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Wednesday, July 01 | the Bleat Wednesday, July 01 | The Bleat. 11/1/13, 9:08 AM ABOUT Search B&W World: It! The Thing From Way the Hell Out There! RECENT COMMENTS Out of Context Ad Challenge polymathamy on 06.14.12 Bleat Amanda from Michigan on Boo. Hiss WEDNESDAY, JULY 01 Julie on Testing the new RSS feed idea on JULY 1, 2009 · 49 COMMENTS · in DOMESTIC LIFE, MATCHBOOKS, WOOF shesnailie on Autobots and Bruckner Wagner von Drupen- Sachs on Autobots and Brrr is not a word that should come to mind the day before July, but the most Bruckner recent effects of climate turbulence – I believe that’s the new term – pushed temps down way below normal. Cloudy, windy, cool. Weather like this 140 OR SO usually hits about two weeks after the Halloween decorations go up in Target. Error: Twitter did not respond. Please wait a few minutes and refresh this page. When I dressed for work today I thought “I should put on a white shirt, in case the Supreme Court decision comes in.” You know the feeling, right? It’s CLICK – AND SAVE! new to me. I got distracted, wore a green linen shirt, and headed in for meetings. Wouldn’t you know it: the decision came in, for Franken, as everyone expected. This meant we had to go live, and as strange as it sounds for a newspaper to go live, that’s what we do: wrangle a journo, pat the face, hook up the mike, and go. I got the decision a few minutes before we went on, got cross-eyed at the legalese, had another cup of coffee, and off we went. What fun. There was even real BREAKING NEWS handed to me during the broadcast, and if I tried to resist saying This Just In, I don’t think I managed. At the end of the day I went to pick up daughter, and stopped at the nearby Humane Society to see the dogs. No, Jasper’s fine. From last evening: A BOOK I RECOMMEND http://lileks.com/bleat/?p=2746 Page 1 of 15 Wednesday, July 01 | The Bleat. 11/1/13, 9:08 AM Child 44 Tom Rob Smith Best Price $0.02 or Buy New Privacy Information THE PAST AT YOUR FINGERTIPS NOVEMBER 2013 S M T W T F S 1 2 But you never know when you’ll find some slow old mutt who makes his case 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 with mute eloquence. A ghastly animal racket came from the back of the 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 building, barking and screeching, as if they were attempting to make some 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 dog-monkey hybrid. With saws. I’m serious: monkeys. I have no idea what the rhubarb was about, but you can guess: the monkeys were shouting WOLF 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 WOLF WOLF GO AWAY I JUMP UP AND DOWN AT YOU GO AWAY and the « Jul dogs were barking horrible not-man thing, what the hell On and on it went. THE DISTANT PAST Inside it was sad, but it’s always sad at the shelter. A few of the dogs had signs July 2013 on their pens indicating they’d be sprung tomorrow by a new family, but this could be the shelter version of Carousel in “Logan’s Run.” (Or the Lottery in June 2013 “The Island,” which I watched last night. Watched isn’t the right word; more May 2013 like absorbed while shielding crucial organs from repeated blows.) Some April 2013 dogs you want to coach: buddy, this isn’t how you get adopted. Do not bark at March 2013 people while staring out of the corner of your eyes; you look like a psycho. Look at Buddy, here – relaxed mouth, tongue hanging out, tail wagging – February 2013 people think that means he’s happy – and a general yes boss whatever you say January 2013 boss you’re the greatest I’m sure glad you’re running the pack attitude. December 2012 There was a striking Aussie Cattle Dog who met your gaze with forthright November 2012 defiance: October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 http://lileks.com/bleat/?p=2746 Page 2 of 15 Wednesday, July 01 | The Bleat. 11/1/13, 9:08 AM August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 He put his paw through the cage to touch my hand. Interesting dog, but he’d chase Jasper around and make his day noisy. March 2010 February 2010 This next one just breaks your heart, doesn’t it. January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 HOST WITH THE MOST http://lileks.com/bleat/?p=2746 Page 3 of 15 Wednesday, July 01 | The Bleat. 11/1/13, 9:08 AM UNTOLD RICHES AWAIT YOU This is just a fragment of the site, you know. Head HERE for the full menu. Enjoy! BLEAT PREMIUM Go HERE to join - for as little as you like. You'll get an email with your passwords. The page for your bonus-secret ulta links is HERE! Why do humans form such kinship bonds with dogs? Oh, gosh, I don’t know. Afterwards I got the kids and took them all home, entertaining them on the way with the story of Amazing Amanda. It was a life-sized doll Natalie had a few years ago. It talked. It knew what day it was. It gently admonished you if you gave it cookies for supper. It was hellspawn, and sometimes we’ll make up dialogue for Amanda expression all sorts of evil deeds in the same singsongy innocent voice. By the time we’d gotten halfway home we had Amanda burning down houses because “Fire is pretty.” I made the neighbors pretty too, mommy. Then piano; I sat in the hallway and tried to stay awake. Perkin’s for supper. There was a clown. There’s often a clown. http://lileks.com/bleat/?p=2746 Page 4 of 15 Wednesday, July 01 | The Bleat. 11/1/13, 9:08 AM She walks around and hands out balloons. It was one of those days where you just aren’t surprised to see a clown in the restaurant. Why not. Bring on the mimes while you’re at it. We played the games on the kid-menu. Natalie had a sensible question: What is a Jinx? http://lileks.com/bleat/?p=2746 Page 5 of 15 Wednesday, July 01 | The Bleat. 11/1/13, 9:08 AM We’ve decided that Patty Pie’s mouth is not the pie-portion of her anatomy, because that would mean her arms come out of her mouth. But it’s still unclear. I revived myself with a flagon of coffee, but I’m still beat and ready for nothing. The week is shaping up to contain an absolute train-wreck of work on Thursday – I have to give another Powerpoint talk, do the TV news thing, AND write a column, quaint as that now sounds. And I’ve been “tasked” to another Top-Secret Thing, this one code-named . PHASE 2. But today will have the usual assortment – Out-of-Context Ad Challenge at 10:00 or so, and a Mpls update later in the day. Right now: the first “What-City-Is-It” cartoon puzzle from a 1948 Sunday Tribune, up at buzz.mn. Oh, I almost forgot: This matchbook appeared a few years ago in the Matchbook Museum; its advertising terms baffled me. I made some guesses, and it turns out I wasn’t far off. The proof? The son of the restaurant’s owner fills us in. Pass it along, if you wish 49 RESPONSES TO wednesday, july 01 hpoulter says: July 1, 2009 at 6:01 am I had the “Preacher style fried chicken” figured out, but “$400 Waffles” just looked like the world’s worst slogan. Amazing to hear from the owner’s son on a two-year old blog post. MarkG says: July 1, 2009 at 6:10 am The mouth is the somewhat u-shaped squiggle under the eyes, that http://lileks.com/bleat/?p=2746 Page 6 of 15 Wednesday, July 01 | The Bleat. 11/1/13, 9:08 AM is on top of the pie-portion of her anatomy. shesnailie says: July 1, 2009 at 6:11 am _@_v – ‘preacher style’? brings whole new meaning to the phrase ‘chickens comin’ home to roost’… Bob says: July 1, 2009 at 6:11 am That IS Patty Pie’s mouth. It ISN’T her arm. It is the arm of a poor unfortunate who got TOO CLOSE! Patty hasn’t yet gulped her prey into her gut to be digested. YUM! Tastes like chicken. hpoulter says: July 1, 2009 at 6:13 am According to the “Word Detective” blog, the words “jinx” and “jinks” (as in “high jinks”) are not related. He says this about “high jinks”: The “jinks” in “high jinks,” meaning “playful, rowdy activity” or “disruptive pranks or unruly behavior” comes from a slightly different Scots dialect sense of “jink” as a noun meaning “game” or “prank.” Apparently “high jinks” in the 16th century was a drinking game (at the time also known as “high pranks”) in which the loser in a throw of dice had to perform a silly task (or drink a certain quantity of alcohol).
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