Our sit-down We apologize with Meghan and in advance Harry was better The Natir Vol. 10, No. 35 Copyright © 2020-21 The Natir March 2021 Student Gov. iffy on peaceful transfer of power Lashes out at The Natir for posing question JAMES HEALY ’22 IN THIS In recent weeks, there has been a growing tension in the hallways at St. Rita, and it isn’t the worry of whether or not there will be ISSUE: chicken tenders in the dining hall for lunch. It seems that this tension is stemming from the growing concern of a peaceful transition of power A retrospective from the current Student Government administration to the upcoming administration following the next election of officers. Even walking of St. Rita’s down the hallway elicits a conversation between students about this issue. rich tradition of “Isn’t that the group that puts the terrible music on the announcements?” said a freshman who spoke on the condition of anonymity due to not March football being sure of his own name. “Yeah, I don’t know. I don’t like them, I guess.” P. 5 The Natir also reached out to Student Government for its official thoughts regarding this issue. The following has been edited for clarity and length: The Natir: Many students have been submitting this question recently to us at The Natir--will you commit to a peaceful transition next school year? Student Government: You know, that is a great question you just asked right there, and to all the great students who submitted that question. You see, we’ve done tremendous things for this school in the past year. The things we accomplished this year have never been seen before. We’ve had all these people--big, tough seniors and juniors--come up to us with tears in their eyes saying, “Sir, congratulations, you guys have done things that I had never imagined possible. Four different types of fries? Remarkable.” And you know that isn’t just one instance. We’ve had experts--experts--well, they’re friends of ours, quite frankly, come up to us and say the same exact things. Wealthy alumni. Major spenders. It’s truly amazing what we’ve done, even with the pandemic and the impeachment hoax by the sophomore class. Freshmen asked TN: Okay, thank you… but will you commit to a peaceful transition next school year? to not include SG: You know that’s a nasty question you asked right there--nasty--but, A menacing recent photo of the current Student Government used masks in you know, we expect nothing less of you. You know what? Sure. TN: Okay, thank you… so you will commit to a peaceful transition of power in Student Government next year? typical lunch SG: I just said it. What are you talking about? You see, groups like you guys, The Natir, are why we won the election. The students of St. Rita know that you guys are full of it--fake news. Radical lamestream press. Enemy of the people. TN: Okay, thank you… in other news, students are demanding that Student Government listen to their suggestions on bringing back trades musical chairs. Where does Student Government stand on that issue? SG: Well, we’ve been talking about it. Lots of people talking about it. Our administration is making bringing back musical chairs a P. 5 priority. “The Chairs,” I call it, many people call it. We feel it’s good for the people, for the country, really. And unfortunately the radical Blue Group students are unwilling to compromise with us as to bringing back The Chairs. Why not The Chairs? If it wasn’t for them, we’d be playing The Chairs every day during lunch and afterschool and truly show our core value of Unitas together. We’ve always been big on Unitas. Longtime Unitas guys. What can we say? You know where they don’t have the chairs? China. Despite being called “fake news” by the official representative government of the study body, The Natir would like to let all St. Rita students know that we are committed to providing you the most reliable and trustworthy newspaper that St. Rita has to offer. The Natir will continue to produce its world-renowned publications despite the opinions of the useless Student Government.

Dolan person of interest in Smithsonian artifact heist SAUL GARCIA ’21 The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) announced in a out some of what he was saying. He was going on about how they press release that it had identified several persons of interest in needed to meet up somewhere so he could drop off the relic before connection to a break-in and robbery at the Smithsonian Museum. everything gets out in the open. That’s all I know.” An investigation will commence on these suspects in connection Another St. Rita senior, Nicholas O’Neil, declined to speak with the crime dating back to the year 2006. Among those being with the FBI and avoided them by converting to full-remote for investigated as a person of interest is St. Rita Latin and Ancient his classes. Speaking with The Natir, he seemingly confirmed that History teacher and Scholastic Bowl coach, Mr. Buddy Dolan. Dolan acted as a sinister mastermind in executing the robbery. Evidence released to the public by the FBI has indicated that “I was reading somewhere that in 2006, the Smithsonian had a After several Dolan is a prime suspect in the case. Several bowties and Harry Muppets exhibit at the American History Museumm” O’Neill said Potter-like glasses were uncovered at the scene. Security footage via email. “Magister Dolan is certainly a clever one, and it seems more injuries, retrieved from the date of the break-in revealed a man of small to me that this and the robbery both occurring in 2006 were no stature picking locks with the ends of glasses and swiping ancient coincidence. He was talking one day in class a few years back World Languages artifacts. What cannot be scientifically explained is the fact that the when I was a freshman about the Muppets, and he was fascinated man, wearing a dark hoodie, ran at near-supersonic speed, with his with Bert and the way he dressed. I wouldn’t be surprised if he Dept. vows to re- legs cycling at the speed of light. Comic book enthusiasts thought orchestrated his getaway by disguising himself as Bert in the at first that The Flash was indeed real, but hospital records obtained Muppet display. He has the clothes needed to pull it off and he fits examine National by The Natir confirmed that a man by the name of Torol Sadeas right in.” Foreign Language checked in for a bionic-leg operation, granting him robotic legs. It has been confirmed that Mr. Dolan will be monitored by an FBI officials even went as far as to pay St. Rita visits in search of FBI agent while he teaches his classes and attends St. Rita daily. Week tradition of potential clues. One student, senior Eric Seo, was asked about any Rumors have been circulating that he may resign as coach of the suspicious behavior demonstrated by Magister Dolan. scholastic bowl team and transfer power to Mr. McIntosh. His hallway ‘Running “Magister Dolan has always had a mysterious way about him, electronic devices are currently under 24/7 surveillance during the but he’s been acting strange since this investigation was launched,” investigation, including bugging the stylish lamp in his classroom. of the Seniors’ said Seo. “He’s been constantly on his phone exchanging messages The bowties have suddenly disappeared and the style of glasses and emails with people. He always steps out of class now and then that he wears has changed. All items in his room that have some P. 5 to take an important phone call, but he answers the phone call in a sort of connection to ancient history have been removed as well, different language each time. There was one phone call where he even the student-made projects. No one knows for sure where this This official school photo showing Dolan looking spoke fluent Latin with the other person, and I was able to make is heading, but it isn’t looking good for Magister Dolan. particularly menacing doesn’t help his case. STRITAHS.COM A2 • LOCAL THE NATIR • MARCH 2021 Partacz challenges fav teacher SR student Instagram poll results, claims fraud JAKE MARSZEWSKI ’22

The highly contested, student-ran faculty member poll on the St. Rita Stable Instagram page caused a rift in the St. Rita family. Every student was competitive in the voting process, sticking by their favorite candidate. It was even rumored that junior class supporters of Mr. Reed would go on a hunger strike if he lost, adding more competition and incentive to win. Teachers even campaigned to students in order to win the title (or maybe they just wanted the reward of an Amazon gift card). But still, no matter the reward, the battle was a heated one. One matchup, however, took the spotlight among the school. In the first round, Dean and math teacher Mr. Partacz faced off against his- tory teacher Mr. Pazin. Hopes were high for Partacz, but they would soon be crushed. Pazin opened with a strong lead, and that lead would only grow larger. The history teacher ended up winning by a massive margin, and he even went on to win the entire tournament. Partacz’s defeat sent shock waves across St. Rita, even prompting a graphic made by St. Rita Stable of Partacz being “torched” by Pazin. from the St. Rita Stable Instragram Partacz was outraged by the results. Many of his supporters came to the presence at St. Rita, and based off of my experience I know that there is no conclusion that there must have been fraud in the polling process, as no other way that I got as little votes as he did,” he said recently over the P.A. after matchup had that large of a margin of victory. Partacz eventually launched an requesting that teachers check their A period students for dress code violations. investigation, and anonymous sources claim that he, along with other teachers “Because of my high status, I was able to have a look inside the St. Rita Stable recruited to help with the investigation, threatened to dock points on the as- account, and I can confirm that there was fraud in the polling, but I can’t tell signments of students who did not comply with investigations of fraud (known you specifically. That will come out at a later date.” as the Aidan Connolly Paradox). Another mode of interrogation even involved The student who runs the account, Student Government President Connolly, replacing the morning temperature check with the questioning of students, with has said that nobody has accessed the account other than him, and he dismisses those who said they didn’t believe there was voter fraud involved being dispro- the rumor supposedly leaked from the Partacz campaign that Connolly’s appli- portionately sent home for temperatures supposedly exceeding 110 degrees. cations to forty-seven elite universities and the accompanying essays and letter Students had mixed opinions on the investigations, including seasoned gam- of recommendation needed may have accidentally included the password to the bler and Pazin-voter Aidan Devlin. “I have supported Mr. Pazin the whole way Instagram account. throughout this election,” said the St. Rita junior, “and I know many other valid This all still has not stopped multiple prominent members of Partacz’s classes voters who feel the same way. There is no way there has been fraud. Besides, I with B+ averages from claiming that the election was stolen from their favorite bet $15 on his win anyways, so I don’t want any fraud overturning my win- teacher. Even after the many claims, there seems to be no proof of voter fraud nings.” in this case, meaning that Pazin is the true favorite faculty member, and he can Partacz maintains that his campaign has evidence of fraud. “I have a strong relish that with his Amazon gift card. St. Rita purchases actual mustang as mascot to be COVID-safe JOSHUA CARROLL ’22 Working in a mascot costume is an exhausting job. The costume is heavy and mustang. The science department is developing an Introduction to Veterinary has no ventilation, which makes it hard for the person who wears them. The Medicine course, and the class will be hands-on experience with the mustang. Mustang mascot is a tradition at St. Rita sporting events. Ritamen who have With the health risks associated with wearing the costume during Covid, the in- had the privilege to wear the costume had to push beyond the discomfort and vestment in a mustang is considered a smart one by the school community. St. stifling conditions to put smiles on the faces of many St. Rita fans. Earning the Rita continues to be ahead of the curve. This innovative approach of maintain- mascot job is an honor, but Covid has elevated the health risk of being cooped ing a school mascot will further school spirit that generations of Ritamen and up in costume and social distancing. With sports seasons resuming in early fans will enjoy. Go Mustangs! 2021, the school administration assembled to reconsider the health risks of students who wear the mascot costume. In order to carry on the legacy of the Mustang and to protect the health of students, St. Rita’s administration made the groundbreaking decision to purchase a horse. The University of Georgia has Uga the bulldog, the University of Colorado has Ralphie the Buffalo, and the University of Texas has Bevo the Longhorn. Now, St. Rita has their very own mustang. It is another example of the school continuing its excellence in setting the bar high in high school sports. Plans are being made to hold a fundraiser to win the naming rights to the mustang. Students need to sell twenty raffle tickets at ten dollars each, and the winner will name the mustang with approval of the administration. “Yeah, we’re not giving a kid carte blanche on naming rights,” said school principal Sante Iacovelli. “We’re well-aware of the infamous Boaty McBoat- face.” That is a reference to the British government allowing the Internet to name a $287 million research ship, with predictable absurd results. At halftime of the biggest football game of the season, the winning ticket will be selected. Fans are anxious to get back into stadiums, gymnasiums, pools, and whatever cross country does their thing in. The addition of a horse to St. Rita’s campus opens up many new doors for the school to explore. Mustang rides will be offered whenever possible. At open houses, young siblings will be able to pay three dollars for one lap around the track. At Winterfest, parents will be given the opportunity to take a photo on the mustang. For an extra fee at all events, fans can buy carrots and feed the mustang. It will be a great way to bring the whole family to events, while also bringing in revenue to the school. There are a few ideas already being worked out for both disciplinary and educational purposes. The discipline office is excited because this provides new options for Saturday JUG. The mustang will need to be fed, brushed, and the stall will need to be cleaned. Instead of putting up chairs in the lunchroom and cleaning classrooms, students will have to scoop horse manure and re-shoe the The Mustang costume will be mothballed until the CDC says otherwise. STRITAHS.COM A3 • LOCAL THE NATIR • MARCH 2021 SR gains edge by creating dozens of Remote learning test scores suggest Instagram accounts second-semester ‘senioritis-free’ THOMAS GLEASON ’21 THOMAS GLEASON ’21 St. Rita celebrates its fiftieth Ins- attention to the St. Rita network, Senioritis has plagued high school ture than generations before them. “I tagram page this week as it adds many regard one of the earliest ac- seniors for thousands of years all always knew it, but my son is simply “stritachair5” to the growing number counts to pop up as the key to later across the world. Evidence has linked immune to senioritis,” explained one of pages the school has rolled out this accounts’ success. The “stritastable” ancient cave drawings of early humans mother whose son is fully remote, year. A collaboration between the stu- has garnered an Oscar nomination in to a lack of motivation in their final “unlike the more troublesome students dent government, admissions office, the “Best Short Film” category for year of education. of the class before his.” and every other office in the school its cinematic depiction of a teacher But today senioritis looks like a black Many people have wondered about the has dramatically increased St. Rita’s vs teacher bracket earlier this year. screen with a disconnected micro- “new normal” after the coronavirus, social media reach. Many St. Rita Instagrammers believe phone. but in regard to senioritis, if the Class In an effort to spread the St. Rita mes- that this account paved the way In a recent study conducted by The of 2021 is any indicator, perhaps that sage to as many people as possible, for accounts like “stritalocker” and Natir, seniors were questioned about is a thing of the past. The grades don’t the student government thought it was “stritacloset.” what senioritis looks like in a year lie--these second-semester seniors are best to create an enormous amount Student Government will continue to where a sick day lasts two weeks and producing results. of Instagram accounts so that no expand its Instagram game and bring poor internet connection means a day one could miss their content. Many up brand new content in its ploy for a off. are fearful that without a significant monopoly over highschool Instagram. “I am more motivated than ever,” online presence, the school will fail to This way no prospective student will exclaimed one senior who has not reach Generation Zoom and beyond. be able to see other high school posts seen the inside of a classroom in nine “It’s a simple algorithm actually,” and will only know to attend St. Rita. months. He noted that he can’t even explained Student Government Vice The only question left to each St. Rita recall where his khaki pants even are. President Michael Gaughan, “We keep student is how many accounts they “The virtual environment is much adding new accounts and they each will follow in order to show them their better for learning and my test scores gain their own number of followers. unwavering devotion to St. Rita pride. prove that,” described another senior So instead of a hundred followers on who has yet to take a test outside of one account, we can have five hundred his bedroom this school year. followers across five accounts.” The results from many student Many are quick to criticize the strat- responses indicate a dramatic decrease egy and call for the abolishment of in senioritis this year. Furthermore, unnecessary accounts. “It is a politi- their test scores and overall grades cally corrupt system,” argues senior have seen peaks that prove they are Screen shot of a senior acing a recent test Saul Garcia. “They are inflating the more motivated and paying closer number of followers by creating new attention than the past three years they accounts and forcing people to follow have been at high school. them all.” St. Rita parents have praised their high As more accounts begin to bring school seniors for being far more ma- ‘Ritamen Weep’ actually make people weep MATTHEW MARIOTTI ’22 Many people around St. Rita are confused about how the school’s pre-show talk. improv troupe got its name, Ritamen Weep, so The Natir sat down with Mr. In addition to the lack of audience, missing members, and Maikisch, Petrich, the moderator of the troupe and the man who proudly named it. When the improvisers claim to have one other reason for their weeping: a lack of asked about the origin of the name, he said that it is a playoff of the well- funding. The improvisers claim that they do not even have enough money known song titled “Read ‘em and Weep.” to buy themselves a pop to share from the vending machine (pre-Covid, of While this might sound clever, many professional improvisers course). Furthermore, Petrich recently informed the improvisers that he wants disagree with Petrich because they do not read anything while improvising and to sign them up for improv classes. These classes would help the improvisers they are certainly not good enough to make anyone actually cry from laughter. sharpen their improv skills and teach them how to produce an online show Therefore, when asked why they think the troupe’s name is Ritamen Weep, the since they are unable to perform in-person due to Covid. The only problem is improvisers said because they cry about various topics relating to the troupe. the large sum of money needed to pay for these classes. When Mr. Petrich told One of these topics is audience attendance, which is so bad that the improvisers that he asked for school funding and was waiting to hear back, when the administration was writing the social distancing portion of the Covid the improvisers actually started to weep because they knew that they would guidelines for reopening the school, they asked the improvisers how they man- never get it. aged to keep so many people away from their shows. The improvisers laughed, but they should have realized that the administration was being serious because *Update* the only people who attend their shows are the parents of the student perform- The school has paid for the classes out of the exorbitant budget normally set ers like Matthew Mariotti and Mike Baniewicz. Not even the students show aside for mass song sheets. up, regardless of how much extra credit their teachers offer them to attend the shows. Audience attendance is so bad at times that the improvisers do not show up, but the worst of all was when Petrich himself did not even show up. This caused the improvisers to put on a show without an adult in charge. Thankfully, then- St. Rita senior Chudi Martin took charge. “It was an interesting experience to say the least,” said Martin, a current first-year college student. “As you know, the show did not run smoothly and we were all over the place.” The lack of adult supervision caused the improvisers to make some jokes that offended the little audience that they had. Needless to say, Ms. Mai- kisch was forced to come and whip the improvisers into shape before their next performance. Some improvisers claim to still be weeping due to Maikisch’s

STRITAHS.COM A3 • NATIONAL THE NATIR • MARCH 2021 Americans shocked that storming, vandalizing Capitol doesn’t make America “Great Again” MIKE BANIEWICZ ’22 Pfizer to mass-distribute WASHINGTON— The promising year of 2021 began American flag upside down which was embarrassing for in complete chaos with rioters who were contesting the all fellow patriots.” Covid vaccine via McRibs defeat of Donald Trump in the November presidential The Natir compiled a timeline of events in Washington election storming the U.S. Capitol and insurrectionists D.C. during the Capitol siege. Some of the festivities MIKE BANIEWICZ ’22 vandalizing the offices of Senators and members of the that lead up to the chaos were the following: In an unprecedented effort to distribute the House. The rioters’ attempt to stop the electoral count --Trump’s WH speech asked for his supporters to edu- Covid-19 vaccine to people across the nation, was only postponed as former VP Mike Pence stayed cate lawmakers with a War of 1812 historical reenact- Pfizer is partnering with McDonald’s. It was up past his bedtime to confirm the election results at ment on Pennsylvania Avenue reported last Tuesday that the pharmaceutical 3:40 A.M. However, some of the biggest news from the --QAnon members set up a merchandise stand and company made the decision to strengthen ties country’s most recent coup wasn’t even the event itself, handed out assorted animal skins for warmth with the famous fast food chain after noticing but rather the immediate reactions some citizens shared --Rioters broke into the Senate Chamber, and Josh the sudden increase in coronavirus infections with this reporter as they watched the chaos unfold. Hawley quick-changed into Crossing Guard uniform around the globe. Yesterday, The Natir talked “I was absolutely appalled by the horrific actions car- and heroically directed rioters towards Speaker Pelosi’s with a spokesperson for McDonald’s, Ronald ried out by the MAGA supporters on January 6th,” said office McDonald, to discuss the details about the new one Knoxville, Tennessee woman recalling the events of Eventually, former President Donald Trump realized relationship between Pfizer and McDonald’s. that day. “The whole time I was watching the news I was that the pro-Trumpers who were ransacking the Capitol The Natir: What started the partnership between disgusted at the fact that many of the rioters were not may steal his twenty bins of Diet Coke that he had you and Pfizer? wearing masks at all. Everyone knows that if you want stashed in Ted Cruz’s office. Fearing the worst for his McDonald: Well, Pfizer contacted me last week to take control over the Capitol building, you also need prized low-calorie beverage, Trump took to Twitter and and expressed their interest about utilizing our to wear a mask to hide your identity. And, some of the released a minute video of himself asking his supporters food to distribute their new vaccine in a more people entering the Capitol building were holding the to “go home in peace” and that he felt their pain. efficient and cheap manner. TN: How, exactly, do you plan to get the corona- Diet Coke sales plummet after Biden removes virus vaccine to the public via McDonald’s food? RM: At first, Pfizer and I asked ourselves the Trump’s Oval Office button same question, until an unexpected solution ZACHARY BAXTROM ’24 popped out of the blue. One of the members of President Joe Biden is working to fight the COVID don’t get that back?” Trump asked defiantly. “I can getMcDonald’s corporate had an idea of using the pandemic in America, sending U.S. citizens stimulus a new one whenever I want.” most popular item on our menu so that most cus- checks, and he’s … taken Donald Trump’s Diet Coke Since the election, Trump supporters have also tomers would receive the vaccine. Obviously, we button out of the Oval Office? stopped buying Diet Coke, since they like to follow settled on our most popular product, the McRib. While Trump was in office, he had a button that he his every move. Trump alone made up a significant TN: As you know the McRib is a limited time could press for someone to deliver him a Diet Coke portion of Diet Coke sales in his presidency, and the menu item for McDonald’s. That being the case, while he was working. Sounds pretty normal consider- drop in sales has Coca-Cola stock quite low right will this McRib vaccine be available for only a ing that he was the president, and the president should now. As this happens, AMC and GameStop stock are couple months? be able to have a Diet Coke delivered to him at any skyrocketing. RM : I’m so glad you asked me that! Because time. All of this because of the White House Diet Coke but- by choosing the McRib as our #1 product to But it has been reported that Trump would drink up to ton. Or lack thereof. distribute the Covid-19 vaccine, McDonald’s has agreed to extend the date for the availability of twelve Diet Cokes a day while in office. So if Trump our McRib vaccine year-round. was the president for 1,460 days, and he drank 12 TN: Obviously many other institutions distribut- Cokes a day every day, that would be 17,520 Cokes ing the Pfizer vaccine require people to apply to during his presidency, though many of those would prove they qualify for their first dose. To receive have been consumed at his various golf properties that the McRib vaccine, are there certain groups of he traveled to 298 times, or more than one-fifth of his people that are eligible to receive their first dose time as president. (The Natir could not confirm if all compared to others that will have to wait? of the properties had their own Diet Coke button or if RM : We operate on a first come first serve basis. the former president traveled with a portable button.) In fact, the system we devised works like this. After hearing about his button being taken out, Trump You come into McDonald’s, ask for a McRib was not happy. As Biden took the Coke button out of “COVID Style”, we cook up the McRib, inject the Oval Office, he also took out portraits like that of the vaccine into it, and serve it to you hot on a former president Andrew Jackson, according to CNN. bun. The only difference is with this purchase He replaced the portraits with pictures of figures like you get a little gift to show off that you received MLK and Rosa Parks. That is the least of Trump’s your first dose. The gift is a miniature Dr. Fauci action figure. Some of the special features of the worries, though. Dr. Fauci toy is being able to recite his famous “I really don’t care about Joe taking out the picture catchphrases such as, “Wear ya mask, practice of that guy on the twenty-dollar bill,” Trump said. “I social distancing” and “Do not inject yaself with only use hundreds anyway. I don’t understand why cleaning products.” he would take that Coke button out. I mean, who TN: Final question--“Why McDonald’s?” Why wouldn’t want a delicious, refreshing, ice-cold Diet not any other popular fast food chain? Coke whenever they desired?” The late soda-ordering button, as it appeared on the Oval RM: Well...ever since Pfizer found out that The worst part is that Biden did not even think about Office desk during Trump’s tenure Burger King was anti-vaxx, we were the best giving Trump his button back. “He thinks I care if I alternative. Atlanta Falcons File Lawsuits Against Teams They Blew Leads Against CHRISTIAN MORALES ’23 Earlier this week, the owner of the Atlanta Falcons, Arthur Blank, practice. Sleepy Joe. I’m telling you, the Falcons and Rudy must fight like with the help of Rudy Giuliani, filed lawsuits against all of the The lawsuits were so idiotic that even members of the team got hell, or else they’re not gonna have a chance of winning anymore.” teams they blew leads against during the 2020 NFL season, claim- angry at the organization for them. Quarterback Matt Ryan was NFL commissioner Roger Goodell could not be reached for com- ing that the games were rigged contests. especially angered. ment, but a spokesperson said, “The league is just happy to have “It’s so obvious that these games were rigged from the start,” “Maybe fix the defense,” said the veteran while still skaken from football back. Even Atlanta Falcons football.” said Giuliani, who is an expert in dealing with allegedly fraudulent his team blowing a 28-3 lead to New England in Super Bowl LI. “I contests, having represented former President Trump in challenging mean, we lost to the Lions and the Bears. That’s how incompetent the 2020 election results. “These teams clearly found points stashed we are.” in a pile after the games, which led to their victory. No way that the Star wide receiver Julio Jones was very angry as well. He imme- Falcons could constantly blow these leads, it’s impossible.” diately requested a trade to an actually competent organization. Most teams reacted with extreme laughter when they heard the Despite the absolute stupidity of these lawsuits, there is somehow news. They genuinely didn’t think the Falcons were being serious. support for them, most notably from the Los Angeles Chargers, also “Dan Quinn made Matt Nagy look like Bill Belichick’’ said noted for choking enormous leads, including 2020 games against Chicago Bears general manager Ryan Pace, the genius who traded the Kansas City Chiefs and the New Orleans Saints. up to draft Mitchell Trubisky, who recently signed as a free agent “I support the Falcons in their plight,” said former President with the Buffalo Bills. Trump on his burner Twitter account. “We’ve both experienced Other teams made similar remarks. “The Falcons and blowing a a huge amount of fraud this past year, never seen before. And lead to Tom Brady; what else is new?” said Buccaneers head coach it’s true. The Falcons would be Super Bowl champs, and I would Bruce Arians while watching Tom Brady coach the team during still be President if it wasn’t for all the fraud by both the NFL and Lawyers making a case for a particularly egregious Falcons choke job

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