Forever in Our Hearts by Derrick Gravener
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Publisher: J.Bermudez Formatter: R.McCormick Inside this issue: Bookface 3 Those Crazy peo- 4 Volume V, Issue iii Wednesday, November 9th, 2011 ple called friends Haru Sushi 5 Forever in our hearts By Derrick Gravener The Walking Dead 7 Sabres, this is a reminder that tomorrow (November 10th) is our annual Peace Ceremony in Men’s Fashion 8 honour of those who were lost in the wars past and present. Women’s Fashion 9 Our SLC members, band and Diwali 11 choir members, and staff mem- bers are busily preparing for the Occupy Movement 12 school wide assembly tomor- row, so remember that this is a solemn event where behavior must be at its peak of perfec- Unsung Heroes 14 tion. Think before you pull out your iPhone and start texting or Artist of the 15 whispering loudly to your Month neighbour about your Hallow- een weekend. There will be When you put on your poppy, Don Cherry 16 time for that later on, but this think about whose families have is an occasion that only comes been affected by war and that EpicMealTime 17 once a year and affects every- people in our armed forces con- one. Don’t forget that clapping Sabre FM 18 tinue to die everyday. doesn’t take place at anytime Dangers of Face- 19 during the ceremony as this is book to show respect for all those who we’ve lost and continue to Reason to Watch 20 lose everyday in wars. Jersey Shore Movie Quiz 21 Career Corner 23 Put some Deo on that BO By Chandler McCorkindale Seniors Soccer 23 Mr. Ms. Love 24 When I was just a lil’ gapher I year olds I would begin to stink. realized that for whatever rea- My parents quickly realized I Eating Disorder 25 son (growth hormones adminis- had quite a stench and so they tered by my parents) I grew a bought me one of the greatest How to Get 26 lot faster than all the other lil’ inventions known to Around gaphers and gapherellas. One of man...deodorant! New Taxes 27 the biggest setbacks of growing faster than everyone else was Halloween 27 that for whatever reason after -Con’t. next page You had better be we aring my 300lb bench pressing ses- this... sions with all the other seven Page 2 Put some Deo on that BO con’t. By Chandler McCorkin Deodorant was a life changing gift for me partly be soon as they caught a whiff of me. People always sa next to godliness," and with deodorant I was a god staple in my life and it needs to be a staple in my cause it meant people would stop dying as dale ying to me, “Chandler, my boy, cleanliness is In our school there has been cleanliness genocide. who smelt like an Irish spring. Deodorant is a alarming rates and it needs to come to an end now, fellow Sabres' lives. a person to not wear deodorant and make the rest of You don't want to have deal with the stench all day. Honestly do you like People have stopped wearing deodorant at to do this, do you? don’t. Really it isn’t that hard to apply stick or the fact of the matter is that it is just rude for school in the morning, and if you are one of those us who do put a stick in our pits have to deodorant to school with you. Trust me no one will smelling like a hot bag of garbage all day? I sure rotting milk smell you are about to start giving ofspray deodorant to yourself before you come to where we forget the deodorant and just squeeze ourpeople who sweat constantly then bring your “ room we are in doesn’t fill up with the toxic gas t In our school make fun of you for saving them from the back pack is a splendid idea. Also if you don’t own f. Now I understand we all have those days th buy you a stick for your own sake. ere has been pits together as hard as we can so the class- hat is us, but that is why the deodorant in the cleanliness For me personally I find that if I am not wearing d deodorant please come see me because I will like everyone around me can smell me and they are j genocide!” dead dog. It is the worst feeling in the world to m misery to others (especially the grade eights that eodorant I feel terrible about myself and I feel charged for assault with a deadly odour. I know it ust too polite to tell me that I smell like a smell is making it hard for you to be around them be because I know that my stench is bringing stanky as long as you word it nicely. are at my pit-level) and honestly one time I was is incredibly hard to tell someone that their When people try to tell other people, especially pe ut trust people will want to know if they are issue it can be tough. It is hard to find the corre they will react and how to word it nicely. I would smelling like the backside of a cow” in front of al ople they are close with that they have a odour cruel and the person may decide to be spiteful andct words to say because you have no idea how you and the smelly suspect have a minute alone yousuggest that you don’t say “La’Quisha you be today and that you understand because you yourselfl your friends and classmates because that is just deodorant and hopefully they will get the message. smell even more. I highly recommend when then there is a website for you: http://www.stenchi just politely tell them that they smell a little to the stinker of your choice letting them know the smell all the time, then offer them a stick of Although if you don’t have nerves of steel So please for my sake and your fellow Sabres’ sake nformer.com sends an anonymous message y smell. don't smell after the bell “So please for my sake and your fellow Sabres sake don't smell after the bell” Volume V, Issue iii BookFace:Dishwasher By Frances Miltimore Everyone has goals, some are Page 3 more realistic than others and some are rather far-fetched. Pete Jordan’s goal was a far- fetched one. From 1981-2001 Pete worked on his mission and eventually wrote a book of his A real BookFace journey to becoming an unlikely hero of the dishwash- ing world. Dishwasher tells of one chap’s ambition to scrub dishes in all fifty states. With an inability to stay in one place for too long Pete’s compulsive decisions take him on the trek of his lifetime. Pete trudges from hippie gatherings to kid’s camps to fancy theatres as he dishes his way throughout the USA. His food consists of cus- tomer’s leftover scraps (mmm can find. Pete gets little under- yeah) or the cheapest meal he standing from people but as his journey progresses he obtains constantly on the look-out for thousands of fans, soon people new streets to explore, coins to are writing him and even buy- find, and Kraft-Dinner to mow. ing t-shirts. Fellow dishers Somewhere along the way Pete praise him for successfully Jordan finds his true self and slacking through life and offer with that came a lover, Amy up places for Pete to crash Joy. After years of Pete refusing should he stop by their state to grow up he finds himself anytime. He is soon asked onto alone, ----his fans forget about the Letterman Show. But that’s him, his fellow dishers are now not what Pete is about, all he chefs and because of his age wants is to wash dishes and dejection meets him at jobs meet friends along the way. To where he was once hired on Letterman’s embarrassment, the spot. Pete takes on the task Pete dupes him hardcore and to stop bumbling through life, continues on his way. but after years of constant movement will he be able to? “His fans forget He leaves behind friend after about him, his friend as he weaves from state to state quitting and being fired fellow dishers are from numerous dishwashing now chefs and jobs. His compelling mind often because of his gets him into absurd situations that even Pete himself ques- age dejection tions. He is an honest dish dog, meets him at jobs with the exception of stealing beer from his bosses, and is where he was once hired on the spot. “ Page 4 Those crazy people called friends By Nicole Wallace What would we do without our friends? They pull us up when were down, give good and bad advice, have our backs, and hold all the best memories. Friends are what keep the world together. If we were all enemies can you imagine what the world would be like? Probably not a very nice place, unless you like world destruction. I can honestly say that I could not survive without my friends. The truth is without friend’s life would be pretty dull. The crazy things you do wouldn't be nearly as satisfying with out friends to enjoy them with. The best kind of friend isn't those who judge you but those who join you in your crazy antics.