , white , hangman s hands k were quit e noticeably trembling . I do not now exactly just when my violins ceased—I think it was at that very moment . Magnus gulped down — two glasses of wine h e had intended to take only

—an d : a little , sitting down , continued “ der o d 0 W on o . N , you ought not to drink , g I s ens es di m t need all your , un m ed by any hing ’ ’ you didn t drink anything to - day ? No ? That s

s ns es . good . Your e must be clear and sober One must not take anesthetics in such cases as H As vivisection ?

He shook hi s head seriously in affirmation. “ Y Y e s o . o u , vivisecti n have caught my idea marvelously . Yes , in cases of vivisection of the a in soul . For inst nce , when a loving mother is formed o f the death of her son or a rich man th e that h e has become penniless . But senses , n what can we do with the senses , we ca not hold

! Y ou ; them in leash all our life understand , Won th e de rgo o d ? In long run , I am not in the least s o cruel a man as I occasionally seem even to my self and the p ain of others frequently arouses in

. a me an unpleasant , responsive trembling Th t is ’ . not good . A surgeon s hand must be firm 21 4

’ Satan s Diary

I moved my cigar to the other corner of my mouth and as ked “ a And you are re dy, of course , to give me a l ? he ping hand You are a contemptible scoundrel , ” Thomas Magnus . “ ’ ou ll — If that s what y ca me yes . Something ” on that order . “ And a liar !

. W onder oo Perhaps In general, dear g d, it is very necessary for you to change your outlook i Y ou on l fe and man . are too much of an ” idealist . “ ” — —“ And you I ros e from my chair for you it is necessar y to change your fell ow convers ation

- alist . Permit me to bid you good by and to send c a poli e commissary in my place .

Magnus laughed . W onder ood ! e Nonsense , g Ev rything has been i w hi . done t n the law You , yourself, have handed r n over everything to me . This will su pris e o one i w th your love for humanity. Of course , you i ? can procla m yourself insane . You understand — e s th e and then , p rhap , I may get to peniten iar — n t y . But you you will la d in an insane asy

l . d . um You woul d hardly like that, ear friend ll l l ! k . Po ice Well , go on tal ing It wi re ieve the ff ” first e ects of the blow . I think it was really difficult f or me to conceal 21 6 ’ Satan s Diary t my excitement. I hurled my cigar angrily in o hi a l as the fireplace , w le my eye c refu ly me ured n d both the window a Magnus no , this car l cass was too big to play ba l with . At that moment the loss of my wealth had n ot yet fully impressed itself upon my mind and it was that which maddened me as much as the brazen tone of Magnus and the patronizing man ner of the old scoundrel . In addition , I dimly h sensed somet ing portentous of evil and sorrow, like a threat : as if some real danger were lurking i not in front of me but beh nd my back . “ ” h all u t What is t is abo t ? I shou ed, stamping

” hi all ? ke What is t s about replied Magnus , li “ e an echo Yes , I r ally cannot understand why W onder o od you are so excited, g . You have so fre ’ quently o fl ered me this money and even forced it is upon me and now, when the money in my hands , ” ll i ! s you want to ca the pol ce Of course , Magnu —“ smiled there is a slight distinction here : in placing your money s o magnanimously at my dis os al p , you still remained its master and the mas th e ter of e situation, whil now you un der s r tand, old friend : now I can simply d ive you out of this house ! ” ifi n l H I looked at Magnus sign ca t y. e replied 21 7 ’ Satan s Diary with no less a srgnrficant shrug of th e shoulders and cried angrily

Stop your nonsense . I am stronger than you are . Do not try to be more of a fool than is abs o l tel u y necessitated by the situation . “ You are an unusually brazen scoundrel, Sig nor Magnus “ Again ! H ow these sentimental souls do seek consolation in words ! Take a cigar and listen to

. a a me I h ve long needed money, a gre t deal of money . In my past, which I need not disclose to f i e e i . you , I hav su f red certa n fa lures They irritated me considerably . Fools and sentimental r ? im ris souls , you unde stand My energy was p

on ed an d in . under lock key, like a bird a cage s at i For three years I in th s cursed cage , await ing my chance — And all that in the beautiful Campagna ? th e Yes , in beautiful Campagna and I u e a had already beg n to lose hop , when you p ear d ffi p e . I find it di cult to express myself at this point “ a om unc Be as direct as you can . H ve no c p ” tions . “ You seemed very strange with all this love of la yours for men and your p y, as you finally termed f or it, and, my friend , a long time I had grave doubts as to what you really were : an extrao rdin 21 8

’ Satan s Diary

Magnus raised his hand is consoling gesture “ ! to m e Oh, no You seemed e to be that at th

e . do b ginning I will tell you quite truthfully, as I everything I am telling you now : you are not a W n er o t o d o d. fool a all, g I have grown to know ’ a you more intimately. It doesn t matter th t you have s o n arvely surrendered your billions to me many wise men have be en fooled before by clever scoundrels ! Your misfortune is quite ” n i a other th ng. I had the strength to smile My love for human be ings ?

0 : N , my friend your contempt for human berngs ! Your con temp t and at the same time your n arve faith in them arising from it . You

s o are human beings far below you, you so con vin ced of their fatal powerlessness that you do not fear them at all and are quite ready to pat the ’ rattlesnake s he ad : such a nice little rattlesnake ! e e ! k One should fear peopl , comrad I now

ame i e g , but at t mes you were quit sincere in prattle about man you even pitied him, but , — an elevation or from a sidetrack I know which . Oh, if you could only hate people I w take you along with me with ple asure . But r are an egotist, a ter ible egotist and I am even beginning to shed 220 ’ Satan s Diary ! having robbed you, when I think of that Whence comes this base contempt of yours ? ” “ n I amstill o ly learning to be a man . r ll Well , go on lea ning . But why do you ca your professor a scoundrel : For I am your pro ” o W on er o o ! fes s r, d g d “ To the devil with this prattle . So do not intend to take me along with you ? “ ” No , my friend, I do not . l s . r So . Only my bi lion Ve y well, but what about your plan : to blow up the earth or some hi o f d ? i o i t ng that kin Or did you l e n th s point, too ? I cannot believe that you simply intend to ’ open a money changer s bureau or become some ragged king ! ” Magnus looked at me gloomily There was e ven a gle am of sympathy in his eyes as he replied slowly ‘ ’ 0 N , on that point I did not lie . But you won t

do for me . You would always be hanging on to

. : li oun my coat tails Just now you shouted ar, s c i ’ drel, th ef . It s strange , but you are yet only learning to be a man and you have already im bibed o s much pettiness . When I shall raise my h n a d to strike some one , your contempt will be gin ’ : rik to whine don t st e , leave him alone , have pity. nl t ! r ib Oh, if you could o y ha e No , you are a ter le ” ti l n ego st, o d ma , 221 ’ Satan s Diary

I shouted The devil take you with your harping on this egotism ! I am not in the least more stupid than d you , you beast, an I cannot understand what you find s o saintly in hatred ! Magnus frowned “ ’ I ’ First of all : don t shout or ll throw you out . ? are o e Do you hear Yes , perhaps you no m r ’ stupid than I am, but man s business is not your e busin ss . Do you realize that, you beast ? In w blo ing up things , I only intend to do business ’ and you want to be the ru ler of another s plant . Let them steal and break down the machinery and — you you will be concerned only about yo ur salary and the respect due you ? And I—I won ’ t stand ! i —h e t that All th s , swept the room wi h a broad “ — n in e gesture is my pla t, m , do you hear, and it i n in s I who will be robbe d . I will be robbed a d

e r ob . a jured . And I hat those who me Wh t th e would you have done, in long run , with your billions if I had not taken them from you ? Built , — conservatories and raised heirs for the perpe tua tion of your kind ? Private yachts and diamond s for your wife ? And I give me all th e gold on earth and I will throw it all int o th e flames of all c e ! my hatred . And be ause I hav been insulted ‘ W “ ‘ n you s e e a hunchback you throw him a lire . to his m ? So that he may continue bear hu p , yes 222

’ Satan s Diary

merely loading the cannons . The wise man need th e only apply the fire to fuse , you understan d ? Could y ou behold calmly the sight of a blis ul an d sheep hungry snake lying together, separated only by a thin partition ? I could not ! I would i i drill just a little open ng, a little open ng . the rest they would do themselves . Do you know that from the u nion of truth and falsehood come s ? a an explosion I want to unite . I sh ll do nothing myself : I shall only comple te what they have b e un ? g . Do you hear how merrily they sing I will ! ! make them dance , too Come with me , comrade — You sought some sort of a play let me give you an extraordinary spectacle ! We shall bring the whole earth into action an d millions of marion e tte s will begin to caper obediently at our com mand : you know not yet how talented and oblig i wi ing they are . It w ll be a splendid play and ll give you much pleasure and amusement . A large log fell apart and split into man y Spark s n d a . hot cinders The , flame subsided , growing

a th e . morose and red . A silent heat eman ted from

- dimmed, smoke smeared hearth . It burned my face and suddenly there arose before me my pup ’ pets show . The heat and fire had conjured up a mirage . I seemed to hear the crash of drums and a th e the g y ring of cymbals , while merry clown turned on his head at the sight of the broken 224 ’ Satan s Diary

a skulls of the dolls . The broken he ds continued th e to pile up . Then I saw scrap heap , with two motionless little legs protruding from the heap of

s . rubbish . They wore rose lippers And the

: - w - An drums continued beating tw p t p tump . d I said pensively “ I think it will hurt them . And behind my back rang out the contemptuous and in difierent reply “ ” Quite possibly.

- - Tump tump tump . W onder o od It is all the same to you , g , but I ’ cannot ! Can t you see : I cannot permit eve ry i l are m serable biped to ca l himself a man . There

al . too many of them, ready They multiply like

u . rabbits , nder the stimulus of physicians and laws n Death, deceived, cannot ha dle them all . It is confus ed and seems to have lost its dignity and moral authority . It is wasting its time in dancing halls . I hate them . It has become repulsive to o me to walk upon this earth, fallen int the power

of a strange , strange species . We must suspend the law, at least temporarily, and let de ath have fli . to its ng However, they themselves will see

this . No , not I, but they, will do it . Think not t r —I that I am par icularly c uel , no am only logi

. am th e cal I only conclusion , the symbol of l l th equality, the sum tota , the ine beneath e 225 ’ Satan s Diary

s M . a column of figure You may call it Ergo , g ! ‘ ’ o ! s a : two nd n nus , Erg They y a two a d I reply ‘ ’ E four . xactly four . Imagine that the world has suddenly grown cold and immovable for a moment and you behold some s uch picture : here — is a free an d careless he ad and above it a su s e e a pend d axe . H re is a m s s of powder and here h as a spark about to fall upon it . But it stopped a s et and does not fall . Here i s a he vy structure ,

. e upon a single , undermined foundation But v e rything has grown ri gi d and the foundation r a mi holds . He e is a bre st and here a hand ai ng a e l a bullet at it . H ve I prepar d al this ? I th e merely touch lever and press it down . The axe falls upon thelaughing he ad and crushe s it . — The spark falls into the p owder all is ofi The u er building crashes to the ground . The b llet pi ces s I —I a e o the ready brea t . And h v merely t uched

! i : be the lever, I, Magnus Ergo Th nk would I able to kill had I at my disposal only violins or ” othe r musical instruments ?

Only violins ! Magnus replied with laughter : his voice was hoarse and heavy “ u ! And But they have other instr ments , too I Se e will use these instruments . how simple and ” interesting all this is ? 226

’ Satan s Di ary the n ow extingui shed fire and looked upon the explosive head of my repulsive friend . Some hi n arve wr t ng , like two little inkles , almost like hi those of a c ld , lay upon his stony brow. I burst into laughter and shouted : Thomas Magnus ! Thomas Ergo ! Do you be ” lieve ? a Without raising his head, as if he had not he rd his my laughter, he lifted eyes and replied pen sively “ We must try.

B ut : — I continued to laugh deep , wild appar — ently human laughing malice began to ri se with in me “ Thoma s Magnus ! Magnus Rabbit ! Do you believe ? ” He thumped the table with his fist and roared in a wild transport “ ! Be quiet I tell you : we must try . How do I know ? I have never yet been on Mars nor seen

- ! i . c th s earth inside out Be silent, a cursed egotist fi ir a a s . You know nothing of our Ah , if only you could hate ! “ I hate already . Magnus suddenly laughed and grew strangely l ca m . He s at down and scrutinizing me from all a li po ssible angles , s if he did not be eve me , he burst out 228 ’ Satan s Diary You ? Hate ? Whom ?

You . He looked me over as carefully again and shook his head in doubt I u W onde r o o d ? s that tr e , g

If they are rabbits , you are the most repulsive c a mi of them all , be ause you are xture of rabbit ! and Satan . You are a coward The fact a is that you are a crook, thief, a liar, a murderer r ! not important . But you are a cowa d That is

important . I expected something more of you . I hoped your mind would lift you above the gre at e s t i a crime , but you lift cr me itself into some b se h as philant ropy . You are as much of a lackey ifi n n d the others . The only d e re ce b etween you a them is that you have a perverted ide a of ” service !

Magnus sighed . “ ’ No , that s not it . You understand nothing, W onder o o g d. “ And what you lack is daring, my friend . If you are Magnus Ergo what audacity : Mag — ’ nus Ergo then why don t you go th e limit ? to o ul ! Then , I, , wo d follow you perhaps “ Will you really come ? And why should I not come ? Let me be Con — t . tempt, and you Hatred . We can go ogether

Do not fear lest I hang on to your coat tails . You 229 ’ Satan s Diary

e a to have r ve led much me , my dear putridity, and I shall not seize your hand even though you rais e ” it against yours elf . “ Will you betray me ?

And you will kill me . Is that not enough ? But Magnus shook his head doubtfully and said wi You ll betray me . I am a living human being, while you smell like a corpse . I do not t m s el want to have contemp for y f. If I do , I ’ perish . Don t you dare to look at me ! Look upon the others ! ”

I laughed . r Ve y well . I shall not look at you . I will a ou look at the rest . I will make it e sier for y with ” my contempt . h e Magnus fell into prolonged thought . Then looked again at me piercingly and quietly asked “ An d Maria ? ! Oh, cursed wretch Again he hurled my heart ! e up on the floor I looked at him wildly, lik one aroused at night by fire . And three big waves v swept my breast . With the first wa e rose the s silent violin ah , how they wailed , just as if the musician played not upon strings but upon my veins ! Then in a huge wave with foamy surf e mo there rolled by all the images , thoughts and

d m : tions of my recent , belove hu an state think of it : everything was there ! Even the liz z ard that 230

’ ‘Satan s Diary

. s ee Sit down You will her presently . But I continued to weave my nonsense—what in the devil had happened to my head ! I prattled on for a considerable period and now the whole thing seems so ridiculous : Once or twice I pressed nl n the heavy, motio ess ha d of Thomas Magnus : apparently he must have looked like my father

. al re at that moment Finally, I subsided , parti ly ’ s o e gained my sense but, in bedienc to Magnus i command , remained in my cha r and prepared o t liste n . “ r Can you listen now ? You a e quite excited, ” : ! old man . Remember the senses , the Senses Y s e n ow . ev , I can go on I remember hin l er t . C . a l y g ontinue , old friend I am atten ” tion . Y es was e , I recollected everything but it quit immaterial to me just what Magnus said or what a he might say : I was awaiting Maria . Th t is how strong my love was ! Turning aside for some reason and beating time with his fingers on the table , Magnus said slowly and rather reluctantly “ o d r o i be n e o d. Listen , W g In real ty, it would much more convenient for me to throw you out

th . into e street, you and your idiotic Toppi You wanted to experience all human life and I would have viewed with pleasure any efforts on your Y l part to e arn your own bre ad . ou are apparent y 232 ’ Satan s Diary no longer used to this ? It would also have been very interesting to know what would become of your grandiose contempt when But I am not angry . Strange to say, I even nurse a feeling l of thankfulness for your bil ions . And I e am rather hopeful . Yes , I still have a little hop that some day you may really grow to be a man . hi n And w le this may prove a impediment to me , I — am ready to take you with me , but only after a i certa n test . Are you still anxious to have Maria ? “ Yes .

Very well . Magnus rose with effort and moved toward th e B door . ut he halted for a moment and turned — towar d me and surprising as it was on th e part

hi —h e of t s scoundrel kissed my brow. “

w i e te . Sit do n, old man . I will call her mm dia ly

n - The serva ts are all out to day . He uttered the last sentence as he knocked e hi s aides f ebly at the door . The head of one of appeared for a moment and immediately with drew . With apparently the same e fiort Magnus returned to his place and said with a sigh : “ ” She will be here at once .

x We were silent . I fi ed my eyes upon the tall M . ri door and it opened wide a a entered . With 233 ’ Satan s Diary

a quick step I moved to greet her bowed Magnus shouted “ ’ Don t kiss that han d !

Ma 2 y 7 .

I could not continue these notes yesterday . Do not laugh ! This mere combination of words do not kiss that hand - seemed to me the most terrible utterance the human tongue was capable e of . It acted upon me like a magic curse . Wh n I recall those words now they in te rrup t every do e a thing I and befog my whol being, tr ns o e porting me into a new state . If I happen t b

Speaking I grow silent , as if suddenly stricken d umb . If I happen to be walking, I halt . If

ru n . standing, I If I happen to be asleep , no mat n ter how deep my slumber, I awake a d cannot fall

ai . e e asleep ag n V ry simple , extremely Simpl words : Do not kiss that hand ! And now listen to what happened further M ’ And s o : I bowed over aria s han d . But so ’ was cr s o strange and sudden Magnus y, great as w the command in his hoarse voice , that it was impossible to disobey . It was as if he had stopped a blind man on the e dge of a precipice ! B u t I failed to grasp his meaning and raised my head ’ mi in perplexity, still holding Maria s hand in ne , an d l was hi h eav ooked at Magnus . He breat ng 234

’ Satan s Diary my mistress and sh e was that as recently as 7 7

Now I understand that Magnus was m in his own way and was intentionall me slowly into darkness . But at that e an d s lowl realiz this y stifling, i ally dy ng, I lost consciousness ’ Magnus last words the light fled from i mpenetrable night enveloped my being, I ped out my revolver and fired at Magnus s times in succession . I do not know how shots I fired . I remember only a series of lau in g, flickering flames and the movements of a n hand , pushing the weapon forw rd . I ca not member at all how and when his aides an d disarmed me; When I regained my s this was the picture I saw : the aides were wa I s sitting deep in my chair before the .

fireplace , my hair was wet, while above my eyebrow there was a ban dage soaked in bl

My collar was gone and my shirt was torn , o ff left sleeve was almost entirely torn , so n ri had to keep jerking it up consta tly . Ma a s on the same spot, in the same pose , as if she not moved at all during th e struggle . I was s e e at and prised to Toppi, who s in a corner gaz h a l at n l . At t e ck me stra ge y t b e , with his ba 236 ’ Satans Diary

H ut . e was o e me, stood Magnus pouring som wine for himself . l M a Wh en I heaved a particular y deep sigh , g nus turned quickly and said in a strangely famil iar tone “ W onder o od? Do you want some wine , g You may have a glass now . Here , drink . You see you failed to hit me . I do not know whether to be glad or not, but I am alive . To your health, old

I touched my brow with my finger and mumbled

Blo od . ’ A mere trifle , just a little scratch . It won t ’ ” matter. Don t touch it . “ It smells . ? ’ t to . With powder Yes , hat ll soon p as s , o s e him ? Toppi is here . Do you e He asked permis ’ sion to stay here . You won t object if your s ec retary remains while we continue our conversa ? ” tion He is extremely devoted to you .

I looked at Toppi and smiled . Toppi made a grimace and sighed gently “ W on der o o d ! Mr . g It is I, your Toppi . An d he burst into tears . This old devil , still i emitting the odor of fur, th s old clown in black, wi this sexton th hanging nose , this seducer of little girls—burst into tears ! But still worse was it ink when, bl ing my eyes , I, too, began to weep, 237 ’ Satan s Diary

“ ” th e t ! t I, wise , immor al , almighty Thus we bo h wept, two deceived devils who happened to drop hi — in upon t s earth, and human beings I am happy to give them their due - looked on with m nd deep sy pathy for our tears . Weeping a laughing at the same time , I asked “ ’ ffi ? It s di cult to be a man , Toppi An d Toppi, sobbing, replied obediently “ ” f W on de r o d c . o . Very di fi ult , Mr g But here I happened to look at Marra and my m sentimental tears im ediately dried . In general , that evening is memorable for the sudden and s ludicrous transformations of my mood . You ? probably know them, old man Now I wept and

. e beat the lyre , like a weeping post, now I becam permeated with a stony calm and a sense of un conquerable power, or I began to chatter non sense , like a parrot scared to death by a dog, and kept up my chatter , louder, sillier and more and o ff more unbearable , until a new mood bore me into a deep and inexpressible sadness . Magnus caught my look at Maria and smiled involuntarily. I adjusted the collar of my torn shirt and said

I do not know whether to be glad or sorry that i r . l I failed to kill you , old f end I am quite ca m n now, however, a d would like you to tell me every thing about that woman . But as you are a 238

’ Satan s Diary ures are fill ed with placid harmony did you ’ notice how clear Maria s gaz e is ? Do you hear me ? ” “ r t Yes , ce ainly.

Would you like win e or an orange ? Take it .

There it is on the table . Incidentally, observe her graceful walk : sh e seems to be always stepping l ightly as if on flowers or clouds . What extra ordinary be auty and litheness ! As an old lover I i of hers , may also add the follow ng detail which

: sh e you have not learned yet herself, her body,

has the fragrance of some flowe rs . Now as to her

tu . Spiri al qualities , as the psychologists put it If I di were to speak of them in or nary language , I sh s — a would s ay e was as stupid a a goose , quite

l . hopeless fool . But she is cunning . And a iar Very avaricious as regards money but sh e likes it r only in gold . Eve ything she told you she learned

e f . from me , memorizing the mor di ficult lines

and I had quite a task in teaching her . But I ll th e feared a time that , despite your love , you would be struck by her apparent lack of brains and that is why I kept her from you the last few ” days . Toppi sobbed ” ! a ! Oh, God Madonn ” i ? —Ma s n ou . Does thi asto sh y , Mr Toppi g “ t his . sa ou nus asked, urning head I dare y y are 24 0 ’ Satan s Diary

l e o W onder ood not a on . Do y u remember, g , what ’ at l I told you about Maria s f a resemblance , which drove one young man to suicide . I did not lie to you al together : the youth actually did kill himself when he realized who Mari a really was . He was pure of soul . He loved as you do and as you he could not bear—how do you put it —the wreck of his ideal . Magnus laughed “ ? Do you remember Giovanni , Maria ” Slightly . ” W onder o o d? a D o you hear, g asked M gnus , “ i hi sh laughing . That s exactly the tone in w ch e would have spoken of me a week hence if you

- il me . . had k led to day Have another orange , Maria But if I were to s peak of Maria in extraordi n —sh e nary la guage is not at all stupid . She simply doesn ’ t happen to have what is called a soul . I have frequently tried to look deep into her heart and thoughts and I have always ended in vertigo , as if I had been hurled to the edge of an i : th n . Y ou abyss there was n o g there Emptiness . W on der o o d . have probably observed, g , or you, Mr

Toppi , that ice is not as cold as the brow of a dead man ? An d no matter what emptiness famil i iar to you you may imag ne , my friends, it cannot be compared with that absolute vacuum which

l li - i forms the kernel of my beautifu , ght g ving star . 24 1 ’ Satan s Diary — Star of the Seas that was what you once called ” W on de r o o d her, g , was it not ? Magnus laughed again and gulped down a glass nk of wine . He dra a great deal that evening . “ Will you have some wine , Mr . Toppi ? No ? ’ Well, suit yourself . I ll take some . So that is W n er o o d . o d why, Mr g , I did not want you to kiss a ’ the h nd of that creature . D on t turn your eyes

away, old friend . Imagine you are in a museum and look straight at her, bravely. Did you wish s a i ? to y someth ng, Toppi “ Yes , Signor Magnus . Pardon me , Mr . Won der o o d e mi g , but I would lik to ask your per ssion l to leave . As a gentleman , a though not much of that, I cannot remain at Magnus narrowed his eyes derisively “ ” At such a sce ne ? n Yes , at such a scene , whe one gentleman , with e th silent approval of another gentleman , insults ” tha t a woman like , exclaimed Toppi, extremely

t . as irri ated , and rose Magnus , just ironically, turned to me : ‘ sa W on der o od? we And what do you y, g Shall hi l ? ” release t s little , extremely ittle , gentleman “ ” Stay, Toppi .

Toppi sat down obediently.

From the moment Magnus resumed , I, for the

l at a. first time, regained my breath and ooked Mari 24 2

“ ’ Satan s Diary

Magnu s broke into loud laughter and struck th e table with is glass “ W onder o od? Do your hear, g She covets your if good opinion . And I should command her to

undress at once in your presence . “ ” ! ! - n Oh , my God My God sobbed Toppi a d covered his face with his hands . I glanced quickly ’ — into Magnus eyes and remained rigid in the hi terrible enchantment of s gaz e . His face was l hi hi aug ng . T s pale mask of his was still lined with traces of faint laughter but th e eye s were dim and ru e n e insc table . Dir cted upo me , th y stared o fi s omewhere into the distance and were horrible in their expression of dark and emp ty madness : only the empty orbits of a skull coul d

gaze s o threateningly and in such wrath . An d again darkness filled my head and when I regained my senses Magnus had already turned

and calmly sipped his wine . Without changing his t position, he raised his glass to the ligh ,

smelled the wine , sipped some more of it and said as calmly as before “ o W onder o o d . ou And s , g , my friend Now y know about all there is to know of Maria or the

ask : l Madonna , as you called her, and I you wil

you take her or not ? I give her away . Take her.

s a sh e l - If you y yes , wil be in your bedroom to day l l t ou ll and 3 I swear by eterna sa va ion, y wi 24 4 ’ Satan s Diary

ll u ni . do o pass a very pleasant ght We , what y ” s ay ?

to - ? Yesterday, you , and day, I — ” - I . Yesterday , to day, you He smiled

. W onde r o o d What kind of man are you , g , to ' ’ fl aren Speak of such tri es . Or t you used to hav ? ing some one else warm your bed Take her. ” She is a fine girl . “ — r Ma nus z me or Whom are you to turing, g

Magnus looked at me ironically “ ! ! What a wise boy Of course , myself You are ri nder d a r . o o o ve y clever Ame can, Mr W g , and I wonder why your career has bee n s o mediocre .

G o . . to bed, dear children Good night What are onder o fin d you looking at, W g od : do you the hour ? If s o th e too early , take her out for a walk in garden . When you see Maria beneath the moon 3000 M a nu s e s to a night, g will be unable prove th t this heavenly maiden is the s ame creature who I flared up u l You are a disg sting scoundrel and iar, Thomas Magnus ! If she has received her train lu anaria ing in a p , then you , my worthy signor, must have received your higher education in the r h penitentia y. W ence comes that aroma which permeate s so thoroughly your gentlemanly jokes 24 5 ’ Satan s D iary

and l witticisms . The sight of your p a e face is

beginning to nauseate me . After enticing a woman

in the fashion of a petty, common hero . his Magnus struck the table with fist . His flame bloodshot eyes were a . “ ! an Silence You are inconceivable ass , Won ’ der o o d ! g Don t you understand that I myself, ? Wh o like you , was deceived by her , meeting M adonn a c ? ! , can es ape deception Oh devil What sufierin s are the g of your little , shallow American soul in comparison with the pangs of mine ? Oh ! devil Witticism , jests , gentlemen and ladies , ’ ! s e e asses and tigers , god s and devils Can t you — an this is not a woman , this is eagle who daily plucks my liver ! My suff ering begins in the morn

ing . Each morning, oblivious to what passed the

or . day before , I see Madonna bef e me and believe I think : what happened to me yesterday ? Ap ar entl mi p y, I must be staken or did I miss any ? I i thing t is impossible that this clear gaze , th s k divine wal , this pure countenance of Madonna I should belong to a prostitute . t is your soul that

: . is vile , Thomas Magnus she is as pure as a host An d there were occasions when , on my knees , I actually begged forgiveness of this creature ! Can you imagine it : on my knees ! Then it was that I

W onder o o d. was re ally a scoundrel , g I idealized he r t and e l s her, endowed with my houghts f e ing 24 6

’ Satan s Diary

a But M gnus had already calmed himself . Sub duing his excitement and the drunkenness which ‘ im erce tibl come had p p y upon him, he returned to hi s place without haste and ordered politely “ wi a . I ll answer you in moment , Mr Wonder good . Please withdraw to your room Maria . I

s a W on der o o d. have something to y to Mr . g And

I would ask you , too , my honorable Mr . Toppi , to depart . You may join my friends in the salon W o n r o o a de d . If Mr . g will so comm nd r i replied Toppi, d yly, without r sing. o I nodded and , without l oking at Magnus , my

i . secretary obed ently made his exit Maria, too , u left the room . To tell the tr th, I again felt like clinging to his vest and weeping in the first fe w

e - a- e a : ll moments of my t te t te with M gnus after a , this thief was my friend ! But I satisfied myself wi with merely swallo ng my tears . Then followed a moment of brief desperation at the dep arture of

. An re Maria d slowly, as if from the realm of an d mote recollection , blind and wild anger the need of beating and destroying began to fill my was heart . Let me add , too , that I extremely pro voke d by my torn sleeve that kept slipping con s tantly : it was ne cessary for me to b e stern and austere and this made me seem ridiculous rifle s ul ah , on what t does the res t of the greatest e vents depend on this e arth ! I lighted a cigar and 248 ’ “ Satan 3 Diary with studied grufin e s s hurled into th e calm and hateful fac e of Magnus “ ! a Now, you Enough of comedy and ch rlatan ism . Tell me what you want . So you want me to surrender to that bird of prey of yours ? ” ml Magnus replied cal y, although his eyes were burning with anger : “ Yes . That is the trial I wanted to subject you W onde r o o d be to, g . I fear that I have succum d slightly to the emotion of useless and vain revenge and spoke more heatedly than was necess ary in ’ hi W onder o o d Maria s presence . The t ng is , g , that all that I have s o picturesquely described to i all you, all th s passion and despair and these su fie rings of Prometheus really belong to the p ast . I now look upon Maria without pain and w m u even ith a certain a ount of pleas re , as upon a beautiful an d useful little beast useful for d ? omestic considerations . You understand What i ? is after all, is the l ver of Prometheus It all ! t nonsense In reali y, I should be thankful to

Maria . She gnawed out with her little teeth my aith an d a silly f gave me that cle r, firm and real istic outlook upon life which pe rmits of no decep tions and sentimentalisms . You , too , ought W on der o o d ou to experience and grasp it, g , if y l would fol ow Magnus Ergo .

i m . I remained silent, lazily chewng y cigar 24 9 ’ Satan s Diary

Magnus lowered his eyes and continued still more calmly and dryly : “ Desert pilgrims , to accustom themselves to ffi death, used to sleep in co ns : let Maria be your ffi an d l co n when you feel ike going to church , kiss in o a g a w man and stretching your h nd to a friend, ath er m M a just look at Maria and her f , Tho as g W on de r oo d nus . Take her, g , and you will soon l ’ convince yourse f of the value of my gift . I don t need her any longer . And when your humiliated soul shall become inflamed with truly in ex tin uish able wi ak g , human hatred and not th we con

tempt , come to me and I shall welcome you into n s r the ra k of my yeomanry, which will ve y ? soon . Are you hesitating Well , then go ,

catch other lies , but be careful to avoid scoundrels ! ” and Madonnas , my gentleman from Illinois He broke into loud laughter and swallowed a l glass of wine at one gulp . His swollen ca m evap f e orated . Little lam s of intoxication , now merry, al now ludicrous , like the lights of a carniv , now dim triumphant, now , like funeral torches at a

o . grave , again sprang forth in his bloodsh t eyes ml The scoundrel was drunk but held himself fir y, merely swaying his branches , like an oak before a b e ai d south wind . Rising and facing me , str ghtene l hi his body cynically, as if trying to revea mself in hi s entirety, and well nigh spat these words at me 250

’ Satan s Diary

this earth, you evil conscienceless creature ! The h e s e a a day will come when t of f lsehood, which w constitutes your life , ill part and all your false to o hood, , will give way and disappear . Let there be no foot upon this earth to crush you , hairy W ! orm . Let I, too , am powerless here . But the day will come when you will depart from this M earth . And when you come to e and fall under the shadow of my kingdom . “ ? W onde r o o d h o Your kingdom Hold on , g . W ? ” are you , then An d right at this point there occurred the most shameful event of my entire earthly life . Tell me is it not ridiculously funny when Satan, even in in human form , bends his knee prayer to a prosti tute and is stripped naked by the very first man ? Y e s he meets , this is extremely ridiculous and shameful of Satan , who bears with him the breath s a a of eternity . But what would you y of Sat n when he turned into a powerless and pitiful liar and pasted upon his head with a great flourish the ? paper crown of a theatrical czar I am ashamed , on old man . Give me one of your blows , the kind which you feed your fri ends and hired clowns . Or h as this torn sleeve brought me to this senseless , pititful wrath ? Or was this the last act of my ’ human masquerade , when man s spirit descends to the mire and sweeps th e dust and di r t with its 252 ’ Satan s Diary

t rain hi brea h ? Or has the of Madonna, w ch I

witnessed, dragged Satan, too , into the same abyss ? — But this was - think of it this was what I T answered Magnus . hrusting out my chest, barely

covered with my torn shirt, stealthily pulling up

s o mi l o ff my sleeve , that it ght not s ip entirely, and looking stern ly and angrily directly into the

stupid, and as they seemed to me , frightened eyes trimn han tl of the scoundrel Magnus , I replied p y “ — ” I am Satan ! — Magnus was silent for a moment an d then ll broke out into a the laughter that a drunken, l repu sive , human belly can contain . Of course you , old man , expected that, but I did not . I swear ! by eternal salvation , I did not I shouted some thing but the brazen laughter of this beast w c . a dro ned my voi e Finally, t king advantage of ’ a moment s interval between his thundering peals l n of aughter, I exclaimed quickly a d modestly k like a footnote at the bottom of a page , li e a com mentary of a publisher “ ’ : Don t you understand I am Satan . I have donned the human form ! I have donned the human form ! ” l He heard me with his eyes bu ging, and with t t fresh hunderous roars of laugh er, the outbursts 253 ’ Satan s Diary s k n his h e ha i g entire frame , moved toward the door, flung it open and shouted “ Here ! Come here ! Here is Satan ! In human human garb ! ” An d he disappeared behind the door.

Oh, if I could only have fallen through the floor, disappeared or flown away, like a real devil, on wings , in that endless moment , during which he was gathering the pu blic for an extraordinary An — n . d spectacle now they came all of them, dam them : Maria and all the s ix aides and my miser e n d abl Toppi, and Magnus himself, a completing — X ! the procession His Eminence , Cardinal . The cursed , shaven monkey walked with great dignity an s at d even bowed to me , after which he down, i an d just as dign fied , in an armchair carefully covered his kn ees with his robes . All were won w dering, not kno ing yet what it was all about , and glanced now at me and now at Magnus, who tried hard to look serious . “ ’ ? ” What s the trouble , Signor Magnus asked the Cardin al in a benevolent tone . “ mi wi Per t me to report the follo ng, your Emi ence on de r o o d n : Mr . Henry W g has just informed — S . a a me that he is atan Yes , S tan , and th t he has our merely donned th e human fo rm . And thus assumption that h e is an American from Illinois all r o o a tl f s . Mr. W onde g d is S atan and app ren y 254

’ Satan s Diary

his hands , was cringing in the corner, silent . Amid al gener laughter, and ringing far above it , came th e c ni heavy voi e of Magnus , laden with infi te ridicule “ ! Look at the plucked rooster . That is Satan And again there came an outburst of laugh ter . His Eminence continuously shook, as though

flapping his wings , and choked and whined . The ’ monkey s gullet could hardly p ass the cascades of o fi laughter . I tore that accursed sleeve madly and waving it like a flag, I ventured into a sea of f i w s et. alsehood , th full sails I knew that some where ahead there were rocks against which I might be shattered but the tempest of impotence and anger bore me on like a chip of wood .

I am ashamed to repeat my speech here . Every word of it was trembling and wailing with impo i i no e . v ten y Like a village car, frightening his g hi H ell rant paris oners , I threatened them with and with all the Dantean torture s of literary fame .

Oh , I did know something that I might really have frightened them with but how could I express the extraordin ary which is inexpressible in their lan guage ? And so I prattled on of eternal fire . Of

r . ete nal torture . Of unquenchable thirst Of the u l gnashing of teeth . Of the fr it essness of tears h a ls e ? Ah and pleading. And w t e even of red I , and hot forks I prattled, maddened more more by 256 ’ Satan s Diary the indiff erence and shamelessness (if these shal l low faces, these sma l eyes , these mediocre souls , regarding themselves above punishment . But they remained unmoved and smug, as if in a for tress , beyond the walls of their mediocrity and fatal blindness . And all my words were shattered against their impenetrable skulls ! And think of l it, the only one who was real y frightened was my Toppi ! And yet he alone could kn ow that all my words were lies ! It was s o unbearably ridiculou s

hi r when I met s pleading f ightened eyes , that I abruptly ended my speech , suddenly, at its very i climax . Silently, I waved my torn sleeve , wh ch t served me as a s andard , once or twice , and hurled it into the corner . For a moment it seemed to me

: that the shaven monkey, too , was frightened the blue of his cheeks seemed to stand out sharply upon the pale, square face and the little coals of his eyes were glowing suspiciously beneath his e black, bushy yebrows . But he slowly raised his hand and th e same sacrilegiously- jesting voice broke the general silence “ Vade Petro Satanas ! Or did the Cardinal try to hide behind this jest his tua ? n ac l fright I do not know. I k ow nothing. G o If I could not destroy them, like Sodom and is r hi morrah, it wo th w le speaking of cold shivers 257 ’ Satan s Diary and goos e flesh ? A mere glass of wine can con quer them. An d th Magnus , like e skilled healer of soul s that h e was , said calmly “ Emi Will you have a glass of wine, Your n ence ? “ With pleasure , replied the Cardinal . ” But none for Satan , added Magnus jestingly, pouring out the wine . But he could speak and do anything b e pleased now : W on der go o d was squeezed dry and hung like a rag up on the arm of the chair . A r fter the wine had been d unk, Magnus lit a a hi e e cigarette (he smokes cig rettes ), cast s y over the audience , like a lecturer before a lecture , mo tioned n pleasa tly to Toppi , now grown quite pale , and said the following although he was ob viou sl his y drunk and eyes were bloodshot, his voice was firm and his speech flowed with meas

I s W onde r o od must ay, g , that I listened to you very attentively and your passionate tirade s a t im created upon me , I may y, a great, ar istic pression at certain points you reminded me of the best passages of Brother Geronimo Savan ’ ou e r e arola . Don t y also find the sam striking m ? ! ar e semblance , Your E inence , But alas You ll slightly behind the times . Thos e threats of he 258

’ Satan s Diary

need not be particular through which door it

: enters I beg the indulgence of His Eminence , but no prostitute received a new guest with greater r welcome than does histo y a new hero . I fear, W onde r o o d c t g , that your referen es o hell as well fl a at. as those to history h ve fallen Ah , I fear your hope in the police will prove equally ill founded : I have failed to tell you that His Emi n ence h as re ceived a certain share of those bil lions which you have transferred to me in such a n perfectly legal ma ner, while his connections you understand ? ’ Poor Toppi : all he could do was to keep on ! ai e blinking The d s broke into loud laughter, but a the Cardin l mumbled angrily, casting upon me the burning little coals of his eyes “ He is indeed a brazen fellow. He said he is

Satan . Throw him out , Signor Magnus . This is sacrilege “ ” “ Is that so ? smiled Magnus politely : I did

not know that Satan, too , belonged to the heavenly i cha r . “ ” a th e al S atan is a fallen angel, s id Cardin in

an instructive tone . “ And as such he is in your service ? I under ” his stand, Magnus bowed head politely in accept ance of this truth and turn ed smilingly to me 260 ’ Satan s Diary

W o nder o o d? is Do you hear, g His Eminence irritated by your audacity . nk l I was silent . Magnus wi ed at me s yly and continued with an air of artificial importance “ b e I believe , Your Eminence , that there must some sort of misunderstanding here . I know the

- modesty and well informed mind of Mr . Wonder good and I suppose that b e u tilized the name of

Satan merely as an artistic gesture . Does Satan ever threaten people with the police ? But my un

u . fort nate friend did And, in general , has any ” body ever seen s uch a Satan ? He stretched his hand out to me in an e fiective gesture—and the reply to this was another out b f o . urst laughter The Cardinal , too , laughed, s a and Toppi alone shook his wise head, as if to y “ Idiots ! ”

I think Magnus must have noticed that . Or else a he fell into intoxic tion . Or was it because that spirit of murder with which his soul was aflame could not remain passive and was tearing at the lo . ex leash He threateningly shook his heavy, p sive head and shouted “ Enough of this laughter ! It is silly. Why ? are you so sure of yourselves It is stupid , I tell you . I believe in nothing and that is why I admit

ever thin W on de r o o d : y g. Press my hand , g they are all fools and I am quite ready to admit that 261 ’ Satan s Diary

you are Satan . Only you have fallen into a bad t mess , friend Sa an . Because it will not save you . I will soon throw you out anyhow ! Do you hear devil ? ” He shook his finger at me threate ningly an d hi s then lapsed into thought , dropping head low and hi s i e heavily, with red eyes ablaze , l ke thos

i . of a bull, ready to hurl h mself upon his enemy The aides an d the insulted Cardinal were silent

with confusion . Magnus again sho ok his finger at me significantly and s aid “ ’ e If you are Satan , then you ve com here too ? late . Do you understand What did you come a ? s a ? ? here for, nyway To play, you y To tempt To laugh at us human beings ? To invent some ? sort of a new, evil game To make us dance to — ’ ? . your tune Well , you re too late You should have come earlier, for the earth is grown now and m no longer needs your talents . I speak not of y s self, who deceived you so ea ily and took away

your money : I , Thomas Ergo . I speak not of

Maria . But look at these modest little friends of mine : where in your hell will you find such ch arm ? ing, fearles s devils , ready for any task And yet l — a e they are so sma l , they will not even find a pl c ” in history . It was after this that Thomas Magnus blew me ni up, in the holy city of Rome , in the Palazzo Orsi , 262