Bro Hard or Bro Home: Bro Identity and its Implications for Young Adult Masculinity

A THESIS

Presented to

The Faculty of the Department of Sociology

The Colorado College

In Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree

Bachelor of Arts in Sociology

By

Emily R. Crouter

Spring 2012

Acknowledgements

To begin, I would like to thank Sandi Wong for the incredible guidance and support she provided to me throughout the thesis process. Thank you for taking so much time to talk to me about my project and listen to my excitements and anxieties throughout the two blocks. I would like to give a big thanks to my parents, Tod and Jan Crouter, for supporting me throughout the research and writing process, despite their confusion about the topic. To the participants, thank you very much for giving me so much time out of your busy schedules to talk about bro culture with me. Without you I would not have the sometimes hilarious and other times poignant content and anecdotes with which to fill the following pages. I would like to thank my housemates and friends Anna Serra, David

Pellett, Erika Leon, Katherine Kelley, and Meghann Maurer for their support and comic relief throughout the thesis process. Lastly, I would like to thank the library and sociology department for their continuous support not only during my thesis research, but also in my four years at Colorado College. Table of Contents Introduction………………………………………………………………………………...1 Literature Review…………………………………………………………………………..2 Gender……………………………………………………………………………...2 Structural Functionalist Perspective…………………………………….…3 Feminist and Queer Theory………………………………………………..3 Gender: What We Do……………………………………………………...4 Masculinity……………………………………..………………………………….5 Hegemonic Masculinity…………………………………………………,..6 Complicit Masculinity…………………………………………………….6 Marginalized Masculinity………………………………………………....7 Subordinated Masculinity…………………………………………………7 Masculinity in College……………………………………..……………………...8 Drinking……………………………………..…………………………….8 Hooking Up……………………………………..………………………..10 Sports……………………………………..……………………………...11 Exploring the Bro……………………………………..………………….13 Methodology……………………………………..…………………………………….…16 Analysis……………………………………..………………………………………….…18 Bro Culture as Young Adult Hegemonic Masculinity………………………....…19 Race……………………………………………………………………. 19 Class……………………………………………………………………....20 Sexual Orientation………………………………………………………..22 Headed to Wall Street…………………………………………………….23 Athletic Prowess…………………………………………………….……25 The Bonds of Brotherhood………………………………………………….…….27 Bros and Booze……………………………………………………….…..27 Women…………………………………………………………………...30 Bonding Over Sports……………………………………………………..33 Loyalty Priority System…………………………………………………………..36 Sometimes I Can’t Keep Up……………………………………………………..38 Conformity……………………………………………………………………….39 Bros Since Birth, or At Least High School……………………………...39 Unhealthy Ideals…………………………………………………………41 Emotional and Intellectual Suppression……………………………………....….43 No Emotions Allowed………………………………………………...…43 Deeper Conversations……………………………………………………44 Stereotypes and Stigmas…………………………………………………………45 There’s More to Bros than Meets the Eye……………………………….45 Bros and Women Revisited……………………………………………...47 Conclusion…………………………………………………………………………….….49 References……………………………………..…………………………………………53 Appendix……………………………………..…………………………………………..56 Interview Guide……………………………………..………………………...…56 Consent Form……………………………………..……………………………..58 Facesheet……………………………………..…………………………………………..59 Abstract

The term “bro” is an emerging label within young adult masculinity that also encompasses what is known as “bro culture.” Athletic, hard partying, and womanizing are the stereotypical characteristics that have come to describe today’s bro. This study explores the bro identity, its pressures, contradictions, and issues, along with the culture’s place in contemporary masculinity. I conducted interviews with ten young men on my own college campus whom their peers perceived to be bros. Their narratives suggest that bro culture is today’s version of young adult hegemonic masculinity. The participants’ views on what they deemed to be problematic within bro culture points to ways in which bros in a liberal arts college setting are more likely to hold progressive views about women and homosexuality. The men thus described bros and their views in diverse terms that simultaneously adhered to hegemonic masculinity while challenging its presumed uniformity.

INTRODUCTION

’Cause I’m a lax bro, eh yo I flow in my Polo, With Natty from a Solo yo, no homo I’m a lax bro; I shred threads on the reg All the hos should beg, so bitch pump my keg ’Cause I’m a lax bro.

Beer, women, homophobia, and sports. These “Midd Kid” lyrics may be creative

Middlebury students’ satirical jab at the bro identity, but the themes ring true for those familiar with the term “bro.” Bro may be a relatively new term, one that college kids explain to their parents while home on winter break, but bro is really just a stereotype or classification of young men, similar to jock, nerd, or punk. Although the definition of bro has not been widely explored compared to older slang terms used to place people within a social group, bros have begun to more clearly define themselves. Time Magazine Online featured bro culture in an article about “icing,” a game in which a player hides a Smirnoff

Ice, a sugary malt beverage, and waits for a friend to stumble upon it. When the friend discovers the Ice, he/she must get down on one knee and chug the entire contents of the much agreed upon disgusting drink. The only way the friend might deflect the Ice is if he or she is carrying a concealed Ice on their person. In which case, he or she would present the attacker with the “block” and the original “Icer” would have to get down on one knee and consume both bottles.

Time Magazine’s coverage of icing also discusses bro culture. Upper-middle class with disposable income, these young men, according to Time writer Ella Quittner, are really nothing new, as we have seen them in films such as Animal House, The Hangover, and I Love You, Man. “Frat boys, in other words,” she says. But bros are not confined to fraternity houses, though they are notorious for hanging around there. Urban Dictionary,

Crouter 1 a website where users offer their own definitions of pop-culture references, defines bros as

Obnoxious partying males who are often seen at college parties. When they aren’t making an ass of themselves they usually just stand around holding a red plastic cup waiting for something exciting to happen so they can scream something that demonstrates how much they enjoy partying. Nearly everyone in a fraternity is a bro but there are also many bros who are not in a fraternity…

Other websites are specifically dedicated to the consumption and enjoyment of bro culture including Brobible.com, Broslikethissite.com, and Statusbro.com, which was started and is headed by a Colorado College alumnus. One is hard pressed to step onto a college campus nowadays and not hear bro being thrown around. “Hey bro, what are you doing tonight?” or “He is way too bro-y for her.” Bro culture, with its drinking, sports, and womanizing might appear to be innocent, juvenile fun, but theories and research on masculinity suggest that bros deserve a hard look. Their innocent fun might conceal larger implications for adolescent and young-adult masculinity. I conducted research on bros on my own campus, whose anecdotes and opinions revealed to me the nuances within bro culture and how each of them manage the varying degrees of bro identity along with the aspects of bro culture that they find to be distasteful or problematic.

LITERATURE REVIEW Gender

To properly consider the bro, we must place him within the scope of masculinity and the even wider topic of gender. Since gender is a misunderstood word, often confused with sex, sociologists are careful to distinguish the two, positing that sex is a biological designation based simply upon body parts and functions while gender is a socially constructed phenomenon describing the social ideas of masculinity and

Crouter 2 femininity. These categories are quite powerful and inform how people genuinely feel about gender.

Structural Functionalist Perspective

Sociologists from the structural functionalist tradition tend to understand gender in terms of its function in society. For example, Talcott Parsons (1954) discusses the roles of the housewife and career man as the highest status roles for a woman and man, respectively. These sex roles, Parsons argued, are a fundamental component of the structure of the family and more broadly, of the structure of society as a whole. The feminine role is to achieve status (marriage) and then it becomes “a matter of living up to expectations and finding satisfying interests and activities” (Parsons 1954:98). The masculine role, on the other hand, is characterized by “achievement, responsibility, and authority” (Parsons 1954:99). When individuals deviate from their assigned roles,

“strain” occurs, which is considered dysfunctional for society.

Feminist and Queer Theory

Parsons and theories of structural functionalism are often criticized for assuming that if something exists in society, it must be functional. Since the 1950s feminist and queer theorists have critiqued the functionalist perspective and proposed alternative theories of gender construction. Nancy Chodorow (1974) provides a feminist psychoanalytic framework arguing that gender is a learned process, through which a child appropriately identifies with either the mother or father. She argues that gender is neither biologically determined nor due to traditional socialization practices. Instead, object- relations theory suggests that gender operates on an unconscious level.

Gender, according to Chodorow, is closely linked with the gendered division of

Crouter 3 labor and the social structure of the family. Historically, the mother has often been the primary caretaker of a household while the father was more likely to work outside the home. Given the mother’s role and presence, children initially identify with the mother.

During childhood young males and females have two separate jobs to do in order to achieve the “proper” gender. Because fathers may not be around, boys need to break their identification with their mothers and develop a positional identification that is simply not feminine, and therefore masculine. Girls, on the other hand, must break with the mother as their first love object and achieve heterosexuality. Their identification with the feminine mother, however, is not problematic. Chodorow’s idea of the family as a gender factory is radical to some, but its implications in later work on masculinity as the repudiation of the feminine is extremely relevant.

Judith Butler (1991) situates gender as a type of drag that individuals perform on a regular basis. Gender, she writes, “is a kind of imitation for which there is no original; in fact, it is a kind of imitation that produces the very notion of the original as an effect and consequence of the imitation itself” (Butler 1991:21). Gender maintenance is a compulsory and repetitive activity. If gender is drag, what people wear are simply costumes, and what people are doing is essentially performance.

Gender: What We Do

West and Zimmerman (1987) describe gender precisely as a performance. They coined the term “doing gender,” explaining that gender is an activity accomplished on a surface level. However, this activity on the surface is perceived as extremely compulsory.

One has two options: masculine or feminine. If one chooses the option that doesn’t match his/her biological parts or chooses a combination of both, one will run into problems in

Crouter 4 everyday life. Which bathroom do I use? What do I check on paperwork? Whom am I allowed to marry? Performing gender inappropriately will get a person into trouble, fast, and so most people choose (whether consciously or not) to enact masculinity or femininity correctly. Thus we “simultaneously sustain, reproduce, and render legitimate the institutional arrangements that are based on sex category” (West and Zimmerman

1987:146). Further, when nearly all people choose to perform gender correctly, gender appears to be natural and essential, as opposed to socially constructed.

Masculinity

Bros, according to public belief, are intensely concerned with performing gender correctly. Thus their behaviors and identities provide a means of understanding one way in which masculinity is performed and understood. Because all the bros I know (to my knowledge) perform gender perfectly, it is important to consider masculinity as the accomplishment of that performance. Instead of considering masculinity as a single approach to being a man, R.W. Connell (1995) suggests that masculinity “is simultaneously a place in gender relations, the practices through which men and women engage that place in gender, and the effects of these practices in bodily experience, personality, and culture” (Connell 1995:33-34). Masculinity, then, is not one particular thing, but a concept expressed through various processes. Connell’s framework of multiple masculinities, including hegemonic masculinity, complicit masculinity, subordinated masculinity, and marginalized masculinity provides a spectrum (though not perfect) in which we might place bros.

Crouter 5 Hegemonic Masculinity

Hegemonic masculinity refers to “the configuration of gender practice which embodies the currently accepted answer to the problem of the legitimacy of patriarchy, which guarantees (or is taken to guarantee) the dominant position of men and the subordination of women” (Connell 1995:38-39). Masculinity exists as it relates to the subordination of women, and the repudiation of the feminine. Hegemonic masculinity, as

Connell argues, is the “culturally exalted” (Connell 1995:38) form of masculinity at a given time and place, usually linked with institutional power as well. Connell cites corporate displays of masculinity, such as those found in business, government, and the military as examples of the relationship between the cultural ideal of hegemonic masculinity and institutions that support it. CEOs, rugged, fit celebrities, and professional athletes are the types of men one might expect to exemplify hegemonic masculinity.

Complicit Masculinity

It is ironic that a very few number of men can actually live up to the rules and expectations of hegemonic masculinity. Men who engage in complicit masculinity benefit from the patriarchy embodied by the hegemony but they are not at as much risk if hegemonic masculinity is seriously challenged. The complicit are somewhat like sheep.

They will go along with behaviors and ideas associated with hegemonic masculinity because it is easy and good for them, but they are unlikely to ever be on top themselves.

Those men who fit into the complicit masculinity category are the hardworking fathers who respect their daughters and wives but still expect dinner on the table when they get home. Or they are the college men who aren’t necessarily making the sexist jokes about women, but the ones who are laughing along just so their masculinity is not questioned.

Crouter 6 Marginalized Masculinity

Race and class are essential to the masculinity discourse. Masculinities of color and lower class masculinities will remain marginalized as long as people of color and those of lower socio-economic status continue to be undervalued. Even if black athletes are often glorified in hegemonically masculine ways, they are not the exclusive models of black masculinity, which are often made out to be extremely angry and sexually aggressive, in ways that perpetuate masculinity. Men of lower classes are also part of marginalized masculinity and stereotyped as unable to “be men” and provide for their families, roles that are seen as hegemonically masculine. Tolson (1977), for example explains that the working class masculinity is challenged by the paradox that the man is the breadwinner, yet his manual work is emasculating because he experiences alienation from the product.

Subordinated Masculinity

Sexuality is a key component of masculinity, and a topic that generates a lot of anxiety within gender relationships. Homosexuals are directly subordinated to heterosexual men. Connell puts subordinated masculinity at the very bottom of the masculine food chain. “Gayness,” writes Connell, “in patriarchal ideology, is the repository of whatever is symbolically expelled from hegemonic masculinity, the items ranging from fastidious taste in home decoration to receptive anal pleasure. Hence, from the point of view of hegemonic masculinity, gayness is easily assimilated to femininity”

(Connell 1995: 40). Again, femininity is revealed as the ultimate “don’t” within masculinity that is most valued. Subordinated masculinity, on the other hand, is likened to femininity in ways ranging from slang abuse to stereotypical feminine depictions of

Crouter 7 gayness in the media.

Hegemonic masculinity, complicit masculinity, marginalized masculinity, and subordinated masculinity. Where does the bro fall on Connell’s spectrum? One might hypothesize that he falls between complicit and hegemonic masculinity, though age and context also affect notions of masculinity and how masculinities are performed.

Masculinity in College

To be in college is often described as the best time of one’s life. Finally freed from the helicopter-parents and the responsibilities of getting into college in the first place, young men (and women) enjoy their newfound freedom in various ways. With little adult supervision aside from professors, college administration, and residential staff, many college students are very much on their own, relying on each other to lay down rules, expectations, and norms. Men and women experience college differently however, and what is remarkable is that while women believe being a woman includes a wide scope of options (Kimmel 2008) college men across the country are caught up in proving their masculinity and negotiating the definition of what it means to be a man. Regulated only by each other, masculine norms, expectations, and performances can get out of hand faster than one can say keg stand. Between the binge drinking, hooking up, obsession with sports and women, various aspects of male college culture range from the harmless to the deadly.

Drinking

Beer pong, icing, king’s cup, quarter hockey – all drinking games that are played oftentimes for the sole purpose of getting drunk. Alcohol use and abuse is not a secret on

Crouter 8 college campuses. Use however, varies across gender categories. College men tend to drink more often, consume more alcohol, and report more problems associated with their alcohol consumption in comparison to college women (Geisner and Larimer 2004).

Researchers contend that masculinity may be a driving force behind college men’s exorbitant drinking patterns. Iwamoto et al. (2011) link confirmation of masculine norms to drinking to intoxication and problems associated with consuming alcohol. They found that fraternity status is the most robust indicator of drinking to excess and problems associated with drinking. Men who reported higher perceived peer norms of drinking were more likely to drink to intoxication but not as likely to report problems associated with drinking. Moreover, Iwamoto et al. tested masculine norms to find out if they were risk factors for drinking to get drunk and/or risk factors for negative consequences of drinking. Risk factors such as being a playboy (which they define as the desire to have multiple sexual partners), winning, taking risks, and self-reliance, were all linked to either a higher risk of drinking to intoxication, problems consequent of drinking, or both.

Binge drinking in particular has a lot to do with masculinity. In his exposé

Guyland, a book on the lives of men aged 16 to 26, sociologist Michael Kimmel (2008) argues that drinking is largely about being a man and proving one’s freedom. College is the time before adulthood begins and when parents let go of the leash. “Perhaps this is why binge drinking is so attractive. It allows them to prove their manhood and hold onto their boyhood all at the same time. All the freedom and none of the responsibility”

(Kimmel 2008:109). Binge drinking also takes on the masculine quality of competition.

The four-person game of beer pong, once solely a source of college masculinity, has propelled itself to international status with the “Beer Pong World Series.”

Crouter 9 Excessive alcohol use also suits itself to a variety of male-bonding rituals such as fraternity initiations and sports team hazing. The horror stories of fraternity rituals are well known. Pledges consistently have their masculinity called into question and are forced to do dangerous and disgusting tasks. Alcohol is often the lubrication handy for such obscenities in addition to other aspects of college life. Much of what characterizes the hook up culture, for example, is fueled by copious amounts of booze.

Hooking Up

The term “hook up” is relatively new in the discourse of dating, relationships, and sex. Generally, it means a sexual encounter occurring between two parties with no indication of a future event. The appeal of the term lies in its ambiguity. Tom and

Katherine hooked up. What does that mean? Did they have sex? Pet heavily? Or just kiss for a while? Using the term “hook up” is appealing because full disclosure is not required. In her book Hooking Up, Kathleen A. Bogle (2008) postulates that the term is beneficial for both men and women because it allows men to feign that something more happened and for women to protect their reputations if they want to give the impression that less occurred.

In interviews with 76 college and graduate students, Bogle discovered that despite the apparent “free love” attitude of the hookup culture, the traditional sexual double standard still exists for women. The hookup culture plays a definitive role in college masculinity because men most often benefit from the hookup culture. Women have to engage in the hookup world following the men’s rules, according to Kimmel in

Guyland. “It’s the only game in town,” writes Kimmel, “If they [women] want to have sexual relationships with men – and by all appearances they certainly do – then this is the

Crouter 10 field on which they must play” (Kimmel 2008: 202). Men score masculinity points, and

Kimmel guesses that hooking up is less about the women and more about the recap with the boys the next day. After conversations with almost 400 young men Kimmel assents that “guys hook up to prove something to other guys. The actual experience of sex pales in comparison to the experience of talking about sex” (Kimmel 2008: 206).

In contrast, women clearly do not benefit much from the goals of increased masculine ego within the hookup culture. Bogle cites that many women hope that a hookup will lead to something more, while many men are looking to hook up more casually and with a greater number of partners. Male loyalty is also a factor in the hookup culture. “Bros before hos” is often the resounding slogan involved in the male attitude toward the hookup culture on college campuses. Because the hookup culture provides a source of masculine expressive identity, we would expect its values to be part of bro culture.

Sports

Playing sports, watching sports, and talking about sports are important aspects of the college masculine arena. Whitson (1990) locates sport within hegemonic masculinity, arguing that the values and practices behind sport support its domination and reverence.

“In contemporary Western culture, arguably, sports (and especially confrontational team games) ritualize aggression and allow it to be linked with competitive achievement and, in turn, with masculinity (Whitson 1990:28). Connell (1995) argues in Masculinities that sport is indeed the embodiment of hegemonic masculinity. Violence, winning, strength, and skill are each valued in sport and also within hegemonic masculinity. Additionally, sports offer a convenient arena in which to repudiate the feminine and subordinate

Crouter 11 homosexuality (Connell [1987] 2002; Schacht 1996; Swain 2000).

Specifically in college masculinity, the role of sports appears to be particularly important. In a British study of 24 male college students, researcher Steve Dempster

(2008) found that participants emphasized the importance of sports in communicating and framing hegemonic masculinity among their friends. Membership in a sports team is also linked with heavy drinking and initiation rites, closely resembling fraternity behavior in addition to “getting women.”

Kimmel (2008) notes that even if you’re not a college athlete, talking about sports, watching sports, and even activities such as Fantasy Football, are other vital aspects of college masculinity. He theorizes that sports are a safe way for men to express feelings without necessarily talking about feelings. When the team wins or loses, intense expressions of happiness or sadness are appropriate and even expected. However within many arenas outside of sports, emotional expression is deemed feminine and unacceptable. Sports then, may be an emotional outlet for men to bond and express feeling.

Looking around a college campus, one will surely see young men sporting professional or collegiate athletic wear to express devotion to the team. And when the game is on, the beer flows. I spotted a young man from my college wearing a tank top proclaiming, “Win or lose, we still booze” at a recent hockey game. Alcohol and sports seem to go hand in hand in college – a notion that is reinforced by events such as the

Super Bowl, in which beer commercials typically make fun of a non-hegemonically masculine victim.

Crouter 12 Exploring the Bro

Where does the bro fit into the discussion of college masculinity? The category of

“bro” is of course an imperfect stereotype of a young man. Much of what makes a bro a bro is how others perceive him. George Herbert Mead’s (1934) notions of the I, the Self, and the Me are helpful in imagining how people conceptualize themselves and also their presentation to others. The concept of the self is only possible through recognition of the other. Mead describes the self as a subject-object, whereas the I is a subject and the me an object. The I and the me constitute the self. One’s own conception of self in society is important in identity formation. Thinking of the bro as both a potential personal identity and perception of a person is a necessary duality. One might consider himself a bro, while others do not, or perhaps more likely, one might not want to be labeled a bro, but others choose to identify him as such.

One’s perception of self is heavily influenced by the culture and social circumstances in which they grow up and are accustomed. Bourdieu’s (1980) notion of habitus is particularly useful in considering the bro as part of a specific social group.

Habitus is described as the taken for granted socially learned activities, dispositions, and tastes acquired by individuals dependent on their social circumstances.

Bro self-identification is becoming increasingly common and popular.

Brobible.com and broslikethissite.com are both websites that play on the bro identity and have helped propel it into an actual culture. Bro culture is difficult to define, but many of its roots lie in lacrosse and more broadly east coast prep school culture. “Lax bro” is becoming a common term, a subcategory of bro. As the “Midd Kid” lyrics continue, the links between lax bros and east coast prep school culture become clear.

Crouter 13 R.L. Brooks, Dave Matthews tees Mickey D's, double cheese man I'm smashin' these My polo shirt I un-tuck it, playin' ruit I rain buckets If I ain't rippin' twine then I'm sailin' to Nantucket ‘Cause I'm a lax bro, bitch…

Lax bros, as evident from Midd Kid lyrics, are deeply connected with upper class culture.

“R.L.” and “Brooks” connate preppy, expensive clothing brands Ralph Lauren and

Brooks Brothers, respectively. “Ruit” is short for Beirut, a type of beer pong. “Ripping twine” refers to playing lacrosse and of course when the lax bro isn’t laxing he’s sailing to Nantucket. The aforementioned websites Broslikethissite, and Brobible all lean heavily on the lax bro stereotype, supporting its potential dominance. For example, one of my participants asked if I was planning on interviewing any lax bros, to which I replied that I already had. “Oh,” he said laughing, “I don’t know if I’ll be able to live up to that level of bro.” The lax bro may be the highest level of bro also because it is a traditionally white, affluent group.

Bros, however come in all shapes and sizes. My next-door neighbros (not a typo) live in what they call the “Playbro Mansion,” and are considered bros by much of the campus. That particular peer group is known as bro-y not for being on the lacrosse team, but for hosting many campus parties and spending a lot of time at the gym. One must not forget the frat bro, perhaps one of the original stereotypes that helped spawn the slang term bro in the first place, considering that fraternity members are “brothers” and the shortened version of the word is, of course, bro.

Ultimately, defining bro and bro culture is difficult and problematic. Because it is largely a stereotype many young men would like to steer clear of that identification for themselves. On the other hand, bro culture is getting national attention from news sources

Crouter 14 such as Time Magazine Online and The New York Times. While there is not a formal definition of “bro” various definitions come close to matching the accepted definition at the college where I am conducting research on bro culture. To restate the

Urbandictionary.com definition, a bro is

Obnoxious partying males who are often seen at college parties. When they aren’t making an ass of themselves they usually just stand around holding a red plastic cup waiting for something exciting to happen so they can scream something that demonstrates how much they enjoy partying. Nearly everyone in a fraternity is a bro but there are also many bros who are not in a fraternity…

The blog titled “I’d rather be a bro” gives the bro more credit than Urbandictionary.com.

The blogger writes,

I’m going to start by saying that it’s almost impossible to DEFINE a bro. It’s a fluid term, and to put verbal confines on it would be stereotyping. But to generalize, a bro is someone (male OR female) who embodies the spirit of forever young, beer, tanks, summer, college, fraternities, swag, sports, and strong opinions. Keep in mind not all bros exhibit all these qualities. You don’t need to be in a frat to be a bro. It’s someone who is awesome at being them…People pretending to be bros aren’t bros. It’s gotta be organic, it has to be natural. Pretending pushes over the line and crosses into douche territory (code red BAD). It’s about being confident, and maybe a little cocky, without being obnoxious. It’s about loyalty, to yourself and others that you respect. A bro may not respect everyone …but to those they do respect, they stay loyal, and they put up a fight. Lastly, bros work hard and play hard. They might work hard at sports, looking good, making money, getting grades, or being involved. But no matter what, they will party harder than you. Because they have deserved it.

In addition to the internet musings of bro culture, Michael Kimmel’s description of young men aged 16 to 26 offers a more solid sociological perspective on the possibility of a bro definition, though he doesn’t ever use the term bro, except when he explains the “bros before hos” mentality. Kimmel describes a middle class male in college, who relies on his peers’ enactments of masculinity to guide his own actions. Heavy alcohol use, misogyny, and sports play a central in Kimmel’s “guy” living in what he terms “Guyland.”

Given the available definitions based off of the online bro culture and broader

Crouter 15 literature of college masculinity, I offer a definition of a bro for the purposes of this study. A bro refers to a young man, likely middle-upper class, in college, who subscribes to a culture of drinking, belittling women, and sports. The bro is loyal to a male peer group, whether a fraternity, sports team, or more informal friend circle. A bro for the purposes of this study may either self-identify as such or be perceived as a bro by others.

There is something more going on with bros beyond the red solo cups, lax pinnies, and CEO and Secretary Ho parties. The hard partying, bizarre initiation rites, and groupthink attitudes point to something unique occurring within masculinity. Nowhere in the formal literature does anyone mention these “bros.” Kimmel hints at them, but is more concerned with young adult masculinity on a larger scope, exploring a broader range of types of young men. Bro culture is a relatively unexplored niche within masculinity, and the study of it may reveal some important implications within gender research, especially in light of the time in which the culture emerges. From what we know about bro culture, the bros themselves present it as “the life.” They party hard, score women, and generally just “bro out.” But do these activities come at any cost? Are there any underlying risks or contradictions behind being a bro? To answer this question I went straight to the source – bros on my own campus. What, precisely, is the bro identity and how do bros perceive and manage any risks, hardships, and pressures associated with being bros?

METHODOLOGY

In order to learn more about the bro identity, I wanted to gain access to men on campus who people consider bros. After sending an email to my sorority, I contacted the names of several people they recommended to me as bros and contacted them via email

Crouter 16 or Facebook asking if they would be willing to be interviewed for a thesis about bro culture in exchange for a ten dollar gift certificate to Phantom Canyon, a restaurant- brewery frequented by students. While not all of the participants self-identified as bros, all of them at least partially identified with bro culture. Through the participants I was able to use snowball sampling to get names of more potential participants.

I eventually interviewed ten participants, nine who were currently enrolled at

Colorado College and one graduate of the school. I spoke with two first-years, two sophomores, two juniors, three seniors, and one graduate from the class of 2010. Every single male was heterosexual and white. Eight of them said that they self-identified with bro culture, and the other two stated that they self-identify with parts of bro culture. Six of the ten participants said they considered themselves to be bros, three did not self- identify as bros, and one partially identified himself as a bro. Four of the participants are from the east coast, two hail from the Midwest, one is from Colorado, and the last from the South.

Interviews were conducted in both the student center in private rooms and the library in private rooms and were recorded with a digital recorder and uploaded to a personal computer. I interviewed the sole graduate via Skype. The interviews lasted from forty minutes to an hour and a half. I began each interview asking the participants to sign consent forms and to fill out face-sheets with information about their hometown, major, and other bits of information. The interviews started with general questions about bro culture and segued into deeper questions about potential dislikes, pressures, and harms of the culture. The original interview guide contained 55 questions, but I added and subtracted questions depending on what the participant had already discussed. A

Crouter 17 complete interview schedule can be found in the Appendix.

It should be noted that the college in which I conducted my research is a small, private, liberal arts school that leans politically left. Many of the participants cited these characteristics when they stated that Colorado College (CC) might not necessarily be the gold standard in bro. One could expect that the general political views of the sample on issues such as feminism, homosexuality, and race might be different than bros who attend a southern state school, for example. The school is also primarily composed of white, upper-middle class students, which is somewhat representative in my sample, however a larger project would benefit from interviews with a variety of bros from many different backgrounds. Because of time constraints, I targeted participants whom people thought were bros or who would be able to knowledgably speak about the culture. Surprisingly out of the twelve people I contacted, ten were eager and willing to talk to me about bro culture. Much of what they told me was extremely humorous, other parts enlightening, and some things simply sad.

ANALYSIS

My participants were very open and honest about their perceptions of bro culture.

Their ideas about bro identity and subsequent issues suggest that bro identity aligns smoothly with hegemonic masculinity. Through the mediums of drinking, women, and athletics, bros form meaningful and lasting bonds. Out of those connections and bonds the participants discussed subsequent loyalties to fellow bros. Additionally, the participants offered many critiques of bro culture. Among their issues with bro identity were excessive drinking, misogyny, homophobia, lack of emotional support, conformity to the culture, and simply some of the unfair stereotypes attached to being a bro. The

Crouter 18 combination of the diversity the interviewees ascribed to bro identity along with their perceptions of what they felt was problematic about the culture posits that the stereotype of the bro and thus perhaps hegemonic masculinity itself is more fluid than previously imagined.

Bro Culture as Young Adult Hegemonic Masculinity

After considering the demographics of my participants and listening to them describe their perceptions of bro culture, it appears that the bro aligns with Connell’s

(1995) notion of hegemonic masculinity. Although the participants did not state it directly, their definitions of bro suggest that bro culture is the college male’s answer to hegemonic masculinity.

Race

Each of my participants, by all appearances, was Caucasian. I could have sought out bros of color, but I interviewed the young men recommended to me, and they all happened to be white, which is telling of how bros are perceived. Only two of the participants spoke about race in their definitions of a bro. At the time of the interview

Barrett, a freshman, was enrolled in a sociology class called Racial Inequality, so perhaps that knowledge contributed to his awareness of bro as a white identity. When asked to state his best definition of a bro, the first thing he said was “white.” Later, at the end of the interview he mused,

I always knew it, but it’s such a white thing. It’s such a white thing; it’s definitely a white thing. Especially when it gets involved – because bro is definitely a preppy thing. And with preppiness comes wealth, and with that wealth, I know we’ve talked about it, comes white. Because the accumulation of wealth started a long time ago. And that’s something that blacks have been disadvantaged – the past hundred, over a hundred years.

Crouter 19 Lawson, the other participant who cited whiteness as a bro characteristic, simply stated it as an afterthought saying, “I should include this - they tend to be rich, white kids.” Bro identity then, is situated to oppose any type of marginalized masculinity. Certainly there must be African American and other bros of color, but as the interviewees stated, the norm is white.

Class

As Barrett pointed out, whiteness and wealth are closely linked in American history. Along with whiteness as a norm in bro culture, there is an enormous and obvious link to class, especially upper-middle class. Six of my participants attended private high schools, and I can guess that the remaining four public high schools are quite good. For example, Rob from Chicago attended New Trier, a public high school famous for its affluence and academics. “You could do a whole thesis on New Trier,” he told me after his interview.

Many of the participants related bro culture back to the east coast prep school culture. Lacrosse was cited several times as the sort of “classic bro” model. Lacrosse is a well-known prep school sport and, as Jimmy pointed out, it’s not cheap.

I feel like the term bro comes from lax bro, honestly. I played lacrosse from the age of seven up until senior in high school and that was like my main sport, so I can’t really speak for other sports, but I don’t know, going back to the money thing. Playing lacrosse is super expensive. You have to buy the pads and the stick, and the nice head, and the nice stringing on the head, and you add it up and it can be like a thousand dollars for all your equipment.

The boys mentioned lacrosse and preppy clothing styles in their definitions of bros as well. From boat shoes to lacrosse-style socks that come up mid-calf, preppy style, lacrosse, and wealth are jumbled together to create bro style. As Barrett, a freshman, put it, bros tend to be

Crouter 20 from kind of a good, like a wealthy background in a sense. You know not always, but I think then beyond that it comes down to not only lifestyle but in a lot of senses the way you dress. People might go, ‘oh there’s a guy wearing a snapback, flat brim backwards, he’s got long hair, he’s got the flow, he’s got his lax stick and he’s just hanging out.

Many of the men mentioned polo shirts and pastel shorts, and one cited expensive outdoor-wear, “fratagonia,” a play on the company Patagonia. Love for the outdoors, especially expensive outdoor activities were among some of the bro activities besides lacrosse that the participants discussed. Many of them spoke about bros enjoying an active outdoorsy lifestyle full of skiing, hiking, camping, and fishing, each of which tend to be fairly white and quite expensive in terms of the equipment required. Jimmy, a junior who grew up in Manhattan, said that skiing, especially skiing at Vail, a resort well-known for its ritzy atmosphere, is a particularly bro-y activity.

The participants did however describe bros aside from the lax type. One self- identified bro, Max, cited the lax bro stereotype but then told me that beyond that there is a bro for any type of sport, and that the variety is so vast that it “gets confusing.” Max considers himself a “baseball bro” and also lives in a house with three young men considered “Jewish bros” on campus. Bro, then, can surely go beyond the prep school, lacrosse mold.

The interviewees discussed a particular habitus (Bourdieu 1980) that included private schools, lacrosse equipment, and ski trips, thus the typical bros my participants described clearly adhere to an upper-middle class lifestyle at the very least. Along with race, class is a strong indication of bro-ness. Marginalized masculinities do not seem to mesh with bro identity, and neither do subordinated ones, according to my interviewees.

Crouter 21 Sexual Orientation

“Obviously being gay and being a bro would be something you would never really see,” Barrett told me. “It doesn’t happen…um, just the fact that a gay bro? You wouldn’t really see that, I guess.” It comes as no shock that bro culture is centered around heteronormative ideals. With the emphasis on sports, women, and aggressive drinking that is later discussed, correct enactment of masculinity is core to bro culture, which does not leave room for fluid views of sexuality. Barrett suggested that gay people would not be likely to hold similar interests as bros as a potential reason for the lack of gay bros.

“But especially when you’re sitting there, talking about the things we do, I don’t see how a gay person would enjoy – we’re talking about girls, we’re talking about porn, we’re talking about I don’t know, definitely masculine things.”

The participants discussed homosexuality and heterosexuality in response to the question, “Do you think bros have particular attitudes toward heterosexuality or homosexuality?” Every single interviewee espoused somewhat tolerant and progressive views about homosexuality, which was to be expected in light of the prevalent political views on campus. Many of them complained about the homophobic slurs sometimes flung around by bros. Others, like Cameron, a senior, reiterated what CJ Pascoe (2008) found in her research on high school boys and their homophobic slurs – that “gay” or

“fag” doesn’t necessarily translate to homosexual, but that those slurs are a way that males regulate masculinity.

I’ve never met a bro who was legitimately homophobic, whereas – I’ve met bros who use gay in a derogatory way, but they’re never referring to something as homosexual, they just grew up in a high school or something which their society used gay to mean stupid or I don’t know, annoying.

As Bodey pointed out however, “even here [at Colorado College] you still get kids saying

Crouter 22 horribly bigoted words, you know. I’ve heard faggot way too many times, and that’s one of those things. You really hate to see such a smart group of individuals being so ignorant.” Others beside Bodey recognized the larger implications of using homophobic slurs. Even while the interviewees spoke liberally and progressively about homosexuality, only one of them discussed the possibility of there existing a gay bro, while the others did not mention it or stated, like Barrett, that they couldn’t really imagine it. Thus bro identity is placed in opposition to marginalized masculinity in terms of race and class and additionally subordinated masculinity. The boys’ own open opinions of homosexuality, however, suggest that while heterosexuality is the accepted norm in bro culture, there exists a range of views personal to individual bros that do not match the seemingly traditional take on sexual orientation.

Headed to Wall Street

Another component of hegemonic masculinity beyond race, class, and heteronormativity is power and prestige. As Connell (1987) suggested, CEOs, presidents, and officers exemplify the hegemonically masculine career path, and as it turns out, bros fall into these professions as well. As my participants told me, bros become pros, and they do this (apparently) by choosing to major in subjects such as economics and business. Overwhelmingly the participants said they expected to find economics and business departments overrun with bros. When I probed Harry on why he anticipated bros to major in economics he replied,

Because of the kind of, unspoken consequences that are saying if you major in econ, you’ll have a better chance of making money, I guess is kind of the driving thought behind it. You do economics because you want to graduate to – I think the bro culture of professional life is probably finance. Young pros in finance in New York, that’s kind of what I see bros graduating onto in their minds.

Crouter 23 On a similar note, the sole graduate I interviewed told me that the founders of the aforementioned Brobible.com “are the epitome of post-college New York bros. They’re like well dressed, young, date hot girls, have a lot of money, date hot girls, party hard.”

Rob also cited the bros in high-powered places, as a motivation behind their academic success. “That stereotype of that east coast bro-y prep school type kid,” he said, again linking prep school culture to bro culture, “ is gonna be having typically that idea of you know, maybe like a wall street job or something.”

Some of my participants went as far as to link the bro’s choice of major to traditional gender roles. “I think a lot of guys have a different perspective on what they want to do with their futures,” said Barrett.

But I think a lot of it has involved business oriented, when it comes to occupation. For the future, marrying and having a family. Like that basic kind of –it’s still not an easy thing to do, like even in America. One in five people are getting divorced And so that’s not part of the plan. You know, people want to get married and have a great relationship and live that white suburban life, in a lot of ways.

The field of business is attractive, according to Barrett, because it provides a way for bros to make their own money. “You gotta start your own job, the man’s going to make the money. The man is like the breadwinner. The man is the guy who is going to run the house, and then you’re going to marry a wife who’s going to take care of your children.”

Occupationally, the boys described bros as fulfilling an additional requisite of hegemonic masculinity – the successful, high powered job to eventually support a family.

Even though each interviewee espoused the stereotype of the hegemonically masculine finance-career-man, others offered some variation of that particular norm. For example, Bodey told me he would expect most bros to grow up to manage hedge funds, but then added, “and then I think you’ll get people who do some really interesting things,

Crouter 24 some really helpful things. Whether it’s dealing with nonprofits, more environmentally friendly business. I think there’s sort of hope there, there’s a lot of things that can be done.” Bros making a difference! Bodey’s thought that bros will wind up doing some humanitarian or environmentally friendly work is a variation from the Wall Street banker; however, the narrative still presumes that the bros will be “dealing with” those fields, which takes on the presumption of running or heading companies, an ideal that is still classically hegemonically masculine. Ideas such as Bodey’s reinforce that bro identity is hegemonic masculinity, but also convey that there exist some unexpected nuances within it.

Athletic Prowess

A last facet of hegemonic masculinity seamlessly related to bro culture is athletic ability. Sports were something that every interviewee deemed central to bro culture, and many of them discussed the role of personal athletic ability as a part of the bro identity.

Aside from the fact that every single participant mentioned college lacrosse athletes as a typical form of bro, many cited intramural sports and pickup games of basketball as particularly important to bro culture, because they provide a way to assert athletic prowess without the pressures of official collegiate sports.

“I feel like our house kind of lives for intramurals,” Max, a senior, told me.

“There was a day third block, when we won IM soccer, IM football, and IM dodge ball.

Same day. And that was the most epic day we’ve ever had.” Bodey spoke to the competitive nature of intramural sports on campus among bros saying “IM sports - bros love IM sports. I mean it’s their favorite thing. Because everyone likes to think that they’re a great athlete and they want to dabble in every sport and say I’m just as good at

Crouter 25 flag football as I am at inner tube water polo, and I’ve won – here’s my t-shirt, my face is up on the wall. So I think that it’s definitely for the glory.”

Many of the participants drew upon the bro love of an active lifestyle. Games of pickup basketball, in addition to weekends of skiing were mentioned by more than one interviewee. In addition to being active, some of the men discussed bros’ interest and appreciation of team contact sports, which relates back to the classic bro sport of lacrosse.

Tyler, a sophomore, said that contact sports are important to bros because they are

“considered manly, and it’s pretty rough, so you can like fuck other people up on the lacrosse field, and football. So it has that aggressive aspect to it.” Similarly, Cameron cited the “physical stakes” involved in contact sports that appeal to bros.

Sporting your winning intramural t-shirt, participating in casual games of basketball, and respecting hard-hitting sports are bro activities directly linked to hegemonic masculinity’s glorification of athletic ability. Through that athletic medium, and also through the bro’s white, upper-middle class, heterosexual, Wall Street-aspiring identity outlined by my participants, bro culture presents itself as the college male’s answer to hegemonic masculinity. What is particularly notable is that while bro culture exemplifies and fits hegemonic masculinity, the range of possibilities for bro identity appears to be rather vast. Whether one is a lax bro or a Jewish bro, whether he grows up to work on Wall Street or to found a non-profit, the bro cannot be put into a box. Thus the bro both adheres to and defies Connell’s conception of hegemonic masculinity because he simultaneously upholds the hegemony while proving it to be less of a straightjacket then previously conceived.

Crouter 26 The Bonds of the Brotherhood

If bros are the kids on campus subscribing to and enacting hegemonic masculinity fairly well, they are bound to get together and become friends. Whether through sports teams or common interests and backgrounds, one would expect bros to bond over their similarities with one another. The participants spoke often and in heartfelt tones about the connections bros share with one another. Certain topics and activities emerged as “pillars of the bro coliseum,” as one participant eloquently put it. Not surprisingly and in line with the literature, drinking, sports, and women surfaced as three major cornerstones of bro culture in terms of activities to bond over, and perhaps more importantly, conversations to bond over. What I discovered is that oftentimes the discussion of the act is what creates the bond rather than the act itself.

Bros and Booze

“To get fucked up,” was one of the more common answers when I asked my interviewees why bros drink. Built into the very definition of bro-ness is the participation in drinking and partying. And the kind of drinking bros do is not casual. “It’s way too aggressive,” said Max. One of his friend group’s favorite pastimes is cheering on the college men’s basketball team while drinking excessive amounts of alcohol. “We love going to CC basketball games, and we can’t go there sober. Every time there’s a CC basketball game, we know it’s going to be a black out or almost black out night. Every person will fill a Nalgene up with this much vodka [he indicates16 ounces on my water bottle] and we just pound it in like five minutes.” For sixteen ounces of hard liquor, that would mean that Max would expect his friends to drink ten and two thirds shots worth of alcohol for their basketball outings.

Crouter 27 “Ripping shots is fun; I have a really good time doing that. I think it’s a really good bonding experience,” Cameron told me. Additionally, he said that “Drinking together is a good bonding activity, where you get to learn more about somebody through hanging out with them more and seeing what they’re like in different states of mind. You get to learn more about people that way.” Barrett also cited drinking as a shared bond among his high school bro friends. “I think it’s a big part [of bro culture] because when you drink with someone like that, it’s another kind of connection. Like not only do we play sports together, but we hang out on the weekends, we drink together, we’re partying together. That’s just another connection that keeps us close.” Communing together in altered states of mind as a bonding experience was mentioned by other participants, but apart from actually being very intoxicated with each other, there is the act of discussing just how drunk everybody was.

Tony’s is a bar that was frequented by the class of 2010. “The day we went to

Tony’s for nine hours,” reminisced Lawson, the CC graduate who graciously agreed to a

Skype interview. “It’s not just the story you win from it, you have a great time and everything, but when something becomes legendary like that, that’s what you’re shooting for – that’s what you should be shooting for.” Tony’s can be a fun place to sip a beer, granted, but for nine hours? That is the perfect example of “doing it for the story. Three of my participants mentioned the bro phrase “Do it for the story,” which exemplifies the purpose of excessive bro drinking habits. Not only can one have a fun time drunkenly bonding with the bros, but one gets the added bonus of being able to bond over it every time it is discussed and relived. And of course, the things that will be discussed most are the instances that make for the best stories.

Crouter 28 “Doing it for the story,” is thus a motto for pushing things to the ridiculous, because it creates connections between bros. Harry confessed that he thinks “a lot of things that bros do – part of the reason why they do them is to be able to say that they did it, more of an experience thing, a story thing, than actually being interested in living some of the crazy ideas, although that’s not always true but, a lot of it’s ‘yeah, yeah, remember last week when we…?’ – kind of adding credibility.” He added, “If you’re drinking – again it goes back to the thing that if you know, doing it because you could say you did it.

Because when you’re drunk, you wake up the next morning and hear the stories, and like, you talk with your friends [about] what happened, and what a crazy night, and that’s always pretty fun.” Likewise, Jimmy said candidly and honestly, “as long as you and all of your friends are really hammered and can talk the next day and play some video games about how hammered you were last night, and don’t remember what happened, that’s a good bond. Talking about drinking, drinking, and being drunk, are a huge part of it I’d say.”

Doing it for the story is as Lawson put it is to “do everything to the extreme, to the ridiculous almost. And you’re taking opportunities to do things that would make a good story.” Lawson has made a business out of the motto, as a founder of

Statusbro.com, which sells stickers with the saying as well as other bro-themed t-shirts and coozies. Max’s ten shot basketball ordeals might be pushing things “to the ridiculous,” but doing it for the story is better illustrated in his house’s creation and hosting of the Brolympics.

Every few months or so, we have Brolympics…It started last year when we were juniors and it consists of – you’ve got teams of two. And the events vary every time we do it, but the main ones are usually beer pong, boat race, like a team chug thing, and uh, you know Mario Cart [the video game]? So drunk driving, you

Crouter 29 have to finish your beer before you finish your lap. Flip cup, full house, stuff like that. And so you’re paired up with one other person and you guys pick a country you want to be, and play until we crown a champion. And that’s usually bad. Those are always messy nights. We did it Saturday, and it starts early afternoon usually. I blacked out really hard, it was bad. Probably like the top three hangovers of my life the next day.

A play on sports, competition, and drinking with the word bro in its title? Even if Max cannot remember all of the events of the Brolympics, he can at least discuss and bond over the fact that he cannot remember all of the events of the Brolympics. Ironically, bros are forgetting things in order to make memories.

Women

Just when I thought that the Brolympics could not get any bro-ier, Max added the real punch line. In addition to the masculine traits of drinking and competition, the

Brolympics included the objectifying women. “When we were doing Brolympics last weekend, it was the first time we didn’t do countries as teams, we did porn star names, actual people. So a lot of guys had their favorite female porn star.”

No doubt are individual bros, as most of them identify as heterosexual, interested in women, but females serve a larger purpose in bro culture. Women give bros something to brag about, complain about, and bond over. All of my participants discussed the hookup culture on campus and described how bros navigate it. Jimmy, who had just broken up with his girlfriend of three years from high school told me he was never involved in the hookup component of bro culture for that reason, and now he is being forced to come to terms with it.

Yeah, it’s kind of blowing my mind, already. I’m not into it. Talking to my friends, who are bros and single, they are always out prowling and then they talk about girls and how the sex was and how they’re not going to text them – or their excuse for not texting them, you know. Like if the girl gets mad at them, they tell me all these excuses why it’s not their fault, where I think if you sleep with someone it’s a very serious thing, you should definitely follow up with them.

Crouter 30

Barrett also relayed the bro attitude of blowing off women and talking about it to other bros. “It’s a disrespectful thing and not only that but like, ‘oh yeah, I hooked up with her, she’s texting me, but I’m just gonna ignore her. I do not want to talk to her right now.’

Certain things like that. Just disrespect, there’s definitely disrespect.” Many of my participants discussed chauvinism and objectification of women in their narratives. It was something they seemed to be quite aware of, however they may have been emphasizing that because they were being interviewed by a woman. The participants’ views of women and misogyny will be discussed in later.

Talking about women is easily a bonding activity when the topic is funny, whether it is sexist or not, though Bodey believes that degradation of women is not that bad on our particular campus. “I think on the outside on bro culture, it’s supposed to be a slightly degrading to women, not terribly at CC, but kind of it’s funny to joke about that for bros. And then it’s also a more sexualized view, as opposed to something deeper.”

Tyler, on the other hand, first handedly witnessed blatant sexism on campus when one of his friends didn’t get his way one evening.

One night at the beginning of the year – he’s a bro, definitely, he doesn’t play a sport here, but he did in high school and he’s definitely still a bro. There was this freshman girl at the beginning of the year who was flirting with him, I mean all signs pointed that she wanted to hook up with him and then – she’s a freshman, it’s the first week of school, and so she probably just wanted to flirt with a lot of guys and have fun and whatever. And so when she started flirting with someone else, he got her number and texted her that she was a slut.

Though Tyler did not discuss it, apart from failing to hook up with this freshman, his friend also lost the opportunity to talk about it with his friends. On the flip side, however, some of the participants told me that there are some cases in which bros choose to not tell their friends about particular hookups they were not proud of. Bodey described two

Crouter 31 options for the bro who hooks up with someone who would not be seen in a favorable light. “And then there’s the classic, this girl was not for whatever reason, was not approved by the bros. And so there are two routes, either ‘I was so blackout dude, I don’t even remember, she raped me ordeal.’ Or there can be ‘blah, blah, this or that, I was so blackout.’ Or there’s just not telling them. Just holding off on it, and sort of denying it, or really trying not to think about it.” It would seem then, that bros strive to discuss women that will elicit a positive reaction from their friends, a reaction that is normally defined by the attractiveness of the woman. Barrett saw the social unfairness of this, and said, “it’s something in our society that isn’t fair and very judgmental, but if a girl is very unattractive and walking to a party or something, a lot of bros would be like dude did you see that chick? And I’ll be like – I’m a little different. I’m kind of a bro, but never really involved in some of the extreme stuff. But that definitely happens.” Similarly to Bodey, who suggested that CC is not “terribly degrading” to women, Barrett distanced himself from some of the “extreme” views in bro culture, which points to the reality that many bros recognize misogyny within bro culture and actively want to dissociate themselves from it.

The participants did however, note the importance of bro discussions of women, which they described as oftentimes objectifying and misogynistic. There may be some work involved in reconciling a positive bro identity with some unfortunate aspects of it that the participants find problematic. All the same, talking about women and especially those who score with the other bros is a bonding point, and one that fits in nicely with drinking because much of the hookup culture takes place within the context of drinking.

Similarly, sports become an additional pillar of the bro coliseum because it seamlessly

Crouter 32 provides another topic over which bros can discuss scoring.

Bonding over Sports

Sports are the classic way in which bros bond. Because so much of bro culture is related to one’s current or prior membership on a sports team, it comes as no shock that both talking about sports and playing sports builds connections between bros. The participants spoke fondly of their experiences on teams, sometimes in very emotional ways, affirming what Kimmel (2008) suggested in sports as a safe space for men to assert feelings. “The team sports because it’s that culture, it originates from playing those sports, idolizing that group of men who have that bond, who go out to war every week, every day together. There’s something that – most people want to be a part of a group.

People like to feel involved, feel connected, I think. And that’s what a team is, it’s the ultimate connection,” said Bodey.

The time commitment involved in sports is another aspect of why bros bond over sports. After Jimmy told me, “I think that playing sports in high school teaches you to be a bro mainly because it keeps you in shape, it makes this really tight bond with all these guys,” I asked him to tell me about the bond he experienced playing lacrosse.

Yeah. Um, all my best friends from high school were on the lacrosse team. They’re all going to Ultra [an electronic music festival] with me; it’s going to be fun. I don’t know like, growing up with New York City, we would all go to practice, we’d all hang out afterwards, and when parents were gone we’d all party together, and throw parties. And we would all go on this spring break trip to Florida to play lacrosse every spring break, where we would like live together, so that really connected us. I don’t think it’s unique to lacrosse, in any team sport you get that tight bond with that teammates.

Working hard together, in addition to time commitment is something Barrett spoke about in a particularly touching way. He told me that sports is where he made his real connections in high school.

Crouter 33 And it kind of is everything that involves the bro mentality. Work hard, play hard. You’re going bust your ass in the off season, like we really, especially for me and my friends, we definitely had a spirit, where it was like you know what, we took lacrosse very seriously…it’s like a special thing that no one else can have. That no one else can be involved in. It’s just us, the sport, and us like working our asses off. And it’s something that really connects people. Especially if you’re considered a bro, you’re all together. I think that sports bring a lot of friends together, obviously, but in the bro culture especially as well…You’ve been working hard, and afterwards, it’s like you’ve just – like after a victory, you and all your bros and you’ve just accomplished something. And it’s something you can’t get any other way, and that’s just a different kind of connection…this is like something we’re working for together as a team, we’re doing this. And that just brings us closer.

Not surprisingly, many of my participants likened bro friendship groups to teams, whether on or off the field. Supportive members, a group mentality, and competition all contribute to Lawson’s conception of bro bonds as a team or brotherhood.

I didn’t play any sports, and most of my friends at CC didn’t, but we all played sports in high school or something. And that’s really part of like where people learn this whole brotherhood thing. You’re part of a tight-knit group of males and that’s just like being on a team, even if you’re not anymore. Once people don’t play sports in college, maybe they associate with wanting to be that team mentality. Because I’d definitely say a group of friends, of bros is much like a team, everyone has each other’s backs. You just don’t have to run.

The team mentality and subsequent support are attributes that lend themselves to forming friendships and lasting bonds.

Beyond playing sports, being able to talk about sports with the boys is of importance in bro culture. Many of the participants noted that “talking shit” about professional sports teams, or, as Rob put it more delicately, “I’m from Chicago. So when the Bulls play the Celtics, there’s going to be some chatter going on…your hometown teams are a pretty big deal. And that’s kind of one of the bigger, more common bro conversations – is ‘okay, my team is playing your team this weekend, what’s up?’ Rob later added, “Watching or just following sporting events is pretty big. If you don’t know

Crouter 34 what happened in the big game last night, then you’re out of the loop.”

Finally, watching sports is another bonding activity for strengthening friendships.

Perhaps because I conducted interviews at around the time of the Super Bowl, the participants drew upon this famously masculine event to illustrate how watching sports brings bros together.

The Super Bowl is one of my favorite events every year, because I always host the party and have thirty or forty people over no matter where I am. And it’s really important because on a day to day basis, you normally hang out with your really close bros, but events like March Madness, Super Bowl, people’s birthdays, things like that, when you actually hang out in a larger group of bros that aren’t really close, but still bros.

With events like the Super Bowl comes drinking and also of course those famous commercials that uphold hegemonic masculinity and also objectify women. Sports, women, and drinking fit together as the three pillars of the bro coliseum, allowing bros to form tight and lasting bonds, out of which emerges a strong sense of loyalty to one another.

Loyalty

The interviewees’ definitions of bro tended to go one of two ways. Some described the stereotypical clothing style choices associated with bros, while others looked past the surface and defined bro in terms of male friendship and loyalty. “Best definition of a bro,” mused Rob, “It’s just, probably someone who just enjoys hanging with the boys.” The men noted love, loyalty, and honesty as important characteristics to the bro identity. Max, a senior, felt it was especially important to spend time with his bros because of the looming graduation date.

Crouter 35 I just want to take advantage of every bit of time I have with my best friends. I’d say it’s just loyalty to your bros. Yeah, that’s my definition of it. Other people’s definition of it would be flat brims, you know the style, tall socks. Play some sort of sport, don’t want to associate with girls unless it’s in a sexual manner. But yeah, that’s not my definition. Like to me, a definition of a bro is a guy who loves his friends and wants to hang out with his friends.

Hearing the participants discuss the importance of loyalty and support for one’s bros was actually quite endearing. Cameron was one of the biggest emphasizers of loyalty and creating a solid support system for his closest friends. “The most important things are honesty and loyalty toward one’s bros. if you are two sided or two-faced you can’t be a bro because you’re defeating the first rule of bro-ness which is a society based on bringing up everybody else around you instead of improving yourself by bringing others down. And that’s kind of how I define bro culture.”

Priority System

Many of the participants framed the ideals of brotherhood and loyalty in terms of a priority system. According to Cameron, “the most important thing about a bro is he keeps his bros above all else in terms of priorities.” To bros, one’s loyalties lie where their priorities lie. Academics, individual interests, and of course women, are meant to be secondary issues for true bros. Hence the famous term, “bros before hos.” In their narratives, most of the participants either mentioned “bros before hos” or at least alluded to it. Harry explained, “don’t overvalue girls over your friends, and that’s also the kind of brotherhood thing, bro culture is kind of associated with not having a relationship with a girl, and I think bros before hos can be used when a guy is spending too much time with a girl and away from the friends.” Tyler added, “you should be hanging out with your boys and not your girlfriend.” Too much time spent with women goes against the priority system of bros, and bros before hos is a catchy way to call someone out for it.

Crouter 36 Additionally, the term bros before hos may not be as sexist as one might think if the bro is a female. “Caitlin, for instance, she’s one of my female bros, and she would jump in front of a car for me, just like I would do for her. We’re fiercely loyal to one another because she’s a female bro,” Cameron told me. “Bros before hos, but not hos in terms of all women. Girls can be bros too, but your friends are above all else.” Assumedly

Cameron would prioritize his female bros over males who weren’t his bros. As Pascoe

(2007) found that homophobic slurs were meant to police masculinity, not to be anti-gay, perhaps the “bros before hos” is not meant to directly degrade women, but serves the purpose of holding bros accountable to their male friend groups as a first priority.

Love and loyalty for one’s bros can become extreme in some cases, as Max pointed out to me. “Mitchell is probably the most loyal person to his friends I’ve ever met,” began Max. “He will do – he will be the biggest asshole, as I’m sure everyone knows, in order to – if he thinks he’s defending us or protecting us… he thinks that any time spent away from his bros, committed to his bros, is a betrayal.” Max then relayed to me a situation in which Mitchell took loyalty and “bros before hos” to new heights.

So he would rather, rather than on a Saturday night, rather than be in a room hooking up with a girl, sometimes he would rather leave in the middle of hooking up, to come hang out with us in the kitchen, because he would hear us talking in the kitchen. So any time away from us is a bad thing. That’s just a particular strange use of – yeah.

After the interview Max confessed to me that this had been a recent incident. Apparently

Mitchell was “mid-sex” when he heard Max and the rest of their housemates in the kitchen and left the woman in his bedroom to see what the bros were discussing. “We sent him back up there immediately,” Max assured me, shaking his head.

That sort of black and white loyalty, the sense of brotherhood among one another,

Crouter 37 and the adherence to hegemonic masculinity are what make up the bro identity, as described to me by the participants. Most emphasized the strong friendships and lighthearted stories that they associated with bro culture. When asked, however, they were able to identify and explain aspects of the bro lifestyle that they viewed as less than sunny. Their narratives about what they found to be problematic within bro culture reveal a contradiction between their personal values and the identity to which many of them subscribe. Because each participant said that they at least partially identify with bro culture, one would expect that the benefits of this outweigh the costs they described.

Sometimes I Can’t Keep Up

Partying multiple days per week, playing on various intramural sports teams, and maintaining a decent GPA sounds exhausting. It’s little wonder that some of the participants cited keeping up with the bro lifestyle as one of their main complaints. Max confessed,

I feel like I can’t keep up with it sometimes. Like last weekend - so last Friday night we drank, I don’t even know, I think we had a party – but we drank very heavily. Saturday we had Brolympics during the day and then we – I’m trying to remember if we had a party or not. But I blacked out. So at no point did I feel like I bitched out or anything, like I feel like I went as hard as I possibly could. And then Sunday was the super bowl and I just couldn’t do it. All my friends started drinking at eleven, and I was this close to throwing up all day. Could not do it. Wanted to. Super bowl, wanted to rally, but I just couldn’t do it. And um, both me and Dillon were tortured the whole day for not doing it.

Similarly, Harry, when asked if being a bro was difficult in any way, said, “keeping up, alcohol wise, because you’re going to have days when you just don’t want to drink, but your friends push you to.”

In addition to keeping up with bro binge drinking, Barrett described the difficulty of balancing athletics with academics. Bros, he said, are

Crouter 38 definitely under pressure. For me and my friends, we were good athletes, got good grades, we’re socially very involved, you know, we’re just living the life. And you know, for someone who’s involved in that group who’s even slightly below that, they’re not as good at sports, they’re not playing at all. We’re on the same team, but they’re just like on the bench. Or they’re working hard at academics, but they just can’t get those A minuses, or the B plusses or the As, you know, whatever we’re getting. When you’ll like, go beyond that bro life and that bro mentality and you’re like dude, like, ‘I just feel shitty right now. You guys are playing all these sports. You guys have great grades. I just can’t do this. How do you guys do it?’

Pressure even exists to keep up on the ski slopes. The mob mentality can encourage dangerous ideas, as Bodey told me. “There are risks of being hardcore and skiing, and doing stupid stuff with your – because there’s always that bro mob mentality. Well everyone’s doing that, I don’t want to be a pussy, and not go off this cliff, or not go into this backcountry.” Pressures to drink and perform well academically and athletically, in addition to being a manly risk-taker point to pressures relating to hegemonic masculinity.

The “bro mob mentality” that Bodey mentioned suggests a certain expectation to conform to the group ideals in a bro peer group.

Conformity

The interviewees described the adaptation to bro culture as a natural progression when I asked how they each came into the culture. Jared, however, recognized that some

“bros” may seek to identify as such because of personal insecurities. Jared saw the faux- bro as an issue for those actively trying to conform to bro culture. Still, the majority of participants mused that the bro identity came to them organically as it is what many of them have always known, in line with Bourdieu’s (1980) notion of habitus.

Bro Since Birth, or At Least High School

“I define myself as a bro,” Rob said, “but I would say that I’ve kind of been one

Crouter 39 since I can remember. It’s just that as I’ve grown up, I’ve kind of learned how – that these things that I do and these things that I act as well and things and actions of my friends, have come to be described as being a bro.” Likewise, Lawson described his identification with bro culture as the outcome of a lifelong set of interests and priorities.

I think it’s one of those things that comes with time or not. You either, this is the type of thing that interests you, social stuff, that’s the most important to you, hanging out, and just taking it easy, life’s too short to work too hard type of stuff...I think I’ve always been, I wouldn’t have said when I was ten years old that I would be a bro, but like, the same things have been important to me my entire life. So friends, having fun, being outside, I love being outside, I think that’s a big part of bro culture. Um, and later on drinking and partying. So yeah, I would say I have been [a bro] my whole life. It’s not like people are choosing to be bros. These people are brought together for a reason, and it’s because they have similar interests, just like any other group of people.

Another common explanation for the participants’ identification with bro culture was their membership on a high school sports team, especially lacrosse.

I didn’t really get involved in it until eighth grade, ninth grade when I moved and went to this all boys prep school. And that’s kind of where it started. That’s just where I found my group of friends. And it wasn’t something we were conscious of. We weren’t like, oh we gotta do this. It was just what we were interested in. Lacrosse, and with lacrosse came a certain style. Kids came in wearing snap back [hats], you know, you want that, certain clothing you wore. And it just became sort of your lifestyle. And so I think it really started for me freshman year, especially when I started playing varsity lacrosse. And then it definitely became more prevalent the more we started to party. And then it kind of, those pieces I was talking about kind of fall into throughout high school. We played sports and then by junior year, even sophomore year, we started kind of catching onto that bro lifestyle. Certain things, I think it just involved sports, the outdoors, you know, all guys school. It was just all the connections for bro lifestyle.

Barrett’s mention of lacrosse and his all-boys prep school is telling because he offered it up as a natural way in which bros become bros. Many others cited common interests and priorities as explanations for how bros come to identify as such and then subsequently find each other.

Crouter 40 Unhealthy Ideals

When asked questions such as “Are there aspects of bro culture that you don’t like?” or “Are there aspects of bro culture that you find problematic?” some of the participants mentioned bro culture “gone too far” or the unfortunate instance of an un- genuine person trying to live up to the ideals of bro culture. The extreme side of bro culture is something the participants tried to distance themselves from and instead attempted to frame themselves as considerate, reasonable versions of bro.

I mean, like if, for the people who take it too seriously. Like if you were to take everything too seriously then – like on Bros Like This Site, if you were to take that seriously, I mean, I feel like that’s a little much. You can’t just have no respect for women. There’s obviously a line. Joking can only go so far. Yeah, if you actually live by that code of just fucking girls and being a complete dick, just because – there’s something a little bit wrong with you.

Lawson also discussed the possibility of bro culture going too far when it borders on blatant disrespect of others for no particular reason. “I’m all for people being loud and boisterous and having fun, getting crazy and doing ridiculous things,” Lawson explained,

“but when it bothers other people I don’t think that’s cool. I think of myself as a pretty considerate person. When you’re doing things just to fuck with people, and being an asshole, it’s like, that can be problematic.”

While Max and Lawson discussed the bros they found to be offensive, Jared spoke about people unnaturally trying to be bro out of insecurity, suggesting that bro identity covers a wide range of individual motives and issues. Because bro culture aligns so closely with hegemonic masculinity, it was no surprise when Jared discussed the problems of those attempting to conform to something that they genuinely are not. “I think if you’re trying to be something you’re not, that’s difficult. And so if you see this, watch movies and or do whatever, and see this as the ideal and try to conform to that,

Crouter 41 yeah, that’s difficult and that’s hurtful.” When I asked him how one becomes a bro he said,

I mean you could learn, you could learn to become a bro, but it wouldn’t be genuine. You could do all those things, you could do all those common things that are accepted as bro – you could start playing lacrosse, like wear tons of Vineyard Vines – do whatever like, get into sports. But if you’re not like into those things, then it’s stupid. I don’t think it’s going to bring happiness.

Like the rest, Jared conceptualized true bro identity as something one leans toward naturally. He pointed out though, that some individuals see bro as an ideal for which to strive, and more broadly bro culture as a place in which one should fit, whether male or female. It is important not to leave women out of the discussion of the implications of bro culture, because, as Barrett pointed out, girls are a huge part of bro culture as well, “in the whole social life, in the whole sports life as well.”

Bros have expectations for women, and some of the participants mentioned a counterpart or equivalent for women to bro culture. Some bros talked about “biddies,” a somewhat derogatory term for young women who enjoy partying, while Jared posited the female equivalent to bro culture as the sister school to his all-boys’ prep school. Jared told me a particular tragic outcome of one of his female friends whom he thought suffered from the pressure to conform to bro culture, or its female counterpart.

My all-boys school has a sister school. So bros are defined by whatever characteristics we talk about, and the female equivalent of that, um. I don’t know. Personally, I had a pretty close friend of mine in high school who was kind of part of that entire social scene. Um, she killed herself at a party. And, like, it was very linked to insecurities about her body and about her acceptance, social acceptance. But I feel like when people try to change to adapt to this mold, that can be just, like, so, just like very harmful. So yeah, it’s just not healthy to change who you are – it’s just a spiral of sadness, to feel like you’re inadequate and then fix the problem, but it’s not who you are, it’s not fixing itself, it just sucks.

Conformity to bro culture, whether male or female, can lead one down a destructive path,

Crouter 42 as experienced by Jared. And because bro identity is supposed to be “natural,” those attempting to live up to the ideals of bro culture face the additional pressure of making bro look effortless. The varying degrees of conformity and smooth adaptation to bro culture further support the notion that bros come in many shapes and sizes, but that within the variations lie certain expectations, especially to be a “natural bro,” which was one aspect of the bro definition offered by the aforementioned “I’d Rather Be a Bro” blogger.

Emotional and Intellectual Suppression

Another argument for the label of hegemonic masculinity pinned to bro culture is the lack of emotional expression described by the interviewees and noted by Kimmel

(2008) in addition to the lack of meaningful conversation topics amongst bros. Some of the participants discussed the expectation for bros not to show too much emotion and also the shortage of intellectual conversations.

No Emotions Allowed

Jimmy cited lack of bro support in terms of more emotional issues. “You definitely encounter emotional blockades if you want to talk about serious issues with your friends who are bros.” When asked to elaborate on that statement he explained,

“talking to my friends about breaking up with my girlfriend - no one really knows what to say or is very supportive. But talking to girls about it or my family about it, I get a lot more closure – or a lot more emotional support. Um, so I think that at a material level, your bros are really your best support group you have, but then past that, maybe not.”

Jimmy’s bros may not be comfortable talking about his breakup because of what

Crouter 43 Bodey think of as the suppression of emotions in bro culture. “I think one of the big parts about being a bro is that, there’s a certain denial of the emotions of the bro. They don’t want to accept, they don’t always want to talk about feelings or deeper things. It’s more a shallow lifestyle in some regards”

Deeper Conversations

Other interviewees noted the propensity of “surface” or “material” levels of friendship within bro culture, especially in terms of conversation topics. As Bodey put it,

“it’s not as cool to be seen as smart or have those intellectual – but to just dumb it down.

It’s essentially a very primitive culture in some regards.” Tyler mused that one of his lacrosse-playing classmates would be unlikely to be able to discuss more intellectual topics among his team. “This kid Dillon I hang out with from my class, I don’t – I’m sure he’s a nice kid all the time, but I could imagine him acting more bro-y when he’s around the lax team, because he likes to talk about Arabic and stuff that we’re learning, but I can’t imagine him saying ‘I learned the whole Arabic alphabet’ to the lacrosse team.”

Lawson postulated, “I wouldn’t say bros are like writing or watching interesting films or anything like that.”

Ironically, despite the expectation for “dumbed down” leisure time, bros still enjoy varying degrees of success as pros on Wall Street or as entrepreneurs. The graduate

I interviewed is the founder of Statusbro.com, a screen-printing business specializing in products that glorify the bro lifestyle. Stickers and t-shirts that read “Bro Hard or Bro

Home” and “Do it for the story,” have made Lawson a profit of around $10,000, that began with an $80 investment. So while bros may not talk about art and prefer to pound beers rather than sip wine, their actions do not always match what they choose to discuss

Crouter 44 among each other.

Stereotypes and Stigmas

Overwhelmingly, the participants cited what they perceived to be unfair stereotypes and stigmas attached to the bro identity and culture. Their complaints normally came up in passing or specifically when I asked them if they found anything to be problematic about bro culture or if they wanted to change anything in it.

There’s More to Bros than Meets the Eye

Some of the participants felt that bros were unfairly seen as “assholes” and proclaimed that one needs to get to know them on a deeper level in order to discover their true personalities.

I could definitely see people having the idea that bros are just arrogant, and they can be very like assholes, they’re just like not, they’re selfish. They could definitely come off for some people. I obviously like to differ. When you get to know people at a different level. I think a lot of their attitude has to do with upholding this bro lifestyle. If you don’t know them that well you’re gonna have a different attitude unless you know them well.

Cameron felt very strongly against the stigma of bros and mentioned it as the sole thing he did not like about bro culture. “There are definitely some people on campus who consider me to be a bro, and therefore an asshole without meeting me. And I would hope that people would have the common decency and respect for a fellow human being to get to know them before they would judge.”

Cameron’s argument is fairly relevant, and applies to what other interviewees said about the stereotype of the stupid bro. Bros, Lawson told me, “tend to be especially at

Colorado College, smart people, but they don’t always act it.” He also described ways in which bros succeed academically, but with a bro twist. Though he didn’t tell me about his

Crouter 45 senior art project, I know from friends about his display of Pabst Blue Ribbon beer cans littering a grimy table that was showcased in the arts building on campus alongside photographs and paintings by other students. Lawson did however, offer a particularly bro-y anecdote about bro friends of his who did well on his senior theses while still maintaining a bro image.

Andrew – who was an environmental science major, he stayed up the entire night before his thesis presentation partying, and then went and did his presentation in a cutoff shirt, completely drunk, and did well. There’s another kid who thought his thesis was due two Fridays, two weeks, but it turns out it was that Friday, and he’d only written fifteen pages of it, so instead of going and studying hard and getting an extension, he stayed awake for three days straight and wrote the paper and got an A. Uh, people are smart.

To assume that bros are unintelligent is similar to saying that women are bad drivers or that black people are criminals. Despite the stereotype that bros are less than bright, every single participant had an example to prove that stigma incorrect. Mitchell, for example, in addition to hosting the Brolympics and leaving women in his bedroom while he chats with the boys, is a star economics student whom Max says wins many awards in the department. It is important to give bros credit where credit is due and remember that they are individual, multi-faceted human beings with interests and talents outside of the stereotypes that bro culture exudes as a whole. With such a range of personalities and types of bros, the narratives of the men I interviewed suggest that with the potential for a fluidity of bro-ness, there may also exist a potential for a fluidity within hegemonic masculinity itself. The interviewee’s discussions and thoughts about women are illuminating in terms of the range of progressive and traditional views found amongst bros and further attest to flexibility bro culture engulfs.

Crouter 46 Bros and Women

Another stereotype that the interviewees tried to debunk in their narratives was that of the bad reputation bros sometimes fall into when it comes to women, dating, and hooking up. When asked if bros prefer to hook up rather than date, the answers were mixed. Bodey mused that “I think that a lot of guys, if on the surface, say they just want to hook up, but in the back of their mind they want to date someone, but they’re afraid of the commitment, they’re afraid of being tied down and not being single anymore, not being able to do what they want.” I found this idea compelling, especially after Harry added his two cents to the topic. He described to me what he thought of as the bro reasoning for tending to choose hooking up over dating.

It’s just like, I want to have sex or I want to hook up with a girl, and not have to actually worry about any of the social implications and making conversation and stuff that requires more composure. You care less about how you act with a one- night stand than with a girl you’re actually trying to establish a relationship with. So it takes away a lot of the work you would put in with a girl you’d want to date.

Like Kimmel’s’ theory that binge drinking appeals to college men because it entails “all of freedom with none of the responsibility,” (Kimmel 2008:109) the hookup culture provides the same benefits. The “work” that Harry cited can be taken to mean emotional labor and thus the emotional vulnerability that Bodey mentioned as well, which makes sense in the context of hegemonic masculinity and the ideal that bros are not supposed to express excessive amounts of emotion.

On the other hand, some participants, like Cameron, told me that many of his bro friends are in committed, functional relationships. “Bullshit!” he proclaimed, when I asked him about the assumption that bros prefer to hook up rather than date.” Nine out of twelve of my bros have girlfriends,” he said. Max has a long-term girlfriend, and as

Crouter 47 mentioned earlier, Jimmy until recently had been in a relationship for over three years.

Thus, the frustration of some of the participants is understandable, considering the ways in which they perceive the bro stereotype about women.

The stereotype that bros treat women poorly or with disrespect, however, exists for a reason. With the exception of Cameron, every other interviewee mentioned that misogyny was a problem they had with bro culture, and a couple of them were able to offer concrete examples.

Tyler, for example, is part of an ongoing Facebook message thread, on which bros he knew from high school post funny or wild college stories. After assuring me he was not friends with the writer of one particular story, Tyler continued, “this one kid, went into the bathroom, this girl had passed out while puking in the toilet, and he peed on her, while she was passed out. Yeah, and he wrote this story about it and everyone was like

‘what the fuck, that girl is a fucking idiot,’ talking down about the girl. So yeah, it’s very misogynistic.” Like the story about his friend who called a freshman woman a slut via text message, Tyler was able to accurately label occurrences of misogyny and deem them wretched. Similarly, Jared cited misogyny as a part of bro culture to which he does not subscribe. “I have a girlfriend and I love her very much,” he said to qualify his statement.

The interviewees seemed upset about the degree of stigma attached to the bro identity, yet they were able to provide me with disgusting, sexist, and illustrative anecdotes that uphold the very stereotypes with which they disagreed. Additionally, they each identified with bro culture to some degree, with six of them self-identifying as bros.

It is the contradictions, fluidities, and diversity within bro culture that challenges the seemingly one-way street called hegemonic masculinity, certainly not in terms of its

Crouter 48 definition, but in terms of its options.

CONCLUSION

The characteristics that the participants identified in their definitions of bro lead clearly to the categorization of bro under hegemonic masculinity. The typical race, class, sexual orientation, physical abilities, and even career track of the bro describe him as a hegemonically masculine young adult male. What my participants tried to emphasize to me in many of their responses was that there are many types of bros, and bros especially at Colorado College are “less extreme” than others. CC bros as the sort of socially aware, progressive bros certainly fits into the campus’ style and reputation, and the participants accordingly espoused liberal ideas about homosexuality and sexism. With this in mind, it is important to note that the men had plenty of examples of such things as sexism and homophobia. They tried to distance themselves from those examples by telling me “that’s not what I think” or they would say that they would “call someone out” for using homophobic slurs or treating a woman badly.

Even while the men said that they were tired of drinking to excess every weekend and struggling to balance the bro lifestyle with academics and other commitments, their narratives about the benefits of bro culture seemed to outweigh their complaints, for every single participant at least partially identified with bro culture. Friendship, love, honesty, and loyalty to the brotherhood emerged as themes that presumably make the bro identity worth it. And while none of the participants said it directly, though some mentioned it as a difficult ideal to achieve, bro culture is arguably at the top of the masculine food chain among college men – another reason why the participants might choose to relate themselves to it.

Crouter 49 The range of opinions, interests, concerns, and personalities among the participants’ narratives suggests that bro culture encompasses much more than the lacrosse-playing, womanizing buffoon that makes up the stereotype of the bro. From southern frat bros to Jewish bros to CC bros, it would be unfair to put bros into a box.

Within each type of bro however, hegemonic masculinity appears to remain prevalent.

Thus it may be that hegemonic masculinity contains more fluidity and variety than previously imagined, but continues to be difficult to accomplish.

If bros comprise one conception of hegemonic masculinity and contain so much variation, then we would expect other forms of hegemonic masculinity to be nuanced as well. Additionally, the other three forms of Connell’s masculinity – complicit, marginalized, and subordinated – likely contain their own variations. One might wonder, for example, if there is a hegemonic masculinity within marginalized or subordinated masculinity. The possibilities seem endless. However, this is not to say that Connell’s categories of masculinity are obsolete. Bro culture reinforces the categories in many ways. A complicit masculinity may be revealed as a fake form of bro, while marginalized and subordinated masculinities would likely find it even more difficult to align with bro culture considering its white, affluent, heteronormative roots.

The most obvious limitation of the study is that I spoke with a mere ten males at a small, liberal arts college in Colorado. However, the CC bro, and more broadly, the liberal arts college bro is particularly compelling because, according to my sample, he is likely to offer progressive critiques about bro culture, and thus possesses the knowledge, though maybe not the motivation or courage, to challenge bro culture and hold it to a higher standard. I saw that potential in each of my participants, and indeed, many of them

Crouter 50 described resisting problematic aspects of bro culture. The “bro mob mentality” described by Bodey however, is the difficult hurdle to overcome in regards to improving bro culture. “If you changed bro culture, it wouldn’t be bro culture anymore,” Tyler told me.

A more comprehensive study would include bros from a diverse set of colleges and universities. The “southern frat bro” in particular might be an illuminating group to study, for example. If possible, gathering data from bros of different social classes, race, and perhaps though less likely, sexual orientation, would further knowledge about bro culture. Additionally, it would be interesting to study other countries’ versions of young hegemonic masculinity, such as Britain’s lad, and compare some of those types of men to

America’s bro culture.

Further limitations of my research include that I did not speak with any women about their views and perceptions of bro culture. The female perspective would add an important addition to the conversation about bros. It would also be useful to collect data from males who do not identify as bros or with bro culture. Because I only spoke with self-identified bros and those who identified with aspects of the culture, it would be interesting to see what women and other types of men have to say about bros.

I do feel however, that my participants gave me invaluable insight into a world I would not have been to explore without them. What they illuminated to me is that bro identity is fluid even while it adheres to hegemonic masculinity, and that bros are forced to reconcile what they perceive to be problematic about the culture with their own positive self-conceptions. The variations among bro culture suggest that hegemonic masculinity itself may contain nuances and contradictions among its members. The ultimate hope is that nuances and contradictions may rise to more fluid conceptions of

Crouter 51 masculinity generally, so that men (and women) are freer to explore gender on a wide spectrum.

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Whitson, David. 1990. “Sport in the Social Construction of Masculinity.” Pp. 19-30 in

Sport, Men, and the Gender Order: Critical Feminist Perspectives, edited by

M.A. Messner and D.F. Sabo. Champaign, IL: Human Kinetics.

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Appendix

Interview Guide

General Notions of What a Bro Is Can you give me your best definition of a bro? Can you tell me about some of the things bros do that are specifically bro? Do bros wear particular clothing/have a particular style? Can you describe the typical bro body/mold? Do you think there are typical attitudes associated with being a bro? Are there any rules associated with bro culture? If so, what are they?

The Bro in School Do you think bros study particular academic fields? If so, which subjects would you expect them to major/minor in? Do you think academics are a priority to most bros? How well is a bro expected to do in school? Compared to a bro’s other activities, how much time does a bro put into schoolwork? What do most bros expect to get out of college? What does most bros expect to do after college? What kinds of careers most bros aspire to? What kind of jobs?

Bros and Sports Do you think sports are important to most bros? How important? Do you think they enjoy mostly playing them, watching them, or both? Which sports are they most interested in? Uninterested in?

Bros and Drinking/Partying How much do bros drink? For example, how many times a week? In what context? Can you describe bro drinking/partying habits? What? How often? How much? Where? What is the role of drinking in bro culture? How important is it? How much do you drink and how often? In what context? Is there a bro or non-bro way to drink/party? What is the goal behind most bros’ drinking?

Bros and Women Do you think bros have any particular attitudes toward women? How would you expect a bro to conduct himself around women? There is an assumption that bros are interested in hooking up, not dating. Do you think this is true? Are there particular ways that bros either hook up or date? Do you think many bros date? Why or why not? How do you think most women perceive or think about bros?

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Do you think bros care about what other bros what is acceptable when it comes to women? Do you think most bros are concerned about how women perceive/interpret any sexual advances they might make? Ranging from showing interest to touching to potential assault. Do you think women and men have difficulty communicating leading up to sexual activity? Do you think there are often instances when sexual activity occurs and the sexes misinterpret each other? Do you think some women give a message of wanting to engage in sexual activities? What are some of those indicators? Are most bros are interested in pornography? Is there anything unique about bro consumption of pornography compared with other men?

Bromance Are bros mostly friends with each other or do they have bro and non-bro friends? For example, how many of your friends are bros? Do you think bros conduct themselves differently around bros versus non-bros? If so, how? Do you think bros have particular attitudes toward heterosexuality/homosexuality? What are they? Are there particular activities you associate with bro-ness and/or activities you think are especially important to bro culture?

Negative Aspects of Bro Culture Do you personally identify with bro culture? Would you consider yourself to be a bro? Do you think others perceive you as a bro? Why? How did you come into the bro culture? Did you want to? Does being a bro benefit you in some ways? Do you exert effort into maintaining the bro image? How so? Tell me how you’re being bro. Are there aspects of bro culture that you don’t like? What are they? Are there aspects of bro culture that you believe to be harmful/risky? Physically, emotionally, mentally? Are there any aspects of bro culture you find problematic or that you would like to change? Do you think it’s difficult being a bro? If so, what? Are there particular pressures you feel exist within the bro culture? How do you think bro culture affects others? Positively or negatively? Bros, non- bros, women etc. How does one learn to become a bro at CC? What is the most likely way? Do you think there is a stereotype of the bro? Do you think they are true or do you refute them? Is there anything else you would like to share about bro culture or your thoughts about anything we’ve discussed? Do you have any questions for me?

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Bro Identity and Subsequent Feelings Consent Form Emily Crouter Sandi Wong Colorado College Department of Sociology 719-389-6820 [email protected]

You are invited to take part in a research study of bro culture and the effects on its participants.

What the study is about: This study is designed to gain a fuller understanding of what it means to be a bro and more specifically, the meaning it carries for individuals who identify with that culture. There is also going to be a component that investigates social media involving the bro, studying websites such as brobible.com in addition to observations made at parties.

What you will be asked to do: As a participant, you will be asked to participate in an approximately one to two hour interview. You will be asked questions regarding bro culture and your personal experiences and feelings surrounding the identity.

Risks and benefits: Due to the sensitive nature of masculinity, sexuality, alcohol use, and relationships being addressed in this study, the questions asked, and/or the discussion could be emotionally upsetting to you as a participant. By participating in this study, you will receive a $10 gift card to Phantom Canyon. Results from this study will be used to expand on the literature and knowledge surrounding masculinity, college men, and bro culture.

Taking part is voluntary: Taking part in this study is completely voluntary. If you choose to be in the study you can withdraw at any time without consequences of any kind. You may choose to skip certain questions, take a break, or stop the interview at any time. Participating in this study does not mean that you are giving up any of your legal rights.

Your answers will be confidential: The records of this study will be kept private. Data will be kept on digital recorders and then destroyed once the discussions have been fully transcribed. Transcriptions of the interview will be kept on a personal computer in a password-protected folder to which only the researcher has access. The interview will be labeled with an alias name. Any report of this research that is made available to the public will not include your name or any other individual information by which you could be identified. [

If you have questions or want a copy or summary of the study results: Contact the researcher at the email address or phone number above. You will be given a copy of this form to keep for your records. If you have any questions about whether you have been treated in an illegal or unethical way, contact the Colorado College Institutional Research Board chair, Amanda Udis-Kessler at 719-227- 8177 or [email protected].

Statement of Consent: I have read the above information, and have received answers to any questions. I consent to take part in the research study of [topic of research]

______Participant’s Signature Date

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Facesheet

Preferred Alias: Year: Sexual Orientation: Hometown: Type of High School Attended and Name of School: Type of Middle School and Name of School: Major:

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