February 26, 2013 - Uvm, Burlington, Vt Uvm.Edu/~Watertwr - Thewatertower.Tumblr.Com

volume 13 - issue 6 - tuesday, february 26, 2013 - uvm, burlington, vt uvm.edu/~watertwr - thewatertower.tumblr.com by benberrick UVM, we need to have a talk. I know things have been hard lately; with the transfer of presidential power, budget cuts, and communication breakdowns all over the place, it’s been nothing short of crazy out here. I understand that you need to relieve stress and chill out, but I just can’t condone the method that you have cho- sen. Just because everyone else is doing it, doesn’t make it okay, UVM, and no matter what kind of peer pressure is there, I expect better from you. So we need to talk about this. No, I’m not talking about all the mas- turbation—honestly, that’s healthy and in the future I’ll knock before I come in. We need to talk about the Harlem Shake. I know why you did it. Heck, there have been times when I’ve wanted to do it myself. Aft er exploding two weeks ago, the Harlem Shake went from something that only a few weirdo skateboarders did, to a by kerrymartin meme of epidemic proportions. Sure, the Keeping up with national politics, for as a tough contest between two intelli- Davis Center; it’s a point that seems obvi- fi rst couple times it was funny, clever even. all the work it takes, bears bitter fruit. I’m gent, qualifi ed, engaged, and open-minded ous, but is oft en overlooked. But within 48 hours, as with most memes, the kind of guy who attacks political apa- women. However, their diff erences in age, She gave up her councilor chair in 2009 the real junkies took hold and proceeded thy wherever he fi nds it, but I can’t deny background, and education give them to devote more time to her Provost respon- to quite literally fl ail the shake to death. that Congress tends to look like Sisyphus, unique perspectives on Burlington’s most sibilities, but now she’s seeking reelection at Rather than a few inspired videos (We can pushing a rock up a hill and watching it roll contentious issues. a pivotal moment; half of Burlington’s city agree that T-Pain’s and the Dutch Army back down over and over again (just with Prof. Knodell grew up in Seattle and councilors have less than two years of ex- Unit’s version were pretty good), it became a lot more shouting). Progress in Washing- went to Stanford, where she got her B.A. perience, and most of newly elected Mayor a hundred million bland, if not outright ton is slow, results are meaningless to many (’76) and Ph.D. (’84) in Economics. A job Miro Weinberger’s offi ce has less than one. incorrect, clips as more and more people Americans, and voter fatigue plagues citi- at UVM brought her here in 1986, where Th e City of Burlington needs well-seasoned latched on to it in a desperate attempt to zens who trudge to the polls every couple she has lived and involved herself in com- lawmakers right now, and when it comes to stay relevant. Suddenly, the relatively sim- years to choose the prettier of two assholes. experience, Jane’s the name. In her previ- ple formula ceased to hold. But remember, thanks to this thing we the confl icting interests ous terms, she spearheaded issues like the Th e Harlem Shake used to have a ba- call federalism, that there’s another level of of permanent residents and quality of public schools, use of local agri- sic composition: a single, oft en masked, government in town, one where your voice culture, permanent home ownership, and individual dances in a mundane setting might actually be heard. students complicates small business development, and she plans surrounded by people going about their “Almost nothing is more important democracy in college to stay the course. business and receiving no attention. At than local politics,” says Emily Lee, one Even her opponent admits that Jane is the drop, halfway through the 30 second of two women running for Burlington’s areas. “really smart and accomplished,” as Emily video, the world descends into writhing Ward 2 City Council. In what Seven Days put it when I interviewed her at Muddy Wa- chaos—the frame of the video is fi lled with magazine calls “Burlington’s most close- munity-building ever since. Her scholarly ters. “But it’s time for some fresh energy,” costumed dancing people, most of whom ly watched election race this year,” Lee, and political careers are closely aligned: she added, outlining exactly what her per- were not present before the drop. At least, a Democrat, has been braving the cold while she has taught courses such as Mac- spective would bring to Burlington. Unlike this was how it used to be. Within the time- for months, campaigning door-to-door roeconomics and Money & Banking, she her West Coast competitor, Ms. Lee is pure frame of a week literally anything was set against her Progressive opponent, UVM simultaneously has served as a watchdog Vermont: her Green Mountain State roots to the signature music and called a Harlem economics professor and former Provost for Burlington’s banks, a founder of Burl- go back seven generations, and her great- Shake. Jane Knodell. Each of Burlington’s seven ington’s Community & Economic Develop- grandfather Cassius Cobb (UVM Class of Like a beloved child star now high on a wards has two councilors who serve two- ment Offi ce, and a Ward 2 City Councilor 1906) used to lug coal up Old Mill as his cocktail of morphine and cocaine, mashing year terms. I got the chance to sit down for no fewer than seven terms. “City ser- work study job. Emily grew up in Westford, their genitals up against the glass revolving with both candidates and now see the race vices matter,” she told me over coff ee at the VT, with a family that was “constantly on door of a Doubletree in a seedy suburb of ... read the rest on page 3 ... read the rest on page 6 trekkin’ for beer 90’s tv nostalgia forgo the onesie best pandora stations by dansuder by marissabucci by cassidycabrera by lizcantrell news ticker for dt: German poor musn’t cry over spilt milk, ought to eat horsemeat according to PM +++ Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst—Iran to expand nuclear program, Tehran states. g WARD-continued from page 1 the verge of financial collapse.” She went Ms. Lee plans to team up with the to Essex High School, then paid her way university to solve Burlington’s housing through UVM, spending her nights work- crisis. “When I went to UVM, an off cam- ing with the disabled and elderly. After pus apartment was $300 a month,” Emily graduating in 2003, she took a data entry told me. “Now, students pay up to $750.” job at Merrill Lynch Bank in Burlington. Considering that over the same time, the with jamiebeckett Now she’s the Vice President. “Get your total out-of-state cost of UVM has gone foot in the door!” she emphasized, valuable from $27k to $45k per year, we’ve got a Mississippi – After watching Django Unchained, a Mississippi resi- by dannissim advice for students of all shapes and sizes. major problem on our hands. “UVM has dent performed some research which uncovered that after the Thir- “Let no job be beneath you!” outsourced its housing problem to Burl- teenth Amendment was originally ratified, four states remained hold- As a game developer, how do you fol- tober 2007 right after the release of Halo She’s also proved herself an adept com- ington,” she went on. “The Redstone Lofts outs. Eventually, every state ratified the amendment last of which was low up a series like Halo? With the release 3. Enter Destiny, Bungie and Activision’s munity organizer, helping found the West housed an additional 400 students. We the state of Mississippi only 148 years later, proving that they are no of Halo 4, developed by 343 Industries, 10-year commitment to a new game expe- Hill Neighborhood Association and work- needed room for 4,000.” She also wants to longer racist. the Halo franchise has sold over 46 mil- rience for the PS3, Xbox 360, and the re- ing tirelessly to bring people together. She work with UVM’s Office of Community lion games with total sales upwards of $3 cently announced PS4. Centered around wants to reduce the price of housing and Relations to expand Burlington’s student Bottled Water – I’m so glad we removed bottled water from campus; billion. Halo 4 may not have been Bungie, the gamer, Destiny promises to bring new the animosity towards students by making internships and ideally encourage more Man, this university is so green! Oh wait, you mean I can still get bot- Inc.’s creation, but the franchise that was interactions. In the ViDoc that Bungie re- on-campus life more appealing. Her ideas long-term student residency. tled water at most locations on campus, it’s just flavored? This makes their brainchild and hard work for over a leased, they show the integration of mobile include building more dorms, making Ms. Knodell has similar plans, but be- me ten thousand times more bitter than the lemon-flavored Dasani. decade is one of the best sellers ever. devices to keep the gamer engaged even UVM a wet campus, and decriminalizing lieves that more on-campus housing will Seriously guys, can we stop greenwashing the shit out of our school? Bungie started from humble begin- when AFK (away from keyboard).

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